Just Let Them Be And See What Happens To Your Life | Mel Robbins Podcast Clips

[@saraiannaccone1790]

“Let them “ is less exhausting. It’s easy on one’s heart and nerves and on one’s thoughts. It’s all about letting go. You feel lighter.

[@patriciaanderson7903]

So true!!

[@christineclark2479]

In the land of texting, I used to absolutely hate when someone took a ridiculous amount of time to answer. Especially when they initiated engagement. I cannot help but compare it to hanging up on someone or walking out mid conversation in person. I still see it as disrespectful but I’ve learn to let them! Lol!

[@junemedeiros9757]

Thank you! I feel exactly the same way you do. I used to have conversations with my ex and he would just (hang up) disappear whenever he felt like it (usually when I was trying to share my feelings or point of view). Sometimes he would disappear for days. No explanation. No remorse. Even denial that it ever happened. Each time it happened I felt humiliated and thoroughly dismissed. When I asked him why he would leave me on read or ghost me, he would say"On l just forgot to say goodbye"This I let go on for years! Eventually we broke up and do you know why? Because he was a selfish, disrespectful person!. Just like any person who ignores your texts on purpose and thinks it's okay. They are doing it because they are completely disinterested in what you have to say. Thank you so much for the validation! Good for you for illuminating this disrespectful way of texting.You are not alone in feeling this way 🙂 Best regards

[@snowleopard670]

This describes my siblings especially my sister!

[@Mellowmichelle]

Is used to be that way too, until I got busy all the time with kids, work, cleaning and literally just forgot to text back or didn’t see hear their response it’s insane to feel like we have to be available to people 24/7 now due to our phones even mid texting it’s crazy to think we need to hide in a bathroom form the kids or work til your done texting. No good answer for this except we need to get over ourselves and our ego

[@cynthiad4443]

I feel the same because it IS rude and disrespectful, but it shows the character of that person

[@cynthiad4443]

​@Mellowmichelle it's not a matter of being available to anyone 24/7. It's called consideration. It takes 5 seconds to text, "sorry, busy now, ttyl".

[@emsenseable]

It's like you're letting go of the resistance and accepting things as they are. That is more peaceful.

[@ellen823ful]

There is suffering in resisting what is. So, exhale 😮‍💨 and let it go.

[@robertashaffer3950]

Hearing you say "Let them" or me saying "Let them" to myself just took 20 pounds off my shoulders. Wow. Liberating to the max. Thank you yet again Mel. I love love love your podcast. You have no idea how much you are helping me....as well as millions around the globe. You're a blessing for us. ❤🙏

[@carolfactor1865]

Growing up in an alcoholic family, I trained myself to try hard to change everything and everyone. It’s an ingrained habit but I can change it by reminding myself constantly to take care of and focus on myself.

[@rosecowan1556]

“Let them” “ No expectations and your good” 😊

[@blueriver1604]

Sometimes you have to let people learn their lesson. Dont get in the way of their destiny.

[@Mockduck2020]

My boyfriend, who’s been showing up whenever he feels like it and I tell him he treats my house like a flop house and because I wasn’t responding to his advances he accuses me of having someone else and left at 1:00am and I just let him…and then found this. Even though it’s technically tomorrow, this was the best thing that happened to me all day! And I do feel liberated!

[@Kwood10]

You need a new boyfriend…

[@AFAskygoddess]

He's not your boyfriend. He is your boy frenemy.

[@nickknardirell9821]

May you be comforted and accept the answer the Lord provided!

[@patriciaalbertson5183]

Say. Bye bye... He is showing himself. You don't need that crap... And he might be projecting

[@SeanFarFlung]

Tbh, this sounds like you're taking this idea to the extreme. I doubt the intent of this let them approach, is supposed to teach you to be a doormat to other people's controlling behavior. Please don't just let him take advantage of you whenever he wants just cause you're learning to approach the rest of life in a more detached way

[@josiefiddler1645]

My adult children are not speaking to me after I had a major mental health breakdown last summer. It's been nearly 9 months since I was discharged from the hospital and they don't seem willing to talk about it at all. Last week, I ran across a poem by Cassie Phillips called "Let Them" and I highly recommend you seek it out, print it, and reread it daily if necessary. It eases the heartbreak.

