I Taught My Goldfish to Play Elden Ring

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I connected elden ring to my goldfish's fish tank. Can he take down some of video game's hardest bosses?
This was streamed live on Twitch: / pointcrow
▶UNEDITED STREAM FOOTAGE HERE: • Goldfish Plays Elden Ring
POINTCROW
▶TWITCH: / pointcrow
▶MERCH: collectorsanxiety.com
▶VOD Channel: / pointcrowvods
▶Twitter: / pointcrow
▶Discord: / discord
▶Instagram: / pointcrow
Artwork/Emotes by Lycel, SSSucrose, AbbyBagel
Editted by:
/ verytiredkat
#pointcrow #eldenring #gaming

[@PointCrow]

THATS MY BOY

[@0ctagon]

thats ur boy

[@Gooby_woooby]

Love your vids

[@trick130o5]

NOOO! MY BOY!

[@johncox8527]

I guess he succeeded

[@Omner-xg5kl]

Goodnight pointcrow

[@Jetaru]

It'll never not be funny to me that a fish broke Crows PC entirely.

[@Kronos0999]

ACTHUALLY it was bad code.

[@jemsuper]

What was the actual reason why his computer broke anyways?

[@freyjadunlin]

​@@jemsupergraphics card issues as he mentioned. I think some neural networks take advantage of the GPU, so it's probably just a case of his computer not being up to spec

[@Jetaru]

@@jemsuper My guess is the program interfered with the graphics drivers in a way that caused severe corruption but then again it seemed like it sustained physical damage which I have no idea how that would happen.

[@DDoodles_]

@@Jetaruonly if you have that little coding knowledge

[@KozyCL]

the fact that only like 67% of players beat Godrick and a goldfish is among them is insane. Even more so that he got Melenia to second phase without summons. He's better then most of us.

[@sted13]

I can't even godrick the omen

[@zombieindenial_]

Well he said he was geared with "typical" stuff youd find before that boss but that stuff is end game lol. Most players prolly dont have jack when thet get to that point.

[@Rith9789]

Summons might make it harder. Giving her more to heal off of.

[@deusex9731]

@@zombieindenial_ from a new player perspective yes, but the armour is easily obtained by just killing bernard on stormhill so its very easy to get

[@g.b.9799]

@@zombieindenial_ bernahl is at the warmasters shack at the beginning of the game and you get his armor if you kill him there, and the bloodhound fang is also easy to get, youre just wrong lmao and you got upset for no reason ofc a new player wouldnt know that playing blind but you could always look up a guide or have someone tell you, and besides thats detracting from the fact this is a fucking goldfish and this video and this comment are just in good fun, chill out lol

[@HelpImInTheVoid]

I like how tortellini was keep on healing when the boss was staggered. Then killed them as soon as they got up, thst was like a taunt lol💀

[@theobsessedgrimreaper7909]

Malenia: “Thy strength…. Extraordinary….” Tortellini: “blub blub blub blub”

[@Officewaffle]

The fact that google translate no longer considers "thy" to be english and tells me to let it translate it to "your" is infinitely hilarious to me

[@AstroGDev]

So real

[@HanJordo]

@@OfficewaffleI thought it was going to translate the goldfish speech to English…

[@bw9071]

​@@HanJordo imagine tho

[@Zer0Cares]

It didn't kill Melania. This is clickbait

[@misohappy1070]

I bet this goldfish is better than actual players.

[@CubingGamer13]

Fr

[@dinomon9812]

It's better than me I played elden ring for so long and I still haven't done more than like an hour's worth of progression.

[@rockstarz978]

As a person who doesn’t know how to play elden ring I can say that he is better than me 😂

[@DavidMartinez-be8wt]

Easiest dark souls i played but a goldfish without summons and no actual build is impressive

[@the1pomister641]

Probably

[@misteronionbro1022]

Can you set up an interview with Tortellini where chat asks him questions and he responds with various words in a grid like pattern? we need to know this fish's legendary backstory on his prowess at the art of elden ring.

[@thevalarauka101]

yes please

[@DylanSzerlip-ce2uw]

He must

[@mysticat]

#1 Tortellini Fan

[@GalaxyMonke8890]

👑

[@kierrific1357]

#2 Tortellini fan

[@OctoLinkYT]

Nah bro I gotta disagreee

[@sreeharigaddam752]

Hi mysticat

[@ProbablyBacon]

#3 Tortellini Fan

[@yaboishrimps]

The fact that Tortellini healed when it mattered most MULTIPLE TIMES in the Godrick fight just proves his actions were NOT by chance lmao

[@martingraham801]

He clowned on him, spamming his empty jug while he was staggered

[@Gideon-ofnir]

Queen Gibson is harder than godrick

[@Gideon-ofnir]

Gibdo

[@Gideon-ofnir]

He took me around 4 tries an gibdo like 6

[@Grayson-tk5hn]

@@Gideon-ofnirwhat

[@katoatoato]

Just incase you didn't see in other clips, the tank Tortellini is in is NOT his normal tank. They just needed a large empty tank to make tracking him easier.

