INFJ | THE 5 REACTIONS PEOPLE HAVE MEETING AN INFJ FOR THE FIRST TIME

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@Foxy64 7 ай бұрын

Although i didnt realise it at the time , but looking back now , i recall a time when i was 15 years old and being told by a teacher that i would amount to nothing in life ,. My reaction even at that age , was emotionless , and i think my obvious contempt for his words angered him , or even unerved him as he was used to utter compliance with "Authority".. an INFJ was born that day , we dont do compliance or conformity , we go our own way , we are our own Authority, we are not intimidated by anybody , because we are always 2 steps in front , its not arrogance , we just are

@KingDomsKingdom85 7 ай бұрын

Somehow they haven't died yet made me chuckle, thats incredibly accurate 😂

@djackman4229 7 ай бұрын

What I dislike as an infj is that people's initial confusion can quickly morph into their feeling uncomfortable and negative, they turn towards and are supported by the many they are si milar to and can emphasise with, and start exercising a silent exclusion of the infj.

@imdjc4 7 ай бұрын

Herein lies the problem. They have an emphasis on hate - hence the morphing. They don't have enough of positive foundation to feel comfortable going that route. Haters hate. The good ones see your worth and admire your being.

@djackman4229 6 ай бұрын

@@imdjc4 Absolutely true.

@daltwin4046 3 ай бұрын

Yessss! This happens so much to me! It bothers me often. When they truly get to know me they love me. But I can unfortunately be initially off putting to most even though I do absolutely nothing to trigger that.

@leonorabrandscheit 7 ай бұрын

We can make people feel soo intensly seen, their sides, that they didn't even knew about themselves, that we unravel, but when they hurt us, they don't exists anymore. these extremes are horrible and i know it hurts them, but not cutting contact hurts me more.

@BKandtheUnderstanding 7 ай бұрын

The envy one sucks, because even friends at times will become envious that we are so free and independent, thinking we’re being contrary to the person they thought they knew when we aren’t complying to some social rules they believe everyone is supposed to live by.

@vincentkretzschmar4988 7 ай бұрын

It's a compliment in a way

@johnstorton 7 ай бұрын

"... we aren’t complying to some social rules they believe everyone is supposed to live by." I had a college English teacher tell me I was an iconoclast. I had no idea what an iconoclast was. When I looked it up, I was kinda shocked. "OMG! She's spot on!" I didn't know there was a word for it, or even that it was a thing! I guess the definition of "iconoclast" is inherently incorporated into the definition of "INFJ."

@BKandtheUnderstanding 7 ай бұрын

@@johnstortonYes! I forgot about "iconoclast!" Great word. I also learned it in a college literature course. 🤓

@johnstorton 7 ай бұрын

@@BKandtheUnderstanding Cool! :)

@johnkeller5163 7 ай бұрын

Frankly, the very best approach that I feel satisfied about new people is to simply be honest to myself in expression, allowing the results to naturally occur. This avoids the difficult and confusing projection that others may mix into an encounter with an INFJ. Keep healthy boundaries and hold negativity in public at a distance. This becomes easier in time by not caring about being alone, staying in the no drama zone, until truly being around people that appreciate candor and want to know the actual INFJ in front of them. I have found that this is why I personally prefer face to face communication with new people, knowing that nearly all actual communication is nonverbal.

@DearYoungerSelf111 7 ай бұрын

Beautifully said ❤ - Do you mind expounding on "holding negativity" in public?

@johnkeller5163 7 ай бұрын

@@DearYoungerSelf111 Yes, this is an idiomatic phrase in American English; the complete quote here which I wrote is ""hold negativity in public at a distance". To keep anything at a distance would be synonymous to "distancing oneself" implying to not be physically close to an object (such as hypothetically harmful radiation or chemicals) or also in this case, guarding one's boundaries energetically from negatively emotional or toxic people's energy to avoid painful or harmful drama. One trait of most young INFJ types is to not only quickly understand another person's mood but also to sympathize and.feel the problems as to be affected badly especially during projection an INFJ receives very easily (in reference to Wenzes' video topic diacuasion here).

