Every Telstra Worker Ever

🎉 PATREON : / garncomedy
🎉 NEW Garn Merch! lonelykidsclub...
have you got 2-3 hours to waste on hold while i f around in the control panel? you do? perfectttttttttttttt
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Written & Directed by Declan Evanson

[@aliciabaumgartner1406]

You forgot about the neat little trick of telling any customer that walkes into your store with a problem that, as of recently, their specific issue can't be resolved in store and they need to call some new department within the corporate headquarters. The number can be found online, you say.

[@realdookoos]

so accurate that this pains me

[@CassTrashPuppy]

Happened to me last week.fuckers

[@MasterCurry69]

I did this on purpose at Vodafone with middle aged men that were absolute shit heads with me in store. Loved seeing reactions.

[@Kayenne54]

Online. Oh yeah. Right. Modem stopped working. Called Tits Up to get it fixed. They told me, and I quote "You can sort this out online". cue maniacal laughter from me. Guy in New Delhi did NOT get the joke. In a war, the first casualty is a sense of humour. P.S. Well, in a way, he was correct. If I'd be willing to pay $1800 plus dollars over three years for an already out of date new mobile phone, I could have vainly attempted to sort it out on that.

[@classydays43]

But the store tells you that if you upgrade to their ultra premium service, it won't fix the problem, but you'll end up paying much more for the same bullshit.

[@rafunki2862]

You blokes are gonna be the next best Aussie legends I’m callin it now

[@stackerv8617]

so true

[@JetJockey87]

Hey hey get in line I've been here for a week following these lads now

[@clancywoods7728]

You're right. He already gained like a third of his subs in a day lol

[@braydonhart6698]

Agreed

[@Antonio00213]

Yay I’m 5th on ur comment

[@Itermago]

"i'm more of a hands on guy when it comes to scammin anyway." top tier comedy lads

[@abberss]

Murphy is like the Aussie version of Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Long lost cousins, perhaps?

[@flats2774]

@@abberss an Aussie tpb would be hilarious.

[@ZorroValdus]

"If you got any troubles, uhh...don't ring me." The fact that it's fuckin' true, holy shit.

[@evanb8495]

@daroal butts gonna report you for spam at this rate buddy

[@borgKick]

ive heard that shit

[@lovessauce9550]

Then they make you pay for the second time they come back for a problem they could've easily fix the first time.

[@Kayenne54]

The only other "company" that does this, and seriously gets away with it as well, is Centrelink.

[@samanthastandley2341]

Yep

[@bedtimemma]

"I pick a house in the area I manage and just send em back to the fuckin dark ages" LMAO

[@Kayenne54]

Happens to me every other day around 3 pm. Must be just before they go on smoko break.

[@purplerain2314]

@daroal butts FO

[@kristenfromOZ]

😂😂😂😂

[@bobfgg3967]

The fact that he is playing Cool Maths Games makes it so good 😂😂😂

[@Zei33]

Fucking surprised it still works now that Flash is completely disabled.

[@bobfgg3967]

@@Zei33 Lol

[@jotarokujo4787]

@@Zei33 there are some games that have flash with them

[@patricklauer4452]

Cool maths games was the shit!

[@Beaut_Beau]

Hey, i thought this was supposed to be a comedy, not a documentary!

[@JoeyRuinsEverything]

😂😂

[@andrewthomas695]

As Homer Simpson once said, "It's funny because it's true."

[@-unactive-7240]

Same, sounds like a docco to me

[@dfgiuy22]

I'll ring you in 18 months and sell you a new phone and offer to drop your bill by 20%... Not including the fact ya phone raises it by 40%. Good luck son

[@raptorjesus3894]

As someone who's Telstra internet has been dropping out at random intervals, and slow as balls when it does work for no fucking reason whatsoever lately, this is entirely too accurate.

[@ElectrifiedGremlin]

Is the internet in your area also 1 gb upload and 600 kb download

[@SigrunHT]

I'm constantly having to call Telstra about the WiFi dropping out completely. I then get to a New Delhi agent (scammer) who does a pretend check and passes me on to the NBN people. Then I get a text saying it's fixed, but it's not. They think we're all stupid and don't know what's going on. They used to give me stuff for free to compensate me for the trouble, now nothing, just the runaround.

