Was Transition Worth It? | End of Gender Transition Reflection

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

USEFUL LINKS: ~ Pre-order my phalloplasty memoir: finlaygames.com/my-books/ ~ Video tour of my completed phalloplasty: ko-fi.com/s/f854c136f2 ~ Video demonstration of my implant device: ko-fi.com/s/d21d7b1b68 ~ Trans/lower surgery coaching/mentoring: finlaygames.com/mentoring-and-coaching/ ~ 'Ask Funcle Finn' a question: finlaygames.com/ask-me-anything/

[@DrKristinaRizzotto]

Beautiful, Finn. I started HRT at 23 in January 2013 (MtF) but feel like I haven’t reached even halfway what you described. Neither the passing/comfort in my body nor the inner peace/freedom from dysphoria - but I have faith that I too will one day reach the top of the mountain. It is inspiring to hear from someone on the summit. Much love from somewhere in the middle!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless your heart thank you. Its important to remember that our journeys take different amounts of time. We each have to carve a path up this mountian that works best for us. I am cheering you on from the top and can see you smiling up from the middle!

[@DrKristinaRizzotto]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you ❤️ I'm glad I came across your videos and have been enjoying hearing your takes on topics that are always on my mind.

[@quryshna]

Thank you for this. I cried a little. So glad I found your channel. I started exploring my gender around 37. And as I learned and researched and stressed and tried different things, I realized I am trans/non-binary. I will be 43 next week and I started T 2.5 months ago. And for the first time, I felt like I was finally taking care of myself. My first T shot had me crying. That euphoria was overwhelming! I felt happy. For the first time, I felt happy about being me and existing in this body. I also felt really angry that I didn't have the opportunity to explore my gender when I was younger. There's a lot of pain in that. It was like I was robbed even before I left my mum's womb. And that anger hasn't gone away yet. Always feeling broken because I hated being expected to perform the F gender at all times. Always feeling like a failure because I couldn't live up to people's expectations. I'm angry about that. Now I'm finally comfortable with myself (not entirely because I still have dysphoria with certain body parts). Comfortable with my gender. Super happy with the name I chose. Super happy with my pronouns (they/them/their). And super happy with my adorable little moustache growing in haha. In thinking of your trans mountain analogy, I hope you don't mind me adding a bit to it from my perspective. My first thought was I just started my journey in climbing that mountain. But I don't think that's the case. I started thinking about my gender around 37. And that's when I found trans mountain. That's when I started exploring if the climb was what I wanted to do and trying to find the best path for me. In realizing this, I can gently correct myself by saying that I started my journey at 37 instead of feeling like I'm just taking my first steps. I've made significant progress in climbing trans mountain. And maybe I'm somewhere around the middle. And that feels awesome! Knowing you are cheering us on from the top is a great feeling. Thank you, Finn :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

What a lovely message to find, thank you so much for sharing so much of yourself. Its so good to hear you are finding your way. I can relate so much to the anger and sadness. I have found that these feelings ebb and flow through my transition. Grieving for our lost pasts is a vital part of transition I think. I love the addition you put to the trans mountain analogy, and I completely agree. There is much groundwork that we do, that we dont often initaly recognise until we start climbing, then we see that we are actually further ahead than we thought, even if we are only 'starting the journey' in other ways. Making this video, and completing my degree, has inspired me to take cheering people on from the top, to another level. I have just launched some new services, and am now working with people as a coach and mentor, a trans mountain guide, to help people navigate this journey. Im excited to be able to work with folks in this new way! If you would like some more info, I shall link the video here. Stay in touch my friend, I would love to hear how you get on kzbin.info/www/bejne/lXPLh5qInbWZsMU

[@quryshna]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Oh sheesh lol. I just now connected "Trans Mountain Guide" with the trans mountain analogy lol. That's awesome! I will definitely be a permanent resident of your channel :) Thank you for the link. I will check it out

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

@@quryshna Ah yay! Wonderful to have you in the FinnFam!

