How To Stop Being The Nice Guy! (Nice Guy vs. Good Guy EXPLAINED!) | Apollonia Ponti

[@tccreactions2066]

Bro be yourself love will find u, u don’t have to change your personality for them that selfish as hell, These modern day women are selfish they feel that the man should change and they can stay the same. It should be 50/50 not no 90/10. If she don’t like u for who u are somebody will. Know your value king ‼️.

[@Juli-n-David]

💯💯‼️‼️‼️ solid words here

[@TomFox1]

too many people ain’t being themselves…. that’s the majority of the problem.

[@kc270352]

@@TomFox1 what does "be yourself" actually mean though, it really is a stupid saying lmao 🤨🙄

[@Introvertedalpha]

💯🙌

[@TomFox1]

@@kc270352 Stupid saying? it means expressing yourself by acting the way you are. Not letting social media influence tell you what you can be… You can’t fake shyt.

[@ModernDatingMastery]

*Dropping the nice guy persona doesn’t mean being rude - it’s about setting boundaries and valuing your own time and interests. Confidence is attractive, and respecting yourself makes others respect you too!*

[@justinbrockwell8396]

Thank you for another great vid Apollonia. I made the change years ago after lots of learning, from being the nice guy... always trying too hard etc... to being 100% comfortable in my skin and owning who I am. I don't care who likes me or not, I know where I'm going in life. Join me or don't, simple. We all have our stories, never be ashamed of your past, it made you who you are today. One life, live it!

[@ApolloniaPonti]

You're always welcome, Justin! I love to hear that you're owning who you are!

[@Introvertedalpha]

Loved hearing your story! 🤩

[@kskslslslsoooao]

But are women more attracted to you now?

[@Zuxiro]

I seek so many approvals and no results were changed

[@Rodeo-iz7cg]

For all the nice guys out there I highly recommend reading No More Mr Nice Guy by Robert Glover. I personally was a nice guy back in the day and reading this book helped me overcome that. Being a Nice Guy has A LOT more to do about how you were raised and this book goes over how to recognize where the issues arised and how overcome a lot of what drives us to act in the gross Nice Guy way.

[@MrGchiasson]

A great book for every man.

[@terrancemcclendon456]

Facts ..the church and insecurities are at part

[@dwcushman1]

If I see one more don’t be a nice guy video I’m going to scream. While I have often been told I’m a good guy, I like to think I’m also a nice guy. Regardless, having someone in my life has not been a problem. Those relationships being truly satisfactory over the long-haul is the greater challenge.

[@Anti-HyperLink]

Anyone who thinks being nice is a bad thing belongs in a fucking mental institution. No wonder this world is going to shit. Lunatics who think like this are allowed to just roam free and harm society!

[@olumide31907]

Exactly. I have never had any problem getting women. And I am a kind guy. I say kind because the word nice has been so demonized. The assumption is being nice means there are no boundaries. Which is an assumption. It seems like a trend to bash nice guys.

[@larrylama1471]

@@olumide31907 Totally agree. And the word "nice" also means "weak" by today's definitions. Such KZbin channels have really ruined today's dating scene with negative advice.

[@mav1877]

Excellent video. I was struggling with this for awhile. I've finally realized what I was doing wrong about five years ago.

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you so much for watching! You're doing great!

[@nocheastral8219]

this is Mind-blowing ...wow! has a man I discovered that nice guy inside of me ...the lack of confidence, self love and boundaries...always wanted to satisfy others necessities. please keep making more content on this subject .thank you .God bless

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you so much for watching and sharing that with me! I'm happy to hear that you like these kinds of subjects!

[@stefanross8129]

...... good stuff, good review of these essential fundamentals Signorina Appolonia!

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you so much for watching!

