Nasty Cooking

[@akisutahatter3245]

nothing more relatable than jarvis's "YES i know this is ragebait NO i dont care" energy lets all be mad at this nonsense together

[@manashieldmedia]

or idk be mad at real life things that deserve it like your criminally low minimum wage or the fact that a bunch of rich connected pedos are running free

[@lrizzard]

Yes! because I know it's ragebait.. why is she putting this out into the world? knowing that it's horrible? dedicating this much of her time and fridge to anger people!? WHY!?

[@MrGoldfish8]

​@@lrizzardMoney and attention 😔

[@SixtySpace]

but it's all made up

[@MeeYeeWeeWee]

​@@lrizzard rage bait is the cheat code to getting tons of engagement and possibly getting some money out of it.

[@HaroldMagnera]

Her cooking is the reason her husband has the 15 hour shift

[@JennyferPepin]

Man tried to sleep at work but he wasn't allowed.

[@KARMAZYNA]

And after eating that, a 15 hour sh*t.

[@Nezumi99]

Bet his work in 8hours but he just stay there the extra 7 hours and the boss is like "dude just go homw" "I can't my wife is cooking me dinner"😭😭💀

[@marisareanne]

@@KARMAZYNAba dum tsss 🥁

[@marvandthe4topz]

Needs to pay for healthcare.

[@Temaile]

"Maybe you're doing your art, looking away" I hear while bent over my embroidery work like a desk shrimp.

[@flynnjminesq]

Same, I'm doing cross stitch lmao 😭

[@charlesham9214]

@@flynnjminesq Knitting, lmao

[@cupnoodleart3370]

HE KNOWS HE KNOWS!!!

[@sadpatheticbardboy]

im drawing dudes kissin

[@catastrophia2160]

DESK SHRIMP HELP I LOVE IT

[@intern_dana]

irrelevant fact: the morton salt girl logo and the tagline "when it rains, it pours" was made to demonstrate that morton's salt doesn't clump together in humid weather, which was common with table salt before mortons started adding MgCO3 to theirs in the 1910s

[@spektralkitty624]

That's so interesting!

[@lrizzard]

that's awesome!

[@sydney-zx2hi]

this is such a fun fact i could kiss u on the lips

[@thatfuzzypotato1877]

Oh, now I also know why my family added dry white rice to our salt shakers growing uo!

[@g_willow]

And this is my thing that I learned today. Cool.

[@scrappydudes1783]

That amount of salt is attempted murder

[@amirsufyani6319]

It's only "attempted" until it works

[@milescox1792]

He makes that joke in the video.

[@Goomations]

@@milescox1792REALLY?! HE DID?! HE DID?! 😱

[@milescox1792]

@@Goomations It's "calm-down" time 🤗

[@chrissie627]

As-salt one might say

[@PinkApocalypse]

I see EXACTLY what she’s doing. All that salt and carbs and MOULD? Yas Queen, get that inheritance, girl!!!

[@dancinganimals.]

Is mould the British spelling of mold?

[@doggwater]

@@dancinganimals.yes that’s how we spell it in Australia too

[@botanicalitus4194]

but he's supposedly blue collar, what is she gonna inherit? his overalls? 😭

[@handl3869]

😅​@@botanicalitus4194

[@YesIlikebananasSo]

@@botanicalitus4194maybe he has life insurance

[@asumi7522]

That garlic was so f’d up Jarvis thought it was an onion 😭😭

[@kaibaiarrio1299]

THATS GARLIC????

[@DNNSBRKR]

@@kaibaiarrio1299 as a chef, i cant tell if its an onion or garlic

[@angelicart.6]

it def looks like some radioactive garlic

[@tsingletary6311]

The beans were so old and dry, he thought they were a cookie

[@nameless6512]

@@DNNSBRKR you know it's THAT bad when you can't tell what it is 😭😭😭

[@AntheanCeilliers]

This is genuinely hilarious ragebait. The way she makes it a point to say she has no kids and is a stay at home wife, the vascilating danger of the jobs she gave her fake husband, the deadpan cheese slap -- this is art, baby.

[@biggestastiest]

this isn't even ragebait atp it's just really good shitposting

[@n-the-ninth]

i had to pause the video because i was laughing so hard at the cheese slap it's so fucking funny

[@MsSphinx91]

This is the only type of content creation I would be interested in doing 😈

[@Kuchhh]

@@MsSphinx91Go make that bag grifting on morons! Why not? Humanity is doomed anyway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[@The-Sycophant-Fox]

She should've just blended everything into a good, mix it all up then deep fry it. We'll do it all in a hospital gown to really stick to the bit, we'll pretend the people we're feeding are having swallowing problems. (This will be posted to a fetish site.)