[@cylan6337]

good to know! i was looking through the comments just to make sure, but thanks!

[@nightbringar7558]

Thank you so much for that info. I was hoping that it either wasn't his normal tank or that they took out all the enrichment for the stream

[@anthropomorphicpeanut6160]

Thank you! I was worried about this

[@jayemover_16]

I want to know what his normal tank looks like, what roommates Tortellini has and how it's decorated.

[@katoatoato]

@@jayemover_16 I don't remember if Crow showed a pic of his usual tank or not...

[@josiahgarber3761]

At first I thought “You kitted him out with such great weapons and armor!” Then I thought “A goldfish just beat Margit in less tries than it took me

[@theangrypotato2.031]

All of his gear is available before fighting those bosses. You just need to know where to look

[@masterfreeze1054]

Not only is this insanely cool, but it's wholesome. The fact that a person could have their own pet goldfish play video games is just sweet.

[@skiddly9235]

crow announcing, "My goldfish can play Eldin Ring!" like an evil scientist was probably the funniest thing I've seen my entire week.

[@megamaster3333]

“Convinced his master Eric to show twitch chat his feet” truly a masterpiece of writing

[@ThienTran-ct2yu]

119 likes and 0 comment. Let me fix that

[@conspicuouspigeons]

@@ThienTran-ct2yu 1 like and no replies. Let me fix that

[@Depuree]

​@@conspicuouspigeons5 likes and no replay? Let me fix that.

[@sydneykenaston740]

@@Depureeno likes and no reply?? Gimme a sec

[@benjamindenny6282]

@@sydneykenaston740 one like and no replies? No worries fam

[@tyujg7495.]

Everyone: ( Screaming and cheering after every accomplishment) Tortellini:

[@cwispyboigaming4992]

Never have I been more hyped seeing a fish play a game, and the significance of beating malenias first phase has tought us that no matter what, perseverance will always triumph. And that a fish is better at videogames than a journalist

[@wanderingbardgaming]

PointCrow: "I love Tortellini more than life." PointCrow during lie detection stream: "I'd eat him for $100K"

[@Axolotlaser]

Life is only worth $99 k

[@enriqueaquiahuatl8554]

There has been character development

[@wanderingbardgaming]

@@enriqueaquiahuatl8554 that's a great way to look at it actually

[@GhassanGhamdi]

If you eat tortellini for 100k, you'd have enough money to buy 16666 of them! MAY TORTELLINI TAKE THE WORLD

[@easymodegamer501]

@@GhassanGhamdi”Strike me down and I’ll become more powerful than you can imagine.” (Look idk the exact quote it’s been a while.)

[@UntitledGoosse]

This truly proves that elden ring is a totally easy, relaxing experience.

[@Yinithyn]

nah, this proves that golfish are the supreme evolution. they can trad stocks, play games, and commit credit card fraud.

[@noahpleau6289]

Tortellini wasting heals just to flex before landing the death blow was just too cinematic 11:40

[@bugbbear]

Fun fact! The lab I work in uses this kind of fish-tracking technology to study the effect of different compounds we make. Cool to see it used for this kind of thing!

[@terrivel11]

If I remember correctly, a fish also discovered a landmark speed run glitch in a game that changed the face of speed runs in that game dramatically.

[@brendanhall5581]

The one that played Pokémon Sapphire, I think? Might've been the same fish setup that committed credit card fraud but I'm pretty sure there are multiple Fish Plays Pokémon out there

[@terrivel11]

@@brendanhall5581 Might have been, I'm not sure, though I'm pretty sure it WAS Pokemon of some sort. The owner left for a few minutes, and when she came back, she found the fish had performed some sort of major new skip.

[@Izzatasquid]

@@brendanhall5581never in my life did I think I would read a sentence such as this. What a world we live in. 😂

[@LunaTulpa]

@@terrivel11 while the fish did find a glitch, it doesn't have any use in speedruns. all the glitch is that it dupes a boulder using HM strength

[@jerryb216]

​@LunaTulpa It doesn't help the speedrun yet* Honestly it might never actually be used in a run but it wouldn't be the first time a glitch/skip was found that was useless at the time but ended up being really important later on.

