Healing Fearful Avoidant Attachment Style: Techniques & Tips For Transformation | HealingFa.com

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Paulien Timmer - Healing the fearful avoidant

Paulien Timmer - Healing the fearful avoidant

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 357
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 2 жыл бұрын
Ready to truly heal? The Healed & Happy online program is now OPEN: healingthefearfulavoidant.com/healedandhappy/
@advaitakulkarni9799
@advaitakulkarni9799 Жыл бұрын
I really need to do this but the prices are real high. Like real. I’m a student n Indian can’t really pay 67k . It’s sad . But thank you for the video!
@Annieqt
@Annieqt Жыл бұрын
OMG! I have the tapping meditation app and never thought that it could help me to heal from My FA attachment! I’m so glad that I watched this vidéo of yours! Thank you Paulien!
@ImaginarySusan
@ImaginarySusan Жыл бұрын
PAULINE! My first time meeting you. How coincidental that I am struggling currently with these challenges. The HEIDE PRIEBE videos on Avoidant Attachment have helped me make progress and I'm so grateful YOU popped up.! You are no😅w an official friend and mentor on my path to healing!😊 ImaginarySusan 🔥💜🫶🙏🌞
@curdqueenbutterchurnesquir7263
@curdqueenbutterchurnesquir7263 11 ай бұрын
I sobbed throughout the entirety of two of your videos so far. Thank you.
@nicolacabasvidani2510
@nicolacabasvidani2510 8 ай бұрын
Those words are magical: "You can 100 percent heal this"
@bm5_5_5
@bm5_5_5 2 ай бұрын
Needed to hear this ❤
@niche_interest
@niche_interest Жыл бұрын
I fear feeling trapped, not being able to leave somehow (irrationally); screwing up my life, losing the stability I've built for myself. That's my core fear.
@JonasAnandaKristiansson
@JonasAnandaKristiansson Жыл бұрын
Yesss
@teresa1710
@teresa1710 11 ай бұрын
I agree ❤
@ciaraskeleton
@ciaraskeleton 8 ай бұрын
Yeah fear of being smothered is another rational core fear. That's one of my big fears. The fear of having my autonomy taken, the fear of abandoning myself. But you have to face that and show yourself that you won't abandon yourself no matter what. So boundaries. Saying no. Staying engaged in all of your interests as well as socialising and being with others. Sounds impossible now, but you'll get there. FA attachment is a mixture of a lot of fears, handled via avoidance
@samyasiddiqui3735
@samyasiddiqui3735 3 ай бұрын
Me too
@bm5_5_5
@bm5_5_5 2 ай бұрын
SAME
@ZetsubouBlack
@ZetsubouBlack 2 жыл бұрын
I don't know if anyone has ever told you that, Paulien, but you are saving a lot of souls here. Thank you
@steffiyoung1
@steffiyoung1 Жыл бұрын
I agree ... Paulien has been the only reason I've had hope in healing this. Her videos are so powerful and her approach so beautiful and gentle 💗
@rawann1001
@rawann1001 5 ай бұрын
Yes❤
@jaemaxx
@jaemaxx 2 жыл бұрын
11:40- 15:10 NOTE TO SELF Tapping sequence to be done daily
@reshmaroselinemony6267
@reshmaroselinemony6267 2 жыл бұрын
Fear of rejection Fear of abandonment Fear of being unworthy and bad Also the fear of being unworthy of love because I am bad
@LowEffortDoodles
@LowEffortDoodles 11 ай бұрын
Honestly, I have just started watching your channel. But I'm so glad someone out there is helping Avoidant Attachment rather than just selling them like: " AVOID THESE TYPE OF PPL. THEY R BAD AT RELATIONSHIPS. BLABLA. ITS ALWAYS THEIR FAULT. NOT URS CUS THEY'RE AVOIDANT " so, thank you.
@anitachhun4145
@anitachhun4145 2 жыл бұрын
It’s so funny to me that everyone started sobbing during the EFT… I started sobbing even before that, just as she was explaining the core fears. Thank you soooooo much for this.
