in defence of rory | the antagonization of the formerly perfect girl

[@nknae3115]

I actually really liked Rory, her downfall demonstrated how life doesn't always end up how you want. Somewhat realistic.

[@maximegabriel]

I totally agree - her imperfections are what makes her relatable! I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for commenting! 😊💖

[@nknae3115]

I did enjoy the video

[@PelafinaLievre]

@@maximegabrielI think the problem is they exaggerated her flaws to the point they weren’t relatable. I was very much like Rory in high school. I even had a father who was in and out. I even majored in journalism. We just had less money. I never stole a yacht or slept with a married man. It’s just not relatable for me.

[@haleyadamic]

I've never fallen asleep while interviewing someone. What bogus writing was that??

[@mishthemaverick8607]

Absolutely. And rewatching as a mother of teenage girls, I really empathise with her.

[@rosebudsavesacat]

Every time she failed at anything she was supposed to be good at she had an existential crisis which is actually a very accurate portrayal of a gifted kid.

[@maximegabriel]

yes! I feel like not enough people talk about "gifted child syndrome" when it comes to rory - it explains a lot! I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for your comment! 😊 💘

[@unionunicorn6776]

You would have a mental break down every time you failed too, if everyone around you was telling you (and only you) that you’re not *allowed* to fail because you’re supposed to be perfect. Projecting perfection onto someone is a cruel thing to do to anyone. People should be allowed to make mistakes and be given the grace to be seen as a living breathing fallible human being. When you put someone up on a pedestal of perfection (the way people tend to do with celebrities) we make them out to be something other than human, almost god like. In doing so, what we actually do is take away their humanity. And it’s a cruel thing to not see someone else as human. Dehumanizing someone makes abusing them easier when you don’t see them as human. It makes abusing them “okay.” 💔

[@LoneWulf278]

@@unionunicorn6776 EXACTLY.

[@songindarkness]

True, speaking as a former “gifted child” whose life didn’t turn out as expected.

[@babraconstanzafernandezmun8819]

Facts.

[@andrewoliver7095]

As I've gotten older, I've realized the reason why I disliked Rory so much when I was younger was because she reflected the mistakes and poor decisions I myself had made.

[@maximegabriel]

i so agree - a lot of us see ourselves in rory, and sometimes we can resent the reflection she yields. thanks for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💖

[@chanuppuluri8726]

Shadow work

[@bernsky]

this is why I loved her so much, she could make similar mistakes as me and was still loved. i could have made the mistakes and still deserve love.

[@totebagcure]

Me but how i felt abt Jess. I hated him because he reminded me so much of myself.

[@jaymccray1763]

It always bugged me how Lorelei pouted and iced Rory out when she takes time off of Yale and only took her back when Rory went back on the track that SHE wanted. She was unsupportive and childish. And that’s coming from someone who does like Lorelei.

[@maximegabriel]

absolutely!! i love lorelai, but I really hate how she treated rory during her time off yale, it was kind of immature of her! I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for commenting 😊 💖

[@jaymccray1763]

@@maximegabriel I did like the video and I agree with everything you said. I fell into the Rory dislike for a long time, but I recently re-watched the show and came to the realization that the hate is very overblown. She made some really bad choices, sure, but not anything so unrealistic. Like you said, she had so many things influencing her, and she was so used to being the golden child, that no wonder she spiraled when faced with things she was never prepared or trained for. I felt bad for her.

[@melodyclark1944]

I don't like calling her childish and immature, but she was in the wrong. I mean her feels are valid. They had both always planned on her going to a prestigious school and yet you shouldn't try to make someone get an education they don't want to. That can't go anywhere good.

[@songindarkness]

Lorelei isn’t pouting, she’s being a mother. She knows that going to a prestigious university is what Rory wants and she’s only throwing it away because she’s had a hit to her confidence. Lorelei is trying to break through Rory’s stubbornness, especially when Rory runs away to her grandparents and to the life Lorelei left, which she knows is suffocating. And it’s not that long before Rory realises that Lorelei is right. I do think it was fair of Rory to take a break and come back to Yale in her own time though, and the show showed that so well. And I 100% agree Mitchum set out to give her the internship to humiliate her because he didn’t approve of her for Logan.

[@2002narrie]

i dont think that was lorelai’s intention, if you don’t remember, lorelai’s parents sabotaged her plan. she made that plan because she’s scared of rory following in her footsteps (i mean you all saw how lorelai was treated when that happened to her family) and the last thing she ever wants is for rory to go through the same things she did. she was upset bc this was rory’s dream and she knows how much it actually means to her, and for rory to just decide she didn’t want it (thats how it seemed to lorelai) must’ve been hard to comprehend. not to mention she knew about mitchum so she wanted rory to know it didnt mean anything. then her parents go and give her a place to stay and let her leave YALE (idk how she got back in like wtf) lorelai was rightfully angry, not really about rory dropping out but how she handled it and ran to lorelai’s parents (which is literally a huge slap in the face to lorelai) and lorelai already had other things to worry about like prioritizing luke (ive seen people say “why would she prioritize luke and not rory, its bc rory is now a grown adult and lorelai thinks she can trust her and wants to make things work with luke for the next chapter of her life) lmao but yeah that’s how i saw it tbh

[@macgirl1234]

The dean marriage thing was SO unfair! He told her they were done. He's the one who made the commitment to Lindsey, but Rory. Was it a bad decision? Sure. But people act like she broke up the marriage

[@maximegabriel]

I totally agree! I think it's weird that people always hate on rory for not seeing the red flag and trusting dean for his word, but don't criticize dean for lying about it! thanks for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💕

[@macgirl1234]

@@maximegabriel I did very much enjoy your take! Thank you for the video!!❤️

[@songindarkness]

Agree!

[@kaitlynkite]

@@maximegabrielabsolutely i agree!

[@raissalianna889]

She was just being a friend to Dean.. being there for him and calling him up even though she knew he was married.. she also criticized Lindsay because it's her place to do so maybe because she dated Dean first... actually no because rewatching GG she was never a friend to Dean she wanted him back.. and she did helped break up his marriage...

[@calsaver]

People dislike her now because she reflects themselves. I feel like she is the embodiment of being a millennial. I relate to her a lot, which hurts...but it's true.

[@maximegabriel]

I totally agree - so many of us relate to her, and she can show us an unflattering reflection of ourselves sometimes.. I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for commenting! 😊 💘

[@danin2013]

That's actually a really good analysis. I have never understood why people don't hold Paris to the same standards as Rory, and forget how she was a literal bully to everyone she didn't like, and how she basically forced her friendship on Rory, moving in with her on Campus and just taking advantage of her kindness. She's an amazing character but she'd be an awful person in real life. Also, it makes sense how Rory's worst enemy was fear. She was always on a pedestal and wanted to make everyone happy, and was scared she'd end up disappointing everyone. She didn't have any goals for herself. That is why at the end of the series all she can think about is writing her life with her mother, because her main goal was to make her mother and everyone else happy, above herself.

[@radhiadeedou8286]

Maybe because with Paris you get what you see, while Rory is presented like a nice person but she's actually horrible

[@oliviaoconnor2201]

Paris is funny and a side character and Rory isn't. Paris could do anything and wouldn't have a fall from grace because she was presented as an enemy in the beginning. It's like how people completely distort Emily's character bc she's "sassy" and ignore all her toxic traits.

[@maximegabriel]

absolutely! I love what you said about rory's main goal being to make her mother happy, I had never thought of that before, but it's so true! thank you for your comment, I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! 😊 💕

[@danin2013]

@@maximegabriel Thank you for your reply!! I feel honored :)

[@2029-jo]

It also makes me wonder if Rory actually went back to Yale because she wanted to or because Lorelai was manipulating her by freezing her out. Even if she had chosen the other path of working at the DAR/being an event planner (which she was actually good at btw) it would have been perfectly fine, but everyone (Lorelai, Jess, fans of the show who are haters) act like that was the worst thing ever. I really feel bad for Rory sometimes. I wish everyone would just let her make her own decision. I also agree with the Paris comparison in this video and the comments. I personally never got around to liking her. I don't care how funny or witty someone is, bullying is never okay and that's all that Paris is.

[@tildisrabarberblad9816]

I think a lot of people miss the fact that Lorelai has acedemic expectations of Rory; she wants to prove to her parents that, although, she, herself, didn't go to a prestigious university, she has produced a child that can live up to the expectations and uphold the family name. Lorelai gives it away in her conversation with Richard while Rory is interviewing for Yale, when she says something to the effect of Rory having been set on Harvard since she was a baby. Babies don't make plans for college. Rory's decision to take a break was a very healthy one and I found Lorelai's reaction immature and cruel. That's not to say that Lorelai is an entirely bad mother, but she's very possessive and subtly demanding of Rory and that puts Rory's behavior into perspective. I disagree that stealing a boat was out of character for her

[@maximegabriel]

I totally agree! i feel like to some extent, lorelai kind of projected the dreams she missed out on onto rory.. thank you for your comment, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💝

[@radhiadeedou8286]

Harvard was always Lorelei's dream. In many ways she saw Rory as an extension of herself, not as an individual

[@unionunicorn6776]

@@radhiadeedou8286Yes and that is being a narcissistic parent. That is abusive to Rory. I don’t understand how any can defend Lorelei’s actions.

