Find a Partner and Stay Married | Best Financial Move

[@GettysGarage]

"the best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother" a quote I read a while back and it really took me a second to realize the power behind that.

[@01splitpea]

Yes. Another version, "If you want happy children, have a happy marriage."

[@kathleenlock8963]

I have two brothers and when we were kids I heard my dad say that to my brothers dozens of times, you're the first person I ever heard repeat that quote. It's so true.

[@NinjaLifeCrisis]

The worst thing mother can do is undermine her children's father...

[@rnupnorthbrrrsm6123]

That is one of my favorite quotes ! My husband spent our marriage tearing me down on a daily basis, 20 years ago I finally got brave enough to escape him but he hasn’t skipped a day, he uses my decision to divorce him to continue degrade me to our kids :( It’s certainly not the life I wanted 😒 I don’t want to be alone but the fear of what another person can do to you keeps me single :(

[@bubblegumbxtchh]

Lmao of course there’s always going to be bitter people whenever it comes to educating a man. Y’all really wanna stay in the caveman period that bad, huh?

[@davidsoderberg8726]

My wife and I have been married for 23 years. She was diagnosed with an aggressive and rare form of cancer and was told a year ago she would not make it a year. She beat the medical diagnosis and continues to fight. We are in the fight together and we now live with a new norm, but this is what commitment is all about. Life does not always give you the perfect life, but it is how you respond to it that defines and strengthens you. You provide words of wisdom Shawn. I pray younger people are listening to what you say.

[@niemi5858]

David, I am so glad that you and your wife dodged that bullet. Nothing brings your deep love for each other into sharp focus than facing a potential tradgety. Savor each moment, for all we really have is this moment. My wife was not so fortunate. It will be 21 years ago tomorrow that she lost her battle. I became both a widower and empty nester a month before turning 48. After almost 30 years together I was at a complete loss for a while. There's still a huge hole in me. I had lost most of what identified me - being in the role of being a husband, father, provider for family, etc. Your correct in saying "it is how you respond to it that defines and strengthens you". I noticed that you used "respond" instead of "react". That's a world of difference. Maybe for self preservation I chose to respond and learn as much as I could from my experience to become a better person. It took a lot of introspection and deep thinking but I had the time to devote to it. Both of my children have since married and now my 5 grandchilren are in their late teens and it's been a treasure to see them grow and become more independent. I wish you and your wife peace and contentment my friend.

[@Maritimer]

Nice story Dave, I Hope she keeps fighting !

[@davidsoderberg8726]

@@niemi5858 I appreciate you sharing your story with me and your kind words of support. We were told only 8% make it past one year and no one makes it past three years. We chose to attack this head on, keep positive and enjoy each day we are able to share together. As you know, it is a tough road, filled with fear, anger, pain, sleepless nights and many questions without answers. Our youngest daughter is 11 and she is who we are most concerned about. I am amazed how she keeps a brave face in front of her Mom, it both makes me proud and brings tears to my eyes. Our eldest daughter is turning 27 and we have three grandchildren with another on the way. I don't know what the future will bring, but I will be with her every step of the way. I am sorry for your loss and glad you were able to persevere for your sake and the sake of you children and now grandchildren. Thank you again for sharing your story. I know too many of us go through this, but sometimes you just feel alone and it is nice to hear there is hope on the other side. - Dave

[@davidsoderberg8726]

@@Maritimer Thank you for kind words, I appreciate it!

[@doxiechick7277]

David Soderberg David - You may want to research "Hallelujah Acres BARLEY GRASS POWDER". No matter what the health issue is, Barley Grass Powder cleans the bloodstream. Disease cannot live in clean blood.

[@mmabagain]

Together 40 years and married 37. She was 16 and I was almost 19 when we met in '79. Still together and loving it.

[@LeutnantJoker]

I envy you. I'm 40 years old... so far no luck. Only heartbreak and betrayal.

[@lisabradford8180]

@@LeutnantJoker ditto👎

[@scott1713]

@@LeutnantJoker maybe you and Lisa bradford should talk

[@scott1713]

@@lisabradford8180 how about Lt?

[@crazypeoplearoundtheworld304]

You have to be a faithful person, and take care of your spouse instead of thinking they're going to be all about you. Two people who serve each other make great partners.

[@joshmin68]

"Marry the right woman and stay married". That's a pretty damn good advice there. Been married for 25 years and it wasn't smooth sailing, which I'm to be blamed most of the time. I truly owed it to my other half who has been with me through all the ups and down. God bless her.

[@dianefutcher7166]

Hope your changing for the better. It’s a lot better to be happy 😊 n bright.

[@NCrdwlf]

My wife and I are 54 and we've only been married about ten years , first time for both of us. Because we got married later in life I think that we had a different agenda than younger people. My grandfather told me when I was young to make sure you marry your best friend . It always stuck with me . I waited for that.

[@promolessstructure2257]

That is something beautiful to hear it in my head when I read your comment. So that's mean there is still a chance for me also... I'm 38 and also waiting fo that ONE!

[@BogoEN]

This is an inspiring comment. Not quite in my 40s but you can start to worry. Thanks for posting

[@gord9677]

Married to the same sweet lady for 51 years this year.

[@deedavis9511]

Can’t be! Shawn is 49.

[@dpeter6396]

52 years here.

[@quarteracreadventures855]

Awww...

[@vltruan]

You’re very lucky, that’s extremely rare these days.

[@carasmussen27]

almost 24 years for us.

[@sixhourdrivemusic]

My father passed away a few years ago, but as a young man, I really appreciate your words Shawn. Thanks so much for that moment.

[@sherri5303]

Of Castles and Sand Nice to know young people are watching this wholesome show. Real life.

[@lizoriginale]

Noice Choice

[@assocrec]

If you think the grass is greener on the other side, water and feed your grass and get ready to be amazed!

[@barbibutton9619]

Beautiful

[@Free-bt6gn]

That should be on pillows and Tshirts!

[@thomaspayne6866]

People who think the grass is greener on the other side will continue to look for greener grass. It’ll never end, and that’s what you call a feminine, or matriarchal mindset.

[@Jen-fd1dx]

UrbanExplorer1000 He’s saying instead of Divorcing and starting over with someone else thinking it will be better, Instead work on your marriage to make it better. The grass isn’t always green on the other side.

[@charlotteskiftun753]

Smart

[@newy8690]

I am a guy, 22 yr old. And this is my favorite channel on KZbin.

[@Daniel-dw8jc]

same here, bro

[@LOLLYPOPPE]

Why do you think people would care about your age though?

[@jesusismykinghallelujah5303]

@@LOLLYPOPPE Shawn said in the beginning he wasn't sure of the demographics of WHO is watching this channel. I also think it's GREAT that a young man is watching Shawn's channels, learning a trade, taking advice, etc. If you see a comment above, a young man's Dad passed away and he appreciates Shawn's advice. So I believe Shawn is doing a great service here and I'm a 50 yr old woman who has watched almost since day one. Happy trails!

