I Got What I Wanted and Now I’m Miserable

[@brooke9847]

My goal lately has been inner peace. The biggest "ah-ha" moment for me is when I read about the idea that being happy is a fleeting emotion and I realized that I should strive for the ability to adjust to what life throws at me without being sent into turmoil; it's been a process I am still working on.

[@victoriaporsiempre]

exactly! inner peace is it! being free of mental illness and being able to sleep at night 😌

[@texuztweety]

Brooke, Here are 2 concepts that will help you find inner peace: -- Radical Acceptance -- Emotional Sobriety Lastly, hand over your fears and anxiety to Jesus ❤

[@Daniellapalo]

Knowing Jesus died for you, accepting him as Lord and savior… giving us all a way out Get to know The Prince of Peace 🕊️ Jesus Christ 🤗

[@Doctor-stone.]

I’ll suggest you get the copy of the book named; Biuld The Life you want by Authur Brooks (wow he’s having just your name😅) I promise you it will change the narrative; i was at some point in such situation❤❤ Please let me know if you will❤❤

[@MaxiellCaminero]

It is a process and it's tough but with practice you can achieve true peace .. and that's what I want too

[@richstazio9291]

I drowned, under the idea of “I need to know of and deliver on my passion” and it ruined a lot of my 20s. A lot of pressure, and anxiety, a lot of comparing yourself to others. I absolutely love what John said, just worry about right now. That’s what I did, I just went to work and didn’t care at the time what I was doing, I just needed stability and consistency. My mind became so much more clear, and I built confidence in myself, started saving some money. All that lead to the next step of my life, then the next.

[@Ryekdd]

That conversation with Josh has me choked up a bit. Since getting out of the military several years ago (after 10 years of service), I've been struggling a lot to fit in and find/fulfill my purpose (whatever that is). Dr. John's advice to focus on the present and "do something", brings me peace for once in a very long time. I've been an instructor, a supervisor, a mentor etc., and I've given this very same advice to others before, but I guess I just needed to hear it from someone I respect. Thank you, Dr. John.

[@sarahp8937]

I can literally pluck learnings from every job ive ever done. No job is a waste..we can grow and learn from every job.

[@sheramelton3583]

I wanted to work in the veterinary field from the age of 6. Never explored anything else because animals, medicine, and science was my passion. Went to college for 5 years to get my bachelors degree, graduated, passed my licensing test, and got licenses in 2 states. I worked in the field for 10 years and spent my entire life working toward that point. And I hated it. The people in the field were TOXIC and abusive, the clients were mentally and physically abusive, and it sucked every ounce of love for the job out of me. I cried every day when I got home, I had panic attacks in the car every day going to work. I finally let it all go and now I work in a science lab performing drinking/waste water testing and I LOVE it. I am so happy. We have this unrealistic expectation that kids should pick something they want to do at a young age and its just going to work out as an adult. We need to change how we talk to kids about professions and let them know they need to explore a variety of things before commiting.

[@amyp.8848]

Im sure you gave amazing care to the animals and they were very thankful!!

[@suerainbird3752]

I got my dream place to study veterinary medicine finally in the uk at 32. It had been a lifelong dream but I wasn’t able to go as I fell pregnant with my beautiful daughter. It’s been a huge source of sadness for years that I didn’t go, and now I’m 57. But your experience makes me think perhaps I dodged a bullet and should come to some peace with it. So often our dreams don’t match reality and we make ourselves miserable over something that was never real. I’m so glad you found happiness in the end, perhaps I can too. All the best.

[@christinahek]

I've heard vet medicine has a really high burnout factor. It's not the animals. It's the people.

[@whitneyvaughan]

To the original comment, I too have wondered why people in the vet/medicine community are so godawful. Do you think it attracts broken people who take it out on coworkers? I have no doubt they love the animals, but it’s black and white with people. All good or all bad. If you want to share more, I’d like to hear your thoughts. Also, I’m glad you found something else!!

[@agymayachelonia8381]

Thank you for sharing this. We definitely need to be okay with doing something other than our childhood dreams, and also to be okay with letting go. Too often, we don't to the detriment of our health.

[@EneEri]

Can I just say that this episode was phenomenal from start to finish? It moved me enough to take action in my own life. Very thankful for you all and proud of myself. I’m keeping this one.

[@S42069]

This guy just needs to start trying things and experiencing them. I had TWENTY jobs before I landed in my career, and I've been there happily for 12 years now. Every job I had before this, taught me something that I still use today in my career. I look back and consider that my vocational training.

