how to *actually* be yourself

[@xXCyberelfexX]

I once heard someone say that instead of "becoming" yourself we might just start with unbecoming everything that's not us. And that's the key I think

[@lexalger]

love this way of looking at it!

[@sofdemi8042]

Yes, this!

[@destrim7]

This!!!!

[@asmanilyna4745]

but what if there's nothing left

[@hahaha-pl7ev]

@@asmanilyna4745 then that’s you

[@marycopper4463]

being yourself was never to be liked by other people. being rejected for who you are actually feels so good in a way

[@katherinegreen1117]

That’s a really cool perspective on things ✏️

[@rosie6]

Thanks that’s so wise and wonderful

[@priyankadey2620]

Yeah being ourselfs can piss people off

[@mikaylasmith7600]

Tbh, getting off of Instagram helped me a lot with being myself again. I felt like my choices were mine again and it was not being dictated by the thought of posting on social media.

[@samkcatladyaks]

I’ve been off 3 years (I have tried going back 2 times and each time I was over it in less than a week). It’s life changing, isn’t it:)

[@mikaylasmith7600]

@@samkcatladyaks It do be, it really do.

[@priyankaperes6894]

I just quit it for this exact reason! So glad its working out for you :)

[@joya91]

I deleted mine last Summer and it's really a beautiful thing. Now, I have a finsta with no posts but I follow all the queer party promoters I can find cause duh.

[@37gamefly]

yess. I took like 2 years off instagram and twitter and thats when i really realized how harshly i was comparing my life to socialites and celebrities. It was a good choice to take that break.

[@SwashBuckTief]

4:08 "care what you think more" I love this so much

[@IndefinableSin]

I feel like out of all the KZbinrs I follow, you're one of the few who always feels like they're prioritising being themselves in their content, and I love that about you as an artist. Many KZbinrs will prioritize what they know is trendy, which isn't a bad business strategy, but the fact that you follow your joy rather than ours keeps this channel feeling fresh. As such, you're one of the few for me who've lasted the test of time. Keep being you Jade!

[@kayoconey7198]

YES

[@ieshasnow]

Loved everything about this video. I turn 30 this year and you realize that a lot of things/opinions don't matter. You are who you are.

[@Neurozumim]

Your name and what you said reminded me of Kesha - We R Who We R (old song already).

[@brinyabain]

Turning 30 soon is doing that for me to! it’s like something is just clicking like it hasn’t before about the beauty of authenticity

[@kennyjac]

To the wallflowers tho, if that's what you like to be, then embrace it. Don't feel like you have to be a super outgoing and social person to be happy. Listen to your body 💙

[@sydneygartmond811]

“I like to live my life constantly experiences my own decisions and not somebody else’s” YES! SAY IT AGAIN! ONE MO TIME! KEEP GOINGGGG!

[@briannahall6828]

“I was watching, a very queer program…” lmfaooo

[@hg926]

i'm with all this, but i don't understand the disdain for wallflowers. i genuinely enjoy going out and chilling and watching folks, and i feel like the "be yourself" crowd doesn't recognize wallflowers as people who are being themselves just because it isn't exciting to them.

[@Theyarefulloffear]

I like people watching a lot and I really just don't have much to say a whole lot of the time I relate to this a lot

[@myhextixmind8632]

this!

[@bethanylnguyen]

"ROSA - bring it to the front" had me falling out and praise stepping not gonna lie

[@rmboothe]

The “just have fun” and respecting yourself more was spot on. All of your advice is the exact opposite of click baiting videos, it’s so true and original. Thanks again Jade! Wish my younger self could have heard that advice 10 years ago

[@Ali_Aktbabwa]

I needed to gear this today. I got called crazy my whole laugh just because I am goofy and have a lot of energy. At my new job, im slowly starting to be myself and now I'm making friends and getting invited to there group outings. They think I'm funny and sit next to me at break. It feels good that I'm being myself and its working out😇

[@Ali_Aktbabwa]

