It's My Right to Hold This Turd

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If you think about it, aren’t turd holders the true persecuted minority?
FOLLOW THE CAST:
ALLY: / lilbeardsley
GRANT: / grantob
KATIE: / katiemarovitch
TRAPP: / mikewtrapp
RAPH: / chestangraphael
REKHA: / rekhalshankar
BRENNAN: / brennanlm
SAM: / samreich
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CAST
Brennan Lee Mulligan
Mike Trapp
Raphael Chestang
Grant O'Brien
Rekha Shankar
Katie Marovitch
CREW
Director - Greg Stees
Writer - Brennan Lee Mulligan
Producer - Francesca McLafferty
Production Coordinator - Olivia Aguilar
Director of Photography - Skyler Rousselet
Production Designer - Chloe Badner
HMU - Denise R. Valentine
Sound Mixer - Anthony Kozlowski
Editor - Mike McAlister

[@diran0]

This was the most politically charged poop sketch of all time

[@TheOnlyGamingMC]

lel

[@Rougarou99]

I would say it is in the top hundred.

[@justapassingperson6546]

(Insert political joke here)

[@realbland]

you clearly havent watched black scientologists

[@vanhunts6238]

@@realbland TURN THAT POOP! INTO WINE!

[@Khandrake]

"Word magic that he learned from a fountain of lies" the writer of that line should be insanely proud

[@muhammadsmith5792]

It was Brennan (of course it was)

[@ChristopherCraven]

What is the fountain of lies a direct metaphor for though?

[@potatomajesty5255]

Christopher Craven Probably the media

[@ChristopherCraven]

@@potatomajesty5255 I don't know how I didn't realise that. I was trying to think of a literal fountain. I hope I was just tired xD

[@tomoyodaidouji100]

Wasmo damn one away from 666

[@sananaryon4061]

"It's word magic he learned from a fountain of lies" "Your word sorcery ends now" I'll be using all of these quotes for a DnD campaign sooner or later

[@LuminousOriens]

Have you used them?

[@sananaryon4061]

@@LuminousOriens Not yet, unfortunately

[@panpan3303]

Unearth arcana: school of Onomancy

[@Silverwind87]

@@panpan3303 also Glibness

[@Grady_Oconnell]

This whole video is a nat 1 charm person

[@JadedOne420]

Brennan is so calm and complacent in that one scene- _One could say he really has his shit together._

[@dafphtthedislikeupdater7836]

underrated as we speak

[@Ubercentraltf2]

Underrated comment

[@Sophia048]

Wish I could like this twice

[@gerchmen]

BOOM!

[@The_Huntsman]

M*****f******

[@meatblade]

This is, by far, the most sophisticated shitpost I've ever seen.

[@akajaeee]

Good one

[@Constellation3232]

"HE LEARNED HOW TO ARGUE FROM THE INTERNET"

[@shadyacr]

Mfin word magic

[@vikatchu6683]

Me_irl

[@jasoncordova7993]

NO HE DIDN'T

[@Silverwind87]

"Let's compromise. How about he only holds half a turd?" "Sounds good to me." "No! He shouldn't be holding any poop!" "See? You can't compromise with these extremists."

[@americantoastman7296]

"how about we just do a LITTLE genocide"

[@HenirHerrscher]

Jesus christ i hope im missing a joke here because this is absolutely not how a centrist's opinion works. They agree to some parts of the political scale and take their opinion from both sides. It's like they like group 1's opinion on issue A but perfer group 2's opinion on issue B. If you ask a centrist "what's your opinion on ripping a baby into pieces and not doing that" they won't answer "uh i prefer the baby ripped in half into just 2 pieces"

[@PRIVACYISAZOMBIE]

@@HenirHerrscher Stop being reasonable it's youtube. Just throw some turds you'll fit in better.

[@danieljames6138]

Austin Yau Raph is the centrists, Brennan is the right

[@nin2494]

​@@HenirHerrscher I'm pretty sure centrists aren't the ones to bring up insane topics like holding poop... I don't know why you jumped to that conclusion.

[@yoursleepparalysisdemon8752]

All jokes aside, this does show how incredibly easy it is to twist words when debating

[@D3monB4dger8]

I’ve watched this vid a few times but I didn’t really realise how much it represents people who are just blatantly wrong on the internet. They try to seem intelligent and calm (which works a disturbing amount of the time) but they are actually being offensive and wrong. Yes, opinions are technically subjective BUT there are some very obviously exceptions.

[@philheltut265]

Depends how you look at it. If you were an advanced ai you would think like this and over years and years of machine learning you would reach the truth by thinking like this. It’s because we are in a social system and we are animals. You wouldn’t want this guy in your office but you wouldn’t want the planet to be governed by the other 5 people because sometimes doing things like killing and “holding turds” (using the method of reduction ad absurdum aka finding truth by eliminating all possible alternatives). So technically he is correct, what if an entire office were turd holders and thought turds smelled good? Morality and truth are not mutually exclusive. Yea I’m that guy and yea you don’t want me at your party but you’d want me there if everybody was convincing you that holding a turd is beneficial to the group. Just think about that deeply. Sorry if it’s depressing or sounds mean but it’s not. People like this have a role in society and it’s very important despite the implications it has on everyday people. I digress❤

[@philheltut265]

But I digress*

[@_.violyse._]

​@@philheltut265 I'm not sure what you mean. for one, advanced A.I. wouldn't necessarily come to some objectively correct conclusion, as the information it extrapolates off of is human data - consequently, it carries human biases. we've seen quite a few instances of racism from modern A.I., in fact. on the second point, while *rhetoric* skills are valuable, a person who insists on using them to spread harmful ideas is of active detriment to society. intelligence and evil is a dangerous combination, and I would much rather an inept but decent person at the wheel than someone with the intellectual capability to enact the harm they wish to cause with optimal effectiveness.

