I Got A Fridge Lockbox And It's DESTROYING Our Relationship r/Relationships

[@Russman67]

Story 1: The boyfriend went zero to 100 over not getting to eat all the snacks. And actually got violent over not getting to eat all the snacks. Yeah, they're done.

[@framich2000]

Yeah she should run away from the relationship

[@lynnw7155]

"He didn't give an F" that she paid for half the snacks. It sounds like he doesn't give an F period.

[@dcg590]

Temper tantrum. Let him buy his own snacks, in his own apartment.

[@ronhall5395]

Well we all know this had nothing to do with. The lock box. He felt entitled to all the snacks. Zero remorse for eating all of them. This is a form of abuse. So his true colors showing thru. He wants complete control in this relationship and her opinion does not matter. His saying he was going to propose? What? Like Why would she say yes to such a selfish person. Good job in moving on.

[@catherinerawson3559]

3th story:Ditch this mommy's boy and his mommy too.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Yes it's possible he's on steroids or street drugs, but this behavior would have happened either way. His passive behavior was controlling. He was putting OP in her place by ignoring her requests and boundaries. He thought he'd trained her. When she got the lock box he had to result to other tactics to put her in her place. The passive didn't work anymore so he resulted to aggressive. This is a super common cycle and no one should excuse it with he's on something.

[@lespena3722]

Or maybe he is like those people who has that deep down…. But when the steroids come to play if unlocks the darkside.

[@1911odisea]

People greatly overestimate the effects of roid rage.

[@stephanien6237]

“It was disrespectful and controlling for you to be able to eat your own food”. Yeah-this guy is not mentally well. HE is the one who is disrespectful and controlling. Whether or not he is on steroids, this behavior is not acceptable.

[@EM3SonSon]

Gaslighting, first. Raging, second. Emotional blackmail or love bombing, third. Clear pattern of a abuser here.

[@TheIronwil]

Well said. I don't think it's drugs. I think this is a lunatic that was asserting control, as you described. The snacks were just the start.

[@jenniferlacey6974]

I almost cried when OP wondered if she was to blame or overreacting in story two. He’s really torn her down.

[@Callimo]

Yeah, that whole spiel about her (ex) bf being so considerate besides eating all of her snacks really made me think that she was probably letting him run all over her boundaries just to please him and this was the first time she did *any* sort of pushback.

[@isthataspider7410]

My "observation" is that he's a shallow prick

[@Callimo]

@@moon-moth1 Oh ok, my mistake

[@D-Dollie]

I know right. It was awful to hear. I could never live with someone who would constantly comment of my body. I had a baby a year and a half ago. My body is not the same but I can still fit into most of clothes. My husband NEVER commented on my body. He likes my body just the same as before. She needs to leave this a-hole for her own mental health!!!

[@stirrednotshaken4823]

This is why my marriage went down the toilet! He was always making jabs at me for my weight, then got my kids doing it too. After time my love died for that man and I couldn’t stand being around him. It wouldn’t matter if he tried doing something nice cause he had already killed my love!

[@Russman67]

Story 2: You got to love how the husbands completely tone deaf that his "observations" aren't well received but OP needs counseling. This is abusive

[@stirrednotshaken4823]

Yep, been there, done that! Maybe she should start nitpicking his appearance…see if he can get self conscious 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@srkh8966]

Story 2: NTA, but OP should apologise to her in-laws

[@karimygirl5826]

Oh the husband knows he's chipping away at her self esteem.

[@karimygirl5826]

​@@srkh8966her in-laws should apologize to her for somewhat raising that devil man impo

[@emberlynne4963]

Straight abuse! Divorce

[@awkwardbash]

For the dress swap story: I would cancel the engagement. He already proved his mom is more important in his relationships than than his partner. He can marry a blow up doll and his mom can dress it however she wants

[@stephanien6237]

Yeah… he is a disrespectful and controlling partner. Tell him that YOU have a vision for your own wedding and dress, and his mother’s “vision” does not overrule your vision. Do. Not. Marry. Him! This is a clear sign as to how he will act during a marriage, overruling his wife and not respecting her choices and autonomy.

[@Nevertoleave]

I hope she ruins their relationship on her way out the door. Cancel everything she’s paid for and leave anything he has. Then go to them acting like she’s sorry. “I will apologize actually. I’m sorry mother in law. It is a lovely dress and I’m sure you’ll look beautiful in it when you fuck your son in it on your wedding night. Because that’s what you want isn’t it? You need to be the most important woman in his life, which since he’s no longer mommy’s little boy means it’ll be as his wife. Don’t worry, with how attached to your womb he is I’m sure you’ll hear the pitter patter of little feet again in no time.” Make sure you ruin that dress mentally for both of them. Let them think about that image every time they see each other. Burn it to the ground

[@viddergrapho8488]

Bruh that twat better give her money back! OP paid for that dress! And her asshole fiance has the audacity to return something SHE bought and re-spend HER money? Hell naw that's leading right to fisticuffs.

[@zoe9190]

Im guessing his mom started the emotional incest with her son as soon as her husband got sick, maybe even before then

[@Dina-lc4bt]

I totally agree!!! This sounds like a mama’s boy who puts his mom’s needs above his wife’s needs.

