Body Positivity Was Always Doomed To Fail

[@KianaDocherty]

*LIKE and COMMENT for the algorithm!* FlexiSpot is having their Labor Day sale up to 50% off! Use my code KIANA to get an additional $30 off select items on orders $300+ with the link bit.ly/kiana10

[@hiropon2985]

love you, hope you're well!

[@mstly4lg]

Kiana, you slay. You are very much Legoland UK Postcode 💅💅

[@Daykor]

Love your deepdives as usual! You're the best. Your Michigan neighbour who lives in Britain 😅

[@Kimberly34584]

I’ve heard body positivity is about “My body is beautiful.” And that body neutrality is about “My body is.” Meaning that body positivity is more of the social movement and body neutrality is about acceptable being in one-selves body and not labeling your body in any good or bad way, your body just is how it is.

[@lovetemple188]

great topic and covered magnificently 🎉

[@stina9659]

I was born physically handicappede with deform hip bone, give me my movement back, this was supposed to be about us people that cannot change what isnt "normal" about us, burn victims, cancer patients, people without an arm and so on.

[@ouhhoh]

yep, it absolutely kills me that the original body positivity movement started as advocacy for people with disabilities, scars, disfigurements (I feel like that's not the best term, but I don't know the proper alternative), etc. and it was never about this push to be seen as beautiful, it was to be seen as human and worthy of respect. the focus of beauty in the body positivity movement is reductive at best and actively harmful at worst. the point isn't to look hot, the point isn't to be found attractive, the point is to be respected & seen as an equal. the chase for beauty is never ending, it's toxic and creates nothing but collateral damage in the pursuit of something that in the end, means absolutely nothing. because then in 10 years, the beauty standard will change, and the shit show starts all over again these people in the movement now are fat/obese women who want the world to think they're attractive. when the movement started with people who just wanted to be seen as human

[@pettykittyfam]

​@@ouhhohBoth of your comments made me want to cry and also so happy that people DO SEE the truth. These "body positive movements" have been completely taken over and it's shameful. Thank you for speaking out ❤

[@RhamanaChan]

Yeah I'm in a wheelchair with MS, I'd like my movement back also. I don't mind sharing it, but to be excluded because I don't fit their standard and ideal is so insulting.

[@aijamberisabel]

PREACH

[@MusikGirl23]

Yes! I’m 4’8 and lived a childhood of bullying due to my extremely short and small stature (I have Turner syndrome, which can result in dwarfism-women under 4’10-as it did for me). I have nothing against it including those who are part of the fat acceptance movement but to say it was made for them isn’t true, and really hurts the movement as a whole.

[@mariepayne4935]

I’m size 12-14 and hearing that I’m “skinny” to the body positivity movement literally has me shocked 😭.

[@lFurinl]

Same… I’m using 12-14. The standard is mind blowing for me, being called a mid size? 😮I struggle with weight all through my life, but had been losing weight and felt more comfortable right now. Sigh… need to lose around at least 10kgs to be considered normal weight around here.

[@れきし]

literally same

[@fantasticfaith1106]

I’m a size 10-14 and I have a 30 bmi this should not be considered mid size I’m all for loving your body where it’s at but it’s very frustrating when people act like your weight has no real effect on your health. I’ve fluctuated up and down 50 pounds over the past 5 years and there is a big difference between 210 and 155 you feel so much better. Yes people at a healthy weight can be unhealthy but it’s not because they’re at a healthy weight.

[@tarannak25]

How can you not look skinny in front of someone who is a size 26+?

[@charlie2.048]

Just because an SUV looks smaller next to a hummer doesn't make the SUV a sedan.

[@amberrhodes8941]

I was in the morbid obese category and hated how I felt, I was always sick and I was depressed. I changed my habits, fixed my relationship with food and I am now a size 8-10 depending on the pants. I feel great, my health has improved and I was able to stop taking anti depressants. Skinny girls have been SO supportive and kind throughout my journey. Fat girls, not so much, they are the only ones who have made negative comments.

[@MelodyKittyCandy0007]

Hi! That's wonderful! Not many can do what you did...it isn't easy. So please keep it up, your new positive friends will be your support team! When u had progressed, unfortunately some friends that stayed still will bring you down...so yeah mix with new friends n get fabulous together! And keep sharing to inspire others that they cld do it to! You can guide others now! Thats like super valuable , for your info!

[@koolaids-man8668]

You only felt sick all the time because society oppressed you too much! In all seriousness I'm happy for you, scratch that WITH you that you are much healthier and happier now!

[@itsClaptrap]

I've had kind of similar experiences with my weight loss journey, before I started I was bitter and ill mannered. After I started exercising, i felt a little vulnerable and had a couple bad experiences with people that were my size telling me it doesn't matter, it won't change much, blah blah blah _BUT_ I also had some typical gym bros (lean, muscular sorts) support me and praise me for even trying, especially at my size. I guess they also felt some form of pity because I told them I've never worked out in my life, but they seemed genuinely ecstatic I was even trying at all. Fast forward just a couple months of my own personal routine, I can do 30 inclined push-ups (45° angle), 30 squats, and walk 2000 steps without getting tired. All while bordering 300 pounds. (I'm actually 283 now and steadily dropping,

[@itsneonoir3801]

@@itsClaptrap so happy for you! Maybe those gym bros were once where you were and wanted to support you, or maybe they were just decent human beings. Whatever it was, I for one am glad that you had the help. Even if it's one person, it means a lot. Hope you have a steady journey and much happiness!

[@Conval-wi5eh]

The stories in this comment section warm my heart. Thank you all for adressing what immediately popped into my mind when Kiana said "Obese people, they know. They know that it's unhealthy" : How bad your body feels carrying around the extra weight. I have never been obese, but my weight has fluctuated between 130 and 165 lbs (60-75 kg). I am a female of average height (for the western world), so all in all I have had a normal weight my whole life. BUT I remember how awful I felt being on the chubbier end. I didn't work out at the time, and that might have contributed, but damn, I felt bad. My body felt sick, tired and I didn't want to do anything or move at all. I remember being out of breath after taking the stairs. I remember every form of physical exercise feeling like a chore. I cannot for the life of me imagine what it has to feel like carrying 200, 300, 400 pounds. My cousin told me the same thing when she was pregnant: "I am out of breath climbing up the stairs. I have trouble getting out of bed because I physically cannot lift myself. How on earth do obese people navigate life? I am 160 lbs and I already struggle." Of course, your center of gravity is very different when you are pregnant, so this might be a factor as well. Still, I feel bad for everyone being overweighed or obese just for the fact that they probably feel physically sick most of the time. I am so glad you guys are feeling better now. I am rooting for you!

[@tenkosverse]

I just moved from obese to normal!!!!!! im so happy aaaa!!!!! i used to watch these body positivity influencers and just eat and eat and eat but i saw a video from michelle mcdaniel (i think thats her name) and it really woke me up!!! ive been dieting and exercising for the past 7 weeks and ive lost 10 kilos!! (22 pounds)!!!

[@whosafraidoflittleoldme18]

ahh congrats!!

[@SamuelCheung-rc3tb]

I can do nothing but nod in great respect. Congratulations!

[@wogimmmm]

aaa congratulations !!! THATS SO EXCITING !!!!!!!!!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤sending so much love ❤️❤️❤️

[@vintageprue8728]

Congratulations! It’s hard work, but so worth it!

[@bryson9234]

Congrats

[@tessbabcock8169]

My best friend passed away this year of a heart attack at 31. He was fit in college and due to bipolar, depression, and food addiction, he got to almost 500lbs. He was short of breath, sat on the couch with his dad and passed away quietly. If anyone ever tries to tell me obesity isn't unhealthy, Imma lose my shit.

[@starscreamthecruel8026]

Were his medications making him gain weight too? I knew a girl who was BPD, Bi Polar and schizophrenic who complained that the combination of her meds made it very difficult for her to lose weight. She finally had to have one of the gastric bypass surgeries? I think it was the sleeve to have any effect at all but it hasnt made her any happier.

[@ajbaker1213]

@@starscreamthecruel8026 not being funny, even if the tablets were making him gain weight then they were only a supporting factor. You don't get to 500lbs because of your tablets, you get to 500 because you're eating an enormous amount of food.

[@Hellomoon444]

Bipolar is no joke. It ruins the best of us. I’m sorry for your loss. Thank you for telling your story because I felt like maybe that could have happened to me. I got seriously over weight. I was almost 300lbs….I was around 270 when I started working out and I was afraid of the scale so I never did an official first weigh in. I was also very fit in the military and got diagnosed with Bipolar, general and social anxiety, and paranoia. I gained about 145lbs because of the medication and I really think the medication helped me develop an eating addiction. Sometimes I would be asleep and eat. I only know because my sister would tell me and once I woke up with goldfish crackers in my hands and chest. I was so ashamed. I never slept in peoples houses because of that. It was not until I met my boyfriend that he helped me changed my life. I lost about 65 lbs. Kinda fluctuates because of my time of the month. I’m one of the lucky ones…. I got help right at the golden moment I needed. I just wish everyone could also…💔

[@housemana]

saying "due to bipolar, depression and food addiction" as a cause of your "best friend's" meteoric rise from fit to 500lbs morbidly obese is seriously doing a disservice to what actually happened: the DISORDERS didnt stuff food down his throat. HE did. and he paid the ultimate price for it. own up to your fucking actions.

[@MrDiscreet100]

It’s EXTREMELY misleading to call someone who is 500 pounds fit.

[@KarmatheCorgi]

I finally moved from Morbidly Obese to /just/ Obese and I'm excited about it!

[@torturedsouldepartment]

Wooo!! Keep going ❤ you have got this.

[@Pkpdotcom]

Yay!!! Congrats from a stranger on the internet ❤

[@Anonymous-wb3nz]

Good for you! Never give up!

[@stxlaxPP]

Well done!

[@SugaCxbe]

That’s wonderful news! Keep up the great work! 🎉

[@emmarollins5052]

The body neutrality movement is the light side of this movement. It truly represents what body positivity should have been. “I’m fine with my body, and I want to be the best I can be.” That’s it.

[@DeadKraken]

And feeling validated by not hating but not loving your body either, is very important, much more important that lying to yourself and others all day about how amazing your body is. I hated my body for a long time, and at a certain point you just accept the fact that you will never love it, but I can...accept it as it is, and make it a little better by taking good care of it. I've never met a person which the OG body positivity movement was about(cancer patients, ppl with disabilities, ppl with illnesses, scars etc...)that would actually say that they are happy with the body they have, that they will not change anything about it given the possibility, so the shape the movement took some years ago really rubbed me the wrong way.

[@blackmber]

I don’t know everything about the movement, but I first heard some of the ideas several years ago and it really stuck with me: our bodies are not decorations. Beauty is irrelevant to most of the experiences that make life meaningful.

[@AspireGMD]

You should never be fine with being obese, you shouldn't hate yourself, but you should never act like there isn't significant consequences and should always want to better yourself.

[@hoa3901]

i would say not hating yourself means wanting to better yourself, but also realizing regardless of weight you carry the same amount of worth as a person, someone who deserves to be healthy. however i do think that people both for and against body positivity place too much of their issue onto how it looks and then disguising it as a take related to health ("people can be healthy and beautiful at *concerning weight*" and then "i'm just telling this random person they look horrible and disgusting because i care about their health!") the truth is obese people should lose weight because they owe themselves that health (and sometimes the people in their lives, i know some parents work to lose weight so they can be more involved and better able to take care of their kids) but not because they owe other people conventional beauty. (in sum, i agree with you, just adding on a bit) @@AspireGMD

[@skrittle555]

@@AspireGMD the message of body neutrality is to stop caring how your body LOOKS and focus on your health and all of the amazing things your body can do for you.