@themountainsandthesea4121 7 ай бұрын

Thank you.

@DearYoungerSelf111 7 ай бұрын

@johnkeller5163 this is why I love my tribe! Thoughtful words to aid in understanding- Much love

@johnkeller5163 7 ай бұрын

@@DearYoungerSelf111 Well, thank you! I am GenX and can assure you that life gets so much easier and more fun as INFJs get older, wiser, and stronger. There are other decent channels about INFJs but Wenzes is the best with thoughtful wisdom and candor which is provocative yet empathetic to unique INFJ challenges.

@themountainsandthesea4121 7 ай бұрын

Yes, we are good at helping others feel understood/ we dont get that in return from others most of the time: so, time to do it for ourselves!🎉

@amjPeace 7 ай бұрын

I admire that you have done all the work to figure all this out and then to share it with the world. I'm in my 70's and am only now understanding my journey. I've never been happier than I am at this time in my life since I've learned how to accept and love myself just the way I am. I try very hard to prevent others from raining on my parade. I'm not totally immune to getting my feelings hurt but now recognize that the disaproval or disappointment others may feel is their problem, not mine because I know I am staying true to my morals and values. When I realize someone is only manipulating me or being two-faced, when I realize their capacity for friendship is limited it saddens me but ultimately I am now my own best friend. I'm in awe of how you have received and interpreted your insights at such a young age, and I'm very grateful for the way you explain all the nuances in ways that will help INFJ's to navigate this epic life which is available to all of us if we learn to avoid the pitfalls.

@johnstorton 7 ай бұрын

"But guess what? - They don't know us, yet." 💥 I felt that!! Love it!!

@DearYoungerSelf111 7 ай бұрын

12:56 I now have discovered a phrase for this tendency "intellectizualize feelings" - I bypass feeling my emotions and apply logic to them - No More because thru Wenzes' teaching - I recognize I am not responsible for someone elses emotions and if they react/respond to me in a way I dont like - I am responding with the same energy - in this instance bypassing my logic and honoring how it felt in the moment and giving them a dose of their own medicine. When I am picking up on other peoples emotion, my default reaction is to respond to what I pick up on (theyre sad let me buy their fav ice cream) but now (its not always easy) I tell myself "I am not responsible for fixing how they feel" and "My well being matters more - keep living"

@macoeur1122 7 ай бұрын

OMG, it is so true that we can put so much focus on how others are feeling, and do so at our own expense… That is, until we recognize what we are doing. If I could only share one piece of advice with all INFJs, it would be to recognize this as early in their life as possible. Once we truly "see it", we can correct it, and once we've corrected for it we'll never go back.

@chrislim7976 7 ай бұрын

As you get older hopefully you don't need others to understand you. It would be nice, but at the same time it's ok. I'm very well with my care, empathy, intuition, deep thinking, altruistic judging, quiet aura as well as my infj doorslam rage. Once you are comfortable with your strengths which include knowing your weaknesses - it's a whole new and better world. Do not feel bad about the feelings we absorb and the everpresent hope we have. ❤

@Miguel_angel_7 7 ай бұрын

I really dont care about other people think about me, i appreciate myself and thats enough for me.

@myhalflifecrisis 7 ай бұрын

Spot on as always! I’ve noticed the 5th step very early in my life, it was heartbreaking 💔 when I was younger… today I still don’t like it, but I’m unapologetically happy to be the person I’m meant to be.

@DMAC1301 7 ай бұрын

Those that do not understand that kindness is not a thing done to get anything back. It burns me out. I end up spending time needing to recover and do nothing for a while. It’s irritating for others to see me the way they do. I don’t see myself as any more special than anyone else. It’s their lack of belief is their problem it’s not mine.

@GG-rk1bu 7 ай бұрын

Has anyone seen that channel INFj Circle? That guy seems to be covering a lot of Wenzes' content. Even the titles are the same! He hasn't even referenced Wenzes as an inspiration - he's obviously used her content to form his own.

@VyctoriaBrooks 6 ай бұрын

That's terrible. Maybe he should be reported?