[@a-zfamilyadventures9310]

Bro imagine training your entire life and you go against the player just to be beat by a goldfish 😂

[@Oceane1803]

7:30 The fact that they made it rhyme as an actual poem makes me laugh so hard 😂

[@Fem_Witch]

Tortellini not only defeated godrick, but insulted him too.

[@AceAlbatros]

The real flex would be if your goldfish summoned “let me solo her”

[@ThienTran-ct2yu]

205 likes and 0 comment. Let me fix that

[@eldenarchonofcinder2036]

The real REAL flex would be if the goldfish became Let Me Solo Her.

[@CouragelessOne]

Pointcrow: Screaming Tortellini: 🐟🎵Life could be a dream🎵

[@tyujg7495.]

Or eating his own shit from the floor

[@arthaswilliams9414]

9:58 Tortellini just drinks all the flasks

[@theperfectbotsteve4916]

bro that fish is a better player than i am

[@papasmurf02]

I love how every time tortellini's destroying eldritch horrors that may very well be some of the strongest beings to walk the earth, he's just staring at a rock or at the ceiling LOL

[@nicholaspeters9919]

And with that, I think I’ve finally begun to understand Shonen anime protagonists.

[@agencymenace1090]

​@@nicholaspeters9919Yuji Itadori is definitely a fish mentally.

[@eugeniopalladino5793]

Imagine the Two Fingers examining the Greater Will and discovering that a fish is predestined to become Elden Lord

[@Chaosattractor225]

This is so funny to think about😂😂😂

[@Cirex2118]

He literally puts his whole body into this gameplay, Fish gameplay is insane.

[@radiontherooftimeooo233]

That was such a nicely made, edited and just NICE video! Really enjoyed it! Thanks :3

[@Squiddy609]

11:35 i now imagine tortellini taunts bosses by pretending to drink healing potions

[@theredlumas2]

“Blub blub blub blub. (Hey, Godrick! Look at my drink!)

[@BirdMoose]

Considering the memory of a goldfish, Tortellini might be the first thing to ever beat Malenia and not remember her name

[@Lazy-Lizard]

That's a myth. Goldfish have pretty good memory and can get depressed.

[@Ganonussyszestygorillagrip]

Goldfish have great memory, people are just stupid.

[@TsubasayaYami]

Also I beg to differ that he would be the only one that doesn't remember her name, going by how many ppl write her name wrong

[@shurno1588]

​@@TsubasayaYamiYeah it's incredible how many people don't know her name is melitonin , the blade of michelin.

[@TsubasayaYami]

@@shurno1588 That's what I'm talking about! Her name is Malochondria and she is the powerhouse of the lands between!

[@zachbrewer1373]

Elden Ring bosses: I fear no man, but that thing?? *points at Tortellini* Elden Ring bosses: it scares me

[@LendinSwiftbolt]

Lovely video, loved all the music choices, too. Had the biggest smile on my face seeing Tortellini fight with Twilight of the Gods in the background. Keep up the good stuff!

[@sp10482]

Ok, now this is probably one of his best-edited videos till now, no doubt!

[@artangelfae]

real!

[@ArtzyZero]

I've never been so emotionally invested in the actions of a goldfish before.. also "I watched a goldfish play Elden Ring today" is not something I ever saw coming.

[@Battlesny]

The flex of healing nothing several times while the boss is both an inch from death and staggered.😂

[@plarfee]

He used ghost trick sound at the beginning.that game deserves more❤❤❤

[@GoldieBoBoldie]

1:00 the fact that dougdoug has hardwired my brain so now whenever I see "trials and tribulations" I immediately think of pajama sam is.....indescribable

[@DIVECRAFTGAMER]

-Pajama Sam (AI voice)

[@Gameboy-2007-yt]

I think oh phoenix wright

[@thegamerFOX45]

wowie that gold fish has some moves, the skilled players are shivering because tortellini was calm and confident the entire time. worth a diamond medal

[@artorias6969]

How tf is a goldfish better at Elden Ring than me

[@katana_on_a_keychain]

Game journalists been real quiet since this dropped

[@billybobjoe7527]

Eric: ”Malenia is one of the hardest bosses in the history of video games, made to challenge the skill of the greatest players…” Tortellini: ez

[@glauberglousger6643]

Never underestimate Goldfish, that’s when they’ll strike 3 second memory? Myth Dumb? Myth All myths

[@gabriellondon5882]

They can also live for 20-30 years with proper care

[@pidj.]

