Gabor Mate: The Childhood Lie That’s Ruining All Of Our Lives. | E193

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The Diary Of A CEO

The Diary Of A CEO

Күн бұрын

Gabor Mate is a multi-bestselling author and a world leading expert on trauma and how it effects us throughout our whole lives. A holocaust survivor and a first generation immigrant, Gabor’s knowledge and wisdom on the scars trauma leaves behind is deep and drawn from personal experience.
0:00 Intro
02:04 Early context
08:16 How does someone correct their traumatic events?
09:33 How did your traumatic event show shape you?
14:54 What did you focus on in your career?
16:40 What did working with patients towards the end of their life teach you?
20:34 The importance of following our passion
27:13 The Myth Of Normal
30:57 How would our approaches change if we took away the concept of normal?
41:06 How parents behaviour can impact a child
44:27 How do you define trauma?
46:57 Does everyone have trauma?
50:51 Why can two people with the same trauma turn out differently?
01:01:44 Being controlled by our trauma
01:04:20 Do we ever cut the puppet master strings?
01:05:56 How does someone become more aware?
01:09:18 Addictions and how we develop them
01:13:28 How do we find our sense of worth?
01:14:05 Why is authenticity so important
01:18:51 Taking personal responsibility
01:20:09 The 5 Rs to take control of your life
01:26:36 ADHD
01:40:40 Do you think society is getting more toxic?
01:50:27 What are you still struggling with?
01:54:25 The last guest’s question
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Пікірлер: 6 300
@TheDiaryOfACEO Жыл бұрын
This is one of my top 3 favourite episodes of all time. Genuinely changed me. Please hit the like button on the video if you like this guest 🙏🏽
@BoxOfMarzipan Жыл бұрын
Steven, what are the other 2?
@AlwaysBeTheCurious1 Жыл бұрын
aka: "Therapy with a CEO"
@Allthesamesea Жыл бұрын
Bigger Chanel bigger guests? I think every guest you’ve had on here is as relevant and ultimately beneficial as anyone else who may ‘cost’ more. No human is bigger than another. We are the same sea.
@markbennett6367 Жыл бұрын
I've had to stop everything to listen to this one . And uncomfortable as it is, at the same time switching some mental lights on, there are so many pieces of life's jigsaw slotting into place .. I'm learning at high speed here.. Thank you..
@cloudtrifle Жыл бұрын
This podcast and the way Gabor describes trauma and you mention emotional wounds becoming the puppetmaster of our lives really reminds me of the podcast where you talked about the monkey brain side of us humans. How emotion controls so much of what we do. Awareness is the key thing people need to learn to heal on this, once you take a step back out of yourself and look at your life as an outsider, it is only then you start to see whats really happening and gain the ability to question, react without emotion and fix your problems.
@mikesheridan5218 Жыл бұрын
My father was prone to rage. Mum would often say we'd walk on eggshells around him. His anger could well up at any time and especially around practical things like mowing the lawn, packing the car or on the rare occasion when we went on holiday. He was a workaholic and moved us constantly for his "career". By the age of 15 we have moved 9 times and I went to seven different schools from the north of Scotland to the S East of England. To this day he sees it as our failing that my brother, sister & I didn't "do well" at school. I became a workaholic myself & know I was also trying to prove my worth and I carried a lot of learnt behaviors. I felt strongly that unless I carried a "big job title", made money, drove a big car and lived in a "good area" etc. I would never gain his respect or feel worthy. Bonkers I know! Thankfully I was able to stop, getting off the hampster wheel aged 57 when the doctor told me I was carrying critical hypertension. I've moved to North Devon to be by the sea, work part time and mostly ride my bicycle. I'm walking the SW coast path at weekends. I'm also trying to rediscovery my sense of self and what an authentic life looks like now. Good luck everyone.
@christynorman7288 Жыл бұрын
Mike Sheridan. Well done for stoically carrying on against the tide, I've been there and still struggling we are not alone! 👍 from SW England
@christynorman7288 Жыл бұрын
Thanks for support Mike. It all helps I didn't fully realise that they could bring you so low spiritually. Christy (SW England)
@8675-__ Жыл бұрын
I had a similar father. Prone to rage and violence. Always trying to be a big fish in a small pond! Moved us 30 times by age 16. Blamed me for all types of things (that we often never did). He finally threw us out one by one...which basically saved me and set me free. I became very successful once I got away from him. But I had to unlearn all the bad habits he taught us.
@leslielandberg5620 Жыл бұрын
Toxic parents really suck. It's especially difficult if there is no other adults around it all to provide any kind of support. I had to learn really early on in my life not to respect my parents or to trust them or to like them or need them for anything or to lose a moments sleep worrying about them. Thank God I made such great decisions as a little kid. One of my best moments was throwing them out on Christmas eve because they were disrespecting me and I was hosting and made the meal. I said you can come back tomorrow if you can behave yourselves. Believe it or not they came back the next day hat in hand. I still needed lots of therapy though LOL. Never being loved or feeling safe or that you can let your guard down take a toll on you.
@jamesgoetz4625 Жыл бұрын
@@leslielandberg5620 You threw you parents out as little kid? Man I wish I could have done that and sent them packing 😂. It's tough and so many of us effected but I think it is in big lie that been foisted on society to control us.
@grahamhiggs4355 7 ай бұрын
If parents stop loving their child, the child will continue to love it’s parents, but will stop loving itself.
@beefandbarley 4 ай бұрын
Ouch. Unfortunately true.
@MarcoSilesio 3 ай бұрын
that hits hard
@Justin-nu1oh 3 ай бұрын
Word up 💯
@kirstinstrand6292 3 ай бұрын
If parents stopped loving their child, they never loved it. Many parents lack empathy. It's possible to love oneself, ❤but you're correct about the empathic child never stops loving her mom. I think this is the deepest love. The mother wound is difficult to resolve, but possible. Keep working for personal resolution. The final step is to experience the Dark Night of the Soul. Then, when you say goodbye to everyone in your past, an invisible wall goes up so that your past is truly a different lifetime. None of this emotional work is easy.❤
@_Marina 3 ай бұрын
Well said. Thus, creating complicated PTSD from childhood, as a result from neglect and abuse (the lack of love, nurture, care, comfort and meeting the child's basic needs).
@Katrn30 5 ай бұрын
As a Palliative care nurse one of the best things I was told, was to live your life as if each day was your last. Because in reality we all think we have time…until we don’t.
@BeforeThisNovember 25 күн бұрын
But then we wouldn’t go to work or plan for our future.. the list goes on
@through.a.barrel.she.breathes Ай бұрын
Don’t ask why the addiction, ask why the pain ❤
@bobwoww8384 8 ай бұрын
Gabor Mate is a genuine pearl of humanity. His intention is beyond exceptional? He deserves a Nobel prize awarded
@annaweiers2947 Ай бұрын
He is better than the elitist Nobel prize club
@theresiafriesinger5368 Ай бұрын
I agree!