[@JayR-wg9jq]

ive had so many people call me "disgustingly" or "painfully" thin to the point where they cringe. why am i supposed to be thankful for that?

[@curlyhairblacklilacs]

I was a size 8 in college. I had a plus sized girl tell me that she could “break me over her knee.” It’s been 10 years and I’ve never forgotten that. No one deserved to be SHAMED for their body. Yes, even small bodies!

[@alicemadness999]

@@curlyhairblacklilacs well no wonder it stuck with you thats so fuckin nasty

[@ravenID429]

@@curlyhairblacklilacs Should've told her you could use her as a raft LOL

[@DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro]

I’ve had a fat family member bully me mercilessly for around a year for being skinny, a result of my genetics and being an insomniac who’s often too tired to eat. She only stopped because she was forced to, and even then she’ll still try again once and awhile. She’s fat because she eats too much and too often, a direct consequence of her own choices. I’m too skinny because I’m struggling with a health problem out of my control, and just being built this way. I can easily tolerate other people teasing me about it, sure my build looks kinda funny. But what’s not okay to me is when someone who absolutely does not permit any sort of comment being made about _her choices_ turning around and bullying me for something I can’t help. She’s mocking me for having a health problem that is ruining my life, all while throwing tantrums should you dare mention her poor choices. She’s been given nothing but support, her mom shutting down anyone who even mentioned her weight. Some of that was done rightfully, most of it has only served to coddle her and make her feel entitled to the respect of others that she hasn’t earned. Insecure fat people are a whole other level of cruel at times, because they weaponize the kind natures of those around them against those same people.

[@JayR-wg9jq]

@@DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro im so sorry you have to deal with that from your mother of all people, but i definitely know exactly what you're talking about. i had a high school friend who relentlessly went after me about my weight because she was insecure about her own - it eventually snowballed into her spreading rumors that *i* was bullying *her* about her weight. not fun times

[@xlipuduchru]

"the dream was good, the dream is good, it's the dreamer who is corrupted." Really feels true for body positivity.

[@louisgreen3071]

who said that?

[@xlipuduchru]

@@louisgreen3071 Storm from X-Men to Magneto x)

[@victordonavon292]

The dream was based on false foundations. In this case, the dream due to poor foundations is in itself inherently bad. Rewarding bad behavior does no favors for anyone.

[@kaoryakasaka6835]

​@@victordonavon292 you're mistaking body positivity for haes. Original body positivity was about not judging people based on their bodies' looks, but those haes folks twisted it into "obesity is healthy". So yeah, the dreamers are hell messed up here.

[@katelijnesommen]

@@victordonavon292 the original idea that all bodies deserve respect and that a person's value isn't tied to their body was a good foundation. Sadly that got totally twisted into "all bodies are healthy and if you say otherwise you're judging people", which is stupid and damaging.

[@patriciafrancis9134]

I was also overweight growing up and I recall speaking with a girl in my class who was extremely thin. No matter what she or her doctor did she did not gain weight. She had the same miserable body image and self-esteem issues I had.

[@MZB80]

Yes, I'd had girls in my practice who couldn't gain weight no matter what they did - one was even 'diagnosed' with an ED. Pretty much forced to eat all the carbs... bread, pasta, etc. Turns out, she had coeliac disease. The more bread & pasta was pushed on her, the sicker she got. It wasn't an ED - she literally couldn't absorb nutrients. Once the correct dx was made, she was able to start eating & gaining weight, but the damage was done - took a very long time to sort her gut out so that she could just eat normal portions.

[@bloddrinkeraka]

People say they're "not gaining weight" but if they actually counted calories, it would be under 1200 calories. Or they have some kind of physical disease.

[@TheKrispyfort]

Had a friend call me lucky for being so skinny in highschool. I went off and told her making comments about my skinnyness was as bad as someone making comments about her being fat. She didn't like it and neither did I because neither of us had control about it. What people didn't know was my mother was seriously restricting my diet, amongst other abuses, because she didn't want me to be as chubby as I was prior to getting measles at 5yo and losing most of my 5yo body weight. My mom has serious issues

[@ShannonFLH]

i was and still am one of those extremely thin people. my biggest problem is i have ulcerative colitis and it is possible to gain health weight; tpn ,high calorie shakes, high calorie dense meals, plus exercise to build muscle. the trouble i had was i would successfully gain weight only to lose it either by a flare up in my disease, sick, flu, etc. bottom line is no one knows exactly what someone does or eats 24/7 so if you gave nothing nice to say then keep your comments to yourself. just in my opinion anyway :)

[@Valentina_Lat]

Your mother caring about your health and wanting you ro end up unhealthy and over weight or obese is not a bad thing. Please get your head out of your ass

[@lisamoul263]

This whole thing has always bothered me. I struggled with anorexia for over 20 years. I’m 5’7” and at my smallest, I was 82 lbs. 11 years post-therapy and at 43 years old, I’m up to 124 lbs and have a much better relationship with food. Why shouldn’t I feel positive about how far I’ve come? I’m proud of myself because anorexia took over my life and I’ve conquered it.

[@oliviaw.2842]

I'M proud of you !!!

[@lisamoul263]

@@oliviaw.2842 thank you ❤️

[@indy_go_blue6048]

I started packing it on at 34... I remember well feeling "stuffed" all the time, but I didn't do anything about it. At 70 I was 5'9 (medium build) 215#. (I had minor surgery a few weeks ago; I rem my nurse saying "I can't believe you ever weighed 215." Well, I did. I finally started dieting about 18 months ago; I now weigh 162; it feels good and I'm proud of it (except I lost fat all over my body and now I'm the stereotypical saggy skinned guy.

[@seemakazmi965]

Good for you! Ignore the negativity and focus on your hard won achievements

[@thomaskositzki9424]

Word! Been through 30 years of mental health problems which had me suicidal at one point, so I have a slight idea of what you have been through. You have all rights to celebrate your achievements and enjoy yourself and your body! 🥳😃👍 But sorry, you are not morbidly obese so no body positivity movement for you... Just ridiculous, isn't it? What a bunch of clown shoes. 🤣🤣🤣

[@verthandijal]

we need less "everyone is beauty everyone is fuckable" and more "beauty is not a measure of worth" and "only being nice to people you find fuckable isn't being nice"

[@elliotfong8794]

Egg Zact Lee THANK GOU

[@ClaireEmilia]

Perfectly said 👏🏻 it truly concerns me that a lot of women are so obsessed wether they are seen fuckable or not by a man

[@pagetvido1850]

It's disturbing how many people only think someone is worthy if they want to have sex with them. What's worse, is the number of people who want to please those terrible people and be in relationships with them. Why? Ignore them and leave them to fertilize their screens.

[@youre764]

Maybe it's just because I'm asexual and can't relate to those feelings but the implications that someone isn't worthy or doesn't feel worthy unless everyone can find them sexually attractive, sounds sooo harmful, especially coming from a movement that is supposed to make people feel good

[@electricfishfan]

Let’s be specific, by the way: it’s males, men who only treat women nicely when they’re attracted to them, and women who are groomed to support this value system and conform as an aspect of misogyny. Women then devalue other women deemed unattractive (to men) and participate in secondhand abuse. The whole issue is very traumatic how it plays out in society, down to the smallest gendered interactions. It’s disgusting.

[@CSRaeburn]

What gets me about body positivity is when I celebrate that I'm losing weight... and the responses I get are "You should be happy with your body the way it is!" "Your body can't change, just accept it!" "You're fine the way you are!" "YOU CAN FIND LOVE! A CERTAIN GROUP OF PEOPLE LIKE YOUR BODY TYPE!" and it's that last one that gets me riled up, because the people who *like* my body the way it is now? They are cockroaches, and I do not want them around. ... if my body wasn't capable of change, I would not have lost body fat, my deadlift would not have gone from 50kg to 115kg, I would not have gone from a simple bridge to a full wheel in yoga. My body, my choice. It's not fatphobic for me to want the best for my body, and the best in my opinion is losing body fat.

[@misterthatguyjake]

The people that have wanted to date me since I've been heavier have been the biggest motivator in wanting to lose weight. And congrats on the Full Wheel!

[@yerfavpsycho]

THIS, whenever I tell people I'm losing weight and they tell me that it pisses me off and kinda makes me lose steam, bc now i feel like I'm not being my "true self" all because i dont wanna be in physical pain at 27

[@CSRaeburn]

@@yerfavpsycho Keep going. You are your true self no matter what you do. If losing weight helps you feel like you, keep going. Congratulations on the progress you've made so far!

[@MeeYeeWeeWee]

They're projecting on to you HARD and it makes them upset and envious that you were able to lose weight. Don't listen to them, they're crabs in a barrel trying to pull you down.

[@BronzeDragon133]

If it's any consolation, it's true of the other end of the spectrum too. And every point on all possible spectra, I'm sure. I work out constantly, I have muscles. Lots of muscles. I don't attract the best crowd, just the ones that want a muscular man. I had to throw back a lot of duds before I found my husband.

[@PupCake1025]

Not me being told I didn’t belong in the BP movement after spending hours crying and looking up scoliosis fashion to try and hide my back brace in high school and being told to “even out my shoulders” and “stand up straight” for photos✊😔 (For any fellow scoliosis girlies, a sweater and an infinity scarf may no longer be The Look but it can cover a lot without looking like you’re actively trying to cover a lot. Pair with skinny jeans and boots for a very cute cold weather outfit.)

[@lycheemyusic]

I have scoliosis too though it's relatively mild. I have a v small curvature in my c spine,and larger curvature in my lumbar/lower thoracic spine. my hips are very obviously tilted, and my pelvis is also twisted toward the right. I do get kind of self conscious because I am a dancer and I worry I look weird in certain poses.. it also makes working out a pain. Deadlifts help so much tho!

[@Lilnaomi3]

I don't personally have this medical condition but there are several youtubers that do. Bernadette Banner has a historical fashion/costuming channel and has creatively worked with her spines shape. if the curvature is a concern you can experiment with fashion padding to fill spaces or create a more even illusion. You could also play with layering asymetrical garments like in mori, strega or post apocalyptic fashions. If your into retro things, power suits and sharp angles can be tweaked by adjusting seams and shoulder pad thickness. A lot of romantic and goth fashions make use of corsets and those can have soft boning, selective bone channels moved or a piece of fabric can be used inside to fill space. Drapey, flowy items like cardigans and dusters could disguise a brace. Fashion should be fun for everyone and hopefully more inspo will become available.

[@ladymacbethofmtensk896]

​@@Lilnaomi3I was going to bring up Bernadette Banner!

[@ghost8214]

aw man. this one got me. i’ve had severe scoliosis my whole life(2 spinal fusions) and lemme tell u.. middle school was rough. hated that fucking back brace dude.

[@Summer-sx7xl]

Thanks for the advice y’all. I don’t have scoliosis but I have other things that I want to hide like my misshapen shoulder

[@dixiemixie5386]

"Skinny people want to be oppressed so bad" -the person who wants to be oppressed so bad

[@Cafeallday222]

My genetics want to oppress me! 😂

[@lycheemyusic]

the fact that this is true

[@garenthal9638]

I think it comes down to they are want beauty privileges hot people get rather than wanting beauty privileges to just not be a thing because then they don’t have to feel bad about being unhealthy

[@Emm325]

Right, as soon as I heard that I laughed…. That is the worst of the worst villain in the so called movement known as the “splotchmaker” she is such a hypocrite that I almost think she’s trolling, but nope, it’s just unbridled stupidity combined with endless entitlement and narcissism. She’s the same one that told non morbidly obese people that the Taylor Swift song “Anti hero” was not for us, only them, when she COMPLETELY missed the message of the music video. That character is probably the most pathetic, self-hating, least self aware “character” in the entire “movement.” Hope she’s saved her social media money, bc once certain sites and movements are no longer, there’s zero chance she’ll function well whatsoever in the “real” world. Her biggest achievement is having people not wanting to be anything like her, in terms of personality or otherwise.