[@unionunicorn6776]

Lorelei is very immature and always has been. I don’t understand how you can be rooting for a mother that always puts her own selfish desires over the very real needs of her child. How is the child who suffered parentification abuse (it’s a real thing, look it up if you don’t know what it is) the villain but the parent who was abusing her everyone gives a pass? I don’t understand it and it’s not fair to Rory. 😢

[@lauriecarson6483]

​@@unionunicorn6776that don't make since at all

[@geoffingoff]

The genius of the show's arc with Rory is that it can really change how you view the show. In the beginning of the show, you're totally on Lorelai's side as far as her relationship with Emily, and then by the end the audience is put in Emily's position. We are forced to watch the daughter we thought was perfect and had so much potential fall from grace, make mistakes, make sexually questionable decisions outside of monogamous/moral ideals and veer from the life her mother wanted for her while confirming some of her mother's worst fears. We thought Lorelai wasn't like her mother but Rory's journey might show that Lorelai was putting a ton of unseen pressure on her to be academically successful and sexually chaste. I actually love Rory's growth as she needs to stray from what her mother wants for her to find herself. That's why I interpret AYITL's ending as actually a chaotic but happy one, because she's always kind of needed to break free from Lorelai. What more poetic way than to make the choice that Lorelai dreads but happens to be the same choice Lorelai made so many years ago? But it feels like Rory's way of finding meaning for herself, even if it's uncomfortable for the audience.

[@maximegabriel]

I loved reading your take, thank you for your comment! I agree, I think lorelai inadvertently placed a lot of pressure on rory, and kind of externalized the dreams she missed out on onto rory.. I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💘

[@geoffingoff]

@@maximegabriel I loved it! Thanks for taking the time to put together a thoughtful analysis, especially knowing how much Rory hate is out there 😅

[@mariagracia8095]

It makes me think of the episode where we see Lane's grandmother and it turns out Mrs. Kim was just like Lane in the relationship with her mother

[@avi.chan23]

Rory isn't the most likeable character, but she is really complex and not just a two-dimensional figure. And I agree, that the fact Rory was somehow perfect in the beginning of the Show, made it really hard watching her doing something wrong or having flaws. She is unfaithful in her relationships and was so from the beginning. From her kissing Jess while being in a relationships with Dean to her sleeping with Logan while being in a relationship with Paul (A Year in Life), I think she really struggles to build deep Bonds with other people, some kind of trusting issues, like her mother.

[@maximegabriel]

absolutely! rory is multifaceted and three-dimensional.. I like what you said about her having a difficulty building deep bonds with others, I hadn't thought of that before! I hope you enjoyed the video, thank you for your comment 😊 💘

[@avi.chan23]

@@maximegabriel, I definitely enjoyed your video a lot. About the trusting issues, Rory might have, maybe it is based on the fact that not only did Lorelai have a really hard time trusting her partners, which Rory definitely watched, at some points Rory took over the role of her mothers best friend and the adult one in their relationship, thought this constellation has it's nice sides, especially for a show like Gilmore Girls, it still causes a lot of damage to the kids being in these kind of relations, as they learn in a subtle way, that they cannot trust the adults in their life, therefore not only grow up way to early but also never learn really to rely on others as they cannot fully rely on their parents.

[@Maca494]

one thing that pisses me off is when people say Logan did nothing and it was Jess who made her go back to Yale. No. Jess yelled at her face at the moment in her life she was ready to go back. if it had been Logan yelling to her, she would have gone back too. Is not because it was Jess, it's because she was ready at that time. All Logan did was scoff at her and tell her "you will be back, you love school" and let her take the time she needed until she realized it by herself. yeah. such a jerk, that dude. i swear people put Jess on a pedestal and he lives to critizise everything and everyone and feel superior. he did it to Dean (im smarter) and to Logan (that rich kid, entitled jerk. i'm better than him cause i do stuff from zero)

[@maximegabriel]

interesting take, I had never thought of that before! I always disliked how people gave jess all the credit for rory going back to yale - kind of discrediting/ignoring rory's role in getting her own life back on track. I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for your comment! 😊 💘

[@Maca494]

@@maximegabriel i really did. thank you for defending our girl

[@2002narrie]

@@Maca494thank you oml logan was way better than jess, jess was ridiculously immature and the way he’s like “i don’t deserve this rory” (rory using jess to feel better ab her relationship with logan) meanwhile jess did the same thing to her (jess using rory to feel better about her relationship with dean) like jess was the worst and i will die on that hill idk why people like him so much

[@Maca494]

@@2002narrie same. i dont forget that one time she stayed at home waiting for him to call her. to tell her what plans they had for the night. I get he was a troubled kid but he wouldnt stop being around her while she was someone else's girlfriend and then he acted like an idiot. people will literally tear apart Logan and Dean as if Jess was a perfect angel from heaven who never ever did anything wrong. pffft

[@2029-jo]

I love this!! Not to mention, Jess asked Rory to DROP OUT of Yale and run away with him literally the last time he saw her. And now he says the complete opposite!! (I personally think he was only speaking out of jealousy of Logan and not because he cared so much about her education) Another thing that bothers me is that Jess didn't even finish high school and was a horrible student and now he's yelling at Rory as if he knows everything about the situation. So hypocritical

[@Nina-lz1sn]

One moment that highlights everything for me is when shes talking to a professor who told her to drop his class, she literally said she HAS to take 5 classes because her grandpa had taken 5 classes when he studied at Yale.

[@maximegabriel]

absolutely! I totally forgot about that moment, you're so right! 😊 💘

[@JemimaDoesASMR]

The thing that gets me is (as you said) she's a child. Not every 16-21 year old will make the *same* poor decisions, but they will make poor decisions. I think because she's a "wise beyond her years" character in the early seasons, people hold her to the standard of a mature adult. She's 19 at the time of the Dean affair. Would every 19 year old girl in that situation make the same decision as her? No, of course not. Would a 19 year old be more susceptible to manipulation and poor impulse control, making them a lot more likely to judge the situation poorly and make the wrong decision compared with, say, a 30 year old? Absolutely.

[@laurazanetti8267]

Today i was rewatching the beginning of S4, and I noticed the shift from the beyond her years Rory and the more childish Rory. She started behaving childish since she started college, she is all "you were never a baby" and "i was fine staying at kindergarden it was you that was having trouble leasing me there" and the very first day she is in college she goes "i want my mommy". I think this was a very smooth and realistic way to present us with a less perfect Rory, she was mature when she lived with her mum (who was amazing, but also a total mess) because she felt like it was her responsibility to keep everything from falling apart, that way she never detached from her mother like an average teenager would do, until she was by herself and suddenly felt allowed to not alway be in control, while loosing the control of her emotions. She basically had a late teenagehood (there's even a scene where Rory locks herself in her room and Lorelai goes "i'm sorry weren't you supposed to go thought this a few years ago?")

[@francesschaefer]

​@@laurazanetti8267yes!

[@corneliahanimann2173]

I have said it before and offended many: Watching Rory after being a fan of gilmore girls during your teenage years is an excellent excercise in empathy for oneself. We all have tried and somewhat succeeded at being the good one that will make it. Most of us had to realize that we had privilege that carried us a to some extend, and this pain we feel when we watch Rory as an adult having learned not as much as we wish she had as an adult, is intimate and shameful and we are not quite yet ready to have the compassionate real talk with her, that we need to have with ourselves.

[@tt-xf2nr]

lovely comment and very accurate too! many people are too harsh on rory and that is because we are very harsh on our own selves, especially nowadays when it feels like every thing we do is under public scrutiny, thanks to social media, even when someone doesn't have much of a public presence on it, even just scrolling through a comment section is enough. there's a pressure to be perfect and always conscious, though that cannot be possible as we are all flawed human beings.

[@corneliahanimann2173]

@@tt-xf2nr yea I feel you. Watching Rory go through normal adulthood feels like listening to someone sing off the note on stage, and feeling lien few improvements would improve the performance, despite us knowing that this intimate shame not useful, there id a soundsystem tha probably won't let her hesr her own voice...everyone is putting her kn a pedestal and expercting great performance, it feels painful to watch, because it is so so familiar.

[@LauraSomeNumber]

Rory was never going to be a journalist, she was always going to be a writer. We never see her reading the newspaper it's always books and the stories she gets praised for throughout the show are always features rather than actual news stories. The Take just did a video recapping the whole show and I felt like whoever wrote it never actually watched the show and I came away wanting to defend Rory.

