How to Get Over GENDER DISAPPOINTMENT (7 Tips) + My Experience

[@MeganAcuna]

Disclaimer: I am SO grateful for our little boy. I feel so lucky and blessed to be having him and for him to be healthy as far as we know. I also know that girl/boy are social constructs and that this little guy could just as likely be into dance and dolls and princesses as trucks and dinosaurs and we will love him either way! I hope that in uploading this video I can help someone else who is going through the same thing feel a little bit less alone. Please be kind in the comments.

[@destinyhamilton3357]

Thank you for this. Me and my husband are going through this now. I’m pregnant with a girl, but we wanted a boy.

[@MeganAcuna]

Destiny Hamilton I’m so sorry that you’re going through this right now! I promise it gets better, but it’s totally okay to grieve and be sad first 💛

[@bestm8s4ever09]

Thanks you for this video . I feel the same . I’m Nervous every time a friend or family member gets pregnant in case they have. A girl and it knocks me back to being down again 😓 do you feel that ?

[@MeganAcuna]

bestm8s4ever09 Absolutely!!!! I try to remember to just be happy for them but it does tend to bring up a lot of emotions!

[@MeganAcuna]

MsSense It is though! The things we expect a boy to like, say, and do are completely skewed by our cultural perception of masculinity. Same with girls. In reality, nothing about certain colors, activities, interested, etc belong to one gender at all! It’s so silly!

[@WinterFoxes22]

This video and the comments are healing for me. I found out yesterday that I was having a boy and I bawled in the bathroom. It’s comforting to know that this is a normal feeling

[@MeganAcuna]

I wanted to update everybody on this again! Our little boy Rowan Matthew was born almost two weeks ago and GUYS. I am so so in love with him. This feeling seems so far away and long ago now. If you’re going through this I PROMISE when your little one comes it won’t matter to you anymore. Until then just give yourself time and compassion! Your feelings are valid and it’s going to get better.

[@jessicastanbro9586]

I’m watching this after just finding out our baby is a boy. Though I’m very disappointed it wasn’t a girl, as soon as I read the email the name Rowan popped into my head to. Thanks for sharing!

[@tequilabumbum4373]

Im going through a really hard time grieving the little girl that Im not having, your story gives me so much hope, thank you!❤️🙏🏽

[@jaclyncollins182]

I have a Ronan. :) Good name choice......just found out #2 (and our last is a boy)... feeling all of these feelings. Thank you for this video.

[@allikay2812]

I love this because I’m so sick of hearing people say, “you should just be happy baby is healthy”. Drives me up a wall! Of course everyone is happy the baby is healthy, no one asks for an unhealthy baby! People have visions and dreams of what their baby will be. I’m pregnant with my #6. I have 1 living baby at home. My #2 pregnancy was a live birth and she had major birth defects. We stayed in the nicu for 6 months. I’ve lost 4 babies and I still believe in gender disappointment!

[@MeganAcuna]

Alli Kay I’m so sorry for your loss and inspired by your resilience. You’re amazing, mama!

[@manda506]

Thank you for sharing this. I feel like such a monster after having several losses and having gender disappointment

[@andreaseay1060]

My first was a stillborn girl. I wanted a daughter so bad I cried when the Sono tech said our next was a boy. I love him so much now but it was heartbreaking at first

[@courtneycoto1287]

I’m so glad to have found this comment. My husband and I had a stillborn girl last year. We found out last week that we’re having a boy now. I’ve cried every day since finding out. I feel so terrible for these feelings too but your comment brought me some hope. Thank you 💜

[@Mamadoyle]

I had a stillborn 6 years ago and finally after 3 miscarriages I was so hoping for a girl but I've been told today its a boy I cried at the ultrasound and on the way to the car and just can't hide my disappointment..I already have 3 boys

[@tequilabumbum4373]

Im so sorry for all you girls, I hope you are feeling better today 🙏🏽

[@KirstyLillian]

Thank you so much Megan! I’m pregnant with my 3rd baby and found out yesterday that it is indeed my 3rd boy and I was so heartbroken. I’ve wanted a girl like you since I was a little girl and yesterday was an awful day I was devastated and everyone expected me to be over the moon! This video has really helped me 💞

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m so sorry you’re going through that 💛 Your feelings are valid!

[@lalaazlinah7289]

Yes same here... Already have 2 boy... And 1 found out my third pregnancy is a boy... I cried a lot... But still still love him... Just Yeah..gender disappointed is REAL...

[@lvoebags1187]

I am having my 3rd boy. I hoped for a girl and I am disappointed. This is my last baby and csection 💔 I am never going to have baby girl that I dreamed off.

[@dai-yjamonae8671]

I wanted a girl so bad and cried at my gender reveal, because it was a boy. I completely lost interest in my pregnancy once I found out it was a boy. Looking back on it, I feel silly. He's 15 months old now and I love him so much.

[@ashleyyoung1317]

Thank you for sharing. I haven’t felt connected to this baby as I was with my first two girls. And once I found out I was having a boy I really feel disconnected. I bought boys clothes this morning. Hoping when they come in I’ll start to feel a little more positive.

[@olive7821]

@locopug pug she is entitled to her feelings regarding her body and the human being growing inside her. You are the pathetic one for judging her. F off

[@goathead5073]

@@ashleyyoung1317 Give them about 12 years, you may end up with a girl :) your child has yet to decide their gender.

[@missydonald6381]

@@goathead5073 This comment is beyond ignorant just stop…

[@goathead5073]

@@missydonald6381 And how is it ignorant?

[@katypethick578]

Thank you so much for making this. We found out today that it’s a boy and I was 1000% positive it was a girl. I’ve just known I’d have a girl first since before I even met my husband. I’m crushed. And I feel like a monster. And so ungrateful and just like a total failure as a mom and I’m not even out of my first trimester. I know I’ll be head over heels for him by the time he’s here. But I’ve already jumped to what if my second pregnancy is a boy too. I can’t have two boys. I don’t want two boys. And that makes me feel worse about myself. So thank you for making me feel not alone and a little less terrible about my feelings.

[@humzanafees9348]

Mother and daughter relationships most of the times are good but another and son relationships are like the kind of relationships that last forever! There is no way it’s unbreakable. I’ve experienced this with my own two boys. I’ve always wanted a girl but I no longer have desires for a girl. Trust me you will be happy

[@alvinash3328]

I totally feel you .. i really wanted a girl especially for my first child .. then i ended up with my boy .. when he was born the disappointment went away and i was thankful now im having baby #2 in my first trimester and just found out im having another boy! Trying to slowly accept this .. i know ill be grateful in the end but it is tough and im pretty sure this is the last time ill try to conceive .. even though im not gonna hear the end of it with people asking me to have a girl as if ita in my control!

[@humzanafees9348]

@@alvinash3328 trust me you will love your boys and love them even more in the future. Boys will constantly think about you everyday

[@TheCrispyCo]

The bond between a mother and son is truly special - I excited for you to experience it 💙

[@MeganAcuna]

Thank you! I’m so so excited!