[@jos5394]

This was a beautifully explained video and the ‘safe home’ analogy was such a great way of putting it. I really hope people who are somewhat ignorant towards the concept of transitioning watch this and learn something. It was so thorough and gently explained, which is often what’s missing from the hellfire of Twitter! 😅

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

It is my hope too, its why I speak so openly about my experience, because I hope that understanding us more, may help people to drop their predudices. Thank you so much for your kind comment

[@nate931]

Thanks Finn I have been on hrt for almost 5 months and I keep questioning whether or not I "Should" be doing this but being trans isn't something we choose it's something we are born with.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hello my friend. Questioning is part of the process, any decision we make in life, any change we make in life, we always question it ,because its unknown, so, when its something that goes against the norm, and gets so much stigma from society, of course its going to make us question even more. I found that with every passing day, with every change, with every correct gendering, every hearing my name and pronoun, my certainty became deeper and deeper. Thats how we know its right. And if it isnt right, that is OK too! Sending love

[@mannymoonstone8486]

Thank you so much. I don't know if I'll ever have the words to tell you what this means to me at this moment. So much love Finn.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless your heart .so glad that this video means so much to you! Thank you for leaving such a lovely comment!

[@lesdee7155]

You are such a inspiring and motivational person. I am not trans or LGBT but I do have anxiety and tend to self medicate. Your posts have something for everyone thank you

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I am so glad to hear that, I aim to make my content applicaple to all, regardless of identity and background, and it is great that comes accross. Thanks so much for watching, and for your kind comment!

[@maxkuzma2934]

This is a really excellent video. I love the whole perspective and the level of explanation. Really, really good.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

What a lovely comment, thank you so much!

[@sewcatable]

I would love to discuss this video with you.

[@sewcatable]

I will watch and view carefully to discuss any video or article of your choosing, Max

[@bdjarman4271]

Hi Finn. Thank you so much for speaking so articulately and compassionately about your journey. Best wishes for everything that is in your future. Much love 💜

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you for watching and for that lovely comment! Much love to you too!

[@Cecilia-rj5bh]

Your voice reminds me of a baritone singer. Makes me feel really safe. You explain things really well, and even though I am a cisgender woman, I feel like I can understand it a bit better. Of course I can never truly understand it, but I can have more knowledge of what it is, and how I can be a supporter for trans people.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I love your feedback on my voice! Thank you :) I have so many comments about my voice! Im also really glad to hear that my videos help with your understanding, having people like you as an ally means the world to me :)

[@leannadavies7440]

Im cis to love your channel

[@pierreemanuellosier8663]

Thank you Finn, I am transitioning (almost 2 yrs now, top surgery done) and your testimony gives me hope.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I am so glad to hear that as there is much hope to be had. Life will just keep getting better. Much love and strength to you!

[@kristinaswegan5927]

Thank you Finn, for everything you continue to share. I started watching your videos years ago when my oldest child came out as transgender. I wanted to learn more, how to help support him and see what he may go through. You've taught me so much and I've passed a lot of that onto him. You're such an incredible person and I am so happy for you and how far you've come in your journey!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Well that makes my day to read your comment, thank you so much. I am very glad to have helped, he is very lucky to have a mum like you! Thank you so much for your kind words, much love to you an your son, please stay in touch, I would love to know how you both get on!

[@MiaPhoenix]

This is the most enlightening experience I ever heard from another perspective. Congratulations on all you have done and what you will overcome.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much and thank you for that lovely comment!

[@walfred6412]

When you said your body isn't home I felt that 😭 I'm fighting for my top surgery after a year of setbacks and this video showed me that I can do this and I will get through it. Thank you finn, I'm glad I stumbled across this video

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Yes you will get through it, doesnt stop it being painful, but knowing there ARE better times ahead, helps us to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Im so glad you stumbled on me too, welcome to the finnfam! You can find more blogs over on my website and resources too :) finlaygames.com

[@tycopperkid7717]

Man, I am so glad that you’ve come such a long way.... you’re amazing, Finn, I’ve been following your journey only for only a few years but every single video that you upload is so true and honest and genuinely, overall, uplifting. Thanks for allowing us to experience it all with you, lots of love

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Ah my dear friend that is such a lovely compliment, thank you so much! I love thats how my videos come accross. Thanks for watching and for walking this journey with me! Much love to you!