[@01splitpea]

Mine, too. Sean James is a wise man. A TED Talks called, "The Paradox of Choice" will help explain why dating can be so disheartening. Still, there are, and will always be, good people who desire love and lifetime commitment. Be a quality person and you'll attract quality people. Ask yourself, "If I knew in advance that this person I love would have serious health problems for the remainder of our married life, would I still want to marry him/her?" Hint, the answer should be, "yes." It's better to spend life alone, than to be saddled with an ill-fitting partner. Don't compromise. I assure you you'll reap the benefits for the rest of your life. All the best, O

[@lizoriginale]

NOICE CHOICE

[@sandischmidt5028]

Shawn, you seem to be the ‘dream man’ that a lot of women dreamed of finding in their life. My first husband was very abusive and wanted me to abort our son. Long story short, I had my son and got divorced. I’ve now been with my husband for almost 20 years and married for going on 15 years. Life hasn’t been real easy in this marriage but we stick with it and keep forging ahead. I’m so happy that you and your wife will be together once again and I pray that you two have a long and happy life together. Bless you!

[@winterishere9828]

Good on you sandi, glad you had your son. Always choose life, life = hope.

[@frentzenchandra3038]

Abortion is so cruel, don't do that, that is so cruel child murder, if you do that you can be curse by God, chid is blessing to us, Examination 28 Bless and curse, in psalm 127 ( Holy bible ) 📘 📖 ⛪🌹

[@frentzenchandra3038]

Children is blessing to us 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 👨‍👩‍👧‍👧

[@bearschmidt3180]

Hello fellow Schmidt 👋

[@kevincerce5056]

Shawn, I was fortunate to meet the love of my life when in 1973, Married in 1975. I was twenty, my wife nineteen. On February 16th we celebrate our 44th wedding anniversary. It's hard for us to believe how fast time flies. We have three sons, two of them married. To date, we have four grandchildren. Two granddaughters and two grandsons. Our second granddaughter was born on 12/29/2018. Our middles son's first child. Loving life, love my wife and family.

[@heatherwatson8273]

To everyone who is just starting in a relationship, remember that "love" is not all about sex. You need to become best friends with your person of choice, not only does friendship make your marriage strong but it also keeps you together when the children are grown up and gone, remember you won't always be a family, in time it will return to just the two of you. I'm 60 years old, my husband of 40 years is 67, but he has had 10 heart attaches his first was in 2006 and I have had 2 different types of cancer 3 times, the first was in 2005, After our two children grew up and left home I told him "well it's just you and me again just like all those years ago when we first started out back in 1979". Because of his heart medication we can no longer have sex but our relationship is still strong because we are great friends.

[@enesmazlum6033]

I´m sorry but today this seems impossible. You ever heard of this term: Mr. Friendzone. Thats the way a guy is going today with this attitude. I like your views and believe me I tried to find a girl to marry, but I never found one, because this kind of character looks unattractive, no adventure, no short term relationship, no fun so they just think "get lost idiot, I want that later when I am 35+." In highschool I never wanted to sleep around, even when girls offered that to me. Nearly everyone took their advantage of that and later they left eachother alone like nothing happened. There were no strong relationships, just a bunch of people who want to have drugs & fun. In college it was not better, it was worse and so I stopped going to dates.

[@heatherwatson8273]

@@enesmazlum6033 I'm sorry this has happened to you, we are all told to get married and have children, but it doesn't always work which is why there's so many divorces. I've always believed that there isn't someone for everyone, some times you're better off on your own, that's better than being with the wrong person. My advice to you is to join a club, like metal detecting, yoga, meditation, exercise classes,fishing, boating whatever you have thought "I'd like to do that one day" by getting out and making the effort to be part of the community, you will grow as a person and become more interesting as a person, you will have others to be with and talk to, instead of sitting at home alone, and you will become more relaxed within yourself and as you mellow you will become more interesting to other people, not just the ladies but also to your friends and family. Go on go join a club and make some new friends and make the effort to turn up and take part in what everyone's doing.

[@johnboy6594]

You are blessed

[@DanielDavies-StellularNebulla]

@@heatherwatson8273 True words of wisdom, thank you for taking the time to share 😊

[@UUNITEE]

So True ❤️👌

[@joehaleyquesnel9985]

I'm 35 years old and I've been married for 7 years. There's a difference between sleeping with someone and sleeping with someone you love. I love you ain't no pick-up line, always stay humble and kind!

[@ashokla849]

Joe & Haley Quesnel I’m right there with you I’m 36 been married for 7 years great advice.

[@FRMHEVN]

💯

[@allyoop8879]

I am 91 and still married to the same woman after 60 years. BTW, old age is not for sissies. LOL.

[@glennhess6897]

Just retired this year, and happiest I have been in twenty years. Military life is tough. I admire Canadians for their toughness.

[@fs9175]

72 and she and me clicked 50 a month ago. Wouldn't have it any other way.

[@mariansmith7694]

True

[@NoNameNo.5]

Way to go ol timers

[@celestecredle2661]

Heck yeah! I KNOW that's right!

[@Historelic]

Commitment and fidelity is such a rarity in this age and time

[@lizoriginale]

No way........... But if you're right. its only because Male birth control is IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND. Dont believe me....... But even a broken clock is right.... twice a day BWAAAAHAHA

[@loulinaz3770]

And mutual respect

[@jcsrst]

I never had a partner and had to work my ass off to achieve everything I have. I am 55 now and all of my friends of the same age are now divorced and lost half of what they had. I don't know which is worse to do it all alone, or do it with someone else and then lose half. I am very happy in my life and proud of what I've been able to achieve on my own. It would have been great to have someone to help though.... You are very fortunate and I would say one of the lucky few!

[@marianfrances4959]

she said the same thing.

[@marybradshaw4683]

.

[@AllFather-TheStoicGod]

*Excellent decision made on your part!*

[@SlappyG]

jcsrst ... 40’s here and I’m seeing the same things.

[@speteydog2260]

jcsrst agree w you!

[@financialadvisor1000]

Shawn James: You are a blessing to the world. Canada should be proud. Your upbringing was clearly done right.

[@Catherine.johnson12]

Brought me to tears... Something I needed to hear today.

[@kelliintexas3575]

Pray and give it to God. Helps ALOT.

[@sherri5303]

Catherine Hicks Bless you Catherine.

[@lizoriginale]

@Major Thakur Poor syntax

[@mywildholm]

Life can be hard... don't give up

[@AMAli-ct5df]

Cate

[@tubeviewer57]

I’m 62 and will be celebrating 45 years of marriage this August...it takes commitment for sure!

[@janettebarker4965]

46 years married this year. Still in love.

[@hellshade2]

that is a wonderful thing!

[@sosteve9113]

congratulations from a belgian bushcrafter

[@durwoodeverett9202]

Congratulations and God bless you both all the way from Alabama

[@058467]

That's awesome Janette! Still in love even more awesome! Congrats!!!

[@malina1239]

Janette Barker how do you do that🥺 I only find men who cheat or hit me or mentally abuse me. I haven’t as much as had a coffee date in five years. I’m still young and a single mum, I don’t want to involve men who are not serious in my daughters life. She comes first. But it’s so hard financially to make it on my own, I have a house. But I don’t always have money for food .. I don’t even know where to meet real men😔

[@wendymorris645]

In April I will have been married for 50 years.

[@lloydnielsen8035]

Wendy Morris congratulations. Have a good celebration on your Golden Anniversary come October 8 me and my old woman lol we will be married for 42 years

[@hirokowoods4421]

Wendy Morris congratulations!👍👍👍💕💕💕

[@sosteve9113]

congratulations

[@mrcsepel4321]

Someone win someone lose

[@sandyjuntunen4088]

Congratulations! You re very blessed.