@79eyre 9 ай бұрын
When he says: Who told you are not worthy? and then: You deserve that sense of worthiness...I start crying...As I never heard these words before!
@user-do3qz7kt2m 8 ай бұрын
Good for you ,moving forward with confidence ❤from Australia 🇦🇺
@user-do3qz7kt2m 8 ай бұрын
You have truth to hold on to❤
@doctorjekyll6125 8 ай бұрын
I have felt worthless all of my life. Nothing like a pos father telling their son, he is a loser. Such a fantastic feeling to carry.
@mizt7643 6 ай бұрын
I cannot remember a time when I felt worthy just as I am. I've always been told I'm too much (insert bad thing)/not enough (insert good thing). So, I have consistently felt intrinsically and irredeemable flawed
@camc3640 4 ай бұрын
@79eyre...Now you did and that might be a start of your own inner healing journey. Continue and learn how to love for real. Godspeed.
@18eleanor 8 ай бұрын
Tears came to my eyes when he said he sat there and listened to the people who were dying because people who are dying want to be heard. I've waited my whole life to be heard and I hope that I get heard on my deathbed. What a wonderful gift. He is amazing.
@celestemetcalfe3527 5 ай бұрын
The internal pain of not being heard is horrendous . I know 💔 My wish for you is that can sit with someone and have your words heard and understand your trauma ……its poisoning to the physical mental and spiritual ❤
@robynhope219 5 ай бұрын
I was lucky enough be heard by my second husband. We're a perfect match, alas, he was a lot older than me and died, but I can say HE REALLY HEARD ME AND HELPED ME...and I did the same for him, love ❤u Herb!
@celestemetcalfe3527 5 ай бұрын
@@robynhope219 What a spiritual journey you’ve achieved……so happy for you ❤️
@robynhope219 5 ай бұрын
@@celestemetcalfe3527 thank u!
@camc3640 4 ай бұрын
Pls do not wait to your death bed. Write, talk, listen to yourself and to your body, cry, heal, love so that you can live all days as happy ones.💌
@maryottlinger8968 9 ай бұрын
Thank you Gabor. And the early 2000s I was taking care of my nephew who was labeled at school with ADHD. At that time I was into nutrition and decided to make better food choices. No more sugar cereals started his day with a good breakfast oatmeal, fresh fruit. Eggs and better lunch choices. After a few weeks, I have better food choices. He was much better in school. In fact, his teacher thought he was on medication. I told her no I just changed his diet. I’m glad I did. He turned out to be 6 foot 10 healthy and love in his heart.
@cj3720 9 ай бұрын
Oatmeal is not much better than sugar cereals. Read the labels for the amount of empty carbs in processed oatmeal.
@__Ess 8 ай бұрын
@@cj3720 the empty carbs may not be best but it’s better than a bowl full of sugar, e numbers and chocolate not to mention they’ll actually be fuller for longer to
@xingyuyaomt-bc6592 8 ай бұрын
School offers ADHD label too easily.
@kevinansley2087 8 ай бұрын
@@cj3720 Minutia?
@jomartalanegra9438 8 ай бұрын
The secret ingredient ❌ in his auntie's breakfast was ❤ love.
@spambot_gpt7 8 ай бұрын
The social structure of school is like prison. - Painfully boring schedule - One random peer group that is inescapable - No shared goals, only rivalry - Crabs in a bucket mentality, constant bullying - Authority unable to stop the bullying The result is a grinding machine that kills time and creativity.
@camc3640 4 ай бұрын
Indeed.The whole school system is traumatizing as are certain 'working systems'. Power over..doesn't work so well. Pls Check also i.e. Thomas Hübl's work about collective trauma.
@ziphono 4 ай бұрын
So spot on!
@daisydriver5877 4 ай бұрын
So true abt school. I didn't get much out of it. I don't think either of my 3 boys did. One bears intractable mental and emotional scars. One mostly worked thru HS and barely passed. Now an over-achiever. Another dropped out but is doing fine now...despite many emotional traumas. All of it I see as my mother's and my grandmother's emotional unavailability. At 77+ I am just seeing myself in living color for the first time!
@ezlow1065 4 ай бұрын
You got that right! well said! 👍
@adrianjohnson7920 4 ай бұрын
@@camc3640 I was a clever, only, child from an (already) already disfunctional family. My mother always pressured me to achieve in school, but I couldn't muster motivation to pay attention to subjects I didn't like. Once, for reasons I can't explain, I made a straight A report card. My mother was over the moon because I had "performed." Her bragging to others disgusted me. Something in me rebelled at "performing" to please a parent I couldn't trust or respect, so I recall resolving wordlessly that this mustn't happen again. I became a master of passive aggression My mediocre grades from then on meant I didn't get a scholarship to University, though I went. Away from home I became an "unexpected success" in a field which my mother didn't value. Years before she died, she told me with sorrow what a disappointment I'd been to her. I "divorced" her, only sending Christmas & birthday cards from then on; nor did I go to her funeral. One of the best decisions of my life.
@littleredsproutingkate 9 ай бұрын
my best friend recommended Dr Mate’s book to me last winter. After years of trying to fix myself, I finally realised what was wrong with me. You see, I was a very sick baby living in a polluted area, so my parents made the difficult choice and left me with grandparents who lived in a countryside. I grew up being an insecure workaholic addicted to proving my worth. I’m 40 now and realising I F am enough. We all are! Take care 🤗
@successblueprintinstitute 8 ай бұрын
His book on addiction really helped me get out of that rut. I read his book on parenting when I became a father. I am very grateful to have found out about this man. MY relationship with my children is great. Thank you Gabor!
@mariaolszowska3935 6 ай бұрын
And what is the title of his book on parenting?
@successblueprintinstitute 6 ай бұрын
@@mariaolszowska3935 “hold on to your kids “
@SupereagleChannel 11 ай бұрын
So this man is saying you provide a safe, nurturing, environment for kids in their first 3 years you can change the world... This is a gift
@extremeresponsibility4325 10 ай бұрын
Well done. Janet Hogan, the 5th Door, has a practical program to do this
@jeannemarkham1149 9 ай бұрын
How is this news?
@mariashevyrova3730 9 ай бұрын
do it for yourself every day, then your kids will be happy. FOR YOURSELF
@cj3720 9 ай бұрын
First 7 years.
