The Twilight Saga Did NOT Age Well

[@pinkdragon4830]

Never ask… …a woman her age …a man his salary …Jasper what he was doing during the Civil War

[@avrie6668]

…. Why the wolf wanted to mate with his true mate that was a fetus…

[@avrie6668]

Not that I would but in the entirely hypothetical scenario where the world wasn’t shit and I wanted a kid who would grow into a person if someone wanted to date my kid and they were older (or if they wanted mine and theirs to date) I would make their death look like an accident (I know multiple ways not that I’m planning anything but just in case I meat someone truly unworthy of life like those two guys . . . . . . . . that put their “thing” in their own baby two different people with different wives but for the same reason their wife wasn’t there and wasn’t having sex with them both died but one of them barely looked like it did, one of them was in a country that viewed woman as animals lesser than males it and the other was in New York or something I read it hen I was thirteen or something it was when I was young young the guy was obviously caught since the mom wasn’t even gone for long and he was a terrible actor it was obvious to everyone that he did it

[@MatthewCauldwell]

​@@avrie6668 I feel like making it look like an accident kinda takes away the point of it because then someone else will come and imprint on them and you're going to have to make it look like another accident and then another one and so on and so forth, where if you just make it look like you kill people who try and imprint on your children then they would probably not imprint on children and at the very least your children would no longer be getting imprinted on.

[@LucasNucasInTheHole]

I’m the 3rd 1000th like =D

[@NessOnigiri]

No it's so funny (I'm black), I joke with my friends that Jasoer was using hard R and im pretty sure Alice or the rest of the Cullens had to coach him out of it or he's only so quiet to hide his raging civil war thoughts. So I like to think Edward doesn't glare at him for like normal things like "stay away from bella" he's probably like "dude shut up with the racist shit, I know"

[@MollyOllyOxenfree]

Fun fact: in middle school I was hissed at by a classmate who was a super fan of twilight. To this day, it is one of the most bizarre and frightening moments of my life.

[@MEM_8008]

sorry 😔

[@kartkaesque]

Sorry 😔 ×2

[@that0nerandomperson374]

Sorry 😔 x 3

[@gallavichpuppy]

Sorry 😔 x4

[@HurtSambo]

Sorry 😔 x5

[@CheeseduckClaire]

The problem isn't Kristen Stewart's facial expressions, it's the looong lingering camera shots of nothing but her facial expressions.

[@luzng]

Deep.

[@charliezard-_-8174]

Yeah she’s not the most natural in the role but the filming and script didn’t help her

[@lalalalauren91]

Also.... her shaking the non ketchup out or the bottle on her veg burger 😂Ohh, and the invisible man driving the tractor trailer when Bella firsts comes to Forks 👌🏻 Just saying

[@susanthejew6351]

yeah the problem isn't at all the only emotion she can manage is constipated... reality is she sucked as much as the lingering shots making it even worse

[@Wifeyedition]

Lmfaooo

[@Abejaved]

It's ironic that Bella acted more alive in the final movie than any of the other ones considering she is technically dead in it.

[@lajeannablair2784]

In the books when she becomes a vampire, that is when she feels the most alive and happy

[@DeaDiabola]

​@lajeannablair2784 Yeah because then her elderly child fvcker boyfriend and her can be together forever which is quite the decision for a LITERAL TEENAGER to make

[@claire7896]

it's almost like that's the point...

[@dozyhrs9344]

My teacher once said that Twilight is a story about a girl choosing between necrophilia or zoophilia

[@hotmilo]

Fax

[@solmartel360]

Basically 😂

[@lulufan100]

Don't forget really inappropriate age gaps. Like mother, like daughter 😊

[@hotmilo]

@@lulufan100 definitely. Sugar baby but with a MAJOR gap.

[@mirabela1344]

😂😂😂😂

[@rachyhoney]

I remember reading someone saying online that Charlie’s POV would just be a horror story.

[@user-wi9hv2pb2q]

I would be a lot more team Charlie if he hadn't let his daughter marry into what would appear to any parent as some weird cult.

[@DarkMartianFighter]

I would love to read that actually

[@alpaca6462]

​​@@user-wi9hv2pb2q she's 18 when they get married, he literally cannot stop her from doing anything lol

[@induspherix]

I suppose the real demarcation between RicknMorty and Galaxy of Terror is the presence of blatant irony. So all it takes to provide Charlie some zen calm is to provide him 4th wall-breaking awareness that he has materialized into Sealab 2021 for adolescents in Bill Gate's backyard. They should split the difference and script the Charlie POV like a Sucker Punch take on Evil Dead 2 and Army of Darkness tropes, showcasing Charlie's secret fantasies of defying the original script by going full on Bruce Campbell to solve all his annoyances. Boomsticks, diesel punk prosthetic chainsaws, and Rob Zombie toasting the musical interludes with excerpts from the necronomicon. Who's up for crowd funding? 🤪

[@sharksarecoooool]

there’s a video from a youtuber called amanda todhunter (i think that’s her name) where she actually did that, it kinda does sound like a horror story 😭

[@katiehambrick4079]

The most unbelievable part of the Cullen’s cover story, in my opinion, is that the whole town would buy that Carlisle, a man in his EARLY 20s would willingly adopt 5 teenagers.

[@GamesFromSpace]

I wouldn't willingly talk to five teenagers, let alone adopt them.

[@namename9998]

Or that he was a doctor in his early 20s ("The most common route to becoming a physician involves completing a bachelor's degree, followed by medical school, and then 3 years or more in a residency program for a medical specialty. At the very least, the entire process can take 11 years, putting the average age for a beginning doctor at 29 or 30.") Or that Edward was 100+- yrs old, is hot for Bella but wants to wait until hes married to have sex but hasnt been married over the past 100 yrs. Or hes okay with sex outside of marriage except for Bella for some reason.

[@NinjaSaitama]

And none of them where from a third world country.

[@lukabougainvillea]

Well his physical age was 23, but it was never said in the movies and I really doubt that they would go out and say Carlisle was 23. When I looked at him in the first movie I thought he looked really young, but like in his 30s. They would never go around and say he's 23. Especially when in the I think second movie Edward literally is like. "And Carlisle starts to look to young for the age he should be" which, at least for me, is a big clue that they never said, well, yeah he's 23 and has like 5 adoptive children and a wife

[@namename9998]

Carlisles age was an easy fix. Instead of saying everyone was adopted they could have said that Carlisle came from a big family and sometimes his brothers and sisters live with him. Maybe his brothers and sisters were adopted instead of Carlisle being the one who adopted them.

[@Unseen_Fiend]

There are so many problems with twilight but Jasper being a confederate was WILD

[@madssocks8532]

Especially paired with the fact that he's supposed to be an empath! Like, how -Lane

[@grandlordSpencer]

petition for Gabi to write, direct, and star in a Charlie Swan spin-off

[@SuzysRedStripes]

Yes!

[@missmoon1849]

omg yesssss

[@yasmim7680]

✍🏻

[@dwydeezdundoon]

only if she does a back eyed sneeze angle where she traps chuck in the closet with the 'typhoon balloon' and forces his hand through marriage.

[@lomoliving5528]

I didn't know that I needed that until I watched this video!

[@roninnka]

The reason Bella does dangerous stuff in New Moon is so she can see Edward’s force ghost thing. She thinks it’s Edward using some vampy power so when they reunite she asks him about it and he’s like “what tf are you talking about?”. Turns out it was Bella’s hallucination the whole time and nobody took the girly to therapy???

