r/AmiTheA**Hole For RUINING Games Night With My Troubled Past?

[@sheilaclemett4353]

The first story: I don't know when those "icebreaker" games first appeared but I despise those. They are so popular among people like Matt who get off on finding out things they can be cruel about. The story about the man walking out on his sick wife: He's the worst kind of cad. She's not an incubator for his progeny and he would be likely to walk out once she has baby weight to lose.

[@markedwards3647]

re "what is the worst thing you have ever done?" Opens the door to rich and disgusting imagination. Fantasy of torture, dismemberment, composting, and scattering remnants of an enemy come to mind. Choose cheating lover, or HOA president (much more deserving) as imagined victim.

[@WhitneyDahlin]

I know this is an old comment but Matt made me too angry to not comment. MATT made HIMSELF look bad. No one else.

[@kennarose783]

Flat shoes for women are perfectly acceptable at a white tie event. The requirements are a long evening gown and nice jewelry, with optional long gloves. For men it's a coat with tails, white waistcoat and bow tie, cufflinks and shined black shoes. A bit too restrictive imo, black tie would be a bit more relaxed.

[@badkitty4922]

Waistcoat.....are you in the UK? Not making fun AT ALL. I'm American and here we call them vests. I really like the term waistcoat better, and have used it since I first heard it, (when I've remembered to). Sorry. Off topic, I know. I just got tickled for a moment.😊😘😘💖💖

[@kennarose783]

@@badkitty4922 I'm Canadian and generally we call them vests too, but I also prefer the term waistcoat.

[@___LC___]

I would absolutely have to wear flats, as I broke my leg quite severely several years ago. I can’t wear heels anymore and a floor length gown would cover the shoes anyway.

[@serpentinewolf7085]

Not sure I’d even bother with jewelry.

[@franl155]

"You need to let me and my kids move into your house" - isn't it amazing that what someone else needs is really what YOU need? [] "Our dream of a family" - OUR dream? your dream, buddy, not hers. You wanted a baby machine; the moment you find out she can't lay eggs for you, you walk out on her at her most vulnerable, when she needed you the most.

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

I hate gate keeping cooking. If someone can recreate your secret recipe from scratch then good on them. I have many family held recipes and I wouldn't dare feel "upstaged" if someone served me something that was much tastier. In fact, I'd try to recreate THEIR recipe and tweak ti to be better and feed it back to them. Then they could try to one up me, and we could have a tradition of trying to improve on each other's recipe. Competition can be fun if everyone is a good sport. OP's BF's mother sounds like a /JUSTNOMIL in the making. Yeesssshhhh!!!

[@BruinPhD2009]

CJ and Auntie Yaya I’ve found some great websites during the pandemic and have told friends and family about the ones I really like. Mom needs to grow up.

[@Parasolhyena]

I wanna say OP's BF was really emotionally dumb though. My mum would be crushed if I said someone else's recreation of her dessert was better then hers. She wouldn't say anything but damn that shit would hurt anyone who loves to cook special things for there family. Like bro you can think it but unless you hate your mum don't say it to her face. MIL Super over reacted and OP did nothing wrong at all.

[@bun04y]

I have put my own spin on several of my MIL's recipes, she didn't have secret recipes. The main reasoning was because I used what ingredients that I had on hand. The secondary reason was so that her recipes would be more special when we visited as they were hers. She died several years ago, and for the most part I still make her old recipes my way...because hubby prefers them the way I make them. oopsie! My grandmother had a secret recipe for cheesecake. She didn't intend for it to be a secret, but no one had asked for it because we just wanted her to make it. When we started asking for her recipe she at first didn't give it out to my mom's side of the family because she didn't want my mom to have it (big huge fight)...then grandma got dementia and threw the recipe out when she was decluttering. So now, no one has the recipe. I use a recipe that I found online...it is amazing. My mom says it isn't like grandma's, but I say...who cares? It is cheesecake!

[@trillionbones89]

Mozart was as child able to recreate a song that was forbidden to write down (while listening to it in church). He was congratulated for writing it down from memory. It's the "I'm not even mad, that's amazing" attitude people should have with this.

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

@@trillionbones89 - Sadly, I think religion gave some people the feeling of power over each other so they could "forbid" arbitrary things. And of course the church made writing forbidden to the poor, because only ignorant and uneducated masses are easily controlled through fear and superstition.

[@queensaladini6731]

Omg imagine being diagnosed with ovarian cancer and having your future plans ripped away, and when your husband finds out he leaves you alone to suffer the pain ALONE...... thats not a relationship.....

[@josemadera3138]

Imagine begging ur significant other for kids and a family to be turned down for years then to be told ull never have kids that women is horrible

[@minxx.]

@@josemadera3138, ??

[@lilywong9672]

@@josemadera3138 Incel bitch

[@ResidentMilf]

@@josemadera3138 Did you forget that adoption exists? Women aren't incubators; we're human beings who deserve to have a say over what happens (or doesn't happen) to our bodies. What in the actual hell is wrong with you?!