[@martinyeboah5526]

Practical presentation and great content. One of your best videos & contents til date

[@RaymondMakhafola-gi6qc]

Thanks miss A for changing how I perceive woman.✨ Your light touch has made a difference

[@erniet]

Great video! Apollonia!!! Being yourself is the best thing that can happen to anyone. It’s a different mindset. Being a good guy doesn’t mean being arrogant or aloof but knowing your values and living it with honesty and integrity. Don’t accept crap from any disrespectful and rude women who don’t align with your values. It will never end well. Cheers guys 🤣🤣🤣

[@ApolloniaPonti]

BOOM! :-)

[@oxygon2850]

I feel a woman criticizing a man for hiding his flaws is somewhat hypocritical. 🙄

[@allclassallthetime4739]

I’m a confessed nice guy, at least by my definition; I think it’s a good thing to ask someone how they’re doing, stop and ask if someone is in a situation and needs help, gives to less fortunate. I call my self an unabashed nice guy and I’m not helping only women especially beautiful women. I think being nice and a giver is ok and somehow that seems to some like a bad thing. I’ve accepted the very likely possibility that I won’t find anyone but it’ll never stop me from being good, nice and appreciative of every human being until they prove themselves unworthy but for the most part, I believe I relate very well with most people, all people, not just women to impress them. It’s the best insurance policy in the known universe.

[@olumide31907]

I love this comment. I think the word nice has been so demonized. What she is really talking about is guys who have no boundaries or have unresolved trauma.

[@larrylama1471]

Very good my brother. Stay nice. Let these modern day women have their toxic guys and regret that later. Stay nice.

[@gabrieljordan8015]

The term 'Friendzoned' has been wrongly named in my opinion. If a girl is not interested in you and says 'lets just be friends' it most likely means she actually wants nothing to do with you but is too afraid to tell you out of fear the guy will freak out and/or even start stalking her.

[@rutendochabururuka4405]

Appollonia, I have you and your channel to thank for killing the Simp in me and transforming into a confident man. Great content 👌🏾

[@victorromero7750]

Always trying to show support to your channel cause you and your team deserve it, really needed this

[@ApolloniaPonti]

You're the best!

[@cameronscott5975]

Excellent video! Fantastic comparison!

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you so much for watching!

[@acastro22181]

Apollonia, you speak the truth! To add-True happiness comes from a 60/40. 60men /40 women. Women love it when we take the lead. Happy wife, happy life is a con. Don’t follow it. Take the reigns on your life, men.

[@14moldyhamsandwich]

Hello. Love the channel ! I am curious as to your educational background .

[@samuelmoreno0908]

Thank you Apollonia. Your videos are so helpful and I love how you speak in a very genuine and attractive way. Keep up the good work!

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you so much!

[@juliecapper7637]

as a women struggling with Mr Nice guy, this has been amazing information ❤

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Glad it was helpful!

[@vlajster]

Leave him alone!

[@ROBERTDAVis2271]

Great video 👍🏿

[@zatstone]

The best video you ever recorded ever!! I am both but if face extremly atractive girl I activating Nice Guy syndrom.

[@jamichaelelmore2965]

I’m a nice guy but I just be myself

[@Introvertedalpha]

Being yourself is the best way to be!

[@briansukhu4392]

You don't find friendships, you make friends, thus friendships

[@ShadowNash108]

100% big facts and guys needs to stop seeking validations from girls

[@bearzbarnes]

I agree with everything you said except number 4.. I’m 41yrs old and If we were talking about the class of Men with morals from the 80s and 90s then yes male friendships are a valid point.. I mentor many of the young guys I come in contact with and all respect and value my opinions as a Man because I’m living the right way.. but trying to cultivate a friendship with these guys nowadays will totally distract your spirit and energy they are not built the same and have way too many traumas to sort out themselves.. So just because you choose to stay away from the BS doesn’t mean your isolating yourself.. In my case I just understand how to preserve my energy and I’m not going male friend hunting.. it’s just not that serious

[@Cee_Eff]

Great points, and so true. Unfortunately many women and society have made the good guy/nice guy interchangeable

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Hope we can start unraveling it. It's happening.

[@Introvertedalpha]

Great explanation of seeking approval from others vs accepting yourself. Appreciate your insights!

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you!

[@95thjackfrost]

I'm sorry if this comes across as weird but I like the way you write. Something about it is quite fascinating... And good video btw 😊

[@ricardorivers1739]

Apollonia, I have been watching your videos for awhile but this is my first comment. I absolutely love what you did in this video with the compare and contrast approach. I have been learning over time how to make this transition because nice guys do get taken for granted. Wow, this is an amazing video and thank you for the knowledge you present.