[@maximegabriel]

omg yes that makes so much sense!! rory would have been a great writer! I know exactly which video you're talking about, and I agree with you.. I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for commenting! 😊 💘

[@radhiadeedou8286]

Finally someone mentions this, thank you. We are told Rory wants to be a journalist but apart from the school papers we never see her passion for journalism. We see her love of literature and academia, she should've been a writer/lit professor

[@oooh19]

I used to link journalists and writers but I see how different they are

[@haleyadamic]

She's never displayed the character of a journalist which is why I never understood people saying Mitchum was trying to hurt Rory. He didn't have to say it like that and he was super cold about it, but I don't think he was trying to hurt her. I think he's just an abrasive ass who says what he thinks.

[@rebeccamccreary8530]

And every time she mentions her goals, journalism is just the road to traveling. She talks about going to Europe, she says she wants to see *something*, she doesn't say she wants to TELL people about it. She just wants to see it herself and the person she sees living the life she wants is a journalist.

[@Aelffwynn]

Nuance like this is tough for a lot of people! Part of the reason I LOVE Gilmore Girls is exactly this: every character has big flaws, every character makes pretty big mistakes, but they all have redeeming qualities and beautiful moments too. When people 100% villainize a character or 100% idolize a character, I wonder if they actually watched the show. I've had people get mad at me for criticizing Lorelai, Rory, Chris, Jess, Dean, etc., etc., and the crux of their argument always comes down to them thinking I am 100% against everything that character stands for. I am not. I don't have to pick a "team." I'm Team, "y'all should communicate better and do a little more self-reflection because you're hurting each other for no reason." I agree that they made Rory too perfect in the beginning, so that her mistakes seemed even worse than they actually were. I also agree that Mitchum intentionally broke her spirit. His family didn't want Logan marrying a "career girl." He figured if her spirits were crushed, then Rory would either break up with Logan or abandon her career goals to marry him.

[@maximegabriel]

I absolutely agree with what you say - the characters are three-dimensional and multifaceted, like real people! I hope you enjoyed the video, thank you for your comment! 😊 💕

[@francesschaefer]

Good one! Logan's father was really mean and sexist, too.

[@marthabayley4138]

I am only now just older than Rory had been in the show and it is insane the level of criticism she gets, she was still young and she's going to make mistakes- people are always judging her as if they were any better in their late teens/early twenties (The spin off is not canon)

[@maximegabriel]

absolutely, I couldn't agree more! people tend to hold rory to unreal standards.. I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for your comment! 😊 💘

[@ellyphilbin9444]

I agree with your thoughts on the Yale situation so much - I’ve always hated how much people look down on Rory for that but as someone who has also always placed high academic performance as their main source of identity and who has got into a very academic uni, I can say that uni is fucking tough. Suddenly you’re surrounded by many other people who are equally smart and you are so exhausted from putting so much into your school work and getting into uni, you very easily become burnt out. That scene where she breaks down to dean about feeling like she failed at Yale is one of my favourite scenes of the whole show because of how much I relate. Add on having a massive confidence knock like that one she got and yeah you can definitely see how that was her last straw. I completely agree that taking a break to reassess and catch your breath is sometimes so important and the best thing she could have done in that situation

[@davidbelley9025]

I understand! I know very smart and dedicated people that are having a hard time and it discourages them. But again, Rory is a good example in this way: as she picked herself up. Thanks for the video and the discussions it generates. I would love to hear your cat's take on Rory's return to school!

[@francesschaefer]

Yes went through that as a HS as a big fish in small pond. My story is very different but in that aspect familiar.

[@thatgirldaria]

I think one of the reasons people do not like to see “Rory’s fall” is because it’s realistic and reminds them of their own life. Also just like people in Stars Hollow we see Rory as a perfect girl who can do not wrong so we feel disappointed in case she does something that does not fit into “perfect girl” picture anymore. Thanks for the video ☺️

[@rainy905]

it's also how the audience was introduced to Rory from the beginning of the show as he stated. As the show progressed, when we saw her character progression,( I'd say the writers took a realistic approach.) Sure, Rory isn't my favourite character, but she doesn't deserve that much hate upon second viewing.

[@minakshibastapure6117]

How imperfect female characters face more criticism than actual male villians 💯 People conveniently forget that jess harassed, stalked and sexually assaulted her.

[@unionunicorn6776]

As someone who can relate to Rory and how she grew up (parentified by a single parent who insisted on treating me like a best friend rather than an actual daughter), it really hurts me to know just how hated Rory is. Rory didn’t grow up with a father, of course she is susceptible to manipulation by cheating husbands like Dean. She was never taught the red flags of bad men that fathers are supposed to teach their daughters. Rory is the victim of generational trauma, but most people just blame her as if she has no good qualities. Like Rory is given no grace to fail or make mistakes, and I think it is because she was put on this pedestal of perfection. But when you put someone on a pedestal you hurt them because you take away their humanity. Rory is a complicated character who deserves some grace. I agree Rory is held to impossible standards and I don’t understand the hate for her. 💔

[@signalfire15]

There’s another element at play with the Rory hate which is that Rory’s “downfall” / her journey into adulthood has her leaning more and more into the “privileged” life of her grandparents, a life that her mother literally ran away from and tried so hard to protect Rory from. Since Lorelai is the main protagonist of the show and viewers empathize the most with Lorelai wanting to escape from that life of privilege, Rory stepping into it as she aged was an unwelcome form of growth in viewers’ eyes. I tend to view Lorelai and Rory’s journeys in life to be the same thing, except in reverse. Where Lorelai was a troubled teen and ran away from a life of privilege and grew / matured as she aged, Rory was a good well-behaved teen who ran towards a life of privilege and reverted into a more childlike and lost state as she aged. Interestingly enough, the writers had the very last line of the show be Rory telling her mom she was pregnant, a true full circle moment to bring Rory’s reverse storyline in line with Lorelai’s beginning. I don’t understand people who hate Rory. She makes so much sense to me. Maybe the writing is TOO GOOD and people just can’t cope with the realism lol.

[@CathanCrowell]

I love everything about this video :) I am huge Gilmore Girls fan and I am repeating all of this almost all the time. "She can't win", spot on. Good job, bro.

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you so much for your kind comment! I'm so glad you enjoyed the video 😊 💕

[@irishmuse]

The thing that always bugs me is that the show writes off all the volunteer/community work that Rory does around Stars Hollow. When Paris brags about all her volunteer, extra-curricular work and Rory panics the show expects us to just forget about all the work Rory does for her town, that is exactly what a student would put on their college applications.

[@maximegabriel]

absolutely, I so agree! plus, she had worked at her mom's inn too! thanks for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video 😊 💞

[@kenna_g1rl]

my favorite thing about this show is no one is perfect and rory is one of the greatest examples in the show, every character has their highs and lows like we do in real life it’s what makes gilmore girls so relatable also with the internship mitchum definitely knew what he was doing. as a female journalism major, it’s a very male dominated industry and being an intern makes it even more uncomfortable. she didn’t “show initiative” because she felt like she couldn’t.

[@francesschaefer]

Yes! Good point~

[@abigailmarsh772]

From my heart through your mouth. Finally a voice of reason enters the discussion

[@maximegabriel]

aahhh thank you!! i'm glad you enjoyed the video, thanks for the kind comment 😊 💘

[@empanatita]

this was such a genius breakdown, i'm so impressed by how eloquently you expressed some of my thoughts regarding the characters!!!

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you so much, it means a lot to me!! so glad you enjoyed the video 😊 💞

[@beaucoupspaceship2349]

I really enjoyed this deep-dive into her character! I do feel a bit like her dropping out of uni was shown maybe a little too much through the lens of how how mother Lorelei felt about it. I had my confidence knocked in a similar way when I thought I was going to study mathematics at university and my A-Level maths teacher said that I wouldn't be able to. I appreciate that I was not as academic as I expected myself to be, but I lost enthusiasm, my health wasn't so great at that time and ended up dropping out. Regardless of my ability in the subject, I really wish that my teacher had been more encouraging. Especially since there are a shortage of Maths teachers.

[@marcelarosa8036]

I feel like a lot of the hate on Rory comes from projection. We start the series relating ourselves to Rory because we've all been there, we've all been teenagers worried about our future, going through the dilemmas of young love etc, so we can't help but root for her, and we're always so happy for her exactly for the fact that she can do no wrong. We want to be like this Rory. Therefore, when she makes mistakes, it kind of breaks the "bond" we've made with the Perfect Rory, the one that cannot go wrong, because it's like she lost the game and became ordinary just like any of us

[@sanskritibarman4928]

This video makes so much more sense than the Rory hate bandwagon. As someone who literally is in Rory's position, I can tell you that yes even in real life this happens. People will hate you when u act up but totally forget what made you act up in the first place. While rest of the people around you go on making bigger mistakes and exploit your kindness for their own whims and fancies are usually not even held upto the same criticism if not worse. Let me tell you, a reason why the perfect person may do something out of character; it is not questionable but pretty understandable bcoz they are literally surrounded by bunch of manipulative shrews whose actions often go unnoticed bcoz everybody will excuse them thinking that yes they are built that way and can violate others. So even the perfect person isn't able to decide whether it's good or bad bcoz no one seems to blame or criticize the character with bad behaviour (bcoz it's expected and excusable) and so they go along with it. The fact is, no one is perfect and if everyone is held to the same standard of human emotions and reactions, the there are several characters besides Rory who deserve the critique. But ig PPL are so flawed themselves that they derive pleasure by projecting their inadequacies onto someone that initially seemed so perfect to them. I really liked Rory and I think her only problem was that she really didn't chase what naturally came to her (being a writer) but instead kept pushing her passion into smthg that wasn't smthg innate (being a journalist).