@79eyre 9 ай бұрын
I think he is fully right
@andys7937 4 ай бұрын
As someone who is training in Craniosacral therapy, I'm so happy to hear Gabor mention it here. I haven’t heard it mentioned much by trauma experts. It's so gentle, calming and perfect for all ages and conditions. Thank you ❤
@gillianestephensonpianopie2926 3 ай бұрын
At 75 of loved years I still weep when I watch your interviews with Gabor Mate You have a wonderful steady way of talking to this fragile wise therapist Well done and thank you
@RobbieRobot. 6 ай бұрын
I have a friend who tells me all the time "there are people out there worse off them me, i dont have truma, i don't have ptsd, i havent hurt enough" We medicaded ourselfs with drugs and booze and within all the conversations we had i saw her truma and after very slowly and steadily telling her that truma isn't the same for everyone and that we don't get yo choose when it happens she finally realised why she was angry and scared. Shes now in a loving relationship and she recognises when her emotions are more then they should be. Just like myself. It's ok, everyone can feel hurt and its ok your not alone ❤ don't disregard your own pain just because you feel its not enough pain to be painful. Everyone deserves to feel safe and healed, everyone! If you can ask for help do it ❤❤
@kathleenmorabito4477 9 ай бұрын
This man, Gabor, is literally saving my life. He’s helping me see. I need to figure out how to handle my surges of anger while identifying the origins of my beliefs that still affect me in my 60’s.
@user-cd8mh4mk9u 18 күн бұрын
Well said, Thank You 4 trying...❤
@keyfiender799 8 ай бұрын
Extensive studies on Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) were completed in the late 90s. We say we care - but actually we don't. Because if we did, we'd all know the situation is desperate and we'd do more to protect children.
@Kraypaper 2 ай бұрын
There is no collective "we" when it comes to child-rearing. Some individuals care and do better. Some are unconscious and perpetuate trauma.
@keyfiender799 2 ай бұрын
@@Kraypaper The "we" I meant was, society as a whole and all individuals in it. We are all responsible for keeping children safe.
@terrycox2532 10 ай бұрын
I read 'The Inner Child' book 20 years ago and it changed my life. I did the excercise where the adult you approaches and wrapts their arms around their child at its most vulnerable point. This is hard, the child kept vanishing as I approached. I finally managed to cradle her, wipe away her tears and promised that the adult me would look after her in the right way from now on. My life changed very positively from that point: I started Uni at 40, finished well and am generally happier, healthier and wealthier.
@TheDruzza 10 ай бұрын
Good work terry!
@extremeresponsibility4325 10 ай бұрын
Janet Hogan, the 5th Door, has a practical program to do this
@The-Power-Of-Meow 9 ай бұрын
@@extremeresponsibility4325 You keep saying this. Are you Janet Hogan?
@kindauncool 8 ай бұрын
Who's it by?
@The-Power-Of-Meow 8 ай бұрын
@@kindauncool Janet Hogen.
@vinjane3526 8 ай бұрын
I’m an intervenes drug user and I’m 42, I e tried to get clean a lot of times been through the 12 steps 5 times been clean and sober for years at a time, but I can’t stay sober I have an inability to face reality and I’ve made up my own world and live in it, this has profoundly changed my point of view and I’m excited about tomorrow for the first time ever maybe, not a disease, I’m a child and my personal awareness is unbelievable, I can change with this knowledge! Thank you 🙏
@elizabethvorster677 6 ай бұрын
Good luck. I hope this has truly made a difference for you. You are not a product of your past but your future
@shirazvaldes4072 Ай бұрын
You can achieve it! You got this! Love yourself❤️
@vinjane3526 Ай бұрын
@@shirazvaldes4072 yes I can We all can!! Thank you for the message!!! ❤️
@composerpark2341 5 ай бұрын
The Diary of A CEO never lets me down. Always so inspiring and joyful. It feels like I am on an adventure of exploring myself with Steven and the guests. Sincerely, thank you for the great content.
@markbeks2019 4 ай бұрын
Agree ❤
@preciousmousse 4 ай бұрын
A denial of reality is a denial of how we feel about things. I've began healing a few years ago and used to listen to Gabor while I was in therapy. I am just starting to feel like I live in reality and it's such a relief and such a beautiful feeling of self assurance and independence. This mention almost got me in tears. My therapist used to talk about reality versus magic thinking a lot and even though I finished therapy this still keeps sinking in. To anyone looking for help, I hope you find the therapist that suits you, the work is invaluable. I personally recommend the Transactional Analysis field of Psychotherapy. Stay safe and strong 🙌
@kirstinstrand6292 3 ай бұрын
A TRAUMA therapist with 20+ years in practice is another good option for those disconnected from their childhood memories.
@marykinsella417 2 ай бұрын
@macsmiffy2197 4 ай бұрын
At the age of 67, I’ve finally started putting myself first . Needless to say, my family and friends are very confused. I don’t think they like me as much, but that’s ok.
@A_Hardy 18 күн бұрын
You got it all wrong!! A true father lives to serve and lift up his famely! Sounds like you became a ego narsisist
@ivyleigh1197 10 ай бұрын
I think this man is the person I have most ever related to. Thank you I no longer feel alone
@vandelay159 7 ай бұрын
Same here.
@margaretgreenwood4243 Жыл бұрын
I have waited 80 years to be able to understand. My eternal gratitude to you both
@Ellie-sx2rh Жыл бұрын
Many healing hugs to you my fellow warrior. You are an inspiration! Thank you for sharing. I wish you all the happiness you can stand! How are you feeling? How are you feeling 2 weeks later? Much love and light to all. One*
@0xmtk Жыл бұрын
Dear Margaret, I teared up reading your comment. Sometimes it takes a lifetime to understand. Hope you heal and enjoy the life.
@margaretgreenwood4243 Жыл бұрын
@@0xmtk 🕊
@NutbushAnnie Жыл бұрын
Bless you so much Margaret I am so happy that you are on your life changing journey. ❤
@margaretgreenwood4243 Жыл бұрын
@@NutbushAnnie Thank you for your kindness. Blessings to you 🕊🙏
@AprilHare 8 ай бұрын
This book sounds right up my alley. I've been "abnormal " my whole life and have been fighting to keep my head above water throughout it all. I'm glad I came upon your interview.
@mizt7643 6 ай бұрын
I have thought countless times, 'Something is very wrong with me but I don't know what it is.' Thanks to Mr. Maté I'm starting to realize the truth. I have gotten so low, and was in such despair that the thought of ending it was actually put in motion, my plans were thwarted that night by an unexpected phone call. I don't know why I am still alive and I STILL battle dark thoughts daily but Mr. Maté is helping me to understand the profound and excruciating pain I daily live with. I cannot thank him enough. Sincerely, sincerely! Thank you Mr. Maté!
@herstory1012 6 ай бұрын
Love this guy❤ Dr Mate...saving one person from their childhood at a time.
