Life Is Short (How to Spend It Wisely)

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Today’s episode is a wake-up call.
The reality is that time is passing you by.
If you want to live a more meaningful, successful, and happy life, you need to get serious about the amount of time you have with your loved ones, because it’s limited.
And unfortunately, today’s topic is something that is often not realized until it’s too late in life.
After you listen to today’s episode, you’ll learn exactly what you can do to make the most of the time you have.
For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page: www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/ep...
Follow The Mel Robbins Podcast on Instagram: / themelrobbinspodcast
I’m just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I’ll see you in the next episode.
In this episode:
00:00 Intro
02:36: Surprising statistics about the time you have with those you love
05:15: A story about an ice cube and how it relates to time
07:32: Sad, but real truths from a study on time
09:38: The first thing to do to be more intentional with your time
11:58: Recognizing what you’ve already missed out on
13:03: The beautiful and motivational thing about grief
16:12: Tapping into the love you have for people
16:53: What grief and regret can be really good for
17:38: Something you shouldn’t keep buried in your heart
23:35: A simple hack to help you to prioritize your time
30:02: Don’t make this mistake when it comes to time of yours and others
37:26: How to be more present in the day-to-day of someone you love
41:46: Why you need to get serious about being present
47:10: The profound powers of a text message and a group chat
#podcast #meaningoflife #podcastepisode #success
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For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page: www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/episode-170
Follow The Mel Robbins Podcast on Instagram: / themelrobbinspodcast
I’m just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I’ll see you in the next episode.
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[@gretchenbillings1402]

The person I'm making priority this year is ME💖

[@jennifermoffitt4635]

i have done this lately esp hitting 50 this year. Love my alone time. haha

[@just_joc]

Ditto❤

[@cathymumba]

Same

[@vitakhan307]

Wow, I could never thought of it, but yes, I like it. It could be two people, e. g. My Father and Me❤❤❤

[@MildredDeJesus-nf2wc]

Smart

[@jaanireel]

00:03 Time is slipping away, be intentional with loved ones 02:19 Value the time you have with loved ones 06:53 Prioritize spending time with loved ones 09:02 Grief is a powerful motivational force. 13:30 Prioritize meaningful moments over busyness 15:44 Prioritize important relationships and experiences 19:14 Make priorities clear in your calendar 21:05 Life is short, make priorities a big deal 25:11 Focus on making plans for yourself, not for others. 27:05 Prioritize quality time over quantity 30:39 Focus on fitting into someone's life rather than planning big events 32:42 Incorporate your child's preferences into family activities. 36:23 Be present in the moment without using phone 38:21 Be present with people, not the phone 42:17 Creating a family group chat to stay connected 44:12 Prioritize spending time with loved ones

[@lisaw9108]

Choose each moment, whether you are washing a dish or building a company. Be conscious. It’s amazing how much deeper, if not longer, “time” will feel. THIS is the journey, depth not length. ✨

[@Simplylisette]

This comes at such an appropriate time for me. My husband, an amazing man, is terminally ill. Time could not be more precious. Thank you🙏💖

[@Karmeon1982]

I grew up in an army family, so now that I am older we all settled in different places. it was my mother, father, me and my brother, moving around the world wherever the army ordered us to go. When I got married and had a child, I thought I had all the time in the world to spend with my parents. And my mother died of cancer unexpectedly in 2022. My father is now 70 and often wonder how much time we have left. This makes me want to live closer to him. My brother is another story. I don't know what his deal is, but he seems to be very uninterested in living close to family at all. Either way, I love them all dearly and I understand how short life is. I was widowed myself when I was only 36.

[@vickibazter3446]

Life should be enjoyed. Not feared

[@genxg1rl]

Prioritizing myself ❤

[@lesagrovas4827]

My New Year’s resolution this year is to let people that I love know it. One thing I started doing was to send a hand written letter to people I love every month. That means I send a letter to one of 30 people each day. People love it. It makes me so happy to know I have told my relatives and friends how much they mean to me. To accomplish this, I wrote a list for friends and relatives I love. Then I cut the list names into a drawing list. Each day I sit in my home office first thing in the am. I pull a name out of a small drawer. Write the letter. Then. Put their name into the written drawer. Try it! You will feel so happy. Your friends and relatives will be shocked and feel the love 💗

[@kebbasda]

Not sure who needs to hear this but your soul is eternal this earth experience is just that an experience!