[@Darri3n]

People think it's fake because the husband's job changed when in reality each video is a new husband with a similar work schedule that's about to have the heartiest of attacks.

[@IronWangCreates]

Dead husband inheritance speed run

[@catnippackets]

you are genuinely so real for the "sometimes I have to get mad at something stupid" thing bc I feel the exact same way, it's almost calming in a way to pretend like this is your biggest issue for a second

[@writeonshell]

I remember seeing a study about that and it's very common for people to do that - it's why the toilet paper over/under debate eternally rages so hard

[@marymay4723]

I dont understand this... to me, its like im already so upset, depressed, and mad about so many things in life that actually matters so WHY ADD MORE TO IT JUST BECAUSE ??? Its adding fuel to the fire. This rage bait stuff doesnt help me pretend its the only thing to be mad about, i dont see any "pros" to this content - it just makes everything worse knowing theyre doing this on purpose, wasting food for views, trying to get people upset when we're all already so upset.

[@Snowfoxie1]

And that teeny tiny little superiority, like “I’m not perfect but THANK GOODNESS I’m smarter than them!” Everyone needs an occasional ego boost.

[@wynterb9609]

@@marymay4723that’s you personally. I get why other people may be relieved a bit by getting mad at that. Sometimes having a small issue for once is a break from the ground breaking weight of everything else.

[@VisonsofFalseTruths]

@@marymay4723 for some people it’s a form of venting. It momentarily takes their mind off the serious issues in their life by distracting them with whatever banal bullshit. But I’m the same as you; it doesn’t make me less upset about the other stuff, it’s just one more thing on the pile.

[@vintage-radio]

"Certified plumber boy, cerified heart attack" Ain't no way drake is catching strays on Jarvis Johnson's channel

[@No-jj3gn]

I literally sobbed when he said that 😂😂😂😂😂

[@IcyBlockyCube]

16:27

[@angelicart.6]

@@IcyBlockyCube your name is so funny for no reason 😭

[@gotmilkbutt]

Lmao Drake earned it, he ain't catching strays.

[@jeremy.j]

Nahhhh, Drake been catching strays from every other content creator nowadays 😂

[@Snowfoxie1]

I LOVE this take on rage bait. Sometimes it does feel so cathartic to get mad over something absolutely stupid and pointless!

[@QuikVidGuy]

Symbiotic rage content

[@Shsy7573]

Idk what it is about food rage bait in particular, but it doesn’t even make me mad anymore. I just start laughing my ass off.

[@AnimeMintTea]

Its because she wastes food for these.

[@Snowfoxie1]

@@AnimeMintTea no more so than every grocery store and restaurant in America. How much of the food in your fridge will actually get eaten and how much will go ignored until it goes bad?

[@lalaspeaks]

new jarvis video? oh we are EATING toda- oh no... we are not eating

[@voguishthrone5887]

I’m still gunna eat bc I’m hungry

[@Just_A_Random_Person0_0]

​​@@voguishthrone5887 same I'm eating rn

[@nameless6512]

I jist ate a dark chocolate Ferrero Rocher bar

[@braininmeatsuit1207]

Literally the ONE time I turn on a Jarvis video when I'm eating, this is blasphemy

[@zniffl]

I kind want to see a very sexy woman flaunting their body while cooking the most vile shi It wouldn’t be her looks that make the video good, but the fact she’s purposefully making a vile concoction just to see what she’ll add next

[@soupylips]

Cooking my blue collar meal a 15 hour shift after his husband

[@Anna-19928]

Cooking my husband. For 15 hours. Blue collar meal :)

[@hollownix]

Happy pride month to the meal and his husband🏳️‍🌈

[@mariakanwal7907]

all of these comments made me snort laugh. pure poetry.

[@jessica-li7wj]

@@Anna-19928cooking my shift!! for my 15 hour husband :)

[@bruzzunathtuch]

Reading this is terrible for my dyslexia. Bravo 💙

[@dpeterson5630]

The SET DRESSING of the stove. She could do horror movies

[@Laura-bw8zx]

A "curled up slice of pizza of dubious age" sounds like a Neopets item

[@Doub1eSpark]

It could definitely be a gourmet food item in the gross food category, and I wouldn't question it lol

[@fuhrercrepe]

I misread this as "curled up slice of pizza of dubious rage"

[@salmik_]

Absolutely it does lol

[@LochlanV]

My name is gadigago

[@kism_t]

it also sounds like a lauren bousfield song name lmao

[@arutezza]

tbh i had a step mom that genuinely cooked this bad, sometimes the food was just straight up raw some bad cooks are just completely clueless and think they *can* cook

[@tsingletary6311]

There was a whole show dedicated to them for many seasons

[@Dark_Red_Echo]

This had me thinking about my sister who literally burned water she was boiling one time

[@drill4206]

😂😂it was my mother in law 😂😂😂baddddd

[@BlckSWANWhtRbbt]

I have seen earnest videos with a similar energy to this. I definitely think she is mocking them!