[@Userislame098]

It’s called grief hallucinations, happens to ppl who are heart broken after a recent loss

[@burninsherman1037]

​@@Userislame098that's definitely a thing, but the way it's portrayed in the movie is absolutely horrible.

[@RicardoAlexandre-e9f]

This baby is crazy😂😂😂

[@paulas7414]

It is so sad that she is so addicted to Edward that she basically risks her life only to see his „ghost“

[@whit3d0ve]

@@paulas7414THIS ONE. she is so addicted and attached to him, it physically and mentally puts her into danger

[@topotondo828]

Fun fact, I met my fiancé because we both noticed the continuity error of the weird looking taxidermied armadillo in the biology class scene (you can see it @3:10) which disappears and reappears between shots and thought it was the best part of the movie. He made a Facebook fan page about it, I found it, and we became pen pals (he is Italian and I was studying Italian at the time) and eventually met in person after years of online friendship. We will be getting married next year and joke about going to Forks as part of our honeymoon and somehow incorporating armadillos into our ceremony.

[@maroulakii]

THAT IS SO CUTE I WISH YALL THE BEST 😭😭😭

[@topotondo828]

@@maroulakii Thank you!! His visa interview is this week, it's the final step and I can't believe we're so close to finally living together

[@Sol-lf6em]

I rarely post comments or answers, but your comment was so extraordinary I couldn’t just go on. It’s so funny and sweet! Congratulations, I hope all will go well for you two 😊 I hope you’ll be able to go to Forks, where it all started 😁

[@topotondo828]

@@Sol-lf6em Thank you so much for reading our story and for the well wishes! His visa interview was today. When they asked him how we met, he didn't mention the armadillo specifically 😆but they still told him on the spot that he got the visa!!

[@tiale1994]

Really a better love story than Twilight 😂

[@robertrichards6964]

“Loud, weird guitar music” is a really good way to describe Muse lol

[@xragdoll5662]

And now they play that song at every freaking concert 😭😭

[@SilverstrikeSD]

My millennial ass was very offended

[@whereverover]

​@SilverstrikeSD i join the offended millineal ass club. i mean, i was a fan before the vampy films😂

[@jonny-b4954]

Funny story, I was in jail in 2008 for 60 days due to retail theft to support my addiction. And had my parents send me 2 of these books in the mail to read. I asked for some vampire books because I was into Anne Rice at the time. This is what they sent. Dude, after reading them, and talking them up as a 18 year old, I had half the fuckin jail block talking about Bella and Edward. As these "bad ass vampires and werewolves" hahah. Sold them for 5 honeybuns (typical currency in jail) to a guy as I was getting out the next day. I like to think the fandom never ended within the jail block and to this day, 15 years later, people are still passing my Twilight books around hahah. Nowadays, I wonder how I wasn't bullied over it. But, probably because I was the youngest in the block and most the old timers took to youngins.

[@fossilfighters101]

+

[@bcc5701]

Shit jail for 60 is rough. Had an uncle do 45(yrs) in the fed and he still to this day says the month In county waiting to go was the worst part of it

[@jonny-b4954]

@@bcc5701 Jail sucks, that's for sure. My county's jail has a facility where you go once sentenced though, and it's much "better" than the branch jail where you go when arrested. But yeah, I did 60 days, 45 days, 30 days twice. Almost died twice from spinal infection and blood infection. Had IV antibiotics for 6 months, had to carry them around in a pack with a PICC line to my heart. Shit was wild. I'd still rather do jail than prison. Just because prison is prison. No gangs in jail. Mostly just people riding out their fairly short sentences. Glad I've been done with that bullshit for over a decade and clean like 6 years and some months

[@TheRealCardoso]

This is the best thing I ever read

[@alienatedlibrarian5017]

This story delights me so hard

[@malmaller2375]

Even though you could argue that New Moon is the worst movie, the depression sequence might be the best directed scene in the entire franchise.

[@lollybirdy]

It encapsulated how depression feels which is why I like it

[@addykirschling3650]

pride and prejudice does it better and did it first lol

[@behnammcdelijani3898]

And also the song was a perfect match for it

[@AutisticAsexual]

I have to skip new moon every time I re-watch (which is a lot, its one of my special interests) because it will trigger a depressive episode every time lol

[@benamisai-kham5892]

@@AutisticAsexual I also skip New Moon every rewatch, not just because of depression but Jacobs presence in that movie makes me uncomfortable and I can't sit through it.

[@lamcb.9476]

I just laugh thinking on that one fanon theory, that Stephine realized that she made Jacob such a nice guy in the second book, she had to retroactively make him worse from there on out to support her OTP and make Edward the lesser of two evils

[@raveng8217]

I believe this wholeheartedly. Jacob was objectively the better choice for Bella in New Moon, so Stephanie had to assassinate his character and make him the literal worst so that anyone would root for team Edward.

[@nyxldx]

funny as it would be that's not true 😂 Stephanie originally wrote breaking dawn first so the first version of Jacob was the one we got by the very end. (still imprinting on bella's baby, but they didn't have the strong friendship to tie them)

[@DespairDoctor]

And then he falls in love with their demonspawn

[@eliesh3833]

@@raveng8217 Okay, bit of a rant here, but here we go. I've literally seen other authors do this when they write love triangles. There will be two love interests, one of them being a genuinely kind and decent person, and the other one being downright terrible if not straight-up abusive to the protagonist. The former can logically be deemed the "better option," but because the author wants the protagonist to be with the bad boy, they resort to character assassination for the other boy just to make him seem worse. All to make the protagonist seem justified in being with someone who is already pretty abhorrent. I once saw this trope being done for a book that involved a protagonist willfully cheating on her husband, a man who actually loved and cared for her, with a man who had kidnapped, manipulated and abused her. But to make it seem okay, the author made the husband turn into a horrible person so that mister kidnapper here could kill him off, and protagonist could be with the "alpha male bad boy" just as the author intended. This is a trope that actually kind of infuriates me, because I can just tell why authors do this. It becomes a matter of a protagonist falling for the bad boy not because they have a well-informed reason to, but because the story itself wants them to.

[@katkat7828]

Edward was never lesser of the two evils. Jacob was a literal teenager with self control hindered by becoming a wolf and has no agency with the imprinting thing. Even then he's much better than Edward. Edward is a 100 something year old obsessive, manipulative stalker who is only interested in Bella because he cannot hear her thoughts and is able to project his demented idea of a perfect woman onto her. He was always the best choice and continued to be.

[@itrashcant7947]

The distorted Twlight piano always makes me laugh whenever it plays 😂😂

[@FurTheWorkers]

One thing that always bothered me: if Jasper is so damn unstable and dangerous, why do they let him go to school? There's no telling what random thing might happen to set him off, and then the school is all dead.

[@billieseyelashes]

i know!!

[@luisrtorres513]

No bc the fact that in the first film Jasper is basically the newest addition to the family and they are letting him go to a whole ass school with humans and their blood LITERALLY EVERYWHERE. How did he not try to attack anyone but Bella had a small ass paper cut in New Moon and he lost his shit 😭😭

[@virginiafernandez6846]

Honestly, they'd be more bothered by having to move than the bloodbath.