@paulinax894
@paulinax894 2 жыл бұрын
Omg same
@IKFKSwitch
@IKFKSwitch 9 ай бұрын
The minute I started with my pinky palm... and began to feel the discomfort due to my sensory processing disorder.... If I weren't on a lunch break at work, it'd be Niagara Falls. 😭😭
@Dreamweaver777
@Dreamweaver777 Жыл бұрын
She starts the exercise around min 11:45 for those who are returning daily to learn. Like me. You mention "girls" twice in your awsome talk. Men suffer terribly from this as well. Thank you for the video.
@martinisawe6300
@martinisawe6300 2 ай бұрын
As a guy I suffer badly with FA
@interestingtimes6242
@interestingtimes6242 Ай бұрын
I dare say a man who suffers from FA is in a worse spot than a woman. A woman will receive more empathy than a man, doesn’t have to deal with approach anxiety, making a move, planning, and is far more likely to have a support structure in her life.
@tonywanders256
@tonywanders256 Жыл бұрын
Whoever you are out there: You deserve to love oneself. You’re allowed to receive love and to give love. I love you, Mr Universe.
@smOVERCOMINGITALL
@smOVERCOMINGITALL 11 ай бұрын
My husband is anxious-preoccupied and I feel like his reaction to things further feeds my fears.
@yongzhang1148
@yongzhang1148 9 ай бұрын
This video is absolutely gold. As a person who watched 10 self improvment videos a day not one has resonated with me so deeply. Seeing how this video has only gotten 76k views is just way to little for the amount of amazing information in this one video.I hope it finds more people who need it. And I'm so glad it found me.
@morehn
@morehn 3 жыл бұрын
I just turned 35, not married, and most of my friends got married by 24. I need some major clarity. Lots of fears and anxieties once I begin to discuss more than the weather with a girl. I like psychoanalyzing everyone and controlling my environment.
@moulee7448
@moulee7448 3 жыл бұрын
Heyy just take one step at a time.I know it feels so exhausting and annoying many times.We will heal from this❤❤❤
@thomasbrown3793
@thomasbrown3793 3 жыл бұрын
I have a hard time making friends if I can't control my environment
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
It's so logical you psychoanalyze and try to control your environment. You just want to be safe. To be sure you won't get hurt. You long for connection, but at the same time you are really afraid to get hurt. It's so logical, AND you can heal this. Today there will be a new video out that I would love for you to watch. You actually have gifts that are now clouded by fear, but that you will share naturally once you heal. You are not behind, and you are not broken.
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
What is your fearbrain telling you will happen when you don't control your environment?
@thomasbrown3793
@thomasbrown3793 3 жыл бұрын
@@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 That I won't be able to maintain any kind of boundary
@aritranaruto
@aritranaruto 10 ай бұрын
I think you missed the part where I as an FA am overwhelmed by the closeness, and fear that my partner will cross our boundaries unabated and hurt me, and coerce me into something I couldn't accept.
@KelseaRoxOutLoud
@KelseaRoxOutLoud 2 жыл бұрын
telling myself I’m good enough, that I deeply love myself, that I don’t want to miss out on things in my life because of these patterns always makes me sob. it’s so hard to believe that I’m good enough, but I know I am. thank you
@OBNfull1000
@OBNfull1000 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for this. EFT session got me sobbing. I've been in a FA pattern with my partner and it's getting frustrating that I can't break it. Everything you said is what I'm going through. Feeling the doubts pushing away, hurting my partner, afraid he'll leave me the more I keep bringing up my doubts. I just hope I can heal from this soon because it's been so exhausting for both of us.
@RozCamille
@RozCamille 3 жыл бұрын
I relate to this so much 😢
@Stephmargeth
@Stephmargeth 2 жыл бұрын
Me too
@nateo200
@nateo200 2 жыл бұрын
Man I am not FA but this helped a ton! Not gonna lie I did feel some strong feelings :) I suddenly remembered doing this as a kid! Didn't think it was a serious thing.