[@robinnicole4466]

Fair, but this is rage bait for views

[@scalylayde8751]

with the mouldy cheese, the way that pizza looks, and the bite taken out of the tortilla, I'm getting the impression that she uses expired food to make these videos at least some of the time. I definitely respect that a lot more than wasting perfectly edible food.

[@hannahgenovese886]

Food waste needs to be added to terms and conditions, I seriously wanna see these people banned.

[@urgodmoon]

hard agree, the ragebait works bc i genuinely get angry at food waste.

[@Scott-on2er]

food is too expensive to be playing like this 😰

[@RedRave604]

Acting like the food industry doesn't exist... Yall need to have better priorities ong

[@ananyanirantar5825]

But it seems like expired food that no one would eat. Especially the tortilla and pizza

[@CorinaSha]

@@ananyanirantar5825yeah and when was McDonalds considered food 💀

[@denjiwawa]

JARVISSS HELP THE WAY IM LITERALLY DRAWING AND HE WAS LIKE "so for the ppl who arent looking at the screen cuz ur doing art"

[@pinacoolatta]

same lmao!!! hes the best background noise

[@nicolettemw]

Me TOOO

[@Nineteensixtytwo]

I’m making myself lunch rn lmao rare occasion where I wasn’t drawing while watching the video

[@Inkiel420]

THE WAY MY HEAD TURNED TO THE SCREEN MY JAW DROPPED CUZ IM WORKING ON ARTFIGHT

[@BlandSpaghetti14]

fr I was in another tab looking for a reference photo

[@CountryBwoy]

All them dudes wanting Trad Wives until the skillet come out

[@sarah.1230]

“if you refry beans three times, it summons beetlejuice” 😂

[@harriettrott5970]

beantlejuice

[@sarah.1230]

@@harriettrott5970 omfg👏🏻

[@sagegreeeeeeen]

@@harriettrott5970beantledrpepper (had to make it personalized to Patricia)

[@FranuxuMusic12]

jarvis saying "if youre not lookig at the video right now, maybe youre just like doing your art, looking away" while i was listening to the video and doing my art was so surreal lol

[@ashdweeb9063]

IT HAD MY HEAD SNAPPING OVER, HE GOT ME

[@elleoo7]

SAME!

[@kerrymingsun2498]

Me too! Very meta 10/10

[@wisteriamelodia]

I wasn’t doing art but I happened to look away in just those specific couple seconds 😭

[@StevoDesign]

Is this the first time you've ever felt seen?

[@garchompenthusiast]

Genuine cooking advice, if you add too much salt you can knock back the taste by adding sweet or acidic things, like sugar or a vinegar or wine that'll match whatever you're making! You can also dilute what you're cooking and make more of it to, y'know, consume less salt. If you wanna avoid using too much try and get like a second hand salt shaker, like one you grind flakes in. You get more portion control that way

[@sangystre]

the worst sin of all is letting the dr. pepper sit out without a lid and slowly go flat

[@travislefebvre7341]

Quickly*. Dr.pepper and rootbeer both go flat in minutes

[@valedixion]

the real sin is buying dr. pepper and actually drinking it

[@ornitharts]

I had a voice teacher tell me to drink hot Dr Pepper with lemon when sick with a sore throat. An actual crime against humanity.

[@Kuchhh]

Wrong, the worst sin is drinking soda in the first place ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[@Kuchhh]

@@ornithartsthat actually works though lol

[@Arch_ann]

The concoction in that pan reminds me when middle schoolers go to buffets and mix a little of everything into five pounds of ketchup

[@willamtaft5899]

Nah that’s just you bud

[@82licious]

Frye pfp ‼️

[@chobies5383]

Once in 5th grade I made a concoction of ketchup, BBQ sauce, ranch, and hand sanitizer. It was the most foul, devious, odor ever.