[@sophiestelmack9255]

I like to think that he’s fine with other people and their blood but Bella is extra stinky as per movie one

[@asmrtpop2676]

@@luisrtorres513A school fulla students on their period 😭

[@eviebuggs886]

Charlie is not just a dilf. He is THE DILF. He is respectful, kind, and somehow was able to live with Bella without going insane, and he's hot.

[@jack_of_nil]

He is hot.

[@herlocksholmes-uv5qw]

He is also kinda brainmushed which makes it all the better ❤

[@christinalomeli7024]

😮😅, but I respectfully disagree! But he is a great dad!

[@CassTeaElle]

Eh... he also praised a dude for sexually assaulting his daughter, and then made a joke about how he might have to arrest her for punching the guy. But to be fair, I blame that on the author, not the character. Because that felt extremely out of character for Charlie, to me. I think he would have absolutely lost his freaking mind if a guy kissed his daughter against her will and she had to use physical force to get him to stop. Bullets would be flying.

[@incendiarypoprocks8700]

Just putting it out there … Stephanie Myers was a big Mormon celebrity, and this movie sage is literally just repressed Mormon sexuality turned up to a 10. Makes the whole “we have to be married first” thing make a lot more sense.

[@emmavrijburg6676]

finally someone else points this out

[@darrylwhitefeather207]

YES

[@cassandrashelton3690]

I didn't know that😳😳

[@footballgirl263]

But why is it dangerous 😭

[@sarak2305]

Plus the whole “carry this baby even though you are literally dying”

[@arjay0490]

“People killing, people dying” (victoria while remembering james)

[@alexandrap9368]

Growing up means realizing that Charlie is the most desirable bachelor in the Twilight series.

[@serendipity7921]

100%

[@GamesFromSpace]

Also the least problematic hypothetical interest for bella.

[@katztoffelbrei6780]

I was always Team Charlie and I never understood how people could like Edward - or Jacob after the second book. And Bella was the worst. 😶

[@Lowwski]

Yeah and carlisle

[@readaholicgirl_5]

Yeah, he said it himself in the movies, around Bella's wedding. He's a ladies man

[@ChickadeeBoi]

I was firmly team Alice. I seriously believe Alice is the only one who doesn't have a toxic relationship with Bella...Plus she is way better lookin that Edward or Jacob, and well who said she had to pick a boy?😅

[@thrattjaouhard3372]

I was team Rosalie

[@elizabethaluoch8100]

You sir are a genius! 😂

[@lilideloy298]

Same 😂

[@katherinesmallbean3594]

Team Alice 👏

[@BassicallyKiyash]

REAL

[@nopusnopius]

22:39 This was a literal character suicide performed by Stephenie Meyer. She saw that Twilight fans favored Jacob over Edward, so she put this scene to be like "See, Jacob's a piece of sh**, now love Edward! He would never do that to Bella!".

[@caroline7420]

Exactly. I’m convinced Jacob in New Moon was the equivalent of a celebrity dating PR stunt to get people talking, draw in curious people who wanted to be a part of the chatter, and then SM went back to her original plan with a way larger fan base.

[@AlienCowThatMoos]

50 Shades of Gray Skeletor Meme: "Joke's on you, I'm into that s***."

[@quinnzykir]

I mean. If you know Mormons. Then Yeeeeeeah

[@sadie1606]

No seriously! As if she didn’t set up the love triangle. She’s such a bad writer, I’m kinda angry how her novel got so popular but better novels got slept on.

[@zeebeereactions]

Jokes on her because I ended up studying psychology and realised Edward is equally worse 😅 their whole relationship was abusive as hell up until they married

[@Valeriee3058]

"you fucking stink, take a shower" "would you still love me if i was a worm?" Well damn, Edward.

[@reveluver6192]

the repeated “the day in the life of Charlie Swan” bit had me DYING. Something about the pic of gabi dressed as Charlie sliding across the screen was so funny to me 😭

[@xxxaragon]

I was literally on the floor laughing. amazing.

[@anacarolinamenezes8912]

I’m Brazilian, the whole Rio de Janeiro thing was because Brazil had one of the biggest twilight fanbases in the world and so they wanted to please us. But then they did the most random and absurd depiction of Brazil with them coming out of the plane and there being people dancing samba out of nowhere, and the indigenous Brazilians depiction were so offensive too lol

[@GHMYahooka]

Thats not why, not many people know this but there is a collective of extremely powerful vampires in brazil who weren't happy with stephanie and told her to do something to appease them or they would send people after her. She's only talked about it vaguely once or twice in some super obscure places because she was never supposed to say anything so hardly anyone even knows unless they're someone who knows about the collective already and knows how pissed they were about the whole sparkly thing. I can't say much more or ill get in trouble from my family but yeah its the true story about that situation.

[@sadie1606]

Well Stephanie is Mormon and that religion is inherently racist af

[@purplestarsarecool]

@@GHMYahooka you okay ?

[@jefersonribeiro9319]

@@GHMYahooka you know too much...

[@taylorellis6358]

@@GHMYahookalmao

[@uniatq]

Fun fact: the author of twilight tried to go out with my uncle in high school and my whole family thought she was crazy. There’s a character in twilight who looks just like him too!

[@godscomplex13]

Which one

[@cherriegetison6093]

Sir, you still have a little tea left in your cup to spill.

[@caixucook3]

Bro finish telling the tea

[@DeviBuster]

Considering she's a die-hard mormon I'm not surprised she was crazy

[@amandapanda5087]

I want the rest of this story

[@lonelyfroggy5787]

Fun fact: It is canon in the Twilight universe that you can't be dark-skinned and a vampire, in the books it's claimed that the vampire venom would destroy all melanin in the body, while conveniently forgetting that would also affect eye and hair color. So Meyer was just doing it so she could write out POC from her books.

[@zombiefvckerr]

but what about that one guy in the black eyed peas 😭😭

[@bituinl]

Vampires aren’t human so i honestly don’t see the problem. I think it sounds like a good reason.

[@lonelyfroggy5787]

@@bituinl It’s actually a terrible reason lmao it would have made more sense to just not address it and move on. If you’re gonna bring real world science into fantasy bullshit at least follow your own rules.

[@bituinl]

@@lonelyfroggy5787 yeah at the rules was they loose Melanie. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[@lonelyfroggy5787]

@@bituinl Why does Edward and other Cullens have brunette hair or brown eyes in the book then? The point is that the rule is ONLY used to write out POC. It's a bullshit reason Meyers wrote in after the fact to make herself not look exclusive.

[@samanthamark3012]

I feel so bad for the actors, bad script, bad directing, bad work environment. Thank god Batman got out of there lol

[@gggthsb]

true, but in the end those movies started their careers so 🤷😅

[@itshel2677]

@kskwkowkqmwmosowowb yaaaaas

[@carlgrimcs]

hooray for cedric diggory

[@Psycho-Ssnake]

Was it the porpoise meat?

[@samanthamark3012]

@@surejan-ml1gs I agree with that for the most part, but you can't deny the physical toll it took on the actors. The pressure to look a certain way has done lifelong damage. Twilight is also the first of its kind, no movies of that type had gotten that big. Twilight was and is a cultural cornorstone, for better or worse.