@Nicole_Riviere
@Nicole_Riviere 2 жыл бұрын
❤️
@CazKing43
@CazKing43 Жыл бұрын
How did it go? I’m just getting to know someone and discovered I have a FA attachment…I don’t want him to leave either 😢😢😢
@Holly-j7f
@Holly-j7f 3 ай бұрын
Securely-attached person here and I just went through that with you so I would better understand what my girlfriend will experience and I'm over here crying now. What a beautiful technique. Love is so beautiful.
@Terapie_Lesem
@Terapie_Lesem 3 ай бұрын
You are a beautiful person yourself, learning how to understand your girlfriend who is struggling!
@Horeskat
@Horeskat 2 жыл бұрын
i am going for 12 month EFT therapy for my depression and anxiety... and it is working!!!! i am not cured :D and i need to see another therapist for talking therapy but i am so much better. i highly recommend it.
@j_fitzu
@j_fitzu Жыл бұрын
I love to read this because im really struggling with my Depression and Anxiety right now.
@MarkfromLodiCA
@MarkfromLodiCA 5 күн бұрын
I did tapping to quit a 50 year habit of smoking.(.12 years cig free)..now, to heal this fearful/dismissive avoidant inner child. Thank you, I will do this for a month during my other learning.
@dayuari4435
@dayuari4435 Жыл бұрын
I cried a lot after tapping and my heart beats so fast. Thank you so much!😊❤
@Afterword.
@Afterword. 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for focusing on avoidants with compassion. That seems strangely rare. Some people seem to think avoidant = jerk. But that's not true. Jerks can be avoidants, but avoidants aren't jerks. I have subscribed and want to learn more. Your manner is so reassuring and... safe... that, well, until now I didn't realize how scared I really am. How I need reassurance too. I just express it differently. I have been moving more and more to healing from an avoidant style - even before I understood the term - but it's still there.
@Peaceout4337
@Peaceout4337 3 жыл бұрын
As a master EFT practitioner for about 16 years- you did a fantastic job and you are adorable! Great work !!!
@Peaceout4337
@Peaceout4337 3 жыл бұрын
Also, please put that you tap on the description- I had no idea this was going to happen in this video and it was wonderful
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
Ahh thank you so much, that's so sweet! I will, good idea!
@mprub4
@mprub4 2 жыл бұрын
I felt nothing meaningful during the tapping session but afterwards I did feel peaceful. I felt like I wanted to keep going. I think my body had a guard up but with repetition I hope I will start to feel more. Thank you for this.
@irenenjeri8720
@irenenjeri8720 Жыл бұрын
I wish healing on everyone who is fearful avioidant because no matter how much you are loyal, and assure that you won't leave it will always be a barrier.
@nicolewaltemate3425
@nicolewaltemate3425 8 ай бұрын
Another core fear that is super strong is fear of betrayal. That one is stronger for me than rejection
@Compassion3333
@Compassion3333 3 жыл бұрын
Wow! Words can’t describe how supportive, impactful and healing this all was! I balled my eyes out during the EFT with your words! If you ever feel called to do guided meditation EFT healing videos that would be absolutely heavenly !!!! Finally found out something wasn’t permanently wrong with me that I had no idea how to describe why I was the way I was!!!! You’re the most resonate person on this topic and it’s really supporting my healing and restoring hope to my process ! Thank you!
@OfficialFloydboy
@OfficialFloydboy 3 жыл бұрын
As a Scorpio.. I feel many of us are naturally inclined to experience this. Amazing video, thank you.
@tiaho-whetuford5338
@tiaho-whetuford5338 3 жыл бұрын
🦂🌞 to every dark aspect of you their is a brighter side
@OfficialFloydboy
@OfficialFloydboy 3 жыл бұрын
@@tiaho-whetuford5338 I dig that 🦂🙏🏾
@brianhoneycutt5938
@brianhoneycutt5938 3 жыл бұрын
My mom is Scorpio sun Scorpio moon both squared by pluto and pretty dang avoidant. Hkwever my pisces sun libra moon dad was even more so, possibly due to being male and a military background with him and his dad.
@Pinelliephe
@Pinelliephe 2 жыл бұрын
this attachment style is commonly picked up from childhood neglect and abuse, not zodiacs :/
@googoolars
@googoolars 2 жыл бұрын
Scorpio on 7H cusp, Chiron scorpio 7H
@Mr.Yang823
@Mr.Yang823 10 күн бұрын
I am so tired of myself and not able to open up, receive, and give genuine love.