[@Tyanna01]

Story 2: "He never says hurtful words..." Uh...yes he does. Yes he absolutely does. Someone embarrassed him at dinner, but it wasn't OP. His comment caused the embarrassment, and how OP handled it made sure everyone knew it had been going on for a while. Too bad he's too dumb to realize that. Honestly, I'm sure OP could make some "observations" about his body too if she really wanted to. Also, I personally wouldn't let someone who has such "observations" ever touch me again. I think the only thing OP should do is apologize to the inlaws for yelling at dinner and give them some context as to why.

[@lindah3803]

Agree,basically. Definitely wouldn't be letting him touch me. As far as MIL and FIL,call and ask to meet. Apologize for exploding during dinner. Then give details of everything he has been saying and how long and often it has been going on. Considering how the family went quiet after his comment,they should be willing to hear OP out. What I'm about to say is only,ONLY if his "observations" are the only thing bad about him and he never had "observations" before or during the pregnancy and delivery. If by chance OP wants to save the marriage,OP and hubby could live separately,starting out,for the separation to not become a divorce,he would have to go to therapy,both individual and couples. If he refuses therapy,Divorce. If he does therapy but plays around with it,Divorce. If he does therapy but can't accept responsibility for the harm he is causing,Divorce. If he takes therapy seriously,realizes his behavior was trash,begins to treat OP with respect and does well making up for his actions,Live together again on a trial basis,continueing with therapy. Once things are settled in and going smoothly for a good period of time,enjoy life with their baby.

[@susankaempfer8427]

I want an update so bad.

[@Tyanna01]

Story 1: It's not about the snacks honestly, they were just showing a behaviour. The behaviour was that he didn't value OP, her things, or her contribution to the house. They are *his* snacks that he bought with *his* money. I seriously wonder if he's given the silent treatment before and it worked. I can't believe that this is the only part in their relationship that was bad. If it really was then I'm guessing this is the only part in their relationship that she put up a boundary.

[@tallyp.7643]

He could keep pushing and pushing and basically make financial abuse complete in a few years. Yeah, they might be splitting bills now, but he's trying to tell her "what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine as long as we're living together" without flat out saying it. And then he destroys her stuff to silence her, but she just left instead. Yeah, he was doing low-tier annoyance/abuse tactics and pushing buttons... just funny that HE is the one that went off into the stratosphere so quick over a rather logical idea.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

All this!

[@επιθετικόακτινιδιο]

I think that they didn't really had any arguments before or OP may had been very passive There is no "this is the first time she/he does that" ...This argument makes break up seems like an unreasonable scenario. It doesn't matter if it is the first, the last time or a minor incident, if someone 's behavior is controlling, abusive or totally irrational

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

His lack of self-control, his excessive pouting, his outbursts, then love-bombing to try to get back to the status quo: more red flags than a communist parade.

[@moebiusjdx7288]

Story 2: I'll bet money the husband is either intentionally or unintentionally justifying current or future cheating.

[@toysruskid5074]

Story 3: Dear husband: "I see how much you want your mom in your marriage and I just can't see enough room for me in this relationship. I'm not into threesomes."

[@candypettynettie487]

Agreed 🤣

[@wessexdruid7598]

Dear ex-husband?

[@toysruskid5074]

@@wessexdruid7598 Husband-never-to-be?

[@wessexdruid7598]

@@toysruskid5074 Let us hope.

[@lindah3803]

@@toysruskid5074 Bingo!

[@Shniedelwoodz]

"Every time you say something like this, it makes me fall out of love with you a little more." - Story 2. Fight fire with fire.

[@LoveableNiki]

Story 2: NTA. It is so damaging to oneself to constantly be negatively spoken about/to, especially by your person. I would have had a conversation initially. The second time, separation. This is a deal breaker. It's one thing when people you don't know or don't care about say these type of things...but to hear them in your home...your safe place? UNACCEPTABLE!

[@samoanjoseph1457]

"Just consider the dress. Just consider MIL's opinion." The fact that MIL was there at all to give her opinion checks both boxes. That is the extent of consideration in my eyes. "I considered it. I went another way." That's all that should need to be said.

[@dcg590]

Genius!!

[@kbf9644]

Oh my god, leaving it locked and empty was such a boss move. I approve! 👍🏻 ETA: His text stream should be turned into info sheets entitled “Lovebombing: What does it look like?”

[@hilaryc3203]

I might have been a bit more petty and left one single snack inside, so that when his efforts to break into the lockbox finally succeeded, he'd find a single item..like one cracker, one potato chip, or one peanut.

[@kbf9644]

@@hilaryc3203 Or a fish. 😏

[@gaxalee7392]

@@hilaryc3203 Or a radish.

[@stephanien6237]

😂😂😂

[@toysruskid5074]

You want it to drive him nuts when he shakes it. Convince him it's got something good in it. 2 chip bags. 1 with something hefty that will get messy if he shakes it violently. Like a couple cheap tubs of yogurt. Tape closed lightly - not enough to prevent mess. Other with something extra crinkly. Like extra empty chip bags. Tape closed thoroughly.