[@SparkleAndglitter-pc3ot]

May Allah replace you with better….

[@merrylynnallison6922]

I have this poem on my fridge and I read it daily... How strong you are to have survived the hospital..... People are cruel and this isn't your fault... Keep looking forward and never look back. it's usually our family that damages us the most. 'Let them'.

[@homodeus8713]

What I’m learning is to accept my part in any situation and fully accepting it. Hope you’ve got all the help you need from elsewhere.

[@maryholton162]

I frequently remind myself that I have no control over anyone’s thoughts, words, actions, choices or preferences. However, if that person makes bad choices and reaps unpleasant consequences, I am not responsible for rescuing them. And if say no, they may reject me, another layer of letting go.

[@turnbacktime65]

Well said. ❤

[@lorrainezaring9043]

I loved this video Mel. It reminded me of a comment made to my brother by a marriage counselor - “you don’t have to help the sun come up; it’s going to come up all on its own.” He still doesn’t get it, but after watching your video, I am going to let him not get it. Thanks so much.

[@rvcuisinemarysway]

I love this "Let Them" I also follow this by silently saying a prayer!

[@susanross9415]

It's almost like we needed to be given permission to step back and let go. We aren't always required to fix or help or even contribute in any way. It's enough to be present and witness. I love it. LET THEM.

[@txspacemom765]

I will tell you, I didn't think this was going to work, but I used it when I decided to get divorced. I let him! His true color shown through and I was at peace! WORDS that work!

[@ellen823ful]

Was it ok that he LET YOU let go?

[@txspacemom765]

@@ellen823ful Very much so!

[@StevoSparta-tt5vu]

Okay so let’s say you tried this during your divorce and then he actually reacted positively and in a manner that would have made it work. Would this still have worked for you then? Or would you still have left? See, Its easy to twist things into one’s own mindset based on results

[@22585]

My therapist made me listen to this for my homework. I feel like I can breath now, completely breath for the first time in a long time! Thank you Mel and thanks therspist!

[@geraldineangelamurray3001]

So a therapist your paying I assume is getting you to listen to Mel Robbins free on KZbin. Instead to do her job herself

[@Wishpool]

It's much easier to relax and float downstream than to fight the current by swimming upstream! Just make sure to not "let them" mistreat you. Cut the cord once they show you who they really are.

[@queenbandy3669]

I WILL NOT SUFFOCATE ANY LONGER!! “Let THEM” Thanks for this timely and profound message❤️

[@romanhollow2985]

Had to recently let a 40 year "friend" go. It was getting too one-sided on my part for months. No more. "Let Them" is liberating.

[@geraldineangelamurray3001]

Been there. Done that

[@ellen823ful]

I had a friend just drop me as a friend and I never knew why. So, like Mel said, let them go! I have 2 brothers who never call 📞 even when I had heart surgery. They just didn’t really care. I have to accept it and let them go too. 😢

[@exquisitebiscuit]

I'm sorry, but a 40 year relationship deserves more respect than it was becoming "too one-sided for months," and complete dissolution of friendship. How many months was it one-sided? How many months is 40 years? How do the months of one-sidedness compare to the length of the friendship? Was it one-sided all along? I think in our disposable age it is easier to dispose of people than to have difficult conversations. I think friendships deserve difficult conversations and abandoning friends and family is cowardly.

[@AFAskygoddess]

​@exquisitebiscuit , that's what YOU think. That doesn't make your choice correct for everyone else in the universe. Calling someone you don't know, who is valuing herself, "cowardly" is so reprehensible. I made a painful decision to let my 30 year "friend" go recently for the same reason as this original commentor. Having a discussion about my decision would have only made me look clingy and desperate. I was neither. Like her, I chose to associate with others who truly valued me and I LET HER do the same. Don't let the history keep you in misery. Your comment really made me cringe.