[@obrien92]

i will say, one of the reasons bella swan is so head empty is because she’s depressed as hell, and she only likes edward for the thrill. i know most people understandably don’t like new moon, but i watched it fresh after leaving my abusive ex, and i was like “damn okay, yeah, don’t be like bella.” so bad movie, good warning sign i guess lol

[@kdog8658]

I remember that theme being a lot more clear in the books.

[@valolafson6035]

​@@kdog8658 That's the problem though. The movie has to stand on it's own.

[@cur1ouscatf1sh]

Bella’s brain is just the mii channel theme 24/7 and Edward cannot figure out why. This is canon now and no one can tell me otherwise

[@Cherrie_likes_A]

Do u know her channel got terminated

[@tea120]

They absolutely missed the amazing opportunity to give Jasper a real intense southern accent 😂

[@burdeegirl]

I'm guessing the guy who played him isn't great at accents.

[@zombiefvckerr]

insert steve martin as orin in little shop of horrors here

[@valolafson6035]

He had an accent sometimes.

[@Zelologist]

don’t worry, in the books (i read all of them 😅) bella literally thinks nothing but “he’s so pretty”

[@vickyisntpicky]

"hes sparkly" 😍

[@godscomplex13]

Also in the cafeteria scene she goes like ‘they have such weird names’ when looking at them and Edward is having a mini-breakdown bc she’s staring at him and he can't read what she thinks. He’s brooding and all. And she’s like ‘lame names but they are kinda hot’ which is the least concerning thought anybody could have. It's one of my favourite little things fr

[@globetrekker86]

I can’t decide, who has the quote of the century: Bella or Anakin “I don’t like the rain. Any… cold… wet thing, I don’t really…” “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse, rough, and irritating… And it gets everywhere.”

[@jorenvanderark3567]

There are still 76 years left.

[@Sylvainjose-satoyumiyato]

​@jorenvanderark3567 oh god I don't want to be in my 90s at the end of the century. Oh god no no no no no PLEASE NO AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[@TheDeadPirateBob]

@@Sylvainjose-satoyumiyato I'd be 102. So it'd be a blessing I guess lmao.

[@skywalkerchick]

I mean, at least Anakin’s is a complete sentence.

[@lolcatz88]

To be fair, Inuyasha was asleep for 50 years and he was very immature and uncouth. Their relationship took quite a long time to develop over the series, plus they didn’t do much other than kiss once or twice, and then they were separated until after she turned 18. I think it was very tastefully done personally.

[@beybladebaby]

a dark comedy about charlies life would be genuinely amazing to watch

[@MeeYeeWeeWee]

It should be called "It's Never Sunny In Forks"

[@doeknows]

I am begging you to make "A Day in the Life of Charlie Swan" a permanent fixture on your channel I was CRYING from laughing so hard.

[@r.h.1988]

For one of the movies, McDonalds had this big promotional thing where the packaging had peel off stickers that were like a sweepstakes? And the bags and signage were plastered with the question 'team edward or team jacob' and I vividly remember an old man at a McDonald's saying "edward? Jacob? Who are they and why should I even care? Can I be team leave me the f*ck alone?". The most surreal part was I was half asleep, waiting alone at the table wearing a fancy dress my mom had me change into because we were on the way to see the Seattle Ballets production of the Nutcracker my mom won tickets to in an essay contest. Oh, and the McDonalds was in the woods.

[@conifer27]

McDonald in the woods seems fake

[@r.h.1988]

@@conifer27 Not in the seattle area lol it was right off the road

[@jasperjazzie]

this sounds like a dream i would have that makes complete sense to me until i wake up and am like "wtf was that?"

[@mykal4779]

people are so hostile to things marketed towards young girls smdh

[@whatever9097]

Each sentence of this made it even funnier

[@_tripalong]

As a brazilian, I'm 1000% sure that they only made the Cullens go to Brazil to appeal to brazilian fans, which WORKED cause we were all bragging about it online 😂 but it makes ZERO sense bc the weather in Rio is sunny and hot af and they would sparkle all the time 😂😂😂😂

[@lottecooper4370]

I always just assumed that it was because the Cullens' friends are from Brazil but all the other theories are so much more funny

[@billieseyelashes]

😭

[@bleeka325]

They could have appealed to anybody from anywhere so why Brazil?

[@Ma-nm2fl]

​@@bleeka325 brazilians get Crazy when someone talks about brazil, like, wildly crazy

[@herlocksholmes-uv5qw]

​@@bleeka325You clearly haven't seen a Brazilian seeing Brazil mentioned in any sort of media, positively or negatively, and how vocal they get about it. I see it as a marketing strategy

[@One-of-many-names]

My dad said he would disowned me if I watched Twilight I still have never watched Twilight so now I gotta know how someone who did watch it feels about it.

[@Official_Twistanity]

It’s t i m e

[@liallialcroc]

thats some heavy misogyny on his part wtf(i never said these movies werent misogynistic, lol i like to laugh at these movies, thats why i enjoy them)

[@Avi-tq6fd]

​@@liallialcrocmisogyny? More like extreme cliché, the movie is

[@DirtyNeuronXIII]

your dad sounds like a really wise man

[@abbyz13]

you care whether or not your dad disowns you? crazy

[@lyras.9161]

"Would you still love me if I was a worm?" I choked, that almost killed me.

[@mia_seym]

Jasper is so relatable. As someone who had to quit drinking in a very alcohol-heavy culture, but still had to be around it constantly. Facing the thoughts, cravings, and pressure to "just have one" by every drunk person around takes so much strength. But all you can do is sit there and fight your urges sometimes. Jasper, you've got this.

[@AnnaCurrotto-zr8wv]

I know I'm just a random person on youtube commenting this, but, I know you've got this!! You also gotta take it one step and day at a time and soon it won't be as hard of a struggle as it was 💜💜💜

[@mia_seym]

Anna, you're right. I am 8 month sober in a few days, and it honestly hasn't been too terrible for me after the first bit of it all. The past ⅔ of a year have ended up being plenty of art, drawing, and working but out of passion. I even decided to start making KZbin content about a week ago. I sort of assume you're sober too, because we tend to be very supportive to each other on the internet. But whether or not you are, as one random person on the internet to another, thank you for the support and comfort, and you've got your this too!

[@AnnaCurrotto-zr8wv]

@@mia_seym thank you and congrats on 8 months! I definitely will be subscribing to you💜

[@Shlogger]

you're both great!

[@ElkorGod]

43 days w out it today, & I agree. Abstaining from temptation is horribly difficult but also a display of insane moral resolve. Cheers to sobriety!

[@dynosgarcia7645]

I'm having an existential crisis on how much of an anime Twilight actually is

[@sarafelix5081]

btw, I would watch a twilight anime lol

[@sloppytightbottom]

Indeed, however, Bella's too old! In a proper anime adaption she'd be no more than 14 years old.

[@tsubakiofmelancholy6297]

@@sarafelix5081 Well, not really Twilight like fully. There is a good manga / anime about a teen getting involved with vampires. The main vampire having a conflict with a werewolf because of the human teen, and another vampire character who may actually be gay for the human teen, lowkey yandere. The only problem I see that you may not like, is its about guys. No actual romance, at least not yet in the manga. But heavy hints of bromance.

[@that_dam_baka]

​@@tsubakiofmelancholy6297 Drop the name!

[@that_dam_baka]

​@@sloppytightbottom Josei or otome isekai then. We're keeping the age though.