[@ambarhuete2073]

I cant believe people really thumbs down this video!! How?? I appreciate this video soo much!. Nobody talks about this. I feel like I can’t even talk to my friends or family about it!. Thank you for this amazing video

[@MeganAcuna]

ambar huete So glad you found it helpful! It’s a tough thing to walk through and there’s so much shame around it but you’ll get through it, I promise!!!

[@AmandaDeWald]

Love that you talked about this. So much mom shaming around this topic and it’s so common and NORMAL. I just filmed a similar video recently bc I just found out that I am having my THIRD boy. The pain of not getting that daughter is real and us mamas need to talk about it so we don’t feel alone and feel like bad moms. It’s OK to feel all the feels and still love our little boys unconditionally.

[@iveyverzaubert]

Thank you for talking about gender disappointment and being so honest about how it made you feel. I'm 20 weeks and found out today that I'm having a boy. Like you, I always pictured having a girl. I have cried A LOT, and I feel so guilty for feeling this way. I know the feeling will pass soon so I'm trying not to beat myself up about it. I also don't love boy names. I swear I've gone through about 3 or 4 different books and haven't found one that I like. The fact that I have to figure out a boy name also made me cry. We had picked out a girl name by week 4, but oh well, lol.

[@cassidykieu2325]

We lost a daughter in May 2018 and I found out I was pregnant again in July 2018. I had been so set on a little girl that when we found out we were having a boy I was pretty devastated. He is the most amazing, beautiful incredible child and I never would've pictured being so in love with him! Of course I'm still hopeful to have a girl one day but man, the bond of a mother and son are pretty amazing.

[@MeganAcuna]

I'm so so excited to experience that! Thank you so much for sharing your story with me.

[@mimmacatalini8139]

Wow thank you so much for this video. I truly felt so alone. I forever saw myself as a girl mom, and we too are expecting our first child, a sweet boy. I cried for days, feeling guilty and ungrateful. Just a total shift in perspective. Thanks for bringing this into the spotlight. So much love!

[@amandaraujo37]

Thank you for sharing this! People just automatically assume you don’t love your child etc etc it’s not that at all! I wish more people spoke on the topic. So many emotions and society sometimes makes it so you feel you can’t talk about it sadly.

[@MeganAcuna]

alwaysAMANDA Totally!!! I hope more people are able to open up about it! No one is alone 💛

[@JadeSummers89]

I'm 29 weeks pregnant with a little girl, I knew I was having a girl from day one I could feel it. I'm in the uk so we dont have blood tests to detect gender but we found out at 20 weeks pregnant that she was in fact a little girl and oh my gosh my partner was soooooo devastated, he turned grumpy and snappy for like 2 weeks straight because he wanted a boy so bad. I guess it affects men aswel as the women 😊 hes ok now and excited which is great 💖

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m so glad he’s feeling better now! Time really does help so much!

[@cuttlefishrabbit]

Men always want a little boy, they dream of having a little version of themselves.

[@Vlodkkdksp]

@@cuttlefishrabbit yep i sure do. I wanna raise a little athlete

[@Lolee56]

@@cuttlefishrabbit my husband would have been happy with either gender as long as they play soccer and enroll in martial arts classes, luckily we got a boy! But he would have don’t let the same things with a girl

[@SilentJacob]

@@FS02012 wtf? Look at the comments. There are alot fo women saying they where sad they got a boy. And when a man is sad he gets a girl its a future women opressor???? Am i Just not getting it or?

[@laneagranitzki2626]

Thank you for sharing this video. I really needed it tonight as I am sitting on the couch crying. ’m so afraid I won’t love my boy because I am still so in love with my girl that I always envisioned and thought I was carrying. You helped me feel not alone.

[@melodyph95]

I wanted a boy and was the same way I was extremely crushed and im still working through my emotions. Thank you for the tips.💜

[@jhart1127]

@@samantha3493 No she's not. She's allowed to have an opinion.

[@sleepystuff1516]

@@samantha3493 nah girl she is right , it is pathetic

[@Lolee56]

@@taylorstreet3154 for ur husbands sake? What does her husband have to do with it? Some of us just prefer baby boys if we can pick but in the end both genders are blessings and u don’t really have a choice in what u have. Sounds like ur having problems with ur husband.... this is an odd comment to make

[@katypethick578]

@@taylorstreet3154 I’m beyond happy for you that you’ve never had to experience this. But it’s a very real thing. And we already feel guilty for feeling it. Trust me when I say it’s the worst feeling in the world to not be excited. And it takes a lot to even say it out loud. And just because you’re sad doesn’t mean you’re going to love your child any less. So being rude isn’t helpful. And you’re never going to say anything to us that we aren’t already beating ourselves up over. If you don’t have anything nice to say just don’t say anything at all.

[@Aurora-gt5lo]

@@taylorstreet3154 you’re clearly very ignorant, women have many different reasons for having a preference. Some women prefer a certain gender because of past sexual abuse. That was my case I was afraid to have a girl due to the abuse I and women in my family experienced.

[@Fireandfunsocks]

Thank you for sharing this ❤️ I’ve been crying ever since my ultrasound today and I feel so guilty. 😭 Your video helped.

[@Fireandfunsocks]

@@imababy7112 obviously not.

[@NataliaAndrea]

Thank you for making this video! Not many people talk about this! I felt guilty in being disappointed, and crying over this, I felt like I had no one to talk to. It’s nice to watch a video about it

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m SO glad it was helpful! Give yourself time and love 💛

[@Etf8]

I’m so glad you posted this, Megan. I love your honesty and openness.

[@MeganAcuna]

Thank you so much! That means a lot to me!

[@rollercoaster8619]

I always wanted a boy because i dont want my kid to go through the same route as mine. I have been living a miserable life as a girl, i have been an overthinking introvert with low self esteem trying to be good, nice, obedient for my whole life. Theres not a single thing that i could do without thinking for others before myself. Im afraid of raising a girl to be the same person as her mother. Now im pregnant with a baby girl and i feel really sorry for her already

[@GamingZoneKids-1]

That's exactly my situation, I'm such a people pleaser pimp due to my low self esteem n that's why i didn't want a girl but my ultrasound showed it to be one, n now I'm finding ways to cope with that.

[@Kris723]

Thank you so much for being the hero that we needed! I was devastated when I found out I was having a boy and then I was devastated because I was devastated and like you, I didn’t feel like I was allowed to be. In that moment, you feel so alone because this is the side that no one talks about. Everyone says that you should just be happy to have a healthy baby not understanding that two things can exist at the same time. Thank you again ❤

[@luimary6203]

Thank you for the video. I'm 22 weeks pregnant and last week we found out we would be having a baby boy. I already have a little girl. But I was a little bit crushed because the whole time I was picturing a second girl and booth of them playing together. I know she will play with her little brother just as well. But in my head it was a girl. And know I need to accept that and find the joy again

[@sharonkondo]

Knowing that I’m not alone, just makes it a little better

[@MeganAcuna]

It’s normal. I’m sorry you’re experiencing it right now. 💛

[@flaviapereira4587]

I’m happy someone had the Guts to make a video like this. I’m really the opposite of you, always pictured having a boy and he would be my baby boy and I’d be the only Queen in the house. Just found out yesterday I’m having a girl and im sad and couldn’t be even sleep all night “picturing me being a girls mom” something i never pictured I hope this tips help me because I’m SAD!