Update: my friendly coworkers made my heart melt when I was dookien it up in the restroom and late to lunch break. "My chair" was the only one open. Such a simple yet sweet thing idk if they knew how much it ment to me. Last weekend, plans fell thorough but this weekend they introduced me to their partners, showed me pictures to their children and even got envited out again next weekend. The language barrier and not code switching is the only thing that is hard about being myslef with my new friends, but it is so fun/funny at the same time...lots of hand movements and gestures are evolved👌 I was even so brave to send this video via snapchat to my me friends. They loved it...I am thankful and happy. Thank you again

[@black-nails]

@@Ali_Aktbabwa aw, that's so sweet of them. Glad you are feeling accepted and appreciated ❤️ Gives me hope for myself too

[@kiddynamite5074]

Love ❤️

[@dededaniel1987]

This is so honest and so true. Thanks Jade. Keep spreading those positive vibes

[@unfolding_pblo]

"I just like to live my life constantly experiencing my own decisions" a beautiful version of freedom 🌈

[@bryte0627]

Damn! Ok universe sending Jade as reinforcements. You make it sound so easy...this work is hard. Worth it, but hard

[@MrsBombastik]

Yieah esp if you are sexual af

[@MsMizz1]

“They be on me. Clank clank. I’m fully committed.” 😂 I can’t get past 3 mins without the giggles. Prime Jade humor this upload. Love to see. Love the salmon/coral vibes the hoodies given and the cozy homey vibe.

[@zucchinigreen]

Even though I'm older than you, this was right on time. I recently got feedback from work that I'm difficult to work with and I started to feel a-how, BUT I realized 2 things: These people are not and never will be my tribe They mad cause I hold them accountable and that has nothing to do with me. After a lot of reflection and adjusting my approach, I learned to be more empathetic but also learned to stop caring. As you put it best, "These people won't be at my funeral and neither will I" lol. So, I have to stand by my choice and my ideas and my ethics knowing that in a better organization that would be rewarded. Here's to doing me and bending the world to fit me and not vice versa. 🔥

[@tengutheterrible8491]

Thank you for this video! I've been in therapy on and off for over a decade, consistently going with a great therapist the last 3 years, and I've recently realized that I have very little idea who I am. I was taught as a kid that my responsibility was to make the people around me happy, so I spent my whole life reflecting what I thought others wanted instead of learning about myself. I've loved your videos immensely since finding you, especially the glow up videos. But those vids also always made me lowkey sad bc I still feel so far away from finding myself the way the amazing people featured in those videos seemed to. But this video is very reassuring that I'm on the right track doing the work I'm doing every day to get to know myself, and as always I just need to give myself a lot of love and a lot of patience and I'll get to my destination eventually. Much love to you and this wonderful community you've fostered.♡

[@bossyboots5000]

Good luck on your journey discovering yourself. It def sounds like you're on the right path

[@ravenwolfkittyface1802]

I think, for me, a component of figuring out my authenticity was realizing I had to get queer community narratives of selfhood out of my head just as much as mainstream ones. That I’ll never fit in a box labeled “butch” or “femme” or “lesbian” or whatever, my story will never be a Butch Self-Actualization narrative or a Femme Self-Discovery Story - or even a typical trans narrative - and that’s fine. I don’t need a script.

[@marou55ia_]

"it's the journey...shoutout to tisha" LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL up and down like a roller coaster

[@spkn_hues]

I am myself. Love me, hate me, or be indiferent, but this is who I am. It took a LONG time for me to get to that point, but I finally did, and it's been so liberating! I'm also a Leo, and we love to be loved, but I had to teach myself that I'm just not for everybody. I'm a weird little Queer poet person that radiates Divine Child energy 24/7. I have duality in so many ways, and I'm honestly a lot to deal with. But for those willing to get to know me, I can be one of the most loyal and caring friends or partners you could ask for. All that to say, accepting myself as who I am, accepting that I may not be accepted, and living my truth has given me a confidence that I never had before. I highly recommend it...

[@simsbanshee]

jacket sponsored by the bisexual community with that double zipper fit 🤣 it goes both ways!