[@guitarnation7420]

Fin you are such a treasure as a human being! What a good and loving soul you are. I myself and in the process of finally beginning "the process" of seeking phallowplasty. I've followed your channel for quite some time now and I can't tell you what a positive influence you have become in my life and the lives of so many! From your personal experiences as a trasgender man, to your wisdom and fact based discussions surrounding transition in general and phallowplasty surgery, you've been AMAZING! Thank God for you my friend. So many transgsnder men who are just beginning the process of transitioning and surgery will thankfully have your videos and more importantly YOU, to help support, nurture and keep them/ys ALL, healthy and informed. God bless you and yours always Fin. Much love. Peace. ❤

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Oh my friend that s such a lovely comment, thank you so much. It isnt always easy to be this transparent, especially concerning lower surgery, but to know it is appreciated and helpful, makes it very worthwhile. If I can be of any help with the phalloplasty exploration, do let me know. I have a book coming out next year, detailing the entire process, and I hope that will be an additional useful resource too. Feel free to pop over to my website, for more blog and to contact me should you ever need. finlaygames.com Thanks again for your kind words, means the absolute world to me!

[@kriskabin]

This is an absolutely wonderful explanation of the Transgender experience! Much needed & extremely well done 💜 A big help, 🙏😊

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much for that wonderful feedback!

[@reesehowell562]

Thank you for sharing your stories and your journey Finn! 💜💜💜 You bring so much warmth and hope for healing to the table, and I’m inspired by your recovery and self-discovery to show myself that same sort of kindness. 💜💜💜 Best wishes, Reese

[@axsirlotl4334]

I stumbled upon your channel because of your sertraline video (I'm trying to come off of it) and I'm so glad I did because the videos I've seen are so uplifting and inspirational :) lots of love xx

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Yes! That makes me incredibly happy to know that, thank you! I aim to make all my videos relatable to everyone. No mater who we are, our challenges and drives in life are universal, to be happy and fullfilled! Welcome to the FinnFam! I have a blog too, which you can find over on finlaygames.com

[@noahkealoha]

Finn, your videos are some of the most helpful and comforting resources out there. Your words on this topic are very insightful and give me optimism knowing I still have further to go to get to where I feel I'm finished with transition. I love your beautiful analogy on our bodies being our home and needing it to be a safe and stable place to be comfortable in our space. I'm really seeing that in my own life, going to a new university and living life as myself in a very stealth way and the amount of comfort I have knowing that I'm no longer trapped where I was before. Being trans is also now only a part of me that I can choose to keep to myself and not the only thing people see in me and that feels good too. I started socially transitioning in 2016 and went on T two years later and had top a year and a half ago. I'm still in the long waiting period for my gender marker and bottom surgery, but I can say too that the person I am both outside and inside is completely different. I resonate a lot with what you said about looking back on it and the profound differences wondering how you ever continued living through what you did. The pain really did outweigh any fear that came with transitioning. While it makes me sad thinking back on all I really went through, my journey has given me the ability to see the world in ways that others probably never will and makes me a very understanding and thoughtful person being only 22 years of age. The biggest thing for me right now is still fully accepting that I'm trans. I thought I have, but I still go through bouts of negative thoughts surrounding the fact that I'm trans, wishing it could have been different, and feeling inferior to others around me. Yet I'm also thankful for it, so it is conflicting, but I will say knowing there are other people out there who understand and truly get the unique struggles we go through being trans helps me feel more at home within myself. Keep being incredible, Finn, thank you for all you do for all of us searching for guidance and community.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Well your comment gave me a lump in my throat! How very kind, thank you. It really means so much to me to know that my content makes this much of a difference to peoples lives. Its so good to hear that things are improving for you, it is a tough place to be, when we arent quite where we want to be, especially with the waiting times, but acknowledging how far we have come and how different we feel, makes a world of difference. I can hear the wisdom in the approach you have to your transition. Accepting our being trans is, I think, a constant work in progress because there is still so much opposition to trans people and so much hate in the world. Loving ourselves with that backdrop is really tough. Being able to see the positives is key. Whenever something brings me down, I remember all the pluses to being trans, and that helps me to feel proud and good about who I am. Thank you so much for your lovely comment, and for sharing your wonderful story in progress with me!

[@eneedham789]

The only thing I’d add is that not all people with dysphoria are trans, and if dysphoria is mild then it can be alleviated by therapy, and transition isn’t the right answer for everyone. BUT if it’s persistent and severe then it’s very likely to be permanent, in which case transition is useful. I’m really glad it helped you (and me too)! Much love ❤️

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Very good points, thank you!

[@chrysromeo]

you're right, it's a totally new life and we're completely new people! absolutely worth it!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Absoluyely yes!