This message written by a goldfish

[@lewishallam9924]

Bad at Elden Ring? Myth

[@alchemysaga3745]

Those may be myths, but Tortellini is a Legend.

[@anthonyciero82]

Eric: you finally beat godrick now go fight malenia Tortellini: 🐠

[@rosj1861]

Never watched this guy before but I need more goldfish gaming please, also tortellini deserves some high quality fish food for this!!

[@retrosaurusrx]

Goldfish are secretly taking over the gaming scene.

[@joshuawittenborn9233]

Funny how crows fish is better at beating margit than himself with voice controls

[@nathancorum6126]

I appreciate you using “Battle of the gods” in the Godrick fight. Echoes had such a good soundtrack!

[@smolpeepee245]

This is absolutely insane. Truly golden content

[@pk-ni6wt]

Now you need to get a clownfish for a friend to play a multiplayer game (edit) thanks for 600 likes

[@pocarisweat_jp]

THIS

[@deeddles1]

that'd require an entirely different tank and setup, tho can't exactly be a friend when you die in each other's environment on default

[@UnConstant]

@@deeddles1what if we just cut the aquarium in half? ( like putting a border or smth ) . This is still a great idea tho!

[@kaleenar963]

This would be a fun idea, but it might have to be a different kind of fish I don’t think a clownfish would work.

[@maxwellworld7274]

wtf you found this vid before me?

[@red-pm1lg]

Crow: is this fish proof? The minimum wage worker who got him as a customer: what

[@eduardooliveira2890]

Apart from the little taps on the fishtank I had a blast with this one. Unhinged stuff there, congrats!

[@Blueflamez81]

Amazing! Keep up the great work!

[@tophat6]

the second he stepped into the pc store he became 10X funnier

[@jerrysanchez5453]

He's more proud of his goldfish then my parents have ever been of me lol

[@jackygemme863]

Did you beat Elden ring without limbs?

[@sketchyfile9132]

i am obsessed with the use of ghost trick music. thank you "pointcrow"

[@NathanielJamesProd]

This was extraordinary. Best documentary I've seen. 10/10

[@erelys3259]

I'm just speechless that this was an event that actually transpired.

[@Foggust]

Watched every fucking stream for this. Pure gold.

[@superplex25]

... fish.

[@Foggust]

Ba dum tshhh

[@dutchieplays]

You should play multiplayer with Tortellini!

[@CrepuscularBean]

the use of "an obstacle in our path" for malenia is great

[@unfortunatefish3322]

Please consider getting Tortellini some decor and hiding spots for his enclosure, and maybe even some friends! Fish are much more intelligent than people give them credit for and they can become depressed and bored if they don't have enough enrichment in their environment. I understand having a bare enclosure for an instance like this (needing the fish to be trackable) but otherwise there is no reason not to give him the best quality of life possible! (Also thanks for not using those bright rainbow rocks in his tank, they're not good at all.)

[@PointCrow]

he is extremely well taken care of! Had to remove all the enclosures for the tracker to work 👍 only lasted a couple hours at a time

[@pyritenightmare]

@@PointCrowSo glad to hear this! Hope you guys get to have even more fun in the future!

[@Cam_Ayy]

@@PointCrow YAYYY! He's gonna live a happy fishy life

[@Glace_cakes]

@@PointCrowfigured as much! How’s he doing now😊

[@humanperson9443]

@@PointCrowthis feels like a Doug Doug vid

[@squishyVMO]

Watching all of this live was insane. Tortellini is best fish. Do you think he could even play Zelda?

[@CJ-mk3nf]

Would you happen to know the date/name of the vod? I can only find the 40 min and 3 hour vods from a few months ago, and neither seems to be the main source of the footage in this video

[@zeke3620]

​@@CJ-mk3nfprolly on twitch

[@minnie6233]

You should try

[@jabiezook]

​@@CJ-mk3nfI think the stream was on twitch

[@GetoSuguruEdits]

If he beats ganondorf (totk) or builds a nuke with zonai cannons i would cry because even i struggled to beat gannon with a thick club fused with a silver boko horn

[@The_Mioman]

Best video I’ve ever seen, amazing accomplishment! Congratulations

[@Alex_192.]

1:59 OH NO THEY’RE GOING TO CONTROL THEIR WEAPONS WITH GOLDFISH!!!!

[@launsallee1300]

Tortellini was the best (non-human) elden ring player I’ve ever seen!

[@FuryJack07]

11:40 oh you don't understand. He wasn't trying to heal... He was taunting. He was like "i don't need to hit you while you're vulnerable, I'll kill you when you get back up" And that's exactly what he did. He waited for the bos to get up and start attacking, and only then he went for it. He knows what he did, and he did it for content.