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Oh my goodness! Thank you so much. I'm so happy I saw your comment as this is your first comment. Appreciate you sharing and wishing you all the best. xo-Apollonia

[@thenazoreanway8276]

I live by the code of the Ambassador of peace. I love being the Good Nice Guy, 1. I feed the poor when I can 2. I talk to people about Love and God's plan 3. I don't need alot of money to make me happy 4. I once freely gave to a prostitute and told her, not to have sex with me, because I understand your need. 5. I forgive my friend after he curse me and I blessed him, he felt bad after word and apologized True love do exist but people has to want it happen, . We don't need to be the bad guy to defend are love ones to set down rules for are homes, and to stay healthy and in shape. When I was younger be for I grew more in my walk with God, I beat up a some bad guys, being bad does not make one more stronger or defending, if anyone think so then you are dearly mistaken. The reason why theses women like bad guys because there bad themselfs, in the end love and justice ⚖ will prevail

[@RobbieBlue]

This is really good psychology 👏, you are spot on. Sometimes I've been the nice guy being professional but in general it's better to be the good guy always

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thanks you :-)

[@RobbieBlue]

@Apollonia Ponti You really understand psychology and the abstract impulses that influences what guides us and how we premiere reality. I may need a course just to push my mind in a positive direction

[@TomFox1]

Be a good man

[@Introvertedalpha]

💯

[@MCGreggy28]

Needed to see this today, thank you.

[@theybknowing3343]

I like the outline

[@markfennell1167]

What we are really talking about here are the following: Absolute confidence in yourself. Embracing all aspects of your core soul and main desires. Being absolutely self-assured and confident in who you are and what you want. This is what we are really talking about here. I would then say that the truly nice man the nice guy the good guy can have all of these confident traits. Being a nice person does not automatically mean that you don’t care about yourself. Indeed it is very easy to be kind and loving as well as self-assured and confident

[@stephenbutler1816]

This is on Time for me 🙂

[@Ali-gv1yw]

Its really nice to hear about Gregs success. ❤️😄

[@kc270352]

Apollonia the teacher, class is in session

[@FAUXTV1]

Watching this from Ghana

[@jasonstrickland3920]

Just want to say thank you Apollonia! I found your channel recently and have been watching your videos, they have taught me a lot about myself and what not to do! I just wish I had found your videos before I screwed things up between a good friend of mine I wanted to date. The happening: Things seemed good at first but then she became less present, didn't reply as quick or often, i thought she needed space and tried to give it to her, I myself messed that up, now she has ghosted me. She didn't bother to speak to me about why she backed off, but after watching some of your videos its safe to say she probably isn't good for me if she's doing that. I'll be honest, I would love to try to reconcile but that might be a bad idea.

[@davidp1963]

Hey Apollonia, great tips! I love your electronic board! I want one! What's it called?

[@rorysmith2415]

Good and nice people should win. Evil peoole should lose.

[@Brookie408]

Thank you so much for being such an amazing teacher Apollonia.

[@ApolloniaPonti]

It's my pleasure

[@sophiafake-virus2456]

Stop being a creep dude, didn't you watch the video.

[@erikarellano2323]

I wish I had seen this video about 15 years ago. I see SO much of who Iused to be in this. Glad that's over. Thanks for breaking this down so even a man can get it. :)

[@d.leroy2567]

I had friends they don’t work out cause I was expected to go to them when it’s really a 2 way street

[@beno_4785]

I do have a couple disagreements here and there though a very helpful video, your shrink will not tell you these guys. Thank you Appoloni.

[@s.beccari4678]

Great breakdown

[@Sal.K--BC]

Wow, I'm definitely a nice guy... I had some childhood trauma and was bullied as a kid. I've recently realized I need therapy more than I thought.

[@jaredvaughan1665]

I agree with everything. Yet as an INTP I have learned I am happier alone than having alot of close male friends. I used to be as obsessed with having friends as having a partner. Now I do neither. But I have a job where I am around more people. And family.

[@mikequesada6559]

I'm a good guy not a nice guy, I hate when people think I'm a nice guy!

[@Sami-kn7qg]

I got myself as Good guy . l think the different is basically maturity.