[@Useruser444-n2c]

Charlie congratulated Jacob for sexually assaulting Bella and breaking her hand in the process. He’s a cop. If that is how he treats his own daughter, how do you think the other victims of crime were treated?

[@keila347]

Oof... I forgot about the congratulations, yiiikes 😨

[@Naptosis]

​​He was probably ecstatic that someone else would possibly look after his screaming daughter, that once spent 6 months staring at pigeons because she was depressed that a man so old he probably spooges cobwebs, ghosted her. That's a lot for someone employed full time to take.

[@5bc500]

@ElizabethWebb-zc3cpi think its like a motorcycle scene if that helps your memory but im not sure either

[@mulethedonkey2579]

@@Naptosis "thank you for assaulting my daughter, now I can get some sleep" would be a batshit take for a dad to have

[@Naptosis]

@@mulethedonkey2579 To be fair to him, that's probably the right thing to say/think if you're talking to an immortal, telepathic, vampire, that hasn't already made a 'bonus hole' in yours & your daughter's coconuts to get at the delicious strawberry milk inside. Though I may be being anachronistic; I don't know if her dad knew at this point (or ever found out) that Eddie the Ego is a vamp.

[@melbean5003]

You know when you discover a youtuber you really like and binge all of their content like it’s the office for the 4th time and find a gem like this. Gabi this video is hilarious. I really appreciate the skits, especially the Charlie pov. I absolutely love love love your content ^^

[@ItsMursha]

IT'S HERE IT'S HERE TEAM CHARLIE WE STAN!!! One thing I forgor to mention in our talk - this was a huge era of "not like other girls" tropes with Bella fitting that perfectly so naturally it appealed to the adolescent female audience of the time 😵‍💫

[@GoToBedJoffrey]

Oh absolutely. I thought I was quirky and different for being rather quiet and not wearing makeup (because I was and still am too lazy for that). Really glad I grew out of that 😂

[@cassandrashelton3690]

Nailed it

[@Silviecka]

Remember there was also the group of not like other girls who disliked twilight saga, because it was popular. I was one of them -_- luckily grew out of my cringy teen angst

[@OnlyTAS]

✨ I'm not like other girls ✨ ~ girl that is exactly like the others

[@melissarump7281]

*Bella jumps* “would you still love me if I were a worm?” 🤣 I lost it!!

[@AB2B]

Charlie is *truly* the MVP of this entire series. Poor guy deserves several million dollars from the Cullens for emotional damage.

[@user-wi9hv2pb2q]

Maybe for himself. His daughter has no thoughts or emotion.

[@jadeitetv]

i was cry laughing the whole time, your editing kills me

[@alexlazzerly3677]

One thing I genuinely appreciated about the series was how each movie had different directors with vastly different styles. It kept things fresh in my opinion.

[@rintonkatsu5203]

Wait .. each movie had a different director!? Why am I just now learning this

[@soymikleo]

fr the titles all had distinct aesthetics like u could identify which movie it was based on the filter

[@lotusrr]

@@soymikleofr, imo the colors/directing style of the first movie wouldn’t have worked for the movies after that. i personally really love how the colors in new moon look, especially the chase scene with victoria and the pack in the forest + the song is so good

[@krono5el]

@@rintonkatsu5203 guess it really didnt make a difference : P

[@charley15z17]

Yup. Catherine Hardwick made a moody indie film, Chris Weitz treated it almost like a fairytale, David Slade went for straightforward horror, and Bill Condon was sort of a mix of all of them.

[@jessieBird96]

Bella wasn't having nightmares because Edward dumped her, she was having nightmares because a vampire tortured her and then bit her literally a month or two before Edward left

[@awkwardotter13]

Thank you! I was looking for a comment about it because I had totally forgotten about it and seeing it brought up in the video made me do a double take XD

[@kawaiicat2424]

Thank you I said the same thing in another comment She almost died and is traumatized

[@maripaura4945]

I got no clue how I'd never figured that out before! You're a genius!🤯

[@cantdecideausername8584]

Was that from the movie or books? I don't remember

[@kawaiicat2424]

@@cantdecideausername8584 both

[@skyesimplyliving9086]

“ be normal, be normal be normal be normal be normal…. Nailed it” made me spit my water out You are a gift to KZbin

[@natalieturner6839]

"would you still love me if I was a worm?"BAHAHAHA HAS ME ROLLING ON THE FLOOR

[@izzy990]

Fun fact, while it's true that Fifty Shades of Grey was based off of Twilight it actually goes back way further than that, all the way to 9/11. So in 2001 A guy named Gerard Way was on a ferry and watched the twin towers fall, he was so torn up and traumatised about it he started writing out his feelings and it eventually led to him and his brother starting the band My Chemical Romance. The band was pretty popular amongst teens and had lots of fan fiction written about them, one day Stephanie Meyers decided to get in on the action and write some vampire au fan fiction and eventually changed it a little and published it as the Twilight series. Then along came E.L. James who wrote some more fan fiction (this time it was an office au based on Twilight) and it became the horrible representation of BDSM relationships formally known as Fifty Shades of Grey. So yeah, the twin towers falling caused Fifty Shades of Grey to be created

[@decium1846]

It's like one of those serendipity movies where a chain of seemingly unconnected random events cause a tragedy.

[@ranpo-irl]

I thought you were joking when I read “gerard way” but I actually cant tell if youre being serious or not

[@bee-ow5li]

oh i saw that tiktok too!

[@sharkbelly1169]

And Pattinson starred in that movie where he dies in the twin towers.

[@DH-dl3ll]

To be fair, my family moved to a small town (smaller than Forks, WA) when I was in junior high. Nearly all of the kids were born and raised there so any new person attracted massive attention until the newness wore off. Maybe that's what was happening to Bella?

[@sarahm8657]

I think that's definitely it! I'm from a town of 1000 people and it was like that even in high school when new people moved there.

[@DH-dl3ll]

@@sarahm8657 OMG 1000! We only had about 2500, I can't imagine less than half of that 😹😹 small towns are something!

[@Naptosis]

​@@sarahm8657​ 1,000 people! Did people, you know ))(( and then find out they were siblings!? 😬 There must have been SO much gossip! There were 1,000 kids/adults in just my school, and the girl's school next to us somehow knew my name (which I hated lol). There must be some awesome things about living in a tiny village though? Surely?

[@5bc500]

@@sarahm8657the amount of kids in my high school was over 1000. i cant even imagine

[@Katsandkatsandkats]

Very true. This happened to me when I was the new kid in a small school. After a few weeks everyone had adjusted and no longer cared though lmao

[@JaspersSpace]

Your "day in the life of Charlie Swan" with Bella's screams in the background made me laugh so hard that I physically fell over while trying to do dishes, holy shit

[@ABCQTBREB]

i don't believe you

[@Mozzarella-and-Tomato]

The music at 1:44 almost made me choke my salad, WHY IS IT SO FUNNY

[@katuni08]

I was in my “cute death/goth” phase when Twilight started getting popular. I was looking for a vampire series to read when I saw the commercial for the movie. Twilight was never a romance for me, it was straight horror. I never understood how people fell for these toxic characters, I thought that was the point! I read the whole series before the movie even came out and I still feel nostalgic for the series. Team Mike all the way. Poor dude never stood a chance. Also, the Edward enjoying the throuple thing isn’t too far off. In the final book, he mentions letting Bella have “puppies” with Jacob as a “safer” alternative to a half-vampire baby.