[@ma-burke]

When today's #1 trending video is "break up with your girlfriend, I'm bored" - I think it's fair to say, an emotionally provocative song targeted at generation Z - your message of fidelity is invaluable, Shawn. Thank you for spreading your ethos with us.

[@riflemanslament9594]

@SørenCast Z its true man :(

[@jasonsands8943]

I'm 56 and married to my first and only wife of 28 years. She and I could have called it quits over several hard seasons in life, but it only made us stronger to stay together

[@metricdeep8856]

Won't happen if only one wants it. Cheers to you both.

[@hjvdb6829]

Only got married when i was 30 had to grow and learn to love and be content with myself , because i was on my own for so long i got to know myself very well only when i got to the point where i was happy with me did i meet the right woman . if i can give your daughters some advice find men that are mature and can communicate there feelings good or bad even if it hurts the other person be honest how you feel at all times, and always be willing to work on yourself both sides need to be willing to work on problems that arise and there will always be problems, that is the difference between couples that stay married and those who dont.

[@ThomsSimpleLife]

As a senior citizen, I concur with the statement that the younger generation tends to shy away from long term relationship. My wife and I have been married for 46 years, certainly not without our "bumps in the road" but it takes a commitment from both of us to make things work. I'll say this, the longer we are together, the better friends we've become. Great message Shawn.

[@243wayne1]

*MGTOW*

[@ProudBerliozian]

This is the finest pre-Valentine’s Day message ever. You both are a great example of working as a team: a couple that is there 100% for each other. May your lives of happiness last forever together.

[@jodyfriesen5037]

Ouch. This post hit a tender spot with me. I had that life partner (married just shy of 26 years). Unfortunately he walked out the door for his morning run 7 years ago and never came home. Massive heart attack at 51. I was 49 at the time. Loving, devoted, hardworking, great father and healthy ...or so we thought. I miss having that one person who has my back , whether it be emotionally or financially . I've made it work financially because I've always been practical but I'm still a work in progress on that other part. I've been building my own cabin walls , so to speak...around myself. I know one day I will have to tear them down but for right now they are staying up. Dating in your 50's is just plain weird. Been there, done that. Did you know the divorce rate for 2nd marriages is 70%?That's kind of scary. Anyway....the culture certainly has changed. The majority of young people just don't want to make sacrifices. Maybe that's partly our fault for giving them too much. Who knows. Gotta have the newest, best cell phone , mani/pedis ,hair extensions, 50 inch TV, trips, nice cars , dinners out etc. Makes saving for a house really hard. lol Debt doesn't seem to bother them until it tears their relationships apart. I could go on. But I won't. Just want to say I enjoy your videos. Hope the weather cuts you a break soon so you can finish that sauna/bathhouse for your wife.

[@TheBreamer999]

I think Jody Canadians don't realize there are more affordable places to live. Here in PEI we have many older retirees coming here. Selling their 800k houses in Toronto, or Ottawa and settling on the East Coast, where it is more affordable. I left Ottawa in 1997 and moved to PEI. I started as an I.T consultant with Veterans Affairs. Housing has increased here but I ended up buying 1.8 acres for 7200 in 1998, had a log home built and my cost of living is next to nothing. So in short...Consider getting out of the more expensive areas

[@jodyfriesen5037]

@@TheBreamer999 I realize it is cheaper in the East and the North but I am cold enough here in Southern Ontario, thanks. lol I also have one bird who hasn't flown the coop yet and am the closest sibling to an aging Mother so picking up and moving is not something I would do at the moment.

[@1954BJohn]

@Jody 'The majority of young people just don't want to make sacrifices'...that has been my experience.....

[@Pete_YT]

Young people not having the same opportunities because they overspend is a fallacy. Fact is, if you were born in the 60s/70s you were 90% more likely to do better financially than your parents, whereas those born in 80s/90s are 50% more likely. It does vary depending on where you are in the world but this is true for most of the west

[@TheBreamer999]

@@jodyfriesen5037 Understood. I went through the last five years with my mother in Cornwall, Ontaio and me in PEI. She had Dementia and it took me over four years to finally get her into long term care. She finally passed away in 2016.

[@rabbitslippers]

I’m so happy that you have someone special in your life and are happily married. I’m 54 years old and still looking for that. It seems that if you don’t find someone in your 20s… You end up with nothing but social rejects left over. Very sad. I’m a Christian who, even though my parents had a horrible marriage, I believe that marriage can be beautiful if two people are willing to work at it. I live in Ohio and I’m still looking for that special someone. I love your videos and I could sit and watch you build things every day! Woodworking is so cool! You have such a gift!

[@katec9893]

I understand how you feel but thinking of them all as social rejects won't be helping. There will absolutely be good men out there looking for a partner who haven't met the right person. I know a nice couple who met through a church and got married for the first time in their 50s.

[@davidbernard7256]

I believe you hit the nail on the head Tina. If you don't marry in yr 20's or 30's all you seem to meet are people with real problems in their lives. Best to look for someone that is travelling on the same road as you in life.

[@paulmackay2176]

I'm 51 Tina. Never married. Lone travelling wolf I suppose. Maybe a great women out there? When you least expect it...magical things happen.

[@kerrymetzger5432]

Shawn, you are a breath of fresh air. I’m so pleased for you and your family....your mindset which puts your wife and daughters first is brilliant . You are a good man. God, if anyone deserves to live the dream, it’s you. How blessed your three girls are, your wife being #1 girl...Prayers and warm regards. Oh, sorry...Callie, your #4

[@heru-deshet359]

My soul mate and I have been together 33 years. We've been trough a lot. She has had health issues , a stroke and I'm fighting cancer. Our love keeps us strong and looking forward to many more years together with God's grace.

[@robertmclennan5310]

Being married to your BEST Friend is priceless! We married young at both 19. Had a fantastic life together for 42 years. She past at 61 some 8 years ago. For most of my working life before starting my own company I worked two jobs. I am a Mechanical Engineer and also a Journeyman Tool Maker. The 2nd job went directly into saving. That gave us a fantastic nest egg to purchase a home or new car at will. Like everything it takes work. Staying together is not easy and it is give and take by both partners.

[@OrbitalDeathRay]

Bless you, sir.

[@ginahaley3866]

Thank you for sharing your story. So sorry for your loss. I hope you don't give up on loving again.

[@donaldmiller8629]

@ Robert McLennan , With most marriages it is give by the man and take by the woman.

[@senorrefresco4141]

Donald Miller a little jaded Donald? Why interrupt his heartfelt story with your negativity? You don’t know his story. Maybe the wife was raising the kids while he was working extra. Here’s the bottom line: there are shitty wives, and there are shitty husbands too. (A had an uncle who was a cheating, deceptive asshole.)

[@CarolynsRVLife]

Marriage is work. Too many people don't want to put the work in, when things get tough, they bail. :-( Good talk here. I think it'll help a lot of people.,

[@goldstein10493]

Mostly women, cus men do all the work already.

[@Sandman60077]

I disagree, I believe if you're with the right person then it won't be work at all, and it definitely shouldn't feel like work.

[@karinryan9603]

5 as0780

[@RoyalCountessUn0]

Your telling the truth.

[@NobleSteed00]

yeah, it will help a lot of people to step into divorce rape.