[@jordanrichied254]

I’m in a similar boat the guy is at 23 years fresh graduate. I work in banking rn and am not a fan. I think my concern to this is that I live in California and want to sustain myself without family support. It’s scary out here

[@S42069]

@@jordanrichied254 I don't have family that helps at all, but I have lots of friends and clients who threw down big time and helped me buy a house in the SF bay area. Just be generous in your relationships, and it will come back tenfold.

[@Cat22275]

Yep. I went to school for drywall 😂 did it for a year. Hated it. Worked all sorts of random jobs before being a SAHM. I can drywall, masonry, paint and trim an entire exterior of house, repair eyeglasses, sell you anything, especially diamonds and gold, milk cows😅, clean honeypots 🤢, bartend, clean floors with the giant waxer and all janitorial, teach archery, and so much more random stuff! I really still want to race cars, that’s the last thing I have not tried, but always wanted to. I’m turning 50 in February, so it will happen.

[@S42069]

@@Cat22275 YOLOOOOOO

[@MaxiellCaminero]

You are definition of a successful person . Never give up 🎉horray 🎉

[@customera7945]

I'm retired with plenty of time and no money worries. I was happier when I had the stress of work, school, and home upkeep. Back then, I had goals, personal connections, and feelings of accomplishment.

[@siegfriedbraun5447]

Retirement does not mean the end of challenges, unless you make that decision. Move to another country (learn a language), tutor someone, be a mentor. Don't deprive yourself and others, of what you have, to give.

[@carpediem6431]

Just watched a number of videos on thriving in retirement. They pretty much all coalesce into: 1. Get enough sleep 2. Eliminate stress 3. Eat healthy 4. Exercise regularly 5. Develop daily family, friend, neighbour etc. interactions 6. Keep your mind active (no spending 12 hours a day on Netflix, KZbin etc.) 7. Have a routine and a passion

[@HeyYou80855]

Sounds like you would do great as a volunteer.

[@nadineskye7050]

I'm sure there are many non-profit organizations in your area that would give you a sense of accomplishment. I work for one and the majority of our volunteers are retirees. We are so grateful for them and couldn't do what we do without them!

[@customera7945]

@@carpediem6431 I'm working on no. 5 and 7. Thanks. 👍

[@Candace-M-]

Sheesh no wonder Skye feels this way 😟 she gets patients coming in who have been hit by drunk drivers, and she's constantly reminded of what could've been her situation years ago.

[@willbdev]

In my 20s and 30s I took all the crap jobs and made the best out of them to support my family. Now in my 40s I'm finally chasing some things I enjoy doing. The journey and hope has changed my life already. I hope all the young ones go try everything in their 20s. Find what your good/half enjoy at before you blink, and it's been 2 decades, and it's time to start over.

[@nancymachold8006]

Josh (caller one) at 24 seems to be humble, ethical, and curious. I'm guessing some of the labels he was given as a child/young man are still echoing in his body. Good luck Josh, hopefully you can see those were only markers on your path but not the map for your future.

[@terriallen4107]

Well said! I echo each word! You’re awesome Josh! Best of luck to you…I’d say you’re going to have a wonderful life!

[@Wander_and_flow]

I hope the first caller finds something that he enjoys and also comes to realize that your job doesn’t have to define who you are. I used to beat myself up for not having a defining career- and then when I did, I got so burned out that my life nearly fell apart. I left that career, got hired doing something that isn’t a passion, but I enjoy it, it pays fairly, and it respects my time. The things that make me “me” happen outside of working hours in my personal life. It has taken a lot of pressure off by not feeling like my career has to check ALL of the boxes. At this point in life, work/life balance is most important (and being able to pay my bills and for the things I love to do!) Hopefully he can find the right balance. Staying in something you hate or doing what everyone else expects isn’t sustainable.

[@calibrial]

I relate to the first caller. Im a new RN and in my "dream specialty" and many nights am crying myself to sleep but at the same time wrestling with guilt. This is my third career and I'm 32.

[@grmpEqweer]

Maybe you could switch specialties. Or if it's stress burning you out but you WANT to hang in there, a therapist could teach you some coping skills. Just noting. Wish you well.

[@kimberlygorgoglione9237]

Dr. JOHN is very kind with callers. Dr. LAURA makes people feel like crap. What a difference between the two "methodologies. "

[@WhatTruthDoesForUs]

Oh my goodness you are absolutely right.

[@grmpEqweer]

Kindness is what most people need. 🙂

[@sinisterchin1592]

Josh, you rock! Hang in there. You’re smart and will figure it out. Don’t forget to pray too. Heavenly Father can work miracles.

[@AndiAlexander1]

This guy with the family business is putting his wife in the same position his family is putting him in. “Just keep hanging in there and your reward will come.” You don’t ever build what you want on the foundation of what is killing you.