[@richardcaliandro4336]

It's very important to be honest with your emotions because guilt over them keeps us from exploring them and working through them. I'm very glad you are working through them and that you are showing a lot of other people that it isn't unusual to feel these emotions, as well. God bless you, Megan.

[@MeganAcuna]

That’s totally true! Feeling like you “shouldn’t feel this way” keeps you from processing and working through it!

[@caseface131]

This is exactly how I feel! I just found out yesterday and feel disappointed. Thank you for your video

[@ItsbabyJD]

Thank you for sharing ❤️ I needed to hear this I was so sure my baby was a girl and turns out he’s a boy. And as bad as it sounds I’m experiencing the worst part of gender disappointment because I found out today, hopefully in a few days when I see my baby next week I will feel better and start adjusting mentally

[@mariafernandabarron8525]

Same here, hope that feeling to go away soon

[@dorenaholinga8051]

I'm here today

[@shanoevo3548]

Thank you so much for posting this video! It is incredibly helpful and comforting to be reassured that these feelings are normal and okay to allow yourself to experience. 🥰

[@kjhayward]

Thank you so much for being so open and honest! You shouldn't feel guilty about telling the truth about your feelings. You will soon find out that the gender really doesn't matter once they place that baby in your arms! I'm a mom of 4 beautiful children. 3 girls and the caboose is a boy. After having 3 girls I wasn't sure how I would do with a boy BUT let me tell you...the bond between a mom and a son is LIKE NO OTHER!!! I love all my children equally, but there is a special bond between a mom and son. He is my heart with legs!!! Congratulations on YOUR journey of becoming a MOM!! You are going to be GREAT!

[@MeganAcuna]

Kelly Hayward Thank you so much!!! This really means a lot to me!

[@beoncabee7428]

Found out an hour ago that we are “Team Blue” and I am completely devastated. Can’t help but crying over never having a girl as we only want one child. It’s tearing my heart in two. But I’m so glad I found your video. Thank u for your honesty. It made me feel a little better to know I’m not the only one going through this. Hopefully my disappointment will turn into excitement real soon.

[@del-marmare1646]

I can relate. Never imagined it would be this difficult. The sense of loss is so real.

[@goathead5073]

You might still have a girl though, give them a few years. You don't decide your child's gender, your child does.

[@Maria-qy5mw]

Having two kids won’t be so bad

[@Diabola_Innocens]

he might give you a granddaughter one day... 😉

[@sakura2648]

This is the exact same thing I'm going through right now, only wanted one child and it was always a little girl, but I'm also team blue so I'm trying to cope through the depression and tears

[@Stephyrodolfo]

I am so glad you and other moms are talking about this. When I found out my second baby was a boy, something felt off... I felt... disappointed... and so SO GUILTY for feeling disappointment. I imagined myself having three girls and I knew we had said we’d only have two, so that was already hard. I never had a sister and I always wanted my children to experience that, to have all girls, very close in age while I was in my 20’s. It took me a few days, and the way I see it is I “grieved” That life that I had pictured in my mind. I made my peace with it and I was excited to have my little boy! Now, he is 4yo and THE SWEETEST, funniest, most loving thing to his mamma ❤️ Funny thing is, unexpectedly and without trying, we had FIVE more children; two boys and three girls! My last five babies were born within a year (our triplets will be three in August and our twins will be two in June). You never know what life has prepared for you. ❤️

[@johntracy72]

A set of twins and a set of triplets. That's awesome.

[@sofimonte6689]

I’m really grateful for this video, because everything you spoke about was something I experienced myself I too had envisioned myself with a baby girl and found out I was having a boy at 12 weeks. I’m not due until December and I’ve made peace with having a boy and began shopping for him as well, and it’s helped. The nursery was a big help as well. I’ve watched your birth vlog like 100x cause it’s so beautiful and peaceful its really has helped me get an idea of what’s to come in December. I also mourned my marriage changing and youth (we’re 25 my husband and I) so I know where you were coming from. Thank you for videos!

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m so glad I could be helpful! It sounds like we have a lot in common! You’re going to love your baby boy so much!

[@missandiguerrero9938]

My husband and I just had our gender reveal party a few hours ago surrounded by our family and friends and we’re having a boy. Deep in my heart I really wanted a girl. I always wanted a daughter. I tried to hide my anger and sadness from everyone but as the party was over I couldn’t help but to breakdown in my room. I feel bad and guilty for feeling this way. I was already planning my daughter’s appointment to get her ears pierced, our mommy daughter dates, getting our nails done, planning her quinceañera and having that bond I didn’t have with my mom. It’s an ugly and sad feeling and I feel very bad about crying and feeling this way.

[@Sevitrey]

How do you feel today?

[@Katyerina]

Any updates?

[@jazzoboe827]

I had a lot of these same feelings in my first pregnancy. My husband and I has always kind of joked that we just felt like we were destined to have girls. We didn't do any big gender reveal, but when I got my NIPT results over the phone and they me it was a boy, I kind of felt in shock. I hadn't had any strong feelings about the gender since becoming pregnant, and I obviously knew it was a 50/50 shot, but hearing it was a boy just kind of felt...wrong. I wasn't so much upset or disappointed as just a bit disconnected. It didn't quite feel real. But I definitely felt guilty that I wasn't excited. But over time, as we started planning the nursery, buying things, dreaming about how things would be once he arrived, those feelings eased off and I got more and more excited to meet our son. As I began to feel his movements more, he became a real person to me, and by the time he was born, there was no question that he could ever have been someone else. He's 18 months old now, and of course I adore being his mama! Now I'm pregnant with baby #2, and I'll admit I was nervous finding out the gender this time, most of all because I know this will likely be our last baby. I was so afraid that if it was another boy, I'd be crushed by the idea of never having a daughter. I spent a lot of time thinking about it and trying to get my mind to a place of peace. In fact, when I got my NIPT results online, I stopped and said a prayer before opening them that I could accept and feel joy over whatever the result was. I didn't want my mind to be left catching up this time. Honestly, when I saw "female," I think I felt as much if not more shock than last time. I had to go back and keep reading it to make sure I wasn't crazy and seeing things. I think part of me felt like I was terrible for having any preference in my mind, or that I wanted it too much somehow, that it would keep it from happening. I'm 18 weeks now and part of me is still holding my breath for the anatomy scan to confirm everything. But the funny thing is, even though I got what I "wanted," I'm finding it isn't so simple either. There's still part of me that feels bad my son won't have a brother to bond with. And there's still a disconnect, where I feel like I don't "know" this baby yet. I'm not feeling a lot of movement yet, and I'm so used to connecting "baby" with "boy" that I find myself mentally slipping and saying he instead of she. We even have a name picked out (90% sure) but I don't find myself calling her by that name yet. I think, either way it goes, it just takes time to accept your reality and connect with this tiny little person you don't even know yet. Give yourself patience and grace. You know you will love your child unconditionally, no matter who or what they turn out to be -- however similar or different to the reality we pictured in advance, in a million ways besides just gender. And the more you get to know them, the more that love will grow deeper and stronger.