[@karendaniel620]

Story 1: Good on you, IP. Story 2: It's time to reevaluate this marriage. Story 3: Run for the hills, OP.

[@packergeek10]

So insane to me the hill some people will die on when I read these. Like how hard is it to not eat somebody else's food? The rage was hidden but better that it came out now before marriage or children. When the other person has so much invested they can act irrational. Who knows what he would have done. I would honestly consider ignoring him completely.

[@kellywaters643]

not hard, but it's a power move with the ex

[@Digitalfairy]

Probably because he gets his kicks eating anything he wants until his gf called him out on it.

[@Aaron-kj8dv]

Yeah that shit doesn't come out of nowhere. I bet he's always boiling and seething beneath the surface. There's definitely something else going on, I'm sooo curious to know what it is.

[@jenniferhanses7064]

In regards to eating other people's food, it can be a problem. I do far far better on my own and eat less of my own choice. If I'm with someone who stocks snacks, or even if there are leftovers in jeopardy, I'm likely to try to eat more. I'm honestly not quite sure what triggers the issue, and some of it I only noticed when I got to live entirely on my own. It is much easier for me to put food aside for later if I'm not living with someone else. But the thing with that behavior is that I would applaud the lockbox if my self control were such an issue for my partner. Because I've always valued my partners more than food. If that was what it took for my partner to feel secure then that's fine, and may even be healthier for me.

[@MintyBingus]

LITERALLY. I'll admit, I do have an issue with over-snacking, but there's a difference between an impulse control issue and the abusive behavior this guy was exhibiting. Any reasonable person would want to find a solution to the issue.

[@sarahwilson2409]

These stories made me realise what a gem my fella is. I’m going to give him a big hug when he gets back from work later

[@luciferandassociates9255]

Story 1: Look I'm a snack bandit, I pick and steal little treats here and there from Hubby and the kids. But Jesus, I don't eat all of it, I don't eat the last bit of it and I don't their favorite. Then at the end we just buy more. This dude is crazy and I'm glad op is safe.

[@lsmmoore1]

And like, what's with that comment justifying the dude's behavior because he's muscular? I don't care if he's built like Chris Hemsworth as Thor. That still doesn't excuse him taking the entirety of an expensive cheese that any reasonable person would see was a special treat that of course should be shared (like really, if I bought a wedge of Brie only to find one dude ate all of it, I'd be Pi$$ed). And that's before the rage and the blowups and all that.

[@myconfusedmerriment]

I don’t get why he wouldn’t just go buy more of his own snacks?? Tf. It’s not that hard. The fact that he thought she was “abusing him” or “denying him food,” like…bro. If you eat a lot more than your s/o does, just buy extra for yourself or do your own snack runs??

[@kathleenmcfarlane2555]

Story 2: I'd let him know he will lose all access to your body if he says one more thing about your body. OP should really work on leaving him.

[@DanaG1970]

Story 3, I’d be done and calling off the wedding. His mother will spend their entire marriage over stepping boundaries and butting in where she’s not wanted.

[@paulinadeboer3604]

Ik would buy the uglys suit, the one i know would not flatter him. Then i tell him my mother had always vision my groom in this so he needs to wear it. Then he understand why you are angry.

[@MaryTheresa1986]

I agree. OP needs to find a real man and sonny boy needs to marry his mommy.

[@MrJpaynebb]

Ok, so future MIL thinks she has the right to pick out the brides dress. This will not end well for OP. Time to decide to breakup or begin to ignore every red flag that will pop up over the marriage to stay together. 1st it's the dress, then where to live, job, baby's names, etc. He's a mama's boy and has made it crystal clear that his mommy's opinion is more important than OP's.

[@Andrea.S.Alvey12]

Step over boundaries? With a mil like that, within six months of the wedding there won't BE any boundaries! She needs to hand the ring to his mom and tell her she should marry her son, as clearly any woman will always be the other woman.

[@MrBuns-yi2hk]

Yeah, got rid of the original dress and said "it's my wedding too." From the sound of things, it's his mom's wedding, not his.

[@DrownedInExile]

S1: Holy moly, OP's STBXH was a raging lunatic! Such a small pushback against his boundary-stomping sure ripped off his mask fast! I'm so glad OP dumped his crazy arse. Leaving the locked empty lockbox behind was absolute gold!

[@stephanien6237]

Thank goodness he wasn’t subtle-it made it easy for her to drop him like a hot stone before she went any further with him.

[@chamab.6800]

I’m a whole Snackasaurus Rex. I stay foraging for goodies but eating up all the snacks with no regard to other’s feelings? No. As many have said. It wasn’t about the lock box. Dude was on his way to a physical confrontation.

