Loot Crate March 2015: Covert | Ashens

[@IEnjoyBeingNaked]

This covert box should have stayed hidden.

[@c0mput3]

really not convinced about these Lut Crates

[@JasbrinaD]

maki~

[@Hellblade1284]

Buried in a landfill like all the remaining copies of Atari E.T.

[@TrueLeonPriest]

It's being handled by top men. "who?" TOP men.

[@Darkstreaker10]

Is it just me or did you used to have a ahegao profile pic?

[@onewordalllowercase1968]

I like that the key card, which is supposed to be an authentic replica of the in-universe one, still has a fucking Marvel logo on the bottom. Not one thing in there that I would want even for free.

[@dennett316]

onewordalllowercase Didn't even think of that....what a waste of time that is. You buy a replica of a movie or show prop, you don't want anything plastered on it that's not accurate to the show.

[@SadieB]

And the 'hologram' is just some cheap sparkly sticker

[@icecreamtub123]

I was literately pulling down my youtube feed thing because I'm on the wretched mobile version, and low and behold THIS APPEARS! Thank you for gracing us with this dross.

[@samholdsworth420]

KZbin 9 years ago on the phone was garbage what the hell where you doing? 😂

[@TheCharlieChitty]

A t-shirt which I didn't even manage to smile at, string, a card which is completely collectible despite the fact that there are an unknown amount of them created and the barcode serves no actual function, a watch that doesn't function very well and lots of bits of paper. £30 anywhere. Great deal. Why don't charity stores make random boxes of bric-a-brac and mail them to suckers for extortionate amounts of money? At least some good would be coming out of the whole thing then.

[@samholdsworth420]

Bric a bric a brontay!

[@Ghost_Of_SAS]

Is it just me or was this month's box just a bunch of paper and some twine?

[@GnarlySeaBass]

don't forget the keycard.............................

[@Ghost_Of_SAS]

GnarlySeaBass s and the crap watch

[@GnarlySeaBass]

I guess we undermined how truly awesome this box was, then. lul

[@TOASTEngineer]

Back in my day, all we had to play with was the twine!

[@captain_jerkass]

I felt cheated when I got the box

[@SpAMrOrange]

Classic Stewart. Tells you he bought a thing for his girlfriend and immediately proceeds to stating how crap it is.

[@Mkspokes]

Tim Loyens she threw it out I guess 🙂 😂

[@andrewkovnat]

10:24 Lol! I just love how he casually, sarcastically hit that box. See? This is what makes Ashens such a great channel! It mixes comedy with... Well... That's about it. Comedy! Keep up the great work Ashens!

[@beadyb.1781]

The second you opened the box my cat meows and I thought that the box had a cat in it.

[@georgesears934]

No. Fucking. Metal. Gear. Solid. Stuff. In. The. COVERT. BOX! They didn't even go the lazy route and make the box look like Snake's box. FOR SHAME!!!

[@th3trollwhodi3d]

A hideo kojima box

[@georgesears934]

***** No place for Hideo!

[@metroided34]

George Sears thats konami

[@Matt-cn2nn]

metroided34 sigh...nice try Mr Know it All, but Konami is the company. Hideo Kojima is the man responsible for these games, the whole concept was his from the start

[@metroided34]

Matt TooFast4U Kojima is not with Konami anymore tho

[@accountname2476]

Most garbage lootcrate yet.

[@curiosity___]

and that's saying something.

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

***** Depends on who's doing it. ;)

[@aserta]

I feel that because all LootCrates are garbage that calling it most, is not enough. We must go deeper.

[@Zoot101]

Everything in LootCrate is so tacky, the t-shirts especially. I just can't can't understand why people like this stuff.

[@r6random770]

***** same here. if they want to waste their money so badly they can always give it to me!

[@Mr_Life_Man]

Anyone else notice it's been a while since Ashens' ate some shitty food?

[@SelectKiko]

better send him this 40 year old corned beef

[@WeRunRunescape]

SelectNips I've just found a Malteser down the side of my sofa. Might send him that.