[@josemadera3138]

It's not about being an incubator it's about that horrible women like yourself that just wasted a man's life there's no rewinding time if she knew he wanted a family and agreed to having said family when they got married she just wasted his life. You are delusional if u think adoption is the same it's not and that's not to say it's a bad thing but it's not the same lol I bet ur pro choice but ur also pro child support hu

[@mellodees3663]

"I know the recipe for water..." 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Kati_P]

H20 (oops I leaked the recipe lol) 🙃

[@pequenaesposa3286]

😂 oml I died laughing!

[@LINKINPARK262]

Husband likes to use ice but won't make any. I keep asking if he forgot the recipe.

[@SweetLilyofPeace]

Haha I know the cookie one was ridiculous. A grown woman behaving like that. Also the son was being a bit of an a/hole winding her up. However that mother is irrational. I question though why this person went all out looking for the recipe. It is good that it was only at home. As long as it was not one upmanship as that perhaps was the mil's thing. She got compliments for it and it became a family tradition. Yes the mil overreacted but I don't think this is solely about cookies. What were the motives behind searching it out, was it just because she loved them so much and just wanted to do at home. I hope so but it was the son that started the furore.

[@rinpaisys]

@@SweetLilyofPeace I mean, it sounds to me like she and her boyfriend just really liked them and given the pandemic, they could no longer get them from his mom, and she started baking and figured “maybe I can find something similar” because they probably missed a treat they both really enjoyed. Turned out to be an existing thing that lots of people make, she decided to make her own version, and that was that.

[@DedraAmbroseandSnow]

My husband & I were married for 18 yrs together 19 yrs. When he passed away in 2016 @ 52 yrs old. I was his only wife & he was my only husband. I'm engaged now but I've not gotten married yet. So it is possible to be married till death do you part.

[@kirstenornelas881]

My parents would have been married 25 years, my mom for sure never even dated before my dad and I think it was the same for dad but idk for sure. He passed away suddenly at only 48 years old though. Then my grandpa would follow 8 months after on what would have been my parents 25th. You can stay till death do you part so long as you are a team and work through the hard times as well as the good times. Congrats on your new engagement and I am also sorry for your loss.

[@victoriajohnson4420]

My husband says that "till death do you part" originated back when the average life expectancy was 35, and most people didn't travel more than 7 miles away from home. He has made this joke for a few decades now, and we still laugh about it. Best wishes for your new marriage!

[@hwiley8141]

Deirdra, I dont know how, or even if, to private message ? Can I ask how you met your fiance ? Also looking to get back into the dating scene, but havent dated since before cell phones were a thing.

[@DedraAmbroseandSnow]

@@hwiley8141 my name is spelled Dedra. I met him online, I not ashamed of how we met. He got brain cancer last yr & is dying. So he broke up with me and moved to spend his remaining days with his family. Yea I still love him very much and miss him like crazy.

[@DedraAmbroseandSnow]

@@kirstenornelas881 thanks hun. Sadly my now ex-fiance has brain cancer and is dying. He broke up with me and moved to live with his family for his remaining days.

[@TheIronwil]

1st Story: NTA, not even a little bit. I went through things as a child and teen that most people couldn't even imagine. Definitely NOT the kind of thing I'd share at a party with someone I've never met. Matt's snarky, condescending comment was out of bounds by a country mile. People shouldn't assume things they don't know about others. This is like when some activist is arguing with someone and demands to know if they've been sexually assaulted. First, don't f*cking assume the person you're talking to couldn't have suffered sexual assault - you don't know. On top of that, what kind of entitled AH demands that kind of information from a complete stranger?

[@catpoke9557]

Plus, even if that WAS the hardest thing he had actually been through, he has no right to needlessly bring someone down for having a relatively easy life! What's the problem with being happy? And, moreover, ALL hardships are hardships. Maybe the hardship doesn't compare to others, at least in the case of most people, but for one people respond to situations differently, meaning an 'easy' thing can be a truly terrible thing to another- and for two, all hardships matter even if they're smaller ones. People will always have it harder than you, no matter what. That doesn't mean your struggles don't matter- they DO. So either way, Matt really needed to think things through.

[@TheIronwil]

@@catpoke9557 I'll admit that moving to a place where he didn't know anyone does not, to me, seem to be too much of a hardship, but I agree with your meaning. Matt didn't have any right to make such a judgement... maybe OP had severe social anxiety and it actually WAS very difficult. Matt didn't know. But I'd have heard something like that at a party and blown it off, because I'd assume that there were probably worse things the person simply didn't want to share. That's so obvious it shouldn't even need to be explained, but assholes are assholes.

[@cianap.281]

@@catpoke9557 That's a good point. Besides, of the difficult things I've been through, the ones that look the worst "on paper" weren't necessarily the ones that were hardest for me.