[@TsukiKageTora]

Story 3: you know for a fact once she is married to this guy, OP will never have a say in her life cause MIL will “envision” something for OP, as the wife of her son, and will basically control her life and her son will enable it

[@AndyyWithAY]

Story 1 this sounds minor but it's actually something that should be a deal breaker. You clearly don't love someone if you repeatedly do something completely avoidable when you've been asked not to. You should have been done with him ages ago. Now he's behaving in a manner that's unhinged and abusive. GTFO. That lease ending is a blessing, take it and never look back

[@BersealiaDreamheart]

I agree. OP’s boyfriend-well ex-is abusive and controlling. People like that do it because they’re satisfied with the need to oppress and hurt a partner because that sense of control gives them self-esteem and makes them feel happy and proud. This cycle of abuse, apologizing, and reconciliation is basically like a sick form of a comfort blanket to the abuser. But the moment they loose that sense of control, they start to panic because they’re losing that “comfort blanket” they’re addicted to. They’ll try to do everything to get it back, from begging to pleading to false promises to even death threats. Or worse.

[@lynnw7155]

OP is lucky she got out alive.

[@gaxalee7392]

I’m underweight because I struggle to get energy/ability to eat which is coupled with taste and texture issues that give me anxiety about new foods. Needless to say, I’ve never tolerated my food being stolen(it’s caused arguments with family) and never will.

[@j.j.juggernaut9709]

idk it really depends on how OP is with the food. My mother for example wants to buy snacks and always have them in the house. I mean ALWAYS until the end of time lol. I keep telling her that I will eat snacks I bought (with my money btw) and she should hurry up if she wants to get the taste because I don't skip a day usually. She does not eat them and will remember they exist like months after I bought them, when they are already gone so she literally has a breakdown about me not leaving her any. Like woman, the box was right there, opened, nothing stopped you from taking some for yourself. Legit she once bought a box of chocolates and opened them over a year later only to find out that they have gone bad (and now neither of us got to eat them good job) 🤣🤣 Some people are just weird when it comes to keeping food

[@ruthbeamish8849]

Andyawe13. I have found myself very frequently agreeing with your wise comments

[@CatsOverBrats]

It's not about a vision. It's about controlling her future daughter in law. If she gives in on this, this will keep happening. She's better off without that family. Run, girl. Run fast and run far.

[@maddy8328]

Story 2, verbally abusing him? Lmao that's rich, considering he's been verbally abusing you for MONTHS.

[@amandarose4469]

“It’s his wedding to.” He can wear the wedding dress then, I make him wear the wedding dress.

[@frankhooper7871]

Story 3 - tell him if his mother's choice of wedding dress is that important, then he can wear it.

[@dandotvid]

Story 2: Those "observations" OP's husband gave were definitely *not* indirect. They were extremely direct. Story 3: OP *did* consider the dress her FMIL picked. She considered it, and decided not to pick it.

[@enjolireyes643]

Story 1- OP got out of there right on time! I’m blinded by that shiny spine! Story 2- NTA start observing about his lack of bedroom prowess since body comments at not off limits! YES I’m petty!

[@amandasunshine2]

And his receding hairline, his inadequate income, and shrimpy height 👍 Men are weird 🤣

[@justaperson4656]

I approve of the story 2 judgement, but tbf I'm also petty

[@Resilient_Sage88]

Lol I had the same thought. I mean... it's just an observation...right? But seriously you try carrying a whole ass person for nine months and see what kind of shape you're in buddy.

[@Joxman2k]

I disagree with being petty for story 2. That will only increase his games, possibly leading to violence. Take the high road. He will look more the fool, and turn his family against him. The silence means they are on her side and he was out of line. She stood up for herself period. If he continues then that is on him and he will look like the complete asshole that he is to others and they will stick up for her. He is the ass, dont become one too. That only removes any accountability that he has and gives him ammo with his family. Dont stoop. Stand straight. What the hell does being petty accomplish? Ya you get a dig in for a momentary win for your ego, then what? These are real problems that they are dealing with. He was being abusive in a cowardly way. The only way that goes away is to shine the light of truth on it, not game playing like a 7 year old. Grow up.

[@enjolireyes643]

@@Joxman2k I respect your disagreement about being petty but please take it for the social media comment it is and not as solid advice of someone who is involved in OP’s aka a stranger’s life or as a therapist. AKA I am talking crap

[@ArcticWolfGod]

Story 1. I don't think this was because of steroids, or at least just because of them (I could see the raging being because of it though). It seems more than likely to me that he was just an abuser. The marriage spamming is what really sealed the deal for me, it was his last ditch effort to manipulate OP back into the relationship. Also we never got answer to what other possible things OP could have just ignored/didn't realize until now, but I'd almost guarantee a lot more stuff would pop out if OP would think about it for a while.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Story 2 If my future husband ever makes similar comments about my post-partum body, it's going to be a long long long time before he gets up close and personal with my body. Some women take longer to lose weight and it doesn't even matter. It's unacceptable in private and even moreso in public. This reeks of negging. Some women were underweight pre-pregnancy and get a lot of compliments on their fuller bodies. OP may actually look better now and he's trying to put her down, so she doesn't move on to a man who actually deserves her

[@magnarcreed3801]

It can matter. If they gained too much weight it’s not good for them. But usually it should be fine to loose over two years. Though body shape, not weight, can change and never be fixed which is fine.

