Kids in the Hall - S03E08 - Freedom of Speech ("You use the word 'ascertain' too much.")

[@pringlescan81]

“Good morning fellas! Hand me that thing. Boy, this works hard! Guys, break’s over.” Words to live by.

[@Maphisto86]

“Well done. 👍 You could make vice-president some day. Now get the hell out of my office!“ 😂

[@SixxThirtyFive]

Decades later every time I hear the word ascertain I recall this sketch and giggle like a 7 yr old internally.

[@lorenmorgan1931]

Everytime I write an email with ascertain or delineate in it, I laugh as well. Good Stuff!

[@ChloeKestermont]

SAME

[@dauntae24]

Same. Also the phrase “I had the pear dream again”.

[@LEOhopeful]

"Ascertain" and "delineate" have been in my head with this sketch for 30 years. In here now to send this video to my boss (I now work on a loading dock also lol)

[@EvilPettingZoo]

I laugh out loud. Then I wait for "delineate ". My hopes are never realized.

[@douglasphillips5870]

"Whatever you do in the privacy of your home with your good lady wife is your business" is the line that always got me.

[@cynthia.marina]

I don't understand much that bit, I still lagh whenever I see this skit though

[@Uriel238]

This is where I learned _delineate._ Right here. This skit. My life has never been the same.

[@TamaraKane]

"A boy gets to be a man when a man is needed." - Flight

[@johansmallberries9874]

Everybody remembers ascertain and delineate from this, but for me it’s always “comprende.. vous?”

[@crashburn3292]

k?

[@PS-nf3xw]

I see you are a man of taste

[@swishfish8858]

For me it's always "Nooo, it's not *Sanchez!!!"*

[@kit2770]

"No, it's the fact that you use the word 'ascertain' too much." Lol. This sketch is so damn good. So, so good.

[@BettinaBalser]

I will forever be madly in love with Bruce McCulloch. My husband knows this, and approves.

[@loonatticat]

EeeeeRadicatorrr!!!!

[@sstaners1234]

I ascertain you have good taste in men.

[@thedavesiknow4598]

Me too!

[@drgrl]

I can live with that...

[@kathleenpatricia3794]

Bruce is a cutie 💯!

[@jonesey251]

I've wanted to do this with several people through the years over the word "Literally"

[@CoopDVille-rx3hp]

Oh,you mean how people like to use it to add extra emphasis to something, as though that has EVER been the way that it was intended to be used!? Cuz I definitely don't know anyone who does THAT.

[@tsuobachi]

I ascertain that you're delineating a scenario in which many of us literally find ourselves.

[@CoopDVille-rx3hp]

@@tsuobachi HAHAHAHA!!!😂 Best damn reply I've ever gotten,no question! But of course I would literally be forever grateful....okay,maybe not literally FOREVER.....if you would delineate these wild ascertainations. .....my spell-check did not care for that last word. Clearly it's never seen this sketch.

[@joefelice5062]

Or people who say “like” as a space filler in conversation, and also use the word “like” in their analogies in the same conversation, so they say “like” more than twice in any given sentence.

[@CoopDVille-rx3hp]

@@joefelice5062 I've got to be honest; I do that all the time. And for the exact reason you said,of course. As a total grammer nazi,I'm aware that it's not the best look,but it is a very deeply ingrained habit at this point. I've found that most of the time it's either "like" or "uuhhh...uummm..." It's one of many reasons why I work much better with the printed word. No stuttering or stammering. No losing my train of thought. Just typos. Lots and lots of typos.

[@Autopsy6]

We, on the sewer crew, were driven to the edge of lunacy by a colleague who repeatedly used the word "tad."

[@ryankuczynski5705]

Every time I use 'delineate', I have this sketch in my head

[@jmricks73]

Same here.

[@imightbebiased9311]

I ascertained that someone would say this in the comments.

[@geraldperez2768]

Same!

[@CoopDVille-rx3hp]

Both "ascertain" and "delineate" bring me directly to Kids In The Hall and this skit. And no doubt they always will.

[@BeeBumper]

So once

[@sharonhall5441]

Felt like crap today, but I never fail to be cheered by Kids in the Hall. Thanks guys!

[@RAD6150]

Two to three hundred times daily? Inconceivable!

[@cbus]

whenever i'm reading and come across the word 'ascertain' i get distracted, thanks to the kids in the hall

[@mchoffner8497]

Bruce always brought out the idiosyncrasies of workplace dynamics

[@holycow818181]

Hmm, "idiosyncracies"...

[@tncorgi92]

I've been looking for this sketch for a long time, happy to ascertain it's here.