[@kamiiu]

honestly 😭😭

[@Ray-tz8tr]

Marilyn Monroe even hated parts of her own body and to me that is absolutely WILD

[@gustavus0013]

No really how, she looked normal ?? 😭

[@kamiiu]

as an adult woman who is petite to the point I constantly get told I look like a middle schooler and that no man will find me attractive bc I don't look like a woman, it's so insane to see how body positivity is actually NOT inclusive. I've been bullied my whole life bc of being thin genetically, and if I dare say something about my struggles online it'll immediately be invalidated or I'll be called an attention seeker. it's so sad. I would never invalidate someone else's experiences bc I haven't gone through what they've been through, why is it so easy for people to invalidate mines. ive just learned that the internet is usually a shit show and to keep my struggles to myself 😭

[@indy_go_blue6048]

Why do ppl who say they get bullied continue to care about what others think about them? It's disgusting, even more disgusting now with all this internet "social media" garbage. Grow up.

[@dawnsalois]

I remember how boys used to talk about skinny girls and it wasnt pretty. I am sorry for the harassment you had to endure.

[@MsClrs]

@@indy_go_blue6048are you mad? Get a life!

[@DackRedd-q5z]

They listen to other people and care about other people's opinions because it allows them to be victims and get attention. It also helps to internalize what other people say. This allows them to not be responsible for their weight. The whole anxiety excuse for weight issues is ridiculous. America is the easiest place in the world to stay healthy and make a good living. I would love to take all the anxious people to places where daily survival is difficult. Those people don't say they are anxious. They say get out of my way, I need to get out and make money. A Christian woman who lives in Afghanistan who is lesbian and pregnant. And who advocates for women's rights should have anxiety. But their level of anxiety is lower than the spoiled and pampered American citizen. Nobody starves in the United States. Nobody dies in America because they don't have money for medical care. Please don't tell me how uninsured die because they can't afford treatment. I have been in health care for decades. In the er we treat everyone that comes in, the exact same. Everyone gets the best care we can give. Let's toughen up America

[@LvUhcX]

Did you try to look stronger?

[@muldersimp2052]

Love how at 5'3 and 200 lbs I'm apparently in between mid size and small fat. Any medical professional would roll their eyes at that "fatness scale."

[@dawnelder9046]

I was an inch taller at the same weight before going on the old British diet in the prologue of Good Calories, Bad Calories and getting seed oils out of my diet. I barely fit into a size 18. Been a size 6/8 for over 13 years now. Still far from a stick. I was full fledged fat at 200 pounds. Not a small fat or a mid fat. I was a 6/8 when I was married 42 years ago. My waist was 22 1/2 inches. Same size decades later and I have a 28 inch waist. So the size 18 of my youth, which was considered fat at the time, is way smaller than the 18 that I was 14 years ago. So when I was young an 18 likely was a small or mid fat. Now you are full fledged fat.

[@Buffalo_Soldier]

[edit - removed all - I was typing incorrect stuff ("there's no bad calories"), and now I want to stop my desinformation from reaching more people, so I removed it. Responses to me are correct.]

[@ian7033-qj9wg]

@@Buffalo_Soldier well thats not true.

[@high-d8872]

I gained 20 kg during lockdowns due to depression medication and got to 80 kg with 170 cm height . My family doctor was concerned because thats adipositas1 😢 . How on earth can a woman that height have 100 kg and not considered fat😂

[@kimberlyf4888]

@@Buffalo_Soldier That's total BS and what food manufacturers would love for you to think. In fact, that's a huge part of their marketing. I eat fat, in the form of real, nutrient dense food, and it's satiating and the foods have actual nutrient. It's also not just about calories, unhealthy crap does not nourish your body, it makes you sick.

[@AHarshman08]

I had a group of friends who super into the Body Positivity movement a couple years ago. When I left my ex I started losing weight fairly rapidly but still healthy. They were so negative about it. They insulted and belittled me. I had just gotten out of a very abusive relationship and this was very mentally damaging. Thankfully I met my fiance who so supportive and doesn't care what I look like, as long as I'm healthy. I'm currently down 100lbs and counting and I feel so much better.

[@LauraJdogmom]

Congratulations. I bet you feel great, and I bet your life is much easier, just in terms of getting around.

[@IZaubermausI]

Good work - I hope you can stay on track! 💝

[@caravanlifenz]

Congrats on becoming healthier. You can guarantee your former friends probably bitch behind your back and say it was you who dumped them as friends when you became skinnier.

[@michellemarrs8080]

I'm deeply sorry for you cause clearly. They weren't real friends if is how their gonna be.

[@CarlosLopez-vl8je]

Misery loves company.😉

[@Alby_Torino]

You can ignore reality, but you can't ignore the consequences of ignoring reality

[@xbreezee]

Now that is a good quote.

[@Cati.Colours]

What if you're now a healthy weight or "Skinny" after years of hard work? Nope, you're no longer marginalized and couldn't possibly have body issues/s 🙄🙄🙄 Great video, Kiana!

[@LifeAfterLosing]

I feel this! I have major body issues even after losing 190 pounds.

[@monossacarideos1999]

there is no such a thing as losing weight, kiana died and got replaced

[@directAction3389]

Actually skinny people are basically marginalized at this point. Norma/under weight is the minority, and overweight/obese is indeed the vast majority of people at this point. And it just keeps getting worse too. If things keep going at this rate there won't be any normal weight people left by 2040 or so.

[@meowsha]

​@@directAction3389and you're fatphobic for not wanting to screw them 🤢🤮

[@KhrysPKreme]

I totally had this issue when I lost 70lbs. It felt so weird to have everyone praising me…Looking in the mirror was a happy and sad event at the same time. I eventually slipped back into old habits… currently working on going back down.

[@SarahSkinnyJeans]

I love the "Mean Girls" transitions with crossing out the things that the movement is not lol

[@KianaDocherty]

LOL thank you for noticing

[@kitnfall]

i love the transition so much too! this is my new fav vid of yours. the coverage, depth of research, supporting videos, the flow of the whole video is amazing@@KianaDocherty

[@raimeyewens7518]

The body positivity movement is the only movement where no movement at all is required

[@SarahSkinnyJeans]

@@raimeyewens7518 lol awhh

[@LifeAfterLosing]

That’s what I noticed too! Good attention to detail.

[@TourniquetTwin]

As a thin person with debilitating body dysmorphia, who has always had body issues, I thank you wholeheartedly for this. I feel like whenever I speak up about my own issues, I get assaulted by a less thin person screaming body positivity and berated for compliment hunting, which I most definitely do not do. Am I not allowed to start learning to accept the body I’ve been given? Why is it that only people above a certain weight can gain access to accepting the body they don’t feel comfortable in?

[@judeflowers2813]

preach it sister, preach!!

[@AmberPayson-eu3it]

I suffered from anorexia for 12 years. When I was at my lowest weight, I’m curious to what privilege I had with not getting a period, having anemia, passing out, being mocked for wearing children’s clothes as an adult, isolating myself, and being laughed at for being a “skeleton”? This movement was absolutely disgusting to those who suffer from eating disorders. There’s no privilege in having anorexia; it’s hell on earth .

[@Atheria444]

Yep. @@AmberPayson-eu3it

[@Yaminoeyes]

@@AmberPayson-eu3it I went through the same thing! Anorexia, body dysmorphia, shunned by any people who say I should accept who I am-- guess what? I have a medical condition that makes it hard to gain weight. So I should feel bad about how I was born? So many people say 'yes'.

[@straawberryfieldsforever]

I struggle with anorexia and honestly this shocked me. I have a friend with an ED too (bulimia or binge eating) and they open up to me about it so I thought I could too. Big mistake, he says that I have the "easy disorder" that since im thin I can't really complain about it. I feel so isolated the only people I have left are... other anorexics and good luck trying to not sink deeper

[@sc-th8vx]

I bought this shirt that had an outline of a curvy woman and said "goddess". And now because i don't want to be lumped into that toxic delusional group I'm too embarrassed to wear it. I really liked it too. Makes me sad. I am overweight. I Was about 120 lbs overweight. I have managed to lose 50 of it. 30 on my own and 20 after weight loss surgury so far. I am in the early stages after the surgury. (4 weeks in) I'm seeing sooo many positive effects on my body. Feeling less pain, facial hair that started on my chin some years ago due to the weight has started disappearing, I am sweating sooo much less. And I I can see my face structure coming back to how it was before I gained all that weight. I am happy and its hard work but its worth it.

[@hamsterama]

I'm happy to read your comment! Mainly the thing you wrote about facial hair. I'm 50 pounds overweight, but I'm working hard to lose it. Years ago, I started to grow dark hairs on my chin. About two years ago, the facial hair started growing under my jaw, and on the front of my neck. And now I'm starting to get a mustache, too. I shave every day, because if I didn't, I would grow a beard that could rival any man's. I'm really glad to hear that your facial hair has begun to disappear. That gives me hope that my male pattern facial hair will disappear as well, once I get down to a healthy weight. Anyway, if you like that shirt, don't let it just sit in a closet, wear it at home!

[@cadenandthegirl]

I briefly got involved in the body positivity movement while I was recovering from anorexia, because I wanted to feel…positive about my body. I tried to feel confident as a Size 6 (up from a 2!), I tried to love my tummy, I tried to celebrate my weight gain. I had people in the movement tell me that I was just co-opting the struggles of people with “actual eating disorders,” and…yeah. No more need be said.

[@straawberryfieldsforever]

Omg that is so so sad and isolating im sorry some people were so out of touch like that

[@margodphd]

Yeah, I'm in the same boots and it seems there's no place for us, eh? I don't know I'll ever feel comfortable over a zero.

[@cadenandthegirl]

@@margodphd You can do it!! The road to recovery is a long and difficult one, but we’re all in it together. Restricting really is an addiction and we’ll probably struggle against it for a very long time, but it’s all about the small victories. I’m up to 130 from 95, and I can finally sit in a 70° room without shivering, and I can go up a flight of stairs without losing my breath. Focus on how you’re feeling and ignore the mirror. I’m rooting for you! 💜💜

[@poro9084]

oh sh.. that feels so destructive, hope you are feeling better now

[@dons9213]

Yikes. People can suck.

[@Kangamoos]

Back when I was at my largest, I joined some body positivity groups to try and find people to connect to. It was then I learned that as a "small fat" I was taking up too much space. At least half the posts in the group were about how we weren't welcome. So I left those groups, and realized I belonged nowhere. Now my body is much smaller, and I know they would consider that fat phobic too, but I love running up stairs without being winded and having normal blood pressure.

[@Maerlyns]

That's personally my main reason why I dislike the current movement. I stumbled over this video, and mainly saw a "good idea gone wrong due to entitled people" thing going on. I firmly believe in HAES and body positivity, but BOTH don't mean "celebrate your body and do nothing for your body to feel better", because both are about loving your body and treating it accordingly. HAES in specific is to accept that not all bodies are the same, and eating a healthy and nutritious diet as much as possible to you, doing fitness as much as possible, doing all kinds of self-care etc as much as possible for you. It's not about hating on anyone who's thinner than you, it's learning that you should not hate *yourself* for your body not being the way that is mainly portrayed as desirable in society. In short, focus on healthy behavior, not on looks. Like you said: Doing regular things without being winded, reducing symptoms of illnesses. That's probably why it's called "health at every size" and not "healthY at every size".

