I Left My OWN WEDDING After My Husband Embarrassed Me r/Relationships

[@sophdog2564]

Imagine being the Uber driver who helped the bride escape her own wedding

[@cmsxcb]

Imagine the cleaning up he had to do afterwards!

[@Araraki-Itto1]

Uber driver: So where ya headed? OP: Away from my asshole husband and family who love to publicly humiliate me. Uber driver: .....That's rough buddy.

[@iamalbertwesker2]

Uber driver on hearing the story: 👁️ 👄 👁️

[@clarabp2613]

He/she was the driver of the getaway car

[@Julienna]

@@cmsxcb the driver should have made the ex-husband/idiot pay for it! PS: You are completely heartless, when this is what you think about in all this painful happening. You lack empathy.

[@spoopy132]

Story 2: is no one else baffled by how many comments OP got calling her a gold digger? She didnt at all sound like one, she literally only said theyd have to live within her means if they split stuff 50/50 which is absolutely reasonable and logical?? I currently earn more than my bf so I willingly spend more on bills because I can afford to. If I wanted him to go full 50/50, of course we'd have to cut back on spending! And the update really proves shes not a gold digger because a GD would have left him the INSTANT they heard he was broke and in debt.

[@tully6648]

Honestly, I wouldn't have called her one if she left anyway. He's broke, in debt, and his first instinct was to put that on OP, then get mad when she said "Okay, let's start working to make it work." I really don't get what his plan was here, TBH.

[@spoopy132]

@tully6648 I wouldn't blame her either but I also see why he reacted the way he did. If he was raised with money, he probably felt pressure to keep up a certain appearance and to live a certain way. Clearly he was trying to do it all by himself at first and then panicked when it didn't work. I definitely wouldn't blame her for leaving in this situation but I also think it's something that can be worked on together

[@damien678]

​@@tully6648 Honestly they sound pretty incompatible. She wants to live within her means, he's utterly desperate to live above his

[@LunaGirl196]

Plus the thing that bugs me the most is he listens to sexist incel like podcasts: so that’s 🚩🚩🚩

[@penelopelane5753]

@@LunaGirl196exactly!!! I didn’t get all the comments insisting he was trying to motivate her to level up and be more ambitious. Whaaaattttt??? That’s the LAST assumption I would make. He totally sounds like a sheep that’s been listening to the “go 50/50” and “but what does SHE bring to the table” incel BS on repeat. And they have the nerve to write articles about the current generation of men being lonely and alone!! You think??? You don’t know how to talk to women like human beings and you wonder why you’ve got no one!? SMH

[@katwitanruna]

Excuse me?!?! I think smashing cake in someone’s face without their consent is INFINITELY more childish than walking away from bad behavior.

[@DameNickum]

I agree, I’m not a violent person, but I might slap that idiot before walking out. Good for her, she maintained her composure even with cake all over. Soon to be ex is an AH.

[@trout512]

Yeah, legally I'm pretty sure that's assault and/or battery. It's gross how many brides are told it's okay to be hurt on their wedding day if it's to make the groom happy.

[@kemonono]

@@DameNickum I'd start biting, slapping maybe some punches I do NOT tolerate that shii

[@SkyEcho751]

No, Not "Childish". I'd honestly consider this the edge of straight up Battery at this point. Especially after OP got hurt the first time it happened.

[@lynnw7155]

Yup; smashing cake in my face, especially after being warned, is a deal-breaker for me. Marriage over; I could never trust that person again. OP needs to get ALL those people out of their life.

[@hausofphid3966]

It's not about cake. It's about trust. She explicitly told him she did not want this done and that she would leave, and he did it anyway. If she can't trust him with this small thing (and he stands by his decision, no apology), how do you have a relationship?

[@livewellwitheds6885]

absolutely. he completely ignored her clearly stated boundary. it's also very odd that he seems to listen to and respect her family over op, his actual wife

[@christophercole64]

Not, only a clearly stated boundary. But one with a Scar

[@rickraber1249]

It's not odd at all. They're abusers, he's an abuser. They understand each other. He undoubtedly picked OP because she was a trained victim. That's what abusers look for. @@livewellwitheds6885

[@brianbarber5401]

@@livewellwitheds6885abusive AHs/bullies flock together.

[@pippo17173]

And to add the cherry, reddit post wouldn't be complete without cheating. I swear that is a requirement at this point.

[@VidWatcher01]

The mom called OP a Brat for when she was the ruined her birthday? I swear people who do that so of thing are absolute narcissists

[@maxinemyers9215]

The mom really was terrible!

[@kawaibakaneko]

Please how dares OP bleed everywhere uuurg seriously she *ruined* her birthday. I hate her mother, I never lied to my daughter (wich can be hard since she is only 4) and I want her to able to trust her parents, we hope to be her safe haven, so imagining betraying my daughter like that, hurting her and blaming her, it's infuriating!

[@stirrednotshaken4823]

They all laugh and say it’s just a joke…but I want to know if dear ole mom has ever had her face shoved into a cake or if it’s just a joke when it’s somebody else! I bet hubby wouldn’t think it was so funny if he was on the receiving end of that cake to the face. 😡🤦🏼‍♀️😡

[@paulagoeringer9466]

​@@stirrednotshaken4823it's always funny when it's other people. When it's them, it's war.

[@rickraber1249]

And if OP had put up with the "joke" and stayed with the a-hole, imagine what the rest of the reception pictures would have looked like - cake from her face to her waist, in her hair, makeup ruined. You don't just wipe that goo off. If the cake cost $500, what did the ruined dress cost? @@stirrednotshaken4823

[@janedoe885]

This is anecdotal, but I've repeatedly seen wedding planners comment that cake smashing is basically a predictor for divorce. Shows that one partner has zero respect for the other and takes joy at their expense.

[@ndawn90]

There is actually statistical data to back that up.

[@damien678]

​@@ndawn90 Do you know if there's data on which gender does it more? I'd be curious to see if it's one more than the other, and just how big of a difference (if any) there is with percentages

[@simonO712]

​@@damien678I'd be interested in that as well

[@Dostoron]

The only time that infantile joke works is if the wife also laughs at knock knock jokes.

[@Ruthavecflute]

Makes sense

[@catherinecox573]

A good man would never play a prank that could trigger his new wife's trauma... What constitutes "just a joke" depends entirely on what the prank victim finds funny. She literally told him it would be a deal breaker and he SUCKS for not taking her seriously from the start.