[@ManInArea]

Of all their great skits this is the one i think of most often.

[@jaywinger79]

I ascertained that this might be the case...

[@marcryptic]

Thanks for uploading this. I ascertain that it was the correct decision.

[@stephenhill9999]

“It’s the older men…the ones close to retirement!” Has always been my go to for years.

[@robsaice2776]

Top ten of all time for me. I've actually used this at work, i was a boss myself. lol.

[@bds8754]

I have been searching for this for years. Thank you.

[@lewdwig]

Eschew obfuscation, espouse elucidation.

[@EthanTrewhitt]

Verily.

[@rotisseriebear5394]

When Dennis Miller was a sports commentator, he used a lot of obscure references to old athletes. Someone in the crowd had a sign that said "Hey Dennis, Eschew Obfuscation!" When the camera panned the crowd and stopped on the sign, he read it and responded "Eschew you, pal."

[@menghao737]

Never use a larger word when a more diminutive selection would suffice. Or in other words, eschew obfuscation!

[@dimviesel]

Preposterous 😄

[@maranscandy9350]

@@menghao737 Or everyone could just point and make grunting sounds. 😂

[@jmathieson15]

Watching the news and they keep saying ascertain the election. It reminded me of this episode so I looked it up and checked to see when it was released. November 19, 1991....29 years ago today. I must’ve watched it that day. Makes me feel so old 😬

[@jackwody7774]

It always amazed me how they came up with all these imaginative sketches

[@mentalphilanthropist35]

I'm sure they've lived through these experiences. 😂

[@sstaners1234]

“Good morning fellas. Boy this works hard. Hand me that thing. Breaks over.” I ascertain you can’t go wrong with these phrases.

[@thedavesiknow4598]

Truly! I get chatty at work, so this is good advice.

[@unclvinny]

This one hit me right in the paradigm.

[@TrashLefties]

I had a coworker that used the word "copacetic" waaaaay too much.

[@destubae3271]

Did he listen to the Local H song once and never was the same again?

[@garaschneider4808]

"Copacetic" was the exact word Bruce said he heard all the time at a warehouse and how it inspired this sketch.

[@mangrove]

I like how Bruce only says "ascertain" twice before the joke is delivered. It's not overtly obvious, upon first viewing, but does set the tone for the sketch.

[@Burhanontheranch]

This also beautifully illustrates how it's really impossible to correct people because when you address one problem they'll just immediately shift their weird fixations over to another shiny thing.

[@SixxThirtyFive]

Even worse, using words they don't fully understand...over and over. A coworker of mine keeps using the word "validate" in place of the word "confirm". I've explained to her in the simplest of terms that confirmation is just agreeing to something, acknowledging the truth of something and that validation is making something legally valid or officials granting a sanction by marking a document (usually a seal), etc. She doesn't get it.

[@Grimenoughtomaketherobotcry]

@@SixxThirtyFive I hope they stop using "validate" and start using "invalidate" on you!

[@SixxThirtyFive]

@@Grimenoughtomaketherobotcry Whoa there. I didn't direct my comment at you. Why did it upset you so much? Did I bring up old memories? Are you having Vietnam-esque flashbacks from middle school English? Did I somehow INVALIDATE your widdle feelings?

[@Grimenoughtomaketherobotcry]

@@SixxThirtyFive May the heavens rain "INVALIDATE" upon you!!! INVALIDATE! INVALIDATE! INVALIDATE!

[@SixxThirtyFive]

@@Grimenoughtomaketherobotcry Does anyone else hear a baby crying?

[@LetsGo6009]

Ive used the like “who was it, was it Sanchez??” so many times over the years?

[@kellmac]

A former co-worker used the phrase 'one fell swoop' multiple times a day. She didn't like it when I started finishing the line as she was saying it, yet she didn't take the hint. 20 years later, I still despise the phrase.

[@blkrhino7961]

Two phrases I irrationally hate: "many moons ago", and "here's the kicker."

[@sequoiahughes8536]

One of my favorite sketches

[@SophiaAphrodite]

Then it was "literally". Now it's "underrated "

[@Pimsleurable]

I was always fond of *ameliorated* .

[@eikibekk663]

"Nothing can ameliorate the ineptitude of Princpal Skinner"

[@brianm5563]

"Good morning, fellas, hand me that thing, boy this work's hard, guys break's over." 🤣🤣

[@muskratrepairservices7701]

A perfectly written sketch. Which occurs in less than 3 minutes. Man they had a good thing goin on

[@a.bartlett9898]

This is my favorite sketch!