[@exquisitebiscuit]

@AFAskygoddess Yes, that's EXACTLY what I think. I am glad I made you cringe and to say that someone whom YOU don't know is "valuing" themselves is presumptuous. That reeks of psuedo-therapy platitudes. I am disturbed that people are so easily discarded over perceived slights.

[@imanii4u]

Indeed! We can’t control others. Though, there’s a flip side. We teach others how to treat us. Hoping that this “let them” theory doesn’t lead to disrespect, dishonor, and abuse.

[@hazel9903]

Part of being assertive is taking responsibility for the way you allow others to treat you. People need to keep boundaries in place also.

[@karinski58]

So many times we don’t do something we want to do because of being afraid that another person will get mad. Years ago I decided that if my husband was going to be mad at decision I made, I would just let him be mad. It was life changing. It sparked dialogue and he never got as angry as I thought he would. We’re now on 32 years.

[@tysonwaldo4680]

This shit works. I have used it better part of the week, and it has me relaxed in a way I have not been in a long time.

[@kaytlinrainemusic]

Mel, there's a beautiful elderly woman who reads a piece of literature centered around the concept of "let them", and it's so profound and it's the first thing I thought of when this video was suggested to me. If you happen across it, I think you'll find that it's a lovely and simple take on this concept you're sharing as well. Thanks for this content, surrender is huge and as an alcoholic and narc abuse survivor in recovery who's coparenting with the narc, "let them" is extraordinarily simple but not easy. It's the only way to go on living and not struggle. Thank you 🙏🏻

[@debbie7860]

I heard this poem read by an elder woman and my life changed instantly after yrs of heartbreak by my 2 adult sons 🙏

[@Wishpool]

"In fact, it might be the most memorable part of prom." - great insight, Mel. I had a similar experience at prom in 1984. A group of us rented a limo & had reservations at a very nice restaurant. We arrived late and they wouldn't honor the res, but told us we could wait over an hour for a table. We didn't have time. So, we got back in the limo and went to McDonald's in our formals. I went to 5 proms and don't recall much except that epic moment at McD's. It was a blast! 💃🏼

[@bonniepark6802]

I'm a recovering control freak about 35 years ago I let it go and I love it I love it I love it

[@IvonaFlakus]

How did you "let go"? 🥺🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@patriciaberger5279]

I really needed to hear this today! A friend is battling lung cancer in the hospital and I only get updates when I ask another of her lifelong friends. I’ve sent this person many messages via text without response and she hasn’t answered her phone when I’ve called! It makes me sad because I really do care about her. But at this point I’m just going to have to give up and say “Let them!” and move on! I wish her well but I can no longer put myself through this kind of pain!!

[@geraldineangelamurray3001]

Can't you call someone else and find out how she is?

[@ellen823ful]

I have a friend who just won’t take good care of her health. So, I had to let go and Not bug her anymore. She’ll do what she wants! 🤷‍♀️.

[@MsRocksa]

Another thought that helped me: "it is not about you, it is about that person".

[@egeyermusic]

Some people need to be alone when they are ill or going through something big. It may be crucial self care on the part of your friend.

[@ellen823ful]

@@egeyermusic I need alone time to rest and process my thoughts and feelings. I prefer being outside in my own garden.

[@j.m.221]

I was always the one rallying a group of girls together to have supper and hang out or asking a friend to do something and they never asked me. Invited them to my place but didn't get invites to their place. I realized none of them took the initiative. Way before this video I stopped rallying them together and inviting people out. None of them have taken the initiative and it has been almost a year. I'm good because I realize they were just acquaintances.

[@cramirez5458]

You are 100 % correct, those are definitely not friends.