@joanamoreira250
@joanamoreira250 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you Paulien! You are helping me a lot because I've recently discovered that I have this attachment. Once I took the time to really think about my life I realized I had traumatic childhood experiences. I had a very emotional unstabled father that wasn't supportive of my achievements (only my mother would get excited for me), would forget to pick me up in school while I was waiting hours for him, would never ask me questions about my day or my life and would only talk about himself and many more things. You are not alone guys
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
Ah I'm sending love to little Joana
@raniaramadan3819
@raniaramadan3819 3 жыл бұрын
I have the same father Plus He used to hit me , i remember one day i was bullied at school and i was in so much pain and he blamed me for being bullied! And he hit me so hard that my mums earning went off her ear while trying to protect me! That was about 2009 and it hurt as it was yesterday I now am facing huge intimacy issues and i have just discovered that i am that avoidant attachment and i need to fix this before it's too late🥲
@Skimmerlit
@Skimmerlit 2 жыл бұрын
I wasn’t expecting that to work, and I felt silly doing it, but I feel beyond relaxed now. Thank you.
@nm0574
@nm0574 Жыл бұрын
I came across your channel and i noticed a lot of the things you sajd resonated with how i behaved and how my lady herself is and i asked for a break. Thats how i found you and then you feeling that "out of love" with your now husband and me feeling those doubts scare me out of wanting to commit. I felt... right to be here. Sure its while we are on break and i dont know if shell take me back after these two weeks. This is day 2 and day 1 was EXCRUCIATING. Today i think more rationally and im taking actual action to heal myself and, if possible, save my relationship. Shes amazing yet i know we have our own crap to work on. As long as shes willing to give me space and is willing to work on herself too, im confident. Doing the tapping and what you were saying is EXACTLY what was going through my head and i felt relaxed. I felt hopeful. I felt strong and stable. Thank you for opening a path and bringing awareness to not only the attachment style but a way to heal. You're awesome!!
@butterchicken2328
@butterchicken2328 Жыл бұрын
i cried during the tapping session ❤ really felt so relieved after it happened. Thank you so much!!💗
@millania2108
@millania2108 Жыл бұрын
I must admit I was so sceptical, after trying speech therapy and meditation, antidepressants and a lot of other things I was like: Alright this is most likely one of those "Buy my course to learn how to magically heal" videos but it certainly wasn't. I can't explain how peaceful I felt after EFT and I'm thankful for having some new hope I can heal. I will definitely watch your other videos soon, thanks a lot. :)
@JonasAnandaKristiansson
@JonasAnandaKristiansson Жыл бұрын
"Meditation" isn't something one can "do" or "try". It is the Pure state of Being. The Essence of what and who you truly Are. Om Shanti
@EE-ut1wn
@EE-ut1wn 2 жыл бұрын
I recently started dating someone I've loved for a long time, but I feel so fearful that it's hard for me to enjoy our time together. I worrying that im going to be to clingy, or not present enough for her. Part of me wants to go back to being friends because dating feels to raw and intimate that it hurts. I keep feeling my subconscious shut her out and push her away to protect myself from potential hurt even though I want to be close to her and I want to trust her. But at the same time I'm so afraid of letting her down. She asked me out first, but I still feel inadequate and unworthy to be with her. Trying to watch videos like this in effort to get better. Thanks for reading, and I wish you all the best.
@trinoochoa-l6j
@trinoochoa-l6j 4 ай бұрын
I am on the opposite side of this. Although it doesn't feel good to be stonewalled, I can assure you, they likely understand why you are withdrawing, and if you trust them, they can help you through it all.. Also, they are likely a lot tougher than you think.
@edlakota
@edlakota 2 жыл бұрын
Jesus Christ Pauline, the depth and truth you speak about our FA lives is just staggering. Its so reassuring to hear someone explain all of the"weird" things we notice about ourselves and moreover the chance to heal
@ImaginarySusan
@ImaginarySusan Жыл бұрын
You actually should have Typed, Thank you as the first word. Thankyou, Jesus Christ... honest. We are.