[@roselangguth5609]

I hear you. We're spiritual beings having a human experience.

[@vickibazter3446]

Amen. The infinity loop. ♾️

[@salsitadk3752]

Hurts my soul to know that such a huge part of People in this world who do not spend quality time with their loved ones. I lived in a different country for 25 years. I made sure to go home 2 months every year and stay with my mother. Yes it “cost” work money and stuff…. But it was SOOOO WORTH IT

[@missnya4368]

You are so right 🥲 I need see my parents more they are only a few states away

[@deborahouck4164]

Mel, this podcast just hits home so much. I empty nested last year and was in the midst of eldercare for my mom last year. I was feeling all the feelings you have described. You really are doing the right thing to make people your priorities. In November, I unexpectedly lost my mother so I am in the midst of grief of the loss of my mother. Your discussion today is so relevant. I am planning her memorial service for the end of the month as she was cremated and we delayed the service. I am going to use several of your quotes and info from the time study in the eulogy I am preparing. I love that you say grief is love not expressed. My mother was always commenting that we were not spending enough time with her. She often said, life is about family and spending time with the ones we love. She had that wisdom and I did try to spend more time with her but often was too busy. Time was complicated for me as I was empty nesting as well as doing the eldercare. I was choosing to spend time with my children and less with my mom because I thought I would have time when the kids were gone. So I can say, make your parents a priority as well. It is a lot to process sending your children on to college and then caring and spending time with your parents. My husband said, "We don't think about our parents not being here anymore as they are the only people who have been with you your whole life." Think about that for a minute! It is so true. When you need your parents they are always there for you and now I understand my mother always wanting to be with us as a parent. I often dismissed it and sadly, we don't realize the gravity of what they say until it is too late. So, everyone, Mel's podcast is so on point! You need to make priorities to be with the people who are important to you! I have been doing that more this year! It makes me happy and I plan to share that message at my mother's eulogy at the end of the month with the other people I love! Thank you, Mel! This is a great podcast! And I want to tell you, I love YOU!!! PS...How can I get a transcript? I don't see that option. I would love to quote you for my mom's eulogy.

[@cjyrkas]

Loved this episode! My mom passed away unexpectedly 4 months ago. I’ve had a hard time visiting my dad. All the memories in my childhood home without my mom is SO much to bear so I’ve been avoiding. My dad needs to see me. He needs to see my kids. He needs to know we care. That I care. He’s my main priority now. This episode really gave me the kick in the rear that I needed to stop avoiding my dad. He’s 76! My grief will wax and wane but this ice cube is melting. Probably even faster now.

[@Sunshine_State]

If you prioritize buying cars with high car payments, buying a home you can’t afford, and registering your kids to play expensive sports then yeah you’ll have to miss a lot because you’ll have to work more. Are you really supporting your family by buying things you can’t afford rather than being there?

[@carolynbatta9525]

soo true. Things don't buy you happiness. A lot of people don't get this.....

[@Sunshine_State]

@@carolynbatta9525 exactly. I think a lot of people are caught up with “keeping up with the Joneses“ when they really cannot afford it.

[@mskmadeit]

Mell robbins is the best online mentor ever.

[@Teal_Seal]

I try to live in a way so as to not have regrets. Mom isn’t who I need her to be and I know I’m not what she wished for. It is what it is! But 7 years ago I started texting her goodnight, sweet dreams, I love you, etc and she texts the same to me. Sometimes I’ll send a cute animal video too 😂 I also try to call once or twice a week on my way home from work. She’s in her 80’s now and I’ll miss our nightly texts when that’s over. 😢 But I’ll never regret doing it. That was the hardest part of my dad passing, regret over not taking more initiative. Doesn’t even matter that he didn’t. All I could think about was how I didn’t make more of an effort. Can’t change the past, only the now. ❤

[@francinelaroche5305]

Both my parents are gonna be 85 this year!! I finally realized that makin money isnt worth the time i am losing with my family or risking my health.. This podcast is my life right now. Thank you Mel!!❤

[@marcelladominguez8787]

For me, it’s my mom. She is turning 79 and thankfully still quite healthy but I know time is limited. I pray we get to take one more trip too because we both love to travel. She sacrificed so much for me and my siblings and I took it for granted for much of my childhood. I hope we have many happy memories even more so now.