[@eewweeppkk]

J Robson Just chopped the head off a snake I saw wandering in the sewers. I'll tell him it's a delicacy in India.

[@dennett316]

The Creator The snake was wandering? So it had legs? You should have captured it alive, you could have sold it to a museum or something.

[@SelectKiko]

Paul Dennett They call those lizards.

[@damianwezzterman9218]

I've already watched a couple of unboxing videos of this months Loot Crate but somehow watching your unboxing video is always better due to the humor only you can provide. One of these days I'll finally sign up for these things.

[@AmericaTheEnslaved]

loot crate: 9 bucks worth of stuff for 20 bucks.

[@IamTealeaf]

To be fair to them it’s usually worth about 40$ it’s just 40$ of stuff we don’t want

[@aceisking]

@@IamTealeaf nor need in our lives

[@FlyingHigh5415615642]

Paracord brackets are big here in America. They are called five fifty paracord they can support five hundred and fifty pounds and split into seven strands to be used in traps or to stretch the rope farther. Each one of those strands splits in two and that bracket probably has about ten meters of rope in it or 140 meters when split up.

[@mantisxz]

Bracelet*

[@samueltaylor5420]

I can't fathom Dan's accent when he says 'purple'.

[@elliebailey9178]

Omg there is gonna be so much fan art of those stories

[@skeletonthiever]

I was going to go to sleep, but I guess that can wait.

[@bipen7110]

Same.

[@arefx]

terrible LC go to sleep

[@bipen7110]

Never

[@taylorpayne1809]

Same

[@FirstnameLastname-fx3lo]

Tacooo

[@GenaTrius]

I picked up a pack of those Field Notes books in a curio shop somewhere. They're just little pocket notebooks, but a little pocket notebook is a damn handy thing. You don't quite notice all the little things in life you'd like to write down until you've got something in your pocket to write them on. People who are more adapted to typing on their cellphones than me might not feel that way, though.

[@andrewmorrice9139]

7:42. Agent Leet? What? Is 1337 meant to stand for leet? I'm confused.

[@MrOTBxTrains]

I was having a really shit day because I've been depressed lately. Thanks for making it less shit, Ashens. I love your vids

[@mrcraggle]

Let's break this down: a t-shirt, a broken watch (£6.95), 2 note books (£1), a lanyard with badge(£1 - £2), a mad libs book (Around £2.65), Paracord Braclet (£6.28 on Amazon for 100ft and they're super easy to make), Ninjak comic (£2.49) and Orphan Black comic (£2.65). So excluding the t shirt (which is an exclusive design), the total cost is around £24 while a monthly subscription costs around £20 with the t shirt. So are you saving money with Loot Crate? Yes but only in a sense. In America, this same stuff is £7 less due to shipping costs and does anyone really want any of this? Probably not. While most Loot Crates have at least 1 interesting item, I can't point to a single thing here that I'd want that I simply couldn't just buy elsewhere.

[@OmegaSoypreme]

I sort of met Cumberbatch once. I was on a walking tour in London and we were at St Jame's palace getting talked at by the guide. Then all of sudden, here comes Sherlock himself! All the girls swooned a bit and he politely said hello to us all. Then he got into his rad car and left. He'd been at the palace presenting some kind of award for something, I can't remember. But it was all a bit exciting. First day in London and I had a celebrity encounter. Good times.

[@BlazeDeval]

I have a problem with that bracelet. If you needed to use it as a tourniquet, wouldn't you, gee I dunno, *bleed out before you unwrapped the fucking thing*!?

[@cakewolf44]

First they are easy to unwrap you could have enough rope untied from it to make a tourniquet within seconds Second tourniquets aren't the only thing rope can do those bracelets a very useful especially since they are good for lashings which allow to make nearly anything with a few sticks and that rope

[@Zadrack2]

cake_wolf I'll lash you with it then, shush.

