Grief & Loss // Season 3 Episode 11 | Honest Tea Talk

The response to loss is a very personal experience, even when it’s a shared loss. In this episode, we discuss grief and loss as a learning journey that everyone needs to navigate.
How did you navigate previous loss experiences? What did you learn? Tell us in the comments below.
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About Honest Tea Talk
with Aliyah, LaYinka & Sumayah
Inspired by Jada Pinkett-Smith's 'Red Table Talk', 3 Muslim women have set up a platform to speak openly and honestly, giving viewers an unedited insight into the minds and life of Muslim women. Honest Tea Talk brings deep and often unspoken topics to the table to lay down our masks and start much-needed discussions about matters related to Muslim women and the ummah at large.
© 2021
#honestteatalk #realtalk #grief

[@yaseensinsights]

To our brothers & sisters is Palestine, We see your losses & acknowledge your grief. May Allah make your affairs easy & replace your grief with immense joy. Aameen 🤲🏾

[@agbajelatifat9862]

Ameen 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@naimanali1970]

Ameen ya Allah

[@HK00088]

Watch brother Ali Dawahs reaction to this video

[@rona6]

I needed this! much love from Palestine ..

[@ayaatyoussef1443]

may allah help and protect your country my country

[@rona6]

@@ayaatyoussef1443 Ameen

[@s.a.4683]

اللهم انصر اهل فلسطين!!! 💗

[@munaaliii]

إن الله معكم ❤️❤️❤️🇵🇸 #palestinewillrise

[@Nana-bc7qd]

We are with you. May Allah ease your pain and suffering and may He replace you with something far better. Palestine will be free 🇵🇸🇵🇸❤️

[@garaadsan.6191]

Patience is bitter! Imagine, you're in a state of helpnessness, you can do nothing about your situation and you don't know when your situation is going to change.You make dua and pray to Allah and then it takes time, and you will have to wait and be patient.In that state of helplessness and in that waiting, is such a state of bitterness and i now know why the rewards of patience is without estimation.

[@mohammedali.london]

Grief should remind us all of why we're here, too many people forget, we're not here to be "happy".

[@PremiumVibesMedia]

there's a major problem with that statement.

[@Aliyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

I actually loved the silence as much as I love you guys speaking. Rawest episode ever. Felt like it was a bunch of us friends sisters listening to eachother even though us viewers were not there physically in the room.

[@mariamajallow1830]

i needed this topic so badly im going through grief and loss . i lost dearest my mother last month been going through a lot please include her in your duas.

[@foreverme171]

I will be making dua for your mother sister Mariama May Allah bless your mother, Ameen

[@ummhaniefa2394]

May Allaah the most Merciful reunite u in jenna❤️

[@yaseensinsights]

Takeaway: Allow yourself to Feel your loss! Grief has to be processed!!!

[@agbajelatifat9862]

“I do not have a Lord that test and leaves me to it” this episode speaks to me on so many levels and hurdles of my personal life and I let it out and I feel better Alhamdulilah ...

[@ifix666]

This topic was well needed, I love the point that Sumaya made about how death is a type of grief that is socially accepted but others types of grief is not like going through a divorce, being betrayed by a love one etc.. Its so true. I also noticed a lot of people making duah for Aliyah but not Sumaya, you can clearly see they are both crying so both have been affected by this topic. Black women are expected to have it all together and carry the burden without so much as a complain. Racism is real in the ummah so disappointing to see it in the comment sessions. May Allah heal your heart sister Aliyah and Sumaya and all the Muslim ummah who may being going through a calamity.

[@corazoncubano5372]

From watching previous episodes, I was under the impression that all 3 sisters here were Black or or of African ancestry.

[@nusaybahox]

@@corazoncubano5372 Yes, true.