[@baconsir1159]

It’s also a pretty good example of false equivalence

[@chickensangwich97]

Brennan never tries to have an actual conversation about holding a turd. He only ever engages in a meta-conversation about everyone else presuming it's wrong for him to hold a turd. They presume so because it is obviously true, so Brennan can only argue that it's wrong to close the discussion of the issue. He never actually argues that holding the turd is right. If he tried to actually engage with "is there any good reason for me to hold this turd?" he would immediately lose the debate. Whenever you're dealing with people like this, always ask: are they having the conversation, or the meta-conversation?

[@scepta101]

Precisely. To the turd-holders of the world, it’s about controlling the conversation so you never have to meaningfully defend your position

[@calebjensen6654]

It always makes me think hardcore misdirection, exceptionally used by the worst of us.

[@abhyudaykrishna9714]

lmfao so so true, very well put. it's a weird problem with discourse online especially that only seems to be growing all the time: the meta nature of how people talk about topics or issues; everything is a reaction to something else and there is no basis or grounding of the discussion in any core ideas, much less material reality. it's truly enough to drive one insane

[@timgalivan2846]

So wrong, he has the right to hold that turd. That's why there's no law against it. He only crossed a line when he smeared it on someone's face. Whenever you use a weak argument like, because it's obviously true, you depart from rational discourse and enter into the realm of kindergarten logic. All rights should be maintained until there is a good enough reason to restrict them. If everything was illegal until good reason was given to make it legal, the world would be a very strange place. (Ok it is already a strange place but it would be much stranger)

[@samrapine4615]

@@timgalivan2846 LA municipal code, section 41.47.2, "Urinating or Defecating in Public". Good enough reasons include salmonella and shigella, for starters. While the base tapestry of society expects that the taboo of shitting at your desk and carrying it around is "obviously true", we're fortunate enough to have it woven to legal framework for folks stuck on the stoa.

[@kahlelisaiah7295]

The continuity of trapps broken laptop gets me so hard

[@keenanma5537]

Kahlel Isaiah when does that start?

[@RomyHavivi]

@@keenanma5537 I think in the "best burger"

[@NadeExists]

It start in ‘When a kink chooses you’

[@RomyHavivi]

@@NadeExists ohhhh right!

[@hallowacko]

I've never noticed this!

[@processpsych]

I love the fact that this entire sketch is a hilariously convincing poop metaphor for Karl Popper's paradox of tolerance. Well played, gang. Well played.

[@koral.arthouse]

in this sketch it's more like Karl Pooper

[@estherb.redshaw6540]

@@koral.arthouse i fucking love this

[@neothepenguin1257]

@@koral.arthouse I verbally laughed aloud thanks

[@Beegrene]

It works on a lot of levels. Because the cast let him get away with holding a turd for so long, he was able to slowly escalate. If they had killed him right from the start, nobody would have had poop smeared on their faces or put in their mouths.

[@joehair3446]

When you are tolerant of everything, you stand for nothing

[@the_melon_apocalypse_2711]

"I'm over here, cool as a cucumber, holding my turd" is my new favourite sentence

[@Zarmdthecoolest]

Now I'm holding two turds 😄

[@patty5097]

I agree

[@wootzor1417]

Fun fact: Poop is actually classified as a biological weapon

[@SohanDsouza]

Well, shit.

[@trevorhouff1173]

@@SohanDsouza shit indeed

[@BaBooTubeVideos]

Why is your profile picture upside-down?

[@bigdickmcgee3293]

the turd is a metaphor

[@numberbndl3763]

Il Duce wait really?

[@lipamanka]

This should be called "how to use all of the fallacies in one argument"

[@lordbuss]

Except both sides do it here.

[@jackd6269]

@@lordbuss mans defending the turd holder

[@lordbuss]

@@jackd6269 Holding turds is bad. It's obviously bad. And yet no one said to him the simple phrase "it's not your right to do things if it violates our rights", and when he started to blame for irrationality (which was hypocritical, but true), the reaction was "don't listen to word magic and mind poison". If "things that we don't like are lies even if they are logical" is not a fallacy, then nothing is. I don't defend the turd holder. I just say that the enemy if the turd holder are also wrong about everything (though it is less dangerous, of course, because they don't hold turds).

[@lordbuss]

@Fe Cu Right-wingers are not the only ones who have fallacies. Also, not all right-wingers have opinions that are equal to holding a turd, only the extreme ones.

[@alewis17]

@@lordbuss true...however most of them are "Ralphs" who perpetuates their "Holding turds"...take out the ones fueling them...take out the turd holders

[@durdleduc8520]

A genuinely disturbing metaphor for a genuinely important problem.

[@dizzyguy101]

What do you mean by disturbing

[@alyssa2807]

@@dizzyguy101 Umm they (s)he means, DISTURBING

[@williamwu6329]

In all seriousness, he was wrong from the beginning since his turd would be infringing on the coworkers health, ability to do work and overall happiness. No joke, the turd could be classified as a bioweapon, especially when he smeared it on Traps face and placed it into Ralph’s moth. Idk what kinda metaphor you’re referring to but I hope its not godamn Nazis.

[@cane9965]

@@williamwu6329 Exactly! Also, he acted without consent! Which is a disregard of other people's behalf. You know what else forces without consent? Rape, murder and dictatorship. So... In conclusion... Brennan is a Nazi. Flawless logic. I know.

[@DrOooable]

@William Wu *Raph's mouth

[@krhodes866]

“So much for the tolerant left 😒” literally killed me Jesus

[@DrRiq]

RIP kaleb

[@Zelink108]

Jorge Mehdi They aren’t tolerant of INTOLERANCE, which is what the Right is.