[@LaitoChen]

Good job stranger. I don't know you but losing that weight was one of the best decisions of you life that will reap benefits for decades. Have a good life 🎉

[@daveyisnotunusual]

The irony from them of calling you a "small fat" who was "taking too much space"

[@transcendantviewer]

Forgive the joke, but I'd have replied "Of course I take up too much space! That's why I'm here! I want to belong somewhere!"

[@Incomudro1963]

@@Maerlyns "Good idea gone wrong" sums up many such movements. From BLM, to me too.

[@SomnusLucisCaelum]

Body positivity as it was presented to me was supposed to be an umbrella term for people to accept their bodies with all their imperfections, since a lot of them can't be fixed by diet, exercise or surgery. It wasn't about complacency, simply a way to have self-esteem and self-love to avoid falling into EDs or addiction due to body dysmorphia while striving to be a better version of ourselves

[@Sir_Gerald_Nosehairs.]

I always thought it was meant to be something for the disabled, disfigured and dysmorphic rather than anything much to do with weight as well. "Accept your body as it is" isn't a bad message for those with body issues they cannot prevent or control. That's very different than "Wreck your health and rejoice in it" which seems to be the fat acceptance version.

[@kyanblevins3431]

You can always change ur body if ur obese or skinny but most people don't wanna put in the hard work and put the fork down

[@BookSquirrelUK]

Exactly. I used to have a neighbour who had an accident, and afterwards was paralysed and needed to use a wheelchair. A fee years later, he found out about pilot courses for disabled people and got his license. That to me, is an example of what body positivity should be. Accepting yourself, but not giving up, and not viewing people through their limitations, scars etc.

[@lainiwakura1776]

The first time I heard about it, it was associated with fat people already.

[@meh7970]

My version is somewhere along the lines of: "I don't hate it being oberweight and it doesn't mean I won't work out in order to get stronger and healthier"

[@ChoppedCheese95]

Back when I was on Facebook, like 2015-2016, I tried to get accepted into a body positivity group. They refused to let me in. I was told I wasn’t fat enough to be in there. Mind you, I’m 365lbs, 3X/24 in bottoms. I was so confused. Then, I did manage to get in one and the rules of the group was nuts. Essentially, Anyone below a size 20 was literally not allowed to speak. No posting, no commenting, nothing. They were only allowed to be observers. No posting about fitness, or the desire to get healthier. And let me tell you, when Adele lost her weight? The collective outrage was absolutely insane. I got the hell up out of there. It turned me off sooooo bad.

[@blackgirldiary2363]

I’m dead with laughter at the fact that I’m “small fat”😂- like, am I fat or no??? In the meantime, I’m happily enjoying my mission to move from small fat to a mid-sized oppressor! I can’t wait😂😂😂

[@VampireSexGoddess]

Yeaaahhh.....I don't know where I fall but I'm definitely not the size of these of women from this movement. Also, KITTY.

[@meowsha]

😂😂😂

[@ellistea1024]

Yeah, I had NO idea I was ONLY “small fat”! 😅

[@CaulkMongler]

Reminds me of one of my clinical instructors. He once said to me “I had a patient tell me they were pre diabetic. That’s kind of dumb. You either are diabetic, or you aren’t.”

[@sjndfot]

​@@CaulkMonglerno, it's not dumb. People treat diabetes as something binary, but it's not. In fact, keeping an eye on a blood sugar level in comparison to your own previous levels rather than looking at the distribution of the population is the most appropriate way of maintaining health. Because your sugar can go up and still be within the range of normal, but the movement up is giving a hint - one should change their lifestyle cause something wrong is happening. Pre diabetes is same, but the blood is already out of normal range. "Pre" is only there cause you can reverse it at this stage. When it's no "pre" - that's when the real screw up happens. I have a friend who is pre diabetic. He brushes off any doctor comments. He says that he is rich and can afford insulin. The big surprise is waiting for him, and it's not good. You can imagine diabetes as blindness. Person can be on a journey to blindness, but still have chance to reverse it (let's say, glaucoma, the damage is already started but if you start taking your drops you might stop it or slow it down. Half-blond is a term too. So? There is no such thing as pre or half? Cause some instructor without even a biological degree decided to laugh at the name? Lol

[@WileyCylas]

It’s like the pro ana movement. Instead of never being thin enough ur never fat enough 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@lacedsiryn]

EXACTLY.

[@cushionysleet90]

They're not comparable at all what the fuck..? Pro ana is actually accepted by mainstream society. Doctors won't tell you to gain weight unless you're a literal skeleton but they'll tell you to lose weight even if your health problems are completely unrelated

[@Ivory81]

Exactly. Like maybe I’m completely missing their point but how do they expect people to respect them while they hate on and belittle the issues of anyone who don’t look exactly like them. They complain about how people don’t like them ‘because they’re fat’ but refuse to acknowledge that it’s actually because they’re horribly rude people who claim ‘fatphobia’ on anyone who doesn’t coddle them.

[@kaaz1010]

Im deep af in pro ana, its actually not that insane these days, its pretty much just a support place without the constant censorship seen anywhere else Oh and the bonespo is good i guess I actually run the largest pro ana discord server, its kinda funny, i have a lot of interesting statistics, but the saddest one is that... over 1/3 of the members are trans, this includes me. Furthermore, over half self report having ptsd... And the overwhelming majority are not underweight, and only around 10% have actually been diagnosed with an eating disorder. Its such a unique opportunity to collect data like this, as its kinda impossible to do otherwise

[@maisiefrench4424]

@@kaaz1010cringe

[@circcaa0]

I've lost roughly 30kg (66lbs) in the last 2 years and it makes me so happy to prove all of these HAES people wrong ;) its calories in, calories out and that will never change

[@KianaDocherty]

so true hahah (and way to go!!)

[@LifeAfterLosing]

You have done amazing! Great job!

[@RachelJayne92]

You’re amazing! 🥹♥️

[@directAction3389]

Only half right actually. More like a calorie is not a calorie. Why? Which would be worse for you a gallon of orange juice or a pile of oranges? The orange juice of course. It's just sugar that goes straight to your liver. Oranges on the other hand still have actual fiber in them. You won't gorge yourself on them, and the microbes in your gut eat a good portion of them for you anyway. Calories in calories out is true in theory, but the concept of a calorie in and of itself is a drastic oversimplification in terms of nutrition. Just eat real food. Cut out as much added sugar as you can and eat real food. That's all there is to it. The weight just falls right off. You don't even need to count calories really. I'm sure as hell not.

[@leonaheraty3760]

Congratulations! Keep up the great work! 😊

[@Listening_Books12345]

As a midsize woman, I've felt pretty invisible my whole life when it comes to media or clothing. Just this year I saw a mannequin at Walmart that was my size and I stopped dead in my tracks, because what?? You know I exist???

[@munchems]

Same and the problem is that a lot of midsized people are medically considered overweight or obese and yet they’re considered “skinny” or “straight” size by the “body positivity movement”. 😂😂😂 Complete idiocy.

[@ReturnOf962]

I used to hate watching all these channels that called us fat all the time. But I finally hit a point where I realized y’all are just speaking the truth, I was fat, I was unhealthy. Thanks to all of these channels I started a diet and started jogging, I have so far lost 40 pounds and feel better than I have in years. I really appreciate all of you for opening my eyes.

[@krolowahejterow8965]

Congrats on your progress! We are really proud of u ❤

[@atom8o]

YEAAAAAHHHH😈😈😈🎉🎉🎉🦅🦅🦅🦅🔥🔥🔥🔥

[@AspireGMD]

Thank god you didn't fall victim to this disturbing, predatory movement. Wish you the best!

[@MrBannystar]

Good for you for climbing out of the victim trap. Keep going.

[@jgreen9361]

A good thing to know is that being overweight in the first place was very likely not your fault. Ultra processed food suppresses your feelings of being full. In other words processed food actually contains a cocktail of rubbish that fools you into thinking you need more food when actually you don’t. Well done for getting weight off. Big tip for making it easier to keep the weight off. Get someone to show you how to make bread, it does not matter what type. Nearly all shop bread, cakes, pastry etc has emulsifiers, glycerides of fatty acids and other rubbish. Prepare as much as you can from actual ingredients that are whole foods. Don’t eat “diet” products eat proper whole foods instead. Your body can then control its own wait with just a bit of help from you. On ultra processed foods you need masses of willpower, that’s why people cave in and put the weight back on.

[@kayleighberkana]

Ahhh yes, "Only I am allowed to be a victim, I'm the most victimized of the victims, so worship me only" 🙄🙄🙄

[@radiofiendify]

🎯 your statement is so accurate its scary.

[@westwoodlvr]

@spiderpig1029 go troll somewhere else

[@NotALiberalSoSkipTheScript]

@spiderpig1029Poor victim 😢

[@westwoodlvr]

@spiderpig1029 you’re living in a parallel dimension I suppose

[@westwoodlvr]

@spiderpig1029 of what exactly? women talking about their struggles ≠ victim complex

[@seansweeney3365]

Lizzo has always been forward with who she is. Her style drips with narcissism. Pop artists nowadays have a common theme of “I’m sexy, I’m empowered, I’m right” and somehow we are surprised when they prove it with over the top shitty behavior.

[@famemosterrrrr]

Ohhh yeah as bigger girl myself I never liked they way she was talking about body positivity,some men ect. It was always suspicious

[@snu3877]

It all makes so much sense now that we hear how her dancers have filed suit against her for her sexually aggressive behavior, and ironically talking to them about their weight!@@famemosterrrrr

[@ithink3979]

Lizzo types translated: "I'm mad because 99% of the male population doesn't grow hard when they look at me, so invented a way of trying to make them feel guilty for it which makes me feel better at their expense"

[@buttersstan97]

this is a good point!!!

[@snu3877]

Turns out you CAN'T shame or command people to find you sexy. @@ithink3979

[@xiaoandyoimiyasimp3193]

I am so sad that these people ruined this incredible movement. This movement helped me get through one of the hardest phases of my life. I was and still am a mid size teenager and I was constantly berated and body shamed by my close relatives and volleyball coaches(one of which told me I couldn’t get into the team if I didn’t lose a significant amount of weight). It fed my insecurities so much to the point that I was starting to develop body dysmorphia. I would wake up almost everyday from nightmares that I would eat myself to death and be over 300 pounds. This lead me to start a keto and an omal (I was eating 800 cals a day on average half of which came from avocados) which I continued for two weeks until I started to have blackened vision, dizziness, constant fatigue, mind fog etc. and I realised I was also starting to develop an eating disorder and stopped immediately. I was also doing this whilst I had volleyball practice 7-8 hours a week and additional at home strength and HIT training at home 5-6 days a week. Since then, I quit volleyball (mostly because I wasn’t being taken seriously after performing poorly on an evaluation that happened during the second week of my previous “diet” and it was taking so much of my free time.) which I am not really proud of. I should really get back into doing at home workouts! I discovered I have PCOS and insulin resistance short after that “phase” so that helped me better understand why I was struggling so much to lose any weight. I have tried going on a diet a few times since then but I noticed a pattern that I either one (for the majority of the time), am over restricting and fall back to my usual habits or less commonly, while trying to avoid doing the former I don’t restrict enough. But this gave me the motivation to track my macros and cals again! I even ate some of artichoke and peas my mom made.

[@akaiyoru2681]

Body positivity shouldn't serve ONLY marginalized bodies, it should be there for ALL bodies. You know, for everyone to learn loving themselves not FOR their body but despite how they perceive their body

[@user-is7xs1mr9y]

THIS. Even beautiful people can suffer self image issues. We are all human after all.

[@ladyhella7560]

Yes, as someone who doesn't look older than 16 but is 21, I would love to see more people like me out there to not feel so alone when I try to dress to curves I don't have

[@novepipps]

Especially bc what's deemed as an ideal body always changes. There's a lot of shaming for being skinny now. But in the 2000s skinny was the ideal.