[@leonelson4704]

I'm a baby trans. I started testosterone 4 weeks ago and I can't wait to be at the point where you are.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Congrats on starting this amazing journey! Dont rush it! Time will fly by and suddenly you will find yourself 5 years on t and wonder where all the time went. You will look back at this time, as one of the most wonderful in your life, so enjoy every moment ,you've waited a long time for this!

[@kaiaaron9246]

It's amazing following your journey, I remember finding you when I was neck deep in dysphoria, not out and pre everything. Seeing how far you've come has been fantastic, and a massive push for me to transition also. I'm now post op and almost 2 years on T, and seeing you go through it helped me a lot. Loving your videos, thank you Finn!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

My friend you have no idea how happy it makes me, to know my vlogs help. Thank you. Congrats on almost 2 years! Isnt it incredible, to know that life can indeed be absolutely amazing!

[@kaiaaron9246]

@@FinnTheInfinncible you're a real inspiration

[@jennipherem3695]

Fantastic video Finn. Congratulations on your journey!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much!

[@celvsmachine]

Wow Finn!!! What a journey!! Cis lesbian here and I just found your story so interesting! Thanks for sharing my dude. You and your boo seem so lovely 😊

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

You are so kind, thank you! Yes, it has been one heck of a journey, but it is one I am very glad to have travelled, and to have shared with you!

[@racheldemain1940]

Wow Go You Finn. Glad it has been successful you fabulous Man . Love You ❤️😘

[@flowersstorms8863]

Thank you for such an incredibly honest and compassionate explanation of your journey. You're an amazing, beautiful & kind human being & I'm so happy I'm in the Finn Fam xx 🤗❤️🥰

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Im so happy you are in the FinnFam too! Thank you so much for your lovely comment!

[@ljasjeff2346]

Your reflections on your journey are similar to my own. This episode is one I would recommend to any trans person to show to cis relatives and friends to help them understand how important transitioning is. My mom was totally resistant but my sister is starting to come around, especially after I told her that this is the happiest I have been in decades.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Love that comment thank you! I'm so glad your family are coming around. I think the initial news can bring fear because there is such a lot of misinformation around, but when they discover the truth and are how happy we are, they usually come around.

[@EthanJay1261]

I finally had time to watch you. This vid was very well said...I remember the ups and downs, changes in mind and soul not just body. As you’ve said, nothing is black and white. There are more shades of gray in our world than some will ever realize. And some of us, who come to a understanding are now trying to add some color that fits the pathway. As always my friend, a great vid!!! Blessings Always

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Buddy! Hello! Long time no chat, hope you are well? Yes, those ups and downs were very worthwhile now, for this glorious techniclour life!

[@jonm2416]

5:50 makes a lot of sense when you explain it all the way you did.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Im very glad it did, thank you!

[@maximellow5745]

It's incredibly inspiring to see you be confident and happy. I can't stop watching your videos, but it's all so bittersweet. I can't transition because I'm chronically ill and taking T is impossible. Maybe one day, when medicine has progressed. Until then thank you for giving me hope:)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless you buddy, I am so sorry to hear that, it must be very tough to deal with. I hope you have lots of good support?

[@kellyreilly-robinson2130]

Gorgeous confident man ♥️♥️♥️

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Why thank you :)

[@alexcole4970]

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡Love this video - always good to see a man in my own age range that echos my own recovery and transition thoughts. Like putting on my favourite t-shirt! Sending you a big safe hug

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I absolutely love that analogy! I love being your favorite T shirt! Sending huge safe hugs in return my friend!

[@lizstubbs2969]

You have come so far you have done amazing to get to where you are now and this video is an amazing explanation thank you so much for sharing your story ❤❤❤

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Ah Liz that means the world, thank you so much :)

[@lizstubbs2969]

@@FinnTheInfinncible You're very welcome you're an inspiration xx

[@martinmoore8216]

Fabulous affirmation for one day at a time! For hanging in there when it’s one millimeter at a time. Inspirational! An edifying Finn rant to be sure. Thank you so much!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless your heart, thank you so much!

[@fayetweedale1456]

Thankyou for helping people understand xxx you should be employed to speak to groups on this xxx

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you. I do give talks, so if anyone you know is looking for a speaker, please send them my way!