[@mduckernz]

@@jorgemehdi3397 Ah yes, the regular "let's just ignore the entirety of Europe and the other Commonwealth Western nations, in favour of BUT VENEZUELA!!! 11one!", just as this very video implied lol

[@Zelink108]

Jorge Mehdi Communism has never been properly implemented in human history because of tyrants seizing the ideal and using it to manipulate a desperate populace. It came incredibly close, however, under Yugoslavia's rule under Joseph Broz Tito, who implemented more of a nationalist style of communism, and it worked remarkably well for as long as Tito lived. But the core reason why communism has never actually been accomplished is because every regime that falseheartedly claims to be communist lacks a much-needed absence of state, class and capital. However, a direct jump to communism isn't always the answer. A legitimate socialist state would work impeccably well for the moment being, seeing as how socialism is supposed to be a stepping stone towards communism anyhow. Don't believe what your Western 'Murican textbooks tell you. They distort history to a rather ugly degree.

[@Zelink108]

Jorge Mehdi Communism has never been properly implemented in human history because of tyrants seizing the ideal and using it to manipulate a desperate populace. It came incredibly close, however, under Yugoslavia's rule under Joseph Broz Tito, who implemented more of a nationalist style of communism, and it worked remarkably well for as long as Tito lived. But the core reason why communism has never actually been accomplished is because every regime that falseheartedly claims to be communist lacks a much-needed absence of state, class and capital. However, a direct jump to communism isn't always the answer. A legitimate socialist state would work impeccably well for the moment being, seeing as how socialism is supposed to be a stepping stone towards communism anyhow. Don't believe what your Western 'Murican textbooks tell you. They distort history to a rather ugly degree.

[@Alex-tb5xm]

“Mind poison. He learned how to argue from the internet.”

[@Sceusell]

when you share your opinion on reddit

[@krissypizzo]

One of my favorite takeaways from this video 😀

[@sananaryon4061]

"Word magic he learned from a fountain of lies"

[@Lancaster604]

He learned how to argue from Shapiro lol

[@stephenking5852]

Is this mocking SJWs?

[@christinajackson2662]

It’s delightful how well this has aged **cries in 2020** **and 2021 🙄** **and 2022 🤦🏻‍♀️**

[@elliotwinton7550]

"They're making us wear masks, its basically what the nazi's did" Me: What!?!

[@brendankendall41]

@@elliotwinton7550 *First, the gas masks... Then, the gas chambers!*

[@Thessalin]

There there. Don't worry. 2022 is way worse. Hello from the future!

[@PeruvianSmore]

Thessalin STOP! STOP RIGHT NOW! NO!

[@callaschiefelbein3825]

**cries in 2021**

[@forevorseal]

*mind poison, he learned how to argue from the internet*

[@diviini]

Poison*

[@aydensauvageau9393]

Nice pic

[@forevorseal]

@@aydensauvageau9393 thanks :)

[@mohammedavdul5247]

Yeah and there are people like this:leftist

[@CPiz321]

Deku!

[@criminalchip2772]

Brennan: "all of these guys are extremely upset" Grant: gets more upset

[@Silverwind87]

Nothing is more upsetting than someone condescendingly saying you're upset.

[@sourwitch2340]

@@Silverwind87 yup. or insinuating that you being upset undermines your entire argument and that you should really just stop being upset, because they won't take you seriously while you're upset, except that your being upset is a direct expression of the fact that this shit IS serious. nothing more upsetting than that.

[@KALAMARK0]

WHY...why did you have to add that sound effect every time he squished the piece of shit.

[@utsavmanandharz156]

Comedic effect. Worked pretty good.

[@commentcopbadge6665]

Uh..... it's called "realism"? Helloooo?

[@Andythenurse]

Funny wasn't it?

[@revimfadli4666]

@@commentcopbadge6665 sorry, not all of us are familiar with how squishing a turd sounds like

[@commentcopbadge6665]

Revi M Fadli And I'm so sorry that those who are not, are so uncultured. LOL!!!

[@jyavant]

The CEO of everything has really fell rock bottom.

[@TateWasHere]

i don't get it.

[@kaam..]

@@TateWasHere he's the guy who's the CEO in all of their honest commercial sketches.

[@David-et7qy]

Step up from moviepass

[@forresthopkinsa]

No I'm pretty sure he's perfectly in character

[@Commanderziff]

Frankly, this might have been his finest hour. This was the most in control he's ever been.

[@etherursoul]

If Brennan is in the thumbnail I’m clicking

[@thebeingdestroyerofworlds8690]

Trapp for me

[@agnimaya...]

Same.

[@vexxama]

Etherursoul he has been killing it since he came on

[@RyanLynch1]

mood now

[@juhis5936]

Am I the only one who dislikes Brennan

[@zerumsparklez9956]

When he put in Raph’s mouth, I got physically ill. I immediately wanted to throw up.

[@GuitarGuy057]

You are weak and must be protected.

[@bippinflykefifenhest9003]

@@GuitarGuy057 "So much for the tolerant left!"

[@akayysworld]

Same that was awful

[@Haja024]

You just have to remember that it's chocolate and the squishy sounds were edited it. Though it's still some disgusting shit.

[@ChestersonJack]

Same here

[@dabestbreez0076]

That’s The Weirdest Notification I’ve Ever Gotten

[@Morning3309]

Yup

[@orangecayman520]

Ikr

[@grassie8658]

yeah

[@PotatoCrusader982]

True

[@King_Of_Khaos]

Anyone found the code

[@evanblake5252]

Holy shit... It's just like the arguments I get into on the internet. Glad somebody else hates it.