[@kelseybrexit5224]

“It’s just a prank bro” Oh yeah same. I’m just divorcing you because I’m in a silly goofy mood today 🤪

[@pippo17173]

This is where I now see why the family accepted him so fast. People are right that he is a abuser because he found his People and will make op suffer for fun.

[@Lolalolo1996]

If you want deeper than that I mean wedding makeup is really expensive so he's getting your hair done for your big day and women are expected to look perfect on their wedding days at all fucking times and this was to embarrass her and I don't understand that it's cruel I didn't her trauma and it just how the fuck did this guy even get to the engagement part if this is his behavior

[@Zurround]

@@Lolalolo1996 If there is a way to SUE HIM for those expenses she should do it. Its more than just the money. Suing him HURTS HIM and HURTS HIS REPUTATION and is added revenge.

[@Lolalolo1996]

@@Zurround honestly if she was my friend I'd be going complete scorched-earth on his ass

[@BruinPhD2009]

Holy cow. Everyone repeat after me: "It's better to be alone than to be lonely." Staying in a relationship with the wrong person is a surefire way to be lonely, and that has got to be one of the worst feelings in the world.

[@MoochoSawesomeo]

Wife: I have a lot of trauma around doing this very specific thing, so if you do it, then I’m leaving you Husband: (does that thing) Wife: (Leaves) Husband: (surprised Pikachu face)

[@GrumpyOldFart2]

You are absolutely WRONG!! It’s Husband: Whiney pouty narcissist spoiled brat face. 😅

[@jamieemeagi7377]

@MoochoSawesomeo very eloquent

[@JW-vd4il]

😁 well done. When OP said that the husband said to her, "You should see the look on your face," I thought: Wish I could see the look on HIS face when that Uber drove tf away!!!

[@wintermute9459]

There may have been room to reconcile if he didn't know of the the previous trauma, but it's a deal breaker especially since she explicitly said she'd leave him over it.

[@narliehs1648]

​@@wintermute9459Honestly, the deal-breaker for me was the lack of sincere apology, the anger, the "immaturity," etc. But then, I'm not groomed to accept such behavior from anyone. My family is shit, but at least I somehow managed to escape believing that bs. Hope OP can get into some good therapy and find her own self-worth. She deserves better.

[@Lestaticate]

Story 1: OP didn’t waste her life, she dodged a bullet, and I’m glad she has a great support network with her friends. Meanwhile, her ex-numbnut and abusive mother seem like the perfect match. Let’s hope they don’t procreate and have cursed cake-smashing children together.

[@kentario1610]

Eh, I'd think they'd have children whose faces they smash in cake repeatedly until all trust is broken, unless there's one golden child who's never the victim of it, in which case they'd be the next smasher.

[@johnbradbury8610]

Op still needs therapy, she ignored a hell of a lot of red flags.

[@Kayenne54]

I'm so glad this happened. It was absolutely doubly traumatic for OP, but it also helped her escape a potentially abusive relationship. He caused her more trauma so her family would like him? Knowingly? She will thank him for doing this one day, preferably from another state or even a country, and only in her own thoughts, but she's been shown a way out of a relationship where he had no empathy (i.e. sociopath). I honestly don't know many women, or men, who think this dumb habit is funny either. It should be socially outlawed.

[@Kayenne54]

@@johnbradbury8610 He sounds like a sociopath. She made a lucky escape.

[@helenafarkas4534]

she didn't dodge *a* bullet, she dodged an entire Firing Squad!!!

[@madambutterfly1997]

He clearly has no respect for your boundaries. And calling you emotional is sociopathic

[@rickraber1249]

The guy's abusive, plain and simple. She dodged a landmine.

[@pippo17173]

And reddit without being reddit, turns out he is a cheater. Honestly I should be expecting it for every post involving dating problems that blows up because sometimes I think its just them deflecting.

[@madambutterfly1997]

@@rickraber1249 if he’s a landmine, I’m scared to see what a nuke would be like.

[@Zurround]

@@rickraber1249 Having your wedding ruined is way better than having the next several years of her life ruined if she stays with the @$$H0L3. And APOLOGIZING would be worthless as abusive people often apologize and then abuse again in the future and then apologize again.

[@calmandfree]

Premium Gaslighting ✌🏾✌🏾

[@mutegirlsirius8940]

Let me see if i get this, OP told the husband the reason and and why she hates that prank, and he chosed the most important day in a couple life to do what she said she hated. The best solution is cutting all of them of OPs life.

[@thebladeofchaos]

it's even worse when you follow the chain. He did it because he wanted to look good to her family her family that she didn't get along with and he HAD TO FORCE HER TO INVITE he's an abuser trying to isolate her and trying to bring in more abusers to help

[@calico_queen8976]

​@@thebladeofchaos This. The ex basically values and listens to his fiance's abusive family more than his fiance.

[@pippo17173]

​@thebladeofchaos ya this is where I'm starting to notice it. I legit believe op family was so accepting to him because he is like them. If it were a decent person, this post would of gone differently.

[@debl3063]

I don't get why people would pay $500 for a cake only to ruin it. Did the guy not realize how much that cost? I think I would have brought that up in a conversation at some point while fiance was watching those videos. And if OP were determined to marry the man, why would she even have cake? Because... 1. family history with her and cake. 2. husband can't get enough of cake smashing videos. 3. Husband cared more about OP's abusive mother being invited to the wedding than OP wishes to not have cake smashed in her face. There would be no cake. Though, the cake smashing was a great eye opener her for OP, so I guess that worked out for the best.

[@Zurround]

If he had any love ore respect for the OP he would NOT have been effing another woman (his previous partner) on a regular basis for six months prior to the wedding. If she can prove that she might be able to sue him for marriage fraud since it would establish not infidelity technically since it was before they were legally married but it would establish that he is in love with a different woman.

[@shellchenonceau6987]

The groom revealed to the bride how the next 50 yrs were going to go. After the ink is dry on the wedding certificate to trap you, their TRUE personality comes out.

[@kahare9565]

Might seem extreme but I kinda believe you shouldn’t sign the certificate until after the wedding (in general)

[@calico_queen8976]

As OP stated, he isn't sorry that he humiliated OP and ruined their wedding, he is sorry that his actions have caused negative impacts on him, which he still blames OP for. It's a good thing that OP was able to leave this guy caus being married ti him sounds like a nightmare in the making.