[@dorianr4770]

I feel like this was meant for me specifically.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Well I am happy this was what you needed!

[@aleconeil05]

Thank you so much for sharing your journey! I love you and I’m so proud of you! 🥳🥰

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

That is so sweet, thank you! Thank you for watching!

[@RealPoodlebear]

Been a while since I dropped by. So good to see you "done" and happy. Personally I love the grey.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Well hello my friend! Thank you , yes this trans cake is now cooked! With silver topping....

[@SuperRay1982]

Thank you Finn I needed to hear this today x

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Well then I am very glad to be well timed for you! Thanks for watching!

[@johnnytyr4584]

Hi Finn! Great video, thanks so much for the great explanations. I am one week on low dose T.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks for watching and for your kind comments! Congrats on starting t, welcome to the ride of your life!

[@racheldemain1940]

Hi Finn, fantastic Explanatory Video!! In the 1970'a when i grew up , we were either " Girly or a Tomboy", more the latter for me . Being in the wrong Body wasn't even heard of. Even to this day i wouldn't call myself Girly, I rarely wear Make-up and tend to think from a Male Perspective. Did you have people say that you were a Tomboy and that at some point you would settle into being Female?. I have the option to be whichever i want to at any given time. It is an interesting thing learning why people feel that they are in the wrong Body and you explain to so well. Thanks Finn, you Lovely Soul.

[@blackmaggit2294]

I think for a lot of transgender identified individuals, healing from traumas and learning about why one has the feelings towards their own gender they do may help some people realise they don't actually want to transition. But whether therapy actually helps people heal is hmm. I say this because as I've looked inside myself and thought about my gender identity I realised that it doesn't really matter. And I'm happy to have the androgynous body I have a couple of years on t without surgery. But at the same time, I pass as male and feel so happy about the fact I did go on hormones. Transitioning isn't a cure all but perhaps having the freedom and control to make that decision to somewhat redefine oneself creates a good base for healing. Just some unedited thoughts. I love your positivity!:D

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I love your unedited thoughts, thanks for sharing! yes, counselling/therapy/support can be incredibly useful to help us to work through our feelings about our gender, and help us to work out what we do or dont need in terms of transition, but if we discover that we are trans then therapy cannot make us not trans. People have tried, but it rarely works without causing more damage. It is good to hear you have found your 'right place', that is what it is all about. That does indeed give us the right base of healing. Thanks so much for watching and for your thoughtful comments! Ps, if you are new, welcome! I have extra blogs and info over on finlaygames.com

[@blackmaggit2294]

@@FinnTheInfinncible @FinnTheInfinncible Yeah I 100% agree with that. There is nothing wrong about being trans and its not about "saving people from themselves" and more about helping people best cope with the situation they find themselves in. Transitioning may be obsurd to some but everything is obsurd!! Thank you:)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Yeeeees!

[@emmakateholder5626]

Hey handsome man x always love love watching your videos. You are an amazing man x lots of love xxxx

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks lovely. Very glad to have you as a friend!

[@pmbluemoon]

I am still not happy with parts of my lower body, but think I have found a "semi-happy medium" for now. The top surgery was DEFINITELY worth the wait, my voice never changed unfortunately, I still get "squeaky happy" sometimes haha, oh well! I laugh like a tweety bird too, I just figure that I've heard cis men have higher voices then mine, and they've said they get misgendered on the phone as well as I do "Is the man of the house home mam?" 🤷‍♂️🤦‍♂️ I live a double life to this day. Since living back in my home town, I still have people who are confused, or just don't want to see me any other way besides the "who I was" when they met me/grew up with me. I get that little twinge of happiness when someone calls me "Sir" at the store, or even asks me what I want to be called when I tell them I legally changed my name. Right now I would say 25% of my circle calls me "she" and my old name, and 75% do their best to acknowledge who I really am. I loved when you said you are at the top of trans mountain, and it's an amazing view; made me misty eyed in a good way! 😥😊 I started writing a letter/poem to my significant other while watching your video, I can tell when each part of your video brought up an interesting thought, idea, feeling, or topic that I haven't yet even addressed to myself let alone anyone else. I won't share it here, maybe I'll save it for later and share it once I've fixed it up a bit... Wow, Finn, this was Finntastic! Sorry if this is too much info for a comment, but I joined a research group (AllofUs) and was just reading up on my own genetic traits and such, plus I did a "23 and Me" genetics test, I'm 99.9% Northern European! Wow, that surprised me lol 😮😊 I'm glad I'm finding out about my heritage though, my mum didn't talk about it, and I don't know my dad's side, so I felt a bit "uninformed/incomplete" about where I'm from, thus signing up for all of this DNA study stuff and now thrilled about it 😃 Much love and thank you so much for this video, I'm in a new sort of fugue tonight, my brain will have much fun chewing on all of this new info I've absorbed and expressed today with many thanks of gratitude to you my Fabulous Infinncible Finn! 👍👏✌✨🎆🥰