[@alexf800]

Social media and instant gratification and the extreme levels of distraction along with no appreciation for the good and real things is the issue. People don’t value and appreciate one another. Everything including people are disposable. How one was raised is a huge indication of how they treat people and potential partners.

[@juliajohnson5276]

Shawn, You missed your other calling, a “life coach.” So many good points with this video concerning marriage and picking a good life partner......kudos to you and your wife......

[@delberthaught1224]

Julia Johnson ww x

[@venven24]

I agree. Shawn, you would make a great life coach, especially for troubled teens/young adults.

[@wagonmaster1974]

When I clicked on the first video of yours that I watched, Shawn, you were a foregone conclusion. Great, I thought, another greenie going to preach about living free. How wrong was I. At this point, I look forward to your videos for a multitude of reasons. The videography and scenes are spectacular. The atmosphere is laid back and relaxing. Your level of tenacity is inspiring. All of that being said, the main reason I check out your videos is it is like hearing from a friend. You know, the one you haven't yet met. Keep 'em coming, man. You satisfy on levels you probably don't even fathom.

[@barbibutton9619]

Well said. Agreed

[@FRMHEVN]

💕💯

[@truenorthstrongfree8566]

@@FRMHEVN Words of wisdom. well said wagon slayer ;---() :---( ) :---( )

[@rickmoro705]

Shawn this is so ironic for me today 28 years ago was my first date with my wife I could not agree with you more on all fronts I did not get married till I was 33 I had doubt as well but in the long run it was perfect! I look back on previous relations I know none of them would of worked out long term I moved 1500 miles to better myself and in the process I met my wife Lori of 26 years love is a wonderful thing when it happens but beyond that it is deep rooted respect for each other that is the key for longevity in a marriage I believe we worked hard planed a course of action stuck to it over the years and we are now 100% debt free every thing is paid for house vehicles comes down to self respect and respect for your partner Love is the vehicle.... Respect is the key....!

[@jcsnyman6915]

Hi I'm married to my wife for 26 year's and still in love with her. I also enjoy your videos. Greetings from south africa😁

[@patriciachuchian1255]

After 70 years the conclusion I have come to is Never marry anyone who needs you...….someone who wants to be with you is much more important.

[@sunbulah9779]

I disagree. The problem is women just want a man in their lives rather than need. The woman has to need the man in her life. She needs to depend on him. That’s the only way to make things right again. The woman has to need the man not just want him. I can’t stress that enough. Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah (God) has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth

[@thomaspayne6866]

Sunbulah -- Everything you typed is correct. That’s a patriarchal society you’re advocating for, and also a society Christianity/Catholicism wants us to have. A patriarchal society will take western society out of destructive chaos, and back into order.

[@thomaspayne6866]

Razi Khan -- she’s against pair-bonding (marriage). Wants & desires always change, so divorce is likely under that chaotic feminist mindset.

[@autumnspring6624]

Patricia Chuchian Absolutely. But how to find that out?

[@Vercippu]

I think it's also important to need other other half. Not to an extent that you are desperate, but needing each other is not a bad thing in my opinion.

[@ronalrocco4922]

excellent...the man outdoes the minister with life-learned advice and common sense. I'm sure all who listened took your advice to heart.

[@amythomas1124]

I’m 59, my husband is 65. We were married 30 years this past July 14th, 2020. I’m staying in Iowa with my Dad right now, and my husband is 19 miles away in Illinois at our residence. I took care of my Mom also when she was alive. My Dad is 86 years old. My husband is still working his job of 31 years. We’re making this work for now, but since we’re both from Iowa originally, my husband and I. We’re selling our home and looking for a house to retire in southeast Iowa. Rent is horrible here too. My husband and I have a wonderful marriage.

[@AnUnknownGoddess]

If you are lucky enough to find that person. To many it's a fantasy. You are one of the lucky ones.

[@ChrisProuse]

Well said Shawn! The best advice I ever got while growing up is that love looks through a telescope, and hate looks through a microscope. If you worry too much about all the little details, you’ll miss the stars :)

[@CarolynsRVLife]

I love that advice! It's so true.

[@jamesross2373]

I got married at 23 (now 27) and it was the best thing we ever did for ourselves and our finances. We own our house and also bought a 2.5 acre lot of land which we've since sold for a nice profit. Marriage with the right person provides foundation for many things in life and encourages planning for the future and getting yourself in order. From what I'm seeing with a lot of the guys my age who aren't married, the gender debate/war has become pretty nasty and feminism is morphing into an anti-men movement, or at least that's how a lot of young guys feel. Masculinity itself is now being described as toxic rather than just the behaviour of some men. It's really damaging to young men's self-esteem and is not helping young men or women to understand each other and support each other. You are what a man is meant to be Shawn. Humble, kind, loving, and supportive. Men are rarely acknowledged as such these days.

[@tommynikon2283]

You're 27....and "own our house"? Meaning....NO mortgage? Meaning it's paid off? Meaning....? Because if it's not paid off, free and clear, your age is showing. As in....naive. The BANK owns the house, holds the mortgage note. And as long as you owe, have debt....they OWN you.

[@jamesross2373]

@@tommynikon2283 No need to be rude by calling a young person naive. It's not as black and white as you own all your house or none of your house. You can own some of the house whilst the bank also owns some. The property title is in our name and we own a good chunk of our house outright and have a good net worth for our age. We have a high income and bought property of far less value than we could have. We have no credit cards and are putting money into savings. We only buy cheap cars with cash. If people only bought houses they could afford outright with cash, then barely any of the population would ever own anything. We are aiming to be completely debt free as early as possible. If you think that's naive then maybe you shouldn't offer unwarranted financial advice on the internet.

[@Hboysoutdoors]

we need more talks like this we all need to get back to the basics

[@lizoriginale]

WERQ we do we do AND one thing that would level the genderous playing field? Male birthcontrol until Im blue in the face

[@usophiaprezens7766]

Just started watching. I love watching people building homes, maybe because... Anyway, thank you for this episode. Yes, some people don't know how to build their life, let alone their own homes. I was married for 17 years and he gave up on building our family and our home. So now i build alone and really happy to do so. Not a log cabin, but taking care of my life and my boys. Good on you for promoting togetherness.

[@mywildholm]

So sorry to hear but so glad your boys have you! Blessings to you...

[@martini1829]

I like it when you get sappy dude. Captured my English rose 20 years ago in a cross border dawn raid and brought her back to Scotland😎. She'd never go back to England now. I'd be lost without her. I wish everyone could find a soulmate like mine.

[@gbaileyo7]

You have a beautiful wife! Congrats on a happy successful marriage! I am 34 and have been married 11 years and counting with 3 beautiful health children! Because of your videos I am building our first cabin at the moment. Waiting to get off work so I can start working on finishing the inside today!

[@oceanbrzzz]

Lovely, a beautiful commentary on the value of staying married. I am blessed to have a “priceless jewel” in my supportive, funny, loving husband of almost 30 years.

[@sosteve9113]

congratulations from a belgian bushcrafter

[@chriswita9709]

I lost my wife of 20 years and at 40 I find it hard to find anyone worth dating.

[@elianaruivodeoliveira7616]

Dear God!don't give up life so beautiful and we deserve find someone.......