[@MeganAcuna]

Kirra Fedyszyn YES!!!! Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It is such a complicated thing to go through and there are so many emotions. I totally felt that same way when I found out. It just felt “wrong.” Like that wasn’t what was supposed to happen. But the more time that passes and the more we plan (and especially just finally starting to feel him move this week) those feelings of grief and sadness have gone away and I’m so excited now! I think it really is just about giving yourself time and grace, like you said. 💛

[@kenyawheaten2157]

@jazzoboe827. What did you had for the second one?

[@jazzoboe827]

@@kenyawheaten2157 My second was a girl! She's 3.5 years old now ❤️

[@maddymooo]

I wish my mother tried to get over her gender disappointment. She's seemed to hate my guts my whole life because I'm not a boy. She never had her boy to carry on our father's name. She had my sister. Fortunately, she's not harsh about my sister's gender. I'm eighteen and I can tell she doesn't love me. I'm glad most expecting mothers do not stay disappointed. All of you are great mothers for not holding onto the disappointment. 💗

[@MeganAcuna]

This breaks my heart. I am so, SO sorry. I hope you find your chosen family that will love you the way you deserve!

[@maddymooo]

@@MeganAcuna You're very sweet. I'm trying. 💗

[@saketadarsh7606]

@@maddymooo Hope you won't hate your child if its a boy ❤...

[@sovereignlife4901]

Why do people want boys so much? It seems like a betrayal to the female gender. Does she despise herself for being a woman because of childhood trauma she has about how people treated her for being female?

[@elizabethluke8697]

@@sovereignlife4901 exactly!

[@mael2039]

everyone always says that as long as the baby is healthy, they don't care about the gender, and I always felt like a horrible person and like I was already a horrible mother before the baby was even born, and I tried to pretend like I wasn't feeling what I was feeling. I'd always wanted a girl, I always wanted a daughter, I never had a boy favourite character, favourite toy, favourite celebrity, I only ever liked girl names.. I always pictured my baby being a girl. And I'm grateful and happy and I love my baby boy, but I was disappointed when I found out, and I think I made it a lot harder for myself because of how guilty I felt. I really hated myself for this, and I think that's why it's so so so important that people talk about this. Because you're not a bad mum (or dad) for having a preference. It's okay to wish for one gender and it's okay to be disappointed. You will get over it. That being said, my grandparents always wanted a girl and they had four boys and then they adopted a little girl and they couldn't have been happier with any of their children.

[@jessicakatz9278]

I am due with my first, a boy in a few days. Ever since I found out the gender I’ve had the hardest time. Not because he’s a boy, but for the loss of the daughter I feel like I had. I always envisioned my life with a little girl and as a girl mom. I knew this baby was a girl and then all of a sudden we shot the colored cannons and they were blue. This is all about the loss of a dream. It’s a real, true issue.

[@jaidenw.5013]

yes!!

[@misslucyfelix]

This was beautiful, thank you so much for sharing! I remember we had our gender reveal and I cried through happiness and utter sadness when it was a boy, I just knew it was going to be a boy, and even though I thought I'd prepared myself I was still so hoping to see a big cloud of pink smoke when the cannon went off, and when it was blue my heart sank, it took me a good few days to come round to the idea but now I can't imagine him being anything else and now I'm due, I wouldn't change him for a girl, I'm so glad he's a boy and most importantly he's mine 💙🥰

[@MeganAcuna]

I feel the same way now! I’m obsessed with our little boy!

[@misslucyfelix]

@@MeganAcuna here's hoping for girls the second time around! 🤗🥰

[@mariaschnee4953]

I am from Germany, my English is not the Best. In germany, nobody talk about this... Thanks for your video. I found out today that it will be a boy. I'm so sad about it and I still don't know how to cope with it. It feels like I couldn't love the child. It wasn't a planned pregnancy, the circumstances spoke against the child. Still, I decided to fight, no matter how dark it looks. A week ago the doctor said from the ultrasound image that she is going to be a girl, I was so happy, I thought that was the reward for all of that what I endure and take on for the baby. Today I got the result of the blood test and found out it's a boy. It's like someone killed my little girl that I had for a week. It hurts so much. First to hear that it is a girl and to be happy to then learn that it was all just an illusion.

[@danashann6272]

Just found out I’m having a boy and feeling the same way you did. Thanks for posting this💙

[@meeesa83]

Thank you so much for your video. It’s brave because there are definitely a lot of judgmental people out there that don’t understand. But it’s so comforting and helpful for me, as I just found out after 3 years of trying that I am having a boy. All I have ever imagined since I was a child was having a little girl. I can’t stop crying and am completely overwhelmed with emotion- sadness, grief and also guilt for feeling this way. I appreciate you being so candid and for all your helpful tips. I hope in the coming days I will be able to move forward to start looking at clothes and thinking of a nursery.

[@cm-ft8wd]

When you read the part about ‘the stranger’ in your pregnancy journal. That’s exactly how I feel right now. I had this idea of a little girl 👧 in my head and now it’s like this stranger I don’t know. I spent 21 weeks thinking I was having a girl. Heartbroken 💔 but grateful. Thank you for sharing your journey. I pray for a healthy birth and healthy son 💙I love him I just don’t know him yet xxx

[@tiiaabiiaa]

thank you so much for sharing this. i haven't found out the gender of my baby yet, but i have been nervous for it to be a boy, and if it is, i don't want to be sad or disappointed if i can help it. i want to prepare myself either way.

[@sclerodermasmarter2742]

Oh a boy's love for his mother is amazing! Congrats Megan. I grew up with our great grandfather Acuna. He was so loving and fun. He lived behind us in a 1 bedroom duplex that still had furniture from the 1940's . He would give me his old cigar box with a Hershey bar in it. You are an amazing strong woman who is blessed to carry a son that will keep our family name going so thank you! You will love having a boy. My son is 18 and will still crawl up next to me so I can scratch his head while we have a heart to heart talk.

[@MeganAcuna]

Scleroderma Smarter I’m only an Acuna by marriage but that’s still so cool!

[@sclerodermasmarter2742]

@@MeganAcuna no cousin. Names, blood , walls ! As long all we share something, we're family! My grandmother Mary Acuna was a beautiful strong woman.I never met her but I've heard stories. You are family and you carry our future as a family in you. You are loved and that baby will be loved!