@DorothyEddington 7 ай бұрын
This was a terrific show. Gabor is honest and open about his own experiences and insightful regarding others> He is the kind of person that I could enjoy just being quiet with. He exudes peace and acceptance.
@onyssima 5 ай бұрын
You described him perfectly: honest and insightful towards other people. 👌
@Quest4truth23 9 ай бұрын
Every time I listen to Gabor talking about how you should treat a sensitive child so they can grow to be confidant and happy, I cant help but crying. in 2003 I was 7, in Iraq. Now, I am 27. Physically, i am not there, but mentally I feel like i never left. I cant help but feel for the little me who, since age of 7, lived in that horrible environment. I am not there now, i know that, but i still feel everything like it was yesterday. Sometimes it feels like a prison i cant escape. No matter how much I better my life now, i can never take away the pain, the stress and the lack of love little me had to live with.
@maxmusterman5134 9 ай бұрын
Hi, I found incredible relief from PTSD, which it seems like you are describing, through using EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) . It can trigger a feeling or sense of safety within you, instead of endlessly being triggered by memories and environment. Some of ithe therapies using it are overly complex so just try this one... Close your eyes when you are having flashback or physical upset. Hold your eyes as far left for 30 seconds as you can then move them as far right as you can for 30 seconds. Now open your eyes. Notice ANY shifts in thinking or feeling. You are stimulating a complex bundle of nerves in your body with the technique and TELLING them to quiet down, that you are safe! Stick with it until until you realize the gift that it is. You will eventually feel any tight areas in body instantly loosening and the former stress response will unwind itself over time. Now you can move forward with ever more confidence in your capacity to handle the upsets from the past. It's not the total answer to your problems, but it will clear a space so you can move forward. Good luck!
@kimpeccable 8 ай бұрын
Memento, as an American who watched with horror my country's "shock-and-awe" of Iraq, tears streaming down my face as I got ready for work, I can only begin to imagine the trauma you suffered. Maybe I was thinking of someone like you as I saw the bombs explode on TV, broadcasting this shameful violence for the world to see. I'm glad you survived, and I hope you know that there are many like myself that grieve for the people caught up in that terrible war. (All wars are terrible.) I hope you find a way to heal your trauma. I never went through a physical war, but I still suffer from childhood trauma. However, I'm no longer a victim. I think that's the first step in healing: to decide that you are no longer being done too, but that you are in full possession of your own life, doing what you need in order to become whole. I wish you the best of luck and send you love. 🌹
@mizt7643 6 ай бұрын
That feeling of never having been loved is gut-wrenching. Hugs to you @Product-Guru
@elizabethvorster677 6 ай бұрын
Hope you can feel my love to you
@elizabethvorster677 6 ай бұрын
@cherishchee Жыл бұрын
There is a reason why Dr Gabor Mate is revered by so many. His insights, humility and humanity is beyond. Love him so much.
@nextlevelintactivism8195 Жыл бұрын
Yet he still fails to elucidate the number one trauma done to babies! G3nital mut!lation. He's a coward just like everyone else.
@johnnydeppisarapistjohnnyd8962 11 ай бұрын
@ajsans9161 11 ай бұрын
Why tf does he have to inject Trump though and NOT any other politician! Does he have TDS. Like why doesn’t he speak on the narcissist pathological lying tyrant Joe Biden?!
@cj3720 11 ай бұрын
Gabor Mate validated my own experiences of 25+ years ago. So grateful I found a way to “walk through the rage” and learn the lessons rage came to teach me. It was a difficult path but one that put an end to my feelings of not being “good enough” and not being a worth while human being. Now I know I am and am helping others find their way out of that misery. The process also broke my addictions and stopped the cravings. I’m so grateful to be free!
@strayaoz 10 ай бұрын
@@cj3720 Good one X
@annaweiers2947 Ай бұрын
Of all the psychologists I’ve known of, Gabor is the most humble and honest. His book Scattered minds is also a must read, saved me from so much self-hate and confusion. Love this man and his son’s ❤!
@karenorchard3143 4 ай бұрын
never have I ever been more grateful for stumbling upon an unexpected find THANK YOU Gabor Mate. I look forward to reading your work. Thanks so much for having him on your channel
@lynnritchie231 9 ай бұрын
I didn't have a father for the first three years of my life and I used to ask my Mum 'why?' I wonder if this affected me more than I thought.
@vaxinjuredbypfizer 6 ай бұрын
Just listening to Dr. Gabor Matè's calming voice alone calms me, nevermind the hope to heal he gives me! Such a blessing! Excellent interview! Tyvm!❤
@tamesullivan6340 Ай бұрын
I was very privileged to meet Gabor at a conference in Ottawa. What a wonderfully smart and helpful man ❤
@revatiupadhya2951 Жыл бұрын
The calm, gentle manner in which Gabor delivers his learnings is EVERYTHING.
@BX5M Жыл бұрын
I think you're right. At first I wasn't really into it, because it reminded me of the typically teacher of back in the days. But further I listened, the more I really enjoyed the way he delivered his argumentes in this calm manner. Was a really good episode. As usual.
@natashamudford4011 Жыл бұрын
I'm new here. Both of these men have a delightful calm manner. I can't believe the host is single. I hope he finds the right woman soon.
@natashamudford4011 Жыл бұрын
@@michaelmessenger2024 Hello. That's why I said "the right woman," not just "a woman." I know not all men need a woman, nor do all women need a man. And that's before you get to all the LGBTQ+ insanity. However, this guy seems to want to find a mate, by his own words, a woman in fact (thank God he's straight)... so I wish him well in his search.
@natashamudford4011 Жыл бұрын
@@michaelmessenger2024 Relationships are difficult, and despite our progressive technology and such, relationships still don't seem to be getting any easier. To make matters worse, it seems the government is doing everything it can to destroy the traditional family. I envy the old couple that has been married for decades, who have kids and grandkids, and all of them on a productive route thru life. Or at least most of them. I am blessed to be living in Texas. Where do you hang your hat?
@natashamudford4011 Жыл бұрын
@@michaelmessenger2024 I didn't see anything with a Gmail address.
@joevalentin2450 9 ай бұрын
Listening to Dr. Gabor Mate makes you witness the best in humanity in the person of a doctor.
@russmeili5486 6 ай бұрын
I'm surprised the topic of media and news outlets targeting stress responses never came up, but Dr. Gabor is a gift! Thank you for sharing him with us Steven and the DOAC team!