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless your heart buddy, your comments are never too much, I love them. It just breaks my heart that you feel unable to be fully you. You desrve to be seen, to be happy, to live as the man you truly are. The view from trans mountain is epic, and it is scalable to anyone, because one step at a time anything is possible. Much love and thank you for being you :)

[@pmbluemoon]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you for your encouraging words and kindness, much love to you as well and I'm still very glad I found your channel! 👍🥰✌✨🕊

[@gabrielraphael8084]

Dear Finn, I am glad to see you in a good place. I am experiencing some distress around my gender. I feel and have felt a lot of discomfort in my body but am very afraid of transition mtf. Is it normal to feel this tortured before transition ? I don't know how to make sense of this experience. I feel it is much more difficult for mtf than ftm...

[@byetodd]

As a non-trans person, that is trying to cement my understanding of the world of being trans, i am watching this like i am sitting in a college lecture lol.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Ah well I am very glad to help with your understanding! Tons more info on my website if it helps! finlaygames.com/welcome/

[@mayhmmaydn]

Thank you and Bless you for sharing your journey. Im so honoref to have gone along with you. Massive smootchies.. Coodles and i hope some day to get an armful of you my dear man.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I am honoured that you walk my journey with me, thank you so much! Cuddles in person one day would be amazing!

[@leo.l.e3488]

You explain it so extremely well. Thank you so much.👍🙂👍💝

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you very much for that kind feedback!

[@aileencastro901]

My daughter has just turned 11 and is starting HIS process, I just want to help as much as possible

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless you, thats wondeful to hear. If I can be of any help, do pop me a message over on my website finlaygames.com/mentoring-and-coaching/

[@kriskabin]

Aileen, you're to be commended for SEEING & SUPPORTING your gifted child! You're truely a GOOD/UNCONDITIONALLY LOVING parent.💜🙏

[@loboandsystem]

Hello thank you for this video its good content Im glad you harp on the individuality of every persons transition. I like you knew i needed hormones and top surgery but the difference between us 2 is initially i wanted bottom surgery but as i gotbon hormones over time i felt comfortable with my birth sex and it didnt change my maleness so i have since opted to only pursue a hysterectomy and skipping the rest of lower surgery options. thanks again for your content its inspiring

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you for your kind comment. Yes, it is so important to me that I make people aware that there is more than one way to be trans and to transition. And its important for the reasons you mention, so that people can be free to chose what works for them, even when that changes over time. I love to hear how your journey unfolded!

[@inclusioncrowd105]

Wow inspirational - so happy for you x

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thanks my friend!

[@americasariesson1862]

Your Vids are amazing Fin!!!👍 Always wanted testosterone in my system - not to bodybuild but simply had a drive to have it At a very young age I sat on the toilet backwoods to pee like a boy and tugged on myself and telling myself with a sigh of relief “ mine would come later “ ...to my conscious knowledge I had not seen a male penis and didn’t until well into adulthood I don’t worry about finding someone who will want me - because without a penis and the ability to perform with a woman as I am meant to I see no purpose in driving myself into madness trying to. It’s great for her and fine for me but it’s too painful and brings rage for me. I am 53 and been officially transitioning for nearly 1.5 - 2 years ...it’s too late for bottom surgery and I may get top ...my parents are lot aware of all this as I rarely see them. I don’t hold any hope for deciding to tell them as it would create too much pain for them and subsequently myself.

[@ASMRLISAMJ]

you are amazing finn so happy for you :D

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much :)

[@AEW0416]

I’m so happy for you Finn and so glad that you’ve taken us all with you on your journey. ❤️

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I am incredibly grateful that you continue to walk with me, thank you!