[@tiffanyxxd]

Well said 👏

[@CatharineCummings]

💯💯💯💯

[@dirlenelopez6033]

Do you love yourself? Happiness in found inside of ourselves by apppreciating the simple things in life and being grateful for them. Nothing external can replace what you don't have inside.

[@kencurtis2403]

I studied in a field that I knew wasn’t my “passion” but I thought I might be good at (at the suggestion of a professor) and would make me marketable. It was one of the best decisions I ever made - I am a female engineer who can work the hours I want, as much as I want, and make a great hourly rate. Yes, it can be boring, but the money and flexibility make it worth it. I can do my passion - cooking, sewing, cake decorating, etc. in my spare time:)

[@christinevillicana9700]

"I set that down" Thank you! That is powerful and will be so helpful to me. Btw...NURSES ARE AWESOME!!

[@bluemountainlittle]

I get this… I always think “ I’ll be happy when … ” and no matter what it is - getting a degree, having a kid, buying a house, etc. I never feel happy. It’s just another thing that I’ve done but it’s never enough to feel fulfilled. I’ve come to believe that happiness doesn’t exist, and if you can get through life being mostly content then you’re probably one of the lucky ones. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@godislovepraisehim8483]

The only true joy and peace you’ll ever realize this side of heaven is found in Jesus. And that’s the truth. What you’re experiencing is called the God shaped vacuum. A void in our souls that only He can fill. Seek Him! ❤

[@Gotoworkkk]

Be grateful that you’re even able to give birth to a child. Some people can’t.

[@marysaltlife1427]

​@godislovepraisehim8483 I know and love GOD, but still have the problem. Yes, I pray as well.

[@AJZona-AJR79]

Learn transcendental meditation. Even having God in your life, like the people above me are saying, your mind needs to elevate, and that happens with transcending, not as much with prayer. By transcending you’re creating almost an alternative existence where you can look at the experiences of your life through a fresh lens. You’re working in conjunction with the creator instead of as a subject of the creator.

[@Moocow4576]

You might need medication for depression, it's not supposed to feel like life slog.

[@maryanne2939]

I became a Registered Nurse but had many interests. I worked part time in retail, clothing and hardware store, I was a volunteer firefighter/EMT, I volunteer with Boy Scouts as health and safety, volunteered with a group training therapy dogs and used my Nursing Case management skills, took classes and became a realtor. To stop learning is to wither away. No reason to limit yourself in your ,20s

[@tiffanyxxd]

Wife should come first everytime. She is the family you created with your vows and she ranks higher than the family you came from. No amount of money is worth the disrespect to her. 💯

[@Ordiaegel]

This never really goes away. I’m almost 40 and very successful on paper. But every other day, I find myself asking why? I’m glad this kid isn’t married. Bro, you have your entire life ahead of you. Travel the world. Teach overseas. Meet women and enjoy life. Don’t settle down too soon.

[@danielreeder62]

You are an absolute moron. Promoting a life of indulgence as though that will lead to a life of happiness. What you promote is called comfort.

[@justwondrin]

First caller I think is my favorite ever, the way JD responded.

[@arimax888]

I wasted my 20s feeling self looting and shame for failing to match my peers! I'm an intervort and this made me even more isolated with strange feeling of embarrassment which lead to depression. The first story resonated so much with me. I too felt so much that I could get into different things(my uni degree is in business) but never really acted on it!! I'm now 33 and slowly pushing myself to get out of this cycle and even starting to study computer science by myself and hopefully to get a master's degree in it. I;m so glad YT recommended this channel for me in May, John's advices are always compassionate & none judgmental

[@leahboynton1280]

I lived with shame like the second collar. Shame can only live in the dark. Speaking it out loud to John is the first step now tell your love. It's like jumping off a cliff but it's the only path to freedom. You got this

[@Maureen-q6w]

The DUI caller learned from her experience. That’s more than most people do when they get caught doing something they know they shouldn’t be doing. Let it go Skye. You better, however, come clean with your SO. If he finds out down the road, he will always wonder what else you have kept from him or have lied about. You seem terrified of losing him if you share this from something you did 6 years ago. Makes me think there’s more going on in this relationship.

[@kristynholding4628]

Loving the episode so far, but I'm just at the part where you're getting to your Cozy Earth sponsor. They are legit AWESOME.

[@karenhultgren7810]

I know many people who changed careers after finding out they hated the job they studied for. It’s ok to change. Do what fulfills you. It’s no good to be miserable.