[@amanchildofallah]

I needed this I been a nice guy my whole life hopefully it pays off in the end but I don't seek approval anymore at least or validation only from myself know

[@ShadowNash108]

Wonderful point!! Guys needs to STOP seeking validations from girls!!

[@D-23]

This was a great video. I’m glad I know the difference now. I thought being a good guy was being a nice guy also. I’m definitely a good guy. I’ve been looking at this all wrong haha thank you for the video!

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Yay! I'm so happy I tackled this subject. Woohooo! lol

[@kskslslslsoooao]

What about, if you do have standards, nobody seems to live up to them and you still end up being lonely?

[@iamgeorge9854]

Miss I need your help I need to stop being a nice guy

[@h8rmgnt144]

U gave me a flashback to being in school 😀

[@ApolloniaPonti]

LOL Classroom 2B Mrs.Ponti (Sexual Education & Men Mental Health) hehe

[@h8rmgnt144]

@@ApolloniaPonti prettiest teacher I ever had 🥰🥰 my attendance would be impeccable in ur class mz ponti

[@h8rmgnt144]

@@ApolloniaPonti I'm always open to ur teachings mz ponti 😘😘

[@universeusa]

Apolonia, you are awesome 👏👏👏👏👏😘🙏

[@jncyj]

I was walking into a store there was his pretty girl standing near the front entrance.. I looked at her she looked back at me for 3 seconds. Then she turns her head to the left walks away to the left. I watched her walk away to the beauty counter she worked there. I could not walk over there what could i buy at the beauty counter? Should I have walked over there? Make up I'm buying something for my sister, friend as a birthday gift?? She did not look back at me. Was there interest? She was the 1st to look away. She did have a smerk on her face as she turned her head walk away. No smile as we looked at each other for 3 seconds.

[@meatball6930]

What is it called when a woman has every single trait under the nice guy list? It’s a woman with abandonment issues too or is that because of abandonment?

[@Realmcxwell]

I like your content! But for me the board idea was tiring…

[@jiggyjames9237]

Remember you are always loved bye for now... 🌹

[@amanchildofallah]

Alot of people tell me I'm good guy but I feel like I could be so much better

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Then if you want to get better let's do it! :-)

[@azmike3572]

Even considering using these good points, it's not like so many men are meeting an available woman with relationship possibilities every week. More like every 7 months, if that.

[@Juli-n-David]

Love your new touch tv

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you!!

[@SirJames100]

I love this😇😇😇

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you so much for watching!

[@ztemaxgaming8620]

To be honest the only reason despite adding your videos to watchlist I can never watch them is because they're too long I think you should try trimming them down to 10-12mins so that they become more easier to qatch

[@northeastokwari1889]

It'd be interesting to see you and Thesingleguy do a video

[@yahosephbenyisrael917]

Hey Queen Apollonia

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Hi!

[@gamergeek_2470]

I just started watching you and it’s helping through a lot. But my ex recently messaged me and she said to me “I still miss it but didn’t regret leaving me” so what does that mean. Does that mean it’s slowly getting to her?

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Just means she misses you and still loves you but stands firm in her decision right now. She is confident that she made the right choice. Don't know how long this was for but if you want more advice please book a session since we would need more detail. :-) xoxo

[@gamergeek_2470]

@@ApolloniaPonti well she’s talking to me in a cherish good way but I asked her and she still say’s she loves me and stuff but I asked her will we ever get back together and she said “no comment” like she smiled and giggled to it. People are saying it’s a good thing but I don’t want to get my hopes up because I’ve already been let down multiple times

[@oldleatherhandsfriends4053]

Women tell good guys they are narcissists because they like themselves.

[@cabralm2002]

God bless you!

[@ApolloniaPonti]

You too!

[@adamjumper5818]

Thank you for the videos like I said before I don’t have enough money to pay for the pay courses but these videos really help as someone who was in a wheelchair I really struggled with women because I feel like I was already being prejudged thank you

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Hi Adam, I understand how hard this can be. I'm happy that my videos can help you! Proud of everything you've overcame!

[@truechristianity74]

That don’t make no sense at all Im a nice guy a good guy. Good guys are nice guys. People all people try to hide their flaws lets make it a habit when we meet people to expose our flaws first then go from there.