[@fadheelah7760]

Crying while watching this episode with our wonderful sisters🥰 I lost my mother 1 month ago and i feel so happy to watched this video

[@charla712]

This is the discussion I didn't know that I needed. Specially the highlight of the inner conflict we might have between wanting to act upon loss as a good muslim but also having human emotions we are having a hard time dealing with. And I thank you for that sisters. May Allah bless you

[@diebiraf]

Today is the day I needed to hear this. Allah knows what HE is doing. May HE bless us all, guide us and forgive us all. Ameeennnn

[@saburayusuf5635]

AMEEN 🤲🏾

[@kikioo7249]

I have lost my fiance in January, it is so hurting and a long process, may Allah give us the power to overcome the losses of our beloved ones with his pleasure, so that we can reunite in Jannah

[@hanoush101]

Amiiin ya rabbi😢❤

[@shaamadam7893]

This reminds me the loss of my mother when I was only 10 years old. Growing up without the love and help of my mother was really hard and lonely, taught me resilience and adaptability in Dunya.

[@asmaamahmood247]

Masha Allah, the most honest, real and raw episode. I felt like I was watching a private conversation. May Allah ease your suffering and soothe your pain. Sending my love 💜

[@PremiumVibesMedia]

I feel so safe watching these videos its unreal

[@ummnora4665]

Subhana llaah, here Iam sitting greving after los of my dear bro mohamoud omer sh ibrahim 8 Feb 2021, and this come upp subhana llaah 😭😭😭😭❤❤❤

[@Aliyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

😢

[@Nuggyx3_]

This episode was so necessary. I felt like I was sitting there with you all. I was crying at certain parts of the conversation, thinking about the struggles I am dealing with in my relationship. Having to face the fact that I might lose this person that I love so dearly... You sisters are so incredibly strong for even doing this episode and pushing through the emotional pain to talk to us about it. I really value the emphasis on just being and feeling. Going through the heavy emotions without judging yourself is so important in healing. It's so comforting to know that our Lord is with us and he will never place a burden upon us that which we cannot bear... May Allah swt bless you all and bring you sisters all the healing, love, comfort, and ease you need 💖 Ameen

[@bangtan_ls_43]

I got divorced right before ramadan, 6 days ago. Im still in shock, we were engaged for almost two years and the wedding was supposes to be after this ramadan. My heart is shattered and i cant even quite focus on ramadan. This video helped me understand that theres nothing thats gonna essentially make me feel better, i just need time to process it. Thank you so much for touching on a topic like this, especially in a state of grief herself

[@aali4750]

I just found this episode by chance and Allah knows that I needed it after losing my father. May Allah give you all ease and remove the pain of loss from your hearts. May Allah reunite us all with our loved ones in Janatal Firdows.

[@hanan3333]

May Allah reward you sisters! I wish i could hear this when i was 16 and lost my father. I didnt work through the emotions and pain, and the loss overtakes me all the time... Allah yer7am jami3 al muslimin

[@Princess_Zo]

May Allah ease the pain of your loss and allow barakah to sprout from unexpected sources. Hang in there and do what you need to heal 🌹💕 Allah's got you

[@fatimamahjoub2680]

"It means a lot to them, because of what it signified" Exactly! 😭♥️

[@Moon_2024]

YA rab, we need your help there is no help except your help. 🤲

[@nadirakabore6984]

@ Hanan Amin🤲🏾🤲🏾

[@advocate5814]

I am still feeling emotional about the lost of my brother.

[@Princess_Zo]

Rewatching this after a major loss. It hits differently, and IDK how Aaliya sat through this so soon after receiving the news of her loss. May Allah bless you for this.

[@sultana_467]

Sisters I so needed to hear this. May Allah reward all abundantly, Aameen

[@Hhh986]

AMEEN

[@aminanoor6337]

May Allah reward these beautiful sisters, they hold themselves so well so that we can benefit. I really do look forward to hearing their perspectives on such important matters in such a realistic and well articulated manner.

[@saniaf258]

Sending lots of strength and duas Aliyah’s way.