[@Diashi1267]

When you realize many people live in self delusion and self deception because they’re weak and cowardly, you just have to turn inward and act from a place of internal motivation. Don’t allow the neuroses of others to infect you

[@mewgiah8057]

If anyone talked bad about my wife for no reason I would explode on them and end the relationship. I don’t even care if it’s my family or best friend of 30 years. There is no budging on this whatsoever. I feel bad for the final callers spouse. Imagine constantly being bullied by family and your husband does nothing about it. She must be feeling defeated and worthless. This guy needs to realize that feelings can change over time. Once someone starts to fall out of love with you or loses respect for you - it’s game over. Or almost impossible to reverse course. So in the moment he might think it’s fine. But it could be worse than he realizes.

[@Wants2knowitall]

Yes! I eventually left my first husband when I realized he would gladly throw me to wolves to save his own neck. Leaving him was the second best decision I ever made. I have no regrets.

[@GracieAdams-y6n]

My mom always said you make it what you want, but you may not want what you get.

[@TempestIsa]

It took a lot of corage for Josh to leave this carrer, it shows integrity. When we follow a path that are the dreams of others, we lose a part of ourselves. I just love hearing these young guys calling, and being vulnerable. Our society is so hard on men. Thank you John for sharing sll of the twists and turns of your career with Josh. I think, also, .....its ok not to know, but keep opening the doors, dont sit and wait for something to magically appear. Josh, your going to do well!❣️

[@vanessavalentin3788]

Sounds like he had a sales job. A lot of companies try to get you with marketing and then you realize it’s a sales job

[@geegee7036]

There is a difference between being at peace and being numb to life . I found the times I want to go back to is when I was at peace and pretty much nothing was going on big in life just like floating through life , rather than being giddy or having major things happen to me . I don’t know over time I started to associate happiness with peace and quiet . Not to say I don’t strive for success but I found it to be a huge part of why I am stressed out lately. I have been numb to life a lot of times sometimes it’s months , weeks or hours who knows , I found this to be the case after I achieve something I feel like butterflies in my stomach then boom days of feeling tired like in my spirit . It is hard when you associate different emotions with things cuz when get them and don’t feel what you are supposed to feel you feel confused

[@taylormoore3296]

Life is never linear. It’s okay to go and what aligns best for you.

[@TrunkyDunks]

I'm 29 and I'm still trying to figure it out. This is post military and college and trade school and SO much traveling. Honestly the only thing that helped me not feel anxious like this guy, was getting sober. Alcohol made me incredibly anxious and trepedatious in life decisions

[@theartofcrashingout]

I think mj is doing this to me, thank you

[@alexisballard1459]

I’m so grateful to have discovered the passion myth - you’re passionate at what you’re good at. Go practice!

[@3Torts]

lol

[@pld-wc7gf]

I'm good at many things that I don't enjoy doing.

[@debbieetheridge6813]

Completely love listening to your show almost everyday ! I have learned so much . I love how kindly & genuinely you listen & sit with people when they are open & vulnerable . As a former elementary educator for 33 years, you caring for people like I cared for children, you are the best of the best . When people and or children know that you truly care so much goodness & healing can happen . Thank you John . ❣️

[@Dixie8642]

First call-just loved how you handled that, DJD; bravo!!!

[@sheiladiaz2359]

Can’t follow passion of your heart until the foundation of your mental well-being is done first! This is why I like ROP in high school my daughter got to get her hands and feet wet in the medical profession and now she’s been a nurse for over 10 years or longer, but it just gives them a chance to go into the field whether it’s banking nursing teaching before they get their degree in it and realize that’s not what I wanna do

[@acd1168]

It’s normal to feel like that. He did everything he was told to do and then you are not still not happy. Been there and I fixed it by digging deeper into “why” I do what I do. Like in all aspects of my life “why” do I do what I do.

[@mallorypaddock163]

Idk that saying "Follow you Passion" is such a curse, so to speak. I, like the first caller, ignored a passion I discovered in college, and deeply regret not switching to a different major. I'm now in a part of life where I can't seem to shake the career I've had up to this point in the effort of pursuing something, anything new, that feels like it would bring me more joy than where I am now. I think that's largely due to this mindset of thinking I've wasted my degree, or that it's irresponsible to follow a new passion that supplants the hard work of the first. My Mother, and Grandfather, both have/had the kind of lives where they followed new passions, and changed careers to match their current mindset, and access other areas of skill that were innate to them. I look at their lives as beautifully fractal and mosaic like. They followed passions as their lives and interest changes, and have created an incredible patchwork of lives within lives that brought color to each decade.