[@statuesquepineapple4387]

Anyone who carries around a para-cord is also going to be carrying around a knife, otherwise they have the brain capacity of a particularly slow boiled egg. You can't do anything with a para-cord without a knife. No matter what you make with it it's going to have ten feet of spare cord hanging off it if you don't cut it to size. You can cut off enough for a tourniquet in less than ten seconds.

[@minimite9493]

It's totally dumb and useless. People defend it because they don't want to feel dumb for wearing one.

[@BlazeDeval]

cake_wolf Typically people aren't very calm when in need of a tourniquet

[@drummydrum4520]

Why does this kind of stuff entertain me so much? It's Ashens sitting at a couch reviewing (for the most part) shit products. But I still love whenever he does these!

[@RuTheSuperJew22]

Keeping within the 'spy' theme It appears that the watch begins to self destruct after it tells you the time.

[@TheGodsgonk]

Something about that punch was extremely satisfying. Thank you for doing what we all wish we could.

[@NyxDiscordia33]

I'm not one to be so negative, but... 2 empty notebooks that are trying way too hard to be quirky a fucking LANYARD that goes to a show prop replica that isn't even authentic (there's a Marvel logo on the keycard) an okay little watch thing (with a broken strap) A T-Shirt trying way too hard to be funny and pop culture a comic book of...something? At least it was physical and by IDW; they do great prints. A digital comic book of some kind of ninja a book of mad libs...what? The only thing that I really liked was the overly sturdy wristband that just turned out to be a length of really durable rope. Again, I hate to be so negative but this Loot Crate was terrible and honestly, that's what I've felt about Loot Crate as a whole. It's a fantastic idea that is executed very poorly. All of the items in the box are more often than not either gimmicky or of just poor quality. I really don't have an issues with the figures that they ship with them, though. Funko Pop make very nice detailed figures and statues. Some of the T-Shirts were okay, but most of them were just kind of...stupid. They always end up packing the box full of many tiny, insignificant items rather than just a couple meaningful ones. The megaman helmet stand, I will admit, was fucking cool. If they don't step up their game or only offer the good items to people who pay more, then I highly recommend that you cancel your subscription with Loot Crate. Thank you for your time.

[@NyxDiscordia33]

And regarding the notebooks, yes I know Adam Savage loves Field Notes, but they're really out of place in this crate. Also, Agent 1337 was beyond cringeworthy.

[@AlmightyDoubleHelix]

I really hate the funco pop figures. They take very unique, stylized characters and make them into generic figures.

[@toadette2097]

wait i think disney also did something like the pop figures but with repaints. i swear theyre all very VERY ugly and they never changed the mold, they always use the same one. but i do think the derpy and pinkie pie funko pop are cool

[@ToyotaSPRINTERTRUENO1986kouki]

thefivespokewheels lol keyboard hero

[@ConfusionPlus2]

thefivespokewheels Be an hero.

[@KiMcHuNgLeE]

I can't be the only one that loved this months box? The watch is cool, the shirt is awesome, the para cord is interesting. The madlib book and the notes and comic I could do without.

[@protendi]

Jesus Christ, Sounds like it was a slow month down at Loot Crate.

[@gorden2500]

Those field notes are actually reasonably sized brand of notebooks. very handy for some people. i wasn't crazy enough to buy them but i used some notebooks that i carried around in my back pocket before.

[@BaggyMcPiper]

Why would anyone subscribe and pay a substantial sum each month to receive a box of licensed garbage nobody wants?

[@Undrave]

***** I know right? Most of the 'cool' stuff I could just buy on my own, and I wouldn't have to be cluttered with all the garbage like that gift-shop quality Bond t-shirt. I really don't see the appeal to these random box services.

[@FirstnameLastname-fx3lo]

but.. but its over 20 dollars of value! who WOULDN'T want that??

[@Undrave]

I don't want most of the junk in those boxes. I already have too much stuff from my regular purchases with no room for!

[@yadabub]

Shane Jinxdory I know, right? That watch would be worth at least a dollar if it wasn't broken.

[@TalesOfWar]

So they can make videos about it and make more money than they paid for the thing back in ad revenue.