[@mercurialmelody]

I'm so sick of people being like "how did you not know you were being abused?" You'd be surprised what can be normalized, or how one can even be gaslighted to believe they deserve it. It doesn't necessarily start out obvious, even if it's normalized through family. At any rate, it's very victim blame-y when people say that and, as an abuse survivor, I hate it.

[@damien678]

These people are thinking rationally, but not emotionally... It's very emotionally understandable; and, funnily enough, not entirely logical to not consider emotional thinking and rationality as a part of the equation.

[@thehawkseye3412]

It is really hard sometimes to recognize the "abuse" as abuse when you are in relationship. Especially if it's not outright and direct physical assault. There maybe things that you like about the spouse so you ignore or try to tolerate some other things. Or you maybe groomed in to thinking, you are the one making mistakes and disappointing others. So it's your fault and you are the one need to fix yourself, so you keep trying to make the abuser happy...

[@melissajill6174]

@@thehawkseye3412It would be especially hard for someone who has been abused previously to get into a new relationship that seems less abusive to recognize that "less abusive" is not equal to "non abusive".

[@BruinPhD2009]

Second story: I say this as someone who teaches at a university. We in the US have an unhealthy relationship with college education. What started out as a good thing (higher learning about many things is desirable) has turned into this monster where we bully people who don't go to college, force some people to go that don't want to go, make it financially devastating for most people to go, then make fun of people who risk that devastation to go. I think we should always provide every opportunity to attend a college/university, but we shouldn't be forcing people to go that don't want/need to go (some careers don't require a college degree), and we certainly shouldn't be denigrating people for the choices they make.

[@Nevertoleave]

I have to agree. And it’s not done by the same people so it’s like a few different types of assholes are trying to rock the boat while ignoring the gaping hole in the sinking the ship

[@PrayerWarrior4]

Agreed, I've had family and friends growing up who are in both camps...pushing to go to a special field instead of my choices, and making fun of me for going at all telling me it was all a mistake. I did have to change my major due to economic issues but I still got work in a field I am good at and even kept me working during the lockdowns due to it being considered essential. It sucks when the people who claim to support you don't show the encouragement they claim. 😢

[@damien678]

As an Aussie that doesn't deal with this, I completely agree. Nothing wrong with being a Tradie or not doing higher education

[@wmdkitty]

We need trade schools just as much as -- if not more than -- we need colleges.

[@PrayerWarrior4]

@@wmdkitty true, though community colleges that offer the same certifications for less time and money

[@DragonbornMike-ym2er]

Story 2: Gotta love when someone who is financially dating down expects the other person to pull magic money out of their ass. If you expect to live 50/50 for the money, you need to live within the means of both partners. The update just makes the finance sound even worse.

[@MasterBuilderDragon]

I really hope she dumps him.

[@kalishaffer8210]

​@MasterBuilderDragon I agree. OP is trying to save him. She is better than him or his family. She is smart and can do better. I wish she grasped that.

[@ShiNijuuAKL]

@@kalishaffer8210 nah, she earns nothing, it is definitely more convenient to keep the husband and also control his finances. everyone wins!

[@j_g9109]

@@ShiNijuuAKLShe makes nothing yet is now worth more than him. He’s bringing in 135k and has *none of it.* It would be infinitely more convenient to her to leave him; then she wouldn’t have to pay this irresponsible man’s debts.

[@ShiNijuuAKL]

@@j_g9109 The thing is that she doesn't and can't pay for his debts, be she could manage his money. The scenarios are: Scenario 1: If they divorce they both become poor, wife because she earn nothing and husband because he waste it all. Scenario 2: They stay together and she manages their finances. Now they both live a decent life

[@Mammongus]

Poor OP. Failed by everyone who should matter in their life. Horrible nasty abusive people. I hope they go NC and find their peace and someone to love them like they deserve.

[@ElleD308]

Probably because she lets them. She needs therapy and to learn how to see the massive red flags she danced with and how to put a stop to situations like this.

[@abeal49]

everyone in HER life. There is only one of her (unless SHE has multiple personalities)

[@paromora6207]

​@abeal49 actually "them" can work when referring to a singular person. You should watch the Tim an Moby episode on pronouns since it explains it in an easy to understand way

[@narliehs1648]

​@@paromora6207It can, though in this case, it's likely that she prefers she/her pronouns as she refers to herself as female. She might use "them" interchangeably as well, though.

[@narliehs1648]

​@@abeal49Having DID is unlikely to change what she refers to herself as, you know, unless an alter who prefers something else is in control. Take it from someone whose sister actually has it.

[@coreymartin6486]

"It's just a joke" is phrase that identifies a lot of bullies. They use it to try and excuse their actions.

[@smorphous8928]

Excuse me, how the hell is Op being extra, she had her day ruined because of her A-hole family laughing at her and her fiancée throwing cake at her. I’m surprised Op didn’t make a scene or downright screamed at everyone.

[@Zurround]

My wet dream fictional (though it might happen in real life) fantasy is for the wife to be a well trained martial artist, maybe a former competitor in women's MMA or kickboxing, something along those lines and for her to just BEAT THE CRAP out of her groom to the point where there is more blood on his face than there is cake on hers and when he gets served with the divorce papers he has to sign them while sitting up IN HIS HOSPITAL BED.

[@amberleeannalee1999]

Would have kneed him in the privates and smashed his head of my knee. That crap isn’t funny. They need a lesson

[@bloblovlalalulu3422]

That feeling of disappointment , it probably made her too numb to scream or get angry

[@Kayenne54]

I would have ... ended up in jail lol. Or on a video of "weddings from hell". He would have CRAWLED into that darned cake to escape my wrath.

[@cmsxcb]

Story 1: Again, this is about trust. OP told him what would happen if he did it, he swore he wouldn't, he did it anyway and, surprise, OP did what she said she'd do.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

Oh my gosh! Poor OP............ she DID NOT deserve any of the pain and abuse she received from her family, especially her mother. And that ex-husband sucks big time too. This is one of those stories where everyone and I mean EVERYONE sucks here. The only people who DON'T suck are OP and her true friends. What a sad mess. 😒

[@joshuawells7415]

The thing that sucks the most is that this douche waited until he would be an ex husband instead of an ex fiance.

[@madambutterfly1997]

Realistically, a lasting loving relationship isn’t entirely 50-50. Sometimes you’re gonna have to carry the 80% when your partner only has 20%. There will be times you wearing you only have 40% and your partner is going to have to pull that missing 60% and then on those rare occasions where your combined total is less than 100% you come together and figure out what works and what necessary changes you need to make in the relationship.