@Name_Lessness 7 ай бұрын

It's become harder to find a "want". It's an enlightened practice to no longer want and to be content with what is. I'm more interested in being rather than having. I've noticed that when someone does enter a relationship with me their life and personality changes drastically. I'm aware when meeting new people that I don't want or need anything from them and they'll realize how uninterested I am in them...

@mlbullbooks 7 ай бұрын

Agree with all of these. Numbers two and five are unfortunately the main ones INFJs experience in my opinion, but I refuse to play a role just to make someone else feel good. I’m staying true to who I am. Certain aspects of myself are non-negotiable-period.

@kobra4422 7 ай бұрын

I've been getting extreme reactions on me all the time and I couldn't understand why. Men gave me attention for no reason and women attacked me. I tried to be as invisible as possible but it didn't work. It caused me massive social anxiety. Now I've learned people can sense your aura and who you are. People see your worth even if you don't see it. That's why insecure people see you as a threat. More evolved people show curiosity and respect.

@vincentkretzschmar4988 7 ай бұрын

Jeez the last one makes me want to cry tears of joy

@Everyshade515 7 ай бұрын

From what I've seen, you are one of the absolute best out there. Thanks for everything, truly :)

@UpcycleDesignLab 7 ай бұрын

I took the Myers Briggs test over 20 years ago and to be honest there have been times when I completely appreciated being an INFJ and other times that I have really resented it. I think I have mastered the confusing people reaction. 😂😂 Thanks for making these videos. Cheers Cindy

@endlesspower23 7 ай бұрын

Ok I was slightly on the fence about being one until you mentioned listening to other people's music lol

@sunshinesunflowerz1647 7 ай бұрын

🩷🩷 Thank you, Wenzes. 1: Confusion 2: Neediness 3: Admiration 4: Kinship 5: Envy

@themountainsandthesea4121 7 ай бұрын

Yep🎉

@lindateuling7862 7 ай бұрын

I've been on the receiving end of all five of these reactions, especially #1 and #5. I learned a lot and have done a lot of things similar to what you mentioned on this video. But it was learned without much help from knowledge of Myers Briggs. It's not that the test was unknown on those days - in fact, the test came out about two or three years before I was born - but it wasn't as well known back then. So I had to work out a way to (1) understand myself better and (2) work out a strategy and useful system to cope - mostly on trial and error. I can agree with all of the advice and counsel that you give here, Wenzes. Implementing your advice can save a lot of time and be a rewarding experience

@mayhawthorn5092 7 ай бұрын

Wow, immense gratitude to you

@MBAinternetmktg 7 ай бұрын

Thank you for improving the poster by taking off all the heavy ink. The poster can be further improved by just having the five titles and paragraphs, without all the graphics that take up so much space.

@themountainsandthesea4121 7 ай бұрын

Yes, i am not relying on that. Been doing that for tio long.

@jillsilsbee3830 3 ай бұрын

Great Video

@Carlos-du1zv 7 ай бұрын

Thanks i needed to hear this right on this moment 😊

@shashankkasliwal6381 7 ай бұрын

Super Wenzes ❤

@jean-francoisgagnon680 7 ай бұрын

You have the better life in the world to have time whith us

@RememberTrueStyle 3 ай бұрын

Thank you!

@Megan-p5j8k 7 ай бұрын

Wenzes you are awesome. I am going to check out your program. ❤🕊️🌈🦋

@sigmainfjbulgaria4478 7 ай бұрын

#1 I know that this is because of the nature of my Ni and I have always been proud of it. Let them be confuse if they want to be and never risk your confidence and progress to explain what is unexplainable to them. #2 Yep and that's how one-sided relationships begin. We have to be careful with this. Just be more exhibit of your sigma and introverted side and let the other person know that you are not such an easy going character for everything. #3, 4 It will be easy to say just don't depersonalize your self, but I know it's hard. We have to train it every day. #5 An envy person doesn't letting you as close as you want to be and you don't have to know what the exact problem is, you just have to apply the 50-50 rule. Never try to give more than you get. If you fill coldness react with the same coldness in return.