[@AndyyWithAY]

@@magnarcreed3801 No it doesn't matter. No one, especially a man who will never give birth needs to be making these comments about a woman's post-partum body. He's not concerned about health, he's being cruel

[@Kris-wo4pj]

@@magnarcreed3801 the bmi chart is off and makes people sick. Most people are either obese or have an eating disorder according to that thing. So I doubt it was like she weighed 400 lbs after a baby. Which is actually unhealthy and would have caused issues for the baby as well

[@magnarcreed3801]

@@AndyyWithAY Yes it does matter the health of your partner. Now I agree he was just being a raging dick, but I disagree that weights not important. Now skin, stretch marks, etc are fine and in no way impact her health. But if you’re with somebody and have a child, you owe them being as healthy as possible. Especially the little one.

[@magnarcreed3801]

@@Kris-wo4pj The bmi chart is right for most people unless you’re a body builder. It gives a nice range of healthy. You don’t have to aim for the smallest possible. Even then if bmi “might” not work for you, you can find you actual body fat percentage through measurements.

[@TsukiKageTora]

Story 3: “your effing mother isn’t marrying you”. End scene.

[@juliamiller2299]

For story 1, I'm glad that OP got away from her abusive partner, and I hope she gets the money back for her laptop. For Story 2, the OP should consider her fiancee's actions as a godsend. She should run away from this guy as soon as possible. He is a mama's boy and will always be a mama's boy and no woman wants that.

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

Story 3: Literally one minute in, just tell him to marry his mom. Red flags galore 🚩🚩🚩

[@clairebear-96]

Omg on story 3, I’d be calling off the whole wedding 💀

[@stonefox2546]

If I was a rich person and someone tried to pull this shit on me I'd buy the dress for mommy dearest's "vision"... only to return in on mommy dearest's lawn on a blow-up doll and my ring attached.

[@clairebear-96]

@@stonefox2546 Lmao that made me laugh aloud at the bus stop, I love that 😂

[@GIChiyo]

Story 3: Your whole marriage will be like this if you marry him, run

[@Aaron-kj8dv]

It would be worse because it's harder to just walk out of a marriage like when you're dating

[@owl7072]

Story 2: If you look to your left, then you'll find yet another case of someone wanting to have a baby with their s/o, while simultaneously expecting their s/o to never look like they had a baby, or as we like to call it here in the world of real life: An absolute bumbling idiot And if you look to your right, you'll see the gift shop 💞

[@myconfusedmerriment]

Seriously. Like, her body changed because she literally MADE YOUR CHILD WITH IT. Evidently her waistline is more important than their kid??

[@Mama_Bear_of_3]

Story 1. I'm going to give my first opinion on this before the comments and update. First, no matter what they update, OP is NTA. Second, from what she described about his fitness, working out, and temper about something so stupid. I will not be surprised if it comes out that he is on steroids. I say this because of a reaction my ex had to PB&J sandwiches. So, I dated a guy, and once he got mad at me (yelling and screaming) because when he got back from the gym, and I gave him his 4 PB&J sandwinches, they were jelly side up (yup you read that correctly). He actually demanded I remake them properly with peanut butter side up. He had a smug look on his face when I took the plate from him. However, his mouth dropped open when I took the sandwiches, flipped them over, handed th3m back to h8m, and walked out. That was the last time I ever stepped foot in his house. He called me several times and left messages. But, I just ignored him and went on with my life. I found out a few weeks later that he was on serious amounts of steroids. Now, and for the last 29 years, my husband and I joke around that PB&J jelly side up brought us together ( we met 2 weeks after I left the meat head), and to this day whenevere I make PB&J, I always serve them Jelly side up. Lol

[@jenniferhanses7064]

Story 1: NTA. If I were the hypothetical BF with the self control problem (because I love chocolate more than I should), I'd be feeling bad about it, and be glad my GF had solved the problem by getting the lock box. A little ashamed that I couldn't hold out on my own, but happy that it's not an issue any longer. So what I find insulting is basically his demand that you continue to fund his lack of snacking control. It seems rather controlling of him, you know, to force you to pay tribute to him.

[@gordybrown3667]

First story wasn't an aita post

[@ponykazy3725]

I eat a lot of my friends snacks. I feel bad, and I should stop myself. Ig i dont buy those things, (to me it's like "splurging" and I'm stingy) and I probably dont eat enough. My friend is really nice about it, and I apologize a lot. He also learned there are snaks I wont eat (cheetos and other "styrofoam puff balls) so he buys thoes lol

[@krisg4815162342]

it's not a self control problem. he *needs the extra calories. it's a theft problem.

[@carolsh1983]

There goes your monetization? Well you were absolutely correct. This doesn’t make up for it and I wish it were more (and you have never made any of us feel pressured or even asked) but you deserve all the goodness, Mark.

[@MarkNarrations]

Aww Carol thank you very much, that's incredibly kind of you 😊

[@emanx222]

This made me tear up honestly

[@rebelks88]

@@MarkNarrations It's pretty pathetic, I got ads anyways so they are still getting theirs 🙄

[@RedCeltay]

What do you mean? Please explain for me, thanks

[@viddergrapho8488]

@@MarkNarrations I'm moving over to Nebula. A lot of youtubers I like are transferring over there more and more. In fact, some of them had a hand in making Nebula. If you're looking for another streaming option I'd love to see you over there!