[@titania145]

I say the same, hard to find a man who actually wants to share his life, not just casual 'dates' 💔

[@lisabradford8180]

@@titania145 say that again, please! true facts👍

[@SP7-b5l]

Hookers. Go for hookers.

[@sanderschat]

Just go about. If love happens, it happens. If not, not. Just enjoy the sun and your love for the present moment.

[@dallas2585]

I have been blessed to be married to my best friend for 24 years. I met her when I was 17 and I am now 47! Wow, time does go so fast and it's so important to find love and enjoy as much as you can everyday. We were not able to have children, and that hurts her everyday, but we have a love together to last a lifetime. Thank you for your channel.

[@ffckode]

The problem these days is that people want to find a partner that will make them happy. However Marriage is all about making your partner happy without trying to change her/him and not the other way around. God bless you and your Marriage. Greetings from Brazil.

[@katharinanovobacki3652]

My parents was love and fight but when dad died she went 6monts later after him this was they way of love

[@joycemetheny8338]

You're a smart young man...may I introduce you to my gorgeous grandaughter....LOL

[@JaneDoe-oi5gp]

h0pper frf WOW!! That right there is probably, to a large degree, why you have a successful, happy and committed relationship!! You're a truly rare gem!

[@mrgod247]

Happiness comes from inside of you, it’s from giving your love out into the world. When you put your happiness in someone else’s hands that when things run riot.

[@flyjarrett]

I’m 42 next week, my wife and I will be married for 17 years in August. We have three boys ages 13 and 8 year-old twins. We’re very fortunate that divorce is unheard of in both of our families, including extended. That was one major criteria I had when I was looking for a spouse - divorce simply isn’t an option. I’m so glad that we’re setting the stage for my sons to learn respect and honor their future girlfriends and spouses.

[@Realmadridcelticfan31127]

37 yr old , Im scottish and my wife is from Thailand , Married 15 years . Now live in Australia. Im so lucky to have my wife . We are both committed to working at our marriage and being good parents to our three kids 8,6,3 .Marriage isnt easy , you have to work to make it work

[@tKetcham1]

That sounds horrible. Of all the friends I have, I do not have to work to make any of the relationships easy. They just are. If it becomes work to be with a woman, then what is the point? If I am in a long term relationship it is because I make her happy and she makes my day go easy. If it becomes work, then I am out.

[@sosteve9113]

congratulations from a belgian bushcrafter

[@Realmadridcelticfan31127]

@@tKetcham1 hi Tony. I probably should have explained it a bit better. By work I meant being considerate , fighting selfishness making sure I'm chipping in and taking responsibility and doing what I'm meant to be doing ( jobs around the house, getting the kids organised for school and homework) , communicating well with my wife and not just doing what I want to do all the time like spend the weekends fishing . In return I get the same back from my wife. Which brings the joy of being in a happy family and marriage. Alot of my friends divorced because they weren't willing to work at their marriage and being a parent. They just thought their wife or husband would do everything.

[@Realmadridcelticfan31127]

@@sosteve9113 thanks Steve much appreciated mate 👍

[@tKetcham1]

@@Realmadridcelticfan31127 Yhat does not sound like work to me. These re just compromises that one makes in any relationship that holds value. Whether it be with a woman, a friend, or a family member. When i think of having to work at a relationship, mean having to deal with arguments that constantly occur that are never present in relationships where there is mutual respect. I actually feel good when I am needed or asked to be there for someone I care about. I look at this as a sign that this person has counted on me because they would be there for me when the time came. This is not work at all. If you read my lengthy comment explaining my opinion on marriage, I speak about the enjoyment I get from being in, and seeing others in, long term loving relationships. i simply see no benefit to registering a successful loving relationship with the state, guaranteeing a horrible day in court if the day comes when one or both of you decide that you no longer feel the love that once brought you together. I find it much healthier to simply walk away as friends than spend years trying to recapture what has gone, or even worse ignoring that the love is gone and staying simply because years ago you made a commitment and a promise that you could have no way of knowing whether or not you could keep.| I am happy for you and James and your families, that you are able to speak about your wives as you have. I wish for you that happiness in the future, and the wisdom to leave if the day comes that you no longer feel that either of you are still receiving that joy. Good luck my friend.

[@CriticalThinker08]

my marriage of 22 years has been the best decision I've made in my life. since '98 we have been through many things including raising 2 kids of ours plus a son I had from a previous relationship. basically all my single friends are already dead from drug addiction or alcohol related issues. my family has definitely kept me from being a party animal like all my dead bros and financially we are debt free except for our mortgage. grateful for my blessings

[@barryhopesgthope686]

The wife and I have had a big part in raising our grandkids, at least the older two. The one thing the oldest granddaughter has commented is that grandma and grandpa don't fuss.

[@BeeOutdoors]

My wife and I are together for 23 years, she is my soul mate, life takes unexpected turns and so many hurdles to overcome but is you with someone that understands you as a person and you both grow together then it makes it so much easier. We have 3 beautiful kids together and built our lives together from scratch. when you young you tend to think about today and not the future but as we grow old our priority’s seem to change. As you say it seems to get more challenging for younger people but if you get the foundations right you can build anything and the most important in my opinion is a partner that will support and grow with you. Great topic great video buddy.

[@gagaullalla1256]

❤️❤️💙💙❤️❤️💙💙

[@guns4funcajanajustin]

I'm 45 my wife is 50+ we have been married for 15 years. We are in love more then the day we meet. We are very happy as you can see threw our videos. Great post Shawn wise words. Have a great weekend

[@angelabaril104]

Shawn I am 62 and alone and you are so correct the struggles are many. Thank goodness I worked very hard all my life, educated myself and made good choices. I have a home in Florida and a home in South Carolina each debt free . The bad choices I made in life was in marriages to men who were not worthy of me and what I offered. So everything you have said is 100 % true and at the age of 62 I am still waiting on Mr. Wonderful. I am a Christian and I just think one day when I least expect it we will cross paths. God bless you and your wife and children. Thank you for your channel I truly do enjoy spending time with you and Mrs. Callie, love that dog. Till next time God Bless.

[@IsitReallyrealreally]

Angela Baril did you take those ‘homes’ from the men?

[@karenm7993]

MD Ma ..no she fought hard to get them back from the so called men trying to steal them from her after she worked so hard all her life...so now what????goes both ways..that's what!

[@loreneknight9755]

There's "somebody good for everybody"...nice to hear, Shawn. Thanks 4 that sweet reminder. Love this stuff, kind sir.

[@suzannegullace965]

Been Married 23 years,my husbands parents and mine were together till they passed, divorce is not a thought for us,so sad so many marriages dont last

[@marcenepinkerton5031]

suzanne gullace especially if it is not your choice and you have done everything you can think of to make it work and they meet someone younger and leave.

[@suzannegullace965]

@@marcenepinkerton5031 Im so sorry!

[@ronalrocco4922]

still a nasty throw away, disposable society. narcissism runs deep with the me too attitude.

[@bigfatno]

Well said. I was with the perfect woman for me for 14 years, and messed it up by not being the man I needed to be. I've been single almost as long, and have determined that's the best for me. I've decided I'm not going to go out and look for a "best friend." If it happens, cool. If not, I'm OK with that too. I've wanted to state that for so long. Thank you for allowing me to open up.

[@pharris8958]

My husband and I really enjoyed this video. Blessed together for 30 years.