[@mrinmoyeemukherjee1420]

My dad is 73 and I feel the same.

[@sagegallagher]

Relationships matter most. Thanks for the reminder. One thing i need to do again is my little Zoom visits with my 5 year old granddaughter. I bought her art classes for Christmas that we watch together and then talk about over Zoom. She got busier and we stopped. But there's always a half hour somewhere to make important connections.

[@danielahofmeister1671]

❤ thank you for this reminder mel ❤

[@chrisreed7468]

LOVE this podcast. It really opened my eyes and made me think of things I need to be doing. It is simple things like she says. My parents are both in their 80's and they anniversary this year which is May 15. They will be married for 60 years. I am going to Idaho to celebrate Mother's Day, Birthday & Anniversary with family. Happy Times! Memories I will always treasure.

[@GinaSherman-gc2cx]

Love this video, it’s so true if u don’t make dates with people u never get together!

[@user-dt3wm8rn4j]

Life gets shorter, so why waste it with the wrong people. Sometimes, people don't have family around. Some are just wrong, being family. Son. Some are controlling and rejecting. Alone is a journey at an older age when the 20s would have seemed better to find oneself. Time. Self-love. Journey and independence at older age. Alone is a choice. Not anything desperate. ❤

[@passivelyobsessive5460]

I really appreciate your sentiment about it being a decision you are making, not the other party. Combining this with the poem Let Them by Cassie Phillips, if you want to make connecting a priority, you have to do your part such as reach out, make the plans, and be present. But if the other party isn't as interested in either reciprocating or making the best of the time together, let them.

[@nireeburr]

Well that’s my anxiety that just spiked .. since it’s only me left now! Ffs making new friends or love is next to flatlining. 4 mths in a new town . I met one person coz he reached out. People think I’m weird if I say hello to strangers.. 50 year old woman saying hello to randoms in small towns 😿 I want the 40 yr old me back.. 😢

[@xannaz9226]

Find a coffee shop that appeals to you and go there regularly. I'm in the same boat. 64, open, friendly, but no idea where my new friends are. Heck, if you're near Schenectady (unlikely) let's meet!

[@tanyageyer4251]

Finding a volunteer activity may be helpful. You can meet fellow volunteers. Show personal interest (not creepy but genuine) in others and always keep the golden rule in mind.

[@suecorliss2874]

I'm proud of your efforts 👌

[@KarenHall-pi7qe]

I’ve been doing this for the past 2 years. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done! I love filling my calendar with days to spend with loved ones. I lost 2 of my brothers within the past 2 years. Not something I expected. Please do this! Create memories! You won’t regret it!! ❤️

[@EatPlayLoveCO]

At 50 I’m recognizing how much I’ve missed out on with not having a deep connection to myself. While my children will always be my top priority, now I’m right there with them.

[@zucherobakes2454]

I want to spend more time with myself this year. To have fun, travel. I have spent too much of my life for others.

[@lisaharper9788]

Thank you Mel - I lost my best friend of 40 years in a tragic car accident back in February - this video really hit home for me...love you! ❤

[@oc3434]

Beautiful profound conversation. Thank you for sharing these thoughts Mel 💜

[@sarahbrooks4403]

I think 2-3 times is a lot for you to see your family and you should be grateful. I had to use my vacation this year to spend time with my dad and that is the only time I get. He just turned 80 and I am so happy I get a week with him.