[@mullerpotgieter]

Let him hold his turds. Let he be judged for holding a turd. But when he tries to put a turd in your mouth, have him sent to an asylum

[@samodelkini]

Exactly, the moment he does something other than holding the turd, he can be punished.

[@evanblake5252]

Not exactly what I was going for, assuming I'm reading your comment correctly. I'm more talking about how people I argue with online use mental gymnastics and make shit up to try to sound smarter or more credible. Like they were saying in this video, word trickery.

[@evanblake5252]

Or they throw out strawmen or allusions and references.

[@sleepy-peepy]

Muller Potgieter Oh so he can HOLD a turd but the second he puts a little it’s bit of feces into someone’s mouth it’s all “send him to the asylum”? What happened to open mindedness? Diversity of opinion? So much for the tolerant left.

[@obamanewsnetwork914]

*YOUR WORD SORCERY ENDS NOW*

[@buttonmasher7615]

What if that is a code for the site?

[@enzuki]

The instant I saw this the video said that

[@seignee]

The real winner here is CollegeHumor, because now, they get to revel in the fact that they made actual humans debate poop-holding rights seriously.

[@ziwuri]

That's the day job of thousands if not millions of people on this big ol rock.

[@onijaradu]

This is by far the best sketch ever. This is such a confusing time right now and i really feel like this sketch shows perfectly how messed up the time that we live now really is. 10/10 best sketch of 2018. Thank you college humor

[@SaulmanEve]

You sweet summer child

[@jbob4996]

Well about that...

[@thekingoffailure9967]

Ah, I remember being this innocent like it was only a year ago....

[@nicelyput299]

Umm no. Not even close. It dragged a ten second point over four minutes using shit as a tool for comedy. It was awful

[@SamyasaSwi]

O we had no idea

[@Tomas-xv8ih]

Katie: **Gets uncomfortable because Brennan is holding a Turd** Also Katie: **Takes a shit while everyone is "flirting" with her**

[@ilovequiktrip3110]

Why the quotes around "flirting"? Those boys were definitely all flirting with her.

[@banditraccoon8476]

I feel attacked every time I hold a turd at work :(

[@bleh1569]

YES XD

[@macinsplince]

I miss the old collegehumor before the intense far left wing bias......

[@morbidblade]

They were always far left. You just grew up.

[@KayOScode]

@@macinsplince I think this one was actually making fun of the left and how they talk about tolerating everything.

[@PikerMusic]

Bandit Raccoon the last time I held a turd I was called a “weirdo” and an “idiot” all I want to do is hold a turd IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!

[@justanotherdude4168]

This sketch was always relevant and yet ahead of its time lmao

[@aaronwalton8057]

"What is he doing with words?" I love Grant. LOL

[@MeanBeanComedy]

aaron walton I loved him too, but his Twitter is a shitshow.

[@farkbett699]

I was expecting Katy to hold the turd

[@licitchaos]

No, she leaves them in her pants.

[@yagyu09]

where do u think he got them from?? O_O

[@forevorseal]

@@licitchaos I'm glad people got the reference

[@Stephensofceea]

I know right?

[@cranberryjuice3998]

Shes the only one that doesnt hold it.

[@metaphysicalgb8962]

"So much for the tolerant left!" THAT KILLED ME!!

[@stephenking5852]

Why would he do that to Raph!?! He was taking his side!

[@connor-bj6ku]

@@stephenking5852 Part of the metaphor. People hold poop, lure some people into think it's reasonable, and then they get shit in their mouths

[@alyssa2807]

@@connor-bj6ku Right... 😂😂😂

[@Eva-uw6uo]

Did anyone notice Raph also punched him with his left hand?

[@merry8647]

"I don't like your metaphors" is a genius last line

[@douglasphillips5870]

In my day ,we just flushed turds down the toilet. No debate needed.

[@sdgdhpmbp]

If you haven't noticed, we've progressed past such small-minded prejudice. I, an intellectual, am proudly holding a turd in my mouth. Why? Because it's my freedom.

[@KaregoAt]

And they got commended for it. Now, suggesting we flush them down the toilet like we should is regarded as a ridiculous idea. After all, they're just turds with different opinions, shouldn't we be tolerant? Not like they're hurting anyone? ...yet?

[@BigT.Larrity]

I read that in Scruffy's voice

[@WashashoreProd]

As I recall, in my grandfather's day there was a huge fight over turd-holding and it ended with all the turds getting flushed. Even the one that someone said they were just asked to hold by someone else. I would have thought there was some kind of consensus that we simply do not hold turds, but it seems we have begun to forget. I really don't want to see a Turd World War.

[@absol5194]

Ok boomer

[@BreadLoeuf]

“First they came from the people holding the turds.” I actually just read that poem. lmao

[@ryane3703]

Crazy how Americans always leave out the first line of that poem

[@24601st]

Ryan E its because most americans dont speak german

[@arceuslordofcreation8824]

*for

[@ibnbattuta7031]

@@24601st the first few lines were about them coming for the multiple leftwing groups, and many Americans believe that the Nazi's were Socialists.

[@24601st]

Ishir Mehra yeah but iirc the original was written in german

[@spencerberg7477]

“So it’s fine to yell at me for holding a turd but I can’t hold a turd without being yelled at, double standards?

[@Mithorium]

Raph failed his saving throw on Brennan's mind poison

[@clockworkkirlia7475]

Fortunately, most such charming effects grant an extra saving throw after the caster performs a hostile action against the target. As we see here.

[@StraveTube]

"... And I want you to do it without resorting to raising your voice. Do you think you can do that?" "NRAANNANNNUH-"

[@danakanafina3615]

He also should've said something along the lines "Everyone is so sensitive and soft these days you can't even hold a turd in public"

[@un-ironicproductions6096]

This skit really teases people who try oppose the left.