[@patriciabarnes6664]

Your wife is cute, Shawn. You look perfect together and how wonderful, that you've both upheld the sanctity of the marriage union. Blessings to you both.

[@lorib5323]

I am 43 and this summer will be 21 years married. Respect for yourself and your partner, though vague, is key. The very few times we fought in our marriage was either from exhaustion from babies or when one of us was insecure/frustrated about our own personal situation or expected societal role. We have two young boys 19 & 13. I stress daily the importance of bettering YOURSELF before blaming everyone/thing around you. It is hard to look in the mirror and admit that YOU are insecure, YOU are the problem, YOUR role has changed. I needed to change when my boys got older, going back to school was beyond hard. Taking a chemistry class with students my kids' age makes you feel like a failure. Again.... MY problem. Until you actually take charge of YOUR feelings you will continue to drag others down with you. Regularly take your advice and pass it on to both my boys. Thank you. :)

[@mapleleaf0]

Well said. I'd add humor to the equation, as well. Not put-down humor towards the other, but a little self-humor, so as not to take ourselves too seriously. That and willingness to apologize. The line from Love Story which is quoted so often is so wrong, "Love means never having to say you're sorry." It's the opposite. Love means saying you're sorry and meaning it!

[@doxiechick7277]

Lori Bonicelli Wow. Your message is so meaningful, and powerful.

[@VL1975]

I am 44 and have never been married.

[@johnboy6594]

27 years and never been happier. My 23 old twin girls are a gift from God.

[@okidot]

Very humbled about what you said regarding helping younger men. I'm in my mid 30's, from Ireland, and the cost of houses and mortgages are very high, so building on land in the countryside seems to be the only option. I found your self reliance channel, and was thoroughly amazed with your abilities and perseverance. Such an inspiration!

[@yogibear5649]

You have more power than you realize brother.

[@1954BJohn]

There's a lot of truth in what you say Shawn.I'm speaking from a stance of being married, to the same person, for 43 years. I was 22 and my wife was 21 when got our first mortgage....young and naive. The interest rate was 17.5% and we had no furniture...we worked hard collectively....There was more than one occasion when we thought what the hell had we done....but we survived, though hard work and a total focus....went without many times...By the time we were 36 we work hard and moved to a larger property mortgage free. Where we 'part ways' is when you stated it's harder for today's younger generation....I don't accept that.....the trouble as I see it is that today's young generation DO NOT want to make sacrifices i.e. go without...they still want the iphone's, holiday's, new leased car's etc....Alas, imho, the REAL culprits are their parents.

[@nancyhadden1135]

I get where you’re coming from. Very similar to ours. However, I don’t totally agree with the second portion. My daughter has grown up in a Christian home, has a great work ethic, and totally supports herself with the bare minimums. She cannot find a ‘decent’ guy that doesn’t want to bed her right away, or have her run him around in her car, or have her pay for dinner. I’d like to know where respectful, honest, caring MEN are, because I have seen very few these days.

[@mindyvaughn8217]

Nancy Hadden A Christian college or business maybe? Often times large churches “Church of the Highlands”, “First Baptist Atlanta”, I believe these are the only type of venues where a young man of quality might be. 💖

[@1954BJohn]

@@nancyhadden1135 - my 'second portion' relates to my own experiences, both regarding family and close friends....Here in the UK 'The number of young adults living with their parents has reached an all-time high, with more than a quarter of people aged 20 to 34 still living at home'. That is despite the many opportunities education wise to get on and get better jobs, therefore better wages.....Parents think they are helping, but in reality they are not - we all need to stand on our own two feet and make our way through the world...

[@NixonBushcraft]

Shawn James is a true life coach, and the best thing is, he gives his advice for free🙂

[@Cyndy101]

And he gives great advice! 😉😊

[@mindyvaughn8217]

Nixon Bushcraft Amen

[@strykerist]

Right?? He’s spot-on with balance and wisdom. I’m 50, I know a few things myself, but i can’t even begin to put into words how much I get out of these videos.

[@bevtrue6937]

Maaybe #1? Oooh, you're in trouble!! Haha. Too many guys out there are jerks, that is why marriages aren't happening and/or are breaking up. I am 73 and have been in a lot of relationships that i eventually gave up on. Waaay too hard to make it on your own. If i had stayed married, i know i would be much better off in retired life, but peace of mind is better, than extra finances. Too many men looking to leach off a woman, freeloaders. Phooey. Who needs it? Nope.

[@artistaloca4]

@@bevtrue6937 "Phooey?" Lol- I haven't heard that in forever. Maybe your heart will open again; you never know who's comin' down the pike! 😉

[@paulasousa819]

i am 57 and have been married for 36 years

[@b.abernathy7980]

We've been married 50 years and still counting. Best move we ever made!

[@lisajohnston6422]

When I first started watching your videos I thought to myself "there is no way this man is single!!!". I continued watching both channels and found videos of your beautiful family. You have been very blessed!

[@lynneproudfoot3624]

Thank You , for showing what it takes to stay together . Guys need this talk from a man in a family. GUYS, LISTEN TO JAMES! Girls You are not Princesses. Grow up all of you.

[@davidcloutier6771]

I have always appreciated your videos, but now I am learning more about you as a person and your values. I watch selective you tube channels and of course this is one of them. I now realize what keeps me coming back to see what you are up to and the thoughts that you share. With three children and a wife of 22 years I have applied to my life many things of which you have mentioned, but like you said many have not and it is more prevalent these days. Thanks Shawn for just being a good man. I try every day to be a better person. Also noted your library list in a different video moments ago and must agree Tipping Point and Outliers explains the human element in a way that many would never understand without reading. Good on you Shawn! Have a great day!

[@mindyvaughn8217]

David Cloutier Which video is his booklist in? Please

[@davidcloutier6771]

@@mindyvaughn8217 It was a video posted 2 months ago titled "How I Stay Motivated" kzbin.info?v=93ZL2xWKucc&event=video_description&redir_token=BVBhx2Hjr8k06IloTa0SdVuXRE98MTU0OTgxNDc1N0AxNTQ5NzI4MzU3&q=https%3A%2F%2Fmyselfreliance.com%2Fself-reliance-book-library%2F

[@meemee48larue22]

So glad it's going well for you and your wife. I thought I had my life partner/best friend, but after 26yrs out of nowhere he came home and said he was unhappy. He left and married someone younger. It was VERY hurtfull. Sometimes no matter how hard you try, it just not meant to be. I wish you all the happiness in the world. 15yrs later I am still single and doing well. I guess GOD has different plans for all of us. Best to you and your family. ❤🌹👌👍

[@TheeAthis]

: (

[@blahblahblah1988]

My husband I are going on 16 years this year. Met him at 17 & am now almost 33. I’m so grateful that my husband and I both had good examples of commitment. I will do everything in my power to do the same for my children. Marriage and raising children teach you things and push you to grow in ways that you cannot learn anywhere else. Your points about finances are so true and important as well. It’s great to see people speaking on these topics.

[@jennifer6198]

Solo. Finally have peace. No drama. Calm, balanced & happy

[@standswithfish]

Married 37 years to my best friend. Too many enter relationships with the idea that if it don't work out we can just go our separate ways. Our faith and the good example of my folks taught us the value of a lasting commitment and lifetime partnership. Dad was asked how two people stay together for so long (63 years). His answer? "We had no plan 'B'"!