[@danishson97]

I guess one thing that always bugged me was that Rory never seemed to be actually sorry but more sorry for being caught. At least she cried and felt off with Lindsey. Bjt what about Odette? These things do bug me because it just tells me Rory was okay with cheating, which isn't okay. I guess i just wish the writers wouldn't justify her way of doing things, or at least turn it around where she at least felt bad and sorry and wanted to change. To me Rory has always been the girl who would feel bad or stand up for the little guy, because she knew how it felt to feel small. They slowly took that away from her and i hate that.

[@anaghakangovi7065]

I love this video! It's so refreshing to see someone look at Rory in a different light. She's never been my favorite character, but I've always thought the hate she receives is totally disproportionate to what she actually does on this show. I also never looked at the Rory/Dean affair from this angle, but I agree that Dean manipulated her into sleeping with him. Yes, Rory definitely made a terrible mistake, but now I can better understand what was actually going on in her head when she did it. It is absolutely bonkers how much people hate her lol thank you for making this video :-)

[@heythere6789]

I'm not gonna say I love the rory stealing a boat storyline, but Logan apparently did the same thing the year before and got off scott free. So I'm guessing that's why she felt it would be harmless

[@maximegabriel]

oh wow so true, I had totally forgotten about that! thanks for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💕

[@chiara4243]

You make really good points, I really appreciated this video :)) as someone who relates to Rory a lot (first few seasons of course lol I’m not out here at Yale stealing boats and husbands) it’s nice to see some positivity for a change I think it’s always forgotten as well that TV show characters are ALWAYS more naive than real people. A real person would’ve had more critical thinking in a lot of situations, but it often makes for bad TV if situations become too akin to our real lives

[@LegendaryCS4]

This is so well said. You did such a wonderful job of articulating what seems to be dogpiling / bullying (yes of a character so not the same as a real person) that the internet loves to do. I feel the same thing can be said of Tori from Victorious, as well.

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you so much for your kind comment! I love your tori comparison, you're so right! 😊 💞

[@jusssable]

Love it. I totally agree with your opinion. Also, I explain Rorys bad behaviour (cheating etc) with intentionally rebelling against the good-girl-brand. She was a teenager shouldering very high expectations by her family and the town. She was rebelling against her mother like Lorelai was rebelling against her parents when she was a teenager. It just looks different in every generation.

[@kyndramb7050]

The Dean affair is so triggering for me. My first husband was a gaslighting POS, and Dean turned into that. The whole cellphone part basically happened to me, except I was the one working OT, and I was the one paying for the mobile bill. He even claimed he lost the phone, but was really hiding it in his truck. Dean always had red flags, he had anger issues.

[@thatjillgirl]

Yep. I hate Dean and always have since the part where he broke up with Rory when she wasn’t ready to say “I love you” right when he was. It felt so whiny and manipulative to me. He never improved past that, in my opinion. Now the last time we see Dean on the show, he’s, what, twenty years old? So hey, I like to think that maybe he grew up and improved as a person. Most of us aren’t the same person at thirty as we are at twenty, so it’s entirely possible. But we don’t know. We never see it. The Dean we see is a selfish baby who is only a sweet boyfriend if his girlfriend is being whatever idealized version of her he has imagined.

[@carak1359]

I think that part of the reason that people dislike Rory or even Lorilai is that both have been kind of written in a "not like other girls" kind of trope..and I think a lot of people are just really over that trope and maybe project that dislike or even anger onto characters that reflect that trope..but that's just a guess - there is also a lot of harsh commentary on her that I don't agree with and your points make perfect sense too..

[@maximegabriel]

i really agree! often when rewatching the show I am blatantly reminded that it is a product of the early/mid 2000s, and I feel like some of the time epoch's misogyny is present in the show.. thank you for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💘

[@melodyclark1944]

True. It's meant to be empowering, but the way they present the cool girls and especially who they're contrasted from (Sherry and Lindsey) is disappointing.

[@eirarnneberg3272]

OMG yes!!! Finally someone voiced exactly what I’ve been feeling too 😹 She’s a multi-dimensional character which is realistic, more relatable and entertaining to watch. To add to your point about the “Paris deserved Harvard more than Rory” which I also think is complete bullshit. Rory shows time and time again that she is a good teammate and collaborates really well with people and is a genuinely nice person to be around. These are qualities also highly valued by accademia and being able to work with other people. Paris constantly did horrible in group work and only thought of herself, while Rory was being fair, inclusive and doing what was best for the group. So in this regard too, Rory “deserved” more than Paris to get into Harvard. Great video!! 👌

[@davidbelley9025]

Hi Maxime Gabriel. Thank you very much for this insightful post on an influential character of Stars Hollow. I was impressed by your theory about Mitchum Huntzberger, and how he could have consciously brought Rory under his wing in a grand gesture of accepting her into the family, despite the push-back Rory experienced by the Huntzbergers, to later crush her as a reporter. Admitting he could have taken a mentoring or nurturing approach with her. Mitchum could have nudged her out of the comfort zone of bringing coffee to other team mates towards the critical thinking approach and constantly inquisitive nature of a true reporter. However, this event shook still contributed to Rory's growth as she later came to a similar realization herself and achieved success in her professional life. Thanks for this very interesting topic on such an excellent show!

[@maximegabriel]

absolutely! thank you so much for your kind comment, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💘

[@theresabaschal5061]

I think people really just don't like characters with a negative character arcs. Rory had one with her whole spiral, helped along with Logan and the Huntsberger BS and worsened with the Gilmore family rift, but it's very uncomfortable because it's happened to so many of us and it causes an uncomfortable introspection. It's kind of like in Avengers: Endgame that everyone hates Fat Thor. They didn't hate Fat Thor; they hated Depressed Thor, and the jokes thrown in were a bit tonally dissonant, which I thought brought some severity to his feelings and was meant to be very uncomfortable. I mean, in the span of about 8-ish years he lost his family and his world and half the life in the universe... For a 1500 year old man that kind of like a really bad 35 days for one of us. It's uncomfortable, especially since our heroes are only supposed to improve. Similarly, Iron Man has a backslide in Age of Ultron that many people thought wasn't believable, but having not actually dealt with his panic attacks from Iron Man 3 and mental health rarely has linear improvement (more of a two steps forward and one step back thing) it's not comfortable to watch. Especially since we know this thing he's doing with Bruce is dumb and will lead to a villain. Didn't he read the script?

[@maximegabriel]

I love the marvel comparisons!! yeah, I agree with you - a lot of us identify with rory, and her "downfall" might hold an uncomfortable mirror to our own lives.. I really enjoyed reading your comment, thank you! 😊💘

[@TheBigMe0w]

You make good points! It's very uncomfortable for me too. But I feel like it hits harder because Gilmore Girls was a more uplifting show in the beginning, a comfort watch, and we could root for the characters. The longer the show went on it became harder and harder for me to watch them make wrong choices and watch dysfunctional relationships. There's more and more drama and lots of it comes down to opportunistic writing. Like Luke acting out of character for an episode just to cause tension and Dean becoming a douche so people start rooting for Jess. It's uncomfortable and I wish it weren't

[@maximegabriel]

you're so right - "opportunistic writing" is exactly how I feel about the whole boat stealing ordeal too! I feel like the writers were looking to incorporate some needed drama to the show, and kind of made some characters act in uncharacteristic manners in the process.. thank you for the comment, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💝

[@snackdragonn]

Oh, goodness, I loved this video! Okay, so here are my thoughts: 1. I definitely agree with everything you said, and I always loved Rory growing up because she was so motivating to watch! 2. Paris is autistic. It should not excuse her poor behavior, but I would like to submit this as a reason for her "rude" behavior. I mean, she's also just rude, lol, but often I notice her bluntness is just her trying to be factual. 3. I wonder if Rory, with the boat scene, was trying (stupidly) to see what kind of person she wanted to be. Like, maybe (she could have thought) she's more like Logan and his gang. I think that was her trying to figure that out, and when she realized that obviously didn't suit her, she dropped out to take more time to consider. 4. Your voice is so soothing!