[@danakanafina3615]

Un-Ironic Productions I see that it does :D "Everyone being too sensitive these days" is one of the arguments/complaints alt-right often uses when some problems (especially harassment and cultural appropriation and etc.) are addressed

[@un-ironicproductions6096]

@@danakanafina3615 ok I agree with the right on the cultural appropriation thing tho. People using other cultures is great. And tbh the right is justified nowadays, people say reasonable things and are called things like racist and sexist.

[@danakanafina3615]

Un-Ironic Productions I see your point. Personally I disagree with "... the right is justified nowadays" and I imagine our definitions of "reasonable" might be different, but I feel like I'm not informed enough yet on cultural appropriation in particular (I just used it as one of the examples) to converse too much on this, I'm not even American to begin with, and we aren't really facing this problem in my country. Have a nice day, I guess!

[@un-ironicproductions6096]

@@danakanafina3615 you have a swell day too!

[@BlackPhoenix13]

“ I agree what brennen is doing is wrong” “Yea” “But...” “WHAT”

[@Teag_Brohman15]

"it's hard to win an argument with a smart person, but its damn near impossible to win an argument with a stupid person". - the guy from Groundhog Day

[@HinagaMoizaf]

"I don't like your metaphors." Me with every E Lit class

[@someperson3807]

brennan is in extremely close par with trapp for me now his acting and writing is superb

[@someperson3807]

+some person 3:16

[@someperson3807]

+Sonny J "how strange" -Brennan 2018

[@yaboiskinnypen2040]

for real tho, the ceo episodes with brennan ar fucking hilarious

[@nosamnosam123]

How do you know what skits and lines he wrote?

[@TintinaLily]

when they appear at the end it means they wrote it, i think

[@rayflyers]

As a great turd once said, "very fine people on both sides."

[@davidc5867]

haha nice

[@chrishubbard64]

Dont forget the other pithy sayings of a great turd "If you like your health care plan, you can keep it."

[@MrAlexH1991]

But the thing is, there ARE great people on the “wrong” side. They just don’t all agree with you or your world views. This absolutist ‘us vs. them’ approach to everything is just serving to divide people even more. So the real question is this: how do we clearly define the proper balance between absolutism and over-willingness to compromise?

[@TheAwesome45]

Alex Harwell Yeah no. When that side chants “Jews will not replace us!” I’m skeptical of their moral fibre.

[@chrishubbard64]

@@TheAwesome45 Or when the other side chants "death to whitey" or "Fry em like bacon" im kinda skeptical of their moral fiber. See, I can play this game all day, you cant pretend the bad eggs represent the whole of the other side while ignoring the same bad eggs on your side.

[@CCoreOW]

"It's my right not to wear a mask", sounds just as stupid as "It's my right to hold this turd"

[@nafion112]

Indeed. Those arguments are quite similar, both figuratively and literally.

[@joshuabarrett2305]

Dan Anderson assuming that the argument had any logic base which it does not, it would only be figuratively, its not literally if it not physically the same thing, just shown you government puppets don’t have any brain power to think for yourselves

[@nafion112]

@@joshuabarrett2305 I said that the arguments are literally similar, not literally the same argument. That's a big difference that you didn't pick up on. If you are going to go around calling people puppets and criticizing their intelligence, first learn to comprehend English statements in their full context, and not simply the semantics of the words within them. You'll find that if you do that, intelligent people will take you much more seriously.

[@IveGotBeef]

It's my right to infect other people or myself with a dangerous virus! Other people's bodies and mine, my choice.

[@Zelink108]

app pro play app pro play Look out! We’ve got a turd holder over here!

[@zachryder3150]

"Like a turd...in the wind..."

[@ziyaadmoerat5644]

How it should have ended?

[@Danadryl]

That’s still not a phrase, Venom Still not... 😞

[@ourochroma]

This really makes me want to burn my bridges when I get to them

[@benparsons4979]

Why is that so funny for everyone? What Venom says is menacing and terrifying for the guy being held. Venom is going to turn him into a literal piece of shit and that terrifies the guy

[@desmondsolomon2809]

Those Sony writers, what'll they think of next...

[@WholesomeLad]

No, it's just a stress ball.

[@jambott5520]

Wholesome Lad *stress log

[@fishfoods2622]

omg grant's "I DONT LIKE THE METAPHOR"

[@onika2277]

Katatles the Fish omg 😂 😂

[@explolsivecake2045]

“It’s fine to yell at me for holding a turd but I somehow can’t hold a turd without getting yelled at?” Literally the same thing

[@generalalduin9548]

Explolsive Cake it’s phrased differently, therefore it’s different. Hey, I’ve seen dumber logic and sentences in arguments on the Internet.

[@tl1326]

It’s word magic fool It poisons your mind It makes you unnecessarily mad for no reason

[@dreaminginnoother]

This video should be called "Brennan DESTROYS coworkers with facts and logic and a turd."

[@un-ironicproductions6096]

I know what your trying to reference and it doesn't work.

[@dreaminginnoother]

Not only does it work, I'm like 95% sure those types of videos are where they got the whole premise of the sketch.

[@un-ironicproductions6096]

@@dreaminginnoother yeah but Ben Shapiro doesnt hold shitty opinions das the thing. The sketch is basically saying that he says dumb stuff and then calls you anti free speech whenever you oppose it. In reality ben Shapiro has people who outright try and censor him because they deem his opinions racist homophobic, transphobic, etc. even when it isnt. He says he doesnt believe or like soemthing and supports it with facts and leftists come and throw insults

[@dreaminginnoother]

...now you, sir, are holding the turd...

[@Blitzentine]

This whole interaction is everything!