[@madhuridas4745]

Same here. I cooked many homemade meals for various friends, including my next door neighbour...they all said I d get invited back; but...nothing. not even an invite for a cup of tea. Very disappointed, but wiser now

[@kimdenardo1076]

this is great. not saying it isn't sad sometimes - you truly get to know someone. but letting go of control is sooo peaceful! it makes you not think about it anymore - it clears your mind - so thanks for spreading this

[@ChrisGrayson-zw9ld]

Hello 👋Beautiful Lady🌹..How are you and the weather condition like ?

[@scottyh8494]

This is so important and not to control anyone, It helps to keep control on you and what you want.

[@angiep8217]

I told myself that this morning, “Let Him”, especially when I was tempted to react to his comment last night & I felt unimportant. Should have known this yeeeears ago!

[@captaineleni]

Thank you so much for sharing and talking about the "Let Them" theory Mel. This resonated so hard with me because I recently got a new job and have been trying very hard to fit in. This resulted in some embarrassing social faux-pas for me, and made me dread going to work! I'll adopt the "Let them" theory and just let my co-workers be. Whoever will be nice will still be nice, and I can ignore whoever doesn't want to talk to me.

[@cramirez5458]

Sounds like the typical work place unfortunately, hope it gets better soon.

[@angies5082]

This theory is freeing!

[@nicj5354]

I have something called "let Him". I have learned over the years that i can completely trust my King, Jesus, to work all things together for my good. I don't try to manipulate or control people, because that's rude. I let Him work on their hearts, or work on mine. I don't have to have my own way, i can let Him have what He wants, because ultimately that's what i want anyway. As long as I listen to Holy Spirit and let Him guide me, i know that whatever happens will (eventually) work out. When people do dirty, shady stuff to me, i let Him sort them out. I don't have to seek revenge or justice, because that's His responsibility. I've learned trust and patience. He is Who He says He is, and He loves me.

[@anaknitito]

Love this! Let Him❤

[@melodieneil712]

I love this! Let “him” It makes so much sense but I hadn’t thought of applying it to our Lord!

[@sarahc.7400]

I let them and then let Him. 🙌🙏❤️

[@conniesunga6422]

Yes🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽💕🥰

[@kapaip4656]

Amen 🙏

[@paulaofford9425]

I have only recently discovered you Mel! This has been such a game changer for me. I watched the full ‘Let Them Theory’ podcast and could relate to it so much. I was that person paddling upstream with oars nearly on fire, trying to control every situation, trying to make sure everyone else’s needs were met, trying to make sure that everything happening around me was, I guess, as I ‘thought’ it should be. I was burning out. I watched this podcast, ditched my oars and now just float in my boat.... I feel so much more relaxed and more in control of ME rather than other people. Thankyou. I love what you do and have shared this with others 😘xx

[@merrylynnallison6922]

There's actually a poem called 'Let them' look it up it's so beautiful.... My mother always said this to me while growing up... Especially when I wasn't chosen for a baseball team or included is something my friends were doing. Now I see how wise my mother was.

[@VooDooSue]

OMG!! You labeled this! ❤❤ I have prescribed this thinking in more difficult situations but I now see the power of this thinking in just my daily life. Keeps me focused on what I can control (myself) and not controlling others.

[@hpb19]

I love this! I can think of so many examples of times I could have said "let them."

[@howitworksforme]

I use that all the time. Wonderful! And then start stopping beiing ashamed of being you. ❤

[@smashleel5029]

I need to listen to this everyday. Already have 3 times

[@jennw6809]

What you're describing here is self-differentiation and detachment. Great stuff.

[@DBYouTubeHandle]

I think this is your best video; it’s very insightful, helpful each time I watch it. It’s a sort of mourning, best to accept it as is, although sad, or not preferred.

[@thefacelesscleaner]

I keep coming back to listen about the let them theory, to remind myself - I love it and it truly is life changing… Thankyou so much ❤

[@shivon.shines]

So good! ✨️✨️ Surrender Relinquish control

[@chloebelle4923]

*MEL ~ God BLESS YOU for the vid you just posted* YES, we must acknowledge ALL those being harmed and traumatized right now -- all the innocent families. Thank you! So proud of you for speaking from your heart, instead of toeing the line! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@lanadavis6602]

Yes!! I just watched it too and totally understand why she did not want comments, due to arguments. So glad Mel sees this situation with true humanity, instead of taking a side, under pressure from the current power structure.