@annmarieknapp2480 8 ай бұрын
Really love Dr. Mate's work. I can almost feel the weight he's carries on his shoulders. Such a kind and compassionate man. I can't thank him enough. And I love that he discusses workaholics in same category of the other addictions. People always assume addiction must be just of drugs, alcohol, and food. Absolutely incomplete. My parents were workaholics. Dad used to say follow the Protestant work ethic, which was comical to me before he was a Catholic. But, he was also a small business owner so he was always working. Even now he works part time and he's 80. He says it keeps him sharp, but at least he is making time to enjoy life in other domains. In any event, I want to share this message with my friends,loved ones, my colleagues, and students. Its a relief to hear it said. Our society glorifies working to the point of illness and exhaustion as a good thing. Europe and other countries are much better about work/life balance. I do like to work hard, but now because I enjoy the challenge, not to receive acceptance or acknowledgement. Frankly, most Americans don't get an acknowledgement anyway. So if you work hard or extensively at least do it because it brings you satisfaction in and of itself. Not for others to validate you. They often don't and it leaves you feeling overlooked, taken advantage of, and so forth. And find a way to carve out time to just be. You won't say on your deathbed, I should have worked harder and more. You're going to wish you spent more time with family and loved ones. You'll also regret things you wanted to do and couldn't. Don't put off things you want to do. It may not be easy, maybe you'll need a side hustle to earn some extra cash to make that dream trip or experience possible, but it will be worth it. I want to go to England and Scotland. Have my whole life. I'm actively saving a pirtion of each check towards that goal. Sendings hugs to anyone here. Know you are loved and more than enough no matter what your background is. Peace, love, and light to you all. Namaste.
@lynnepelland7971 5 ай бұрын
This has to be one of the most powerful and moving podcasts I’ve heard so far and I’ve heard so many. Thank you so much for your guest speaker and author and doctor, his compassion for mankind, accepting that what has been done was horrible but also accepting that those who are traumatized and hurt are victims of terrible childhood situations and cannot be judged and blamed for their actions in adulthood. Very eye opening podcast.
@AnaRodrigues-fv1sc 4 ай бұрын
Thank you Dr. Gabor Mate! In the midst of darkness, your light shines bright, making a profound difference in the world
@Philly_bul 10 ай бұрын
This man saved my life more times than i can count. The world needs to listen to him.
@wendyway6513 10 ай бұрын
Totally agree!!
@sarahandthebookbath 9 ай бұрын
@PBenedicte 9 ай бұрын
I totally agree
@pagedemuth1482 8 ай бұрын
He's ON the money! My current teacher studied with him for 3 days. You ✨️ are correct. The WORLD needs to 'hear' him
@LizetteBradfield 5 ай бұрын
I need a life saver. Or don't I? Maybe not this time, let life suck out the last of what is "me".. Will listen to this man. Never heard of him. Thanks to this channel.
@mariav5930 3 ай бұрын
Dr. Maté is so honest and authentic! He is so amazing ❤️
@oliviadebruyn774 8 ай бұрын
So profound, thank you. As a DV survivor, abuse survivor this speaks to the core of what I see and the work I do to heal.
@giginy8697 9 ай бұрын
Was looking up more interviews with Gabor, and of course he’s always amazing and inspiring but I must say that I really liked your interview style, including the humbleness and authenticity you said you’re working in… but I say you’re already showing it. I guess that’s why authenticity is good… it makes other relate to us as we all have issues. Facade of perfection is NOT relatable to most of us.
@epluribusunum1460 4 ай бұрын
Dr. Mate’s description around the 8:55 point in the video is exactly what has happened to me, when you get that insight of the early wound’s effect on you, you can see it’s applications in yourself throughout your life. And as always he clarifies and helps to resolve confusion. 🙏🙏🙏
@starlight-hy7is 6 ай бұрын
This fantastic man is a gift to humanity. I iove his softly spoken voice i could listened to him all day. He delivers all of him knowledge in such a wonderful manner. Easy to understand and impactful. His work has helped me immensely. Thank you for having Gabor as a guest. I love this podcast.
@julie5668 Жыл бұрын
My mother told me, all the time, how depressed she was when she knew she was having me. How she had morning sickness throughout her pregnancy with me, How I was born at 5.45 am, "Just in time for breakfast. Typical Julie!" My baby book describes me in very unfavourable ways because I was jaundiced, and on and on..., no wonder of all my sisters, I was the only one who didn't cry at her funeral. You can't lose what you never really had.
@infiniteshoeblack Жыл бұрын
Julie, isn't it comforting that we gain the knowledge as we grow, that we are not at all dissimilar, as human beings, sharing this existence.
@mitzipaigemclemore9282 Жыл бұрын
I said the same thing about my family. I’m sad you felt as I had growing up. Hopefully your surrounded by more love now. 😊
@peter-peter5929 Жыл бұрын
I'm sorry for your early life experience. Are you speaking to anyone about it? Even after the source is gone, we need to process EV•ERY•THING. That usually requires dumping on a professional on a regular basis. GOD loves you no matter what and you'll never understand how much.
@kyszre6787 Жыл бұрын
Wishing you luck and love creating your new future.
@kymhocaluk9408 Жыл бұрын
Your mother’s behavior doesn’t define you. You are worthy of luv and great experiences in this life and the next. ❤
@swatirenapurkar2675 3 ай бұрын
i dont know how many times I can hear him.....he makes so much sense, every time i listen to him.....its like self healing
@ForestSageStyles 2 ай бұрын
I find now at 62 I like being alone with myself. I enjoy my own company. It has been years of developing and evolving through past trauma to get here. I am grateful to be here but i am still digging and working on addictions. Your conversation helps broaden my perspective. Thank you
@_s_4412 5 ай бұрын
Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome.
@senios7 9 ай бұрын
Gabe talks with such focus to what he says, he is more focused to it than when you give exams to enter university. What an interview listening to it again, think he is changing me like reading a book
@DamBevers 8 ай бұрын
Good on ya, Mike Sheridan! My heart skipped a beat when I read "57". It's strange how for so many, for so long, one's self is the most difficult person for one to have an open conversation with. I, for one, am so good at helping other people solve their problems, but cannot seem to do the same for myself. Our minds are beautiful miracles, far rarer throughout the unimultiverse than most appreciate. But the mind is also an entrapment of sorts. Some look at the world and themselves from the inside out. Some look at themselves from the outside in. Some manage to balance the two. The longer I live, the more I realize that most people are not 'normal'. They are debilitated by anguish or mental illness. The 'normal' people that manage to seemingly not be affected and lead a healthy, balanced life, are the minority among us. And maybe they too struggle every day but manage to keep it out of sight. I have had many unchosen brushes with death. If I were a cat with 9 lives, I'd be dead long ago. It's true what people say, that every day is a gift. Every second may be our last. Life is far more fragile than most people realize. Our brain turns almost everything we see and experience into symbols, most of them kept, interpreted, and associated in the subconscious. It is important to feed our mind a healthy diet. Join me in taking a moment each day to be quiet, walk among nature or close our eyes and go somewhere safe and beautiful. Allow yourself to fully enjoy at least one simple thing. The smell of a flower. The wind on your face. The taste of the ocean in the air. Daylight breaking. The song of the birds. The feeling of walking barefoot in the sand. Even just for a short moment. Unknowingly, it will free you from yourself. Repeat. Don't over think it. You are worthy of joy and you deserve to be happy.