@MartinTheCoach
@MartinTheCoach 2 жыл бұрын
Wow, the demonstration of the (Emotional Freedom Technique) was precise. Very straightforward.
@destinybre2073
@destinybre2073 2 жыл бұрын
I really hope you see my message. I tired this today and felt nothing for a couple minutes not even sure if it was working than I waited out of no where I started crying and I could remember the times I felt loved thank you !
@acostaleeann1
@acostaleeann1 2 жыл бұрын
I’m crying my eyes out… thank you so much..
@reahstarr9263
@reahstarr9263 7 ай бұрын
For me I’m aware and afraid of having my freedom taken away and I’m afraid of not making the right choice, I need to be sure. I’m not afraid of rejection or abandonment, Im scared of commitment and I’m certain of what I want, but I want to make sure I make the right choice that’s a challenge to me, not knowing if it’s the right choice or if I am making a mistake. So I avoid romantic relationships and dating with men but I do have many men friends and women friends, I don’t go any further then just being friends with men. I love myself and I’m secure with myself and I’m independent but I know I’m an avoidant so I’m working on that and trying to heal before anything. Thank you for sharing your KZbin video, I have been trying to heal from my avoidant attachment issue.
@breathing99
@breathing99 10 күн бұрын
wanna know how you are healing any resources u can share
@ivanrychkov
@ivanrychkov 2 жыл бұрын
I tried to do this technique along with the video and after a couple of minutes I felt extreme relaxation and almost fell asleep. I felt no stress and muscle ache. Thank you so much! Even though I know stress will eventually return, I will be ready to work it out next time)) And thanks for the theory, this was exactly what I was searching for. Understanding that you are not alone and all broken is very important.
@trudyvalkyr3005
@trudyvalkyr3005 2 жыл бұрын
EFT starts at 11:47
@Awiemilyn
@Awiemilyn 3 жыл бұрын
I totally cried doing that tapping omg.. thanks it's been hard feeling lately.
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
Ahh giving you a big hug! So good to release it
@ma.trixiafayeordonia1401
@ma.trixiafayeordonia1401 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you. Cried a lot tonight. I've gone emotional. I felt like I was being held and safe... Thank you! ❤️
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
Ahh
@stephanyg2208
@stephanyg2208 Жыл бұрын
Your channel has been the best I have found in fearful avoidant attachment. You truly have a gift! Please do more video like this!!
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for being here❤
@prosperousandwealthy888
@prosperousandwealthy888 Жыл бұрын
I was a little skeptical but then I did it and I started crying. This was very healing thanks for sharing💝
@MiaWoods-z6i
@MiaWoods-z6i 2 ай бұрын
This just opened the door for me! The tapping was monumental!
@almilamim
@almilamim 29 күн бұрын
im feeling so relaxed and happy now doing this EFT. Thank you for sharing us❤. Mostly i fould myself im sabotaging myself in so many situation and self awareness is helpin me so much 🎉
@mpumi6830
@mpumi6830 2 жыл бұрын
This experience was so unexpected and so strange! This was my first time doing this and I broke down in tears. I appreciate this and will be adding it to my self soothing techniques. Thanks Paulien
@auraliax1323
@auraliax1323 2 жыл бұрын
This is the 1st video i see of you & i cried so much, thanks for all of this♥️♥️
@brandonhemoi3853
@brandonhemoi3853 2 жыл бұрын
My second time tapping…and it always makes me laugh and enjoy myself. I feel better afterwards.
@KB-xs4cl
@KB-xs4cl 3 жыл бұрын
That was a really great tapping session, Paulein. I definitely felt the tension welling up/triggers. Need to do a few more rounds. Thank you! ❤
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
I'm so happy it was valuable! Tapping is such a magical, powerful tool. Have you gotten around to more rounds? Let me know if you have questions!
@busyazn
@busyazn 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you! 11:14 EFT start
@PinguinoFino
@PinguinoFino 3 ай бұрын
You are a hero. Thank you.