[@LynAllure]

So beautifully articulated!! Every single day is a blessing and to be used wisely because we never get back the time that was spent✨

[@VillageCookingWithParnik]

Thank you Dear Mel😊 Much love from Iran ❤

[@contactrose7]

"Grief is all the Love you have for a person that you have not expressed or did not get a chance to express" 9.38. That hit home grieving the passing of my spouse

[@simonebressan8815]

Hi Mel Robbins, my name is Simone, I live in Australia, but my whole family lives in the south of Brazil. And right now, my parents housesl and sister's are underwater, victim's of the terrible floods. But we still have each other. When I opened your Chanel to here one of your messages. I cane across this video, and It made me feel so GRATEFUL, that in the middle of all chaos, even though they dont have a home to go back to, my family is OKAY and we have each other, and we are STILL PRESENT IN EACH OTHER'S LIFE. SO, thank you for sharing this video. Never forget to tell your loved ones how much you love them every opportunity you have the chance. ❤🙏 Life is short!

[@eulaguider21]

🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@Thenewlife83]

Mel, you're aging backwards......you're glowing ✨️

[@Ms_Meowingtons]

I've reached out to make others a priority, but i never get the same attention in return. If i don't reach out, i never hear from anyone. I like the let them theory - so I let them and i don't chase anymore.

[@redred-tk3yf]

Agreed 🤍

[@prgata1972]

I saw the title and it hit me so hard because I’ve been going through not having anyone to spend time with expect my son. My parents are gone my siblings could care less and I don’t have friends because no one else makes the effort! I’m skipping this episode hurts too much

[@catherineehlefeldt9806]

Mel, this really hits home to me. I lost both my parents, my mother at a young age & Mother's Day, every year is so very sad for me, I miss my mum so much & my priority now, is spending time with those I really miss ie; my brother & sisters

[@lindanaicker7020]

Hi Mel... Thank you for giving me wake up call with this podcast... It's everything I know.. But needed a reminder... I answered I need to prioritize my twin sons...final year of high school and my parents.. My Dad is also turing 80 in August this year ☺️🙌🙏sending you lots of love ❤

[@RA_5000]

I needed even from perspective of Checked out for life while greiving. I am still on my phone far too much. I have sent to my family and have to figure out the right way to send to someone in the extended family not very close with but see his parents getting older and he does not come to see them and only on occasion calls. I feel like it will be taken as I am judging even though it is coming from a place a love and experience.

[@jennifermoffitt4635]

we need this as an every day reminder.

[@karenandersonrealtor]

My takeaway - find ways to be in their life instead of trying to get them to make plans that take them out of their life. As a grandmother and mom of 3 adult daughters who live across the state and/or in a different state, I fully appreciate the melting ice cube metaphor. As always, your insights and raw honesty are brilliant and authentic. Love you Mel! ❤

[@impactmakerstribe]

Loved this

[@user-gm6kx2eq5k]

I love your authenticity Mel. ❤

[@angelinap09]

Hearing you is like someone reading the story of my life!

[@melaniebrecht]

What a wake up call. Thanks Mel.

[@Nutmeg_6666]

Saying it aloud: like your son, my daughter is also graduating from high school in June. She's not going away for college right away, she's going to be home and go to the local community college to start, but I definitely want to make the most of the summer before she has to start working and get busy with classwork. Also like you, I want to spend more time with my Dad. He is 76 but his health isn't great. I did make it a point to visit him back in March. We both have off on some Fridays but I had medical appointments scheduled on those Fridays off. I am going to try to schedule more "Father Fridays" with him. I also have a friend of almost 30 years I want to get together with. He said he'd be away for work early May but let's put something on the calendar, but he didn't pick a date. So I'm going to contact him after this weekend and see if we can schedule something. I also have another friend I spoke with recently, and we want to have a beach day. I'm going to contact her this week and actually schedule our beach trip ♥

[@elizabethmanz7940]

Thank you for reminding me Mel ❤ i shared with those I love 😘 and miss 😘

[@karriem5585]

Inserting yourself in their life without expectations. ❤

[@heatherframpton9693]

Thank you, Mel. I continue to find so much applicable content on your podcasts/videos. This is a highly underestimated subject matter! ❤

[@laurasiebert576]

My son is leaving for college too, have enjoyed taking a day off to ski with him, go to lunch etc. I feel the same, it’s just flying now. Last track meet, last scout meeting, etc. Enjoying every moment❤ Love the song Everything’s Right by Phish, they articulate exactly what you just said. Enjoy the now!