@Bojan_V 7 ай бұрын
@aileenmac1 5 ай бұрын
@Boo-jy5ju Жыл бұрын
Repressed anger and embarrassment, shame , works itself out as Depression, and a life full of drugs to survive!! Face your past. You already lived through it.
@chaserofthelight1737 Жыл бұрын
@bobcat2938 Жыл бұрын
@robertmatheson9542 Жыл бұрын
I like your comment and for me maybe how to proceed in this area. now to figure out how to proceed.
@goych Жыл бұрын
@chaserofthelight1737 Жыл бұрын
@@robertmatheson9542 you got this. ❤️‍🔥(as they say) look what you’ve already overcome.
@user-xe8zk7en7o 7 ай бұрын
This has changed my perspective towards recovery before I was striving to get back to being normal but now my goal is to find myself and the things that make me happy
@MetaFootballTV 4 ай бұрын
I think I have read maybe less than 10 books in my whole life, and The Myth of Normal was one of them. GM...what a treasure of a man.
@RishabhSharma10225 7 ай бұрын
Hearing this man speak and relating it to my life gave me literal goosebumps. Couldn't be more thankful!
@woventhornsmusic 4 ай бұрын
wow - i was moved to tears listening to some of this (especially the 5 "R"s). I've been doing my own mental / emotional / personal work throughout this past year and this podcast came at the exact perfect time in my journey.
@maradagiostomezzoli9129 10 ай бұрын
Este podcast trouxe me tanto esclarecimentos sobre minha infância e minha vida. Obrigada Gabor por compartilhar tanto conhecimento, humildade e compaixão pelo próximo
@snezaostojic Жыл бұрын
My father has passed away when my daughter was only 9 months old. I was very very attached to him. She saw my blues. Sometimes she could feel it even when i smile. This is who we are. Like the rock is shaped by the sea and the wind, human is shaped by the pain and fear, retouched by faith and people like Gabor. But it's natural. We are so fragile yet beautiful
@jr6200 Жыл бұрын
Very beautifully expressed, and very true
@4Grace4Truth Жыл бұрын
Well said
@EricLopushansky Жыл бұрын
The good news is we are also anti fragile. Pain and fear are pathways to growth.
@happylindsay4475 Жыл бұрын
My Mother visibly retracted into herself after her Father passing. I grew up with the script that Death meant irreparable loss and separation and a loss of love and connection. I grew up navigating around my Mom’s grief and abuse she suffered- I still think it’s me.
@terencereed7957 Жыл бұрын
Beautifully written
@saffyre6534 8 ай бұрын
On one hand I'm like "why didn't I watch this sooner?" and on the other, I know I've watched at the perfect time for what I'm going through right now. To say this interview and the work Gabor does is a Game Changer feels like an understatement 🤯
@estelibowman-rivera1957 15 күн бұрын
This blew my mind ❤️ and this is actually the first interview with Dr. Mate I have ever heard. What a treasure trove! He lays things out in a simple, honest, authentic way that immediately brought me new understanding. I feel refreshed and grounded. And Stephen, I really appreciate your insightfulness, and the way that you seem to really dive into your guest's work beforehand, which I think makes your interviews that much more powerful- thank you for the time and commitment you put into this, I am receiving so many benefits!
@MotivationSportPodcast 2 ай бұрын
*This video is a reminder that success is a journey, not a destination. The stories shared here are a testament to hard work, dedication, and the belief that anything is possible. Inspired to chase my dreams*
@thehylers1021 5 ай бұрын
Thank you for this amazing podcast. I've listened to at least a dozen interviews with Gabor Mate and I have been forever changed. I've been able to re-parent myself, regain and be in touch with my God-given gut instincts, and express my feelings and emotions with a new sense of freedom. Plus I have forgiven my parents and see them with love and compassion. Grateful and blessed! Thanks again.🙏🏽❤
@user-lt6vj4gq4l 3 ай бұрын
Dr Cabor Mate is providing such positive & immense benefits to those fortunate enough to hear his knowledgeable wisdom & advice. A wonderful man !
@sheilakirby5616 Жыл бұрын
@Kari.F. Жыл бұрын
@@noname-hb8vk A good foundation is nothing to sneeze at. It's easier to build a good life on a safe and solid foundation that provided us with genuine confidence, strength and maturity to handle the bad things that happen in life in a good way. You should have listened to the interview while you were here.
@mirafilipovic5162 Жыл бұрын
So very true! But would have to be great and loving from inside out!
@gabrielgarcia-fraire9504 Жыл бұрын
No the greatest we can have in life is a dog.
@jennklein1917 Жыл бұрын
I did, and it helps you be resilient 😁🥰
@Jennifer-gr7hn Жыл бұрын
@@jennklein1917 Actually, a cross filled, traumatic childhood is what helped me be resilient. Those I know who had a seemingly perfect "good" childhood? They are the impatient, entitled non-resilient adults.....hmmm
@CMoore8539 8 ай бұрын
Gabor Mate’ is a Genius!♥️ I never realized how stoic he is about life. I’ve noticed that the older I get the more stoic I become too. Perhaps many of us become disillusioned about life in older age.
@sun4u423 8 ай бұрын
Excellent guest, so willing to share his experiences and a total acceptance of himself and the way you are do the work but accept who you are. Great, great interview. 👍🏻👏🏻☀️😎💃💃💃
@user-ws1ze1jp9x 2 ай бұрын
I love the pause, the space you leave your guests to answer within. It's not too long, it's not awkward. It's just space. This was my favorite episode to date 🩷
@jsuchaldy9690 Ай бұрын
Thank you for your insight,many of us are recovering from our childhoods. I'm 60 and still unlearning what was thrust upon me.
@creativelearning8318 7 ай бұрын
As an educator, this is one of the most powerful talk sessions that I have ever heard on the impact of trauma on the human brain development. The power of nurturing and empathy in interactions with children is so important to their learning. I look forward to reading The Myth of Normal.
@enlightenedheart740 Жыл бұрын
Gabor is a LEGEND. Well done for having him on as a guest 🙏
@TheDiaryOfACEO Жыл бұрын
AN honour!
@nb6175 Жыл бұрын
How come his son turned out to be such an evil little psychopath?
@jacelee8613 Жыл бұрын
Damn straight.
@gregorbingham Жыл бұрын
@@TheDiaryOfACEO What's incredibly powerful is any entrepreneur that faces their demons, and spreads the word to everyone in your audience. It's just lovely to see. This helps me in my work coaching clients at my tech company. They love evidence, and heart. Thank you.