@LindsayLohan1
@LindsayLohan1 3 ай бұрын
I’m happy I found your channel. I’m almost 27 but have never been in a relationship because I often ghost people after a first date due to my extreme fear of vulnerability and rejection, and it’s led to a really depressing loneliness. So I’m grateful that you’re providing free videos to help people with these issues. ❤☺️
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 2 ай бұрын
So happy you are here, and I wish for you to be surrounded by love and support. You've always deserved it.
@caparzzo
@caparzzo 3 жыл бұрын
Tears got me by surprise in the eft exercise
@Jd19808
@Jd19808 Жыл бұрын
I definitely shed tears and feel emotional..
@theblackandwhitecate
@theblackandwhitecate 3 жыл бұрын
This is so helpful. I have saved this video to watch over and over. If you make more tapping examples, I will totally use them too. Having your voice to repeat after makes it easier to do. You have such a peaceful way of speaking.
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
Ah thanks so much, that's so kind. I will put 'more tapping video's' on the list!
@LeosBeats
@LeosBeats 2 жыл бұрын
@@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 please do! I broke down in tears doing this for the first time and it feels like a huge relief. I haven’t cried in years. Thanks so much for the technique looking forward for more!
@haja707
@haja707 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this! I just recently found out about the avoidant attachement, i always wondered what is wrong with me and why I am like this, this is helping me so much! Thank you!
@luissantiago5434
@luissantiago5434 3 ай бұрын
Even though I was hesitant to try the tapping example at first I decided to go along with it. I can’t explain the sensation m, but somehow I started crying as I repeated the mantra. What an interesting concept. I’m happy to have bumped into this video.
@ra4798
@ra4798 2 жыл бұрын
I felt goosebumps all over my body and also yawning. Hope I will heal. Thanks Paulien
@goldenlioness5140
@goldenlioness5140 2 жыл бұрын
Waow.. Tears was just running down att ease after the last two senteces.. thank you for opening Up this Door of nft to me 💜🙏
@ConsciouslyActive
@ConsciouslyActive 3 ай бұрын
Thank you greatly I’ve been doing it for around 2 weeks and it’s helped me so much already I feel connected with my partner a lot more you are a life saver and I’m continuing to work through my traumas and situations of the past
@jaquedamasceno01
@jaquedamasceno01 Жыл бұрын
I felt extreme relaxed
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Жыл бұрын
I'm so happy it was valuable! Tapping is such a magical, powerful tool. Have you gotten around to more rounds? Let me know if you have questions
@jaquedamasceno01
@jaquedamasceno01 Жыл бұрын
@@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 I did it 2 times yesterday, and the feeling of disconfort coming from my fear of closeness fadeded for few hours . Thank you so much !
@BogdanCalcan
@BogdanCalcan Жыл бұрын
Very interesting... it gave a lot to think about and I came back a few times to your videos. I realise I do have this attachment style. EFT is new to me. On a separate note (and I hope you don't find this comment inappropriate): you are so beautiful 😮
@BestFloridaRealtors
@BestFloridaRealtors Жыл бұрын
Thank you ❤
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for being here!
@tammysims8716
@tammysims8716 3 жыл бұрын
You look like Lisa Kudrow and are really pretty. Thanks 4 the video too.
@pattarachaijarat7931
@pattarachaijarat7931 Ай бұрын
hello im mr. anxious who in bettween grab about secure and in secure im here because my girl is FV hehe i wish she watched it and know that there is person who truly love her im rooting for u nakub 🥺
@samyasiddiqui3735
@samyasiddiqui3735 3 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 😭
@googoolars
@googoolars 3 жыл бұрын
Tapping at 11:45
@JimmyJamesMarquees
@JimmyJamesMarquees 3 жыл бұрын
You have no clue on what this means to me. 32 year old man who has been having a lot of issues in relationships my whole life. Im now truly in love for the first time in years, again experiencing these fears and I felt it is time to actually really try to fix this. And all your said at the start of the video really hit home. And then the tapping… I cried like a little baby 😅 Im seeing a therapist, reading books and now this video. I finally have some believe that I can actually feel love, which is honestly crazy for me to believe. Hartstikke bedankt Paulien ❤️
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
Aw wat fijn dat je hier bent Jimmy :)
@ancala4140
@ancala4140 2 жыл бұрын
Mind to share the books here Jim?