[@godslaughter]

Not gonna lie, I actually enjoyed the Mad Libs part more than the box. Says a lot about it, doesn't it

[@Yourwolfsdengaming]

Remember guys, these cost $20 or so shipped in the U.S. For that price, I think I'll just go to the dollar store, close my eyes, and pick 20 random $1 items.

[@Boogie_the_cat]

Oh no, hydrocephalic James Bond. You blew it up, damn you!

[@TheCutiePatrol]

Ashens: I brought this same watch for my girlfriend Also ashens: look how slow and pointless this watch is, I'm going to sell it on ebay!

[@probablyrajir638]

The Mad lib was the best part of this video. Ashens, you have a beautiful handwriting

[@dennett316]

Was just going to say that the watch was kind of alright in a rubbery, cheap kind of way. Then Ashens said the strap was broken. What a pile of shit this box was. Those notebooks are actually kind of insulting...like another item they were trying to get, they couldn't get in time, so had to throw something in quick as a replacement.

[@STDrepository]

Watching this show has given me an insight into all the obscure words british people pronounce in the stupidest way possible. "LAN-YAHRD"

[@rockerseven]

didn't lootcrate pay ashens to review their boxes? what were they thinking? had they never seen his videos? were they hoping to get more publicity to encourage people to buy them? if anything, i would guess that it had the exact opposite effect and it's encouraging people to save their money and NOT buy them.

[@loopholesloopy]

***** Yeah not knowing what comes in the might have tempted me to buy, but with how much it costs and seeing that they're consistently bad it's turned me off.

[@rockerseven]

Loopholes loopy for all the lootcrate reviews i've seen, i have yet to see one where i would actually liked to have had. i mean there are a couple here and there that contain some decent items...but a lot of times you can buy them separately on their own. sure it might not be a "lootcrate exclusive," but it's not all that different anyways. the other thing to is that because they have a very wide selection of properties to choose from (video games, TV shows, movies, books, and pretty much anything that is or has been related to geek/nerd culture), the chances that all the items in the box will be things you like is very very low. i mean really, unless you love vinyl figures and a bunch of useless tat (like pens or keychains or whatever), this isn't really worth buying.

[@rockerseven]

Lassi Kinnunen AH! so that explains the dumb "tips for the perfect unboxing: document, share, enjoy" thing that is on every lid.

[@villanelo1987]

I like how everybody keeps telling how terrible the crates are in every single video... but they still get back the next month to watch the next video, giving Ashens a reason to do more videos.. People, you have to be more consistent in your complains... :p

[@channelfadge7438]

I like seeing ashens complain about the shitty crate. its always a slight disappointment when the stuff in the crate turns out to be pretty good

[@dennett316]

***** The crates do suck most of the time....but Ashens contempt for the contents is entertaining as hell to listen to. He's one of the few who's actually somewhat honest about the shittiness of the items in the Crate, instead of talking with false enthusiasm about how awesome everything is.

[@sock2828]

The reason I come back is to see Ashens review them and talk about how shit they are. Makes sense since the whole fucking channel is about him reviewing crap items for the amusement of the audience.

[@villanelo1987]

TheFarmerDeBoer And my critizism was about the people who complain, but still watch the videos, not about Ashens or even the crates. If you hate the crates that much... why would you watch a video about it? I understand if you watch the first one or two, since you maybe don't know what you are getting into, but... it's been a while now. If you have not liked it the first 30 times... I doubt this is going to be the one for you. Why bother coming here just to tell how bad you think this is?

[@FhtagnCthulhu]

***** Its fun to see people make fun of things, welcome to the internet.

[@Fokeno]

"I bought my girlfriend one of those" ~ Ashens. Stuart, we all know she isn't real. Chef Excellence in a dress isn't what you can call a girlfriend. Stuart, please come out of the basement, we're worried about you.

[@kodabrotherbear]

The lanyard is a reference to a episode of agents of shields when the guy from the picture he hands lanyards when the shield agent go to the secret bunker girl after Hydra takes over

[@ClayFoxx]

4:55 I think they just broke Ashens

[@TheEkaya]

Those notebooks were Rite-in-the-Rain notebooks. The paper can get wet and still retain any text written on them.