[@orangescalefishy1258]

I’d recommend upgrading the tank size to a 30 gallon after he gets a bit older. These can get 7-8”

[@dylanlafrance]

Lololol! This was awesome good job little goldfish, you are truly the Elden Lord we need. I also just saw an American Dad episode where Klaus was also playing Elden Ring, totally killed me 😂😂😂

[@KoPtheReal]

Eric and hundrets of people watching at their screens screaming "Tortellini you can do it!". Tortellini: "Blub blub let me solo her first phase blub. Because some real people can't. Blub blub."

[@CubingGamer13]

Tortellini is so smart. I can't even beat those bosses. Edit: I can't belive I got 389 likes in one day. Tysm.

[@tyujg7495.]

Tortellini:

[@nicolasn12]

The fact a gold fish can play better than most(if not all) of us and beat the hardest boss of an game which is a thing most people cant do just impresses me, this just proves futher that my sister would lose to an gold fish(she sucks at video games sadly), next game shall be pikmin 2, soo this fight can really happen(through dolphin netplay offcourse)

[@starfydusty]

Not only is this an incredible feat of computer engineering, but it also looks like Tortilini has a tank that's gonna be nicely sized for him in the future. I love to see it.

[@hendini]

2:13 I remember this moment vividly. It was right after you and chat jammed out to “Tortellini,” you said “how am I supposed to follow that up,” and then Lini blubbed “you aren’t,” and Tortellinied your PC, ending stream himself and the life of that PC with it! The Tortellini saga is one that will live in legend (and my heart for a long time)! I don’t know of another goldfish with a theme song. 🎶 Tortellini, why you such a meanie? Blew my graphics card up so that my chat could not see me, NOPE… 🎶

[@Xander_13]

FINALLY IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS VIDEO FOR EVA

[@cherubin7th]

I knew it, Elden Ring is just a button smash version of Dark Souls.

[@gearzracing]

I think this is the literal best integration of a sponsor segment I have ever seen. Woo Micro Center! Felt like part of the video. :)

[@maddit_line]

This goldfish beat this challenge. But I still haven’t beaten Margit. That’s it, I’m out, I can’t- I can’t do this anymore

[@ravingtac0896]

You got this, just make sure not to panic roll on his attacks, a lot of them are delayed

[@popnbean9021]

Imagine being so bad that people cant even call you have a gold fish brain without insulting the goldfish

[@portiac6097]

That’s what it’s like for all bosses for a while

[@SayuHatto]

he is good at beating elden ring bosses, may be better than 70% of the players, swimming and may be a better content creator than most people. He has too much

[@YoGhoast]

I've never been so proud of a goldfish before, I love Lini

[@aidankurdelak]

This is an absolutely goated video man 10/10

[@Zazzone98]

From goldfish to boldfish, what a journey

[@DoubleT667]

anyone knows how long did it take for the gold fish to beat the first phase malenia? because im pretty sure it beat her faster than Lacari did

[@VictusBcb]

Epic fish bro! I liked using dual great omen cleavers for her, but your fish put bleed to good use :D

[@Tortellini-PCrowsFish-ny7cx]

I’d like to thank Micro Center for the PC, Eric for having the idea, and finally, Michael for making the program. It was hard work but I finally did it!

[@sasasasa6405]

its so hilarious to me that your fish is litteraly better than people like quantum tv. GOOD JOB TORTELLINI

[@scottiedarko7951]

13:00 She had never known defeat... before she met da fish

[@nateypateyu]

7:22 I like how, even tho Torttellini didn't need to heal, he still did it just to flex on Malenia and win on full health

[@dogwater_espresso]

6:08 was the saddest part bro good effort my man Tortellini

[@NintenHawk]

Incredible video! I really love this new editing style! Keep it up!

[@MrMcChickenMan.]

Even a fish is better than me

[@mr_blank4413]

Eric really got a fish to beat a boss that most people didn't even find huh

[@user-mh6zb4dm8x]

I remember watching that epic stream go torto

[@jayisokay6975]

This is one of the most inspiring thing in all of gaming

[@blurby7070]

EVERYONE SHALL FEAR THE GOLDFISH 🗿🍷

[@Nicole73737]

We need a follow-up of tortellini being able to beat Malenia entirely!

[@ranger6436]

Gotta say, this is just a very well made and high quality KZbin video

[@Zarmdthecoolest]

I love that the nature of humanity is such that we'll get heavily invested in a fish playing video games