[@nilsalmgren4492]

If what you want is a job, your life is burned up on nothing. If you have a job, then you are a cog in a machine. That cog can be replaced by anyone. So you are just nothing. You need a reason outside the job.

[@PANDAFACEEYES]

He just realised adulthood isn't what it's cracked up to be and he doesn't like it

[@saywhatnow57]

To be fair, this guy worked in marketing. It can't be soul killing. I worked at a large agency at this age (where I stuck it out 3 years). However, I got so tired of the B.S. one day that I walked into the COO's office, told him I was resigning, and that I'd go push a broom if I had to. I love the manual labor suggestion Dr. Delony gives here because that's EXACTLY what I felt like I needed at that time. My boss talked me into staying and gave me the power to change some things I didn't like. But it really just gave me time until I found a different job, which ultimately led to me starting a company. NOTHING I hated about that first job was "adulthood". It was just a job that I didn't like and a place I didn't need to be. I stayed in my career though. I've done meaningful work. And I don't lie or work with jerks anymore. And I've been more successful for it.

[@jdstep97]

@@saywhatnow57 I knew marketing majors in college. They all super extroverted personalities that to me, an introverted romance languages major, was overwhelming. The people drawn to that major would have been enough for me to know I didn't care for it.

[@saywhatnow57]

@@jdstep97 I mean this with the utmost sincerity and interest, but what type of career is a romance languages major typically working towards?

[@ritawallace-reed7500]

Don't be afraid to change careers by retraining. Careers can go extinct and ones current skills may not cut it. Change your situation and circumstance as life changes. There will be difficult times, keep working through them. Your guardian angels always show up to help you to the next phase of your life.

[@christinahek]

@@saywhatnow57 Interpreter, translator, business, teacher, dialect coach. Linguists today have a base from which to do cryptography or work with AI. It's can more useful than a generic business degree because you have an area of expertise. It's so weird to me when people are confused about what various humanities degrees are for.

[@Jessicas-Poems]

I think people need to know it’s okay to change your mind

[@BrotherTree1]

What you want isn’t necessarily fulfilling and meaningfully transcendent... and it shouldn't just end at one destination.

[@kittrocks]

True joy, peace, and fulfillment is in glorifying The True Most High. When you live for more than yourself righteously, fulfillment comes naturally. That does not mean allow others to abuse you or disrespect you.

[@sarahgordino6695]

I worked in marketing for 15 years. I’m 38 and last year I decided to go back to school and completely change careers (doing dental Hygiene now). Soul sucking is beyond an understatement. The pay is good, but not only is there no long term security in it, there’s salary compression happening because everyone is in the field. Get out while you can brother. You won’t regret it. Have it as a backup to come back to, but find something with good people.

[@bodaciousmos]

he doesn't need to talk to his dad he needs to talk to his mom and tell her you either make the other women stop or I cut you off and you won't see me or your grandchirldren . It is such a BS of John to tell him to leave the company it has nothing to do with the company and it won't be over after he leaves . he can keep his job and not visit his mom

[@zachzabala]

As a current graduate student for social work. I’ve been seeing a lot lately when it comes to someone who commits to something or someone just for it not to work out and now they seem lost or scared or unmotivated to restart. And now I’m starting to open my perspective more when it comes to my core ethical and moral values. Thank you for the reassurance when it comes to not knowing exactly what it is I want to do when it comes to social work. As I’m only 24 so as you stated “ I’m just getting started” I don’t need all the answers I’m searching for at this very moment.

[@brendakeiner5791]

Welcome to the grown up world! This guy needs to grow up to meet it! Every marketing job doesn’t require lying.

[@plywood7894]

You can be born perfectionalist!! My son’s first word was blue. We had a couple of stories about blue cars. There were multiple blue cars around the neighborhood. So we pointed at the blue cars and said blue. One day, he pointed at a black car and said blue. He thought blue meant car. I corrected him (“oh that’s a black car! Not blue”) and that was the last time I heard him say blue and he gradually lost all words that way and he was non verbal until 3.5. He was significantly delayed because he will give up everything he fails the first try. He is in intensive behavioral therapy and he’s finally catching up.

[@theartofcrashingout]

Omg poor baby 🥺

[@ChristianOne]

"Poo on the Move"😂😂😂❤ Loved the laxative commercial of Winnie the Pooh. Lol 😄😄😄❤❤

[@KoDough]

I can relate to the first caller 100%. I also graduated specializing in marketing. Had quite a few sales jobs brought up to me. I told myself I wouldn't sell something I wouldn't buy or believe in myself. (especially if I saw my clients I don't want them thinking "ohh god he's gonna try and sell me something again") I changed my field early on to get into finances. I have my own business on the side and have no issues selling for it because it's a passion of mine! Don't give up on what you love, just find way to build who you are!