[@aryshandono3249]

This sketch has aged quite well, considering the state we are in these days

[@hardyworld]

The "I don't like your metaphors!" at the end really got me rolling for some reason. I really miss College Humor, that whole crew really put out a lot of good content regularly and didn't show any sign of slowing down when the rug was suddenly pulled out from under them.

[@Kick0a0cat]

Get dropout, they still do stuff there

[@gwen9939]

get dropout, dimension 20 is worth it alone. The sketches are fine but them just hanging out doing game shows or whatever is 100x times better.

[@SunQueen-yp1dy]

“So much for the tolerant left” 😂 that’s a thinly veiled metaphor at best

[@thesillyluchadoreofdb3569]

It was at this moment people realised, brenan had surpassed trap in arguments

[@spodybanjack8800]

BRENNAN WHY ARE YOU SO GOOD AT WRITING SKETCHES??

[@farkbett699]

@ReasonX X unless you talk shit about New York

[@bambi1919]

@@farkbett699 Where do you think that turd came from? New York subway 😂

[@craigmhamm]

Can I get a shout out for the sound engineer for this skit? *::squish::*

[@pippilangsok6523]

Anthony Kozlowski was the sound mixer, it's in the description :)

[@muppetallica]

Right?! It sounded so moist.

[@luminatron]

haha moist turd go squish squish

[@shersockholmes6261]

@@luminatron you seem awfully aware👀

[@PsychedelicStick]

I love how this is just a hugely immature way to display the tolerance paradox. Brilliant!

[@ihavelesssubsthanapileofch736]

Mom said it's my turn to hold the turd!

[@fruitbatfox]

Raphael is the perfect representation of a centrist “Doesn’t it make us JUST as bad as him?” NO NO IT DOESN’T TF IS WRONG WITH YOU COMPROMISING ON THINGS THAT SHOULDNT BE COMPROMISED

[@Coolio1321]

This is the first attack I've seen on a centrist... huh.

[@passionmotifMusic]

It does make you just as bad. Just explain to him it's unsanitary and makes you uncomfortable. If he persists, contact HR immediately. THAT'S a centrist, you freak.

[@pairasox]

I don’t think that particular moment in the video was meant to criticize centrists. The man tried to draw a comparison between holding a fresh turd in your hand and yelling at someone. There was no compromising. And besides, centrism doesn’t involve compromising everything. Only things that should be compromised, or otherwise looked at from a more objective and/or nuanced perspective. The type of centrist you have described would be the centrist equivalent of a member of the alt-right or a far left “libtard” for lack of a better name (I think there is a difference between liberals and so-called libtards, as some liberals are willing to talk about their political beliefs), perpetually thinking that just because something is the middle-ground between two positions means that it MUST be the correct position. Being a centrist myself, I know that thinking in such a way can result in some ridiculous ideas. Like how yelling at someone is equivalent to holding shit in your hand.

[@wolfleaderpack5123]

That "it makes us just as bad as him" bullshit always pisses me off in movies and tv shows. I don't know what you're talking about with the whole centrist thing, but I just know that that saying get's me rather peeved when a villain whose killed tons of people is spared because the heroes would be "just as bad as him". NO THEY WOULDN'T BE DAMMIT!!!

[@kmdavidds]

@@wolfleaderpack5123 Two wrongs doesn't make a right. JK I agree with you😂

[@mjstory1976]

1:24 the squishing sound is just the most god awful thing ever

[@azure5273]

Brennan's ability to portray psychopaths is Oscar worthy 03:10 'rational, reasonable, calm' is giving me war flashbacks

[@nitin9013]

Mike's laptop still damaged from "when kink chooses you" skit..... Love the little details....

[@guy11568]

I thought it was from the best burger ever

[@coletm7146]

This actually has a big message

[@ninjaturtles4348]

Cole TM why hold one turd when you can hold two

[@MrConredsX]

It was about gun control Gun=Turd

[@kl3mta3]

Lol you’re an idiot. It’s the complete opposite of what they were saying. They were saying you don’t have the right to do something absolutely stupid and argue it’s your right. You just completely missed the point. You’re the problem not the victim.

[@memoowo]

I think almost all CH videos do

[@morbidblade]

The point is if you don't have rational thinking skills then you take what you know for granted. If you can't think for yourself, then you can't even argue against why holding a turd in your hand is wrong and resort to violence.

[@harryhartstone2254]

This is honestly some of collegehumour's best work

[@duffin3503]

It’s a ripped sketch idea. Whitest Kids U Know did something very similar back in the mid 2000s. (Guy holding turd in a meeting, everyone is grossed out)

[@NateLevin]

@@duffin3503 Yeah the idea is definitely stolen. They do expand on it a bit though, both sketches are good on their own.

[@Dacronhai]

the simple common denomimator "poop in a meeting" is not something that can be "ripped off", and the basis of the jokes of both sketches is completely different; seems a bit wild to call that "stolen and just a bit expanded on"

[@retropulpmonkey]

I like to equate someone having a really terrible take on a social issue as the physical embodiment of someone eating a turd sandwich right in front of you while having no idea they are currently snacking down on turds. In my mind's eye, I've now seen Elon Musk eat like 40 of them.

[@luckenya1801]

This is THE DEFINITION of 2018 ;)

[@AxxLAfriku]

Don't let this distract you from the fact that I am the ugliest human worldwide. That is the reason why I wear a mask in all of my videos. I also smell like 100 dead orang utans. Greetings from Ottawa

[@yaya-mk3nn]

AxxL are u ok

[@kn1ght-788]

@AxxL bad day?

[@shlepe3623]

@@AxxLAfriku That's pretty edgy.

[@MrxstGrssmnstMttckstPhlNelThot]

@@AxxLAfriku are you Ok dude? If you mean the Canadian Ottawa. I'm with ya man. It's not great but it's not that bad either.