[@TofranBohk]

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is really good. You should give it a chance.

[@CatheteriZedEYE]

its awful, bunch of wooden actors squeezing out the worlds longest turd

[@channelfadge7438]

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

[@twitchster77]

I got sick of it a few episodes in. It fucking sucked >.

[@BassGoesBoom1]

what about Agents of LOOT?

[@TofranBohk]

twitchster77 I've heard that multiple times. It seems quite a few people didn't get into it in the beginning and haven't seen it since. I recommend giving it a chance.

[@greybeard29]

I love how Stuart always takes the piss out of people who say they'll unsubscribe

[@DarthPerkins]

Homunculus...what a reference!

[@user-yo2lt8ch7v]

Lee Perkins BLYAT! *squashes with book*

[@LloydJamesWu]

BLOODY HELL,ARE WE STILL DOING THESE?!

[@TwilightTheCabbit]

Two terrible Loot Crates in a row? God dammit. I haven't gotten my crate this month, but I can already tell that it's totally not worth what I pay every month. Hopefully it'll be good next month. I mean, they can't have THREE terrible crates in a row, right?

[@georgesears934]

The Neverending Twilight And that is what we in the trade call "tempting fate".

[@loopholesloopy]

The Neverending Twilight You basically took a gamble, and I feel if you've paid for it your more likely to be nit picky, but there's always like maybe one good item surrounded by shit or just meh stuff. This month sadly it was all garbo though.

[@TwilightTheCabbit]

Jimmy De'Souza There have been several that weren't terrible. There've been a fair number of items within Loot Crates that were actually worth getting them. This one and the last one were just absolutely terrible. Loopholes loopy And what's life without a few risks? X3

[@ekmad]

Here's a top tip: stop giving them your money

[@WHATISTHAT100]

Oh trust me they can...

[@mantisxz]

Every time he said "adjective" it sounded like "objective". Oh, you kooky Brits, you.

[@adrienperie6119]

*You should destroy each badge at the end of each video in a new and interesting way.* By the way, this crate is probably the crappiest yet, but to be honest we are comparing somebody farting in your face with somebody farting in your face after eating a burrito here. Also I would be incredibly pissed off at them putting their logo on everything, ruining everything and removing all subtlety if I had been gullible and naive enough to buy a subscription to PoopCrate.

[@ekmad]

I will admit I laughed at the Madlibs initially but I put that down to Ashens delivery more than anything

[@Hanklerfishies]

Field notes is a neat company, but honestly this box is a total snooze. Wouldn't miss this series at all if it left.

[@npiper]

Check out the field notes notebooks. If they're the same thing we've received in another subscription box, they're waterproof when you use pencil or some pens. The paper is special, so it may actually be useful!

[@francistheodorecatte]

I'll pay for postage for the Field Notes.

[@zabukazar]

The lanyard is a thing on A.O.S. You kind of have to watch the show to get the joke.

[@n0isyturtle]

Holy hell, people paid real money for this?

[@Carrosive]

"a love random humour me, ooooh potatoes!" - Every frequent viewer of BBC3

[@Jobaa87]

I like that you're affiliated with them, but you don't pretend to be excited over garbage like some other youtubers.

[@Gamesta100]

Lord Century Egg cracked me up. I bet everyone would quake in their boots at the mere mention of his name lmao

[@D.G.M.]

"a hideous fridge with hair all over his inner thigh"

[@Re-vant]

Wow ashens could find more useful stuff at poundland for cheaper.

[@bigshambowski]

"Spy Wars. A space tale in which spies from the tall rebel forces go up against a scary robotic man in flowing purple robes who wears a large helmet on his chest hair and calls himself Lord Century Egg."

