Loot Crate / Geek Gear / Amazing Mystery Box May 2018 | Ashens

[@Dzeeff]

"If I actually wanted that, I'd be pleased" basically every loot crate out there

[@FangsAnalSatan]

Why Nobody Likes Loot Crate

[@beauaadams153]

Nice seeing you hear, I love your videos just watched your cyberdark video this morning.

[@MGX93dot]

Are you a loot box opening channel?

[@blacklegmelloi9730]

Hey it's my favorite pack opening channel

[@OurpleOuppy]

Dzeeff? On MY Ashens channel? It's more likely than you think.

[@Bleats_Sinodai]

"I hate sand. it's coarse and rough, and it gets everywhere!" - Ashens, 2018

[@spencerbelcher9688]

Beat me to it hahahaha

[@lumios3814]

That's literally the best quote of 2018. I'm just wishing that he said this sooner.

[@DAJ01]

"It's over budget Stuart! The tat is more than 1 pound!"

[@sdsd1801]

The tat has the high pound!

[@pamjohnpamhat7911]

Praise the Sand.

[@mudkiptyler]

The bag was full of sand because the Thanos T-shirt killed the other loot crates

[@AbiRizky]

Rad Bones I bet the other loot crates didn't feel so good

[@TheGoldSwordSquad]

I feel like the "Bloody hell are we still doing these" should sound more reluctant every time

[@rawr3112]

Can someone make a ringtone of Ashens going "ohhh I went there sister" iconic 😂😂😂

[@RobinBeirne]

Oh my God, that 'I love horses' song from that horse magazine advert... I had suppressed that until now Ashens.

[@MathewHaswell]

Mentski sings it from time to time, though I'd not heard it in its original form until now.

[@chaoticklutz3633]

Ashens giveth and Ashens taketh, now Ashens giveth again! 🙌

[@natgrant1364]

Oh giveth a break unto me.

[@anononomous]

Loot Crate should be renamed the "oo god there's not much in here" Crate.

[@iamjogun]

anononomous literal garbage works too.

[@Adrastia]

At least it's not 36 horrible items like it used to be.

[@lasarousi]

anononomous loot crate quality and quantity came to light when ashens added other boxes to fill the time on each unboxing video

[@OnlyEpicEmber]

Or 'One good item, if you like the franchise, you'll probably enjoy it. There's also a T-shirt which may be in your size and you might like it. The rest is filler.

[@iaincowell9747]

@@Adrastia Now it's about 8 horrible items.

[@slushosaur]

Note on the Dark Crystal Cards, the "abstract" ones are all concept and background drawings by Brian Froud from when he worked on the film. They can also be found in his book The World of The Dark Crystal, a truly magical book if you loved the film. It gives Skeksis so much more character development than in the actual movie.

[@kieranfitz]

Faint look of the old Elijah Wood? The man hasn't aged since he was 12.

[@JoeDP25]

I am a sucker for nice maps of pretend places

[@ethanlaborde]

JoeDP25 So am I!

[@retrodanitsch]

JoeDP25 do you make them up in your head too?

[@ippo4502]

Man I'm so glad I've never bought a loot crate type mystery box. Everything in them just seem so shite. Would feel like the most gigantic waste of money ever.

[@MysteriousJojo]

Surprised Lootcrate haven't cut your name off the mailing list at this rate.

[@maxscardanelli6185]

Mysterious Jojo You know what they say, bad publicity is good publicity.

[@morgenergy4074]

They won't even take off people who pay for them and don't want them anymore, so Ashens will be receiving them for as long as Lootcrate exists. Which shouldn't be much longer, hopefully.

[@jimmymcgill2961]

Max Scardanelli No one says that, that is not a saying. Bad publicity is bad publicity. The saying is “Any publicity is good publicity.”

[@Psicose]

"I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere." -Ashens, upon realizing his bag was waylaid by The Sandman

[@BonnVoyageTravels]

WHEN YOU HAVE INSOMNIA AND FINALLY GOOD CONTENT APPEARS ON KZbin AT THE RIGHT TIME!!! :D

[@HerHollyness]

Genuinely trying to help, not being rude - if you have insomnia, sticking a screen in front of your face is the worst thing to do. The blast of blue light at the wrong time is making the issue worse and effectively ‘teaching’ your body that it shouldn’t be asleep then.

[@maxscardanelli6185]

HerHollyness I couldn’t have said it better myself man. As someone with insomnia, I always have my phone screen side down and off when I go to sleep.