[@PhillipGiosio]

Best advice I ever got. This will truly change me for life thank you so much

[@Daisy-w4e]

"Let them" but also let them go, I can not continue to pour into a cup that is not replenishing mine! I need my energy reciprocated 🏳😊❤

[@MountainGram112]

I have been working on letting go of control: Let it go, Let it be. done.

[@sandymcintosh3021]

Hi Mel. Any time you visit the Caribbean island of Jamaica, and you would like to share this gem ( the 'Let Them' theory) with a friend or acquaintance,, try translating it into Jamaican and say "'Low dem" (allow them) a favourite phrase of our wise old fore parents. Thanks for your free podcasts, just what we all need.

[@MsDeniseRaquel]

As a school teacher, this has made such a positive impact. Thank you! ❤

[@Kay-ln3kx]

Yep, this is so true. I just wished I had learned this when I was younger!😊

[@31Alden]

Vital information for our peace and well-being. Thank you, Mel.

[@lisamay-iz4jo]

If I don’t suffocate I feel like I’m not showing I care. Great message Mel. Thank you ❤

[@MsRocksa]

The other part feels suffocated.

[@PhillipGiosio]

This is such a fantastic tool for ourselves to use daily ...and let go yesss yaay

[@unionpier]

This has changed my life as the parentified child

[@lighthousemassageSA]

Mel, I am so grateful for your original Let Them video - there are literally not enough words to describe the positive sea change your words have sparked in me!

[@glitterXX2]

Yes. This attitude has worked well for me over the last few years. I just need everyone around me to join this mentality too

[@mickeymine52]

I had a close friend who emailed me about her 12 year old outdoor cat Her cat had been hit by a car and she told me it was so so hard to watch him die in the bushes on the edge of her property over an 18 hour period. She lied to me about her inability to get help from the Animal Control people or anyone else. I learned this was a lie once I investigated her options. What I have done is to LET HER go. I am still in shock about the way she let this animal suffer It is a terribly painful chapter.

[@doreenmassey7082]

Oh I needed to come across this tonight! Thank you Mel.

[@karennoe1001]

Mel thank you

[@divinesourceconnection]

I love you. Thank you for your shining your light. You are always on time.

[@elijahvelazquez173]

Damn mad happy I found this pod cast. She really does give great insight. Love this concept Fr

[@juliewatts6145]

I’m one of the 14M viewers of that reel. And ever since then I’ve reminded myself of this and shared it with others. I have a narcissistic SIL that has isolated my brother from the family. He and I used to be so close, our whole life. But she got what she wanted and I have decided to “let them” live their lie and not fight for my relationship with my brother.

[@studentsbox370]

always did your best people as you can and if they want. You should let them and focus what to do brilliant.

[@Mr_Kenneth]

Girl, I've lived by the Let Them rule for years. It bloody works. Great video Mel x

[@sunflowerpower635]

You can't imagine how healing it has been for me to listen to the wisdom of this fine lady, I listened to her reel away from everything and I find it truly liberating 🌷🕊🌷

[@cathygarneau]

These two words just changed my life. Thank you,

[@stephani633]

I love this ! It is a game changer

[@joannehoward100]

Awesome Thank you joe from australia

[@dhmill761]

Awesome!!!! So happy I found you.

[@lindawade1203]

Live And Let Live ❤

[@AngelaSpring]

Thanks, Mel! I needed this dose of reality. :)

[@kimberlytate2623]

THANK YOU MEL🙏✝️👸

[@KimiDoubleU]

Without going back into Facebook where I saw your let them post. I just wanted to drop in on you ANYwhere long enough to say thank you. In a few hours since digesting your LET THEM method, I quietly reached for it 3x - and was flabbergasted at how lol- remedial it felt, didn't realize my forehead was tight til it relaxed from this most effective if not liberating simplicity! Did I say THANK YOU?! Appreciate you, Mel!