[@imdee9024]

This guest is a ROCKSTAR! What a wonderful boy

[@titansmgr]

Thank you Lord. In you I am full and never lacking.

[@texuztweety]

Complex PTSD from a drunk driving incident. The emotions from the incident are trapped in her body

[@Demetrius_Ambrose]

I recently realized the two shows I watch the most are Frasier and this one. I’m not sure what to do with this information but I find it curious.

[@theartofcrashingout]

Fellow frasier watcher here! I play it in the background as my comfort show. My joke references are archaic as a result so there’s that. Posh whiny rich guy humor isn’t everyone’s cup of tea 😔 and incidentally, neither is John D’s muppet scream

[@northlakeghost]

This is such a fresh take!

[@ritawallace-reed7500]

Second caller: Don't just leave your job. Just do your job and avoid family gatherings if you must until you get a better situation. You can always lose someone or something in this life including your wife- divorce whether or not you stay. Act wisely.

[@MaxiellCaminero]

I think having a good life is gratitude. Yes easier said than done ... Living in the present and not comparing is tough in this world however will set you free from feelings of missing out... I think once we reach our goals maybe we don't feel content because we already have it. It doesn't become a hurdle or a challenge anymore .it's easy and I think humans are evolved to compete and to strive for something . I noticed when I wasn't working I was miserable but than when I started it I was also,.. life is always going to be challenging.. I always tell people that no matter if you are wealthy or not life will always happen

[@CHrisPetE056]

Royce, I worry because I’m older but I’ve always been told don’t lend money or anything to family or friend. I think working with family or friends might be the same. Without written signed documents and respect at the workplace like a workplace!😮. I’m with dr D. I would be very cautious. Money can split up family as fast as strangers. 😢. You should be strong and be prepared and be very cautious ❤❤❤❤. Take care.

[@amyitis]

I relate so much to the 1st caller.... I followed my passion, and although I don't regret it, it's hard to know where the industry is headed when you get into it, and now things are unpredictable that it's easy to regret in hindsight....but how would we have known? Now wanting to get back into mental health is something to contemplate

[@Pixlanta]

Fist Dude, happiness fleeting at best,just go to work at any job any job , stop hoping to be where you want right away, pay your dues, happiness will come once you accept that you’ll discover you’re ever changing and keep trying in your free time to figure i7t who you are but stick with your jib now and in a few years, you’ll be happy there. Don’t waste your time giving up and wasting your time. Live daily,have gratitude. Life is a long journey.

[@chocochoco1381]

Josh sounds cute. I'm in the same place I've to say. I want to do everything but not really at the same time and it gives me ANXIETY 😖😖

[@TheAgentmigs]

Following your passion is NOT a myth..you just need to be realistic and compromise when needed.

[@millier.206]

Well I think passion isn’t always what your body and mind needs or wants. And that can be a lot harder to find out.

[@dinahdelaney7112]

Good on you Josh. Keep on going.❤

[@pamelavesey6381]

If his wife is being actively disrespected then he needs to choose. Or she will leave him later. With the kids. Dr. John was so right on with all his advice, to all the callers today.

[@erikaberrio8927]

LMHC here. I’ve worked in mental health for over 25 years. Private non profit residential work will definitely know where u stand in mental health. Lol. That was My first job after my BA. By the way, when I was in grad school many fellow students had no experiential piece prior to their Masters. Some of them… dumbfounded when they finally did their internships. Work it while u work it, u know. Ps I finally got my Masters with a FT job, married, with a little one and a disability! It’s possible. Not easy, but possible!

[@Dixie8642]

Fam business call-so beautifully handled, and this was a great point that cracked me up: “DUDE! We’re about to have two Presidential candidates in their 80s!! This could go on for 15 years!!!” 😂😂👏🏻👏🏻

[@amandathompson7269]

I was married to a man working at a family business. It wasn't even his family, but he was told he would run it someday, so he chose that over me and our family. Compromised his morals in his work dealings and had an affair with one of the family members. Overall became someone I didn't recognize. He had a choice between being a family man and honoring his wife or choosing the business. In my mind, he chose poorly and won't find fulfillment there.

[@yvonneerrend8217]

I believe you can get glimpses and moments and days of happiness through your life, but it's never consistent. I had a beautiful family, a husband, a successful company, tons of really genuine amazing Friends, and the most beautiful daughter on the planet, and now I have grandkids, but without God, and being in a relationship with God, you truly will never find any type of happiness. After my husband left me, of 26 years, I really have not been truly happy sense. It's God's way of keeping us dependent upon him for our help and happiness. If you can realize people and things and money can never make you happy, ever. It just helps to relieve the stress... I pray everybody finds their contentment in God.❤

[@EJC-q5g]

1 job in a field is one job. There are marketing positions in many industries. You could do community outreach, do marketing in the music industry or be a public information officer etc. Do more career exploration within marketing.