[@Clyde-S-Wilcox]

"Its the older men, the ones nearing retirement."😂😂😂

[@DurkMcGerk]

"So... other... few words... fit."

[@sampleoffers1978]

Do you know how much trouble this sketch got me in. Zero. Thanks Kids in Hall

[@DarthMohammedRules]

I'll be honest, I had to look up the definition of this word just so I could accurately ascertain if I was using it correctly in my comment here.

[@tinytanks]

There's so much Joe Flaherty in this character of Dave's.

[@BeeBumper]

These guys walking down the street all cool like is what a gang in the Disney universe looks like.

[@neuvocastezero1838]

This sketch is very ascertaining.

[@arthurjeremypearson]

This is the best

[@written12]

Another off-the-wall Kids classic. “You use the word ‘ascertain’ 200 times a day”

[@thetruthexperiment]

O man, I finally saw the word delineate used after all these years. I thought it meant something completely different. It doesn’t mean remove, it means define. So all this time, ever since I saw this back in the 1990s I’ve been driving dock workers crazy.

[@TobyLarge]

Sanchez here. You need to stop that shit.

[@sugarnads]

Youre thinking of delaminate

[@TokyoXtreme]

Basically "sketch out" or "outline".

[@SmithersJones]

When on doubt, blame it on Sanchez.

[@daveidmarx8296]

Dirty Sanchez.

[@NewfieLawNerd]

Inconceivable

[@christopherwellman2364]

Truly, you have a dizzying intellect.

[@Charliehund100]

Kudos to Sanchez for minding his own business and not complaining about Bruce's ascertination.

[@melissateague3936]

My favorite skit.

[@Cookie-Dough-Dynamo]

Modern dictionary: Random = strange Literally = figuratively Legitimately = literally Basically = exactly Irregardless = moron

[@jaedaens]

I was drunk and chatting with a few friends last week. One of them asked me what 'acquiesce' meant. She mentioned later that I said it again, so I had to ask if she'd ever seen this skit. She hadn't, but laughed at the concept since I guess I turned in to Mr. Ascertain.

[@ericwilliams1659]

Does anyone know which streaming service has "kids in the hall"? It is truly time for a binge marathon.

[@cosmonty]

the CBC gem website has it all available for free in Canada! idk if it works in the US but it should with a VPN

[@cynthia.marina]

Prime Video has it

[@christopherwellman2364]

I have the complete series on box set

[@ericwilliams1659]

It is on prime now and they have new content. I really enjoy them, they are a Canadian national treasure

[@christopherwellman2364]

@@ericwilliams1659 I have found it impossible to watch every skit. I can hardly get through a few episodes, let alone an entire season! Impossible!

[@russell2952]

The word synergy always made me want to throw my laptop at someone. For some reason people aren't using it now that they know they can be removed from a meeting with the click of a button.

[@tncorgi92]

I used to work at a direct marketing firm, the documents I had to prepare for the sales staff, all full of buzzwords and clichés, drove me up a fucking wall sometimes. It's a wonder there weren't any murders.

[@TokyoXtreme]

Nowadays we're getting "overwhelm" being used as a noun. "Avoid the overwhelm" and so on. If I were the boss, I'd definitely delineate my consternation with any personnel who so uttered such tomfoolery 😡

[@JANNAHPRINCESS]

I learnr Ascertain and someone showed me this video and now i love this. I wanna watch the series.... Though I don understand the meaning 100%:) And i searched it as "Kids in the hell".... It was HALL 😂😂😅😅😅 i thought it's weird too

[@tonyleva35]

Guys, break's over.

[@arthurjeremypearson]

Boy, this work's hard

[@ShelleyDuncan]

Good morning, fellas.

[@dinahkyle3196]

Hand me that thing!

[@draftday8078]

2021 anyone?

[@AL13NM]

I just now ascertained this word needs two S's.

[@petemcintire4339]

Ate breakfast at a restaurant with my sister, brother in law and 2 nephews many years ago and there was an old vet sitting near us that talked very loudly about getting his "DISCHARGE". Over and over. I did not enjoy my breakfast.

[@isaacbobjork7053]

I just said "ascertain" out of nowhere. Had to go to this video.