[@merin797]

Oh Mel, this is so right on time!

[@hello00_sunshine]

This video has helped me more than you realise. Thank you.

[@stephendaly3621]

Ty for sharing ❤

[@Girlonamission]

When I was a kid I always heard adults answer tattling with (in Italian) a la facia sua. Roughly translated it means that’s on them. Or let them. Natural consequences. It’s the ability to see the risk but letting people learn the lesson on their own good or bad. That’s how we learn.

[@Chrisgraww]

Hello 👋Beautiful Lady 🌹..How are you and the weather condition like ?

[@christinerolf9348]

Gosh i sooo needed to hear this, thankyou

[@MelissaSzarka-cp2cv]

Let them is "laissez faire" in French, a very simple idea. Its not easy to let go of an outcome. Its worth the practice it takes to start let people do whatever they want. What you resist persists!

[@lyno5462]

Thank you Mel. I need to do that with my son. He has a learning disability and doesn't live with me. I just try to offer wisdom to him and he doesn't listen, and it has hurt our relationship. Im always upset and irritated with him. I will try to just let him.

[@mandychomps]

My children Haven spoken to me in 22 years!!! They disowned me after I escaped their abusive father I fully understand how you feel and I empathize 🙏🙏❤️❤️🤗🤗 Let go and let God ... had been a life saver 🙏🙏🙏

[@ukulelekitten15]

Everything in the right context. Sometimes an intervention is called for or necessary. As an example, if someone is bent on harming themselves with dangerous or even suicidal behaviour, just let them? It certainly does depend on the circumstance. But in general, “let them” theory is a legitimately, positive, good practice so as to not “sweat the small stuff”. As the saying goes... “Let go and let God”.

[@traceyross8528]

Omg this is a game changer for me!! It will be my mantra from now on!

[@leevkola274]

Love This ❤

[@RealLearningSpeeches]

Please Keep Providing Us With Such Learning Videos. Thank You Very Much Ma'am! 🙏🙏

[@elblos13]

as someone who used to worry about what other people thought of me, this was extremely important to hear. it really is liberating and also to remember that most of my thoughts are stories in my head.

[@musicmomma1870]

This has helped my co-depend self so much!

[@Stefanie-r1w]

I needed to hear this today.

[@oterawatson8128]

This is very enlightening!!!!!

[@geraldineangelamurray3001]

It all depends on the context of the circumstances. In Mels case she is referring to her Sons Prom night and her compulsion to control. Sometimes we very definitely need to not let it go. For example. My Sons dad used to show up whenever it suited him and I needed to put my foot down and set boundaries and definitely will not let it go

[@DMKarinZeeland]

Agreed. Talking about our needs, wants and boundaries makes us also more likely to connect deeper with people who are willing to do so as well.

[@lucyb7608]

The problem with the “ let them theory” is that when you “ let them” it often comes back to bite you in the butt. For some people need guidance and control to make sure your world later is not affected.

[@Miss.Pennyfeather]

Just as always, your video showed up just in the right moment. Thank you SO much!

[@richardsanchez7268]

thank you for that comment, let them , in love with potential, thats right,

[@RougeRider24]

The Mel Robbins podcast is the best the best show. I always get so much wisdom from her topics. Thank you, team!

[@BettseBirnbaum]

Thank you this really hit home. Hope I can practice this❤

[@J.R-b9s]

Terrific video

[@imbalancedstatus8824]

That has always been approach. And it has been very liberating

[@ananieves9022]

It is such great advice.

[@anewcareerinanewtown]

I think some philosophies teach something like this, that what happens, happens . We can't control it and must let it be. Of course social media takes a well known phrase like 'go with the flow ' and rehashes it as some groundbreaking new idea.

[@joannaevans8247]

I love this ! Thank you ❤