[@BeautifulEarthJa]

🤣

[@kennyjac]

I feel this so much! I had a moment on my 28th birthday this week where I realized I felt so ME and it felt so good. And it was just because I was unapologetically doing what I wanted and wearing what I wanted, and for once not worrying about judgement for it. It felt good, I hope I get more days like that.

[@3sk4h]

“People will always find a reason to hate on somebody”

[@Hsjsjskekdocienskspsbebdvd]

really needed this

[@bridgettewomack7218]

Thank you for posting this. It really struck a chord with me today. I also feel that take a nap vib

[@ostiepok]

omg I love how you go straight to the point without the never ending intros

[@courtneylovett8307]

Oh how I needed this. Next week, I'm hanging out with a girl, who as far as I know has no clue I'm interested in her. She just seems so out of my league, but I know that's my own lack of confidence talking. Thank you Jade for this reminder to just be me and not overthink everything. At the end of the day I just want to have a fun time with her, and maybe kiss her if she's interested. Vibes!

[@louploup]

good luck!

[@coatrack]

Good luck pls give updates!!

[@courtneylovett8307]

@@coatrack It was great! I was straight up with her rather quickly, and surprise surprise, she knew (of course she did). She said if it was a different time and different circumstances, she would say yes, but having just got out of a relationship, she needs to give herself time. Honestly the best let down I've received, and once that weight was lifted off I had the best time with her. She even let me kiss her when the night was over, probably because we both knew it wasn't going anywhere and we wanted to just enjoy the time we had together (I live in east coast and she lives in LA, I was on vacation). We hung out quite often that week with her showing me around, and it was so natural. Felt like I've known her for a while with how close we quickly became. We've been talking occasionally long distance, but no expectations - just enjoying each other's company time to time. I'm completely happy with how things are between us :)

[@coatrack]

@@courtneylovett8307 aahhhhhh that makes me so happy well done for telling her!!

[@belupodadera5052]

Jade im so moved by all these points you made! I just happen to be in a healing journey and trying to figure out who am I. Its so nice to hear your perspective on this cause i feel like youve made it to a point in life where you can pass down deeply moving truths, im 24 and asking myself all of these hard questions in order to actually grow into myself, and your confidence and experience makes me feel so seen and comforted, thank you ur the living proof that leos are the best zodiac sign period

[@allisonthabit7639]

This is the realest advice I’ve heard in awhile, I’m going to keep coming back to this video

[@Neurozumim]

I don't how much I judge myself, but whenever I hear people being very judgy (example, people on tiktok commenting on Madonna dancing in a club last week-end), I usually feel like stepping out and not want to be around such people.

[@katc9198]

This video started out so strong I love it

[@MazMari]

Thank you for attending Jade's Ted Talk 💅🏿🤘🏿✨️

[@alwaysbeeurself]

It's all about insecurity. and those who judge are insecure themselves. People live in fear with who they are, you don't have to. This doesn't mean to not have fear, it just means to not be afraid to be you while at the same time not protecting yourself to be more important than you actually are; when we cross this line we are living in fear and this is what causes all of our problems, to be better somehow or to avoid who we could be.

[@weirdo_with_a_paintbrush]

Damn, this came at the right time. I do tarot and spirit guides have been telling me to shed the public persona and not worry about others, and just "be that bitch!" And then boom! Today Jade put out this❤️ talk about divine timing. We love ya! I support ya!

[@TreZureTraiL]

I just discovered this channel and I love it. Jade you are a gem.

[@constructingadditionalpylo8597]

This is the best video I have seen about how to be ourselves. Thank you Jade ❤

[@glasscoughs1975]

Loved this so much thank you, Jade. I’m going to be coming back to watch this a couple of times more so it can really sink in

[@Hhhhhhhhh186]

I've been on a quest to find more queer spaces this past year and the journey has been great so far. I have my CrossFit buddies and my gay choir pals, and I'm going to start a queer stitch n bitch with some trans friends. This is ✨my year✨ to connect with the community and I'm stoked about that! I may even go to my first queer dance party this year. 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️❤️

[@carolinecagle3266]

Truth!! I love starting a party on the dance floor.

[@sparkusclark6176]

thanks for taking the time to say this.