[@FrancinityCedarface]

My priority is my 7th unborn baby She might not make it so I'm making it priority to cherish every moment I have with her

[@KarlaSalinas]

I am working now on focussing only about my daughter, my husband and my self because I spend a lot of time talking care about other people that, if I do not contact them, they never check on me, that includes my family of origins😢

[@mathewbeena7572]

How can you be so authentic dear so truthful ❤️🙏

[@pattypohlit7803]

My kids Mel, 💖 year so relatable years ago, I have been taken care and relate with you for over 30 years. As far back to when you were working with Regis You are the coolest as a sister in my world 🌎 I'd so like to meet you in this life. Thank you so much.

[@annilindblad9229]

Wow, there was a reason for me hearing this now when my kids still are young ❤

[@AbigailsJoyfulLife]

Mel, can you do a podcast or mini series maybe on dealing with estranged adult children? 🤔🤦‍♀️ I'm listening to this and what is so painful is being a grandmother and 2 of my 4 adult children cut me out of their life after their abusive father after going AWOL for a decade while I raised them came back and manipulated them. OF COURSE I HAD TO PLAY BOTH ROLES of course I had to work day and night for my children to have ANYTHING whatsoever, raising four children was extremely difficult yet joyful because my children were my priority...sadly he still is horrible and has not changed of course in order to continue to reflect from his own self I was the perfect target . .. I do not neither have I ever spoke ill of him and at great cost I spent 20 yrs working on myself to heal from 20 yrs of the worst sadistic domestic abuse fathomable YES I MADE MISTAKES AND NEWS FLASH😳 I am human and still will in the future...but it pains me to see how much I love my children and yet I am estranged due to his influence on them

[@mathewbeena7572]

Oh so connect ing Mel

[@nicoleadiaz1]

Wow ! This couldn’t come at a better time. I’m battling on two completely different careers one that will I’ll make more money but be away from my kids or less money but more time with my kids.

[@diegoquinones607]

Thanks! Needed to hear this.

[@CharlotteHodgetts-du2jq]

I really enjoyed this one

[@user-qz2cx6rd3m]

This is by far the best I ever listened to , thank you so much Mel for both enlightening us and alerting us !

[@tracifoster1678]

Thank You for these great messages

[@anicegreenleaf]

You are lovely and a good element to life!! I love your podcasts.

[@Jigolpets]

Thank you 🥰🌸

[@heatherschrader9043]

So grateful for this content!

[@barbaraleigh64]

I loved hearing about your car trip....😂

[@brauliovega8461]

Love you Mel Robbins!!!!

[@RMSrealestate]

On point as usual and is a very important topic during this season of life! Thank you!

[@imlv2614]

Very profound, thank you sooo much❤

[@MarkPuglise-kb7gh]

Great thoughts and an eye opener for sure Thank You

[@elainegavio7464]

Mel, great content! There are alot of scammers in your comments though.

[@tracifoster1678]

Hey Mel, I watch you everyday, shared this with my daughter and friends on Facebook and BFF and Sister ♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@CP-ei7yo]

Thank you Mel! Thank you for sharing this info, tips, stories from your life. I love your transparency! I have many family members from my own kids, parents and grandparent that I want and need to spend time with before the ice cube melts completely. Thank you for helping me to see that I must make them a priority before I no longer have a chance. I love you Mel!

[@user-pk3zf2ir1w]

Yes! Mel! Thank you for going here! It IS grief… a constant state of battling the grief of life and all of this, and the battle of trying to remedy that grief when there isn’t a remedy. ❤❤❤ I love you for being so open on this subject.

[@lytaylor1204]

Not me listening to this at work and crying my eyes out 😭😭

[@cristinalz9395]

It all makes perfect sense for people with the ability to try and fit in with one's kids and family. I've been rejected! Great information! ❤ Blessings to all and good luck!