[@icantchange.youtubesaysine7338]

Damn. Nope. Glad she noped out. Also, he was doing little things to see how far he could go. When she resisted, that ticked him off. Glad she was able to call someone for help. This could have gone another way, which is scary to think.

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

Story 3: Yeah... OP needs to ditch Jocasta and Oedipus asap.

[@Russman67]

Story 3: To the husband, "Give this pink tutu a chance. I have a vision for the wedding." This mother-in-law is going to overstep every chance she gets.

[@thedarkwench]

Story 2: he has been listening to his mates comments and using it to undermine you. Can you record what he is saying and playing it back at him, or better still your solicitor!

[@pilyq2079]

story 3: pretend to change his tux and tell him to give it a chance.or tell him to marry his mommy so she can have that vision she talks so much about it.

[@sister_bertrille911]

The lockbox was a symbol to him that it was no longer true that what was his was his and what was yours was his. Leave the jerk, take the lockbox.

[@samanthacarpenter3336]

People like to say, don’t judge people based on how they act during the wedding process. I’m of the opposite mind, this is the time where you see your significant other for who they really are. It’s like seeing how a person behaves when drunk, and seeing parts of them they normally wouldn’t show to you. How a person behaves during a high stress situation is important, do they have your back? Are you the one who’s putting in more effort than them? Do they care more about family opinions than yours? Important behaviors to note, and to help guess future behavior.

[@TheMimiSard]

Story 3 - I may not have the emotional issues of a bride-to-be (I have heard so many stories where people are reluctant to break off a relationship because of the emotional connections) but having a wedding dress traded behind my back would be a cancelled wedding for me.

[@cjb2749]

I sincerely hope that OP #3 leaves that relationship BEFORE getting pregnant... giving in to this power struggle will only show them that she can be steamrolled. It will never end. The big red flag that's waving in her face is a gift that shouldn't be ignored.

[@danishaussie63]

S2: My favourite comeback for rude people telling you something wrong with any part of your body and what you should do with it is to say right back at them, 'you are aware you're no oil painting yourself ...unless your really into Van Gough'.... and then laugh at their reaction when it clicks what I have said to them lol.

[@sonialinsey8083]

My husband and I have a thing where we agreed to tell each other if our weight is getting unhealthy, but doing it in front of family isn’t the way to do it…it’s more like a sit down talk about health, not comments about your appearance…we also joke about it but that’s the relationship we have. This seems like something else entirely.

[@danishaussie63]

@@sonialinsey8083 I agree, there's ways of saying things with being an a-hole and mean. The 'best' part is then they actually have the nerve to get offended if they get pulled up over it lol. Never ceases to amaze me.

[@yozarahirvi4750]

Story 3 : this relationship is not worth salvaging, dump him, stop the engagement process, and let him have his mom's dream wedding sith someone else (my bet is : the mom herslef would gladly volunteer)

[@GrassJelly101]

"You don't like what you see? Fuck off!" Yes, Mark! Love the cheekiness!!! 👏😂

[@Mama_Bear_of_3]

Story 3. I would have agreed, then returned the dress, got the one I wanted, and not said and a thing. They all would have found out when I walked down the aisle.

[@Lersa25]

Next moment the groom runs away from the aisle to console his heartbroken mother, and the wedding is turned into drama festival, MIL sobbing and everyone blaming the bride for being stubborn and not a bigger person. Not a satisfying way to spend a lot of time and money.

[@slick8086]

Story 3: return the wedding dress and don't buy a new one.

[@TheIronwil]

Snacks: Holy crow, I'm glad OP is OK. I was seriously worried when she set herself to confront her BF. First, eating all the snacks is weird. Juvenile behavior I wouldn't even expect out of small children. His complete meltdown over the snack lockbox was also worrying. OP didn't seem to understand the extent of the problem before her BF destroyed her laptop. I was already nervous on her behalf at the constant eating all the snacks. It might seem like a small thing, but it's not. It demonstrates contempt and complete lack of self-control. I was not surprised at all when he became destructive. Good for OP calling her dad and the police. She had a narrow escape.

[@The_Mim]

He was waiting for an inch (the lockbox), so he could have an excuse to go out and act a fool and misbehave. This is narcissist behavior. Please be careful. Alot of time's when you leave, it's not the "end" of thing's per say. Thing's can statistically get much worse for the victim after they've left the abusive person.

[@LisaApril]

Story three: this woman has a crappy father “ just go with the flow and keep the peace”. What horrid advice. A great father, a good father would tell her “is this how you want to live your life after you get married? You can always change your mind before it’s too late”. And “you can do so much better”.

[@QuietRage]

Welcome to another episode of "Horrible Husbands: Why You Should Switch Teams - Electric Boogaloo 2.0"

[@alexiosblake9804]

The moment I read locked fridge i had to think of the story of the freezed food horder wife.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Story 3 reminds me of a TIFU I heard the other day. The guy said in some secret agent show he thought it was interesting they addressed the female superiors as mom, but they were actually saying ma'am. It just sounded the same due to the British accent. I don't consider that an FU because it totally does. When Mark said ma'am it reminded me of that.

[@kathleenmcfarlane2555]

Story 3: OP should not marry her fiance. Break up with that Momma's boy.