[@AdriannaGunn]

I am not pregnant or even near being in that stage of life yet but I have so much respect for you for this video. The amount of courage it takes to 1) Take care of yourself and get yourself the help you need to overcome this 2) Use what you learned to help others and 3) Know with this topic there are going to be mean, judgmental people and yet still post it for the good of others, is amazing. You are going to be such an amazing mama and I’m sure so many women appreciate you for this! Can’t wait to see you and your little one grow! 💓

[@MeganAcuna]

Thank you so so much! That really means a lot to me!!! 💛

[@AdrianaChrite]

I have an 8 year old son and identical twin boys on the way. I desperately wanted girls. I absolutely cried my eyes out

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m so sorry you’re going through that

[@bloodymaria2949]

I’m 15 weeks pregnant with my 3rd girl. I would love to have a boy. But I feel like I will never have a little boy

[@emmalatorre363]

Omg! Thank you so much for this video. I really want a boy and I feel like I'm being judge for that. I don't mind a girl but I'm sure I'm gonna be disappointed and start crying if it is. A lot of people tell me that it shouldn't matter and I'm overreacting and I feel bad about it. This video help me a lot and made me realize that I'm not the only one and it's normal to feel that way😊❤️ Love you by the way 🙂

[@vanessalopez3591]

Thank you soo much for sharing. There is a lot of stigma around this topic bc ppl assume that you’re ungrateful or wont love your baby. You can be sad/disappointment but still be grateful. Our feelings are valid. I know not everyone will understand. Like you, I felt like I knew I was having a girl. And I feel like I am meant to also be a girl mom (maybe not this time but sometime later) so I was devastated when I found out I was having a boy. I thought I prepared for this possibility and I was surprised with how hard I took it. I have a step son so I already feel like a boy mom. On my fiancé’s side of the family, there are a lot of little boys. And on my side, we had a mix but they’re are all big now. Its been tough bc I find it hard to bond with boys bc we’re so different. At least thats how it it with my stepson, even if we both love eachother. I was really craving a mother daughter relationship as well. And its sort of like a loss to me that Im still grieving. Of course I love this baby. I prayed for this baby. Maybe next time, if we decide to try again. This pregnancy has be traumatic for me so far so and Ive also been depressed because of it. Maybe once Im out of this fog, I will see it differently. Thank you for being brave enough to share 💖

[@fhalalanimotaung4493]

I'm going through the same, I just recently found out that I'm going to have another baby boy. I cried uncontrollably, I never thought it would affect me like this

[@JAH-iu3yh]

Thanks for this! I’m 23 weeks with my 2nd. My husband did a super cute gender reveal this weekend. My daughter is 4, perfectly healthy, sweet, and now excited for a little sister💝 Inside I am still hoping for a baby boy though!😩 like you said in the beginning, I def feel guilty, esp bc one of my BFFs is going thru pregnancy loss. Trying to get over the disappointment of not using the “perfect” name we had picked out, not having one of each, not going to have another chance... ugh! I’m sure I’ll love her when she’s here.😌

[@claudettesayson167]

I just had a gender reveal and it is a girl. I know i am gonna love her still but my husband and i really hoped for a boy. I wanted a boy because i always wanted a baby brother (i am an only child) and my husband also wanted a baby brother too. Without any person saying it in a platform such as this video, i feel like he and i would be silenced by people telling us how blessed, lucky and grateful we should be to have this healthy baby. But i guess when you have had a gender preference and the scans tell you otherwise it is almost like a dream that you have to wake up too soon. We are keeping ourselves mum about it knowing that people will judge us but true enough, gender disappointment is real and that coping and healing from it to have an amazing relationship with your kid is also real and available. Thank u very much for sharing.

[@Jjmsl]

I am with you! I am pregnant with my second and I found out it is a girl. I have a boy already so you would think I would be so happy to have one of each but I NEVER wanted a girl. I don’t want the Barbie’s, frilly sparkly clothes, doing her hair and then later in life having to deal with makeups, periods, mean girls and boyfriends. I just dread all of it. I am crushed. I wanted to just be a boy mom.

[@Katyerina]

​​​@@Jjmsl Well mama, if this can help you at all, I have a teenage son and a teenage daughter and she has always been chill since she was a newborn, let's say I'm not that feminine either and I was also scared of all this, but in the end she's not as demanding as everyone expects a daughter to be, To be honest, my son brings me more problems at school and she never brings me problems, she is very calm

[@andresramirez94]

Ugh, I’m having my first child and I’m a first time father. I was REALLY hoping for a boy. 💙😭 but found out we’re having a girl 🩷 ! I hope I can at least get ONE boy when we decide to have more children!

[@Matt_Acuna]

@@andresramirez94it’s going to be okay. I was super scared to have a girl too but she is just as protective of her older brother as he is. Maybe more so!

[@alishalovesu]

OHH I JUST went threw the same thing like three days ago 🙃 I literally had the same experience as you. All my friends have had girls and I just always thought of having a girl too. When I found out I was literally crushed and didn’t believe it and looked up how accurate the blood test is. But I thought about it and have been doing better. 😊

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m so glad you’re feeling better! It’s such a tough thing to go through but the other side is so much better! Thinking of you 💛

[@alishalovesu]

Megan Acuna thanks you! I think watching videos like this one helped me get through it quicker than I thought I would 🖤 I really relates to yours the most, and am excited and not down now! Yay 👏🏻 haha

[@frankiebee2980]

I love so much how this video is not for the people that will judge this emotion - because they are there. This video is for people that have the negative feelings, period. You can help your feelings - but what an incredible video that helps you overcome them!

[@idroppedmyiphoneoffapier4133]

My aunt has five girls, she’s always hoped that with each pregnancy that it would be a boy. She’s done having kids now and she’s happy to have the girls she does. Before hearing her experiences and yours I always worried about the problems that would come with each gender, but now I’m just hoping for a healthy baby.

[@DarkworldofScarlet]

I really relate to this and I needed to hear this. I am 27 weeks it took me til just a few weeks ago to know for sure what the gender was. And the reason for that is I had to change obgyn's because I had switched my insurance over so I didn't know for 6 months what the gender was! At the beginning when I found out I was so happy about being pregnant. I kept it a secret for 4 months at work because I wasn't ready to tell friends or family yet I wanted to make sure everything was going well but when I finally told people they were already making their guesses and they asked me what I wanted all his family knew I was going to have a boy because that's all his family has but my family thought it was going to be a girl because the first child with the women in my family have is a girl. Me and my husband wanted a girl so bad but it ended up being a boy and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. And it doesn't help that people are still trying to guess the gender because my gender reveal is not until this Saturday. The thought of me never having a girl really sucks considering that all of his family are mainly boys. I'm trying so hard to be happy about having a boy but it's been really hard thinking I may never have a girl. Thank you for these tips and I will work on them. Please wish me luck 😊

[@jesswhite7347]

I’m glad you posted this! I immediately just assumed it was a girl and this is my second pregnancy you’d think I know better by now! I just couldn’t help it. I only picked girl names, I picked all girl gender geared items for my registry. I envisioned my daughter having a sister. I was used to being a girl mom so I just wanted another one. I know that sounds selfish to people who may have always wanted a girl and who doesn’t already have one. I don’t know these feelings are so confusing. I will love my son but woah I did not expect to see it say I’ll have a boy. I don’t know how to be a boy mom. I try to remember I didn’t know how to be a girl mom and I did that. Im just sad and feel guilty for feeling this way.