[@101GM8]

Thank you for this video Team Mel and EVERYONE that supports this channel keeping it available to everyone. What a blessing! ❤️

[@michellepotts4233]

Thanks for this Mel. This was a good reminder for dealing with my bonus daughter. She iis 15 & a mamas girl, so not always easy to connect with. Keep being there & keeep trying!

[@kevinvitualla]

"life is long if you know how to use it." - seneca

[@shalonda8669]

Thank you Mel! This is great! I’ve been the busy working mom, and my oldest son is a sophomore in high school, and I’m feeling everything that you mentioned. As you were talking about, I started creating a weekly appointment in my phone for my son. #meltingIceCube #Time 🫶🏽

[@aretiamaniou9091]

I absolutely love the way you talk ,you make it easy for me to understand you! I also think your so to the point on all the topics. Greetings from Greece Mel, lot's of love!❤️

[@debbiesather2571]

Mel ❤ Thankyou for the reminder , @ “ yes” people need find in general not intentionally they are busy busy @ Bam ones sitting @ the supper table the kids are gone doing there life 😜 parents have passed away friends have evolved too what they are doing yes “ Tic Toc” 🙏

[@myrameijer]

Love that Mel! How can I figure out and plan how I can fit into the lives of the people that are my priority? I wanna stay in their room! Good tips!

[@kimcooper6135]

Can you do a deep dive into science and psychology of binge and stress eating?

[@marielalunetta6489]

Thank you

[@VillageCookingWithParnik]

👌

[@Chris-hp2gg]

Time is your most precious commodity.😂

[@bisaandttslifetreasures2752]

Thank u for this i need to her this when i move out my mom house

[@kelliepalmer7828]

Ooof, what if you've only missed out on yourself, and you're grieving a moment for yourself. I feel fortunate to say I haven't missed out on anyone's life, and I perhaps make myself too available. I am still working on asking for my own needs. I also suffer Mom Guilt when I choose me time. I need an episode for mom guilt!

[@jennifermoffitt4635]

i do my best and see some friends.. getting tired. need more energy. I do spend a lot more time w myself haha i enjoy that.

[@sejalmalik3284]

Make a podcast on FOMO

[@nleposk1]

Check out the book of Ecclesiastes, great perspective on time

[@RodneyBost-gw6eo]

Nothing new under the 🌞. Things come and go. Most important thing is to fear God and keep his commandments and love others

[@xannaz9226]

I hear you, but I can't relate to this one. Maybe because, as a reformed people pleaser,, I've had my fill of prioritizing others over myself. I have lost people who don't reciprocate my efforts to stay connected. I'd rather find new connections that can appreciate me. But yeah, effort is needed for those connections that fuel you.

[@aysha.humayun]

You are right , this important fact is depicted in Quran’s Sura Al-ASR where Allah says “ By time , mankind is in loss, except those who have believed and done righteous deeds and advised each other to truth and advised each other to patience “ mankind is in loss because we don’t control time.We have to give time to our children, parents and other loved ones to gain salvation.

[@impactmakerstribe]

It's said that ....The way you live your days is the way you live your life.

[@sharonblumstein8429]

What do you do if the person is priority to me but they have other priorities

[@still_becoming]

Lost my dad when I was 20, he was 49 5 years later I lost my only sibling, he was only 18, back in 2014. I became anti family as a defense mechanism I guess, watching this hurts my heart

[@matlalitlali3139]

I wish I had known this earlier

[@jennifermoffitt4635]

that's nice.. How do you stop arguing w family? i'm estranged from my siblings. Have my mom and kids and husband. I'm losing myself too w time.

[@rmuscat1276]

What were the eight things or seven things? I mean so much of the same stuff but not really numbered I think I got one three and five

[@johnjosiah8839]

❤

[@georgeguevara808]

where do u get ur dialog. where and when did u decide to help. what happen last 5 years. u cant speculate if u witness a misjustice and said norhing. means u feel entiltled

[@marka2983]

I am wondering how this landed with your other children. Did it create any resentment or jealousy?

[@shannoncurry4395]

How is your relationship with your daughters?

[@aleynicol811]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