[@BonnVoyageTravels]

i usually wouldnt watch anything at night, but I had been up with no luck for hours so just decided it was better than getting annoyed with myself ahah

[@PuppeterStudios]

I don't think there has ever been a knife handy to the brown sofa

[@Wonchop]

"Distressed edging"

[@ObeseMurican]

I'd frame the cushion covers and call em canvas prints to feel fancy.

[@ZacHawkins42]

All these "collectable coins"... you're not fooling anyone, loot-box salesmen, we know those are just unused Pogs slammers.

[@Darcnova1]

Zac Hawkins Pogs wish they felt as good in the hand as those coins...only reason I keep mine haha

[@ZacHawkins42]

Darcnova1 I have (still, yes, I'm a packrat) one made of solid brass about a half an inch thick. Almost broke my toe on a bad slam once 😂

[@insanemreric]

I fell asleep to this video last night. I finally found something that makes me sleep. Make more videos please.

[@kek23k]

Highly recommend picking up the remastered anniversary bluray of Dark Crystal, the colours are fabulous. Watched it a couple of months back and it's still a fantastic film.

[@brianm6337]

"That's not the cup of a carpenter!" No- it's the cup of a gamer- and it grants you a 1up.

[@Horcrux_maker]

"Distressed edging" sounds like a Domme service

[@kaoskaaoskaaaos]

I have the same problem. A bag of sand that has never been in contact with sand and everything near or in the bag is sandy. I've tried to take the sand out the bag but it's still sandy. It's an IKEA bag.

[@blacklegmelloi9730]

Sean yB did you put it in the wash

[@kaoskaaoskaaaos]

Blackleg Swagji you can't put a plastic IKEA bag in the wash Btw an update -i think it's not sand it's washing powder

[@blacklegmelloi9730]

Why cant you put it in the wash? Use cold water and dont put it in the dryer

[@NeilusNihilus]

That chest buster T Shirt is pretty awesome.

[@kaasutizardrawr883]

That chest burster tee is awesome.

[@fupamastah9331]

The intro audio was missing in the first one, for all of those asking

[@pocketchicken8212]

Yeah but why the re-upload?

[@bobodahoboaks]

Bing Bong The Archer To put the audio in, come on dude.

[@8bpspfreak2]

The intro music is a solid core element of Ashens, can't leave it without audio!

[@AbiRizky]

Bing Bong The Archer because dooo-dood dooo-dood doo-dood

[@AnonyMoose2012]

I honestly thought the Killer Croc mask was of a goomba from the Super Mario Bros. Movie . . . I can’t be the only one!

[@NathanielParonto]

"OH MY GOD! It's um.. Killer Croc from Suicide Squad, what a film that wasn't" LMFAO!

[@doubtfulguest5450]

Finally! It's about time that you changed that tacky Union Jack cushion cover.

[@ggjiggle6926]

I love that coin from sea of thieves you got in the geek gear. Would love to get hold of one. Might have to scour eBay for one somebody didn’t want.

[@MAXLAWLESSIBIZA]

Worlds most dangerous drinking game.... take a shot every time Ashens takes a loud intake of air.

[@schadenfreudebuddha]

whoa, I've got that same Zelda map artwork on my wall, but it was in the form of a puzzle

[@PixelOverload]

Personally i'd be super hyped for that Hyrule map, it could chill with my Middle Earth and Skyrim maps. Oh shit, those Xenomorph+Predator cushion covers are dope af.

[@darkax4199]

Watched this video after the Norwich Gaming quiz so I was blissfully unaware that you'd be hosting. Was a nice surprise ^^

[@Nordorf]

Dear Ashens.. You may wonder if its worth doin these videos, and you may think "is anyone still interested in this crap?" Thing is.. i watch these videos. I watch you open the junk from lootcrate so i don't have to. You have saved me alot of cash. I used to subscribe to that crappy thing, but since i found out that i get the same "high" from watching others open and comment the trinkets from the boxes, i unsubbed from lootcrate. I have never needed a "lootcrate exclusive" item. It's just been the surprise factor, and thanks to you i no longer have to waste my money on buying this junk. Therefore.. please continue this unboxing thing. Sure it's crap. Sure it's throwing money out the window to get some cheap funko-crap back.. but atleast it's not my money.

[@zackku]

Damien McDallydally can we copystrike ashens 'video ?

[@seventhstudofaseventhstud8037]

This is so inspiring 😭👏

[@jimmymcgill2961]

Ashens loses 0 money in making these videos. He doesn’t even tamper with half the items he unboxes so he can flip it for a fortune on eBay.

[@CuriosityRocks]

Ooh I like the style of the Frodo figure 😍🤗

[@GreatSageSunWukong]

That iron man sheet of metal, does that genuinely come with a one sided magnet with a sticky backing, or is it magnetic on both sides, like the fridge magnet it so obviously is?.