[@lizoriginale]

"I would rather die alone" because its a quote from Bukowski aka Plan B?

[@MC-oi2pb]

This was really important for me to hear, Shawn. I've been crushing pretty hard on a girl who isn't really suitable for a life partner, and now that I've watched your video, it has really made me think about where my priorities are at. I have thought about it and recognize that she isn't right for me, and I will continue to search for a woman who is not just physically attractive, but all-around supportive, intelligent, and helpful. You have great advice to give, Mr. James.

[@Deutschland-Uganda-Ungarn]

I wish I can find a man like you! It is very hard in our age (50) find again a new and healthy love! I wish you and your wife a woderful life! 💞

[@LeesaGio]

Jutta I am also looking for someone worthy of my love ,commitment, understanding, etc.... Willing to stay alone. But, snuggling is also nice ,especially on a cold winter's evening. Best of luck to you ! Hugs

[@normaortiz922]

You took the words from my mouth...

[@scasey1960]

Aside from fertility, what do women bring to the table? Men age like wine; women like milk.

[@katec9893]

@@scasey1960 See this kind of sexist and cruel attitude is part of the problem today. Both men and women can bring love, friendship, companionship, fun, commitment, fidelity and lots more to a relationship. It's not all about looks, sex and fertility. It's also untrue that men age better. I'd say men and women age roughly equally, it's more about health and if they continue to look after their mental and physical health. I hope you mature and get a healthier perspective on women.

[@brianberezowski5352]

Sir, YOU hit the nail right on the HEAD when you commitmented on "Self Improvement". "SELF IMPROVEMENT" on any and ALL levels IS the definition of self love. SELF IMPROVEMENT is a LIFE LONG "JOURNEY". By improving ones self, all the people around you (your loved ones) BENEFIT. It up lifts them and inspires them to do better. All GOOD! A big THANK YOU for all your videos. They are INSPIRING, ENTERTAINING and most importantly ... EDUCATIONAL!! Stay safe, stay healthy. RESPECTFULLY Brian From Thunder Bay, Ontario Canada.

[@jbaby8188]

Shawn, by you living your best life, by you being true to who you are. You are automatically liberating others to do the same. I must say the experience of "you" is so refreshing. It makes my heart smile. May God bless you always.

[@dwjbakpaker]

My wife and I have been married for 54 years. It has not always been easy but always worth it

[@sosteve9113]

congratulations from a belgian bushcrafter

[@dewbottle]

36 years for me and my husband, give and take ! Share everything and talk !

[@kimperes5987]

I respect you and your wife tremendously, Mr. James. Those drone shots are spectacular! I knew she has been helpful behind the scenes in your wonderful endeavor. Your comments don't sound sappy to me. They sound endearing, sincere and heartfelt!This is unrelated but if I were watching one of my BF Sasquatch videos, the crack sound at 5:30 would've been attributed to a forest cousin doing a wood knock. 🙄 Shawn, I've been watching your vids since 2017 and your resourcefulness and kindness restores my faith in men.

[@kskitchen-fw7uy]

Thank you for saying what needs to be said. I wish I had heard this when I was young. We've made it work and are blessed to be married over ten years

[@franmartinez779]

I would love to find a partner who values marriage.

[@coolwater55]

Fran Martinez Be a person who goes in circles with those who value marriage, that person will come.

[@franmartinez779]

@@coolwater55 it's just not meant to be for me..😔

[@coolwater55]

Fran Martinez Don’t give up!

[@franmartinez779]

@@coolwater55 I haven't it's just not easy once you hit 55 and up, most people are married or settled down with someone..plus the older we get...people have baggage kids grandkids etcetera. T.y. for stting a great example.😊👍

[@SanKissJuice]

Fran Martinez Me too

[@jeannecoppola3893]

What a perfect Valentines message for your wife and viewers!

[@peterbernier9624]

Finally we have met the mystery lady and thank you for sharing. Mystery lady, thank you for your courage for being in front of the camera. Hope we see you more often. Great channel Sean, enoy it every evening.

[@OregonMikeH]

How can anything be sappy when it's Humble, Wise and Beautiful! Best of 2 Ch. on Y.T & You know what the 2nd one is .. MSR!

[@OutWestHomestead]

watched this the other night and sounds pretty much on target, like all of your videos and the way you try things yourself. We have been married since feb 14 of 1970 and still like being around each other and work and play together. we try to do most things ourselves , but getting older takes it slows a person down. you show many good hints and ways to build. Thanks for all the great videos.

[@beartrackwoods4720]

Hi Shawn! I am Abraham. First and most I respect and admire what you doing. You are pursuing your dreams and goals. I am reaching my fifties and I have been in the mountains, hike, rappel, and many more. I think you are a hard worker simple and honest man. I think building off-grid is something my wife and I have thought about quite a few times. Thank you for sharing your journey and your beautiful family with us. Very respectfully, Abraham

[@joannej_Youtube]

Great video Shawn! 👍 I have something to add, which may not be for everyone, but is a smart financial move: Don't have a big, traditional wedding, especially if you have to go into debt to do so. Most weddings are about the same price as a down payment for a home. I suggest either getting married at City Hall (which I did 😁) and having a celebration party at someone's home, or having the ceremony and party together, again, at someone's home. I eloped, and my friends, coworkers and family still threw me bridal showers. Most people are getting married in their late 20s or early 30s, and don't need the traditional wedding gifts.

[@ibrockinrobin67]

I agree. We just had a very beautiful wedding for my son and DIL a few months ago. Gazebo in a beautiful park. Under $1000. Rented a beautiful dress and a good friend took all the photos. A wedding isn't a status statement, it's a union of two people who love each other. Going in to debt for it just seems wrong. This is all great advice.

[@bevtrue6937]

Way good advice. Weddings are a crazy waste of money. I got married twice but never had a wedding, not even a fancy party, but no huge debt either.

[@joannej_Youtube]

@@ibrockinrobin67 That sounds AMAZING and even more special than the usual wedding hall rental space. Those type of weddings are also so much fun for guests, too!

[@joannej_Youtube]

@@bevtrue6937 Good for you and congrats! 👍🥂 I was maid of honour at a friend's wedding and it was a year of stress and megga expenses for all involved. The actual wedding wasn't fancy but still cost them a small fortune, and the DJ didn't show up! The food was just OK and the best part was the party they had at their house after the reception. That also turned me off ... too much time, planning, money and stress. And as a guest, my favorite weddings were the ones that got married at City Hall and had small house parties.

[@bevtrue6937]

@@joannej_KZbin 😜 Unfortunately both were divorces in the end, but at least i was smart enough not to do that again. Relationships are waaay better.

[@CC-te5zf]

34 years and counting for us. Life is a journey; share it with someone you love. I can't imagine it any other way. Thanks for the message in this video. God bless you!