[@crem-crem4070]

Story 1: I haven’t listened to it but I already know that this is the kind of situation my father genuinly fears because, quote, “you (me, his daughter) are spiteful enough to not tell your partner you’re in labor until after the baby is born and named if they’ve wronged you in some way” And he’s absolutely right cause he raised me to have boundaries Edit: having listened to the story now I’m so grateful for the father and family I have, my dad would have been the one helping me pack up if I had a partner like this.

[@domgeek5632]

You and your father sound like smart people.

[@Empress58]

Charlotte Dobre would approve of this level of petty 😂

[@stephenaris2072]

So my wife almost did that to me at our wedding, but I grabbed her hand and whispered “if you do this, I’ll annul our wedding”. She then put the cake down and we had a great time

[@daiymohermitaurenjoyer9160]

Did she apologise for almost doing so?

[@nataliazakula3400]

My SIL was with a POS for too long. Then I found out through his cousin that he’d humiliated his first wife the same way at their wedding. These jerks never change, they are only self-centered and many get off on cruelty.

[@PinkMarshmallows]

At my wedding, my mom told my husband and I that we shouldn't be smashing cake in each other's faces, as she paid good money for my dress and his tux (she paid for the whole wedding, God bless her). And ya know what, we didn't, because we respected my mom and each other. And if my husband did go against mine and my mom's wishes, we wouldn't be together. 13 yrs and still going strong. Edit: For story 2, don't use Zillow. Almost all of the house listings on there are already sold, and OP is NTA.

[@Empress58]

Story 2: so OP’s fiancée would rather call her a gold digger, put the blame and burden on her, than just be honest about their finances??

[@yukiotacon2846]

The moment OP talked about her history with Cake smashing it was pretty clear she is not the asshole. I don't see how cake smashing is funny. Just imagining someone getting their face covered in frosting without consent makes my blood boil. Like the fact OP got hurt during her last cake smashing should have stopped there

[@jaimedritt4622]

I've seen brides cry after their new husbands have done this to them, though it didn't destroy the marriage. I just don't see why some people want to start off their marriage by humiliating their spouse. From a practical standpoint, staining the gown could prevent the bride from passing it down to any future children or other friends and family.

[@Russman67]

So OP is "Extra" because she told the husband not to smash cake in her face and gave him a real reason (parents thought it was funny to smash cake in her face) not to do it. He did it anyway. 🤔 And she's extra and emotional. Well here's hoping the points he scored with her family were worth being single AGAIN days later. 🤦‍♀️ Screw all these people.

[@fallingawayfromthenorm]

Story 1 - NTA. The people around OP suck, her mother, her husband, their families, etc. People have taken cake smashing at weddings and other parties way too far, at this point we need to leave it to infants given their own mini cake to wreck on their first birthdays because everyone else is ridiculous. Glad she’s getting an annulment, he’s not worth it.

[@spaceunicorn6000]

(2nd story) Holy cheese, please do not marry this man. Nobody pointed it out, but he only brought up wanting you to pay for half, and then got pissy with you for having legitimate solutions, is because he knew you couldn't pay half. He already knew that. He didn't actually want solutions, and he didn't want you to pay 50/50. He wanted you to grovel and worship him for shoving this expensive lifestyle in your face that you never asked for, and when you showed you could easily live without it (because you actually love him and not material BS), he sulked like a spoiled child and didn't want to play this game anymore. Any man who can hide something like this from you, give you ultimatums while refusing to be open and honest, and believe whatever BS his family cooks up about you that makes HIM look like the victim, (in spite of everything he knows about you as a person).. Yeah. Please heed the red flags and steer clear. The bridge is out.

[@AtorrisVsChadinel]

Women need to be more aware and intolerant of this behavior. We’re waaay too forgiving and it always resurfaces.

[@damien678]

Yep!! And him not telling her he's stressed out because of his own fuck-ups financially... and taking out his frustration about his short-comings on her...

[@michaelwoods3651]

Story 1- op told him her feelings and boundaries, which he proceeded to ignore. If he could violate her trust at their special day, what else would he do?!? Good on her for ending it!

[@aduckofsomesort]

How is OP spoiled and unrealistic for using a car her well off partner gave her? She literally said she is willing to sell everything and live on less. She was literally making a plan to live on less.

[@robertx8020]

Because some ppl are haters and allways need to be against the OP A lot of reflecting I guess?

[@cielbie8251]

Because she's a woman living outside her means, therefor must be spoilt.

[@ndawn90]

Yeah, that comment was stupid. I once read an article written by a woman who was driving a Jaguar to the WIC to get government assistance, and people were judging her, but it turns out that she and her husband were victims of the 2008 financial crash, combined with them giving birth to twins and the medical bills that came with that, and they ended up losing their jobs and homes and everything. She kept driving the Jaguar because it was fully paid off, it was new and didn't need repairs, and financially selling the Jaguar at a massive financial loss (cars depreciate in value like crazy) and buying a beater that would need regular repairs and isn't as safe for their children to be in is silly. IIRC, they eventually got their jobs back and rebuilt their lives, but for a time they needed help and they took it, all while people who had no idea what they went through were looking down their noses at them. Basically, don't judge, because you don't know.

[@robertx8020]

@@ndawn90 We had the same 'issue' at the foodbank (where I used to work as a volunteer for a while ) Were a woman showed up in a new Mercedes to get her food ..ppl complained to us that she was cheating the system, until they were told it was her friend's Mercedes (leased from work), who drove her because she had no other means of transportation! But noooo...she drove an expensive car, therefore 'foul play". As if our organisation didn't check her income before giving food out /s

[@rubymeaddle]

Because the internet would rather assume and attack than ask for clarifying information

[@LacquationsAceptance]

story 1: mother is the brat. Never ruin a cake. it is stupid that people do this. mother and new husband are being "extra" whatever it means. it is not a joke. it is disrespectful. they need to know this is wrong. and the "audience" need to stop laughing. dump the idiots.

[@stirrednotshaken4823]

Too bad OP couldn’t have, just once, smashed cake in her mother’s face. Her reaction would tell OP if mom really thought it was just a joke! I bet $100 that she would have a meltdown if someone did it to her. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@debl3063]

@@stirrednotshaken4823 especially if one of the cake decorations cut her face.