[@kathydaughety5406]

I heard Josh say, "Music Therapy." Maybe look into a degree in music therapy? It is a very intense music program with psychology thrown in, also. Some parts of music therapy is just using common sense. Good luck, Josh!

[@mariaking4950]

I worked as a qualified music therapist for over 20 years. I think it could be a very suitable career for Josh but it is quite intense and he would benefit from a few years working in a health/care/ children's setting, on a basic level, as a nursing assistant or a teaching assistant for example. There he can learn the skills of a vocational workplace, dynamics with colleagues, gain confidence with people and see how things tick. Then he would be in a great position to explore a specialism such as music therapy with experience, a more formed world view and maturity.

[@joywebster2678]

​@mariaking4950 psych techis another option in behavioral health centers. They hire music therapists for adult patients.

[@jenandreb]

I admire the 3rd caller for standing up for his wife, but what if she is the problem and he throws away a promising career for her? We don’t know the details or dynamics.

[@JetaimeElizabethmorganHi-qh6vw]

Do what you love and the money will follow,my son felt like you and he at 45 years is Happy, doing what he loves, very successful, so I shared this with him after near 6 years of College University, so it was great for him ,i dont him do not be concerned about what others think about start pay of $9.00 an hour,unbelievable where he is today first he is happy

[@JetaimeElizabethmorganHi-qh6vw]

You may have to be committed and work diligenty,he is happy ,he does a service for others ,best wishes

[@JetaimeElizabethmorganHi-qh6vw]

Thanks John wonderful advice be grounded with creativity or the good earth, such wisdom ,gratitude is a great attitude

[@Kinglore2000]

In my experience, others are miserable when I'm successful.

[@2ewSentz]

I def feel this so much; however the indecisive jack of all trades thinking caused a major “failure” in my success as a full functioning adult; I don’t have one great thing bc I don’t want just one thing for the entirety of my life it’s so daunting…I wish I could say it becomes more clear w age but it almost becomes less clear bc I never just made a decision and stuck with it long enough to make something “real” out of it…so now I take what I can get instead of being desired for what I can do, if that makes sense…but happiness is not in the workplace that’s fs

[@Dixie8642]

LOVE the Pooh story. ❤️❤️❤️

[@estermalkabecker]

I've never watched the ad reads so intently😂

[@christinahek]

Part of the problem is American society defines people by their job. It's one of the first questions people ask when they meet people. So there's this idea that having some job/career is an identity versus the idea that earning a living can be a journey that involves lots of different things. Very few of us have one thing we're meant to do that's a lifelong vocation.

[@gabec9897]

What an episode, very familiar with what he’s going through 😢 and I’m about to turn 34!!

[@deb9806]

My old friend left marketing too because it made her feel awful. You can reinvent yourself

[@BackgroundBeats-cb1mx]

He should call Ken Coleman next to help him! I loved all hearing all the different subjects/jobs/interests of Dr. John Delony! So interesting! I think he's found his spot helping people here on KZbin for sure! 😁

[@Mustangman65]

I like how John recommended manual labor, you can tell he's never been told no in his life or faced any kind of real strife. Sad people are being raised to be so fragile, he needs some adversity in his life.

[@desireesalas5820]

My thoughts exactly

[@og666]

the caller actually talked quite a bit about his struggles. did you not listen to the call?

[@straight.no.chaser1708]

Did a marketing degree at 18 learned hiw corruption works and by the end of it didnt want to lie for a living. Great lesson learned never used the degree.

[@joywebster2678]

My cousin took her marketing degree into managing advertising for companies like Burger King, and a Major pizza chain. So no moral choices, more management of making sure the ad execs delivered on time, due dates for campaign roll outs, etc. So there are paths less morally compromising.

[@AngelEyes-xm7el]

64 now homeless, living in a truck. Healing, my family with open bedrooms in there house don't care. I was in a co-op that houses felons but they did not tell me. My life was threatened with a gun, knife, my son in law said stalking is everywhere. You just gotta deal with it. I have not heard from my kids in months. I text but no response. They have no idea i am homeless. Disabled and disposable .

[@grmpEqweer]

...Hun, you're not disposable. I don't have any brilliant advice on how to dig out of this situation, but you're not disposable. Please treat yourself with the respect you'd give someone else.