[@JellyDrive]

Do more madlibs make a dedicated episode

[@dopk9540]

i saw one of those watches in poundland a few days ago, with the lootcrate exclusive logo

[@Makron5]

This is a rip off even for a $20 a month crate of expo bag fillers (It's 20 after S&H). That watch is like $5-8 and it took the budget of that crate. (And you know they probably got it for like $3-4 at most) This may be the worst one they've done yet, they kinda hyped this up as some sort of spy tat thing, but it's barely themed to it and it's all just rubbish even for a crate of rubbish.

[@kfsevensoviet]

The shop where I work sells those bracelets for about 5 USD each... But ours at least have a cheap safety whistle built into the clasp.

[@HedgehogStudios1]

People pay to have this shit delivered to their homes?

[@PandaliasKay]

The return of Chef Excellence!

[@TheBrianJ]

A reminder: Some People Like Some Things, Some People Don't Like Some Things. Really, even now it still surprises me how much hate Loot Crate gets in these comments. Wait, this is youtube, hate doesn't surprise me at all.

[@Adahop]

The quality of these items was really rather low, though - fan or not of the franchises included. Keep in-mind that these boxes are $20 each in the US ($26-$30 each in the UK) and you just have to take it on faith that you'll get your money's worth.

[@TheBrianJ]

I did a quick search, this box added up to about $37, retail. I don't think the quality of the items this month was really low, although I will definitely say that I liked last months crate better. As you said, you take it on faith. But I think that's kinda charming, you know? If you don't want to go for randomness, there are plenty of crates with themes (my friend just subscribed to a Marvel one). And if you don't like randomness at all, you can do what a lot of people do; just buy what you want. I'm not trying to tell people they have to like Loot Crate, really. I'm just surprised at how ANGRY people sometimes get in the comments, declaring every single crate worthless and what not.

[@sock2828]

***** Well after you average out the quality of what all of the loot crates come with in a year or more, I'd suspect it probably wouldn't justify the price tag for most people. That's why I don't understand why people pay for these. Seems like a huge waste of money so far. There is almost always so much disappointment, and obviously cheap filler items that ultimately are marked up a huge amount. Maybe it'll get better one day, but so far it hasn't really.

[@Adahop]

***** Personally I discount the shirt from the value of the box. Even if it's a shirt I like, custom-printed tees are a dime a dozen these days. The market is beyond saturated with trendy tee-shirt manufacturers. Anyway, on top of that most of the items were just printed bits of paper or plastic with a loose theme. Of the two wrist-related items, the paracord bracelet was interesting (and actually faithful to the themes - I'm a massive Avengers/Marvel fan but they are FAR from stealthy) but they're rather cheap just about anywhere. The watch, which was the most unusual and probably most expensive item in the box, was damaged on arrival.

[@TheBrianJ]

Yeah, that's shitty about the watch. Mine arrived fine, but getting something broken like that has to suck. Although I haven't had to deal with them, I do hear Loot Crate is good about refunds/replacements if you get a broken item.

[@Metrallata]

3:40 "I dont know why im doing this incase you cant imagine this at home" lmao

[@SmeddyTooBestChannel]

Box is called Covert, no Metal Gear stuff. 0/100

[@LUNATIC75]

5:02 Sums up the experience quite nicely.

[@BACCHUS777]

These get consistently worse and cringeworthy every time.

[@TMBGTransformer]

The mad libs at the end were the best part. Such timeless films.

[@L.argemike]

make more videos of you NOT GAMES PLEASE.

[@VenseyNess]

reggie fils-aime The games are over now. He played them all.

[@L.argemike]

oh, oh good

[@ImmaThatGuy]

reggie fils-aime Reggie confirmed for hating games, Nintendo is doomed.

[@channelfadge7438]

hes just sick of the games that ashens plays. stop playing games with his heart stuart

[@adamszuszkiewicz1709]

ImmaThatGuy Brad is that you?

[@dantelocicero3469]

Field notes are actually a really high quality notebook. If that's a limited edition them that's actually pretty nice.

[@DarthKato]

Man, they gave him a pile of shit this month. =/

[@BradleyTurmel]

the wrist band is actually a survivial band, me make them in scouts. they are so tightly woven that when you undo them they have 2 metres of rope on them.