[@sadiyyaarab4549]

❤️

[@108bloom]

What a vulnerable beauty this episode was. It’s so important to be having these discussions with compassion and the space to be. To just be. You three are a mercy for us, thank you❤️

[@andreaboyd33]

SubhanaAllah ta ala knows I feel your grief and pain of lost.. Loosing my two biological brothers and not having my own father or mother to grieve with was and still tremendously hard for me. Just last month loosing my youngest (27 yrs old) daughter from asthma was also very hard to get through ( a lost of apretite, and just down right sadden of her sudden death). . I gave it to Allah and it really calm my nerves.. My Warmest Condolences to your loss and your grief. May Allah swt bring ease. Amin

[@ayaatyoussef1443]

Aliyah have been tested before the pandemic i really feel your pain my sister allah test you becous he knows Aliyah is strong

[@fatimamahjoub2680]

"if you feel, the grief is there"😭😭♥️♥️THANK YOU SOMAYA

[@Khadija-xt5kf]

I have been bawling through this episode 😭 but at the end I feel stronger. Thank you HTT. We all feel grief in different ways and need to allow ourselves to be and feel. May Allah bless you sisters and help you through your loss ❤

[@raheemahodusote4778]

I went through a break of trust issue last year and since then, I've put a boundary such that I don't allow the person to take whatever I've done for granted anymore. It was initially a struggle wrapping my head around the breach. However, I let it to go after putting the boundary, although it comes up once in a while. A loved one wanted to down play it but I shut them down and told them that I'm the one who knew what my mental health went through during that hurt. So, I'm not going to take any advice on how I'm meant to give a second chance or forgive and forget. I didn't know how it could it one until when I experienced it.

[@Princess_Zo]

I'm proud of you sister for setting boundaries and upholding them. I know it's not easy, may Allah make things work out smoothly for you always

[@JH_77]

Bless you guys, all of you having gone through difficult times and breaking down one by one ,but keeping a brave face for us, to help us deal with it too

[@mohamedkhadar2020]

Before I opened the clip I saw the topic and realized Sumayah and Aliyah will be crying because of the topic me myself Cried subhaanalaah 😭😭😭

[@ayaatyoussef1443]

mashallah abowe qof raxmad badan baad tahay

[@hanoush101]

Community gena somalida aad buu u anfici laha barnamijyadan asago somali ku baxayo i wish that😢 So usefull ❤

[@ayaatyoussef1443]

@@hanoush101 waa runta abaayo laakiin dadkeena ma jecla vulnerable iyo reall in la noqdo qof kasta jaakat bir ah buu gashanyahay

[@hanoush101]

@@ayaatyoussef1443wlha wa xaqiiq taa emotional ba malaha allah noo sahlo😅😅

[@ayaatyoussef1443]

@@hanoush101 soo maad arag dadkeena are disconnected from emotion kooda waqti dheer bey igu qaadatay inaan fahmo waxa naga qaldan relationships keena kuligood waa superficial qofkii vulnerablity iyo intimacy muujiya doqon diciif ah ayaa loo arkaa

[@HB-jx8bb]

Cried with you sisters, thank you so much for not only talking about this but for letting me know that how I'm feeling is valid.

[@hawaosman4760]

It takes as long as it takes... hopefully you will find those who understand this and know its an individual thing, and won't be surprised with how it has affected you because its different for everyone. Most important, hold onto Allah and know that he understands, try to find a rope and don't let go of it, Allah will never abandon us. May Allah bless you all, we have truly benefited from this content and the benefit is from Allah. I thank you truly sisters. Jazaakum Allahu khayrun 💕

[@goodlifesince90]

Omg Soumeya and Aliyah 😭😭 are you ok sisters? May Allaah heal your pain💔💔 ..

