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/ being_frank_yang
BiggerStrongerWeirder
www.vimeo.com/Digitalairair
The 2nd installment of my celebrity workout tape feat. the Brad Pitt physique.
(Tom Cruise) • HOW TO RUN LIKE TOM CR...
brief look at my sexual history and what made me work out as a result (while lifting)
A lot of people think I deliberately try hard to act weird and different for attention. Well I like attention (bet you do too) so I won't deny that part.
But if you watched my last video: • Frank Yang - Asian-Ame...
You can pretty much tell that I've been fucked in the head all my life and there is no way I had the concept of trying to be a hipster at age 5 or 11?
You think I sit in the dark just think up weird thoughts on purpose? Those thoughts intrusively just pop into my head and there's nothing I can do to make them go away. Schizophrenia's can't stop themselves from hearing voices if they want to. Anorexias can't just snap out of it and eat some damn food.
I actually hate it when ideas pop into my head because I'll be like FUCK now I gotta do something to shit it out of my brain by materializing it into the world because if I don't do it, the ideas snowball and turn even more bizarre and I feel even more fucked.
When you are scared to go to sleep at night because you would be bombarded with thoughts that you can't even tell anybody, not even yourself about, unless you mild it down and disguise it as "art" to post on the internet.
I mean if you can dig my brain out of my skull I bet it would look so queer that it won't even resemble a brain. If my mind was a body then it would look like a disfigured monster.
And just as a handicapped freak can hide his monstrosity by chatting to people on the internet, I can only do the opposite.
I buy pretty clothes, get cool haircut, and work out my muscles and used to go to the clubs just so I can look and feel normal and disguise myself when I go out into the public and have to have conversations with people.
People in art school or a Lady Gaga who dress weird and bizarre, but when you actually talk to them or listen to their interviews or songs their minds are as normal any other minds. And THAt annoys me because they think it's fun and "cool" to advertise themselves as "freaks".
My exes used to always tell me to be normal because once I start to date someone more than a night, some of my shit surfaces and I can't hide my subconscious so well anymore.
I remember one of my ex used to tell me that I was so weird that it makes her want to vomit.
One of them dumped me for a church goer who collects Jordans. The other one is now dating a 9 - 5 guy who posed pictures of his BMW as his profile picture.
It makes me sad and jelly because in all honesty, I wouldn't mind walking in their shoes for the rest of my life.