[@CommodoreFan64]

This service has really turned to shit!!!

[@c0mput3]

turned shit? always seemed shit imho

[@CommodoreFan64]

C 0mput3 True, but they did have a couple of somewhat cool POP figures in some of the earlier ones, but I was not gonna pay for just that, and the random chance I would get one I would actually want to keep.

[@TheJollyGamerJoe]

Glad i made this months lootcrate my last. Just got a corner of my room full of junk i'll never use or need from them.

[@AisukurimuYusukurimu]

Ashen, you do not deserve the money you receive from these surreptitious plugs, demonetize your channel and your overplayed comedy act will be taken wholehearted.

[@AisukurimuYusukurimu]

specopsmason Yea, you tell 'em brotha'! This chump eats expired food stuffs every meal and has the gall to video it, the toxins are bound to have concentrated in his brain matter by now.

[@jackglossop4859]

Darude - Sandstorm

[@AisukurimuYusukurimu]

Jack Glossop Dollar menu McWit. Pat yourself on the back.

[@lilyroselynbrooke]

My husband and I followed the clues given on the loot crate box and completed the "mission". It took about half an hour and was fun. We had to give our email but I'm not sure if we are going to get anything out of it.

[@_thorkon]

That bracelet thing is a nifty way to store Para-cord. It is used in a lot of environments in many ways, and can be a life saver in difficult situations if you know how to use it. EDIT: I actually wrote this literally a second before he got the leaflet out xD

[@asteroidrules]

This tat is below even Ashens' normal standards.

[@Dreadjaws]

I applaud you, Ashens. You must be the only Loot Crate reviewer I've seen who doesn't just pretend all this stuff isn't stupid. Subscription boxes can be very nice, but Loot Crate seems to pull stuff from the bargain bin in dollar stores.

[@RossOriginals]

The funny thing is, in the books he asks for "stirred, not shaken".

[@NathenMixon]

Great video on your LootCrate! I had fun doing my video but sometimes I don't always get what I want lol.

[@michaelbianchi22]

That orange bracelet is a parachord survival bracelet, it's made out of parachute cord and is very tough, so if you find yourself in an emergency situation where you need rope, you just unravel it. I have several.

[@spoofsrocks13]

Hey what does the url on the box lead to? Also I quite like agents of shield. I'm glad they used a season 1 reference as I'm not caught up and didn't want a spoiler.

[@SarahLovesSheep]

*entry music* bloody hell…are we still doing these!…I love saying it every time!!!

[@ethanebert9033]

That bracelet is made from parachute cords and you use if your in a "survival situation" they usually have about 40 feet of rope on them

[@BubblesTheBard]

You mean to tell me they didnt include any Archer stuff in this box? What the shit, Woodhouse?!

[@calink7086]

the bracelet thing unravels and is useful in survival situations and stuff

[@rurkburk]

Everytime I get Loot Crate e-mails I think "Oh man, maybe I should sign back up, might be cool stuff in this one" then Ashens releases a video on it and I'm glad I hadn't...

[@TheDutyPaid]

It's not an iris of a eye for James Bond it is barrel rifling from a gun.

[@throwaway7442]

There's an add before I got to find out if it was stirred

[@jackieelizabeth8614]

same, the second before the shirt dropped. Bloody coke cola

[@user-yo2lt8ch7v]

Jackie Elizabeth except my ad was an unskippable one about joining the RAF I'm 13

[@StevenBeshears420]

I actually really like those "field notes" note books.. They're pretty cool. You can take notes with them, or grocery lists or something..

[@Zaiaza]

Mad Libs was my childhood.

[@bassl0va]

So how do these things work? You pay monthly for a box of tat to be delivered to your door? Sounds great...

[@Mick_92]

bassl0va If you are Ashen.

[@mr_selfdestrukt]

Paracord bracelets are pretty handy to be honest. I personally don't dig the colors of that one, but at least you got *one* useful thing out of that loot crate.