[@TheHellsHobbit]

#3 Op has a problem, HUGE red flag he is a huge mama boy his mama will be first all the time

[@brittalex42]

Last OP should give the ring back and tell him to give it to his mother instead.

[@malayshamorgan3918]

It is amazing how shit can escalate when it starts out as a simple problem

[@delilahbelle2125]

S2: My spouse wouldn't have gotten away with the first comment, let alone having it going on for months. OP grew a frickin HUMAN, and this dude bro is being an absolute AH. I can't believe no one else at that dinner table didn't call him on that sh*t! S3: "My mom has a vision." Marry your mother then! Ridiculous! Get out OP!

[@TheRealVenna]

The vehemence with which bf reacted to OP getting a lockbox suggests a much deeper issue related to food that OP may be unaware of, and it triggered his related trauma when she locked food away from him. He definitely has some disordered eating, and an unhealthy relationship with food, particularly 'snacks'. Speaking as someone with food related trauma, his reaction reminded me of my own reaction when my trauma is triggered. Bf needs therapy.

[@Syrahl696]

Story 2: what the Frick does he mean, "give the dress a chance"? It's a wedding dress! YOU ONLY GET ONE(per marriage, I guess, but still)! The dress had it's chance, IN THE STORE, WHEN OP PICKED A DIFFERENT DRESS.

[@Sandstimes]

Even living with my 2 teenage siblings, one of them being an athlete who is already the size of a grown man, I've never had someone act like this with food. If there's only 1 thing left in a box it usually stays there for a while to make sure anyone who didn't have a chance to get one gets one. This bf is definitely on something this is such a wild overreacted on his part

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

Story 1: I'm the "eat all the snacks" kind of person. Difference is I go and replace everything, and then buy my family's favorites for them.

[@MrBuns-yi2hk]

Story 2. Ah yes, the old "you need to go to therapy to fix your behavior" stunt. I absolutely hate it. Therapy can be very helpful, but using it as a bludgeon to attack your partner makes me furious.

[@toadsandmarkers4347]

So happy to be here when the video hasn't been posted for a minute yet

[@ThatsViews]

Story 2 Sally's husband is King Twunt. (I don't think that will get us demonitised, Mark!)

[@ComaLies225]

Story 2: I just came across a community post where a plastic surgeon posted a meme joke that said along the lines of: “when I tell my wife she could lose the baby weight if she wasn’t so lazy.” Cue doctor laid out on the floor, lol. Unfortunately, the comment section had a few posters where they experienced similar comments from their husbands. It’s pretty disgusting as pregnancy is already hard on a woman’s body. Are these men looking to get divorced???

[@Mrs.Self.Distruct]

Sometimes ya gotta lock up them snackies 🥨

[@sophieclair1]

Lmao my grandma always says if you don't like the way I look then don't look at me.

[@71160000]

Story one. My wife and I have been together for almost 30 years. I do the grocery shopping and cooking and I know what her favorite candy and snacks are. I try to keep some for her all the time and I rarely eat any of the treats I buy for her. It's a simple thing to show her I care. She sometimes comes home with some of my favorite treats for me.

[@Pippis78]

I remember a story where some family member, probably not the mil but maybe like a sil, decided to start calling the OP's baby with a name she thought up and told everybody in the family that was the baby's name or to call her (or something). Anyways the whole family adopted this name for the child and didn't use the name the mother had chosen. It was pretty crazy.

[@Midorikonokami]

Mark is so, so pure he leaves cusses in because he means them. This man!

[@LoveableNiki]

Story 3: NTA. BREAK UP!!! WE NEED AN UPDATE!!!

[@InDeathWeLove]

I think we tend to prioritise the bride too much in wedding planning in the sense that it's usually 100% the bride's wishes rather than being something shared between the bride and groom also that it isn't uncommon for impositions to be placed on guests just so the bride can live our her "dream wedding". However that doesn't mean the mother in law should have a place in countering major decisions regarding the event. Unless she is paying for the majority of the wedding she doesn't get a say in any decisions.

[@TT-fy6hk]

we NEED an update for story 3!!!

[@WobblesandBean]

OP 2: Same advice as OP 1: _RUN._

[@CensorshipVictim]

Story 2 NTA: OP needs to DTMFA ASAP! OP just had a baby and her husband is complaining about her body not bouncing back fast enough, but when she snapped, she was the childish one and embarrassed him?! WHAT drugs are OP's soon to be ex-husband on?

[@Dovaah]

Story 2: sure, it's his wedding too. But it's your body, your dress, your choice. You're not his mommy's dress up doll. He loves mama more than he respects you, and when that happens, you'll never be the most important one in his life as a spouse ought to be.

[@VidGirl88]

First story sounds similar to what happened to my sister. OP is smart to get out now. Best of luck to her and I hope she stays safe.

[@TriXJester]

Last Story: I'm going to start calling these types of MILs Jocasta instead of their names and see how long it takes em to figure that out. Calling those idiotic sons Oedipus to their faces would probably be a good hint. Then again I have all sorts of historic references to subtlety insult people with, benefits of having done a history major in school.

[@capucnechaussonpassion14]

Story 1+2 : both abusers accuse their victims of being one, the audacity...