[@skaiqyk.9752]

Megan, your videos are amazing, loving your honesty and the fact that you came out with such a sensitive subject as gender disappointment..I met many women with gender disappointment and they blamed themselves for the feeling..I struggled with me getting pregnant for 5 years but still understand the disappointment..I wanted a boy and I got him,but my friend prayed for a girl and she is expecting a boy too..But after some time she got over it and now maybe even more happy with boy then me :) so I believe that it takes some time to "settle" and accept the fact..

[@MeganAcuna]

Absolutely! I love my son more than anything but it took some time to get used to the idea of having a boy!

[@magdaciwis5920]

So good to watch when you are in the same position as you were. Well said also when you mentioned, I know I am going to be judged. I am feeling very much the same, lot of folks from my surrounding probably think that I am not good in the head after crying over the news of having a baby girl, not boy. And yes, watching and reading other women's, like yours videos and articles helps... I know it is going to be fine.

[@samanthamiller5495]

Im pregnant with a girl and I wish so badly I was having a boy. I dont like any girls in my life and now I am adding to the equation. I picture someone to fight with for the rest of my life. Also someone who is going to take my husband's attention away from me. I am trying to get use to the fact that I wont be his whole world anymore and someone else is going to be. I cry a lot about it and I have a hard time picking out a name because I hate the idea of having a girl. It makes my stomach hurt and I am absolutely not excited about this pregnancy. I know I sound crazy, I feel bad about how I feel. I wish I can change. I'm hoping I will feel different when baby is out. Thank you for posting, I don't feel so alone anymore. I am very scared to talk to people about my feelings on this subject.

[@zeeeefineass1930]

You see her as competition... which a lot of moms deal with it’s sad but reality

[@vickierobbins2485]

Im so glad I found this video.. I have 2 sons already and today I had my 20 week scan for our 3rd baby... I found out today im having my 3rd BOY.. I was so desperate for a girl.. I cried in the toilets after my scan.. my partner kind of understands and ive asked him to not make me feel guilty or worse for feing sad.. I am so happy im having a baby boy BUT I am gutted and grieving that girl I will never have.. we have decided this is our last baby and no more after this.. so I will forever be a boy mum.. I love his name and my oldest son really wanted a boy so I just know that he will be SO HAPPY!! I only found out a few hours ago and feel on the verge of tears when I think about it.. ive started adding things to my amazon wishlist for boys so thats helping .. but this video was nice to hear xxxx

[@Diabola_Innocens]

it's not over yet! one of your sons might give you a granddaughter one day. 😉

[@julienicmhathuna4226]

Thank you for making this. You’re very brave to speak about this to help others.

[@briebry6225]

I don't have kids yet but I am going to be trying for it this year. This video opened my eyes to some of my own feelings about wanting a little boy or two before having a girl. So thank you for being brave enough to put this out there and being able to help people in so many different ways.

[@MeganAcuna]

I'm so so glad it was helpful! I'm so excited for you guys! Good luck!!!

[@e.sangeethapandy5159]

It happen to everyone and it's nice to be knowing that I am not alone in this journey

[@gabrielaaguilar777]

Thank you for being so candid about this, I found out two days ago that I'm having another boy and I felt so guilty for feeling, like you said ungrateful, I love my new baby, but I'm only having two kids so having a second boy crushed my dream of having a baby girl because I know I won't get pregnant again.

[@emiliaessentials]

I've been struggling with depression and gender disappointment for two years now. Despite loving my son dearly, I yearned for a daughter. At 44, with my husband not wanting more children, I'm finding it challenging to cope and move forward. My heart and mind are still adjusting to this unexpected path.Honestly, I'm struggling to accept our family dynamics. Two years ago, I welcomed another precious son, but my heart longed for a daughter. I had saved some of my barbies and dolls and princess books.Loving him unconditionally, yet grieving the loss of that daughter dream. Now, at 44, with my husband complete, I'm grappling to find closure.

[@camilaej5476]

I needed to hear this ❤ thank you so much for your video

[@tyannaleew]

OMG i looked up this topic bc i experienced it yesterday and wow it's Megan! I've been watching your videos for a while even before i was pregnant !! It's like hearing it from a big sister. Thank you so much for this, so glad you're the first one to pop up lol

[@dakotamau4198]

This is exactly how I felt..so glad to know I'm not alone. Thanks for sharing what you went through.

[@blancaguts]

So brave for you to talk about this. I rolled my eyes when I read the title, but your disclaimer helped me hear you out. Your feelings are valid, but I’m really glad you explained your POV and acknowledged people who have fertility problems and that gender is a social construct.

[@MeganAcuna]

B G It’s a big, multi-faceted issue, but I’m hoping that this video will make women going through this feel a little bit less alone. Thanks for giving this video a chance even though it didn’t seem like your thing at first!

[@andresramirez94]

I wanted a boy so bad. 😢 my first child and the older brother to protect. Found out it’s a baby girl! I’m happy but I hope I can get at least ONE boy! 😩

[@meganstorey6393]

Thank you so much for making this video. I grew up in a house full of women and I always wanted my home to feel the same. I already have a son who I love to bits but when I just found out my second is also a boy I cried my eyes out. I felt like I should have at least one girl, but I guess it’s just the way it was meant to be. I won’t be having anymore so I think this is why I was so sad.

[@sparklingcupcakeps]

sooo glad you made this video , it’s the first one i’ve seen on yt … this is a real topic that A LOT of women face . thank you for your honesty 🤍🍼🙏🏾 i really want a boy and my gender reveal is July 24th 2021 sooo i’m watching this now just to be prepared and learn how to control my emotions around friends and family for the big reveal in case i don’t get what i hoped for .

[@JimBrownski]

Props for being open about the natural human reaction to dissapointment. You are just saying aloud what many a parent felt when they found out they weren't having the boy/girl they hoped. If you see a family with 3 or more of the same gender - 100% guarantee Baby 3 and beyond is because of their dissapointment with the 1st two. TRUE FACTS.

[@yeshalloween]

I want to thank you for sharing. I understand. I met my husband later in life and didn’t start having babies till my mid-30’s. Just found out yesterday I’m having my 3rd boy. I feel so guilty for being depressed about it. I’m truly sad. I’m just mourning the daughter I’ll never have. I’m too old to keep trying, this baby is my last. I will love him with my whole heart. It’s just hard letting go of the daughter I dreamed of.