[@vintagedoctor7128]

nah cuz thats how my dad eats his food. literally

[@Arch_ann]

@@82licious frye pfp‼️‼️🦅

[@katelynnibarra2831]

this feels like when you're bored after you finish your food as a kid and just start making some horrible abomination with the leftovers while you wait for everyone else to finish

[@the-postal-dude]

"everyone wins and everyone sins" goes hard as fuck

[@ona512]

hi youtube channel the postal dude

[@BlackDogsAndLadybugs]

Sick name for an album.

[@MT_Gamer.]

Remind me of this comment

[@r3d040]

I've been seeing so many videos about the nastiest cooking and I think this is the universe telling me to learn how to cook before I end up like them 💀💀

[@northstarjakobs]

Tips from someone who loves to cook but knows that getting started can sometimes be pretty intimidating: - Always, always, taste as you go, especially if you've added any seasoning. If you're cooking for just yourself, you can have one fork or spoon by your side to taste. If you're cooking for you and others, either get a new utensil each time you taste or wash it between tastings. Measurements can get you in the ballpark of what you want, but only by tasting can you be sure that the food is right for your particular palate. - You can counterbalance something being too sweet, too sour, too bitter, or too spicy, but it's next to impossible to counterbalance something being too salty. Be conservative with salt and keep in mind whether your ingredients already have lots of salt in them, such as cured meats. - Measuring out seasonings can be a good way to start, but I always season from the heart. Every kitchen should be stocked with (in my humble opinion), salt, pepper, chili powder, hot sauce, ketchup, soy sauce, garlic (cloves and powder), rosemary, basil, Italian seasoning, cumin, and red pepper flakes. In terms of pre-prepared seasoning blends, I like Lowry's Seasoning Salt, Old Bay, and Slap Ya Mama Cajun seasoning. You can modify this list based on your preferred spice level and the flavors that you want to have in your food. Dried herbs are more potent than fresh ones, so always keep that in mind when you season. - Salt your pasta water, and taste it. Your pasta water should taste salty otherwise your pasta won't have any flavor. You don't need to salt the water for instant ramen though, that shit is plenty salty as is. - Taste your pasta to check if its done. Pull it slightly early if you're adding any sauce into the hot pan with your pasta (including the cheese sauce for box mac and cheese). - One of the simplest dishes to try making when you're first starting cooking is spicing up stovetop instant ramen. Crack a couple eggs into the water when it comes to a boil before you add your noodles, add some frozen peas or other easy-to-cook veggies you might have, add some cheese if that suits your fancy, boom, tasty meal that tastes like more than something you buy at the grocery store for 50¢. - Learn how to use a knife safely. This is hard to convey over a KZbin comment but you can find videos on KZbin that demonstrate good knife skills. - There are a lot of good KZbin videos out there that are great for beginners. I'd recommend Adam Ragusea, Basics with Babish (things can get a little bit fancy in terms of ingredients and dishes but the techniques on display are solid), Brian David Gilbert's Midnight Gourmand video, emmymade (she especially makes great videos about cooking on the cheap), and others that I'm sure other commenters will suggest. There's a lot of ragebait and clickbait cooking on KZbin as well as videos of more expert chefs who use techniques that are beyond the skill of the beginner, but there are also many people who seek to educate about cooking. I also love the Salt Fat Acid Heat documentary on Netflix, as beyond being absolutely mouthwatering to watch, it explores the most important pillars of cooking in a way that demonstrates why they are important to cooking a good dish. - I don't know how old you are, but I'll assume you're on the younger side; talk to the adults and older peers in your life and ask them to teach you! Cooking is more fun with a friend and the best way to learn in the kitchen is through hands-on experience, and that experience can be a lot less stressful if someone is there by your side guiding you. If you have any other questions after reading this long-ass comment, please ask! I love teaching people how to cook.

[@asamlos]

I want to add to this: -Salt is always necessary. While you definitely need to be careful with how much salt you add (because the only way to counterbalance salt is to literally add more of all the other ingredients so that it's less salt per other stuff) you will also pretty much always add it. Even in sweet foods, you will add salt. Salt doesn't just make things taste salty - it actually magnifies other flavors and can cut bitterness (basically salt can block bitterness receptors on the tongue). -If you have access to older TV, Good Eats is always a fascinating series as it not only gives cooking tips but explains why cooking and baking do what they do! It can be useful to understand some of the reasons behind why food Does The Thing. -You Suck At Cooking (yes that is the channel name) also has some good recipes! -If you want to try baking, keep in mind that it is a similar discipline to cooking but not exactly the same. Baking is an exact science; cooking is not. As the previous commenter mentioned, you can truly season with your heart in cooking! You cannot do that with baking. This actually can make it easier in some ways - if you follow baking directions exactly there is a good chance it will turn out perfectly. However, the blade is double-edged: mess around too much with ratios, methods, and/or ingredients and it could outright fail. I don't want you to be afraid to try baking, though, but still keep its rigidity in mind. -Do not deep fry until you are very, very confident in your cooking. Be careful when pan frying, too. If an oil fire starts, DO NOT USE WATER! Water will cause it to spread. Cover the fire with something and smother it. -I hope you enjoy learning how to cook! Food is something almost every person has in common and can be a great way to do things like connect with family and friends! It's also a nice way to experience other cultures as well as more closely understand your own. Have fun! 😊