[@rtcrook3219]

"you don't have to get people to like you" .........ooof

[@egrace1321]

Thank you for this. As I’ve been entering adulthood I’ve been trying to kill the perfectionist image I hold myself to all the time/the constant want of external validation. Videos like this are helpful :)

[@Jessica-ow3uj]

Genuinely excellent advice

[@itsnygeria]

this was so helpful, very to the point but also entertaining as well! i’ve really been doing my best to always show up as authentically as i can. because like you said there’s so much power & attractiveness in discovering who you truly are & proudly walking in that shit. and if someone has a problem with you simply being confident in yourself, it’s honestly probably not you they have a problem with. also learning not to take it personally when people do say things will make your life so much easier. :)

[@PraxedaStein]

Thanks for saying this, I really needed to hear it.

[@skyrhymee]

This is an advanced and evolved Leo chat ✅

[@Once.A.Violet]

Authenticity is the key 🔑 Loved all the tips

[@maryamelhouari9256]

Thank you for this vd it really make me reallize so many things in my life and also it's so important like I love it ❤

[@sheilaramirez4488]

Beautiful words Jade. Thank you for this video. Coming in a time where holding to my truth in front of others and myself is awakening a lot of my ideas around self worth and safety.

[@DZrache]

I've been learning these things finally. Even while it seems so much of my life is so unfair and hard, it's like I can actually SEE all that bullshit, now that I have the power to face it, thanks to connections I've made with people that I allowed myself to be seen and loved by, and dropped the people who can't appreciate who I really am.

[@rachelfarmer0277]

I'll just stay away from people

[@cheesecakelover48]

I agree with most of the points you made except the idea that you cannot change how you feel about something. I believe you absolutely can by making a conscious effort. As we grow, we change and so do our feelings, views and ideas about things. But thank you for the video ! I needed to hear that I should only care what I think in order to gain more self confidence.

[@livnicole9550]

Giiiiiirl!!! I sooo needed this! Thank you for sharing! Love your content as always! 😘🙏🏽

[@samkcatladyaks]

Omg that’s so true about having fun bc when I’m really just out there doing the stuff that makes me so happy, they do come up to me! Then I hit depression and we don’t talk anymore but still, when I’m good and I’m out there having fun, it’s a friendship and people magnet!:) I loved seeing you sing and dance! Seeing others happy makes us happy and we wanna join in:) And coming out as queer & my partner too, & all that goes with that, yes, we have decided we’re not dealing with people or spaces that don’t make us feel safe or celebrated unless we absolutely have to... Queer spaces are so sacred ❤️

[@therealwindshift]

the karaoke song choice… *chefs kiss*

[@neugrowf]

wow, this slaps. thank you for sharin your thoughts on this subject! it resonated fr!

[@dez3051]

Thank you for this

[@gelilamenna]

this hit home for me. as a first yr uni student who is fully acting on what my family wants me to do for a career, it’s been tough rly being myself here.

[@rosie6]

Sorry love 😢hope ur doing better

[@iamchannellingjoy]

Excellent advice, thank you🌞

[@sapiennova]

you better SPEAK ON IT Jade !!!!

[@hopesreel5248]

Incredible. This is a full on sermon and I’m here for every minute if it. It’s easy sometimes to forget who we are and I appreciate good reminder. Get 👏🏿us 👏🏿together Jade ❤

[@bingbongalong]

Thank you, I really needed to hear this

[@Sclafani_art_studio]

We grew up around the same mindset I think

[@working19977]

I knew there was something that drew me to continue to watch your videos!

[@pfb74]

100% facing myself changed my view on my life which changed my feelings about life which also changed myself

[@Life1233_]

“Existing how you want to” was so profound for me.

[@Peaceloveandjeep]

Thank you soooo much for making this video. I’m a creative. But as I’ve gotten older became a parent etc I’ve lost myself a bit. You lit that 🔥

[@Butterflymoonie]

Wow On the journey to find out how to be myself, you’re video was so helpful

[@anastasiamagazzino4999]

Thank you this really helped me

[@BoitumeloLucy]

Being yourself , it's all about you❤❤

[@tierawilliams619]

This came right on time.