[@edalynclawthorne5877]

OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!! Seriously tho, it’s really sad just how hard people are groomed to settle for abuse. How they’re never shown true unbridled love and how it shapes them into accepting such poor treatment and being happy with it. Peoples, love yourselves, don’t subject yourselves to this

[@dimsufferer9951]

If she’s said “No, I don’t want that” “Please don’t do that” “I will leave you if you do that to me” over and over again, what did he *think* was going to happen? The make up that she spent a lot of money on? Ruined The dress she spent a lot of money on? Ruined The cake they spent a lot of money on? Ruined He just pissed hundreds of dollars down the drain because “tehe, I’m so funny”

[@ScreamingDucksShotMyMother]

You clearly didn’t grow up in an abusive household. It’s not settling for abuse, it’s being abused. Nice way to put the blame of being abused onto the victim though. You acknowledge people are groomed for this to happen, then just say “love yourself” you need to educate yourself a bit, there’s a reason it takes years to heal from an abusive household. The toxic positivity of “just love yourself” isn’t some easy little thing like you’re acting.

[@edalynclawthorne5877]

@@ScreamingDucksShotMyMothersorry, poor choice of worlds

[@gelasiakidd8076]

Story 2 makes me feel bad for everyone. Gifts being a love language and off psyche meds at the same time? Holy moly. I don't know if it's fixable, but I hope they can save enough for counseling. I still don't know if he's marriable, until he gets his shit in order. Maybe he will learn from it? He really needs more hand holding than a partner can provide right now. This is definitely crippling level issues and if he can't, then he may not have a job for very much longer. I'm very concerned for both of them, this is an incredibly unstable situation.

[@ShiNijuuAKL]

I doubt he would get his shit in order, but that's what OP can do for him, they might be compatible because she has what he doesn't. Everything could probably be fixed if she just start managing his finances completely. I would expect an adult to be able to do that, but the reality is that everyone has their weaknesses

[@AryonaSamoto]

Story 1: What a horrible family and now ex. I hope OP gets her stuff safely and gets far away from these abusers. I wish a future full of happiness and blessings❤ Story 2: I really don't think it's going to work out. The way the fiancee tried to put it all on OP and then called OP a gold digger is manipulative and toxic. Not to mention the financial trouble he put them in. I hope it works out for them but the fiancee has some serious work to do if he wants it to work.

[@robertx8020]

2. And I get so tired of ppl saying "just get a better paying job" ,,,Yeah because NO ONE ever thought about that and you ALWAYS have that option /s Who wants to bet ppl saying that either got a good job from a family member of never worked a day in their life?

[@tully6648]

@@robertx8020 Right? Like, "Yeah, you're right... I've been holding this better paying job in my back pocket, let me just bring it out now." And a new job wouldn't have solved the root of this problem anyway, because OP's guy was spending beyond their combined means to begin with.

[@cielbie8251]

Her fiancee found himself a saint of a woman, willing to put up with a man who put them both into debt without telling her, and then got himself into the manosphere and was beginning to blame her for the mess he got them in! And then repeatedly dodged the subject over and over, before starting a screaming match until finally saying the truth. I dont think he deserves how seriously tolerant she is. I can't imagine this lasting, and I think she deserves someone much better. I get he has issues, but it seems he views her as an opponant, not a partner.

[@robertx8020]

@@cielbie8251 Men (in this case, but ppl in general) don't know what they have and always need to blame others

[@robertx8020]

@@tully6648 Also this ..and NOT even telling her! A 'lesser OP ' would have dumped his ass

[@theseawriter]

A while ago I was posting about a stray kitten in my area I was trying to adopt. Recently, my sister and I have been able to pet him and pick him up! Hoping to take him to the vet soon, as he as an issue with his bottom. Update: He’s a she, and she’s fine now. She’s an inside kitten, who has recently taken to holding a toy in her mouth and parading around.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Aww poor baby

[@paulagoeringer9466]

I hope everything goes well 😸🐾💖

[@ScottyFang]

If it’s a problem with pooping and you’re not squeamish, cleaning his physical butthole, the ACTUAL butthole, with a warm washcloth may help :) like how momma cat cleans her babies, poop can dry up and close a kitten up to where they’re physically unable to poop and become blocked up

[@lindalehr1551]

Good luck! Hope you are able to get him.❤️🐱

[@MsUnamusedNerd]

STORY 1: I see this being a serious issue where brides will specifically tell her husband, even repeatedly for days upon weeks before the wedding “do not smash the cake in my face” and the husband to do it anyway “like, oh, my God, it’s just a cute little joke” If a bride has to spend 14+ days telling her husband do not do that to me and he doesn’t anyway that shows a clear lack of respect. If you cannot respect that simple boundary to his new bride on their wedding day shows he’s gonna disrespect her throughout their marriage over whatever he wants. If she does not want cakes made in her face, then don’t do it. The husband in the party guys might be laughing but she’s gonna get upset because she did not want cake smash in her face. Ruining her dress. Or getting in her hair. I can’t get over the background information, It’s really messed up how Mom calls OP a brat for getting upset when Mom promise not to smash her head into the cake and once again, one of the cake on my sliced, open her for head, causing substantial bleeding. That woman lied to her daughter and injured her for the sake of a cheap laugh, and still calls her brat over it. Pranks that involve humiliating or just overall provoking a negative emotion out of the person you’re a “pranking” is not funny or cute. Especially when it’s too just get a muse meant for other people who are spectating while giving yourself a cheap laugh

[@jaimedritt4622]

And also, pranks that actually harm people, like cutting someone's head open, are not funny and possibly criminal.

[@bigbucketlist]

I absolutely love pranks, but the things is, they should be FUN. That's the whole point of them. They should be unexpected and make the person giggle, preferably like a tickled kid. If humiliating, it should be within the persons boundaries. Like making a lunchbox for your partner when you know they will eat with others, and make sausages shaped like little squids. Buy them stupid socks and sneak them in their drawer. Taping little faces, capes or hats to all their toiletries and and placing them like a scene from their favorite movie. Of course "fun" means totally different things for people, and other people might like rougher pranks, but you have to be very good at reading the person you prank before you go ahead. I love the mild pranks, and I'm about to have a giggle fit everytime I open the shopping list me and my partner share on our phones and it says "milk, bread, four live halibuts, coffee, bananas (for the cake), eight kilos of assorted illegal narcotics, flour, shredded coconut".

[@thedandywarlocks3996]

My exhusband kept telling me he was doing to do it and I threatened to kick him in the nuts in front of everyone if he did. He did not.