[@brigettecallahan5324]

Thank you for talking about this! I found out tonight I am expecting a baby girl. I feel shocked, and yes disappointed. I have a big brother and I always imagined I would have a boy first; I feel like this is not how it’s “supposed to be”. I know I will love her so much and I had to fight hard to make her; it does feel like she is a stranger right now but when she’s here I know I’ll look back on this and be shocked I felt this way

[@naorivas]

This video is how I found your channel. It was immensely helpful. Thank you.

[@rachmaniaauditya9111]

thank you for making this. There are many emotions that come with the preparation and arrival of a little one, and I'm not alone :')

[@MeganAcuna]

You are so welcome! You are not alone at all 💛

[@Lara-tm5nz]

You are so brave for speaking about this sensitive topic! Congrats on your baby boy :-)

[@warrzone370]

I have two small boys and I wouldn’t trade it for thing. My boys are great, they keep me active and learning about new things that I would have had no interest in otherwise. When we were expecting our second, my husband was beyond disappointed he wanted a princess (still does). I saw him struggle and comes to term with having two boys and it was an emotional roller coaster. This is a two sided issue, it probably doesn’t help that modern media does a lot of boy bashing. You will be a great mom.

[@MeganAcuna]

Emotional rollercoaster is a great way to describe it!

[@fhalalanimotaung4493]

Can you please help me, I cried today after finding out that I'm expecting a boy again. I'm no longer happy

[@BecomingTia]

I'm nowhere near this position as I'm unmarried, but I can empathize with you somehow. I don't see many videos like this, but I could imagine wanting a girl first, and then a boy after, but this could be due to wanting a sense of control in my life, rather than allowing God to control things. This boy could be the biggest blessing for you in the most unique way and you don't even know it. Oh, and remember, back in the days, especially with Royalty, it is considered a sign of wealth and longterm prosperity for your first child to be a boy.

[@MeganAcuna]

BecomingTia You are totally right! He is the biggest blessing and I’m so excited to meet him NEXT MONTH! Time has flown by so fast!

[@benharper1506]

Thank you. I found out my babies sex today and its not what I was picturing. or wasn't what I connected with. I am processing and needed to listen to this!

[@Matt_Acuna]

Hey Ben! How’s it going? I’d love to check in with you after six months!

[@homebodywitherinn3003]

Thank you for this video 🙏🏼 I’m going through this right now and appreciate your wisdom and experience 💕

[@pawsation7719]

Having my scan in a week and im doing everything to help me cope that day.

[@Katyerina]

Updates

[@NorthernLights749]

Thank you for sharing! I'm not pregnant but if I found out I were having a boy I would probably react similarly to you. Thank you for normalizing these emotions ❤

[@MeganAcuna]

It's definitely an adjustment! It's so good that you're aware of your preference so that you can manage your expectations too! Thank you for watching 💛

[@melbrown6058]

I experienced this with my son. I had been calling my belly Aylin for WEEKS. When they told me I was having a boy, I didn't believe them. I disconnected. Even at 30 weeks, I made them check again. After he was born we struggled go bond a tiny bit, but now I couldn't actually picture myself as a girl mum!

[@MeganAcuna]

Yes! We were calling my belly Ponyo in the beginning because Matt said the baby looked like a weird fish-human hybrid 😂 What’s your little guy’s name? Aylin is so pretty and unique for a girl!

[@melbrown6058]

@@MeganAcuna awh! I love the name Aylin still, Aylin Olivia Faith would've been her name! My son is called Zaiden James! His name means "Little fire that follows". The James comes from my first baby that I lost, who I named Jaime Allory as I didn't know the sex but have a very strong feeling that was also a boy!

[@MeganAcuna]

@@melbrown6058 Wow, that is so beautiful and meaningful! I'm so terrified of picking the "wrong" name for our little one but I think if you go with something that means something to you, you can't go wrong!

[@bryonnajones]

Thank you so much for posting this video as I am super miserable right now

[@tiffyjacobs7172]

I had the same issue, only mine lasted my entire pregnancy. It wasn’t until right before my baby was born via c section that I was happy. Once he was born everything negative I was feeling suddenly went away and I was instantly happy! He is now 4 months old and I love him so much I can’t even describe it. Hopefully number 2 will be a girl but if not I’m totally ok with another boy. I felt the exact same way as a little girl. I loved playing with dolls and doing all things girly. Now as an adult I wanted a little girl bff sidekick to do all that stuff with, plus I grew up with all girl cousins and babysat all girls as a teenager. Not on purpose. My dad’s friends just happened to all have girls, but none of that even matters now. Thank you for sharing your story! This video was alot of what I was feeling and it’s nice to not feel alone. I wish I could’ve taken a video on him but I couldn’t get one. They didn’t allow recording but I got plenty of photos.

[@anon.9805]

Thank you for this video!! Those small things matter.

[@kalikobiko]

I immediately began to judge this video because 1) I can’t relate to gender disappointment and 2) I have many friends struggling with infertility. But once I began to watch, I realized that what you felt shouldn’t be invalidated by other women’s struggles because they’re in such different leagues. Your struggle is real too and should be acknowledged. Thank you for sharing and for being so honest!!! I love your content and watching you even more now. Also as a boy mom, I can testify that it is so 👏🏽 much 👏🏽 fun 👏🏽 You’re gonna be such a great mom (correction: you’re already such a great one) and you’ll be just fine once he comes along 😊

[@MeganAcuna]

Kiki Saifoloi Thank you so much for giving the video a chance and for taking time out of your day to leave this lovely comment!

[@emilialoniewska9803]

Thank you so much for this video. We’ve just find out yesterday that we are having a boy and I am devastated. I am feeling heartbroken and insanely disappointed. I can’t picture myself with a boy… My pregnancy had been very difficult- I was diagnosed with severe morning sickness and I basically wasn’t able to leave the house for last 10 weeks. So I’ve already decided it’s gonna be my only child as I don’t want to suffer anymore. Which made me feel even more resentful about having a boy. I am glad I am not alone with it. I am feeling ashamed that I am so unhappy- the baby is healthy and that’s what should matter but I can’t help how I am feeling…

[@vanessalopez3591]

I feel this way too! Im in the thick of actually. I was superrr sick too and omg its been traumatic. I was also bed ridden. Im better now but constantly paranoid and going through some depression. Idk if I will try again for another baby. I can’t picture myself as a boy mom either, and I have a stepson that I love very much! Its ok to feel what you feel, take your time. Im doing this as well. Im sorry your pregnancy has been so hard, I hear you mama. We can do this and I hope you are doing better 💖

[@emilialoniewska9803]

@@vanessalopez3591 thank you so much for all your kind words and support! It’s nice to be understood in what I am going through… 18 weeks and still sick ALL THE TIME! I am really sorry you also have such a bad experience I hope you will find some help into therapy or whichever way you choose to fight your depression 🤍

[@nishahaymond6711]

I hope you and your son are doing well!