[@novabrilliant4510]

Just letting Mark and everyone else here know how wonderful you all are.

[@wildridegaming874]

Story 3.. he took the wedding dress back and replaced it, now she should take that wedding dress back and ask for a refund as the wedding is off. This guy wants his mother to run his life, maybe he should marry her.

[@randomusername3873]

Am I the only baffled by him sending photos of wedding rings? Like you are literally breaking up after you smashed her computer, even if you reconcile what kind of moron would jump on marriage straight away

[@browniewin4121]

1) Leave, whatever is the cause of the problem it really doesn't matter at this point, he is behaving badly, selfishly, entitled, controlling, and abusive. Leave him, he has no respect for you and will not allow you to question him or check him when he is being unreasonable and in the wrong. You did nothing wrong and the lockbox is not the cause of this problem, his attitude and following actions are. After update: I'm glad you are not giving him a pass on his verbal assault on you and destruction of your laptop. I'm so glad you have support and got out of there. Food for your parents for recommending counseling. 2) How can you say his words are not hurtful, every comment he makes is unreasonable, offensive, and hurtful. He needs therapy the deal with his unreasonable expectations for your body after pregnancy and birth and for his thinking it is ok to be insulting you for natural changes. You are NTA, you are being abused and gaslighted. Get away from this childish, selfish, insulting and unsupportive man, unless and until he gets the therapy he needs to get an attitude adjustment, and makes a full 180 turn around in his way of thinking and behaving. 3) Be glad you have seen this wildly waving, huge red flag so you can break it off before getting legally tied to this momma's boy who will always put her over you. Run from this total AH and his intrusive controlling mother. You father is an idiot, do not take his advice. NTA unless you stay with this man to your own detriment forever after.

[@lapsedgoth]

Story 3: I let my MiL steamroll my wedding with a lot of stuff I didn't want. To the point where I had a renewal of vows on the same day a year later because I refused to accept that wedding as my wedding. It will 100% set the tone of your marital relationship going forward and OP and husband need to sit down and have a chat about what they want their relationship to look like. And what place their parents have in it.

[@stephanien6237]

How did your husband react to his mother?

[@lapsedgoth]

@Stephanie N at the time, he was more passive "we should just let her have her way." He's toughened up, though. XD

[@LaineyBug2020]

Story 1- I think a lot of people underestimate the power dynamics of food behavior.

[@tallyp.7643]

I think when it comes to "food thief" stories, it's one of the few times Reddit will declare the thief--whether male OR female--the A-hole. Food brings out the territoriality in many folks because much of what we "share" includes food, whether around the dinner table, events, whatever. And it goes double for someone who grew up with scarcity or bullying behavior around stolen food. Those stories break my heart, especially when you've got one half of the couple who likes to "playfully" steal some food from the other's plate until they snap.

[@candypettynettie487]

I'm glad OP in story 2 flipped out on him in front of his family. I hope she takes this time to realize that he's not for her and she needs to be free. Story 3- no argument. Relationship done. He can marry his mom. The fact that OP'S father said go with the flow! Where did all these creepy mofo's come from? I'd be helping my daughter pack.

[@littlestrawberryfaery]

STORY 3 : THERE WOULD BE NO WEDDING

[@crysb8051]

In the last story about the wedding dress, I would have been tempted to tell fiancé that yes I would “give it a try” and if it didn’t work for you that you would choose your preferred wedding dress for your next wedding because believe me, this marriage isn’t going to work. This is a prime future “just no MIL” situation combined with a mommies boy!

[@KeyClavis]

Story 1: He says the lockbox is disrespectful... but him taking all the snacks without leaving any for her is ALSO disrespectful. He would never see that though, since he's too incvested in his view of the situation. He's broken. Getting away from him and cutting ties was the best thing she could have done. He was a time-bomb and she could have been seriously hurt, mentally and physically. Story 2: "He never says hurtful words" Yes he does! And it probably started before the pregnancy. If the words hurt, then they're hurtful. He's verbally and emotionally abusive and that WILL NOT CHANGE... and that child is next on his list. If she doesn't get out for her own sake, then she should get out for her child's. Story 3: His mother is of primary importance. OP comes a distant second and that will never change. Their kids would be more important to him than her... because they will be his mother's grandkids.

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

Story 3: OP needs to run. Her fiance doesn't have her back and insists she kowtow to his mother's will over EVEN THE WEDDING DRESS. In fact, OP's fiance went behind her back to steal her dress and replace it with the one his mother wants her to wear. This will continue their entire relationship. Even the children will not be safe. Fiance is a momma boy and OP needs to run away from this crazy dynamic.

[@TwiggyHetfield27]

Story 3: "he got upset and said this attitude of mine isn't working on him or his mom" If I were OP. I would've gotten up, told him, "Okay, marry your mother then" & left. Dude is a complete utter mommas boy & that will never change. Best to leave the relationship. OPs dad really needs to open his eyes. The is the hill worth dying on. The fiancé can go marry his mom with all her "visions" while OP finds someone who will respect her.

[@piratsnygg]

I hope we get an update for story 2 in the future. I want to know how OP proceeds.