[@damien678]

​@@bigbucketlist I'm totally not taking notes, or anything... 👀

[@damien678]

​@@thedandywarlocks3996 Good!!! Don't you lose that fighting spirit

[@MarkNarrations]

Hey hey my cheeky so and so's hope you're having a wonderful day thus far!!

[@FriedaMMartin]

This weekend went well as I sold a lot of stuff. Time to craft for more markets

[@megnotmegan1966]

We are now!❤

[@astralloser1177]

significantly improved with wedding drama straight from the Mark himself! hope everyone in the comments is doing well and thriving 💜

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Hope you are too mark 💜💜🤗🤗

[@monicacurtis3986]

I only had to tell my husband ONCE that I didn't want cake smashed in my face and HE LISTENED! One of MANY reasons I love him. I will never understand why some people refuse to listen to their partners.

[@immasnakeee6460]

Why do these men insist on embarrassing the woman they love so bad It’s disgusting. NTA, he got everything he deserved

[@Allmightyimortal]

Women do it to. Also, remember that tiktok crap a few years ago where people were smashing their partners electronic stuff to replace it with something new. One of those popped up on reddit and destroyed a relationship as well, the victim in that was a man, the smasher was his ex gf. Plus her own mother did it as well. So maybe we should say everyone should stop doing it and leave the sexism out of this.

[@aga3852]

@@Allmightyimortal Women can do it for sure, but the differences of how many men and women do it is VERY big. Like, if everyone agrees it is funny and okay to do in occasions (which you can and should always verify more than once), then okay. Everyone consented. But otherwise, do not ruin things people spend MONTHS worrying about.

[@ScreamingDucksShotMyMother]

@@AllmightyimortalIt’s not sexist to point out males like to humiliate their wives. There isn’t nearly the same amount of women doing this to their husbands.

[@Artem2034]

I say its only acceptable if they discuss it beforehand and get mutual consent. Otherwise yeah, its an AH move.

[@Allmightyimortal]

@ScreamingDucksShotMyMother have never met a man who did it so unless you have proof not coming from reddit than yes it is. That would just be stereotype. It's like someone saying something about Asian women drivers because one had an accident. It's wrong and takes away from the actual conversation.

[@patty-pat-pat]

He was counting on having her toxic family as a backup to abuse her. The wedding was just the warming up.

[@evavargas5826]

I just had a flashback moment with the first story. I never expected to need a trigger warning about cake smashing. My ex-husband smashed cake in my face on our wedding day. There was no fight or anything, but I should've known at that moment that the marriage wasn't going to last. We were so different. I have never liked the whole cake smashing thing and for him and his family it's a funny "tradition". My stomach was in knots the whole time Mark was reading the story.

[@tailsimp]

Story 1: I'm stuck on OP's 17th birthday and her being called a brat over her mother *slicing her face when pushing her face into a cake.* Just. Jesus Christ.

[@utha5034]

Second story: if she has to “take the reins” as OP stated, HE is going to be resentful at some point, probably as soon as he doesn’t get his way. I think they should downsize, etc. THEN she should leave him, because it’s not going to work long term with his views, he’s knee-jerk reaction towards her, and his family. If he’s having money issues, I’m sure he could have gone to mommy and have them solve it, but instead, he attacks his future wife?

[@faeriefire78]

I keep seeing videos of grooms physically overpowering their brides during a struggle to smash cake into their face, with the bride stunned or crying afterward. Can this trend die now? That whole story was enraging.

[@thehawkseye3412]

Trend will die if the brides start calling cops on the groom for assault and cops take action ( and not try to trivialize it) . Not before that.

[@Lady0Grayson]

"How did you not realize you were being abused?" You don't. Part of the abuse is that you don't realize it. You just think it's normal, so you can protect yourself. If you think it's normal, then you don't suffer thinking how you are trapped and can't escape, you just think that's how it is and endure it, without living trap in a cage and wanting out thoughts.

[@tully6648]

Especially when your abusers tell you over and over again that you're just being emotional and dramatic, and tell anyone else the same thing whenever you get upset. You can feel that you're crying for a good reason, but if everyone around you is calling you silly for doing so, then you WILL believe that you're crying because you're "too sensitive." It happens.

[@aselyne5631]

You do realize, because it feels very bad inside when it happens, you just ignore it because you "love them"

[@aselyne5631]

​​@@tully6648 You being in a negative emotional state because of their actions should be a sign that you deep down you know it's abuse . Trust me people know when they are being abused its feels bad,brings you negative emotions,some cry,feeling un heard that doesn't come because of they are treating is nicely,it's abuse and we know it.

[@thehawkseye3412]

"You just think it's normal, so you can protect yourself.If you think it's normal, then you don't suffer thinking how you are trapped and can't escape, you just think that's how it is and endure it,"... that's so true...

[@sgtjarhead99]

Don't ever let your spouse disrespect you. It only leads to them doing whatever the hell they want with no fear of consequences.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Overreacting, emotional. These are common talking points people use to invalidate women from feeling their feelings. He's a good man? A good man would never publicly do something you specifically told him you hate. ETA I hadn't heard the cheating part, but all this is on brand. Someone who will publicly humiliate you, definitely has been disrespecting you in other ways. How did OP waste HIS time when he was cheating and wanted to leave her?? TF? Several years of therapy are in order before OP considers dating again. I'm glad she has the awareness to see she shouldn't jump into anything right away

[@LetholdusKaspyr]

They're common talking points BULLIES use to invalidate VICTIMS. It's not about women specifically. I know several men who have been victims of this, usually from women.

[@paulagoeringer9466]

She needs to be as far away as possible from all those toxic crap stains.

[@ACAB.forcutie]

Sounds like not a single person in OP's life values her :/

[@WheresTheMoneyLebowski]

Lol y’all so butthurt over a piece of cake😂

[@LetholdusKaspyr]

@@WheresTheMoneyLebowski Probably spent thousands of dollars on the dress, makeup, and hair to look perfect on their wedding day, only to have it all ruined in front of everyone for some cheap, stupid giggles at her expense. Hope the dress wasn't rented, because she's not getting that deposit back. Also, she set a boundary that she felt strongly about, and he laughed as he crossed it. She's not going to be listened to for the rest of the relationship. Her feelings aren't important to him. Screw that guy.

[@Davtwan]

No family is better than a bad family. I hope OP makes her own with good friends and a great husband.

[@musetorn]

Get an annulment and make him earn his way back to the registrar. He knew this was a thing for you and he knew how big a day this was for you.