[@ExabyteAU]

facts

[@Kayenne54]

but WAIT!! iF YOU go on their online internet site, they are MORE THAN HAPPY to upsell something which will ensure that the modem they made you pay for, is boosted with a WI-FI booster to every corner of your house, so this will never happen again. Obviously, your computer is sitting more than 12 inches from the modem. Silly you.

[@ElectrifiedGremlin]

@@Kayenne54 secondary modems will not fix the awful speeds and reliability of living far from a city

[@passtheboxfox5374]

Already read the title and clicked as fast as i good, bloody good job mate

[@passtheboxfox5374]

Could* FUCK

[@darrin3364]

Sick

[@VainerCactus0]

Then you had to wait while crappy Telstra internet loaded slowly?

[@MetalSnakers]

'bricklayers laptop noises' had me in tears - set up a patreon ya dirty birds

[@scotty932096]

This is literally Telstra: Behind the Scenes.

[@megamanstarforce4315]

"I pick a house in the area I manage and just send em back to the fuckin dark ages" I see that Garn has moved over to optus

[@zeppelinshy]

as someone who works in the industry I can say this is spot on what we do

[@chasecorcoran4215]

I’m privileged to be at this Chanel befor it blows up

[@hi2740]

Already has mate, was at 13k last week

[@webstarproductionsw.s.p9115]

Oath

[@tamaracoba]

This is so accurate. I used to work for telecom, which later became Telstra. People thought I was making it up when I told them telecom is going to be Telstra, and everyone will own a mobile phone by 2000. This was in 93.

[@edithallma4810]

I love the subtle accent change between the office worker and the tradie

[@pat3316]

Got a semi when this poped up in my feed

[@anataokudoku3118]

I now have a semi

[@karlslife2635]

Damit I got a full

[@MIck-M]

Got half a mongrel - noice.

[@nunika1975]

Summed up Telstra perfectly

[@jogendramahat5905]

Best Aussie youtube content. Keep it coming mate.

[@dogmachine2406]

Do u work for telstra?

[@jogendramahat5905]

@@dogmachine2406 Oh, I Wish Mate. But no.

[@SaquavisTV]

Bro the call to the guy about waiting on hold killed me 🤣

[@jamesfalzon9364]

Love random earrape when he was rippin the old modem out

[@GarnComedy]

actual in-camera audio from our fucked wireless mics

[@jamesfalzon9364]

even better keep up the comedy. Looking forward to the next vid, and congrats on 45k subs (wait what 45k subs, last u checked u were at what 2.7, shit thats good)

[@dfsafadsDW]

That red office works racing chair in the background. Perfect

[@theoneguyforsix4772]

If you're with Telstra you'll realise how accurate this video is!

[@LastChanceFossil]

Saw 4 videos, subscribed. You’ve got my full support

[@benduffy4956]

"Got any problems, dont ring me" and you know what, i live by that.

[@TehBIGrat]

Can confirm this is 100% how Chorus works here over the ditch.

[@mikewhite3670]

I would laugh but being a Telstra customer this is 110% accurate. 😂😂

[@LarryB]

@2:26 That's funny as hell. I worked for a big cable company here in the states. If I couldn't figure out an issue but could still pass my checks I'd often just give the customer new equipment. It made them happy and I could get the f out of there and let it be someone else's problem. Sometimes problems are down the line and there's nothing a field tech can do about it.

[@lilly8269]

This guy makes me even prouder to be Australian 🇦🇺 🤙

[@gregkunst8199]

Ikr lol

[@Flyingsquirrel69420]

Took two bloody hours to watch this video. Bloody Telstra cut my line.

[@workout9594]

This is peak Australian Comedy

[@samuelkatherinediozarago7692]

6 years ago,I had an internet breakdown due to next door neighbo digging driveway without checking stuff,Called my Internet service provider,They Called TELSTRA.Technician came. I was at the front talking With the tech, he looked at the iob and went to his van and called his Hq or whatever and said "No one is at Home" literally while talking with me.Same minute my ISP called while the guy was moving his items into his van while I said wtf mate?? He took of like a true cnt. Waited another 10days and another bloke came,found the issue and fixed it in 15mins max. Had similar fun with NBN in 2020,tech arrived,said there is an issue with main dist. system and promised he will be back soon,took off and stopped answering any calls. 1 month later I had to reschedule for another cnt...This documentary is spot on.