[@akaiyoru2681]

@@user-is7xs1mr9y You might not like your nose, perhaps you notice something that very little people would and even much less would care about. But it still bothers you even if you rationalize it for yourself that nobody really cares. So the only way to get rid of the insecurities is to tackle the issue at it's root, either accept how it looks like or do something about it

[@dontarguewithidiots7459]

VERY well put!!

[@suzykennedy3559]

Body positivity is for ALL bodies, it’s being co-opted by fat liberation/ positivity. If they only want to celebrate their bodies, then have a specialized group instead of co-opting a generalized movement.

[@LifeAfterLosing]

100%

[@Cuddlingus]

liberation means to take away or abolish. fat people want to stay fat, not liberate themselves of their fatness

[@krystaldegannes618]

Exactly

[@derp195]

​@Cuddlingus That's the term they use to describe themselves. And you're assuming they're using the term properly instead of simply using it because it makes them look more persecuted.

[@Cuddlingus]

@@derp195 no I know 😭 they just think they are oppressed and disabled. I was just making fun

[@elizabethmcbride222]

My fat is literally stored trauma. Working through this with therapy and spirituality. Love and light ❤

[@EliasBunda]

I’m on the same path as you! Best of luck! :)

[@okaycola2]

So true

[@snowfall221]

holy shit............ never thought about it that way.

[@fl0pZ3]

i feel the same exact way, we got this ❤️

[@katelijnesommen]

I wish you the best ❤

[@amethystdream8251]

That description of crabs in a bucket was on point. It's an important human lesson to learn if we want solutions to all these problems

[@goofeegoober_]

13:32 - “why would an organism do this to itself?” - as someone who is fighting day and night to heal myself from binge eating, I have never had a more eureka moment than what you said here. Post-binge hangover is real. I literally get the beginning of the flu the next day after a binge.

[@directAction3389]

eureka moment indeed. It's the junk food of course. Excessive sugar messes with your hormones. Bears straight up do it to themselves intentionally by gorging on berries before they hibernate for the winter. Just cut out the junk, and added sugar. The binging goes away all on it's own. I promise you friend. It's like magic except it's actually science really.

[@YutingHong]

part of the reason why my lifestyle change "stuck" contrary to BPM beliefs - I now recognise how absolutely shit I feel after overeating at night like I used to

[@ermik_jackson]

Thank you for writing this! I had a bad binge a few days ago and still haven't healed from the harm it brought on my body 💔 hope I'll really register this and continue on my way to slowly improve my eating habits - glad to know it works!!!

[@goofeegoober_]

@@ermik_jackson you can do this, because you’re self aware, and you realise you don’t want to feel that way. I found using a sobriety tracker app has been instrumental in helping me get my bingeing under control. Small steps. You CAN do this 🥰

[@elemenopi55]

"Enough is as good as a feast."

[@livewellwitheds6885]

i love watching these people try and explain why body positivity ISNT for everybody. if you have a body, its for you.

[@indy_go_blue6048]

I thought reality was for everyone. Apparently not for those in the B-pos cult.

[@johannesswillery7855]

Fat isn't for ANYONE.

[@Hagg-o-tron]

Everyone is born with a body. It's up to you how you treat it. If you stuff it full of crap and it breaks down don't expect any sympathy from me.

[@lfcbpro]

@@user-fm5xf4pe6v nice :P

[@FiestyForce]

​@@Hagg-o-tronsome people of eating disorders, depression, autism, adhd etc. No one wants to stuff themselves with crap

[@oktabramantio4709]

At this point, body positivity feels like a "let's be obese" marketed in a very different way. Let's go sugar industry!

[@ella7719]

Might as well call it fat positivity if all body types aren’t included

[@mau345]

Its always my theory that this is still all driven by consumerism

[@anthnyl]

@@mau345and you would be correct. Its another grift.

[@marie.s9995]

Yup! This Body Positivity Movt equals ==embraced the lifestyle of being sedentary and disconnected from reality!

[@arex9000]

Im not obese but I'm not skinny either. Where am I on the chart.

[@frenchfries2148]

I was a fat little kid, so I started playing sports. I was constantly bullied by family members, my uncle told me he was surprised I could think of anything other than food. Now I’m 21 years old and 170lbs, while he’s almost 40 and close to 350

[@KregoryHaus]

Hey Kiana, I started my weight loss journey at the end of march of this year, I was 370lb. I'm currently 312lb and I just wanted to say your videos help keep me on track with my weight loss. Hearing these cautionary examples help put things into perspective and give me a lot of great reasons to keep making positive choices. I'm nearing the end of my membership to the 300 club and I couldn't be happier.

[@antiarezzo7630]

💪

[@laurenk.6880]

Congratulations on how far you are in your weight loss journey, you’re amazing! ❤️

[@rebeccaspratling2865]

Nice! 🥰 Congratulations. You deserve nothing but the best. 🫂💛

[@MelodyKittyCandy0007]

Wow! Congratulations! Keep going, and keep sharing! Your positive efforts and attitude to keep persisting until the end goal will inspire many others who are unhappy with their weight! You are great!!!!

[@sourdoughsavant22]

Congratulations, I realize you must be putting in a ton of work 🎉 I'm glad you're finding ways to stay accountable and motivate yourself, and I truly hope you reach your target for health! I myself am trying to exercise more, because even though I'm not overweight, I do feel lethargic and get out of breath and have low energy, and its not a good life 😅

[@harshitabhuyan8892]

As a skinny girl who was always bodyshamed in my country, I connected to the body positivity movement thinking it advocates inclusivity for all shapes and sizes. How wrong i was, I soon realised like a slap to my face that when they say body "positivity" they don't just mean positivity for all body types but rather positivity for the positive/plus sized body types because they would preach about how horrible body shaming is and then turn around and happily skinny shame someone else. Now that i see they even body shame their own people i must say it's growing pathetic everyday.

[@draganstankovic2438]

"Body positivity" movement was never about body positivity. It was always just an umbrella for really obese woman to say "hey, it's not my fault, I'm marginalized and it's your fault". It was always just an excuse for fat people to not lose weight and to blame society for the issues that are 100% self-made. People today are taking 0 responsibility for everything but those "body positivity" people are taking negative values, like -100000 responsibility/accountability points.

[@dougefresh8029]

As a skinny guy with a health issue you have no idea bbq family cookout whatever people will say oh your skinny you should get more food could stand to pack on a few pounds. I always wanted to say hey your fat should put some back you could stand to lose a few pounds .

[@Pidalin]

I am also skinny, I am from poor family and I didn't have enough food when I was kid and I have to listen it my entire life that I just skin and bones, but when I say something like "you should walk more" I am toxic. There is a double standard and it's really annoying. Beying from poor family, I am just not used to eat that much as other people, when I see them what they eat, it's totaly shocking for me, like what I have for whole day, they eat just during 30 minutes break in work, it's crazy and then they have serious health problems in their 50s while people like me are still riding bicycles in their 70s or even 80s. Another thing is that they complain about prices of food all the time, yes, when you are used to eat whole pig everyday, it's gonna be pretty expensive with today inflation. I always tought I am super skinny because that's what I have to listen for my entire life because people compare it with themselves and when standard weight for adult male is 120 kg, then I am super skinny compared to them when I have like half of it, but when I go to doctor, they say I am ok because I am small so my weight is fine, so maybe other people are just fat when they call me skin and bones? 😀 This is really annoying and listening that for your whole life really teaches you to hate fat people, which is not good I guess, but it's fault of society that they force me that fatness cult. And I drink coca-cola and going to fastfoods too, I have no problem with that, I don't understand how are people able to eat that much that they have 120+ kg then, that must be really some illness because when I am full, I just can't eat more. Here in Czech Republic, in our culture you have to always finish your meal, your parents and grandparents force you to finish it and our cuisine is just pork and fat, so you can imagne how I was suffering in my childhood when I visited grandparents who were foring me to eat like giant plate of food because I am "too skinny" :-D

[@Mira-gu6we]

I used to be skinny as a girl and a young adult. Now... im fat. I wish i could go back to being skinny. Skinny people get bullied but fat people are treated far, far worse.

[@LieseLotte471]

​@@dougefresh8029I know what you are talking about. I was always always told I needed more weight to look pleasing as a teenager. They lamented I didn't have any boobs. Now I am thirty with a kid and the tune suddenly changed. How are you so slim and fit? How do you not become fat? I still have no boobs and I will likely never have any... But how did it change so quickly once I had a child? Suddenly I am to be admired. People are so so insecure and need to voice every thought they have in real time. It's just sad.

[@jacquolinemartin9612]

See, I look thin.. but I have about 20 lbs of excess skin on my body from major weight loss. It makes me insecure at times, but through a journey of self growth, I’m learning to love myself that much more. According to the direction of where this movement ended up, I’m a traitor for losing weight and my excess skin is nothing more than the grave I dug for myself. Such a shame.

[@rezsurfer2808]

That was your choice. You will be the first one to brag how you did this and say YOU CAN TOO.. thats the issue. You should have accepted yourself as is. They do not want to lose it and just be themselves and not upset how they look. You tell people Loss it. But im sure that will go over your head.

[@carrained]

Your joints and your organs thank you, I'm sure. That's definitely more important than whatever those delusional people think is important.

[@andrewmontague9682]

As an obese man with an eating issue I find the body positive movement horrific.

[@hellou4551]

Good luck on your weightloss journey! I wish you the best of luck

[@seekittycat]

When I was mid 20s I got really sick and lost a bunch of weight. Suddenly my ""body positive"" friend who I thought would cheer me up isn't so nice to me anymore. To her I'm just a "skinny beetch" nevermind that I'm literally sick- not that she even asked. She started thinking everything I do is mean, like I didn't hold the door for her so ""obviously"" I think I'm too good for her now. I didn't really understand body positive movement at the time so I was really hurt and still am.

[@MelodyKittyCandy0007]

Sis, it is ok, we learn from young , there are nasty people like tht who can't be happy for you. So it is said if you hv some improvements in your life, progressed, you unfortunately needed new friends, as some sucks & will not be happy for you. Friends come and go, how? Once u noticed those bad ones, just make a mental note, and don't mix or hang out with those. And make more new ones by being your better self. Celebrate the better you! You need to radiate the energy of, ok if u don't like me, fine. I am chill. It is sad, easier than done, however once u got the mental game, you wldnt feel so down or sad abt it. Enjoy new clothings n yr beauty , ok? Cheers sis

[@foxxxyg]

That sounds a lot like how my party friends started treating me after I got sober.👀

[@MK-hh1vo]

​@foxxxyg That sounds like how my party friends started treating me when I got fat.

[@interrobangings]

​@@foxxxygYou made the right choice. Just had to bury one of my best friends this past weekend. Never really stopped his coke phase. His heart finally gave out. 😞

[@foxxxyg]

@@interrobangings ugh sorry to hear it. I've been to several funerals in the past few years. The closer I get to 30 the more frequent they are. I was the first out of the group I was in, but I wasn't the last! It's nice when someone reaches out to tell me they're clean and whatever they're doing these days.

[@jtallant1977]

I've lost nearly 100 lbs in my health journey - even more if you count the dead weight of my "friends" who bashed me for being fat-phobic because I decided to lose weight.

[@Meg_88]

I'll never understand how wanting to lose weight to be healthy is considered "fat phobic" lol. Fat phobic is when people actively hate on fat folks for no reason, just to be mean and make them feel like garbage with constant bullying. Wanting to lose weight is a health decision, not a phobic one. Good job on losing fat weight AND dead weight, lol.

[@gailalbers1430]

good for you - same her with 50-so far- because it’s very unhealthy to be so over weight.