[@nadirakabore6984]

Inna Lillahi wa Inna Lillahi Rajiun Sis, May Allah ta’A’la Makes Their Grave Spacious With Noor May He Forgives Their Sin and May He Grant them the Highest of Al Firdaus Amin and May He Gives you Strength and Comfort Amin🤲🏾🤲🏾

[@M.Sid9.3]

Aliyah. May Allah grant you more than your losses and grant you with abundance in both worlds. May Allah always guide you all and protect you all. We know that everything is temporary except for Allah and the Hereafter. May we have the pleasure of Allah and His Mercy to enter us into Firdaus Al A'la Aameen

[@AG-nz4pj]

Allahoema ameen!!

[@saburayusuf5635]

AMEEN 🤲🏾

[@jouwayriyaable]

Amin

[@BiliMaffy]

I love your honesty and being true to your grief. You didn't just title the topic but showed clearly how it's okay for us as believers to understand that grieving doesn't make you lesser of a believer. Your iman can be intact even when you allow your natural emotions to come out, rather than pull a strong face while dying inside. It's okay to cry unto Allah, in sujood, seated, standing, on a journey..anywhere and anyhow (within what's permissible). I feel you. May Allah comfort you Sisters, UmmRayan and Samayya. May Allah grant forbearance and victory to our brethren under siege. May Allah accept the martyrdom of the dead. Grief truly is a personal journey as mentioned by Layinka. Sending you love!

[@raheemahodusote4778]

Ameen.🤲

[@NabilConveys]

It was really hard watching this episode. May Allah, The Most Compassionate ease our pains and hardships. Ameen

[@nazeemahpretorius4615]

Wow sisters, umme raiyaan...you made me cry through the entire episode, alhamdulila crying is good...may Allah make easy our affairs, Ameen...i wish i could wipe ur tears and sister sumaya, but i am comforted with the thought that our Rabb is the Greatest, and is embracing all of us, every step of the way...i love you all for the sake of Allah

[@umuhannah2023]

I lost my mum two months ago she was my best friend 💔 most merciful person I have ever seen in my life ..اللهم اغفر لها وارحمها واسكنها فسيح جناتك

[@AG-nz4pj]

I want friends like thus

[@Aliyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

Same

[@Princess_Zo]

May الله guide you towards righteous companions 💕 may الله make you one of the righteous too

[@Princess_Zo]

To everyone who is going through some sort of grief: May Allah ease your pains and struggles, grant you sabrun jameel and reward you beautifully. ~From your sister in deen 💕🌹

[@mmmmmmm2971]

But what is grief .. if not love persevering.❤️

[@emadeldinfamily]

Beautiful episode sisters. Jazaka Allahu Khairan for sharing your thoughts, emotions, and advice. HTT is so incredibly important. Please keep doing these episodes they are helping so many people. 💐 🙏

[@Ayse-wf9es]

Salam, Can you lovely ladies do a tea talk on the subject of unrequited love? I know that it relates to the video on heartbreak, but I feel that unrequited love is a beast of its own. It's a common occurrence and the irony is that one can feel so much hurt for something they've never quite had to begin with, and because of this it is sometimes met with dismissal from people.

[@SF-pm1ov]

La Yinka... I feel you’re speaking right to me Subhan Allah. I needed your wisdom regarding this very topic and Alhamdulillah here it is. JazakhiAllah khayr

[@Lama-ys9by]

This episode just came right for me. Im experiencing a crisis, which I thought I had been overcome long time ago. I was losing hope in me and my ability to be. I was crying when you talked, cause I didnt had to held up this wall anymore. I can accept my grief about losing myself and just feel this heavy time, which will surely restore my entide identity. I dont need to resist the emotions my lord wants to me to feel, so that I can change. Youre so beautiful sisters. I pray that one day I could have a beautiful person on my side, like you are. Just understanding, accepting and consoling. Not resisting. May Allah grand you the highest place in paradise, my role models❤️

[@CoffeeKrayzee]

Thank you so much for this episode. I cried with you. We're all dealing with something tough

[@nakoa2746]

Thank you for this episode !