[@wanderingchook1193]

let me encourage you by saying; you dont need to learn how to cook to not cook like this.

[@northstarjakobs]

@@asamlos Thank you for adding on! Salt should absolutely be a part of every dish; in Salt Fat Acid Heat, the author/host Samin Nosrat expresses that sentiment perfectly by saying that salt "makes food taste more like itself". You obviously want to add more salt when you want a dish to be salty, but if you add just a pinch of salt to every dish it amplifies the flavors that are already there, especially with sweet things.

[@Pocket_Sized_Satan]

No its just engagement farmers they all do it to make people angry and engage in their tiktok

[@Passive_noot]

1:19 the fact I got called out in a instant since lately I'll put these videos on and mess on my phone like it's a audio book XD

[@madison.f_rules]

0:57 “a lot of y’all like to watch my videos while you are eating” as I was taking a bite of my lunch.

[@rat3015]

While i was taking a bite of my croissant 😔

[@egret512]

While I'm snacking on my popcorn

[@tsingletary6311]

As I sat down with my pizza 😭

[@serenas5784]

Legit sat down with a croissant and was like oh…… I’ll wait till after I eat it then

[@rcbinhood]

SAME

[@Asumsauce1796]

I like to imagine she does this without her husband knowing, she waits for her husband to get home and set down his mcdonalds and then she grabs it the moment he looks away and scurries off to the kitchen

[@ona512]

my seagull wife who was cursed to become human cooks me dinner

[@kanuliaoti]

😭That would be so insane

[@SpeedsterL6]

⁠@@ona512in another world?

[@ona512]

@@SpeedsterL6 in this world very specifically

[@doggwater]

I’m crying 😂

[@itsyagirlvicku]

7:48 - splatmaxxing

[@YuriPlisetskyKinnie]

That salt pour was the craziest thing I’ve ever seen, violently disgusting Edit: maybe she hates her husband, and that’s why the food is so awful and she always looks so angry and unenthused

[@scrappydudes1783]

Fr, legit made me nauseous 🤢 used as much salt as id put in a giant pot of soup in that tiny already super salty meal, how is that even edible 😭

[@nothankyou191]

she’s a troll

[@silverluna8218]

i eat salt as a snack to the point where normally salted things are barely salted for me- but that was too much salt even for me.. 😭

[@splatsunemiku]

shes not even married

[@FlorSilvestre12]

She 100% does not actually have a husband

[@Badtimeblur]

When you get your cooking experience from mobile games:

[@lrizzard]

mobile game ads specifically

[@Kuchhh]

@@lrizzardNah, these are the kind of people that see the ad and go “That looks fun, I wanna try!” and actually download it 😂

[@InkyTheBlue]

Bootleg Cooking Mama Games:

[@Acquaintance6336]

I'm only at the 2 minute mark and already love that Jarvis is verbally describing what's going on. I'm doing dishes and can't see the screen half the time

[@blakberrii1373]

So much salt it could treat POTS for a full year

[@reallygoodatfolding]

Lol I have POTS and even I was like, ‘that’s a bit much’ 😅

[@CelestialBunnyPaws]

As a person with POTS; nah, I'm good. 😂

[@abbijayne]

​@reallygoodatfolding I'm ashamed I considered it for a hot minute🤣 but quickly realised it would probably kill me lmao

[@lillypotter2662]

No genuinely, even with my POTS I’m cringing

[@KBats]

All this time we thought rig workers had shorter lifespans because of the abnormal sleep schedules and rough working conditions. In truth, all the rig wives work for Big Salt and are running a Secret Salt Cabal to take down the oil industry, one husband at a time. Jarvis needs a recut of this video in conspiracy theory format style. 😂

[@bruzzunathtuch]

*hushed voice* Where can I join this cabal?

[@libbyloumelon]

Big salt 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[@zevbites]

The bacon (?) she slapped into the pan looks like the strips of air dried chicken skin i feed my dog as a treat, the thought of serving that to my husband after he comes home from an exhausting day at work is devious lol

[@IDK-oo2uh]

Looks like my dogs' Begging Strips with bacon and cheese flavoring.