[@stephenriley9084]

Shawn, Looks like you're on our path, but we are 10+ years ahead of you! So things can continue well into the future with trust, tolerance and sharing. We have been together since 1978 and have done it all together, thick and thin, compensating for each other's life chances and working it out together to build our family. We don't have anything of significance separately, financial, emotional, family. It's all in the same bucket and out in the open. We get on and humour always saves the day. Our children have both graduated during the aftermath of our business closing, which for us was an achievement in itself and hard. But together, that's all four of us we got through with frankness about what was possible. You are right, sticking together is the best financial plan. I also think that in your situation, you may want to leave a toe in the residential property market in Ontario, just in case you have to abort your plans. Once you're out it's hard to get back in. Commitment and not taking things too seriously always win the day. We say... it can only go wrong! So crack on!!! And give it a go. Anyone at any stage of life should pay attention to the message in this video as it rings very true. Tremendous once again. Regards Stephen.

[@spikester40]

As always such wise words!!! I would love to have my sweet husband back. It’s been 13 months and I still miss him as much today!! We loved doing everything together!!! We always knew we could get through anything as long as we were together!!! This journey alone is a little frightening but he helped me learn to be strong!!!

[@ShawnJames1]

My thoughts are with you. I’m very sorry for your loss

[@SweetwaterFarmPA]

Thank you Shawn, appreciate your enthusiasm not only for the outdoors and wildlife but for relationships and our marriages. Wish you the best with your new location and construction of your new Homestead. Keep up the great work. Barry

[@Kdubb815]

I'm 33, I'm a Christian man, I'm a virgin still and it's all because I haven't found a woman who shares my values. I never want divorce as being even an option. I see marriage as a holy union between a man and a woman. God gave us marriage to reflect His love for the Church and show that He'll never leave us but will keep pursuing us. I want the woman I marry to know I'll never leave her, but I want that same commitment from her (whoever she is). I appreciate you speaking on marriage and giving some good advice. Love your videos, God bless you and your family!

[@gonefishing3644]

Most people do not understand that marriage is a business partnership -- until they get divorced and have to divide the marriage's financial assets and debts. Many people do not put into the decision to marry the same level of consideration they would when deciding whether to pool financial resources and start a business partnership with another person. Many people who marry for love only know about their fiancée what that person has shown them and told them and have little information about the fiancée from other sources. How many people get married without really knowing about their spouse's financial and legal histories? Or knowing what opinions their spouse's parents and siblings hold about the spouse? You can tell a lot about a person's character and be able to predict future behavior when you know a lot about that individual's history, what other people think of that individual, how they have behaved under pressure and the choices they have made when life was not going well. But many people, especially those who marry young, only find out what their spouse is really like after the honeymoon is over and they have to work together through tough times. And that is not the time to discover your spouse does not cope well with stress, or is unreliable, or is a cheater, or is a spendthrift, or has poor temper control or is selfish. There is an old saying: Marry in haste, repent at leisure.

[@davidcadman4468]

And remember, we marry into a family, and seldom do we take into consideration the drag on a relationship, that the in laws and outlaws have. The interfering Mother In Law is a standard in comedy, but she is absolutely a reality. The old saying, a son's a son until he takes a wife, a daughter's a daughter the rest of her life, is so true.

[@gonefishing3644]

@@davidcadman4468 Very true. And new spouses often do not know how their expectations may differ about what is normal family behavior unless they have spent a lot of time staying overnight with each other's family. This experience can be really eye-opening. And some understanding about those differences can save having pointless arguments and resentment in the marriage over how people should behave.

[@bradirwin5345]

Realize that most people spend more time picking a career than a mate . The later can also cost you a life time of happiness and $1000s in legal fee's and future earnings. After 50 go for the cabin and the dog.

[@jeanblythe1595]

I have this cousin who is older than me, and he and his wife married at 21. But they'd known each other since they were 2. They have their whole lives' memories including each other. They've been married 50 years or close, had 9 kids, who have given them 26 or more grandchildren, and now they are up to great-grand children....and they still love each other. You can tell when large families were loving because the kids get married and tend to have multiple children, so it pays forward. These are wonderful people, and I know they didn't stay together because it made sense financially. They stayed for love, friendship, relationship, and then added parenting to the mix. Their family get together is epic! When you add in more of the extended family, it becomes Biblical :D My cousin's wife is one of 13, and they all could start a city....it's really amazing. There have been a very small number of divorces among the kids. And then in my family, my brother married unwisely very young--the woman he chose wasn't chosen for the right reasons. That didn't last long, and he went through quite a few relationships before he found the one he's been in for decades. Neither of his sons has married, and both have at least one child. So I've seen the best and worst of marriage. I think personally that having a happy homelife, childhood is hugely conducive to having good relationships later on. If you are a good person, and only want to marry a good person, and friendship is the basis for the spark that ignites, and you don't have the word "divorce" in your vocabulary when you do marry, and you both remain good people and keep love alive, everything about your life will be better. I hope your daughters find good men. As for your wife, I know she is a great person because you are, and you would be unhappy unequally partnered. Soulmates. :)

[@stephaniedescoteaux4759]

Investing in marriage counselling might save lots of money down the road.

[@cathyphegley7414]

I am 71 .....my first husband died of cancer at 40. Second husband was abusive so that lasted five minutes... My parents did not raise stupid! Lived alone happily for twenty years. Really never found another best friend. A good dog and a simple life. And my church family, a great community; I live in a small town in Montana with strong kind people with integrity for the most part. I believe that my relationship with the Lord, my faith, the very structure of who and why I am to begin with, gives me freedom and peace. But it didn’t come easy. I, too, struggled emotionally. Trying to live up to what the world say you should do and be is so destructive. My parents gave me a great foundation and so much love that I had the strength to keep going. Than you Shawn for your videos and sharing your life. I enjoy spending time with you and Cali and your family.

[@fongyow6583]

So sorry about abusive. Mine put me in hospital 6 times. True, we aint stupid. I tried leaving. So odd men go around thinking abusive others is acceptable..

[@karenm7993]

Fong Yow ..yup..and men whether they abuse or not wonder why women are fighting back...duh

[@doreensullivan8334]

I have only started to watch your videos for the past few weeks, but I am enjoying them very much. I am so impressed with the building skills that you exhibit. My father built two houses, many times using only hand tools as you do. I fondly remember trying to help him as a young child. However, this video really touched my heart. My husband and I have been married for 53 years. During that time we have worked together building sail boats, working on cottages and finally our own home. Then in our retirement, travelling together touring North America on a motorcycle. Together, working on projects, we have used many of the tools that you use. But more importantly, together we have raised two wonderfully strong self sufficient daughters. One is divorced but owns her own home and is in a good relationship now. She is raising a self confident, compassionate son, a wonderful teenage grandson to us. Our other daughter is also in a loving marriage. Her daughter has some special needs, but with the love that is evident in their home we know our granddaughter’s needs will all be met. My husband and I did not always have a easy time of things during our marriage. But we worked together and I think the example that we showed our daughters by resolving our problems together has made a big difference in how they deal with their relationships. Family has always come first, whether sailing, skiing, at the cottage or being at home. We are truly blessed! Four years ago, I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma, not curable but manageable with chemo. My husband has become my main caregiver. His love and patience has been put to the test these past few years. But our devotion to one another is strong. I am so grateful for the wonderful life that we have shared together. I hope your words of advice will be well taken by others. Both daughters realized that paying rent is money that is gone. Paying a mortgage at least developes some equity. They started with something affordable but that might need some work. Both have put the “elbow grease” into their investment and it has paid off. So, thank you, for sharing your thoughts. I look forward to watching all of your videos. The peace and quiet that they show is grounding. Enjoy your wonderful home in the woods. I am enjoying watching your videos.