[@exannuc]

This series is extremely consistent

[@Jacloch]

Fucking need 1 of these a day, actually makes my fucking day.

[@Dr.MaalPraktise]

Damn, Garn is *too* relatable, give these guys an oscar already!

[@jsh4bt]

I'm a telstra tech and this is exactly what's it's like and I love it 🤣🤣

[@BrizzysTrains]

Carl Barron: when ever someone says Telstra someone has to go “oh fuckin Telstra, don’t start, and they Gotta change their name to fucking Telstra, imagine if that was their name “good morning, fucking Telstra, how can we piss you off today”

[@MegaCorey1977]

So glad I’m part of this legend before 100k subscribers

[@northeydesign]

How the fuck do these keep getting better?! Love it boys

[@Dodzfather]

GARN you deserve youtube fame and success i watch your videos and show everyone i can to spread the love

[@remixlego]

'If you got any troubles ahh... don't ring me' haha basically my life motto

[@mast3r705]

this dude is a legend. period.

[@Bridgette1111]

Superior content ~ u are presently owning this genre 🔥

[@michaelpetherbridge1321]

As a former Telstra employee, here's some tips. Any issues you need resolved, they can 100% do it in-store and call support. It will take less than 5 minutes, but they tell you to call because the bosses are under so much pressure to make kpi's, that they drill sargeant their employees to do the same. Completely diminishing their employees mental health at the same time. I used to go above and beyond and had so many customers who only wanted to be served by me (mainly oldies, because I'm not going to try and sell an 85 yr old woman a brand new phone, which is what HR wanna see). Also, if you do need to call support. Call the sales team (because they answer quicker 😉), and genuinely act surprised when they answer and ask to be sent through to complaints/account disputes etc. They can transfer you, and should. If they say they don't know their number, they're lying. Also, i had to deal with this shit all the time. Any "free" accessories you get, they're not free... EVER. You pay extra on your bill. No you don't have to accept the accessories. If you do get sucked in and the employee isnt genuine, and tells you theyre free even when theyre not. It is fixable, and you can receive a credit on your bill, once you hand back your accessories to the store. I do miss working at Telstra, because I was so genuine and everyone colleague and customer knew it. But its management that destroys every good sales consultant. Its toxic, too much pressure for such little gain. If management just chilled out, id 100% go back, i miss helping people

[@_KungFuChicken_]

I can't wait for this channel to explode! Bloody good content mate!

[@spankywestern940]

Wont be long Murph. You're going to go through the roof mate! Great work!

[@vasekfrydl6373]

The man's got cool math games open on his computer, what an absolute legend.

[@hotcakes1117]

Made my Monday!

[@samB_o]

I haven't lived in Townsville for 10 years... but this shit just speaks to me. Loving the content brother, its a sub from me!

[@robertperren3577]

I worked with queenslanders. Didn't know why they gave townsville so much shit. But i get it now with this y̶o̶u̶t̶u̶b̶e̶ documentary channel

[@fatetato2852]

This really is the pinnacle of Aussie comedy.

[@stormy4752]

my dad works for telstra, I sometimes help him with the work. can confirm this is %100 accurate.

[@CommanderCarroll]

Perfect delivery, love it

[@christianmcbrearty]

I was just thinking today, I can't wait for another video! Lucky me 😂

[@ChewiestBacca]

Best thing I've found on KZbin. Thank you recommendations!

[@esther.petrovich]

Well done! You are a wonderful man.

[@Atari-5200]

As a former telstra employee, this is amazing

[@jacksondobell3235]

You are an absolute LEGEND. Best funny content I've seen in a while. Keep it up mate.

[@williamhoward7777]

1:18 "Bricklayer laptop noises"😂😂😂😂

[@superior4295]

0:40 cool math games I lost it 🤣🤣🤣

[@nathanking6670]

god tier

[@donnydarc6490]

What a bloody legend mate. Big ups big dog keep It up🤙🏼

[@shadowmagii]

Why does this feel so fuckin accurate mate

[@slinkyveil6031]

Cant wait to see this channel blow up

[@siriusAESTHETIC]

youtube recommendations coming in clutch 🤙

[@thegift6749]

the changing of the modems paint killed me XD

[@Nick-420-]

Your a deadset legend, you deserve your own tv show your vids are a fkn riot.