[@nikoskonstantinidis4069]

your scared of fat people i'm scared of becoming fat we are not the same

[@jtallant1977]

@@nikoskonstantinidis4069 Not sure how you got that from my comment? That's not what I said by any stretch of the imagination, but ok?

[@nikoskonstantinidis4069]

@@jtallant1977 i just wanted to make a little meme, nothing serious. just wanting to light up the mood. good job on reaching your goal and escaping from the negative weight of your past

[@janinegriffiths8281]

When I was younger, and quite skinny, I was shamed for being so thin. Of course, most of them didn't realize that I couldn't gain weight because my severe anxiety and panic attacks made me unable to eat. We don't always have control over how we respond to stress and anxiety in our lives. Same mental distress different physical response.

[@mitacestalia7532]

Honestly, after a bit better from my anxiety disorder, I gain back my lost appetite. Like yeah, I feel you. When I regain back my appetite I am blown up by how good my food taste. Hope you feel better 🙏

[@Gr95dc]

I feel you, whenever I'm stressed my healthy eating habits go out the window, I start skipping meals and stuff. Is not cute and I never feel good about myself on those moments, I feel exhausted and sad :(

[@TheSplinter]

35M here. Got sucked in by "Body positivity" Always had an unhealthy relationship with food and it spun out of control. Ballooned up to 360lbs before I realized I was slowly killing myself. Decided to make a change and I'm down to 298 in less than a year, have started to pay more attention to what I'm eating and how much. On top of that, I've taken up Powerlifting and even though I'm always sore and stiff from training, I can unequivocally say; I feel significantly better on my worst days in my current situation than I did on my best days at 360. Body positivity has a place in society as you've rightfully called out. However, too many people "Body positivity" as an excuse to overeat and make no changes. Granted some folks legitimately have metabolic issues that prevent weight loss or make it much harder. But most of us, no excuses

[@blerst7066]

No one should be forced to be as skinny as a K-pop star, but no one should be pressured into gaining weight either.

[@saskiafinnan4216]

i agree society shouldn't pressure anyone into gaining weight, but those who love you should be able to say something if you have lost a lot of weight in an unhealthy way or gained a lot of weight quickly.

[@samiaario8291]

These people are actually pressuring others to NOT LOSE WEIGHT. 🤦

[@ishathakor]

@@saskiafinnan4216 yes, and it should be limited to people who are close to you who actually know what's going on with you. or doctors. not randos

[@cierabruns7271]

As a "mid-sized" body I can relate to feeling lost until more and more people were making videos about styling for my body type and where to find items that actually fit. Lifted my confidence to the max.

[@pathofthetrickster]

Same. Its like clothes aren't designed for us. Either too small and tight in some areas and baggy in others. I feel frumpy in most outfits

[@Ryan-wx1bi]

Ive noticed that most movements these days are toxic. A lot of people seem to cling to some type of movement and use it to feed their superiority complex. It makes them feel/think they are better than others

[@lainiwakura1776]

Because they're replacements for religions and turn into cults.

[@BereniceMadara]

This

[@secretspy44]

I have a hypothesis that as many people leave religious practice they're looking for new ways to justify being judgemental, pious and superior. Its like keeping one of the worst/self-gratifying parts about organized religion but with way less personal responsibility, guilt, charity and commandments. Kinda explains to me why so many social movement groups are so culty. Gotta be PURE body positivity. A true believer. Just better than everyone else.

[@gelflingfay]

Because the mindsets of the people in them are different. Most people lack critical thinking these days. Lizzo is stupid. Body Positivity moment is for all body types. The FAT Positivity movement is specific types. I don't understand why they find it so hard to understand.

[@gelflingfay]

​@secretspy44 because honestly, people need something to believe in and crave society acceptance. It is ingrained in us. It is human. To give us something greater than ourselves to believe in and strive for.

[@OpossumOnTheMoon]

I have very visible scars on my arms from SH and scars on my face after being attacked by a dog. Having family constantly point them out or strangers coming up to me and asking me invasive questions (basically asking if I cut myself) has made me very self conscious. I’ve also had my facial scaring since elementary school so I’ve grown up with people focusing on them. But I wouldn’t be allowed in the bopo movement by these people because I’m skinny.

[@Wulfenburg]

Just in the past year I've read of 3 different fat acceptance activists leaders have died from heart issues. It's absolutely insane. I can only imagine how their followers feel, like it must be awkward right?

[@djm5687]

Many people in the "fat acceptance" movement are actually *fat fetishist.* There’s a difference between accepting that a person has a (food) addiction, and _encouraging and praising_ that addiction.

[@borkguy]

The thing about having a hardcore belief as your world view, you gotta twist facts and reality to fit that belief or it all falls apart.

[@thichinhphan4010]

I hope they keep following their leaders... to the grave. Some people can't learn a lesson until reality hits them.

[@djm5687]

@thichinhphan4010 The reaction will be: "We need to do more to protect the lives of 'opressed' fat people!" Just like how "trans" children have mental illness & death later in life because hormones & surgery doesn't always help the underlying mental issues.

[@vanivari359]

That's not how death cults work. There are a million stupid ways around facing reality. Those people already proved how delusional they are. People like Tess are horrible people, they are like a long term smoker telling everybody that smoking is OBVIOUSLY healthy because they don't have cancer yet. The only positive about this specific branch of the movement is that it kinda solves itself very fast and at increasing speed.

[@holdmacat9932]

Yessss! Im a medium size as I struggle with binge eating all my life, and the amount of underrepresentation is tragic! There are thin people or obese people, no in-between it seems everywhere. It hurts me, cause it makes me struggle with body dysmorphia even more as I see no one like me anywhere. People saying mid size people are thin is just gross! Im nowhere thin, people call me fat too. And there isn't such thing as being overweight then?

[@Ivory81]

While I can’t really relate to you, I certainly sympathise. I’ve always thought the grouping of every type of plus sized body into one category was vastly underrepresenting people who fell in the middle ground of not being especially thin or extremely overweight. It’s a very strange phenomenon for sure

[@LifeAfterLosing]

I feel that way too! I’m pretty muscular but people assume I’m fat because I’m still big after losing 190 pounds. My body fat is low, I’m just wide! 😂

[@sophieclinnick95]

Yes I’m medium size too I get this post!

[@momokunn]

Totally relate! It's like you're too fat to be skinny, but too skinny to be "fat" 😅😅 feels like mid child syndrome

[@blammela]

I’ve often said “I’m too thin to be a fetish but too fat to be attractive”. We are the forgotten generation of body sizes lol

[@capitalstitchco]

Oh my god I had forgotten about that poor man who was dancing and now I'm tearing up. So glad he got his own party.

[@JelenaXemira]

Me too omg this shattered my world all over again😭

[@procrastinaster4553]

Thank you so much. I haven’t finished the video yet, but as someone who has struggled their whole life with food and weight, after losing a lot of weight (due to depression) I felt like I wasn’t connected with my body anymore even tho I was constantly getting compliments on my weight loss. (This was especially triggering bc it felt like I was being praised for being thinner despite it coming at the cost of my own mental health.) body positivity should be for everyone. We don’t know what people are dealing with; why not just be kind?

[@sicksadgrls]

Ugh, this is so important!!!! I am recovering from binge eating disorder right now and the amount of people who told me “you need to eat to survive” (it came from a good place but still) it helped keep me delusional. My problem only got worse. I couldn’t stop until I got put onto medications to help suppress appetite/overeating. Thank u for making this video. It’s so important.

[@rachel4325]

yeah same!! struggling with binge eating as a fatty and watching an abbey sharpe vid... did not do well for me

[@plaster.art.ho3]

Yeah me back then... And my cousin who's 150cm and gained sooo much weight cause she would binge eat.. She said she didn't want to be ard friends who would look at her differently if she had the 4th or 5th plate, she said she doesn't want to stop at just the 2nd or 3rd plate cause even then she felt judged and that's why she prefers being ard family. But im like???? Your friends want the best for you and they wanna keep being ard u because they like u so of course they don't wanna see u eating ureself to death like???

[@Llallume]

Look... I was so deep in this movement, it still scares me to think about and I had to practically abandon parts of my life to escape it. I used to weigh 450 pounds (204 kg) and nearly died because my weight, according to me, wasn't a health factor. Fat activism, as it is now, assumes the worst of others who are smaller than them. They are terrified of being hurt and bullied and lash out the moment they think they might be, and, like me going into high school, look for other fat girls because they feel safe in that company. Girls that they consider thin, like a size 16? That's skinny. That's dangerous. I lost 230 pounds (104 kg) because if I didn't, I'd die. My heart was failing at 29 years old. I still have hypothyroidism. I still have PCOS. And I am so much less confident than I ever was in a fat body. But I'm not lashing out at others, assuming they hate me because I'm still 200+ pounds or because I have a lot of loose skin. I see this movement and I feel the vestigial anger and fear in me. Man, it's sad.

[@Anon-tt9rz]

the saddest part is that alot of those people will die while being lulled into this lunacy, waste of human life.

[@KrillWhisperer]

I bow to you for translating this to kg

[@seashellgarden2227]

Wow, I am so glad you made it out. You're on your way to healing, and you'll be able to become confident again one day. For now, I'm just glad you made it out of the hole you were in :)

[@throughcolouredglasses9300]

That's really impressive and i hope one day you get to live peacefully and confidently in your body, as you deserve to.

[@claudiolancia319]

Hey, I just wanted to say that the fact you managed to return to a healthy level of weight is impressive and I am happy for you! If I can be honest with you, every visible change in your body is difficult to accept, so it’s normal to feel less confident, but I can say that for every fat person that hyped you up and made you feel confident in your fat body, there are as many if not more people that will accept you as your body is now, and will also be impressed by your choice to become healthier and look up to you for it. Just because your health is at risk doesn’t make it any easier to choose to lose weight: many people decide to simply label doctors as fatphobic and continue eating until they die of heart failure at 40. So I’ll say that you have come far and it *does* matter. Your health is important, and I mean also your mental health. If you continue feeling less confident or worse, I suggest you look for a therapist, they can be a giant helping hand. I hope this message helps you even if just a little ☺️

[@Kennephone]

As a man who used to bed 300lbs, but is now 190, I can say that I have body image issues, mostly from the loose skin that I have, and the constant fear that I've gained more weight. I still see myself as fat, even though I'm not. I always see other people my age (early 20s), and I see how skinny they are, and I get super jealous, even though it's just cause they have a smaller frame, and it makes me feel like I'm fat.

[@billmartins5545]

Find clothes that make you look and feel your best. Finding the right size and cut, and the right style and colours can make a big difference.

[@Ralizah]

As a man who is older and has been even fatter than you were, I can say that a lifetime of feeling gross and unattractive doesn't immediately go away when you lose weight. Those insecurities are baked into your mind, tempered by years and years of self-loathing. With that said, you can do things to help, like building muscle and wearing nice clothes. And while loose skin doesn't look great on its own, I think of it sort of like someone whose body was scarred in conflict. While not conventionally attractive, it's still something to be proud of: it's proof that you have the willpower and courage to change your life for the better. If possible, adopt meditation practices to help control your own negative thoughts and also consider going to therapy. You lost so much weight, which can be incredibly hard, and you deserve to enjoy and feel proud of the body you inhabit.

[@Llallume]

Same. I have loose skin too and feel super insecure about it. Finding pants sucks and, (I'm a substitute teacher) my students (innocently) ask what's in my pockets to make my lower half look so large. It's just my loose skin and I do my best to explain it to them. They have always been supportive and kind, but it still makes me wince internally. I've never, in my adult life, had a normal body... and, even if I had surgery, I don't know if I'll ever feel like I have one.