[@Donteatacowman]

I feel like Frodo is just begging for some doll-customizing touch-ups. Looks good but some shading and detailing would push it over the edge into great.

[@otopugpug]

My man Ashens rocking that EDF shirt

[@Redmoonblade]

You always have the scum bar theme stuck in your head, you just become so used to it that it stays in the back until someone hums it or talks about it.

[@broccoliface4501]

Sounds like Ashens had recently seen Ahoy's latest documentary on Monkey Island

[@Dreadjaws]

Well, I mean, who hasn't?

[@jakedavies1393]

Ashens killing the KZbin game since day 1 🔥

[@iamdb1990]

more hmms please

[@lasarousi]

iamdb1990 hmmm.

[@IanC14]

Hmm. Mmm. Huh.

[@TheFanofmanythings1]

I saw it up Ashens, I saw you take it down, and now you're covering it up!

[@techbaffle]

*The intro music has returned!*

[@nerdicorgi]

The "I love horses" cutaway caught my offguard and made me legitimately laugh out loud for the first time in a long time. Kudos, editor.

[@halcifer1563]

"Mariah Orc" Issa skinny legend

[@Clarissa_Star]

Well, of course Infinity War is in there. Latest trend sells and stuff...

[@betamax80]

You have "I love horses" on cue? I salute you!

[@SlytherinReviews]

I like that Sea of Thieves Coin it would go well next to my Space Jam coin, you know the one that you got with the VHS back in the 90's and yes I still have that coin

[@Lolbama2012]

Wow, they sent you the actual mask they used for Croc in Suicide Squad

[@LorcianKouyou]

Did there used to be a sub box thing that you could enter your interests and they'd personalize it for you?

[@shellbacksclub]

The Norwich Union Pub Quiz.... 😐 Better call the Royal Guard to help keep the crowd down! 😉

[@Ka0s42]

The guy that played Killer Croc (Adewale Whatshisface) also played Mr. Eko in Lost. So yeah, really great Hollywood career.

[@Horcrux_maker]

Also Adebisi in oz

[@MarkUpcraft]

The map isnt from any of the Zelda games, its based on Ocarina of Time's overworld but its vastly expanded.

[@keiyakins]

Yeah, it looks to be a mashup mostly of OoT and Minish Cap?

[@koeimaster]

I got a Geek Gear box at comic con last week, was full of mostly crap except one of those Sea of Thieves coins which is really cool and a nice Ravenclaw print. Came with 4 bloody pins (one Goku head, two Harry Potter and South Park)

[@CookingWithCows]

I think the Loot Crate box can be folded into an infinity gauntlet. Were there no instructions? If you unravel the box and put it together inside out, you should end up with a boxy "glove" thing. On the black side of the box is a breakout part which I guess can be used like a handle inside the glove to hold it.

[@anonarchist1936]

Flat right angled surfaces are usually very detectable by radar, hence the 'weird' shape of stealth planes.

[@RoninCatholic]

Hawkeye was always my favorite Avenger as a kid.

[@CasualUnboxing]

Awesome Unboxing Ashens, I just got mine in, I thought the T-shirt was a little too Cartoonish, Big fan of your channel, been watching for years with my personal account. This is my first comment from my new account. Thanks for sharing, I like your style, you're funny and entertaining.

[@olivercroker6668]

The alien and predator designs on those cushion covers are from the second alien versus predator

[@daimenworrall]

I watch to play the "guess if clive, a troll or chef excellence" game at the end.

[@CuriosityRocks]

I love the cartoon Thanos shirt 😍

[@CaptainDeadBugs]

Is that an Earth Defense Force t-shirt that you're wearing? :O

[@kylecerneka8964]

stu have you thought of trying brick loot? its the same monthly box but everyting in it is lego compatiable building bricks and stuff.

[@darkfent]

I wish we got more of em' creepy talking dolls segments

[@MCOmegaX123]

Do we now assume that Ashens is going to turn to the Dark Side soon? He's already not liking sand because it's coarse and rough and irritating and gets everywhere... It's over, Ashens! I have the high ground!

[@Why156]

Ashen forgot his knife 😱😱THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED!

[@Cukeasaurus]

I've been Deagonosti'd and I'm not happy about it. Damn you, Ashens!

[@rjkmusicmedia]

You seem to get a lot of zumba, pirate shanty's stuck in your head, Ashens! Or was it an abstract theme song from an old television show you mentioned last time.. I'll never know..

[@grfrjiglstan]

And suddenly ashens was the top post of /r/prequelmemes.

[@biscuitsalive]

Can’t believe Netflix is doing the dark crystal! Expect the worst. But hope for the best I think on that one.