[@cleveland216..]

If you have a female friend and she lives out of town and you send her money sometimes and you want to come visit and she always have a excuse when it’s time to visit… Is she using me 🤔

[@Dlopez23]

Really bro stop it leave that user alone find someone that will spend money on you work on your purpose and confidence

[@ECO473]

If women want a good man as they claim so much, then...WHY DO THEY THROW THEMSELVES AT THE SCRUFFY BAD BOYS??? Can you answer that question JUST ONCE, AP???

[@TheLaw-1996]

If you want to know the easiest way to know if someone is good or nice tell them no and you will see their true selves unfold

[@kunalkatore6363]

Hey Apollonia! Ive been watching your content on KZbin since long. Your content has guided me a lot and I'm thanking you for that. One more doubt i had. Recently i broke up with my partner who took me for granted and choose to hurt me. I started ignoring her even though she was texting me but she later started reaching out a friend of mine after the 'No Contact' period. She called me and i made her realise how badly i was hurt. She said, she doesn't deserve me as i had done a lot for her and in return she did something really bad to me. She wanted to meet and i was ready for that but later after the conversation she said it will be wrong for me if i met her. She also said she misses me and wont contact me again and also thanked me for everything. Idk what she is trying to do. And also i still want her back but I'm not sure if she is worth it. Should i again go for no contact or do something else? Please guide me🙏. Thanks!

[@qad951]

No move on If the hurt she did was intentional Which what u think Not her And ask her friends Not close one but just causual ones and ask if possible cause most of the time if she is using u , she can probabily will do more

[@KytexEdits]

I swear some of this stuff must be genetic or learned super early through parents. I grew up disabled, bullied, very few friends, am 23 now, by all accounts you'd expect me to be a nice guy, but I just don't act this way, I've just always confident, and it honestly kind of baffles me. The reason I bring up the genetic thing is because my father is exactly the same way - you'll go to a toilette in a store, come out 5 mins later and he's having a deep conversation with a random person. I'm also not saying this in a bragging manner, I'm just so curious about what influences people in the ways they do.

[@anthonyfrisby672]

this is good

[@alexanderanderson9805]

how are you doing today god blessed you shining star stay safe and positive #FEARLESSMODE man or nice are the last to be honest a real relationship 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@smiles7631]

I need to find the courage to ask for a girls number. I'm missing chances and it's really painful. I don't even know what I'm scared of. I've never been able to do this my entire life. I seem to always talk myself out of it everytime. I make an excuse to myself, like she's to young or she's to hot, or she's got a boyfriend. On and on. I have to stop but I don't know how. Does anyone know how to overcome this? I can't be the only one to feel this way.

[@olumide31907]

Can we please rephrase the titles of these videos. It's not being nice that is the problem. Niceness simply means being kind. It is being kind WITHOUT BOUNDARIES that is a problem. But these nice guys are evil videos presume that you cannot be nice/kind and have boundaries. That is just not true. I have never seen a word be redefined in real time like the word "nice" has..

[@larrylama1471]

I totally agree with you. It is definitions that are the problem.

[@aricbalser2647]

my first time

[@Agnet_Faze]