[@luna_rain2521]

A few years ago I had to do a quick change during a break with hair and makeup during my shift as a caregiver because a 90ish year old lady had asked me to be a bridesmaid, it's never too late to find someone if that's what you want.

[@LetholdusKaspyr]

Story 2: This guy has zero financial maturity. OP is being way too generous, taking on the debt and the debt generator too. How can you accuse a woman of being a gold digger if she responds to a push to change the finance situation by drawing up a new budget plan that she's fine with living by?

[@slimecorn]

Lol I’ve already told my fiancé cake smashing = instant annullment. He thinks it’s fucked up anyways.

[@sharonbroadbent8138]

Story 2 - He finally told her the truth, he has money hang ups due to a toxic family and was too embarrassed to admit they were in debt. She's willing to give him a chance, I can understand why. There is nothing worse than being left with What If's.

[@fordstang92]

I never did understand the smash cake thing. When my wife and I got married we did the frosting on our lips. (We both agreed)An kissed. Our son's when they got married their fiancees both wanted to do it also. So now our families (so far 20 weddings) have done it. Of course with permission of course from their partners

[@blackivy7582]

Hey, just a friendly PSA here. Cake smashing can be dangerous. Some cakes can have hidden supports straws/cardboard rings/wooden dowels in them. Especially if they have lots of tiers or weight to them. Those things? They can seriously injure someone. There's been cases of those things puncturing people's faces/eyes/ect. Maybe just don't cake smash for safety purposes, but ESPECIALLY not if your partner says no.

[@user-blob]

This is what happens when society dictates that we should all be in a relationship. It’s not always the smart move for certain people or at certain times in their lives.

[@panicattheanimationstudio5673]

Story 1: fun fact, most weddings planners and whatnot say that a man smashing cake against his new wife's face without her consent is a good indicator that they'll end up divorced

[@alyzu4755]

Wow! OP is so much better off without him, his family, and her own family. Especially her mother. 🙄 Better to be alone than with any of those awful excuses for human beings. It does seem as if OP was so used to abuse that it was normal for her. I wish her all the best and hope she finds happiness. Story 2: Good on OP! She's not manipulating him, she's being real: This is what she can afford. If he can't handle that, that's on him, not her. Update: Hoo boy. I hope he can get back on his meds and they can get their lives back, either together or separately.

[@caridadchang7895]

story 1:every single tread that wedding staff (catering, photography, flowers, etc) is full of them mentioning how cake smashing is a warning sign that a divorce is coming. story 2: not shocked that this is happening, people used to having money dont know how to ration it when they are on their own

[@kiera2867]

In story two, it sounds a little like op feels she owes him because he went off his meds “for her”. But it wasn’t for her, it was for him. He didn’t want to have a hard conversation with her so he did what he could to keep hiding it from her. I think that’s probably why he was being so mean too. And to try and put blame on her like that just spells bad to me. I hope it works out, that’s so shitty.

[@gigglingchaos1795]

The one day, the ONE DAY it is a given that you do not practical joke someone is on their wedding day. She told them all what would happen, she gave them her boundaries and they danced all over them. If he would do that, what else would he do?

[@JB-ov9lf]

The part where the mother and family say "you will be alone" reply with "Alone is better than surrounded by fools". By leaving it shows she is in need of a better class of people. The hubs saying that he wanted to impress the family says it all. He only wants to impress others and doesn't actually love her. Good job on walking away from a future life of TOTAL HELL!

[@aprilarlidge2807]

OP 1 dodged a bullet. I could see him doing this over and over again - every anniversary and birthday. He will also never apologize.

[@tully6648]

You can be him and her family would be teaching the kids all sorts of "fun pranks" to play on her, too. "It's okay to laugh; mommy's just being dramatic."

[@ivorynk752]

I used to think that the cake smashing thing was a cute subversion of the cake feeding, because I was under the assumption it was something both parties planned to do to each other, not something one surprised the other with.

[@GoldenXBoots]

My day is going well. Currently listening while resting on my coach before I pick up our kids from daycare after the check at the midwife today. Baby #3 and I are doing well. 💛. Have a good day, everyone!

[@BruinPhD2009]

Ooh, new baby! I wish you and all your family nothing but the best. 😊

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Glad the day and the baby are going well 💜💜🤗🤗

[@undeadladybug7723]

I don't know what's worse about the first OP's mom, the fact she literally MADE HER DAUGHTER BLEED with that cake smashing shit, or that her mom *still* blames OP for the aftermath. What the absolute fuck. Everything else is just more toppings on the shit sundae. Glad OP got out of that toxic waste dump. Also, the new sprites are freaking adorable.

[@MiddayLady]

I am honestly amazed at how dramatic some abusers can be. They slowly cook the frog, eroding their SO's expectations of what is acceptable and normal, and then one day - BAM. A huge power move. This is what he did - he waited for their wedding day, and in front of everyone, when he truly thought he had her (already married! social pressure to laugh it off) he made his power move. It was supposed to re-set the relationship, to put forth the new, even WORSE, more abusive norms that were beginning from now on. And they do that a lot! Reddit is stock full of horror stories of botched on-purpose wedding proposals or engagement rings that were obviously selected to upset the woman (she hates diamonds and silver, and round ring and ask repeatedly for ANYTHING but that, and it's a round diamond set in silver - stuff like that. It happens more often than you think) - all power moves in that pivotal moment. It's scary but also kind of fascinating. It's also absolutely the moment to run, but a lot of people stay, because of the time invested, and because the moment itself puts pressure on them to stay. Which, of course, is part of the plan. It's all very strategic.

[@peggyseabrun4829]

OP, sad as it turned out, big props to you girl. You stood your ground, you refused to be manipulated nor intimidated. You saw through the bullshit, you kept your digjity and most of all your SELF RESPECT. I pray there is a strong ,respectful , LOVING man out there for you. Take care of yourself, love yourself, be happy and remain the badass you are. Oh and ask the police to go with you to keep the peace.

[@SPN-Raptor]

I'm not even done with the cake story but holy sh-t!! The mom called her a "brat" on her 17th, after causing HER DAUGHTER TO BLEED. Then the (I hope) ex-husband...jfc. I can't. No means no ffs

[@kaedehara2353]

I love how her husband and her family ignored her feelings and did something to her without consent and act like they did nothing wrong!

[@thekameru6058]

Fuck that I'd be furious too. Aint no-one going to smush a cake into my face other than me.

[@sophdog2564]

I usually listen to these while I get ready for the day. On Tuesdays and Thursdays though, I ride on the train early early to get to school (2.5 hour commute!)