@nikstar1313
@nikstar1313 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you eternally Paulien. On the waiting list for 2022! On a mission (not time based obviously) to heal my FAAS- I was unfortunate to be born into this world in 75 to two narcissist parents who enjoyed tormenting each other (and me!) through their own inter generation trauma and too stubborn to “lose” as codependency was so rife in fear of being alone. As the high achieving straight A student and truth teller family scapegoat I am breaking this cycle and trying to not be too self destructive with my coping mechanisms re: the smear campaign happening as we speak. Never has one person asked me my side. I have a great Schema therapist who changed everything for me.. It’s just unbelievable and incomprehensible how much these family members WANT us to hurt due to their own issues, it’s sooo sick. So much for family means everything. I asked my mother once if she cares about my feelings and she replied with “to a certain extent” .. that’s what I’m dealing with. No contact 1 year and in ALOT of pain. Suicidal with no plan and very depressed and just so tired all the time. I feel that anxiety paralysis a lot and really accepting that I literally have no one. I asked why god wasn’t a woman at 6 and was in so much trouble for being inquisitive and kicked out of Sunday school. All my friends (I am 46) are toxic people (from way back in high school-30 year relationships- ALL very insecure people who deflect and project like my mother so I cut them all off within 2 years of finding out I was narcissistically abused and the FSG. They all want me to change back to the enabling fawner that I was. No way. I feel like I’ve just left a religious cult and learning how to even live and interact with people. I’m a writer and social worker who struggles a lot with self subjugation. My father drummed into me that I am a “nothing”. Those were his words for as long as I can remember. My mother was silent in seeing me being abused repeatedly and partaking in it too and actually blames me as a child for their issues! The hypocrisy! It’s a tough journey, I can’t believe how brainwashed I was. Lots of Love from Tasmania, Australia xx
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 2 жыл бұрын
Gosh Nikki, reading this breaks my heart. You are amazing for breaking the cycle. You deserve peace, calm, and true unconditional love.
@Neeshad22
@Neeshad22 Жыл бұрын
Brought me to tears.
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Жыл бұрын
@ConsciouslyActive
@ConsciouslyActive 3 ай бұрын
Your such an amazing person you have helped me so much already and I just came to your channel thank you for being a wonderful individual ❤
@Googleuser-jv8fi
@Googleuser-jv8fi 3 жыл бұрын
I feel calmer . This was my first time trying it
@asher0uw
@asher0uw 2 жыл бұрын
with my ex i realized later i was anxiously clinging to the stability of the relationship even though i was distancing myself from my partner by the end
@bcount1
@bcount1 2 жыл бұрын
thank you so much! I almost cried! I know I'm fearful avoidant being rejected by my mother my whole life. I"m tired of ruining my relationships.
@skeeterskater5884
@skeeterskater5884 3 жыл бұрын
Good video! Thanks On this journey as an avoidant voyager, I found that writing out a childhood autobiography was very cathartic AND will allow you to piece together themes that reveal themselves as triggers. I have found written Gestalt Rx to be very helpful to reprogram the broken record of childhood negative self-talk... See the book "Why We Pick the Mates We Do" by Anne Teachworth. IMHO, one needs both cognitive and visceral inputs to re-calibrate ones' emotions
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely! Thanks for adding this!
@tinywhiskers30
@tinywhiskers30 2 жыл бұрын
I recognize I am an avoidant but I feel like I have a fear of romantic emotions because I'm afraid if I get into a relationship that I might be accidentally settling for less, or that I'm gonna have to conform to what my partner wants for the rest of my life and that I'm trapped in it forever and I'm having trouble finding ways to fix it.
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 2 жыл бұрын
What you might be feeling is the fear of putting up boundaries and expressing your needs. Because when you have a belief that it is not safe to do that, or that you are not allowed to that, commitment becomes very black and white: you either have to completely conform and do everything the other person wants, or you can be alone and do what you want. There is a world of possibilities and opportunities inbetween, when you feel (more) comfortable voicing your needs and boundaries!