[@jamieb2601]

I think body positivity should be like this: Every body is beautiful, and if you want to change it, that’s your choice! We will all support every body, whether you’re thin or thick, disabled or not, we love and accept all bodies

[@Orkeanos]

I disagree. Well not every body is beautiful though. There are ugly people. Let’s not pretend that beauty is a completely subjective aspect. It is to a large degree objective and even measurable. And that’s already conceded, because other wise there would be no ‚beaut standard‘. And the claim that the beauty standard just exists because of cultural norms is just that: A claim without proof. I think the message should be: Everyone should be treated with respect and nobody should be discriminated against because of his her appearance.

[@darkraven5424]

​The literal definition of a beauty standard is: the societal ideals and expectations regarding physical appearance, particularly in relation to attractiveness and desirability. And yes, it is completely based on culture, which is proved by the fact that the standard changes between countries. Example- Asian countries typically prefer skinny, pale, double eyelid, etc. But, if you look at African beauty standards are dark skin, unique hairstyles, etc. Asian countries prefer prefer people conform, while African countries like people to stand out. If the standard wasn't based on culture, then the standard would stay the same between countries. Not only that, but the standards have changed drastically over time. It used to be that fatter meant more beautiful and more desirable since it meant you were wealthy. Then it changed to extreme skinniness was deemed desirable. The concept of is beauty subjective or objective has been a debate with no clear winner. Both sides have some solid arguments, but neither side has come to a cohesive agreement on what beauty is. There are literally entire philosophical sub-communities that have argued about this all the way back to Socrates. You chose to ignore all of the evidence to one side of this argument, that doesnt mean it's a 'claim without proof', it just means you ignored it.

[@DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro]

@@darkraven5424 no, he’s right. Beauty has elements of subjectivity and taste, but a beautiful thing is a beautiful thing, and an ugly thing is an ugly thing. People could argue all day and night about what the prettiest flower is, but not a single person present would interject to tell everyone that no, flowers are in fact ugly, and it’s turds that are pretty. What you’re seeing in differences of beauty standards isn’t a redefining of beauty itself, just different peoples’ preferences of already beautiful people. Generally speaking, a healthy person is at least considered average looking, at best beautiful, depending on his or her own individual features. That is where the preference lies. But the hunchback of Notre Dame isn’t anyone’s ideal beauty standard. Characteristics seen on healthy people will come into and fall out of fashion, but the hallmarks of an unhealthy one never will. What is more important in all of this is the ability to recognize that beauty does not equal worth. Society the world over is full of immature people who equate the two, demonstrating a severely shallow sense of value for human life. Do not do this. A beautiful person is not a better person. A beautiful person is not a more worthy person. A beautiful person has the same innate value as an ugly person, or as a plain person. The only thing of true value there is the person. Beauty should only be that important to you when it comes to your own personal relationship with someone special, someone who will always find you beautiful because you’re you. That is the only person you should be trying to impress, because he or she has already proven that you and your well-being matter most. Who cares what Sandra down the street thinks of your complexion? Do you even like Sandra? Does Sandra even like you? Who cares if Sandra likes daisies more than roses, that’s her prerogative.

[@darkraven5424]

@DannyDevitoOffical-TrustMeBro I love the irony of you not realizing the pure amount of tomes you mentioned "subjectivity", "preferance", etc and still don't understand that you are quite literally proving the point. Beauty is subjective. People have different preferences. Everyone has inherent beauty and value. The concept you support is the same concept that people use to justify mistreating people based on how they look. You can't say that all people are equal value, but these ones particularly are just awful to look at. You see why that doesn't work? Point blank, beauty is complicated. That's why there's an entire philosophy extending over decades just about it. And I'm really tired of people trying to simplify it down. Also, will point out, history disagrees with the concept that only healthy traits have been seen as beautiful. Let's not forget, it used to be the larger you are, the prettier. And lastly. I think you're missing the point. Fat people don't expect everyone to find them beautiful. They're not worried about Sandra. They just don't want people to shout at them and insult them. Because that's a common experience, most people who are oversized go through.

[@katieporter2827]

This literally is what body positivity is lmfao.

[@Alexhandre13]

As a dude that lost 100lbs in his mid 20s I remember finding this 'body positivity' stuff back then and quickly realizing that it definitely didn't apply to men. lol It was basically: "Don't even get your hopes up, do the work or you're f*cked." and I did. 🤣

[@Mister_Clean]

When I was a 6'1" 130 pound guy hitting the gym to fix my body, some random gymbros gave me an entire routine and diet plan. They're now my best friends and I've put on 50 pounds of lean muscle. I don't think I've ever heard a similar story from women

[@samuellindsell3967]

Kiana is a human diss track. Just spitting straight facts constantly

[@jenny-ng2ol]

As a woman with broad shoulders and small hips, I've always struggled with feeling too manly. I'ts disappointed me for years that a movement literally called body positive only focused on weight and ignored other groups like me who are skinny but feel unwanted by society's standard. It's always been an added layer of frustration that I can literally do nothing to change my bodys shape and yet im still not accepted into a body pos movement because im "skinny"

[@Bailey44-g6m]

Yes feel you. Got the same problem 😢

[@celinemara565]

Cause the movement is not about your insecurities… yall need to get that through your heads lmao. Its about systemic oppressions that plus sized people face such as doctors constantly dismissing plus sized people

[@tigaliyt]

I'm your opposite! Enby and transmasc but with those big-ass thighs, butt and hips (well; compared to the rest of my body). Sometimes I'm okay with them, sometimes it drives me up the fucking wall. Imagine if we could swap ^^'

[@TheRealJellyBomb]

I need your phone number 😂 💕

[@eileenms8559]

I feel like this was also happening a lot to plus size women with the apple shaped body. Everywhere you saw plus sized models they had this perfect hourglass figure that carried fat really well.

[@strong60s]

Aren't there more worthy "movements" to focus on? ie. education for all, food for all, work opportunities for all, healthcare access for all...

[@izzy-dz8vr]

The fact that there's a label called "death fat" is terrifying

[@isihosena635]

Guess what morbidly obese means....

[@AtBurgerKingWithMyBurgerQueen]

And they’re embracing it… this whole thing is insanity

[@annmarieknapp]

Geeze, never heard of that.

[@Jenleahhh]

Imagine if an anorexic body positive group had “death thin”

[@hoosierbaddy3052]

It’s scary bc it’s brutally honest. And most folks are in death denial. So, they avoid the word death. We even euphemistically say stuff like, ‘he didn’t make it’ to indicate death. ‘He passed away’. ‘He’s in a better place’. ‘He’s at rest’. ‘They lost their life’. ‘They lost the battle’. Lots of loss. And the medical community calls death a ‘negative patient outcome’. How euphemistic is that!? I enjoy the more creative ways to say death. Pushing daisies. The big dirt nap. Kicking the bucket. The British say, ‘he popped his clogs’. Death for everything is an inevitability of living here. It’s interesting to me to watch people hang onto life here. Anti aging crap sold everywhere, plastic surgery and a youth obsessed culture create death denial. Do you believe wholeheartedly that you’ll be alive tomorrow? You’re in death denial. NO ONE is guaranteed a life beyond the moment. Joy can only be felt in the moment, so get there and stay there!

[@jadinealma7742]

I spent many years at size 8 and was told I was fat by numerous men and women... I also had a lot of body image issues. For people to discount my experience just because I wasn't obese is really ignorant tbh

[@s.ewasiuk7715]

I am too a size 8 and have been told I have a fat ass, so there you go

[@debblouin]

How tall are you?

[@s.ewasiuk7715]

@@debblouin 5' 8"

[@im_bobby_mom]

Body positivity was also a big componenet in helping people who had been disfigured due to accidents accept themselves. It was never just about bigger bodies to begin with 🙄

[@smarti1809]

Unfortunately the movement was co-opted by insecure fat people. I credit the movement to improving views on scars and vitiligo, but the fat nutters in this group think it's only about them

[@secretlyadragon4723]

I remember following a movement when I was younger called 'Healthy Is The New Skinny'. It was also very body positive and emphasized focusing on health first over being a particular size. I felt as if a lot of heavier girls couldn't get with it because of that (from comments I read). They felt as if the movement was trying to highjack their sometimes very unhealthy lifestyle and turn them 'skinny' in an undercover way. However, it wasn't about being skinny, it just empahsized focusing on your health first and whatever size you fell on naturally (skinny or not) should be acceptable to yourself and to society. It was a lot more body positive than the so-called body positive movement. Sometimes I wonder what happened to it.

[@nopusnopius]

When I discovered the body positivity novement, it was in its early stages. Thanks to it, I wore a crop top for the first time, I felt encouraged to get help for my EDNOS, and I started muscle training. It really could've been something big, something great; and I feel so sad whenever I see what it has become nowadays. Back when I discovered it, there was content that was truly uplifting and educating, but now it's a warzone, and whoever is more "marginalized" is the designated winner.

[@1904Aparna]

I've always been extremely skinny (BMI

[@maryamdiao1509]

Wow screw them

[@maryamdiao1509]

You can never win with them just stay healthy love

[@shandnaburroughs1407]

I am a plus size individual. I was told I am not fat enough to have a valid take on body positivity and was told I was fatphobic for deciding and moving forward with losing weight.🙄

[@TheKrispyfort]

I'm positive that you are allowed to move to a weight that helps you feel more capable within yourself and enjoy your life

[@mck1972]

The fool that told you those things proves just how toxic this, ' movement ', really are. Do your best-For yourself. That is good enough.

[@djm5687]

Following the "fatphobic for deciding and moving forward with losing weight" is like telling a person who quit drugs that they "hate drug addicts".

[@Jeevitham15011]

Bro people are messed up! "Not fat *enough*???" ☠☠

[@shandnaburroughs1407]

Just to put a few things into context. At my heaviest, I was 233.5lbs. Not as big as you can be but big enough. As long as you feed (no pun intended) into the echo chamber of you are beautiful and healthy as a fat person, you were embraced by fat positive people. Now! Because I was a 'small fat' (yes... that is a thing) ... I was told I was not oppressed enough thus had no room to speak in 'fat safe spaces'. I did not need as many accommodations... I could still find cute clothes in my size to fit into... no one would really target me for bullying. I was never a part of the fat acceptance movement. I just made the mistake in assuming that I would be accepted and understood in a 'fat safe space'. I believed I could share my concerns and insecurities with someone who was fat like me. I disclosed to these people that at my heaviest size... I was having complications and just wanted to know was I alone. At my heaviest, walking a block or climbing a small flight of stairs left me winded... my thighs rubbed together and chafed... my back and joints was hurting... my poor diet only left me feeling increasingly worse... my doctor told me I was prediabetic not too long ago. I expressed interest toward losing weight because of these health issues in a 'fat safe space'. Big mistake! I was told I was fatphobic for thinking about wanting to lose weight despite me telling these people of my medical issues and concerns. I was told obesity was not a disease. I was told that my doctor was lying about my prediabetic prognosis, and I needed to stop seeing my current doctor to find one who was not fatphobic. They insisted that my current doctor was trying to scare me into embracing diet culture. No one addressed the other issues I was having for whatever reason. Long story short... I am longer associating with those people and is moving toward losing weight. I lost 10lbs already, I am already feeling better and is hoping to lose more. I have no interest in looking back. Do not bother reasoning with those people... just keeping it moving.

[@loganrogge]

People think intuitive eating means eating whatever you want whenever you want. Its more of a skill that requires knowledge of nutrition and portion sizes, along with practice recognizing hunger and satiation cues. Its not something you can just do automatically if you already have issues with unhealthy habits, whether that is over or under eating.

[@Arin-3]

I knew some people who used to participate in the "movement". Everything was fine with me and them when i was 240 lbs {105-110 kgs}. It all went downhill when I lost 100 lbs {40-50 kg} and all the "positivity" went to utter shit. Aparently I was "Genetically blessed" with the willpower to change it.( mfw i was manic for 1 month and almost starved myself to death).