[@maximegabriel]

awe I'm so glad you loved the video, thank you! same, I've always empathized with rory :) very interesting takes! it makes a lot of sense that rory was trying to figure out if she was like logan and his friends - it explains why she would do something so uncharacteristic of her! thanks for your kind comment 😊 💝

[@2029-jo]

Omg I love you for this!! You've said every single thing I've been saying for years, especially the unfair comparison and double standards people have with Rory vs other characters. Rory is a kind, hardworking and empathetic character and she'll always be my favorite no matter what!! 💗

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you so much, I'm so glad you enjoyed the video!! yeah for sure, I agree - Rory will always have a dear spot in my heart 😊 💝

[@mysticdesire]

rory is the product of her environment. from the day she was born expectations were placed on her, she was placed on a pedestal her entire life and expected to do no wrong. chilton was one of the first instances where she was no longer ‘special’. the harvard thing is insane, paris was deserving and dedicated, but let’s not act like rory wasn’t just as hardworking in her own right. my dad went to harvard in the late 80s-early 90s & the thing is even the people who are deserving of going there don’t get in. he always mentioned how corrupt the ivy league is, how the kids that were truly deserving of the opportunity didn’t get in because of several factors such as financial situations, extracurriculars, SAT scores, none of that shit really mattered and many of those opportunities would go to rich spoiled kids who got in based on their name or money. my grandparents had to take out a loan from their mortgage to pay the tuition, and those rich kids got in because of their name and money, not bc of their ambition. as for the yale years, SHE BURNED OUT. again, she was placed on a pedestal, when mr huntzberger said that she didn’t have what it took, her entire life crumbled. her entire life trajectory changed, and while many write it off as criticism there’s no denying that his opinion had far more to do with the fact that she was a woman & not her talent. sleeping with dean was a mistake, and she immediately received the consequences and learned from that mistake. it was wrong, and rory was very much in the wrong but SO WAS DEAN. dean was the married man who had just as much of a role if not an even bigger role than rory. yes, she’s a spoiled girl with lack of self awareness but that happens when you were raised to believe by the people around you that you deserved more, that you were better than everyone and that you were more worthy. once reality hit her that it was no longer gonna go the way it was supposed to she burned out and lost motivation because she felt as though she no longer had something to look forward to. i honestly think she was more unbearable in the reboot, because in that case she was grown & became a self absorbed insufferable woman who believed she was above everyone, which completely went against who she once was. that being said, i don’t believe she’s a bad person, but she is a product of an environment that placed her on an unrealistic pedestal. once she entered the real world she was no longer on that pedestal, she was no longer ‘special’ and actually had to work for that title. does this make her as bad as everyone makes her out too be? no.

[@Mihaila-7892]

THANK YOU!! for the Dean affair thing! It get me sooo mad when people don't acknowledge all the gaslighting Dean gave her! And she was not a 40+ year-old woman, to be held the sole responsible. She was still a very young and unstable girl, that was misguided her entire life. She did not have a present dad but only a very clincy/immature mother that required from Rory the support a parent should give the child.

[@HeiressOfLoganbeeren]

You are absolutely right.... If everyone always sees you as a perfect agreeable good girl and subsequently expects that of you, it can drive you mad, and I kind of admire her for breaking out of that and taking her time to rethink her life for a semester. But I think the Revival didn't do her any favors and I'm not sure where they were trying to take her character. The being out of a job and struggling thing could have been interesting, but the whole boyfriend stuff and generally the disregard towards other people was not the nicest thing

[@hellofromthestarrynight4458]

I relate to Rory because everyone loves her because she matches up to everyone’s expectations but when she does smth they don’t like they immediately drop her like during her sweet sixteen, dropping out of Yale etc

[@mariemadeja]

This was such an enjoyable time for me. Thank you for seeing good in people ❤

[@maximegabriel]

awe I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! thanks for your kind comment 😊 💖

[@Janeswona]

oh my god finally. you just voiced everything I have been ranting, to anyone who will listen to me, about this show. thank you

[@maximegabriel]

awe im so glad you enjoyed the video, thank you for your comment! 😊 💞

[@Aisha-vj7js]

Thank you for saying what I've been thinking! Rory is criticized for her mistakes harsher by people who perceive her not as a teenage character, but as a perfect good girl. I think that it's mostly because other characters in the show frequently repeat that narrative, which could piss people off when they see that she does not act like that. Also it could be jealousy, because I often see that along with Rory haters go her boyfriend defenders and those concerned of her privilege.

[@2029-jo]

100 % !! I've wondered about the jealousy thing too, because it's crazy how people will even defend (among many others) someone like Jess for forcing himself on Rory but Rory is attacked for far less

[@maximegabriel]

yess absolutely!! thank you for your comment, im so glad you enjoyed the video 😊💕💕

[@jilly6765]

I love you so much for this! THANK YOU. I love Rory and empathize with her character. Yes, she made mistakes, but so did almost everyone on the show. It was really frustrating how everyone hates her so much. And you're so right - she would've also received so much backlash if she didn't mess up and would be called boring and a Mary Sue. Poor girl can't win

[@isobelrosen9902]

Another thing that really annoys me is when people criticise Rory for caring about money more than Lorelai. I feel like they forget that Lorelai grew up very rich, whereas, as you say, Rory's childhood was underpinned by financial instability and literally living in a shed for the first 8 years of her life. So of course she's more conscious of money, because she's grown up in poverty, whereas Lorelai grew up in extreme wealth.

[@emilymarques6739]

Finally! Someone talking about Rory in this light. I’ve always felt this way. Loved listening to this video. Thank you ♥️♥️

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you, you are so kind! I'm so glad you enjoyed the video 😊 💝

[@alyzu4755]

A lot of good points made here. And the kitty is adorable! 🥰

[@maximegabriel]

thank you so much! I hope you enjoyed the video :) awe I agree, she's the cutest hahaha 🐈‍⬛ 😊 💝

[@leli6291]

not me getting distracted by the cute cat

[@maximegabriel]

awe hahaha she is very cute!! 🥰 🐈‍⬛

[@maggieo1683]

THANK YOU! I have seen so many people hate on Rory and you made a ton of excellent points in this video! I love what you said about her taking a little time off. There's no shame in that. I didn't do quite the same thing, but after high school I decided to take a gap year before starting college, because I was genuinely going through the absolute worst time in my life and didn't have motivation for school anymore and needed a break. My family actually was against me taking this break and critisized me for it. But I stood up for myself, and I took the gap year and started therapy, and it was one of the best decisions I ever made. I came back to school as a straight A student and now I'm about to graduate with my AA and start work on my bachelor's degree. Off topic, I know, but still, your point about people shaming Rory for "dropping out of school" when she literally didn't was very validating to Rory, me, and I know plenty of other people, too.

[@annaashburn7686]

I actually didn’t see as much Rory hatred until the revival. But IMO, true GG fans ignore the revival 😂 your video humanizes her again for me- thank you!

[@maximegabriel]

omg yes!! I watched the revival once when it came out and never watched it again - I don't even consider it as part of the show lol! awe I'm glad you liked the video, thanks for your comment! 😊 💝

[@roetc]

Yes I think so too!! Plus i also ignore season 7 lol

[@annaashburn7686]

@@roetc yes season 7 is not it! But it’s still better than the revival lol

[@thatjillgirl]

I mean, I consider myself a “true GG fan” (whatever that’s supposed to mean, and don’t ignore the revival. I hate where it leaves off (I disagree strongly with ASP that that was somehow the perfect ending for the series), and I think a lot of the ground it treads would have made more sense if it happened within a few years of the end of the main series instead of ten years later. And there were bits of it that weren’t super satisfying (like the town musical went on for too long). But I don’t hate it. I loved what it did for Emily’s character and I was glad Lorelai got some sense of closure in the loss of her father. I do wish we could see a more satisfying growth arc for Rory than the little bit it gave us. I’m genuinely curious how motherhood would change her life.

[@annaashburn7686]

@@thatjillgirl you’re welcome to disagree! For me, it means I’ve watched the show since there was still a blockbuster and you had to rent out the DVDs, so for about half of my life. I feel strongly about the original feel and storytelling style in the original series. Most people I know absolutely hated the revival, because it didn’t follow the original tone of the show and didn’t make sense in terms of a cohesive timeline that makes sense for these characters 10 years later. But I respect your perspective!

[@carolineb.9596]

but can we talk about how your cat is ADORABLE and the prettiest ever??? (also good points!)

[@maximegabriel]

AWE you are so kind!! I agree hahaha 😂🥰💕 thanks for your comment 😊

[@Rubester-cl6op]

I don’t think Rory was the worst just that she needed to get into some healthy trouble when she was a teenager that caused some problems as a young adult i think even Lorelei felt that on some level.