@garyfrancis6193 Жыл бұрын
Yes he and Zsa Zsa.
@nsade5715 13 күн бұрын
Gabor has a mysterious energy like a strong hora that just enter directly to your heart. Thanks for being this much pure and transparent and thanks again for your existence during our time on planet earth. You hard work, honesty, and your being is really appreciated. We need you to share more about your knowledge and experiences. Thanks a lot!
@joannthomases9304 9 ай бұрын
This guy is beyond amaaaazing to hear ! Never heard such an honest man ! Wow ! 💖 Glad mom got him safe to be here !!!!!! I am so grateful God talked to her best judgment to love him soooo much to give us this gift, he gave us all !!!!!! She made a tremendous giving 😭💕 So sadened how difficult her heart was breaking in her tremendous trust in hearing such a painful trial to sacrifice ...i feel like we have been given her very best and she knew to hear God first. Sooooo amazed in your spirit giving such love coming through you both and i'd love to be this much light to others ! This guy has given me sooo much back to my spirit ! My heart is grown larger. Thank you more than you could ever realize ! Cannot wait to hear more from you !!!!!!
@nqobilemagubane6778 9 ай бұрын
I feel that with all the times that my parents mistreated me then soon realized it, I would have turned out so much better if they verbalized that they were wrong and apologized. Instead I got got candy or a toy, which in my adult life has become flowers and chocolate.
@dfwguy7149 8 ай бұрын
the BEST gift a parent can give to a child is 'apology', showing humility....saying 'I was wrong and I am sorry for ....blaming you...hitting you...ignoring you..". Unfortunately this is why ppl can never trust God. You have to be humble to come before God and say...I am sorry. If you've never seen that modeled or heard it, you spend your life arrogant and trying to earn your way in life being 'right' all the time. Never admitting you are wrong. It's what creates narcissism! Games and control and BS and much pain and loneliness and lack of deep relationships.
@shotgun_blammo 6 ай бұрын
I didn’t get anything. I don’t remember my dad apologising to me once. He recently passed away. I’m going to break that cycle with my little boy, I owe it to him. He’s 18 months and I’m looking forward to building an even stronger bond with him.
@indrepraneviciute3107 4 ай бұрын
Steven is such a gift to humanity. I learn so much about myself and the world. Its helping me to heal from PTSD. I understand a lot of what I was feeling had nothing to do with other people and more to do with me. It’s like therapy ❤
@ankits2513 5 ай бұрын
I'm sitting here realizing that I might have this without being diagnosed for the 28 years of my life. The un-ease and the sudden crying is down to something even though my life is normal in all other ways
@alanfrancis9225 Жыл бұрын
I was born into a psychiatric ward called family. All families are dysfunction on a sliding scale. Abuse is not just sexual ( our sexuality is core to our self worth- it’s who we are) it’s mental, physical, emotional and spiritual. You don’t know what you don’t know. So you adapt to survive. It’s not just the parents who are dysfunctional it’s all the siblings. My sister ( three years older than me ) was the family’s scapegoat. Guess who was her scapegoat. Then we take our trauma trances ( bonds) into the world. Non the wiser. Every moment of our life from jobs, roles, relationships, hobbies, activities will be driven as attempts to repair our wounds ( attempts at symbolic healing. They rarely if ever work, just exhaust us in the process. Addictions, codependency , anxiety and health problems. If we are lucky we wake up once, twice, three times from these abuse trances and go on a healing journey. At 67 I am free of all abuse bonds for the first time in my life. Free to heal and be myself.
@rebeccahorton4570 11 ай бұрын
I'm 62 and so irritated at this age I still feel cray cray...
@adrianazollo2688 10 ай бұрын
Families are mini cults I am too individualistic to identify with my family
@Man_of_Tears 9 ай бұрын
I am fascinated by how this is written down. I had a dream about the psych ward too. Somehow the Spiritual seems on a different plane than my traumatically affected self, in my interpretation. That keeps me from seeing things as a dying light.
@TinaNFields 8 ай бұрын
I truly rejoice at having found you. Thank you for the clarity you and Gabor gave to the matter. I have now understood some things that I never did before. Thank you!
@Moneybussinez Ай бұрын
I find it striking how the best advice is given by people who had a tough childhood themselves. As if it is necessary to understand and feel and gain insights that allow you to help others.
@user-jn9yy1my4n 6 ай бұрын
This is one of my favourite interviews to date, I love Gabor Mate’s work, it’s felt life saving at times and I apply his Philosophy in my work. The the curiosity, intelligence, passion and responsiveness of Stephen, I am such a fan and inspired… keep up your brilliant work Huge love and gratitude 🙏
@faithhall8175 4 ай бұрын
I’m so happy to discover Dr Mate. He has given me a much clearer understanding of myself and I now feel brave enough to write my first book ( withheld due to internal Tito& fear ). This interview has had a positive impact on my self image and has given me hope. Yes, I plan to buy several books by Dr.Gabor Mate. He is a awesome person!. Thank you for a wealth of good info. I Enjoyed immensely. ❤
@GodsChild321 10 ай бұрын
Thank You! So much healing that happened to me during this interview, these kind of videos should be watched more by more it’s a blessing, each one teach one, this world make more sense know.. May God Bless everyone watching..
@emperorofpluto 11 ай бұрын
*We live in a sick society.* Dr Maté has remarkable insight into why our society is so toxic and dysfunctional. Materialism, greed and narcissism are killing us.
And let's not forget the fascist mass brainwashing of western societies with materialism, greed and narcissism.
@anitachojnacki4512 7 ай бұрын
Well said...this man is simply sensational and not it love him,life changing Thsnkyou wish you were my pyhschrist.....or my husband lol
@harrietjohnson1930 7 ай бұрын
Yes, we are self destructing. We can open our eyes, get understanding and start to make better choices in all areas of our lives. 💞
@valerieirvin249 6 ай бұрын
Yes n we all know who those people are, for the most part.....
@barbaraives5751 5 ай бұрын
There are some of us left who do NOT ride with GREED and Materialism and boy are we CRUCIFIED.
@binagupta3308 4 ай бұрын
I love the way he interviews with so much maturity and sensitivity.
@TheDiaryOfACEO 3 ай бұрын
Thanks, really glad you enjoyed the episode! Team DOAC
@chistensonc 5 ай бұрын
1:40:00 "Sometimes, it's the cost of being me, so what" Those words hit my soul. THAT is Acceptance. I put down the book 'Scattered' because I could not get that concept--going back to finish reading it. Thank you, Dr Gabor Mate! God Bless you
@FairyQueen669 6 ай бұрын
His voice and existence soothes my Soma and Psyche 🙌🏾 Bless him and his family.