[@mykalaraine9112]

"I'm imagining the person making this with a complete straight face" to "she doesn't seemed enthused" Jarvis she was making the expression you imagined 😂

[@fumi_ferret6212]

*slowly puts down the saltine i was eating*

[@Tr4ns1st0r]

You heard him. Nasty cooking.

[@guyanomaly]

Fry it. Fry the saltine

[@rex_ink]

That saltine is probably considered low-sodium compared to ANY of those salt pours

[@pt6328]

nah keep eating it, it'll help with the nausea from the food in this video

[@fumi_ferret6212]

@@pt6328 Not even a saltine could save me from those horrors

[@harveydangerfield]

such a random detail but i can't describe the rush of joy i felt when "doing your art" was listed as one of the reasons someone might not be looking at the screen. i've heard many a youtuber list activities that they assume someone might be doing while they play their videos in the background, and never once have i ever heard working on art listed. that is what i happen to be doing right now so it just made me really happy lmao

[@brittanyblank5901]

"i mean maybe we can get a grease fire going guys" KILLED ME LMFAOO

[@bestintheband5114]

I really hope this is a deep ARG where if you take the first letters of the sodas in the background it spells out the lore or something and eventually we learn the terrifying story of Chef Derrique being condemned to this for his sins

[@evannbailey8319]

Patricia is measuring the salt with her heart, and the salt is not enough to cause a heart attack

[@hell0mega]

15:16 i will not forget, jarvis, that when you were doing this live you called it "raw lettuce" and we all called you out for it

[@No-jj3gn]

Gotta make sure you heat up your lettuce

[@DiMagnolia]

Perhaps a little medium rare lettuce

[@doomsdayrabbit4398]

Burger King foot lettuce.

[@harlomints7727]

HAHA you can hear the cut

[@Espion-]

14:08 when this was being livestreamed a few days ago, someone in chat said "thats the husband" and im still laughing

[@purplepup7438]

17:54 why is no one talking abt the fact that she said she puts her eggs in the cabinets not the fridge

[@Isabella.Ros33]

That's normal with unpasteurized eggs I believe, just not store bought eggs in the US

[@isitleeyourelookingfor6352]

Obsessed with the energy of this video. He's simply along for the ride, too perplexed to try and stop her

[@punchyl7574]

Shout out to all of you who watch Jarvis’ videos while doing other things and not looking because now my blind ass gets audio description for the videos on screen. Group win. (Though some creators describe what’s happening on screen more than others anyway and Jarvis has always been good about it!!!) anyway thanks for the accessibility!!! I super appreciate it

[@chaosdisembodied5483]

He also has regular subtitles that aren't auto generated which make it accessible for me as a deaf person. He's doing great with accessibility

[@JustMakayla865]

“certified plumber Boy certified heart attack” 16:27 I started dying!😂😂😂😂 You need to make a parody song

[@katiesilva6624]

"i know for those of you that like to watch my videos while you're eating, maybe don't this time" me looking down at my totinos, my first meal of the day: but what am i to do then???

[@moonshinershonor202]

7pth because you can fit one more in there

[@Kuchhh]

Something else! 😂

[@readtheroom831]

He said it as I took my first bite of dinner 😂

[@jomarthegreat1]

Fucking lost it at "certified plumber, certified heart attack" 😂 stay gold, Jarvis

[@TheSapphireSprit]

He’s a certified plumber, she’s a certified nut.

[@michaelwalker1017]

Jarvis: "and Im sad" *furiously rethinks* "life has its ups and its downs" (phew, saved it Jarvis. No one will know)

[@starchivist_]

i think the funniest part to me is that based off the videos with her face / her house in the background, her house actually looks pretty nice?? so i'm imagining a pristine, well decorated house with a stove in the kitchen that is so unfathomably crusty and full of just random stuff that may or may not spontaneously start on fire

[@lini0024]

For those curious bigbackmeals refers to a tiktok trend where people would reference their own bigback meals where they would eat large quantities of food. Fedisbest refers to an idea in parenting circles that says it’s better for your child to be fed over them eating the healthiest possible meal. (Ie it’s better for them to eat chicken nuggets than go hungry)

[@IndieHellCat]

I think fed is best refers specifically to the breastfeeding vs formula argument, its meant to move away from shaming of mothers over which they feed infants

[@ona512]

@@IndieHellCat maybe it was co-opted

[@MsSphinx91]

From the Fed Is Best Foundation : A fully fed child, whether they are fed with breast milk alone, formula alone, or a combination of both, will have better health outcomes and brain development than an infant that is malnourished from a failed attempt at exclusive breastfeeding without adequate milk supply, which is why we say, “fed is best."