[@noxthemc7717]

Ah, the joys of bipolar disorder. "Did you even eat or sleep yesterday?" "It's okay. I got a good 2 hrs. And I had an apple."

[@RikisVlogs]

ALWAYS A GOOD DAY WHEN KIANA UPLOADS!! I could never really be involved in BP communities, it never really tackled what was really happening in my brain. I never want to go back and being almost 300 pounds and not being able to move. I found a fitness community where my body is accepted and we aren’t shamming others for our lack off.

[@itsnotif.itswhen]

You know what I don’t get. Overweight people who tend to blame on being poor, but willing to pay $80-100 for getting their nails done every 2-3 weeks. With that money, you definitely could afford weekly healthy groceries

[@mattm4437]

"Body Positivity" helped me feel more comfortable in my own skin while i SIMULTANEOUSLY took better care of my health. In my case: lifting weights and eating a little better. Ive realized over the years too much of the movement shifts into zero-accountability and, very ironically, a lot of gatekeeping and negative world views. I'm no paradigm of health (look, I still really like pizza ok?) but im proud of what I did and continue to do. Occasional body dysmorphia be damned, I'm the healthiest ive ever been in my adult life according to my doctor and I feel a whole lot better than I did

[@guaranteedtopwn]

Having pizza (sometimes :D) and it making you happy is healthier than constant deprivation of what you want! Truly

[@slavbarbie]

​​@@FuckEntropy kind grammar police 🤩 vocabulary police to be precise but ok

[@slavbarbie]

Weightlifting is everything!!! ❤

[@katelijnesommen]

Yes, it's so odd that body positivity has become synonymous with "not wanting your body to change ever"; you can be positive about your body and believe it has value while still having health or even (gasp) aesthetic goals. The pure concept of body positivity has helped me to be grateful for everything my body does and value it outside of how it looks, but I'm still trying to get fitter and those two things aren't mutually exclusive to me.

[@janisir4529]

Pizza is healthy. At least the good quality kind. I recently tried Don Pepe, and felt sick after half a pizza... I really need to find a good pizzeria.

[@VioletEnds]

I'm really glad I never fell into the body positivity or HAES oriented movements. I was 400 pounds at my highest and it was definitely not okay. I felt like shit all the time. I'm 215 pounds down and have been maintaining a healthy weight for over a year now, and I had my first skin removal surgery 6-weeks ago. I had about 10 pounds of skin removed, most of it from my belly, and it feels so good not having that weight on me anymore

[@Lozie82]

Happy for you

[@stxlaxPP]

Well done!

[@justnana13-klj40]

Congrats!🎉

[@Jess38044]

Amazing work, well done :D

[@Georgie_blue]

For 10 + years I had severe Psoriasis covering my whole body and face - I was an Australian size 8 (US size 4). I consistently got teased, rejected and humiliated for my skin condition and felt very depressed. I was really happy to see the body positivity movement emerge during this time as I saw bodies with skin conditions represented which made me feel less alone. It really upsets me that people of smaller figures are being hate kept out of the body positivity community under the assumption that they don’t need support because they’re thin - regardless of if they have any other issues such as skin conditions, burns, physically handicaps, ED’s, body dysmorphia etc etc. Body positivity should be applicable to all bodies period.

[@elaowczarczyk7143]

So I’m mid sized who struggled with eating disorders and body dysmorphia for over 10 years and I cannot participate in body positivity cause I’m apparently “skinny” and can’t have any problems?

[@smokywreck]

I knew a teacher of mine who was fat not by choice but due to a medical condition. She took pills, ate healthy and barely, and she was active. Always out taking walk, the only teacher outside of those actually physically fit or jsut playful by nature that would actively take part on sport class with students. She was super kind and only ever took something unhealthy when we had special event. Even so, she avoided eating pizza and mostly brought her own lunch anyway. Her weight was constantly used to insult her and it just wasn't fair in my opinion. It's been maybe 9-10 years since I last seen her. She was such a great soul. And I deeply wish her the best. She was apart of the group that helped me stop hurting myself, helped me along the way to regulate my emotions.

[@Ραφα-π1ζ]

I had a friend who was always a little curvier but rapidly gained weight in a short amount of time, crossing over from curvy to obese. The ironic thing is she brings up her weight more than anyone else does, going on tangents about how amazing intuitive eating is and rants left and right about body positivity. All that energy and frustration she puts into this defensive mindset could be used to actually work out and eat right instead....she's clearly unhappy with her body but doesn't do anything about it.

[@spOOkytimes]

Unfortunately, they are looking for external validation when that's a super unhealthy way to find self esteem and confindence. You have to be okay with yourself which generally leads to taking care of yourself.

[@kamiiu]

it's sad

[@kierahuskarl]

Enablers, all of them. It took losing weight to find out-- and it was honestly only 35 pounds-- but I felt so much better it made me address emotional eating and take my mental health more seriously.

[@LeoneLaTwerk2]

Every lil bit really does count no matter what and can make all the difference. Cutting refined sugars completely is a bitch and a half. (Was my issue) but I do notice I feel better energy level-wis eand not as sour stomached when i wake up.

[@RainbowdashLT]

Man, remember the times when body positivity about people who like lost limbs, got horrific injuries that deformed them and they were often stared at or made fun of by another grown adults.

[@Cathmoytura]

I first heard the term "fatphobia" by a woman claiming that my enjoyment of and passion for cycling, mountain biking, hiking, and kayaking was fatphobia. Something about active middle-aged men are solely motivated by a fear of fat, not because we still enjoy doing things. I don't know if she considered herself part of the body positivity movement, but from what I've learned since a lot of her language was consistent with it.

[@loiracitr]

OMG! I love to read, I never realised this is dyslexia-phobic!

[@Cathmoytura]

@@loiracitr In hindsight, wish I retorted that she was being ageist.

[@loiracitr]

@@Cathmoytura next time!!

[@maloumasereel966]

Lol that’s grand 🙃 Did you ask her if she was fit phobic?

[@Cathmoytura]

@@maloumasereel966 I sat there stupidly arguing I know lots of middle-aged people who enjoy different sports and activities. I should have loudly accused her of ageism, but it didn't occur to me at the time. I'm autistic, so I could have thrown in "ableist" while I was at it.

[@WobblesandBean]

3:10 Yes, Lizzo, the body positivity movement was indeed meant for EVERY BODY. Not just fat ones. YOU'RE the ones who co-opted it, not the other way around!

[@yerfavpsycho]

You can't co-opt a group that's made for everyone. It's the blame game that's ruining the movement.

[@LifeAfterLosing]

Exactly!

[@cristalleslie6311]

Kinda how I feel about white people co opting the word woke. We have been using that term for years now I never want to hear it again.

[@easolinas1233]

@@yerfavpsycho You can co-opt a movement if it was meant for everyone, and you force it to only be about you.

[@Vanvanroo]

I'm super thin, like unhealthily so. And I used to hate myself for it. I've always tried super hard to gain weight and look "normal" and it just made me feel so bad when I just couldn't (high metabolism, among other things). And being called creepy, skeleton, corpse, etc... hurt a lot too. I thought for a while that the body positivity movement was made for me. But soon enough after looking online it felt like it was just made for fat people. I felt like I didn't belong there either. It hurt too because of how so many of them would actively shame girls who looked thin, calling them all sorts of names similar to what I was called all my life, and that shit just hurt even more. It's like they don't realise they're going against their own principles. How are you supposed to make people feel loved and included when you're so hateful against them???

[@Pink_pr1ncess]

I’m so sorry sweetie and I totally relate to you. I used to be underweight and was called anorexic my entire childhood, I managed to put on a few pounds but I’m still insecure about my body because I don’t feel “womanly” all the time and I’m not super curvy like most girls my age (I’m 18). Body positivity is toxic and exclusive to us smaller girls who also struggle with body image issues

[@SabrinaBelladonna]

I was born naturally skinny too and yes, the comments that I recieved, not only from strangers but also family members, during the first few decades of my life because of my body type were unbelievable and often insulting. I could have eaten to the point where I would literally throw up, but not gain any weight regardlessly. Weight training was what made me look (and feel) more healthy; these days I get remarks about me being too muscular, but when considering the type of people who come with these remarks, then I take them all as a complement; because unlike them, then I am doing something right and constantly improving myself.

[@Icewing10]

Too many narcissists on the web.

[@mimharahman3742]

Hi Kiana Your videos helped me address my binge eating behaviour. Went to a therapist and dietician Hopefully I will be able to live well and healthy❤

[@WobblesandBean]

I'm proud of you! The first step is always the hardest.

[@KianaDocherty]

Wow I'm so happy to hear that! Congrats on getting help!

[@peterpupe8352]

Keep it up. I started walking/running and can really recommend it. Im 120kg(265lbs) right now at 193cm. I found tracking progress with my running a little more substantial and motivating than tracking weight. You should start with walking when youre quite heavy, as small injuries are very common if youre not careful. Look up tips for prevention (uphill better for joints...)

[@heatherjohnson955]

“Everyone struggled with body image issues.” You nailed it. As a petite person whose struggled with eating disorders my entire life, I can say people definitely can’t judge a book by the cover. Until I had to get treatment or die my best friends didn’t know the extent of my body shame and pain.

[@Jenifer_R_]

As a skinny girl, I felt we were thrown under the bus in order to make fat girls feel better about themselves. The worst part was the righteous indignation that calling me disgusting was helping society.

[@tracychavez4077]

umm. the same can be said about the diet culture.

[@Jenifer_R_]

@@tracychavez4077 Yes. Many of these diets are flat out dangerous. But skinny girls get the blame.

[@samanthaspiezio4687]

People are always going on about how skinny people or people on a diet are perpetuating and funding the diet industry, but they dont have a problem with obesity doing the same thing with the fast food industry?

[@caravanlifenz]

Burger chains had a lot to do with the fat girl positivity movement. In the early 2000s, sandwich chains like Subway and other healthier chains started to eat into McDonald's customer base. Then suddenly everyone was talking about fat acceptance and it's okay to be fat, right when McDonald's was losing its market share. Not a coincidence. Fat girls were being used by those chains.

[@Castigar48]

​@tracychavez4077 the dieting industry is worth 160 billion$, the fast food industry is worth 650 billion...which is worse?

[@kamalionify]

Im over 250pounds and everything hurts. I feel sick a lot. My skin hurts. I struggle to stand some days. I cant even imagine someone psychologically 'sane' to actually encourage others to fatten up for the movement. You cant be sane AND encourage others to eat more when their health is on the line

[@SandraSine40]

My friend sells underwear and bras, she herself is fit, but her mom and most of our friend group is bigger girls and understands our struggles, and she helped us ger bras many times, no problems no judgment.... And then just yestrday when she had a young obese girl shopping she noticed the girl is picking way too small bras and it looked uncomfortable when she suggested bigger size girl ignored her and bought the small one, claiming she knows her size... And then a few mins letter in comes equally big mother complaining that my friend made her daughter cry and she asked where she can put a formal complaint, like fitting a correct size was some kind of insult towards girls size, fucking hell...

[@dawnsalois]

mother in denial so the daughter follows suite.

[@Jonitherat172]

After losing 40kg I can confirm that I feel so much more healthy no more hurting feets or knees just after a little bit of walking, also breathing so much more easy

[@BurnyBits]

Wasn't Body Positivy actually co-opted by Fat Activists in the first place? If I remember correctly, it was originally created for people who lost limbs, had scarring, etc. to remind them that they were beautiful. It wasn't originally supposed to be an exclusive club of morbidly obese women to point and judge...oh and be victims of course.

[@patriciacrawford6435]

I'm old as dirt with a BMI of 25. Where I live, I'm considered a "small." I wear a 12 - 14.