[@lindzexposure9347]

I follow what you’ve said on everything else, but I have a question about something you’ve said. You said some trans people don’t have any gender dysphoria at all? I don’t understand how that’s possible? How could a trans woman feel like a woman and always had felt comfortable in a man’s body? In a masculine body? Say you were a bio man, in the body you’re in- super masculine.... and then you realize that you’re a trans woman. But how would you not look at the beard and the muscles and the male anatomy, and make that connection of feeling as a woman and not feel dysphoric about your body? I’ve been watching your videos for a long time because my best friend is trans and I wanted to help understand what he’s going through. And dysphoria seems to be something the common thing that every trans person has? Have you met trans people who haven’t transitioned at all, and have no dysphoria?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Its a great question. I too struggle to understand how you can be transgender and not experience distress. However, many trans people do discover their true gender in an entirely different way. by experiencing gender euphoria. This seems to be more common in younger trans peoples experience, which makes sense as largely, as mentioned in my video, it is untreated gender dysphoria which causes distress. For people who don't experience dysphoria, they instead discover their gender through experimenting with their gender expresion and presentation and the good feeling, the euphoria they get from that, is what tells them that they are transgender. It certainly isnt my experince and I do struggle to understand it, but I also realise that it does haooen and so it is important to note it. Otherwise the danger is, that gender dysphoria will be seen as the only valid way to disocver oneself when this clearly is not the case. Does that make sense?

[@huskeater]

FinnTheInfinncible you wouldnt get the euphoria if theres no dysphoria to combat it? wouldnt that just be gender expression and not being trans? ive asked my therapist about it and she doesn’t understand it either.

[@C_22]

I think that, for exemple, some people manage to repress the feelings of not quite feeling right to the point of being in complete denial and so forget about it, ignore it. But perhaps a fancy dress opportunity will arise and they'll go as a character of the opposite gender and go oh... I like this better ... or perhaps they are in a situation where they are allowed to express themselves as they wish and have been allowed since a young age and so there is less disstress I watched a video with someone in this second category it was really interesting. Of course the person may be non binary and not be as dysphoric as a very binary trans person. Hope some of that makes some sense :)

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you for adding that, very helpful!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

It is tricky to understand, and because it isnt my experience I find it hard to imagine too, and to explain adequately. However, its best thinking of it in terms that there is more than one way to discover we are trans. In western society, being trans is heaviliy medicalised, and there is often a ton of pressure to present in a certain way, so that gatekeepers approve out transitions. This means that those whose experiences dont match, who might know exactly who we are but not have discovered it via the root of distress, could then be deemed to not be trans and then be denied access to hormones or surgery. I found this article which explains it much better than I can everydayfeminism.com/2015/08/not-all-trans-folks-dysphoria/

[@djhgaming9402]

I am so happy for you!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you so much!

[@kevinsjournal]

You look great! I'm a biological male and can't even put on muscle nor grow a beard lol, I might even be andro or metro, honestly no clue what i am, I'm just me lol.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Being just you is absolutely perfect!

[@kevinsjournal]

@Zeus Christos It does and no we're not desperate, we just really are special in our own way lol, being well groomed as a male, especially excessively is considered breaking a traditional male stereotype.

[@manchitas3531]

I like you so much, Finn! God bless you

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Ah how lovely! Thank you!

[@mauriziavilla3958]

It is a success fo sure, my dear!!!! 😘👍

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

It really is! Thank you!

[@captainharlock2280]

awww gives me hope

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Very glad to give you hope, there is much hope to be had!

[@seanalex4833]

Thank you for the message from the Trans summit. It was the most helpful message that I've received in all my years of therapy.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Bless your heart, yes there is much hope to be had! Thanks for watching and for your kind message

[@edb7976]

I’m not very good with KZbin and tech etc...is there a way I can PM Finn?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Of course my friend, pop me an email at [e-mail]

[@edb7976]

FinnTheInfinncible Epic, thanks!

[@e22378]

Great video

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you!

[@danderson4757]

Wonderful video. 💕

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Thank you very much!

[@lizstubbs2969]

Did drinking etc cause any permanent damage to your body ie liver damage or did your body recover in time after you stopped?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I am very lucky to have no lasting damage. Thanks to mum for my resiliant body!