[@samanthageorge6447]

this was very informational thank you

[@lini0024]

@@IndieHellCat True! I’ve just personally more so seen it used by people with autistic and/or picky children

[@ravyntaylor6982]

I much prefer watching my rage content through Jarvis like god intended

[@elllisgrey]

they’ve been a nasty chef nasty

[@twisterzs]

i've been a nasty cook nasty

[@mightymeatymech]

is somebody gonna match her freak 😔😔

[@zniffl]

I’d find it very entertaining if a sexy woman was making intense eye contact while cooking the most vile shihh

[@lithat8581]

Is somebody gonna match my leek?

[@gusguslvr]

is somebody gonna match her freak😞

[@SarahPoz]

why did “grinch of salt” make me lol

[@m1nion_l0v3r]

9:31 cooking was so outrageous jarvis had to spit 😭

[@Stew_Ballz]

LMAO was looking for a comment mentioning it, I couldn't help but notice

[@pawtrichor]

14:21 : this is what my cat usually leaves on the carpet as a gift for me :)

[@Floofie_boi]

I'm premium

[@Goby-c4l]

Yes you are

[@granchito]

and im gold

[@Violant3]

I can't believe this channel and its contents are premium but still free, very cool

[@JustacommenterLol-ic4cu]

No way me too

[@ellismiles9109]

hi premium

[@crushworthyxo]

I see these types of videos on SnapChat a lot. I know they’re rage bait, but it’s impossible not to think “what are they doing?! They are crazy for thinking this is edible!”. I get even more enraged when there’s some “hype man” behind the camera going “mmm, yum, looks delicious!” ☠️ Thank you Jarvis for validating that these videos are wild!

[@stupid4parx_]

Jarvis mentioning that we might not be watching the screen feels like breaking the forth wall

[@octopus8978]

10:17 SHES so thoughtful even tried to fry the ketchup for him 🎀🎀💕💕💕💕💕🔥😊

[@kaelyn5426]

13:46 just putting this time stamp here so i can rewatch that clip 12 times

[@januarymilk9347]

the food SLAPPED into the pan while maintaining direct eye contact sent me

[@toreole]

5:58 "It is interesting to live in a world" - Jarvis Johnson, 2024

[@realtehen]

so true

[@jcarter2023]

Jarvis I am having such a stressful week with my kids husband and job everything feels like it sucks, and when I’m so mad I feel like I’m going to explode I put on your videos like this and the silliness plus your deep voice brings my stress down to a manageable level. Thanks for helping me not blow a gasket this morning ❤

[@robokyluver985]

that's lovely jessica

[@stephniay]

0:06 '😩😜☺️gOOOooold' tickles my brain so well

[@AnOriginalSpin]

Everytime Jarvis makes reviews on nasty food I have to prepare in advance mentally and physically so I don't throw up or get angry

[@SmilingCorpse]

Or throw up while angry. The rage puke, if you will.

[@zebrabitch7821]

🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

[@Sarah-vo2qu]

The vibes she’s giving is girl in the playground pretending to cook leaves and sand finally getting her hands on actual food ingredients

[@larkasmr1128]

I actually REALLY appreciate the explanation of the visuals at 1:30 😭😭 almost anytime im watching youtube im doing something else, this time my nails, and i just had to mention how thankful i am

[@ona512]

true i even tend to watch new videos while travelling to the store or to work so good to know this is almost expected (tho i do feel bad not watching when im travelling aha)

[@bea2323]

SAME! Its so appriciated

[@alexlewis1603]

This girl is the best rage bait I've ever seen. The prop pizza and onion absolutely kills me

[@sunnycitruss]

10:26 jarvis we harmonized together i hope you know we sounded great

[@CinnamonsunTV]

“If you add too much salt, u must halt…. 😟… Cooking… cause you messed it up 🤓” - Jarvis Johnson, 2024

[@r0tten.b0y]

As an autistic person with food sensitivites, this video actually killed me. Just died on the spot. The funeral will be next wednesday.

[@1ndiasmusic]

RIP

[@GhoulishlyPale]

Rip 😔

[@VRCommy]

To be fair, a lot of them say “cook my husband a balanced meal”, not “I cook my husband a balanced meal” (which she obviously doesn’t) So maybe it’s a plea. And if my cooking was like that, I’d probably also record it and put it on the internet with hopes that someone would cook a good meal as I’m begging for and save my partner’s life. 🤷🏼‍♂️

[@tyelork]

It's really badass, Jarvis just giving out all his premium GOLD content to all of us premiums for free.