[@tibiademon9157]

"Oh yeah just keep telling me not to hold this turd! You know what, now I'm gonna hold TWO turds, just because it makes you so angry!"

[@immortalhamster1645]

“I wanna challenge you guys to voice your feelings about when I smear poop on you”. This is without a doubt the best college humor sketch ever made.

[@Captaindragonfire]

Republicans trying to argue that fascism is a legitimate political standpoint

[@SirPhysics]

So you won't tolerate their fascism? That makes you the real fascist!

[@jansojele289]

@@SirPhysics so fuken deep

[@gleetenders1549]

3:06 I love how Grant just freaks out.

[@davideparis8039]

Is this really just an analogy to neo fascism in the modern political discourse? I love it

[@shadypalmtree2989]

@@bakedbeanteen8791 It could be about anything. The turd is just a placeholder for anything that a person wants to argue over that is inherently stupid to those around them, but their main argument is that it's their right to do "this" and that no one around them should be offended over it. Which is why he turned their words around as if trying to insult them and pushing it (literally) in their face so that they couldn't ignore it even if they wanted to.

[@shmuels1383]

@l r but I have been noticing it a lot more on the right, can you elaborate please?

[@ace97101]

@@shadypalmtree2989 right but it's clearly Brennan that's in the wrong here, which is the whole point of the video, and if you missed that then you severely missed the point. The point was that there ideas and actions that are not worth considering in the modern discourse, and that Brennan's style of argumentation in this video is quite literally poisonous

[@shadypalmtree2989]

@@ace97101 Obviously he was wrong. Please reread my comment, because I dont think you understood it

[@cmbrick9320]

@Khaine's Lair Trying to get people deplatformed, trying to take people's funding away, violently assaulting people you don't agree with. All tactics of the left today in an effort to quell dissenting opinions they call "facist", this is facist by definition.

[@sebastianmaregatti]

Yep Brennan is officially my favorite new cast member

[@erikgross16]

He’s by far my least

[@CaelumDes]

Welp, doesn't matter now cause they just killed him off

[@TheOreniko]

Sebastian Maregatti I’ve been thinking that too since when I saw his first skits :)

[@ismayonnaiseaninstrument8700]

I hate just how well this aged.

[@michaele.6785]

*once* *again* *I* *am* *being* *attacked* *for* *presenting* *new* *ideas*

[@MrHubbabble]

Ben Shapiro's favourite video

[@thakatspajamaz]

The sad thing is, the people who need this message the most will not get that it's satirizing them - "all opinions are equally valid! Where's the tolerant left?! You're invalidating my free speech by using your free speech to yell at me! OPTICS!"

[@k1ngk4gl3]

@Khaine's Lair Also a fan of butthole spiders.

[@commondognut]

MrHubbabble lol except for the fact that nobody on either side is arguing for anything even remotely equivalent to holding a shit

[@allisondoak9425]

“Brennan was a bear of a man holding is bare turd in his bare hands”

[@commondognut]

Khaine's Lair where tho? Can you give me an example?

[@visibleconfusion9894]

Why this not a TV show yet?

[@haustyl12]

Can we get 5000 subscribers with no videos? It was but got cancelled so quick

[@biggreenblob]

Because it sucks

[@fran13r]

TV is were youtube shows go to die

[@EnderBoyGamingPotato]

wtf i just saw u on another video that was posted like 8 years ago and your comment was a month ago and now i see you here get out of my head

[@chattick]

Because it takes them a couple days to make 5 minutes of content that is still hit or miss :/

[@theepicwaffle5212]

Nobody: Ben Shapiro during debates:

[@LisaBeergutHolst]

It's uncanny lol

[@DimT670]

Its almost like this is satire huh?

[@LisaBeergutHolst]

@@DimT670 It's almost like the comment you're replying to is satire lol

[@spodybanjack8800]

Whoever decided to cut to Katie's mute disappointment at 3:40 deserves a medal

[@levarmy4339]

Moral of the story: if you’re gonna bring out actual shit among your friends and coworkers, and rub it in their faces, don’t expect anyone to be okay with it

[@Dolmens_Art]

Pretty sure the intended moral of the story is that leftists should use violence to fight fascism.

[@astk5214]

The turd is homosexuality

[@linkdude55]

Never have I ever thought a sketch about holding a turd could be so politically charged (and correct)

[@ssc172]

This is such an insanely good metaphor for the altright

[@strawberrypencl]

It's an insanely good metaphor for anyone with an awful opinion, left or right - might want to check your hand btw

[@avalosp]

@@strawberrypencl Literally though. Both sides have a corrupted idea on whats good and what isn't

[@tommagennis]

@@strawberrypencl It’s very obviously targeted at the Alt Right

[@strawberrypencl]

@@tommagennis Nah it's targeted at people who hold 'shitty' and stupid opinions and beliefs, there is a line when he mentions 'the left', but really it can be anyone from either side. If you think Brennan is being alt-right in this sketch, you have a real skewed view on politics my guy

[@AnimePlaysMinecraft]

These replies are hilarious because it was literally the point of the sketch. "Both sides have bad takes" when one is literally holding a piece of shit. Also, Brennan said "so much for the tolerant left", not sure how people missed this but whilst it can go for anyone with a bad take or opinion it was targeted at the right.

[@yureiotakughost9464]

When the turd was smeared on Trap, it was the most accurate reaction ever

[@ZapDash]

Except for the part where he didn't go to a sink and wash his hands or face.

[@katherinehearnet7533]

They didn't tell him it was fake

[@etcetc1]

This is a direct attack on people who think satire like this is "about both sides". One side is very clearly holding a turd. We are not all holding turds. JUST THROW IT AWAY.