[@charlottebuijteweg7160]

Your video was such a breath of fresh air! Rory is one of my favourite characters cause we’re very much alike but hatred towards her is so bad that I began to wonder if I was in the wrong for not thinking she was a bad person, and if she was then I how have I been? Needless to say it send me into a whole existential crisis 😅 don’t worry I am in therapy

[@maximegabriel]

awe I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! I so get that, I too have doubted myself at times wondering if I was in the wrong for empathizing with Rory hahaha! thank you for your comment 😊 💘

[@ticijevish]

Finally, the voice of reason! I agree with all your points. More importantly, the text (the show itself) does, too! In continuation of your valid criticism of Rory, I feel that the boat theft also disqualifies Logan from the title of "best boyfriend for Rory". And there are sooooo many inane videos making that claim. I keep thinking how that scene could have gone differently where Logan steers Rory to a specific yacht, saying he knows hot to sail that particular type of yacht, and not the others. Then that particular yacht turns out to be owned by a friend of Logan's family and he satphones them as they sail out and gets permission to sail it behind Rory's back. Then they spend a night out at sea and talk things out, letting Rory cool off and regain some perspective, and sail back into port, no arrests, no court drama, no legal mess to distract her from what's important. Instead, he acted like an inconsiderate jerk and went along with an idea he knew would have awful consequences for her. Awful excuse for a person that proclaims to love her and ought to have her best interests at heart.

[@maximegabriel]

I loved reading your comment, you make great points!! thanks for commenting, I'm glad you enjoyed the video 😊💕

[@serenamystic29]

I’m always contradicting myself in regards to Rory, sometimes I love her, sometimes I hate her. But I up until now I realize that she’s my favorite character as well, with mistakes and all. (Except for the Netflix special lol). There’s a reason I’m always rewatching Gilmore Girls hehe

[@bexxington759]

Damn, you killed this. I agreed with you wholeheartedly. Love that you adjusted people's memory on the cheating with Dean moment and reminded everyone that not only do women recieve harsher criticism, but Rory was absolutely manipulated by Dean in that moment. You also revived the importance of people taking breaks and the value that can be found in those breaks, which I've never seen mentioned with regards to Rory's storyline and is absolutely the case. It's also so relatable. I also felt for Rory with the level of empathy you brought out with the Mitchum situation. Where was his constructive criticism? He was absolutely a bully. Then when she escalates to the boat theft - like, it's entirely out of character. Thanks for coming with the facts and helping defend a great character.

[@angeliprimlani9389]

I really love this video. My theory about the Rory hate is that many people identified with her growing up and when she started to show human flaws many in the audience felt called out or afraid that this was the spiral they were heading for or even fated for. I actually prefer messy, later Rory who I find very realistic and very much a portrait of what happens to an overly pressured gifted kid, including her further downward spin in Year of the Life. But I also was older and more inclined to identify with Lorelei, who was presented from the start as a hot mess express, maybe with a good heart but not without flaws. (Lorelei’s pregnancy may also have been gifted child syndrome manifesting as open rebellion).

[@metro121482]

I didn't really start to hate Rory until the revival series. In the original series, she made some poor decisions and plenty of mistakes, but that is normal for a kid in their late teens and early twenties. She was selfish, spoiled, and entitled, especially in the last few seasons. So are a lot of kids at that age. But I really disliked her in the revival, because she was an actual ADULT who did not seem to grow up or mature at all! She was still the same self-centered, spoiled, entitled brat she was in the original series! Worse, actually. The character flaws that were acceptable or understandable in a late teen/early twenties girl were pathetically sad and unbearably obnoxious in a fully grown woman!

[@babadoudidadouda]

Thank you for this video. You present some very solid arguments and have a very soothing voice. I was discouraged by all the negativities around Rory from continuing to watch the show, but now I'm going to put it back on the "to finish watching" list. She actually sounds really interesting as a main character. Especially the whole "gifted child's burn-out" angle. P.S. There's another KZbinr who made two videos defending Rory in regards to her friendship with Paris, Pensive Whiskers, I'd recommend checking those out if you haven't already.

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you so much for your comment, I am so happy you liked the video! thank you for the recommendation, I will for sure check it out! 😊 💞

[@boranyachoudhury7033]

I relate with Rory on so many levels. People don't like her after the downfall but I think her downfall was the most realistic thing. She is one of my most favourite characters ever!

[@maximegabriel]

same!! she's one of my favourite characters ever too 😊 thanks for your comment, I hope you enjoyed the video 💞

[@segiitaff6421]

i agree so much!! + i love they way you made your arguments

[@maximegabriel]

thank you so much!! I'm so glad you liked the video 😊 💞

[@arcraus]

I think the heart of it, at least for me, is that Rory seems to lack an independent personality and strength of convictions. She knows academic validation, the validation of her town, and an internalized reflection of their "perfect" image of her. She is either mirroring Lorelei, her grandparents, her boyfriends, or reaching after seemingly arbitrary goals she crafted for herself at a young age (do we ever really see her being a good journalist?) I like the reading of Rory as a "fallen" gifted child, because Rory's story is ultimately about a "spectacular child" realizing she's an overwhelmingly average adult.

[@maximegabriel]

interesting take, thanks for commenting! I hope you enjoyed the video 😊 💖

[@arcraus]

@@maximegabriel it was great, so thoughtful. I love analyzing this show

[@huecosenvezdeojos]

Omg your comment is spot on!

[@bobby_naur]

Only two videos???? I can't wait for more! Subscribed✨️✨️

[@maximegabriel]

awe you're so kind, thank you so much!! I hope you enjoyed the video, there are more to come that's for sure 😊 💞

[@MaricaAmbrosius]

I think the main reason many criticize Rory is that they know she's vulnerable to criticism. Criticism is her achilles heel. Paris, Lorelai, Luke, those would get mad and possibly tear you a new one if you judged them the way people judge Rory. Rory runs off crying and gets herself arrested.

[@maximegabriel]

wow I never thought of it like that before, you make a great point! thanks for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💘

[@ladypictureshow66]

Thank you for pointing out the double standards and analyzing all of this. I really appreciate this analysis and love the video. Thank you 🫶

[@anastasia8268]

I don’t understand why it seems like everyone loves Paris because someone being a bully is an instant no for me.

[@maximegabriel]

yeah, everytime I rewatch the show, I am baffled at how rory is held to such different standards than paris. people tend to forget paris' flaws and remember her for good qualities, but define rory by her mistakes. thanks for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💖

[@yeetyeetskrt5627]

Paris got better in the progression of the show. She grew and became a more kind and secure version of herself. That's why she is loved. Rory got worse with time and became a asshole.

[@shreevidhyaiyer1062]

12:06 I totally agree either this point. Receiving so much hate for dropping out and taking a break especially when 1]You need it in terms of mental health and 2] You taking a break does not effect the financial situation of your parents or parental figures.

[@maximegabriel]

yes, you're so right! thanks for your comment, I hope you enjoyed the video 😊 💖

[@alyssamendoza7708]

this is such a great take! honestly i think i have been too hard on her at times. but i do agree she is at her core a good person and we all make mistakes growing up but she is held to a very high standard so hers seem worse.

[@maximegabriel]

awe thanks for the kind comment, I'm happy you enjoyed the video! 😊 💘

[@annazareba6662]

I agree with you completely! Tbh, i was a bit surprised by the hate Rory receives online😅 She's a kid and later a young adult, so she is supposed to make mistakes

[@elize2952]

I just finished watching the show for the first time ever and I actually loved Rory for most of it. I related to her a lot as a teen in school and all the way through Chilton graduation. All of the mistakes she made during that time were mistakes that I found relatable as well because I made some of them. The only time I “strongly disliked” her, never hate, was in season 6 or 7 when she actually starts to go off the rails a bit, but even then it makes sense. I’ve been treated like a genius by my family my whole life and sometimes I struggle to understand why, I’ve been trying to distance myself from that perceived image they have of me because I’m just a regular person, and I’ve been trying to convince my parents of that first.

[@maximegabriel]

thank you so much for sharing! I agree, so many of us relate with Rory! thanks for your comment, I hope you enjoyed the video 😊 💝

[@cosmok-1367]