[@kittymilkyyy]

1:19 As someone who was not looking at the video at that moment, thank you lol. I like to crochet and listen to videos at the same time so I’m not always looking at the video.

[@hilarycooper8660]

I appreciate you describing what she's doing because you know I'm doing art when watching this. This channel IS premium!

[@paranoidlizard6338]

5:57 i want you to know a thought just entered my mind; and it was “this is boy dinner.” I don’t think this woman hates her husband, i think this is her husband’s favorite little treat to have after an incredibly long and strenuous day of work

[@kwarra-an]

Thinking back to the time my boyfriend ate a raw green pepper like an apple and called that supper (ironically, he is a fantastic cook)

[@dianamerchant1026]

The oven randomly catching fire got me. I started snorting laughing.

[@u0432865]

“A grinch of salt”

[@MajorHarvestMoonFan]

Conspiracy theory, in the video at 15:30 she says her husband who may or may not exist and is also a plumber works in the North Sea oil rig, but she's got Houston texans merch? It's sneaky promotional content for Still Wakes the Deep.

[@ashleeminnow8453]

Goldmember shouting "gooooold" in the intro will never not make me giggle

[@frog_goblin]

these ones are genuinely funny to me. it feels like an evolution of food-based ragebait content that has existed long before tiktok became a thing. the videos with her face in them exude the same energy as boomer “i hate my wife” jokes but reversed. she fucking hates her (fake) husband and hopes he dies out at the north sea oil rig. she throws shit in that plastic bag with such anger. she’s embodying what it feels like to be a fast food service worker during lunch rush dealing with a bitchy customer. i’m obsessed

[@Boxhatable]

Bro cracked a magic pack right before filming

[@zephyrbiscuit6873]

I’m glad I’m not the only one who saw those magic cards.

[@lydianelson7464]

He should make mtg content fr

[@kingdingaling3376]

He was having withdrawals

[@abigailhoffman1571]

I love this new thing my favorite commentary KZbinrs are doing where they let us know that they are aware we are doing things like laundry, dishes and running errands while playing these videos. Gotta have my Jarvis Johnson on or these dishes are NOT getting done

[@dakotakl6729]

my doctor literally told me to eat more salt because of my hypotension and I still think that first "meal" would give me a heart attack

[@redfrenchfries9263]

I haven't started T yet and Jarvis' mustache is giving me gender envy

[@unnwean]

At least it's someone's cool mustache, I've recently got gender envy when I looked at my ex 😅

[@Boo-xb5di]

Buy a fake mustache till the real one comes in, King🤙

[@ArtaxTheWarHorse]

Nah cuz he’s low key really handsome 😩

[@benadrylgelllzzz5724]

You get it

[@flareboi]

@@ArtaxTheWarHorse REAL. jarvis has the kind of charm that makes him like… the guy you would ask for directions because he looks friendly

[@wizardandorlizard]

9:30 love that he never mentions that meteor of spit that launched from his mouth lmao

[@confuzed_colonizer]

I saw that too 😭😭

[@iprobablylikeyoutube]

dont call him out like that🙁

[@polterkitty3639]

He wiped out the dinosaurs again, they’re double dead now.

[@wizardandorlizard]

@@iprobablylikeyoutube he gotta bring out the ukelele for an apology /j

[@toesheo]

Real 😭😩

[@maylen9299]

2:11 that’s Garlic and it doesn’t look like a good one lol

[@noratsuki42]

0:25 You can be the original anything if you're specific enough.

[@megansslore]

That manicure tells me everything I need to know

[@jamiexit]

as someone who has something similar to POTS the amount of salt she is using is about how much i need 😭😭

[@shigekax]

Piece of the shit Part of the shits Partly owning the sabertoothtigerenclosure

[@abstractrea1ist307]

THE WAY IM LITERALLY EATING ON MY LUNCH BREAK and was specifically looking for something to watch while eating LMAOOOOO oh how the turned tables 😭😭😭😭 coming back later Jarvis I pinkie promise 😔

[@biggestastiest]

did you come back

[@isis5888]

I could’ve sworn Jarvis was going to descend into “sometimes you gotta know when to hold ‘em, when to fold ‘em” re: food cooking at different times.

[@maddy_7459]

Plot twist: her husband works a 12 hour shift, and spends the 3 remaining hours at a restaurant after work.

[@alayahhershberger8956]

16:42 😂😂😂 my favroite quote ever