[@George-of1hq]

huh?

[@HayLeesHomeMade]

​@@George-of1hqto keep Bella safe from the vampire counsel (i don't remember what they're really called but i don't care enough to look) because having a half vampire baby is illegal, Edward wanted to have Jacob be the baby daddy but Edward would have custody although i guess there's the chance that it would be shared custody idk I'm ace i don't know this shit

[@ToxicSunrise132]

I remember reading the fourth book and assuming for most of it that the ending was going to be a throuple/threesome. It felt like the way the writing was heading, with Jacob and Edward burying the hatchet. I remember thinking "This is a bit of a cop-out, but eh, I always liked Jacob better. I could be okay with this" Then Bella had her daughter. Still one of the strangest "jump the shark" moments I've ever seen.

[@PaperLoser-gv4wb]

Who’s Mike again?

[@Miroslava_Ivanova]

​@@HayLeesHomeMadeIt was actually because the baby was going to kill her when she was giving birth. The rule the Volturi had was to not turn children into vampires, as they're incredibly hard to control, iirc, but because Renesmee was actually half vampire half human she didn't break the rule.

[@glitzdancer]

The part that always gets me is she has legit reason for nightmares that cause blood curdling screams…she was literally almost killed by a vampire and started the process of changing which is canonically horrible amounts of pain. And it makes sense that they would come back now that she doesn’t feel protected surrounded by her own personal vampire coven… …but no. It’s because he broke up with her 🤣

[@kawaiicat2424]

I still think she has nightmares because of that I mean it never gets clarified what she dreams of and I mean she got tortured

[@I_am_a_cat_]

Its just such a slap in the face to anyone that has actual nightmares like that, too

[@WinterJMG]

Fun fact. She actually did all those dangerous things because whenever she would risk her life, he’d pop up to tell her to stop it because it’s too dangerous. She missed him and wanted to see him so she’d do crazy stuff so she could. Which is messed up because how do you move on from someone who keeps popping up out of no where lol

[@_tripalong]

She didn't wanna move on at all, she was always obsessed with him

[@Andydydydy]

He would pop up in her mind tho, not like physically 😭

[@adamprice3466]

I remember watching one of them with my gf and her friends. Bella wanted to be rebellious and live dangerously and she decides to ride a motorbike and the vampire ghost pops up like "NO DONT DO IT! ITS TOO DANGEROUS". Like come on bruh, it's just a dirtbike, she ain't skydiving.

[@dominika3762]

It sounds ridiculous

[@Pragabond]

I mean I don't think that's the messed up part. To me the messed up part is her doing wild shit to worry this man so he popped up to tell her to stupid. Imagine trying to move on from someone who keeps putting their life at risk to get your vampire attention

[@chronicallykelly7193]

Girl Idk how or why I found this video all this time later, but I am so glad that I clicked it this morning 😂 Loving A Day in the Life of Charlie Swan 😂😂😂

[@HappyCabezonFish-je4tk]

Me too😅

[@chronicallykelly7193]

@@HappyCabezonFish-je4tk him in the fridge with Bella's screams in the background... 💀💀💀😂

[@subliminalrats]

Happy to report that Team Charlie is still alive and well in gen z! In February the actor who played Charlie came to visit a teen theater group I was part of and literally everyone was freaking out like "omg it's Charlie he's literally the best character and he's soo hot holy shit!" I'm not kidding

[@Aster_Risk]

I love this. I'm 32, and as a teenager when these movies were out I felt like I was the only one who was team Charlie.

[@Breexbloodlust]

@@Aster_Risk now that I'm in my 30s, I'm team charlie lol

[@sarapowers8827]

​@@Aster_Risk32 as well. You weren't alone

[@hello.amberbutterfly]

I'm 26, team charlie all the way ❤

[@Frogs_Asmr]

After years, I still can’t wrap my head around how Jasper went to an all-human high school, yet couldn’t contain himself around one human. (Bella)

[@Ohgodpleasedonteekeek]

Because she just “smells so good”

[@Ohgodpleasedonteekeek]

I think it’s more of the self insert character thing and being “different” than other girls

[@OtakuNoShitpost]

Compartmentalization, really. It's like how stuff that's normal at work can put you off at home

[@alpaca6462]

So it's explained better in the book! Jasper's power is not only to influence other people's emotions, but he also can feel the emotions of people around him. So in the scene when he's freaking out, he's surrounded in a room of vampires that are all thirsting after Bella's finger cut (reminder that canonically Bella has some weird thing where her blood is super tasty because of course she does). Now individually they all can control their thirst, but Jasper is feeling the thirst of seven vampires at once. Normally at school, there's so many human kids and the Cullens go to school fed on animal blood so he doesn't struggle with thirst there. Hope that helps

[@Craigskaters]

Bella only "smells super good" to Edward. Not the other vampires. But, yeah...

[@claramello6282]

i watched the twilight saga when i was younger waaaaaay before i knew i was a lesbian and i was on the boat of wanting bella and alice to interact more and couldn't figure out why? Turns out i was team alice

[@vee1267]

Alice was by far the best character anyways, because she actually had a personality

[@nobodyshekatonchires]

Would have been a better twist. Alice, Bella, and Jasper

[@asmrtpop2676]

@@nobodyshekatonchiresWhy you gotta bring the freaking confederate into the relationship

[@ABCQTBREB]

​@@nobodyshekatonchires nobodys he kat on chires nobody she katon chires nobodys hekat onchires

[@robthevampireslayer3211]

Nobody asked you.

[@finneas1655]

I think probably the number one issue with the movies is that in the process of cutting down things from the books to make it fit into a digestible movie, they cut things that were actually pretty important to understanding parts of the movie.

[@sheepsky]

I was actually 8 in 2008, Gabi. And yes I did pretend to be a Vampire after watching it.

[@abbyz13]

after i watched h2o i convinced other 6th graders i was a mermaid

[@mosstits]

just gotta say people born in 2000 dont need to subtract/add to calculate their age for certain years and thats pretty cool

[@Amandasbarros]

Same! I loved it so much lol, I pretended to be a werewolf after the new moon. These movies occupies such a important and special place in my heart

[@goldenageofdinosaurs7192]

@@abbyz13When I was 5, I watched Rudolph the red nosed reindeer & the next day, I told everyone in my class that, from this day forward m, my name was now Rudolph🤣

[@LukeSky2207]

@@mosstits any year, btw.

[@MeCooper]

Honestly Kirsten Stewart was the perfect actor for the role. She does an extremely convincing job of portraying somebody with absolutely no personality.

[@hotmilo]

Really hard to read someone's thoughts when they don't have any.

[@MeCooper]

@@hotmilo lol Very true, I imagine it would just sound like TV static. ... Fk, I just realised I'm so old TV static doesn't even exist anymore. Trust me, It's a great joke!

[@hotmilo]

@@MeCooper 😹 It's surprising how many people listen to static to help them fall asleep. Probably why dads usually fall asleep in the couch in older movies.

[@MeCooper]

@@hotmilo lmfao My god that was savage! 11/10

[@Breexbloodlust]

omg yes

[@nicolcacola]

I personally love how Bellas's mouth opens and closes like a guppy the entire saga. Literally unforgettable acting...this movie will live rent free in my head until I die..."sigh*.