[@emilialoniewska9803]

@@nishahaymond6711 yes! We are great and I am totally in love with him! It has been a journey but once I’ve seen his cute face the love was overpowering! I still want to have a girl in the future but I don’t wish for him to be a girl anymore and I enjoy being a boy mom !

[@fashionforwardable]

Thank you, I needed to hear this

[@mackenzilowery3660]

I felt like this twice i had 2 boys and was very disappointed...but my 3rd pregnancy just felt diffrent and i kept having hot flashes..my body was overall different and i was having a girl ! She was born may 20 2019 im still really happy i always wanted a daughter!!

[@MegCasson]

Thank you for posting this. I just found out I’m having a girl, I’ve never pictured myself being a girl Mum. I’m a tomboy and I grew up with boys and just get along with boys better. I know I’ll love her and I’m grateful she is looking healthy so far. It’s just not what I pictured. I’ll try these tips.

[@MeganAcuna]

I hope they help! 💛

[@kholaha3055]

I am going through depression because of the exact same reason! I just cannot connect to the baby anymore.. I am crying since I got the news it’s a girl.. I have distanced myself from everyone... and I’m in bed all day.. crying. It feels like someone took away my dreams, my heart, my soul my prayers, my life like everything is gone. And I cannot control my feelings I cannot speak to someone about this as no one will understand this. I don’t feel like going out, do baby shopping or eat.. I’m just there... I hope everything goes well for you and you’re fine and you’ll start loving the baby soon.

[@MegCasson]

@@kholaha3055 I am sorry you're going through that. I was feeling very sad when I first found out as well. Now that we have chosen a name, bought some clothes and some time has gone by I have definitely warmed up to the idea of having a girl. The bad feeling will pass Mama

[@sumrakhan2558]

@@MegCasson I just found out I’m having a girl even though I’ve been dreaming of having a boy. I feel sad but also extremely guilty. I hope these feelings will go away soon

[@SunnyStar-ik8ld]

Just found out that my second baby is a boy, I have a son already and really wanted a girl. I cried at my gender reveal and am still in a dark place, thank you for this. It’s helping

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m so sorry you’re going through that. Your feelings are valid!

[@taniajackson7563]

Aimee Ray same :(

[@elizabethkennedy4427]

This is me too. I thought having the reveal (we were surprised too) I wouldn’t be able to be upset if it was a boy bc people around us would be excited. I cried. Literally as soon as I turned the Facebook live off I cried as I held my son and I felt so bad, like I didn’t love him enough to want another boy. But I just wanted a girl so badly, I knew I did but not the extent that I do until those balloons came out NOT PINK. We want four kids, and our plan was always to foster or adopt and now I’m worried we won’t be able to adopt quickly and I will have to wait a very long time to have another chance at a little girl. And what if we don’t get placed with or picked for a girl? It’s just hard.

[@rebekahsalazar3995]

Guilty... I found out a few days ago that I am having another boy. 99% of friends and family guessed this second baby was going to be a girl. My first is a boy and he also wanted a sister. I am still in shock and was not immediately ecstatic about having another boy. I am worried about telling my family that this is not a girl, like I am disappointing everyone. Going to Target right after was not a good idea either. Because seeing all the cute girl things made me feel even worse. It doesn't make sense to buy more boy things because we have our first's entire wardrobe...Another concern is that when I found out I was pregnant, my fiance decided he wanted this to be the last one. I am still trying to stomach that idea because I always wanted 3 kids and now I am sad thinking I'll never get my daughter. :(

[@ariik8993]

yup, i just found out yesterday that im having a girl and I HATE IT. i have a 3 year old son that i am just HEAD OVER HEELS with, my son is my twin and i am obsessed with him. i always wanted boys . when the tech told me its a girl i broke down. i do not see myself as a girl mom, i dont want to buy girl things, i hate everything girl !!! the darkest thoughts are going thru my head now. i think this is all my fault because from the day i found out i was pregnant i told myself it was a boy and my husband kept saying "i only produce boys, it will be a boy " blah blah blah.... HUGE disappointment when i found out. I planned for this to be my last pregnancy and enjoy every moment of it. i absolutely hate my pregnancy now . i hope something changes fast because this feeling sucks !!!!!!

[@naebonnie]

I wanted a girl too. I was a little disappointed about having a boy. Only because I don’t want to do with a boy especially if the fathers not going to be around. I had this picture in my head of tea parties and Barbie dolls. But hey truck and blocks it is. But when I seen my baby on a sonogram and swear my son waved at me it made my heart smile.

[@audreyderkatch9197]

I subscribed to you because of this video! Thankyou for posting your experience! I had gender disappointment in the beginning too, it was hard especially when I really thought that my baby was a girl. (couldnt explain it just felt it), but Im 38 weeks pregnant now with my baby boy and so excited to meet him! Your words perfectly summed up what I felt when I found out those many weeks ago..guilt, shame, disconnect. It only lasted a few weeks but it was so so hard. Thankyou for posting it so others can see this video and be helped by it! AND for also commenting after you had baby boy!

[@MeganAcuna]

I’m SO so glad you found the video validating! That means so much to me 💛

[@rebeccagutsutter1110]

I have a lot of respect for this woman sharing her story and understand that gender disappointment is not synonymous with not loving your child, however when the odds each time are 50/50, can we really be that disappointed? I mean there was just as much chance as it being the sex you want as it is the undesired sex. For me disappointment means having the odds in your favour and being certain of a sure thing and then having it go wrong. Just my opinion though.

[@MeganAcuna]

It’s really not about logic. Knowing odds are one thing, but the gut reaction you have when you find out one way or the other is something entirely different. A lot of women struggle with this and I’m really thankful if I am able to help them understand and work through their feelings to be the best moms they can be.

[@alvinash3328]

Thank you for sharing this! I extremely rlly wanted a girl and only girl .. it was so bad that i literally said to myself that i wanted only a girl or no baby .. or at least wanted a girl first so i can enjoy the undivided attention. I also took years to conceive and all i wanted was a baby .. its a mixed feeling howver when he arrived like u said i was blown away by the awesomeness now fastforward to now 3 years later and took me a while again to conceive my second i am now gonna be 34 years old and honestly was my last hope for a girl .. even though this time i was praying more for any sibling for my son (even tho for some reason he wants a sister .. i think its just my thoughts beinng relayed to him and he doesnt know what he wants cuz hes only 3) will today i found out at 12 weeks due to blood test that this baby is a boy .. now ill have 2 boys! Im trying to give myself grace .. i am pretty sure im never going to try to conceive on purpose again because my journey was long and i went through gestational diabetes twice .. i will be thankful for what i have been given .. and kind of mourning the loss of the girl best friend that i will no longer have however my story couldve been so different easily couldve ended up with zero children .. so i am grateful

[@mimouchkittabenyoussef5892]

Having a baby is a bless i know and people struggle to have it and am one of those but what you felt and feel is real and no one has right the blame you.been picturing myself my baby girl my whole life and now no clue what i will have so bit stressful 😊