[@abdouliekinteh2800]

Patience or sabr is a great virtue.

[@uzmanasir69]

Speechless

[@Princess_Zo]

Jazakallah khayra for sharing these moments with us. It was very brave of Aliyah and Sumayah to be so raw with us and it's really appreciated. LaYinka - You were wonderful this episode. I'm sorry words fail me but know that we cried with you and pray Allah grants you beautiful patience and ease with the hardship 🌻

[@nimcajamaal6831]

A hug may not change the pain we go through but I just wanna hug y’all 😭😍. #virtual hugs to you sisters. Allah yasir ❤️

[@inesahmed883]

SubanaAllah it all came back Aliyah my hugs and love for you and the Sumeiya and Laykha,I also give GRATITUDE to the cameraman and all your team really Alhamdulilah it has been fruitful JizakaAllah kheir.

[@simansiman8385]

Love you guys

[@Abougoushh]

I think this is my favourite episode so far, so raw and real♥️ ahh I just I love all your episodes so much mashallah !

[@imeshe1884]

Absolutely love this sister circle 🤍

[@tanaswadvocacy3582]

May the most high ease your difficulties ♥️

[@Aliyahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

Omg the cat and the back story just made me cry so much. It's so true theres always a back story

[@Princess_Zo]

_You don't need to do to fix_ -- amazing.

[@ishasulayman7877]

I need to hear this! Thank you once again for delivering such amazing naseeha sisters! Barakahallahu feekum 💕

[@iman584]

Subhanallah- I needed to hear this today. Thank you sisters for making this video 💛😔

[@huda3762]

Was balling my eyes out on this episode. Helpful Allahuma barik

[@babylion2874]

I missed you guys.

[@irened8457]

My dua for aliya and her team. For your pain. We give u a hug

[@bakiatukoroma398]

Alhamdulilah...I really appreciate this episode. I admire your courage my sisters. May Allah swt make it easy for you sisters and us all. JZK💞💞

[@fatimar3276]

Feelings make us human ❤ hope you'll find ease

[@ameerahjussab4394]

Subhanallah. Never thought of loss like that. While I was listening to this I could relate to all of it. Even though I haven't lost a close loved one. I feel I've lost so much. Its really hard. May Allah pour His mercy and blessings on all of His creation. Allah bring ease.

[@rgoralwalla]

May Allah ease your pain sister Aliyah. I cried with you in this episode ❤

[@yvonnehorhager1238]

Ya Allah.. i felt this so much, every single word that was said.. and i really pray from the bottom of my heart that Allah makes it easy for you sisters. And everyone who goes through such tough things.. 🤲🏻🤲🏻♥️

[@apdullazizshukri1385]

Really i injoyed this topic dear sisters My Allaah. Protect to you from evil keep having faith and tolarance wish you the best

[@AK-jr5lb]

Thank you for this beautiful episode. May Allah SWT keep us on the straight path and unite us together in Jannah one day.

[@nazajalal8094]

May Allah reward you 🤲, I needed this 🌺

[@user-pc1qy5wg3y]

May Allah make it easy for you sis ♡ so raw and vulnerable. I would like to question a point that came up, about us being human before we are believers. Islam came to finetune the fitrah, not contradict it. Grief is a complex experience but I thought I would just prompt a different perspective. May Allah grant us ease ♡

[@LaYinkaSanni]

Yes, you're right. My point being the fact that there are those who declare shahadah and are believers, and those they don't, and despite that, we all have the very human experience of grief (and all other emotions). But yes, the fitra of all humans is belief in Allah.

[@M.Sid9.3]

@@LaYinkaSanni"Allah tests those whom He loves." May Allah be pleased with us all. Aameen

[@aishananyanzi7423]

Alhamdulillah for rhis episode. May Allah make it easy for everyone who is going through grief n loss. May Allah heal the world.Ameen.