[@RemainingNameless]

Been here since you were at 11k subs glad to get to see you grow!

[@cLaShFaT]

I used to work for Telstra and fuck me dead this is pin point accurate.

[@MP39]

this is absolute gold keep up the great content

[@Poncap]

The like to dislike ratio is pretty fuckin good to be honest

[@yourenotwrong3511]

4.8k to 8 not bad is it 🤣

[@hisokalperv1096]

Even if the comedy wasnt as good as it was I'd still like it for shitting on telstra

[@SQuiDFPV]

dislikes are telstra employees not wanting to be exposed, they love doing nothing and getting paid

[@carloRX78K2]

@@SQuiDFPV actually as much as they like doing nothing and doing pitiful jobs and taking calls everyday, as a former telstra employee 99% of this very accurate and 1000% very relatable, also within the company telstra likes to fire there own employees, power struggles and power trips is VERY VERY COMMON, team leaders and OMs in each site likes to make us do "one day training" for very crucial processes THAT THEY WILL, AND can mark you down for not doing our job straight. Poor telstra i hope it bankrupts.

[@caelumellis2376]

So glad I found your channel early. Love your work bro.

[@TriHouse]

Can confirm that Spectrum operates like this too 😂

[@jamesburke9651]

Dragging the modem off & the paint were absolutely hilarious.

[@TheGreeny3003]

I died when they started spray painting the modem white. That would've genuinely worked better than the new garbage white modems they're currently putting out.

[@Backup-os9kq]

Yep u are gonna be the next best Aussie dudes I’m callin it I freakin love ur skits keep going 😂

[@blakepuustinen2156]

“If ya have any troubles, don’t ring me!” Comedy gold, that got me through today you fkin champion

[@nowthatsalotofdamage3433]

I love this mate. Keep it up bro!

[@Beetil]

Sprays the modem white and brings it back in 😂😂😂 hilarious

[@timedmonds172]

Keep it up mate. Love Aussie comedy 🍺

[@butler5322]

What a spike in subs I watched when you had 400 and now you have 43k. Only good things to come

[@DaniMacYo]

This was facking hilarious. Great job. Absolutely brilliant.

[@iNoToRiOuS]

Bro what's your twitter?

[@Tyler54986y]

Hello

[@BrockXL]

*gaybo*

[@yvngxlviii9279]

What’s doin inut

[@GarnComedy]

straight up don't have one bro - i should look into that hey

[@rrajubay]

Big INUT

[@Cypher84X]

Worked for AT&T for 5 years. Can confirm there are technicians out there like this

[@rainsverse]

Honestly this is so fkn funny. Thank you for this 😂

[@amberogrady4458]

Love love love this

[@MICHELLE-gu2qc]

As a ex employee I can say this is pretty accurate

[@justaguy5907]

Yes another upload love you man

[@robertbeauchamp5048]

I reckon a every townsville police officer ever is due

[@toksave8409]

The office location looks like the JCU Social study labs.

[@jordansezai1748]

You guys are gonna be up there with sooshimango and superwog, great comedy

[@closetab5278]

Epic video. Congrats on 1 million channel views!

[@darcyw8995]

So this is why my internet went of the other day... Must have been this fella

[@zeemonkeyman1]

The best way to hide a criminal enterprise is in broad daylight.

[@thebigsdog]

bloody true. I haven't been able to contact geltra for weeks. always that stupid AI thing picks up

[@happyzone1000]

Go for aussie broadband

[@benprince3570]

ON TRENDING!!!! i knew it u r going to blow up very soon. so keen.

[@marill338]

This is gold 😂

[@blayd_]

Legitimate definition of a bloke right here

[@FizzaMC]

Haha. There’s not too many safe jobs that aren’t in the sights of the lads to take the piss out of🤣🤣🤙

[@slipafk]

Oh boy have i been waiting for this

[@bradleyhorton5289]

You don’t have to ask me to subscribe and hit that Bell button, this guy is a legend brhhh

[@Paul-qq7mh]

This is very accurate

[@Phunkiedeknition]

im dealing with this shit with telstra now. Four months still without NBN even thiugh its already connected to the house

[@iamdave84]

When stay with Telstra if you have nbn on your doorstep?