@tinywhiskers30
@tinywhiskers30 2 жыл бұрын
@@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Woah, thank you Paulien! In just one comment you gave me such a big realization. I think I know where to start to improve now, thank you so much for your advice!!!
@rihambadawi2398
@rihambadawi2398 4 ай бұрын
Thank u ❤️
@rburudi
@rburudi 2 жыл бұрын
❤ i felt relaxed after the eft, it was intense and it felt amazing! will definitely be doing this
@snowcloudmxpuntodeventaenl30
@snowcloudmxpuntodeventaenl30 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you Paulina, as a fearful avoidant, I found this video helpful and I look forward to watching your other videos.
@mapetidye
@mapetidye 9 ай бұрын
“Maybe it’s safe to love” triggered the faucet in my eyes. Bc I always have wanted to believe that but all my life I’ve been given proof of nothing but the opposite ….its never been safe for me to love in my 25 years on this earth, not in love, not in family, not in friends, not in adult authorities, in nothing and nobody…not even in myself sometimes.
@tracyharris4337
@tracyharris4337 Жыл бұрын
Oh this brought tears 😢thank you so much for this 🙏🏾
@Gypsygal1024
@Gypsygal1024 3 жыл бұрын
I had no idea EFT tapping could help with this!! So glad I found your video 💞
@michaelpatrickmilligan
@michaelpatrickmilligan Жыл бұрын
You're really good. You provide very clear information. I was a bit shocked to hear F-bombs, and it would have been awkward for me to sharing it with the people I wanted to.
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Жыл бұрын
I am happy to hear its resonating with you. Thank you for being here❤
@fredsifyable
@fredsifyable 2 жыл бұрын
Ur video might have saved my life.. thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️
@lifeisbeautiful7047
@lifeisbeautiful7047 2 жыл бұрын
111 I've seen many videos on this topic, but this one ! Oh it hits so different !!
@bigdken89
@bigdken89 6 ай бұрын
Thank you.🙏🏿
@하요-l5h
@하요-l5h Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much❤ Actually, i didn't allow that i have fearful avoidant attachment, but finally,,,, i allow.. And your video is really helpful for me!! Thank you for making videos regarding my attachment❤ I'm gonna watch your all videos😊and i wanna heal my fearful something Have a lovely day❤️❤️
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Жыл бұрын
I am so happy to have you here!❤
@OrisStories
@OrisStories Жыл бұрын
Thank you. You helped me during a pretty bad panic attack this morning 🙏
@cecilieavaldorff8449
@cecilieavaldorff8449 Жыл бұрын
This is the best video i have seen about F/AA! You gave me so much encouragement! Thank you so much, you just got a new subscriber ❤
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870
@paulientimmer-healingthefe9870 Жыл бұрын
Thank you for being here!!
@PeachyBunzFitness
@PeachyBunzFitness 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for creating this video. The technique was amazing, after feeling more relaxed I burst into tears lol. I adore your energy 🤍 thank you again.
@kimiko_111
@kimiko_111 2 жыл бұрын
I definitely shed some tears doing this, I definitely needed this, thank you 🙏🏽
@lumpyrex007
@lumpyrex007 Жыл бұрын
yo, THANKS! I do tapping with brad. This was so great and tailored to me.
@rawann1001
@rawann1001 5 ай бұрын
Thank you ❤🇪🇬
@rooa9547
@rooa9547 Жыл бұрын
Thanks .I really appreciate 🙏 🙌 ❤
@Angell_Lee
@Angell_Lee 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you soooo much! I sub to thank you, you are amazing xo I am an avoidant attachment, because of my childhood traumas. I love to heal myself :)
@rooa9547
@rooa9547 Жыл бұрын
I really appreciate your work Thanks 😊 All love to you
@katelinlee7538
@katelinlee7538 2 жыл бұрын
I watched the whole video and as soon as we started the EFT I was crying… I didn’t expect it but wow. Thank you for all this information ❤️
@davidmcmullen2669
@davidmcmullen2669 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your message of hope that I can have relationships and not destroy them (without understanding why).
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