0:31 - 3:10 Okay, I will admit. I was team Dean when I first started watching Gilmore Girls. He was the ideal first boyfriend: Attentive, protective, open-minded and it helped that his actor was really good looking. Yeah, I will admit he does get worse later on, but part of me feels that is mostly due to character assassination, especially when Jess comes in and Rory begins to get the hots for Luke's nephew. Now, yes, Dean may have had his moments of being a bit selfish, especially in season one. He's upset that Rory doesn't say "I love you" back, even though i can somewhat sympathize, considering all they've been through. However, I also believe that due to them being teenagers, it's possible Dean over-reacted and realized it only later, and he tried to apologize, but we see the town basically chewing him out a new one. Keep in mind, the townsfolk are all protective over Rory, so their treatment of Dean after the break up made it seem like he was the one at fault, without getting both sides. The fact that Luke beat him up outside the diner when Dean was going to get breakfast, not knowing Rory was inside, is proof enough that those people are a bit over the top. And honestly, if I were in Dean's shoes, and I had gotten in a fight with the diner man just because the girl I was dating was there after our break up, yeah I would take that as a sign to lay low. Because if the diner man was going to attack me, who knows what else these crazy townies will do! (I'm honestly surprised Taylor didn't fire Dean after the Rory incident) We also can't forget that Rory did string Dean along while she was emotionally cheating on him with Jess. Lots of people say that Dean became possessive during season two and three, but looking back, it's no wonder. Rory didn't tell Dean about the kiss with Tristan, she didn't tell him about her getting close to Jess, so in Dean's mind, he's worried that Rory might be hanging out with so many guys and making romantical bonds with them. Keep in mind, Rory has little to no male friends throughout the series. Most of the guys she hangs out with around her age are either A. In a relationship with her, B. Wants to be in a relationship with her, or C. In a relationship with someone else so they can't have her. With that kind of pattern, it makes sense Dean would become insecure. Especially when at the end of S2E18, Dean, after trying to hang out with Rory and doing nice things for her, realizes that she is slowly falling for Jess. And that hurt my heart, because he was doing all of this to show Rory he was still trying to be a good boyfriend, but she showed little appreciation for it. And in S3E7, Rory pretty much confirms Dean's fears that she loves Jess, by constantly mocking the girl Jess is with, even though Jess is using Shane just to break up Rory and Dean. And honestly, Dean has every right to break up with Rory this time, because she shows how upset she is that she isn't with Jess! Again, Rory strings Dean along while she wants to be with Jess. As if that wasn't bad enough, Dean tries to just be friends with Rory, and it seems to go well. But he's constantly being bad mouthed and put down by Jess, even though Dean is just hanging out with Rory. (And people think Jess is the mature one? Check again!) And when Dean does move on with Lindsey, it seems pretty cute and I was happy he found someone else. I'll admit, them getting married so early was a bit of a stretch, especially when they had only been together for less than a year. And we also see their marriage having cracks even before the affair. Now, in defense of Dean, I could attribute this kind of rocky relationship and early marriage to his previous relationship with Rory. Again, he felt manipulated and used by her, and did get emotionally cheated on, so this could have had an affect on him psychologically, which prompted him to have communication and restricted problems in his next relationship. We also see him interacting with Rory in Season 4, and there are many times where it seems like Dean believes Rory still has feelings for him. She confides in him during her break down in S4E14, the fact she was able to be so vulnerable around Dean must shock him because this is the stuff you confined in a partner, not a friend. S4E17, Rory calls Dean during her spring break (Technically Madeline called him, but he called back and Rory and him talked), which opened their line of communication and made their bond deepen. Now Dean is thinking: Hey Rory is thinking about me when she isn't in school, I wonder what that could be about. Maybe it's nothing, but I'm curious. Then in S4E18, Rory tells Dean how upset she is that he isn't going to school. If I were Dean, I would think she either doesn't like me not going to school because she values education in general, or because she values my education, due to her believing in me. Hence, thinking she still cares about him. And in S4E21, Rory invites Dean to a bar, calling him after a bad 'date', where they share a meal together and she shows him her campus and asks about his marriage. Again, the bells in Dean are ringing: Rory called me to pick her up, when she has other friends. We had dinner, and I walked her to her home... potential romantic relationship. With all of this combined, it's no wonder Dean began to have those romantic feelings for Rory once again, which lead to the affair. Now, yes Dean did lie that both he and Lindsey are in agreement this marriage is not working out. However, we also have to consider that the more of these events Rory had with Dean, it could have put a wedge between Lindsey and Dean's relationship. After all, Lindsey and Dean only began to have problems that we see right after Dean is told not to be with Rory anymore. So, Rory is in fact the major factor as to why the marriage ended, even before the affair. The cheating was just the final nail in the coffin. Now, I'm not fully defending Dean in this situation. He did lie to Rory about the state of his marriage. But I wouldn't go as far to say that Dean manipulated Rory. He truly felt the marriage was over because he wanted it to be true so he could have a reason to sleep with Rory. Ironically, Rory seemed to have been the one to (unintentionally) manipulate Dean with relying on him, spending time with him and showing care for his future. Thus making Dean believes she still feels for him. And when Dean ends up finding out Rory left for Europe after that affair and has to be with Lindsey to make the marriage work... I wouldn't be surprised if Dean felt like he had been used once again. I think the main reason why so many people hate Rory more than Dean is not necessarily the affair, but how the two parties react. When the affair is out, Dean gets kicked out of the house he and Lindsey shared, is forced to go back to his parents and becomes a disgrace. He comes to the realization that he threw away this marriage all for a girl that dump him once, who he thought still had romantic feelings for and allowed himself to be intimate with her, only for her to vanish afterwards. And he has every right to blame himself, because he let it happen. But Rory? She does not feel any guilt to what she did! She even admits that she loved her first time was with Dean! And while she admits that what they did was wrong, she does not feel any regret nor does she apologize to Lindsey. Rory hardly gets any consequences at all, expect for a scolding by Lindsey's mom. To me, that is why the affair with Dean makes her look so terrible, not because of the act but because of how little to no regret she has for what she did. Also, I want to say, I feel so bad for Lindsey, she was just a bystander in all of this and yet she got the most burnt from this whole ordeal. Justice for Lindsey!

[@maximegabriel]

you might be the biggest gilmore girls fan ever, you're memory is insane!! yeah, I agree that the whole affair situation is complicated, and that maybe rory didn't handle it in the best way after.. I just hate how people seem to disregard the fact that dean lied to her about the state of the marriage, and people then singlehandedly blame rory for the ordeal without acknowledging dean's wrongdoings. and you're so right - lindsey deserved so much better!! thanks for the comment 😊 💕

[@arusheetyagi4442]

this is exactly what i think about Dean and Rory altogether, idk why most GG fans hate on Dean so much when they should definitely be disliking Jess more.

[@janellecharles7337]

Unpopular opinion: People tend to forget that Rory's decisions could come from her family's expectations and how Stars Hollow saw her to be. Fans don't always view her character through a psychological lens. Remember, once Rory was born, she didn't automatically start thinking that she was perfect and would rule the world. There is always an influence for Rory to make those crummy choices. It's easy for fans to blame Rory for her behaviour because of the quote, "You make the child, but you don't make their mind!" However, at the beginning of the series, you see how Rory still got that princess treatment from her grandparents, mother, Luke and everyone else in Stars Hollow: a remarkably, gifted child that could do no wrong. Seeing how much her mother and grandparents adore her so much that when the showrunner made her more realistic, Rory uses this treatment to her advantage. Hence, this is why Rory got away with the "Dean affair," the "Jess breakup," "Harvard dropout situation" and many more: there would always be someone there to defend her when she is in the wrong or comfort her when she experiences a massive fall. When you don't allow children to take accountability for their behaviour, they will struggle to cope with criticism and become vulnerable without aid. It makes me sick to my stomach that people just like to pick on annoying habits that Rory does, without knowing that it's the conditions that she grew up with as a child that enable her. Sure no one forces Rory into making these decisions and she doesn't need to. Although, we need to look into a character's life and history and why they act the way they do. Rory comes from a wealthy family (her spoiled tendencies at times), her mother treats her as a best friend and her grandparents set high values for her (comfort, support, and the gifted kid standards). I love Rory, even though I don't agree with her in certain situations, I really admire her as a character. The parenting in this show is the main problem.

[@maximegabriel]

you make such valid points, I loved reading your comment, thank you! hope you enjoyed the video 😊💕

[@janellecharles7337]

@@maximegabriel You are very welcome!

[@umie1359]

I hate that people villainize Rory for dropping out of Yale. I think that was extremely realistic. Mitchum was so out of line for talking to an intern like that. Especially because he never even read her work.

[@maximegabriel]

I absolutely agree with you!! thank you for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video 😊 💞

[@SAN_DRA.33]

Very valid points. Thank you for this video and your perspective

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the video, thanks for commenting! 😊 💖

[@versonification557]

This was an excellent video! I’ve always said I didn’t like post high school Rory, and you definitely made me think about that in a constructive way, and have swayed me. People need to give her more grace, rather than hating her for being human.

[@maximegabriel]

I'm so happy you enjoyed the video! I agree, I feel that we view rory differently when we look at her with empathy :) thanks for your kind comment 😊 💘

[@clairebrown4028]

I definitely agree with this. I think you bring up some great points that many fail to see. Also, that's such an adorable cat!

[@maximegabriel]

awe thank you so much for the nice comment, I'm glad you enjoyed the video! 😊 💘

[@rainy905]

There was a hustle cultural aspect In the early 2000s America and it is still present today. That resulted in the stigma of taking a gap year, or a semester off is viewed as laziness, and immature in their viewpoint. Hence why a lot of audiences criticize Rory for taking time off of Yale because it is not common then.