[@isaacbobjork7053]

Since I saw this the first time I can never again hear the word ascertain without laughing

[@mchoffner8497]

Timeless

[@mitchellhughes5180]

Genius

[@mikejones-vd3fg]

Ive ascertained im not capable of using deliniate in any sentance. :/

[@Emiliapocalypse]

Just saw a comment on reddit that reminded me of this sketch, not sure if they were referencing it or just using the word “ascertain” 😅

[@vijaynair2403]

I’ve ascertained that there’s a boom in the shot @1:41

[@MelancoliaI]

Ascertination

[@xINVISIGOTHx]

I have this 72 iq troll in my house that says "hullabaloo" several times a week for the last few years. Starting to drive me crazy, even though there's much worst stuff that he does. Like clearing his throat on average every 30 seconds, 17 hours a day

[@averycockburn31]

Anyone else watching this because of the Presidential transition requiring ascertainment?

[@amybesuden6892]

Ahhhh! Meeee!!!! Every time I’ve heard them say ascertain the past week I’ve thought of this clip, I finally had to google it up! I love you for this comment.

[@averycockburn31]

@@amybesuden6892 I just cannot hear...that word...without laughing. That and delineate. 😆

[@amybesuden6892]

Avery Cockburn All so hilarious! I don’t think I’ve seen that skit in close to 20 years. I was so proud when I described it then played it for my husband and I remembered it perfectly, even the delineate! He didn’t remem this one.

[@averycockburn31]

@@amybesuden6892 I'm pretty sure I've only seen this sketch once before today. I don't know why it stuck with me, other than the fact my husband and I bring it up every few years when someone says one of those two words.

[@mpacella88]

Yes 😂

[@atomzero1]

Was it SANCHEZ?

[@CandidZulu]

"Apparently kid" will have this talk in a few years.

[@cityhawk]

If you want to use a new SAT word every week, and use it as often as possible. Something like “antediluvian”.

[@RobotReg]

"Was it Sanchez!?"

[@4862cjc]

Comprendez vous?

[@MrBmick79]

this is as about as Canadian as Canadian humor gets....

[@mjm5081]

From the docks to the mountain tops let ascertain ring.

[@CruceEntertainment]

Kinda like “synergy”.

[@gabemorales7814]

Sir I ascertained that it's their problem! They're just jealous of me! It's my right to ascertain things!

[@samwlodawskitheone]

I delineate that Dave Foley has created a monster.

[@mr.martinez6932]

[one week later] "Well Williams, it's a shame but we've gotta let you go. Its true you stopped saying 'ascertain' but now the older men grumble about how often you say 'delineate'. And while you did learn that one from me, the larger point is you didn't stick to the 4 safe phrases! So empty your locker, today's your last day. Sorey"

[@maryelizabeth6797]

Who else had to look up ascertain to check the right usage?

[@konami1979]

This sketch is the reason why I've refused to say or write That Word.

[@bassage13]

Literally.

[@Henry-kz4gn]

This skit was very ascertaining.

[@written12]

Thanks for sharing these KTH perennials. By the way, would you have the Cabbage Head skit in which Bruce plays this sleaze out on a date?

[@Oldconcreteguy]

Or the word basically at the beginning of a sentence.

[@krogdog]

I wish I they would’ve had this intervention with some coworkers who repeated the same expression thinking it’s funny when it never was.

[@jonathanross149]

The were masters at ending a sketch

[@IsraelBenitez-ev7mj]

This is the funniest thing ever

[@DigitalPraise7]

Well I am off to look up the word delineate.

[@elizabethcablesings]

Comprendevous

[@markdanowsky9243]

"After election day, the ECA required each state to formally determine--or "ascertain"--the electors who would represent the state's voters by casting electoral votes on behalf of the candidate who had won the popular vote, and voted the executive of each state to certify to the federal government the identities of those electors." U.S. vs. Trump, Indictment #3

[@NiggletFarm]

Trump is on your mind 24/7 cretin 😂

[@arthurjeremypearson]

What comedy should be: show, not tell.

[@christopherpayment2954]

His boss should've taken a more holistic approach. Holistically speaking.

[@jimmyguitar2933]

They just wanted to say "ass" on network TV 🤣

[@Vengeant1]

❤

[@MSG685]

why put the punch line in the title?

[@MattJH]

The title includes the premise, not the punchline. It’s for all the people who’ve spent the last decade googling “guy who says ascertain too much” without finding anything.

[@MSG685]

@@MattJH fair enough

[@metamon2704]

It would probably be harder to fin it since I doubt anyone would remember the name of the sketch.

[@jamesmcswain8120]

I do that with "galvanic erosion"

[@Clydemere]

I found this on membean in school

[@FlatlandMando]

Bingo. At work, if I use a word with more than one syllable, a co- worker says "boy that's deep" & a few times it bugged me. Then I came up with... "NO, the world is DEEP...it is just up to us to try & catch up"! Usually that was the end of it.

[@LTPottenger]

It's like they spied on me as a child