[@lizstubbs2969]

@@FinnTheInfinncible That's so good to hear xx

[@calni27]

Gender dysphoria is still in the DSM so it is still classified as mental illness. The goal of therapy for LGBT people is like for all people is to understand ourselves more deeply - conversion therapy is pretty rare and don’t via religious institutions. Regular therapists are not doing this so let’s not discourage people from seeking therapy as it can be very helpful.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I'd never discourage anyone from seeking therapy, quite the opposite, I actively encourage people, I think it's incredibly important as trans people, to seek support working through gender questioning and through transition. However, I have to correct you on gender dysphoria. It is in the DSM but it isn't a mental illness, it used to be listed as such but that was changed and is no longer the case. Whilst it's recognised gender dysphoycauses psychological distress, it isn't in itself a mental illness.

[@calni27]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Everything in the DSM, which stands for The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, is considered abnormal psychology. The DSM is the manual for classifying mental illness and gender dysphoria is listed.

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

@@calni27 to be more correct, The DSM-5 mainly focuses on mental health conditions. However, because mental health and brain function are inseparable, the DSM-5 also covers conditions and concerns related to how the brain works. There are a number of conditions included in the DSM, that are not mental illness, autism for example, but rather disorders or conditions of the brain. So no, just because of the title of the DSM it doesn't mean it's a mental illness, it's the way it's classified which is important. And being transgender and experiencing gender incongruity was very clearly declassified as a mental illness back in 2013

[@ryancadena1188]

I'm a little bit confused about "Not every trans person experiences dysphoria"

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Yes, I understand. It was pointed out to me some time ago, and at first I was confused too, especially as I had experienced so much distress myself, I couldnt imagine how you could be trans and not feel distressed. But, there is more than one way to disover yourself to be trans and so now I note this fact because it is important that all paths to self discovery are acknowledged. This article explains it more clearly than I can everydayfeminism.com/2015/08/not-all-trans-folks-dysphoria/

[@emilys1255]

I have a question as a straight female who has had gender identity issues. Why if youre attracted to men did you decide to transition? I guess this is kind of an ignorant question. But I am asking this as a female attracted to males who currently presents butch/nonbinary. Silly question, but, Why does this happen? 😅

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Gender identity and sexual attraction are different things. I'm attracted to men yes, but it's my gender identity that I had an issue with, I wasn't female and I needed to transition. Just dating men wouldn't have changed my gender identity issues, I would have been a woman dating men, which felt awful back when I was doing that and it never sat right. Once I sorted out my gender identity, and realised I was male and changed my body to reflect that, dating men changed because now I'm dating as a man and being seen and treated as a man. Does that make sense? This video explains in more detail. kzbin.info/www/bejne/eF63qmiipNBjqs0

[@emilys1255]

@@FinnTheInfinncible Oh ok I'll check the video out. Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I too have had gender identity issues and yet I have only been with men so I understand that (or I'm trying to because I decided transition wasn't for me and live as an androgynous female with a short boyish haircut, baggy guys clothes but, i still use a purse which has gotten me some strange looks).

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

@@emilys1255 whilst gender identity and sexual attraction are different, they are also connected, once we know who we are are we are confident in that, then we know who we want to date. Be exactly who you want to be, dress how you want, acvessorize in whatever way makes you happy, sod what the world thinks, you will find your people!

[@VeesFunkyAZZshop]

You are so handsome!!

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

And you are so kind! Thank you :)

[@nancywysemen7196]

how lovely to be comfortable in your own body. i am doing so much better as a healthy enuf senior. no need to be "cute"....blaugh

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Good enough is the perfect way to be!

[@JimmiAlli]

Can I ask a question please. How do you know if you are trans if you do not have any dysphoria?

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Its not an experience I can even begin to understand, but some people experience a themselves as trans by disovering they feel better presenting differently and this gives them a euphoria, which tells them they are trans. I linked to this article before whic explains it better. everydayfeminism.com/2015/08/not-all-trans-folks-dysphoria/

[@ulyssess.244]

How old are you if you don’t mind me asking

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

I am 46 😊

[@kathaverevuntundhi5396]

Plzz tell the name of ur testerone

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Hello! I am on Nebido

[@dickwatson5329]

Great video Finn Your decision on your sexuality was decided prior to your birth in your mothers womb and your transition has made your life complete

[@FinnTheInfinncible]

Yes indeed! Thank you so much for that kind comment, and for watching!