[@magorzatango6378]

All well said, thank you for doing that. I still think that the part of big anti-Rory debate is bad communication between writers, actress and directors. At some point, Alexis's acting changed. She put a big chunk of her cutesy demeanor to Rory and it did not mix well with the writing. Rory seemed real and down to earth in earlier season and her voice and body language changed in Yale. Paris kept her real demeanor, Rory's pouty face and child-like gestures made the audience interpret her character journey as becoming spoiled. I felt bad for Rory, the minute she stopped being perfect and above her age, her mum took it personally and audience felt just as offended. I liked how sometimes sarcastic, grumpy from sleepless nights or hunger and laid back early Rory could be and I think if Alexis kept that later on, it would be better for the character growth. But I heard her in multiple interviews saying she didn't like nor understand those "weaker" Rory moments. So maybe she didn't dive deeper as an actress to understand the reasoning for such development and didn't sell it.

[@maximegabriel]

wow, I never thought of how alexis' acting had changed throughout the seasons, but now that you mention it - it's so true! thanks for your comment, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💖

[@ranasu9669]

thank you. finally.

[@maximegabriel]

my pleasure hahaha!! glad you enjoyed the video 😊 💘

[@shannonchambers5885]

I definitely agree with you. I never understood the hate and have been defending her for years now.

[@maximegabriel]

im so glad you liked the video! thanks for your comment 😊 💝

[@xEveMoonx]

Thank you so much for making this video, finally some sanity!!! ❤️✨

[@maximegabriel]

awe I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! thank you for your comment 😊 💕

[@abbigailcarr2725]

You know as someone who thinks Rory is maybe not the best person but a good character, I enjoyed hearing this take!

[@maximegabriel]

thanks for the kind comment, I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! 😊 💘

[@Crunchyemuroll]

This was such an interesting perspective. Well done!

[@maximegabriel]

thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed the video 😊 💞

[@sparklyunicorn5431]

Mitchum told her that on purpose to discourage her from her big dreams. It would benefit him either way because she would either dump Logan or be a submissive wife to him.

[@eda7539]

Dude i watched so many analysis videos on gilmore girls and binge watched it for years over and over again, so i thought my view on rory was set. But you really made some good points and we should cut her some slack, I guess in some ways we really resent her for having the life and the opportunities that she has and the way she‘s living it in a HUMAN WAY, but since she was presented to us as perfect its so hard to humanize her actions

[@Lasopamuerte]

This is a very fair take

[@maximegabriel]

thank you so much! 😊 💘

[@margaritaeklund7234]

Really good points!

[@maximegabriel]

awe thanks! I hope you enjoyed the video, thanks for commenting! 😊 💘

[@alexandra28m]

I love Rory and I think she’s an interesting character but she does annoy me sometimes but I also think that’s what makes her an interesting character.

[@ErisWriter]

I think the reason Rory gets so much hate is because she is treated like the only character that can do no wrong. When Jess or Dean mess up they get flack from someone in town. Lorelai is the other protagonist of the show, but her parents are always punching her down no matter what and we see her swallow her pride and apologize even when she isn’t in the wrong. These things make us want to root for her. Meanwhile, Rory doesn’t have anyone like that in her life. Her grandparents dote on her, her mother is extremely protective of her as are most of her friends. She sort of had that in chilton with Paris and the other kids not liking her which is why I think she is more liked when she is younger. She also apologizes for things like when she missed her mother’s graduation. She grounds herself. That adds to her angel like reputation. When she is older though she hardly ever apologizes for her actions! In fact, she expects her grandparents and her mother to always provide for her that it shocks her when they point it out. Instead of apologizing, she makes arguments like she never asked them to do anything for her. That comes off as entitled and not being grateful for the things in her life unlike when she was younger where she always made sure to thank people for helping her and always insisted that they didn’t have to. Lorelai has been stated in the narrative to have lived off of very humble beginnings when she first had Rory and at such a young age that people like to give her a break. Rory has been given the perfect start in life and so her mistakes are a lot more unforgivable. Like when she takes off time in Yale, she doesn’t try to go through life by getting a job and doing things on her own - instead she lives with her rich grandparents and parties with her rich boyfriend. Part of the reason Lorelai is so angry with Rory is because she never would have done something like that when she was younger. She feels like Rory loss sight of what she wanted for herself because she was too busy following Logan’s lifestyle because she thought that was living. I do think some of the hate she receives is unwarranted only because a lot of the fans somehow fall in love with Rory’s love interest and always condemn her while they excuse the boys’ actions. I love flawed characters and especially female characters, I just think they could have written Rory’s story better.

[@kimwicks5540]

I agree with everything you said!!! Actually the main thing that bothers me about Rory is her relationship with Logan. He is so arrogant and thinks he is better than everyone because he has money, he is so rude to people (Rory's friend, Marty, included) and that behavior is something I just can't forgive, especially because I feel he never changes at all. And Rory is just fine with that, she admires him (as a lot of people in the fandom, which I don't understand). It's her relationship with money and status that disappoints me from then on, bc it's not like she is an impressionable kid anymore, and she just goes along with it anyway.

[@kimwicks5540]

And yeah the boat thing was stupid asf

[@maximegabriel]

I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! you make very valid points - logan has never been my favourite boyfriend either.. thanks for your comment 😊 💞

[@elizabethshelby1218]

i agree with everything in this video, but i think the one thing i will never get over is how she treated both Jess and Logan when she visited Jess in Philly with her only intention to cheat on Logan.

[@cosmok-1367]

0:00 I want to start by saying that I will be posting multiple comments on this video in regards to different segments of this video, because I have a lot to say and I don't want to make a very long post, so I'd rather just make multiple for a better clarification of each segment in the video. I watched the Gilmore Girls because my mom loved the show when it first aired, she watched it with my sister and then I got into it. Looking back, I've noticed there are multiple flaws of the series and I can not really watch it with a rose-colored view as I did before. Still, I consider it a guilty pleasure of mine and will put it on in the background. It's one of those shows where you know it's bad, but as long as you don't take to heart the 'values' they try and teach, then I say that's fine. Looking back at Rory, she has many major flaws that I can understand why people hate her years later. It's something we didn't understand upon the first watch, but over time you notice she does get worse. Now, is this hate towards Rory justified? Well, yes but actually no. The thing is, there are multiple factors that should be taken into account when we look at Rory. While she does become a terrible person over the course of the seasons, she didn't get there on her own. There were many influences in her life that drove her to such a mess as the series progresses, but most of them are hardly really discussed upon. Like Lorelei, Richard and Emily's parenting styles, to the influences of her boyfriends and even the environments and friends she grew up with. There's also the factor of Rory's school life and how that ends up affecting her, as well as trying to achieve a dream she has no ambition for: Being a journalist. I do appreciate that Rory is a very realistic depiction of those who believe they are smart due to having high grades and peaking in high school, but when they go into the real world, it's not like what they expected. And seeing her fail in life, while sad, is understandable given the choices she made. However, that is something I think Gilmore Girls always baffled me on. I think what makes Gilmore Girls so confusing is that it was trying to have it's cake and eat it to. Where it seemed to be a sort of comfort show of a fantasy like life (Living in a small town and having a large family with money for support), but it also tried to incorporate real life concepts and consequences (Love life, family trauma, and dealing with grief and disappointment) and to me, it didn't really sit well. I'm not saying you can't have comedy or wackiness mixed with harsh reality, but I just think GG has a hard time balancing it out. Probably because the harshness of real life doesn't truly come in until like season 4-5... Until then, it just seemed like a feel good show where everything would work out for our main characters. Gilmore Girls was a confusing show for me, because it always felt like it was going back and fourth between what it seemed to be selling vs. what it was becoming. GG tries to make it seem like this fantastical world of a small town charm, but then you have harsh reality of being in a corporate office and facing harsh and biased criticism. It tries to sell itself as feminist and female empowering, but it ends up putting down many of the female characters who aren't part of the main cast. It tries to show people can improve and be better, but it never really addresses the flaws the main cast have and they don't even try to better their own short comings. I think because of this confusing changes of the themes, it's always been hard for me to know where Rory would go. And while we can see Rory failing later on as realistic, it is also sad and disappointing because it never seemed like the show was setting her up to fail. What's more, it seems really damaging to a lot of people who can relate to Rory, because those like her probably believe that it is because of Rory's ambition and over-working that made her fail, rather than her reckless and selfish choices. To me, it's not the fact that Rory has flaws that is the problem, I like that she has them because they make her relatable. The problem is, she never learns to overcome these problems and become a better person over the years.

[@maximegabriel]

you have no idea how much I liked reading your comment!! I love your point of view, you make so many great points! I totally agree that many people and factors (like her grandparents and lorelai) influence rory's personal development throughout the series, sometimes for the worst.. and you're so right about how the show kind of set rory up for failure - they made her too perfect too early on, so that there was no way to go but down.. thanks for commenting, I hope you enjoyed the video! 😊 💕

[@rebek18]

Didn’t agree with everything but I understand where u are coming from. Enjoyed your video and vibe😊

[@maximegabriel]

​@@rebek18 awe I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! hahaha I don't blame you - I know some of my takes are a bit unpopular lol!! thanks for commenting 😊💘

[@abhaya_ananth]

Great points. Completely agree with everything you said!

[@maximegabriel]

thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed the video 😊 💞