[@mayabrook1153]

Thank you Jade. Such a good video filled with down to earth advice. I completely agree, when you have fun it naturally attracts people. And knowing someone has fallen for or wants to be around you when you've only been 100% yourself is so incredibly powerful. Unlike anything else for confidence boosting, I think.

[@AusiKamo]

“Rosa! Bring it to the front.” Took me out 🤣😭thanks for the video ♥️right on time.

[@Bloom_hannie]

Thank you Queen I needed this I randomly searched how to be yourself saw this and fell in love with your personality, welcome to my world I hope I'm welcomed to yours I'm subscribed and sticking you bet❤

[@cattc6946]

This video was really helpful. Thanks Jade!

[@Sclafani_art_studio]

Thanks for your reallness

[@KatieStAmand]

While we’re on this topic, I’d love to hear more about why you are quitting your 9 to 5 and what you learned about yourself through that process! Like how do you know when somethings not for you and you should walk away?

[@destrim7]

“Bring it to the front… ROSA!” 🤣🤣🤣 took me out. Solid advice in this Jade! ✨👌🏾🤌🏾

[@gxldenjoy]

Thank you I’m really trying to be myself and it’s been hard but I’ll try your tips!

[@rosie6]

Bae it’s hard for me too😢dw we are in this together

[@anticapitalisthomedesign]

Needed this today ✨ thank you!

[@jeweledcookies9680]

Love it! I hope that nap did what it needed to do!! I just bought a hill fox sweatshirt and I’m excited to wear it with patterned cargo pants…as soon as I find some lol. I was very inspired by the pants you wore in that one supertime ❤

[@peaceandlovewillhealtheworld]

Such an awesome video! Thank you! I actually feel peaceful in myself

[@therealestperiod]

❤needed this

[@58shadesofgray]

"bring it to the front. ROSA. Bring it to the front". one of my favourite Jade jokes after years of watching!!

[@JamMasterJazzy09]

Thank you Jade! ❤ you are amazing!

[@Alyssa-ho5pi]

Bruh this video came at the perfect time 🙏

[@Anouia]

What great tips, gonna make me think and act I hope, really what I needed to hear, thank you Jade!

[@bettyreads222]

Love this advice! I've been really coming to my own this last year even with the difficulties of my chronic illness and stresses of work and family, I'm like I'm that bitch haha and my community got me and it's been a beautiful thing. 😍

[@emilyonizuka4698]

thanks for the pep talk! I find my problem with "being myself" is figuring out who "myself" is. maybe it's my gemini moon having constant identity problems. but I remember this inspirational poster my seventh grade teacher had that said "life isn't about finding yourself. it's about creating yourself" and that one stuck with me. like I just try new things and see what sticks and what doesn't. once I was like I wanna try lolita fashion and put it out there and my friend was like hey I can lend you one of my dresses and we had a little tea party with our other friends who were into it. and ultimately found it wasn't really for me but at least I tried it and know that.

[@damson9470]

U attaching yourself to labels makes u less able to be yourself. Don't think of yourself as a gemini moon, no just think of yourself as you

[@theetravelhippie]

I love this video. Vibrate high and attract your tribe

[@BayAreaBerk]

Hey young lady, this is an Uncle from the fringe of your demographic. Finally got around to subscribing. (don't know why it took me so long...) Love, Peace, & Umoja.

[@SilverPisces98]

Another wonderful video! Such good advice, beautiful said. Thank you!

[@doelala6679]

Omg, you dancing is so cute😂

[@ardenf.3208]

Thank you Jade 💜 by some fun convergence that was really well timed

[@neprobst]

Great video. I’m in a rough spot and can’t seem to change for the better fast enough. 😢 I’m so annoying and uncentered.

[@Kirbothereligious]

Thanks for the advice I watched because when I was near a group a girls I started to change brutally how i act like not joking around with my Friend and all that shit. So the vidéo help me to know that whatever i want to do i should have the most fun of it whatever They think of me is not important as long as i have fun.

[@luh_twixx]

Thank you!

[@slmxoxo]

Really loved the wisdom in this video. thank you jade 🌠