[@shadyamohd4651]

Ma Sha Allah❤️

[@user-ot5yf9xp1n]

Aliyah I'm sorry. May Allah swt replace everything with so much more. Ameen.

[@uhktiscuisine2450]

Subhan Allah jazzakallahu hayran for all the vulnerability in this. I’ve been struggling lately with my emotions and some grief in all my trials I thank Allah I still have my faith in Him. I said I might loose many things but not my connection with Allah. It keeps me going everyday Alhamdulillah if all I can say with each moment. I have hope for a better future and Ultimately hope for jannah Insha Allah

[@Princess_Zo]

Allah ease your pain love 💕🌻 you're very strong to persevere as you have been doing. Know that Allah sees you and hears you and things surely will get lighter.

[@uhktiscuisine2450]

@@Princess_Zo jazzakallahu hayran for your kind words

[@fatimamohd832]

I cried too, so emotional. May almighty Allah bless

[@SKaya77]

Shed so many tears watching this, it was needed may Allah bless you all and give us all strength.

[@iradukundacynthia3038]

Ameen! Indeed. Thanks a lot for being vulnerable first, Aliyah: So sorry for your loss. May you get through however way that you can cause that’s okay. I completely agree with you. I recently lost someone dear to me and my family and have been thinking a lot about death, grief, loss, and how we react with it especially when it comes to how to comfort the close family members (spouse, children, etc.) and believe me it is not easy especially when everyone expects them to be strong (and that’s what we tell them, to be strong) but I also think that they don’t have to because it is really hard, of course if they want to and can, they can be strong, but let’s leave it to be their call. Yes we are humans and Allah only can help us through. May He brings comfort to those who lost their beloved ones in the past, and recently. Ameen! I love you ladies. May All your work count in front of Allah! Ameen♥️♥️♥️

[@maria7694]

I've just found your channel and this was so real. made me subscribe and want to watch your other videos. It's so nice to see Muslim women coming together to talk about real topics. these are the type of conversations we should all be having

[@candacecuffy3382]

Jazak'Allah

[@prasanna9270]

I am waiting for season 4 !! Plssss

[@hanoush101]

It was so emotional episode and Sometimes silence is the best way to treat your hurts😭😭 Allah bless u my dear sisters❤❤

[@aneesaidrees2532]

My heart goes out to you Aliyah. May Allah heal your heart and the heart of everyone going through grieve And when the time comes for Allah to test us with grieve may he grant us the fortitude to bear it all. Ameen

[@munanoor8539]

This episode was everything. May Allah reward you for being vulnerable with us. We cried with you and we laughed with you. Thank you once again. May every beautiful dua made by you and for you be answered ❤️

[@Princess_Zo]

Beautifully said

[@saikouceesay3056]

“Allah is with the patient ones” 🤲🏾 May all our hearts find peace 🤲🏾 Amiin 🙏🏾

[@reciterrahma3276]

May Allah forgive and protect all Muslims dead or alive and grant us jannah by His mercy Aameen yaa Rabb🤲🏼🤲🏼🤲🏼 May peace and blessings of Allah be upon our beloved prophet his companions and entire household✨✨✨

[@abdillahidjibril6871]

May Allah bless you more and keeps you Happy Aameen

[@oromochic1993]

Moments of silence 😔

[@dekab5657]

May Allah SwT bless you immensely for sharing . May Allah SwT make it easy for you and reward you immensely for your lost. May Allah SwT give you the patience to bear.

[@amirahabdi]

Allah does say in the quraan that we will not be left just to say I believe!! We will be tested with fear, hunger and loss of life, As Muslim we have to say Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un, and keep our sabr and know that Allah will reward us in this world and next,

[@SF-pm1ov]

Aliyah making me cry buckets Subhan Allah

[@Sumayyahsikiru]

Thank you. And I pray Allah grant s you all succor🥺❤️

[@SF-pm1ov]

Alhamdulillah