[@AndyyWithAY]

All I can think about is these recent cake smashing videos. OMG it's about that 😱 I've heard this one before. NTA. I'd get this anulled. This seems minor, but this is a blatant disregard for her boundaries. Don't stay for someone who disrespects you. Imagine someone like this as a parent. Her having trauma makes it so much worse

[@AJ-qe5xj]

I’m not a person who gets mad easy or gets over the top mad, but one of the fastest ways to put me in that state is to smash cake in my face… something about the mess in my hair and ruining my makeup and the stickiness just really puts me over the edge. That would be a hard boundary at my wedding,,, absolutely no cake smashing.

[@kellypatterson8506]

Should have walked over to the priest and tore up the marriage certificate. Your not officially married until paperwork is filed.

[@Raggmopp-xl7yf]

S1: Boy, OP dodged a bullet here. Thank goodness her (ex)husband turned out to be a complete jerk. He was so intent on his prank he inadvertently showed her what her future would be like and what a nightmare that would have been. S2: I like her realistic approach to his request. If I need to pay half then we need to live within MY means instead of yours. The update was a surprise. Her fiance was a fool to live so far above his means. I hope he can live in the real world and not in this fantasy he's created for himself.

[@paulastiles5507]

Story #1: Cake smashing is potentially extremely dangerous. OP has personal experience with this thanks to her narcissistic abuser of a mother. OP straight-up sets this boundary with her fiance. Fiance then POLE-VAULTS right on over that boundary, intentionally humiliates her in public and in front of her psychopathic family, and when she does exactly as promised and leaves, insults her and calls her "emotional." Admittedly, he was already throwing off huge red flags by forcing her to invite her nutjob relatives, whom he seemed more interested in bonding with than her, but she can be forgiven for not seeing right away that she accidentally married someone just like her family. When the actual boundary got crossed, she stood up and showed that shiny bright spine. Keep running, girl. Calling that Uber was the smartest thing you ever did. Cap it off with an annulment. After the updates: Annnnnd of course he'd been cheating on her. At least she's got some ride-or-die friends who are backing her up. I agree about the therapy rec. It will help. When she goes over to get her stuff, she *needs* to bring a cop.

[@JennRighter]

Of course we latch onto what resonates with us. When OP said her mom told her she’d always be alone because she can’t take a joke. I think about my mom saying no man would ever want to be with me because I’m sick (autoimmune disorder). One of the hundreds of cruel things my mom said to me. She said that specific thing when I was 27 and close to death, I’m not exaggerating. I was on a leave of absence from work, all of my internal organs were swollen, I couldn’t eat and was severely underweight and legit close to death and I had no one. My mom said I was being irresponsible and was going to lose my job and no man would ever want to be with me like this. I’m 43 but I will always, always remember this forever. When I needed someone, anyone, when I was the most terrified, I tried to tell my mom. And this is what she said to me.

[@natsukxshii]

i love listening to your videos as i’m falling asleep, it’s 8am and i’ve ruined my sleep schedule so i’ve been watching newly uploaded videos to sleep lol

[@amyjames7760]

First story he gave you a gift. The gift of knowing he doesn't give a s*** about you, your feelings, or your boundaries. I hope you have the wedding you really want someday

[@telinhajp]

Good afternoon, Mark and Poppy! Wishing that you both be happy and healthy! ❤️🤗

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗

[@chrisfitzsimmons6428]

I don't care who they are, Anyone that ruins a good cake deserves jail time. Years, not months.

[@meganb.higgins973]

That which is done in the dark will be brought to the light. I hope OP has a swift and easy annulment and a happy life.

[@peculiarpossum7149]

"He's now saying that I'm being unfair and manipulative, and that he tried to come to me with a serious concern about our relationship and I;m making it impossible for him to talk to me, and bulldozing over him." Give him his own words back. This is how it's going to be. Take it or leave it.

[@abvhrulz]

If a family does the cake smashing BS I can’t believe they put stuff in the cake that could cut someone. A person could loose a damn eye.

[@dimsufferer9951]

Like dowels put in tiered cakes

[@abvhrulz]

@@dimsufferer9951 exactly! It’s so dangerous.

[@paulqueripel3493]

I hope the candle at 17 wasn't burning. Lose, not loose.

[@alm6542]

Stories like the first one are the reason I won’t even have a cake in my wedding. Just little desserts for people to choose and enjoy.

[@lorrainemontagnon1537]

Good morning guys! Just chilling out and enjoying a large cup of coffee. Rock on Mark!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Have a good day💜💜🤗🤗

[@lauriemeisterhans9463]

Cake smashing: At our reception, as we were cutting the cake, we both decided NOT to do the cake smash, even though others were calling for it. We both wear gasses, so that's a factor. We both think/thought it was a stupid idea. We've been married over 25 years now.

[@chamomileandcosmos471]

When someone says not to do something over and over and over again, especially with good reason, and the other person does that thing, it literally fills me with rage. Good on OP for prioritizing her boundaries rather than just accepting that treatment. And thank goodness she did, as it turns out getting out of that marriage ended up being a HUGE bullet dodged aside from that major breach of trust and boundaries!

[@atlus6412]

Story 2 : I hope Op and her fiance can get through this hard time together. She sounds like a nice and faithful person.

[@dimsufferer9951]

KZbin: This video has 5 comments “Can is see them?” KZbin: No :)

[@ErisstheGoddessofmanhwas]

Some people don't understood that traumas are real with some peoples.

[@catsncrows]

Mark "wasting cake😢" I second that. This cake smashing thing has got to stop, I've seen videos where it gets really violent and the bride gets knocked to the floor. I'd lose my crap and he'd be wearing the rest of the cake and I'd leave. Edit my therapist told me if I was ever in trouble an uber would be faster than the police. She's right, I've had them show up in minutes (More than once I've dealt with a late night bus stop creeper)

[@spaceunicorn6000]

It's so hard, and feels scary and insufferable, when you think you've found someone who will finally be there for you; and you realize they're just as bad as your family. And more, that you probably ended up with this person, just because you've been mistreated for so very long, you don't even notice it until it gets THAT bad.

[@susanlosey9511]

OP, the reason you didn’t realize you were being abused, is because you’ve been abused all your life. You were use to it all your life.

[@jccw227]

I’ve seen on several askreddit threads where wedding planners say the “cake smashing” bit is usually the telltale sign of where the marriage is going to go