@jadeshenellexox 2 ай бұрын
My father was emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually abusive… my sisters and I always say he taught us how to punish ourselves. We picked up the torch, his voice in my head morphed into my own.
@EmilyW.isawakenotwoke 25 күн бұрын
What a wonderful chat. I'm personally grateful to Gabor for helping my brother, who is an alcoholic with trauma that I never knew he had because he hid it so well. He listens to Gabor and it's really helping him to deal with his trauma rather than suppressing it. ❤️🙏🕊️
@patriciashelton6644 Жыл бұрын
I was a stay at home mom, I was there every minute for my children. Then I had to push them into the hands of society, school. Where they learned bullying, hate, how the teachers acted different towards the kids whom parents owned a business, or were significant in the community. All the self esteem I built up in them, the system tore it down. No matter how I tried, all I heard from my children is, you don't understand, you tell us we're pretty, smart, an everything because you love us, they don't love us, so they must be telling us the truth. Society is sick, full of hate and greed. You can't save your children from it, only keep telling them and showing them you love them. But there comes a time, when your love isn't enough, they want friends and fit in. It's hard being a parent.
@karaa7595 Жыл бұрын
This is exactly why I chose to homeschool. 💔
@laurakosch Жыл бұрын
@@karaa7595 As did we. But even that wall of love and protection was not enough. Our children still are broken by this world. When they were young I would have said this could never happen, it only happens (unfortunately) to other families
@georgeindestructible Жыл бұрын
Overcompensation does not help, which is what a good amount of mothers and fathers try to use on their children, it only helps create traps in the personality which then, when faced with disagreeing reality, will unavoidably create psychological holes in certain aspects of the character which, most of the time will set up a loop of behaviors until they either brake you or make you realize after some point and/or experience that you have to find out why this happens to you and then what to change. The secret is always balance and when to temporarily be unbalanced if you have to.
@Secretzstolen Жыл бұрын
ouch this hurts my heart. I think having honest conversations with them about how that makes them feel and how they handle it is important too. Self esteem isn't just about saying nice things to yourself - it's about how you deal with the lows too. It's about how you stay true to yourself. Discovering who you are. Keeping promises to yourself. Figuring out what your values are regardless of society. Finding your tribe. Being able to handle betrayal, hurt. Being honest with yourself about negative feelings and experiences, allowing yourself to feel them without trying to change them, hide them, or invalidate them. It's also about recognizing your strengths. It's one thing to tell someone they're pretty, it's another thing to point out exactly what makes them beautiful in detail. Using genuine expressions instead of platitudes makes a huge difference - it's about being mindful and present as well.
@queent3343 Жыл бұрын
My kids went to school and were still confident and happy. They were taught how to handle themselves and self-love. Those lessons meant bullies didn't matter. They have been given unconditional love and allowed to be themselves and not who society thinks they should be. Once again, this attitude negates bullies. Stop blaming schools for all that's bad. It's your job to help them navigate in the real world.
@fatoomgierdien110 8 ай бұрын
This dialogue is so huge in the life of every human on this planet( defending on their sense of self-awareness). Much love and Compassion to Alllll of us. Thank you so much. ❤️ Cape Town.
@jameslabelle6416 4 ай бұрын
Dr. Gabor Mate, you are saving me from my pain and trauma which has resurfaced and wants to to destroy me. Thank you
@agustinamorano8389 8 ай бұрын
I already did, but I respect you so much Steven for this interview. Not only because I LOVE AND ADMIRE Gabor so much, but because I could see you reflecting on yourself and trying to learn more about yourself during this interview. It’s so brave and it was beautiful to watch together with this masterclass that Gabor gave us. Thank you both so much ❤
@ezlow1065 4 ай бұрын
Yes I agree. Its a very rare thing to be so openly transparent. Its beautiful!
@amandabrowne9675 Ай бұрын
I am so impressed by your authenticity and persistent curiosity, Steven. It is truly a breath of fresh air. Your questions for Dr.Gabor Mate were very bold! I have yet to see a better interview with him. Really well done, and thankyou for your amazing content.
@guybough 2 ай бұрын
I just wanted to say how much I appreciated your interview on this topic. It is a hard but necessary reality for more people to understand that this is a kind of pain that is so often needlessly suffered in silence and isolation by many.
@PhetteHollins Жыл бұрын
I came across one of Gabor Mate’s quotes years ago before even knowing who he was. It is because of his quote (I’m paraphrasing), “Don’t ask why the addiction, ask why the pain” that I’m such a huge fan. His work around trauma truly resonates with my soul. Thanks for this interview. 💜
@lorenrobertson8039 Жыл бұрын
How poignant. It is self medicating for most that fall down that rabbit hole of addiction. Speaking as one that did find myself surprisingly without hope or my life d/t just one time an acquaintance pressuring me to try crack cocaine at a party. I lost everything at that moment. I'd never found that absence of the lifelong psychological pain I never learned to cope with. Very hard to climb out of that hole and rebuild a life worth living. I'm old and disabled now. I'm so glad those days are over. I love your comment so much. Thank you
@tiffanybluetarot Жыл бұрын
Yes, same here. That addiction talk he gave was so amazing.
@anthonyiacobucci3652 Жыл бұрын
True, its where AA and 12 step programs are missing the boat. They change the behavior but the pain is still underneath.
@lorenrobertson8039 Жыл бұрын
@@anthonyiacobucci3652 That's not what I seemed to cause me to feel the pain over and over, and it triggered me so much to sit in those rooms and listen to everyone's war stories. I found a great small group that I was with for years. Much better, but I finally quit going. We were more of a family and we stepped out of the boundaries of AA and the program and talked about what we needed to to stay sober.
@affenwerk5598 Жыл бұрын
That's so important. I came across a short video years ago, summed up, about that addiction in its core is about the feeling that it helps to achieve, not about a real craving for a substance (of course the body comes dependent on those as well in the process) But it's like with emotions, none of them are "bad" , everyone of them wants to tell us sth about us in the world. And I find myself learning they're pretty good teachers to know where to change things in my life for the better. 😊
@carolynbilleci4716 3 ай бұрын
It meant for me to find this TODAY. The Mind/Body correlation I learned like most: a bit here, there, books, colleagues, meetings. I knew there was more to white knuckling our impulses. Thank you!! I'm 72.11 just retired from just about everything. Work, activism, rescuing, coaching, yada, yada. Now I can resign to my genuine self and response. Timing is everything. Now...the chapter has "me" in it. No ko' fixing others except by example. Namaste'
@trinindibariloche677 5 ай бұрын
thank you so much. Iv found talking to your parents directly about traumas is really great, its like a burden can be lifted.
@lauriesantos 10 ай бұрын
"These are actual 'normal' responses to an abnormal set of circumstances."-Dr. Gabor Maté Best quote ever.
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