[@AngelEyes-xm7el]

@@grmpEqweer thank you God bless you and yours. 🙏

[@braedenmatson-jones1071]

Been in marketing for over 7 years and had a lot of different jobs, in a lot of different functions. John's advice is good, but with one caveat: Marketing isn't marketing in the same way no industry is. Don't jump to conclusions about an entire field based on one job. My first marketing job was boring AF, and instead of saying "I don't like marketing," I moved into another role. There is such thing as quitting too soon.

[@hollyp9811]

I feel his struggle. The answer is not in yourself, in a new job, etc. The answer is to seek God. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the LIFE. You can have peace even while going through horrible things. I’ve been through so much. If it weren’t for God helping me, I would be in deep depression or even dead. I pray you find Hope.

[@millier.206]

I don’t understand how someone can judge the entire field of marketing on one bad place?

[@jdudefun1755]

I know a highly successful realtor who got a degree in marketing. Try putting that marketing to use in a career that you enjoy.

[@ashleyduckworthyt3224]

I feel like Delony missed it on the first one. I think this caller simply needs to go work at a diff marketing company. I HATED my first job in architecture bc my boss was an asshole and everything was disorganized. When I left that job and went to ANOTHER design job…. It was a 180 shift. I think he was just working in an office where no one cared if they were immoral and unethical and that didn’t suit him. Go look for a different agency and I think you’ll be able to use that degree with no problem. Don’t just go get a job at Walmart throwing boxes like John said… for gods sakes USE the degree you paid for.

[@lisak7833]

💯 agree. I’ve worked in Marketing for 10+ years and have worked for some pretty shady places. Need to find a business that values fostering trust and honesty with clients. He should know from school company’s #1 goal is to maximize shareholder wealth- then look for what is important after that. I appreciate working for an employer that has values I align with.

[@ashleyduckworthyt3224]

@@lisak7833 1000% agree. That would be a good strategy for him to find his place in the industry. Your first job isn’t going to represent the industry as a whole, and I really wish John saw that instead of thinking he should go throw boxes at Walmart… NO WAY, Doc.

[@tomnohmy1273]

He's young, get a grad degree or vocation, peace corps, lots of avenues to explore

[@TampaCatGirl]

He could get a job marketing for a non profit that he is passionate about and that could solve the job problem while he pursues a psychology degree and possibly stay with the same organization.

[@kimberlygorgoglione9237]

I know what's wrong with the emergency/trauma nurse and her shame over her DUI from several years ago. She tends to patients all during her working hours that were in car crashes and various other accidents. She can't believe how close she came to hurting someone and/or herself. The reality of that is tearing at her soul. Delony should have explored that with her. This is the time to go to God and dump it on Him in prayer and finally understand the wisdom in "But for the Grace of God here go I."

[@magdalenapichler4182]

My husband studied law till L.D., then he found out that bad people need lawyers to do even worse things on his job. He is glad that insurances also need good advocates.😅

[@karri8998]

I understand he thought he hated the career he educated for however maybe the issue was the place he was working at not the job. I would recommend that he try it again at a different place but in a part time position. You can not make a decision from one experience. The scary part is that no matter your age it is hard to decide what you want to do. Take my dad's advice don't think about what you want to do for the rest of you life do something that you want to do for the next 5 years.

[@ST-rj8iu]

Hating your job and hating the company you work at are not the same thing. Marketing is not lying. Sounds like he needs to go get a different job at another company. Getting another degree in a field that you have no experience in doesn't guarantee a better outcome. That is bonkers! Sounds like colleges are turning into Disneylands that young people never want to leave.

[@lisak7833]

It sounds like the company lacked integrity. There’s bad jobs but bad companies are just as worse. Many components to a “great” job.

[@eugenewang4650]

marketing, by its nature, is lying. Fooling people into buying things they dont need to impress people they dont even like. The very nature of the profession is to increase profits by making people waste their money. Only exceptions are if the product being marketed is advertised in a non-intrusive way and the product genuinely brings improvement to the world at a fair price. Eg, I would be perfectly happy being a Toyota car salesman selling quality, long lasting and very reliable vehicles that will be a completely stress free experience but would be disgusted with myself being a Jeep salesman, selling absolute garbage lemons lying to customers that the vehicles are good quality. And even then, my sales performance would be negatively impacted as I will tell customers not to take out loans and advise them to buy a used Toyota with cash from someone else.

[@pld-wc7gf]

Unless you're marketing something that is truly of service to other people, it's a soulless profession.

[@nancypicchi9224]

This caller needs a charitable endeavor. Most of the wealthiest among us find their true happy place is the good they bring to others, including animals & wildlife. It gives a bored person purpose.