[@etcetc1]

This is not about both sides!!! This is about conservatives who think that "metaphorically, we're all holding turds". UH, NO WE'RE NOT, AND THIS TURD IS STINKING UP THE WHOLE PLACE.

[@TheFlumpySquid]

some conservatives and some liberals are holding turds *cough cough* 72 genders

[@FD_and_B]

TheFLumpySquid yeah, trans folks ARE just as bad as murderous charlottesville nazis. Great praxis, captain centrist! once again *you're* smarter than everyone! watch the fucking video again, cause you didn't get it lmao

[@TheFlumpySquid]

Well actually (favorite game show of the college humor channel) yes, what happened in Charlottesville was awful. Let me remind you, however, that is was not alt-right members who started anything there. They had gone through all the forms and documents to establish a proper peaceful demonstration. It was Antifa and people who agreed with them that ran in there and started throwing things and attacking the demonstrators with weapons. It eventually hit its zenith when an alt right member ran over a passerby, and even that was an accident due to the demonstrator being chased and harassed by the assaulters. So yeah I still think Nazis and white supremacists are stupid and they are just being edgy, but I also believe in more than one side of the story.

[@TheFlumpySquid]

I also apreciate the compliment btw:)

[@OGAMIS]

This is beyond perfect, but the last line should have been "Now I'm holding two turds... *and it's your fault for criticising me!*"

[@Hale-gk9zu]

When Brennan smears it on Trapp and everyone's screaming, Rehka's straight up laughing over there 🤣🤣and then goes back to outrage once she speaks again. I love that they kept that in 🤣🤣

[@Mikesean45]

The number of commentors thinking this is condemning "both sides" is incredibly depressing.

[@shmuels1383]

I feel you

[@koldunasvalkirija3094]

Why?

[@blank_3768]

But it is? He uses shitty arguments used by both sides ei you’re all nazis and so much for the tolerant left.

[@Mikesean45]

I only seem to see the left using Nazi when they are talking about *literal* neo-Nazis.

[@Mikesean45]

@Ike U well, what were they arguing? you sure it wasn't just Poe's law in effect?

[@Viktor5644]

This is every conservative on the internet

[@livemammothreaction]

And centrist

[@gideonkloosterman]

@@livemammothreaction What do you think a centrist is 🤔

[@chrisbeer5685]

@@gideonkloosterman Raph in the sketch is a centrist.

[@professionalyeeter]

I disagree *reports comment for promoting terrorism*

[@yakone1163]

In death, he became a martyr, inspiring millions of turd holders to rise up to their oppressors thus beginning the revolution.

[@thenintendoman]

You can always tell when Brennan has written the sketch

[@octoberboiy]

Ok I take back my criticism of the commenters saying Brennan saved this channel... BRENNAN SAVED THIS CHANNEL! I haven’t laughed so hard in years 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[@commentcopbadge6665]

"I have laughed so hard in years"...??????? Huh? Wha......?

[@octoberboiy]

CommentCop Badge#666 typo dude

[@albertoabrego6497]

I think ur a bit exaggerated

[@samsaraslight8377]

But this was like one of his weakest skits, I think the Tide pod skit was the real shit that got people on the Bren train.

[@TiagoMorbusSa]

Alberto Abrego To exaggreate is a transitive verb. Get your grammar fixed!

[@Saxinful]

The title made me think he was holding it in, not literally holding it... I'm upset

[@sph3re]

You can tell Brennan is really proud of this sketch because of the little smile you see on his face between 2:59 to 3:00

[@Tuffsmoygles]

Replace turd with anti-maskers and boom, you got 2020.

[@fellsbane1126]

I'm not sure if I should be amused or horrified the comments section is proving this video's point so perfectly...

[@110000116699]

Fellsbane what that you can strawman the right when it's written by the left yeah great point didn't prove anything

[@connor-bj6ku]

They're proving the point of Raph's character in this sketch perfectly

[@lincolnlundgren7597]

Dude because it's a stupid point...I could make points all day that the video would prove

[@majikss]

@@lincolnlundgren7597 but you dont

[@PennyDreadful1]

@@110000116699 It's not really a strawman though. It's universally acknowledged that the American right is holding us down. It the Charybdis to the left's Scylla.

[@Killatunga]

You guys are like the satire version of BuzzFeed; perfect 👏

[@meatwadsprlte]

CollegeHumor was a thing way before BuzzFeed. They've been around for almost two decades. I've been following them for almost a decade, Buzzfeed has been around as long as ive been following CollegeHumor but didn't start to get popular until a few years ago. EDIT: My point being, BuzzFeed IS LIKE the non-satire version of CollegeHumor. lel. non-satire? un-satire? idk

[@un-ironicproductions6096]

Buzzfeed is shit tho

[@furthestlobster4680]

Killatunga SEEMS NORMAL TO ME

[@un-ironicproductions6096]

@@commentcopbadge6665 hah ll

[@paulmag91]

Satiren't

[@Wouter2312]

I feel like this is a metaphor for something. not sure what...

[@2007dalin]

gays

[@shavingryansprivates4332]

The (far)right has got some crazy ideas (race ''realism" and other bullshit) that most people wont even consider. And they are calling the left out for not being open minded to those ridiculous ideas. The video makes clear it is okay to have zero tolerance for some things and portrays the guy with the shit idea as the bad person

[@blank_3768]

Is a symbol for political extremism

[@Agile73]

@@shavingryansprivates4332 probably pointed at both sides. Antifa is just as bad as the alt right, yet they get showered with love by the left wing media

[@shavingryansprivates4332]

@@Agile73 i don't live in the us so i am not familiar with why antifa is considered bad. Could you maybe explain? Isn't being against facism a good thing?

[@satevo462]

"What's he doing? What's he doing with his words"? lol....