[@katherinesmallbean3594]

Comparing it to a guppy is so accurate and it has me in stitches

[@user-wi9hv2pb2q]

😂

[@morestereo]

i cAN NOT believe you’d call supermassive black hole by muse some random “weird guitar music” lmao the music (and that leg thing alice does) are the only things that made that whole scene “iconic” 😅

[@elliewellie_YouTube]

My boyfriend saw twilight for the first time last year because I made him. He's an unironic fan now and we are both team Jacob. They're my favorite good bad movies.

[@hearmyselfthink]

Good way to put it - good bad movies

[@-piras]

team charlie all the way

[@halatiny6537]

Mr fell in love with an infant Jacob?

[@abbyz13]

what’s your take on him SA-ing her along with “she doesn’t know what she wants” 😐

[@edwardcullenasseater]

Team Jacob….concerning morals

[@averyeml]

I think it’s funny you used an Inuyasha connection because I do think Twilight is, like, backwards isekai. Instead of being dumped, often alone, into a magical world, Bella is instead getting to be the special person in the comfort of her normal world with magical things choosing to bring her into it because she’s extra special. It’s like isekai with more steps 😂

[@Breexbloodlust]

yes lol

[@melow5142]

And it's Reverse Harem because everyone drools over Bella

[@hypercube8735]

@@melow5142 Isekai anime back in the 90s and early 2000s was traditionally female-centered (Inuyasha, Escaflowne, Fushigi Yuugi were all very popular, and you also had other stuff like Twelve Kingdoms). "I'm a regular girl from modern-day Japan who's been transported to another world/another time/an alternate fantasy version of historical Japan and I have multiple hot guys who want to protect me (and they also usually fight over my romantic attention)" was also a staple of the genre. That's the original kind of isekai harem, nothing "reverse" about it.

[@guggelguggel7491]

Maybe Im misremembering but wasnt Inuyasha in a coma/sealed away for like, eighty something years? So I always figured they were the same age, he was just chronologically ~100 but still mentally about her age.

[@hypercube8735]

@@guggelguggel7491 iirc Inuyasha is mentally like 16 but physically like 200 because being half-youkai does weird things to your development. Which, of course, means Kagome will rapidly outpace him in mental and emotional maturity and basically spend the rest of her life married to a teenager.

[@christian3255]

I've only been watching this channel for like a week, but Gabi Belle as Charlie is something I didn't realize I needed/wanted in my life. I am whole now having seen this video

[@christian3255]

33:14 made me unwhole again, my eyes hate me for seeing that

[@scottathan8641]

Gabi, I was having a bit of a rough one today but this video from 7 months ago turned it around. You're becoming my favorite youtuber recently!

[@candy_pandas6826]

I actually kind of liked the time skip in new moon where they just showed months passing. As someone with depression, when you’re in the lows, it really just feels like months pass without you noticing and you look up one day and realise you’ve been going through the motions for five months and you don’t remember the changing seasons. It was one of the only seems I think they did well

[@amydyson3902]

fully agree with this one

[@dragonlord8655]

Edward: "You love him" Bella: "I love you more" DM: Roll charisma Bella: *rolls a nat 20* Edward: "I know" Other players: *gets up and leaves*

[@Dewani90]

The moment i see them roleplaying twilight i just get up and leave, unless it is my house, then they can leave.

[@SarahBullard-c4l]

I admit I was 45 and in rehab when I watched these movies. Bella had no personality. I kept waiting for character development but it never happened. "Girl's are jealous of me. All boy's want me. I only like rich sparkling boy's. I'm totally shallow and I never get less shallow over 5 movies."

[@user-wi9hv2pb2q]

Idk I felt that she got a lot more selfish as time went on.

[@OnlyTAS]

​@@user-wi9hv2pb2q ​*is literally engaged* omg dog friendzone boy kiss me

[@MayaParker01]

I love that Bella practically webmd’s her way to the vampire conclusion

[@im_an_oyster]

I showed my roommate's cat the whole twilight saga and his favorite was the first one. So obviously he's a man of taste.

[@dgscorner]

I remember during the start of the Twilight Saga craze during 2008. It cost around Php500.00 in 2008 here in the Philippines (around $50 now in today's value). I was a broke high school student then, but I really wanted to own that book. So I said to my mother that we had to buy a scientific calculator for school. When I came back home, she saw that I had bought the book Twilight, and she scolded me 😂 Funniest story I heard though is about this classmate of mine who bought Twilight because he thought it was for a book report. We had to read like a book every two weeks at the time, and he saw everyone reading it in class. He read the book in 2 days and had a book report ready because he bought it so late. The face he had when he saw everyone was reading it for the fun of it was priceless.

[@Snakeplisskin440]

I'm crying 🤣"I had one margarita and wrote this skit and I literally do not know where I was going with it." I've never seen this series and don't think I ever will watch it but Gabi your different acting roles had me rolling.

[@emmavrijburg6676]

give her one margarita she will make you a skit

[@Sabrina-sc1db]

give her two margaritas she will post an unhinged review of the twilight saga

[@pressplayulysses]

Three margaritas and you get a full-length Charlie Swan skit.

[@emmavrijburg6676]

give her four margaritas she will change the entire color pallete per movie she reviews

[@mikeya.2742]

i felt so bad for charlie in new moon. mans probably thought it'd be smooth sailing and quiet nights when his kid stopped wearing diapers but no the baby still won't sleep through the night at 18 [months] years old. rip charlie's sleep schedule

[@4_Raven_3]

Fr tho , that poor man

[@pacomg_2553]

The fact that MCR preferred to sing in simlish rather than do the OST of the movie is truly one of the events in all time

[@noonie6872]

By accounts of other artists, singing in simlish is actually really fun so this might not be a good comparison

[@emilyb.8219]

They missed out tbh, the Twilight soundtrack is a certified banger

[@AuroraC42]

It really is though, like I regularly listen to it because it's just that good. And fun fact, so is the 50 Shades of Grey OST lol. Excellent music. @@emilyb.8219

[@BleachBasket108]

@@emilyb.8219 you can't beat supermassive blackhole

[@mastermarkus5307]

Respect.

[@hollydawn07]

I was already 23 when the first one came out so I was a little too old to be obsessed with it…but my kid wanted to watch the a few years ago so we did. We binged all the movies in one day. It was unbelievably cringe and amazing and hilarious and fantastic. The end fight/vision sequence made us both scream and I am forever sad that I didn’t see it in theaters when it came out.

[@asthenolith]

I remember the whole theater freaking out during that scene in BD2 🥴

[@HollyRoarborn]

My sister once told me when she was in college, the people living next to her in the dorms left for a trip. The entire weekend, their TV was playing the title screen music of Twilight on repeat, day and night. She could hear it through her wall and it was one of the most frustrating situations.

[@Poisonousivie]

my sister had the same thing happen but with frozen 😭

[@StormyTalks]

The scene of her in front of the window month by month by month was so much sadder to me in the book. It made me cry.

[@hazey_dazey]

Idk if this was omitted for comedy reasons or if it doesn't come across as well in the movies (i only read the books), but the reason Edward seems to enjoy getting cucked is cuz he doesn't want Bella to become a vampire. He was actually hoping that she would stay human long enough to outgrow him (bc he is pertually 17-brained). So he loves her and wants to be with her, but also wants her to be with Jacob, bc if she dated Jacob she would stay human.