I don't believe in playing hard to get ... It's all bullshit to me ... Life is short if you like someone then just go get them ... Be real and honest with yourself ... I don't even believe in Alpha personality because it's pseudo science ... These are total crap ... i am a honest person and I believe that if someone has to like me they will and even if I meet the wrong person, it's ok because sometimes you meet the wrong people to prepare you for the good one ... You learn from both good and bad people and that is life ... Stop taking people for granted as if they are less important than you ... Stop playing games and playing with their feelings by "playing hard to get" and all these bullshit ... You aren't a child but an adult .... So if someone has to like you, they will but if they don't then you aren't for them .... Be honest and be genuine .... You like someone then go tell them and show them and if they don't like you like that then respect it and move on ... What is this crap that all "love coaches" say that we have to play hard to get blah blah blah? Smh it's not how it works ... Love is something that happens and grows on its own ... Love is not like you grab a remote control and then control the person to make them love you .... Love coaches are liars .... If you wanna spend time to listen to their crap then good luck ... I am out of here .... "You have to be an alpha", "you have to play hard to get", "you have to ghost your partner out when you don't feel okay" .... Your partner is your significant other and they are supposed to be hearing you out and help you get through your issues .... And you do the same when they are upset too .... And not ghosting them out and treat them like a piece of crap or something ... Grow up already and stop treating others like they are less valuable than you! CUT THE CHASE....STOP CHASING! BE YOURSELF AND SHOW HER YOU LIKE HER AND IF SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU THEN MOVE ON...SOMEONE ELSE WILL LIKE YOU....YOU DON'T NEED TO CHASE ANYONE...WHY ARE YOU DEGRADING YOURSELF BY CHASING A WOMAN? DUH DON'T DO THAT...A WOMAN IS NOT A GIRL....A WOMAN IS WISE AND THEY KNOW THAT YOU LIKE THEM... TRUST ME....IF THEY KNOW AND THEY LIKE YOU BACK, THEY WILL GIVE YOU THEIR TIME....CHASING WOMEN ARE FOR BOYS NOT MEN... These coaches make love sounds like it's a competition and you and your partner are both competitors....And we are competing who will win who....lol love is not a competition, not a business nor is it a game....Get that straight in your mind.... If someone likes you they will give you their time and make you the priority....You don't have to chase them and show them your value and how worthy you are... That's the CHEAPEST thing to do....

[@kevusahannahspacefoundatio9457]

To much impossible I stop dating for life

[@stefanross8129]

"denies"

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Thank you.

[@Brookie408]

Beautiful 😍

[@djtdawg87]

Great, great video Apollonia, unfortunately i am the textbook example of a nice guy i've always been this way a beta male loser and it's just the way i am, i'll be 35 this June and i've never had a girlfriend or been in a relationship, i've never ever had any friends even though i've bent over backwards my whole life trying to make everyone happy, i haven't kissed or done anything sexual with a woman since 2011 and i don't think i ever will again, i mean what woman would even want me anyways i just suck 😞

[@BruceJC75]

All I know is that I am not a man that women want. I think it’s innate. Either you have it or you don’t. I clearly do not.

[@NazrulIslam-vz1qe]

What's a lovely year heir and red dress

[@josephcurreri9289]

I think that you are oversimplifying this, I think a lot of your differences between nice guys and good guys a really differences between somebody who is very agreeable and somebody who is very disagreeable. The way I would explain the difference is nice guys a good to their target, good guys are nice to everybody

[@h8rmgnt144]

I like that orange top on u 😍

[@ApolloniaPonti]

Oh well thank you! lol

[@andrewericson919]

This video spoke to me. I was in a five year "relationship" that ended mid 2021. She had cheated on me multiple times with the same woman (yes I know) and possibly others which I haven't confirmed. She begged and pleaded for me back each time and I gave in. We had an argument last year because she lied to me who she took out to lunch (was the same woman she cheated on me with). We ended up in a huge argument and it turned out bad. I finally lost it with built up anger and emotional damage that I did something stupid during that argument. She never gave me a chance to redeem myself for my mistake and she left me a month later and turns out she was talking to another man already right after our heated argument. She left me with shared bills we had and hasn't paid a dime back to me since then and also we share property together and she hasn't helped. Yes I know I'll get backlash for us sharing things together before marriage. My dating life, personal life and work have been in shambles since our breakup has it seems all the red flags in life I'm ignoring are slapping me in the face. This video exposed some of the reasons why this is happening.

[@Real-Name..Maqavoy]

Good thing i'm not a nice guy. And was able too dismiss those values... Early At 23y of Age. ~ Only... I wish more women would understand this. I've both *Book smart* (A+ level mentality for Study) & some *Street Smarts* (Average) - However... That's a topic for another Day. Great vid, once again!

[@cezare1060]

I'm sorry, but it occurs to me that your "good guy" is more of a self-centered man who doesn't respect women. I.e. which may be "good", but a little unusable for society, family or society. Would you like a man who is poor, on drugs, doesn't want children, is selfish or cleverly lies, but at the same time, by your definition, was good?

[@theunknowm16649]

If you’re here you already lost lol