[@ZacHawkins42]

biscuitsalive As long as there are no gender-fluid Keflings we should be okay.

[@wiibrockster]

biscuitsalive Well their Voltron reboot is good. The Dark Crystal might turn out good too

[@Dragoseye]

gelfling*? and honestly? I wouldn't care personally. Their race was wiped out by the skeksis anyways so you wouldn't freaking even know. Only two where left alive as far as the original story went, and that was by accident. Now, if they change that fact then they are majorly fucking up the story line right there. Unless you mean podlings which honestly probably were already genderfluid and easy going to begin with.

[@bucwhovian8305]

If it's Netflix there is always a chance it will be good. The thing I've noticed is there shit is pretty easy to spot from the trailers and first few minutes so checking it out is pretty low risk.

[@biscuitsalive]

Yep, loads of good netflix content, but when they tinker with childhood memories like Dark Crystal, its very hard for them to get it right.

[@skywolfx76]

I was just waiting for Stuart to make a starwars reference when he kept complaining about the sand lol

[@truckerallikatuk]

That frodo looks like the version from the rotoscoped movie... reference for the truly ancient amongst us.

[@ghostmarine3608]

holy crap i want dat cushion covers ! :D them things look metal the do!

[@Bunny-bt3be]

i haven’t seen any comments about how cute him singing betty boops song was

[@jojotronJoseph]

Do you get your amazing mystery boxes form the tv and movie shop near the forum?

[@singaporesammy]

Black Widow on that Geek Gear shirt looks like Dot Matrix from Spaceballs.

[@Samizdata]

"Gelflings mean end of Skekis!" Also the one on the first card was a Mystic.

[@TheForeignCitizen]

I need that Frodo in my life! :o

[@leonb8991]

I know what this lootbox needed: an inflatable crown!

[@BodywiseMustard]

Frodo seemed to be based on the cartoon film (70s?)

[@judojamie379]

just because i haven't see any comments the map is an amalgamation of all the games plus the deku tree was in breath of the wild

[@char_gards]

Judo Jamie not in that position thougj

[@DragonNexus]

Yeah I figured the same. It's kinda OoT with the Skulltula and the Stalchild design, but there's also the floating islands from Skyward Sword and the positioning of certain landmarks looked off, so I just assumed it was a mish-mash of stuff

[@Dragoseye]

it's a mash up of termina and hyrule. it says so on the paper ashens holds up for a moment that tells you what you got in the box. Which confused me terribly. because that's not how that shit works.

[@Dragoseye]

i don't think that was the skylands.. the paper says it had a map of termina and hyrule. I think that's the ruins were the stone tower is.

[@7Marx7]

i suppose, but by doing so, it's not really accurate to any of the games.

[@hatandbeardmedia5925]

"I love horses, they're my friends"

[@CaskettTV]

Dude is that an EDF T-shirt? Great taste.

[@TheReamoEmo]

amazing mystery boxes just got all the left over stuff from hmv, ive seen all that shit in there so many times

[@kashmirquinn1436]

Aw ashens I'm very interested in the dark crystal card set! I absolutely love them. Could I have them please!?

[@BOYD1981]

My 4 year old daughter loves The Dark Crystal, too bad I don't do Loot Crate because I'd actually have a use for those cards.

[@DragonUltraMaster]

Didn't expect his last word to be "Creepy" but I accept!

[@BoogyMushrooms]

Just a heads up you might want to drop a Tweet extra out about the video. KZbin didn't drop me a notification for this despite having all of them enabled.

[@Fragenzeichenplatte]

dolos It's not in your subscriptions?

[@catbank]

Somebody is right now hanging a framed Zelda map on his basement wall.

[@lalalandd123]

im pretty sure every single lootbox has "gone away for a bit but is back now"

[@10tonhamster]

Getting a Marty Feldman vibe from that Frodo.

[@MHArcadia]

Can't tell if the BB-8 cushion is actually filthy or if it's just a convincing color job...

[@i_kemp_bush9523]

I wish you would have put the lootcrate box inside out for a boxy infinity gauntlet

[@szasstamblr2869]

"You like Dr. Who? AND you have feet?"

[@GmodPlusWoW]

I imagine the box bag was probably handled by Tusken Raiders at some stage.

[@fishpop]

Sand in a box that looks like the Infinity Gauntlet? I think you should check if any Spiderman merch has disappeared from your Bag Of Crates.

[@SammyRenard]

Man, that couch's seen better days There should be a GoFundMe for the couch's restoration!

[@jimmymcgill2961]

Ashens can afford a new couch if he wants to. We don’t need to throw our money at him.