[@Lxx00Jxx00]

that was always my interpretation of the saga honestly that's pretty on point for a vampire drama, the impossible love, seeing your loved one dying of old age, but it is so cringe (sometimes a good bad cringe)

[@Reefir_]

Why is he “17-brained” ? Does being turned vampire at age 17 make him forever 17 mentally too? Does the years not make him wiser? I watched this movie as a child before and I dont even remember the story anymore

[@kewwymode]

@@Reefir_yeah they explain at some point that whatever age you’re turned into a vampire at, you’re basically frozen in time at that age including your mental age. So yeah he’s had a lot of life experiences from living so long, but he still and forever will have the emotional and illogical brain of a 17 year old boy lol.

[@anothercub6958]

The hell!? A story following this would've been cooler!

[@lizthedisjointedzebra692]

i'm surprised you didn't pick up on Stephanie Meyer taking a LOT of details from Inuyasha. The love triangle among a human, werewolf, and demon/vampire. And the Volturi are basically a repeat of Naraku, Kagura, and Kanna(and hilariously, the three's personalities are repeated, too, zero imagination behind the Volturi lol)

[@bethwalker2301]

I'm slightly ashamed that I never connected the two and am appreciative to see it here in this video. I was dying seeing the references and connecting the dots 🥲

[@eleanormason2647]

Something tells me that Stephanie Meyers, uber mormon, isn't watching anime or reading manga

[@lizthedisjointedzebra692]

@@eleanormason2647 you never know

[@jbmp1390]

White people are generally incapable of actual creativity. When you're entire culture is built on stealing from others, it becomes the norm. Media like this should be vilified from it's very start due to the fact that it's disingenuous. Also, it's extremely sad that twilight is the vector through which many young women seem to initially consider their sexuality because it's an ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE example of how relationships should be. It's basically an entire series about how emotionally and otherwise abusive relationships are somehow "Deep" when in reality they're the opposite. Female sexuality should be about EMPOWERMENT and PERSONAL CHOICE, not about putting up with some abusive loser because he's "mysterious" or "damaged". Then let him go deal with his damage and he can date you when he's learned how to treat women with decency and respect. Mormons shouldn't be allowed to write books. Or exist at all.

[@richborn6700]

​@@eleanormason2647no she's just writing her vampire sex fantasy stories

[@toomuchsoda8184]

I rewatched twilight recently and I thought the coolest thing was the blue-greyish color grading and general ambience of the movie. Love the hazy atmosphere, reminded me of twin peaks

[@littlemissmello]

I agree! I unironically think the first one was good. Encapsulates teenage angst perfectly. It's goofy in the way that teenagers are goofy. The other movies are goofy in a different way and feel much more testosterone heavy. Still funny but not of qUaliTy

[@jitterbugg2]

love twin peaks❤️

[@pspsora]

this video is so funny. the messed up music is making me pee my pants. yes bella googled "is my crush a vampire" LOLOLOL

[@RPGLover87]

Imagine if Bella had used the oldest term. "You're..." "Say it." "An apotemkin...." "What? -_0"

[@Breexbloodlust]

lmao right

[@cybercab]

Fun Fact: It didn’t age poorly. You’re older now and realize how bad it was. Lol.

[@sallijunttila3006]

it got too much hate tho, just because so many teen girls liked it :(

[@princembat]

@@sallijunttila3006 at the time it came out it got hate because teenage girls liked it, now it gets hate because we are all realizing its just bad lol

[@sallijunttila3006]

​@@princembat okay fairr, but there's still SOME redeemable qualities lol I'm just sad it came out right as my "not like other girls" phase was at its peak and I know I would've eaten it uppp :'D

[@kyosxmatriarchy]

​@@sallijunttila3006haha?

[@justineberlein5916]

​@@sallijunttila3006 Yep. Like, sure, there are definitely some questionable elements like imprinting. But meanwhile, Ernest Cline wrote an entire book whose plot was "What if an obsessive knowledge of the male parts of 80s pop culture was exactly what was needed to save the world, and girls went out with me for it", and everyone gave him a pass because it was wish fulfillment... for boys

[@BadAthisOMG]

My first thought if I was Bella and this dude who is super cold, doesn’t go out in the sun, and looks lowkey dead would’ve been “Oh he’s anemic! Get urself some vitamin gummies bro!”

[@toricostin243]

The "oh, well imagine" definitely got a thumbs up from me lmaoo

[@chip5976]

My most embarrassing moment that often comes back to haunt me out of absolutely nowhere is being in elementary school reenacting the fight scene with james and edward in the first movie with my friends during recess 😭

[@fossilfighters101]

nononono thats beautiful

[@SupernovaTova93]

Honestly though you probably had so much fun

[@marshmallowbautista9559]

i wonder what the teachers who saw thought

[@Breexbloodlust]

i did that with pokemon & digimon as a kid lol

[@shamra1245]

When I was in kindergarten I reenacted Mario Party (the first one) minigames with my friend on the playground :3 Same vibes here!!!

[@pinguufuuuu]

i also think a good ol' peer pressure, boy craziness, and trends played a role in twilight's popularity. i remember being in middle school and everyone fighting over team edward or jacob. and EVERYONE was reading the books, including the teachers. i finally gave in one day because i wanted to be in the loop and be "cool" so i read up to chapter 17 in the first book, gave up, and went back to reading warrior cat books 💀 it was just not for me at the time. i never watched the movie until i became an adult and have only watched the first twilight movie, not the other ones. but i love seeing people review it it really is a great piece of human history. also i still don't understand why they're all focused on bella so much like what did she do? 😭😭

[@sa_kie]

I was a warrior cats kid in late elementary 😭 I can’t believe they’re still making those books lol 💀

[@shamra1245]

I LOVED the first series of Warrior cats!!!! I feel this though, the first person to tell me about Twilight was my seventh grade English teacher - I ended up just reading Anne Rice instead. Much more gay XD

[@UnsafeTuna]

I love your brand of comedic commentary. "And then they watched the entire saga" sums it up perfectly

[@goldenageofdinosaurs7192]

That was so perfect. I’ve lived that exact experience with so many different movies..

[@snippedtiex]

16:00 Imagine the moment camera turns to her face again on December, she has a party hat and a horn

[@Coffee_Bean08]

😂😂😂

[@nari5161]

I haven't seen the movies, only read the books, and she does dangerous things because it allows her to visualize Edward more intensely. Alice having a vision and Edward misunderstanding was an unintended consequence and not an intentional way to reach out to him on Bella's part.

[@TheLais17]

im brazilian so you can imagine how i (and every brazilian TWIHARD) felt when brazil got to be a part of the story. i remember writing in my diary that kristen and taylor were coming to brazil to promote new moon at almost the same time i was going on vacation catching my first ever flight at a huge international airport, THE SAME ONE THEIR PLANE WERE LIKE TWODAYS BEFORE. i can say confidently i almost had a stroke. anyway kristen turned out to be a huge part of my understanding that i like girls. i was at school once and my best friend at the time asked “if kristen appeared RIGHT NOW in front of you would you kiss her?” and i said “well yes” and credits roll im a lesbian.

[@tsohkurai]

20:04 “have you flossed today “ Okay that really took me out lmao

[@pia1769]

I was just flossing at that moment😂

[@drawhanidraw]

Ohh thank you, I misheard it as "Have you flopped today?" and was thinking damnn savage

[@pinkdragon4830]

1:56 the way he just ZOOMS out there😭😭