[@lanadelrad6147]

exactly, in my sophomore year we had to tell about the hardest thing we went through, some people shared their loved ones dying, but the first thing that came to me was a lot of stuff, not just one, and they were all too much for anyone in that class to know, my friends or not. and to hard for me to share, i was already having a panic attack thinking about it. so i lied at said nightmares. i wasn’t going to tell them the actual truth, they didn’t need to know, i wasn’t comfortable sharing, and i didn’t want to be pitted or looked down upon or have to go to the nurse for freaking out.

[@UndeadEyes]

First, you can't 'own' a recipe that is well-known (excluding very specific circumstances with big companies and trying to claim/sell as your own creation). You can have your own style of it and keep it a secret, but people have rights to find similar recipes and do the same. If anything, the mom is the first one to steal as I doubt she just made it up off the top of her head... She found a recipe and edited to be to her taste. Second, I am going to make Carmelitas because they look amazing and there are a lot of recipes online on how to make them in different ways. Nom Nom.

[@alsinakiria]

Technically speaking, you can't copyright a recipe. You could sell a Big Mac in a restaurant for example and they couldn't sue though you can't call it that. Thing is, for a well known product like that you would have to show that you came up with it on your own. Still wouldn't be copyright, but they could claim corporate espionage which is a crime.

[@lolo-ve9rd]

She only did that because she's a b. She couldnt bake anything else.....no she purposely did this and it's rude and she's trying to create drama by bringing them to an event instead of just enjoying them. She's a b for so many reasons and she knew what she was doing.

[@curtisfranzen986]

Yes! I don't own many of my recipes. And pass them on. However, I reserve the right to pass them onto Family.

[@jam2727]

@@lolo-ve9rd She SAID she didn’t bring them to any events that the mother goes to. So far, she has only given them to her boyfriend.

[@lorirobinson7357]

@@alsinakiria not EXACTLY true. You can copy a recipe, but you can not sell the product for profit. Making it for personal consumption is not illegal.

[@atinyevil1383]

I’ve been through a situation similar to the first story. I was at a light-hearted event with people I knew, someone started saying sexist things about how men and ONLY men are stalkers, commit assault, kidnap women, are abusers, and are overall creepy. As someone who was raised by a single father who got me away from my abusive mother after she traumatized me, this rubbed me the wrong way. But because of the setting, I tried to talk the person down. I tried to be like “hey, women do these things, too, so maybe don’t shit all over all men”, but this person wouldn’t hear it and outright denied that a woman would ever do any of that and it was all men. At this point in her sexist rant, I’d had enough. The person who was in charge of the event wasn’t doing anything to stop her, no one else was willing to tell her to knock it off, so decided to say “well my mother tried to kidnap me out of spite after my father was awarded custody, so.” This shut her up. This shut everyone up. The mood of the event was changed and I just left. The person who was in charge of the event was then asked a mutual friend of ours to come “talk to me” because I was making people feel bad. I don’t blame my friend because I don’t think she knew about what happened and was just told that I was bringing the mood down. But I stopped being around those people after that.

[@kitsumekat]

If I was you, would have laid the whole history down until she had years in her eyes before leaving. Never let someone Invalidate your trauma like that.

[@atinyevil1383]

kitsumekat at the time, I didn’t want to cause drama, but looking back at how I was treated anyway, I really should have. This was a group of people who were all about having safe spaces and not triggering people or being hateful. And while most people respected my background, I should not have let this person trample all over it.

[@kitsumekat]

@@atinyevil1383 I hope you are doing better now. :)

[@atinyevil1383]

kitsumekat thank you. I’m not friends with a lot of the people from that group anymore and found some better people to talk to.

[@ResidentMilf]

I'd have listed real-life popular examples that disproved her, like Casey Anthony, or that chick who sent over 65,000 text messages to this dude after one date. The idea that women are perfect angels that can do no wrong straight-up INFURIATES me.

[@asherael]

Saved a kid from starving to death homeless? NTA

[@bun04y]

And the mother & grandmother are NOT going to make an introverted kid become extroverted, no matter what they do. The best you can hope for is accepting everyone for who they are. Aunt is NTA, she is a hero.

[@Ann_Wall-Chiasson]

I had a friend in high school who pulled a simple prank on me by offering me gum that turned out to be a joy buzzer. We had a good laugh at that one.

[@midnightserenity9797]

Okay, as for the Schizophrenic one: My maternal grandmother was a Schizophrenic. She was diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia, and she started going through it when her parents died, but she went into a full psychosis whenever her husband, my Papa, passed away when I was six years old. She was a horrible person. She kidnapped my older sister and tried to pass her off as her daughter, she let her parents abuse my mom and her four brothers, and she called the police on us multiple times for things she was hallucinating and constantly lied. Now, she was a horrible person, and none of us were sad to see her pass away, but we would never, and I repeat, NEVER do something like that to her. Whenever she was going through a manic attack or psychotic episode, we'd calmly explain to her that she wasn't in danger and that she was having hallucinations. We may have hated her, but we would never deliberately make her feel like she was crazy. Because of her treatment, I have a fear of Schizophrenics. I understand that it is absolutely not their fault and that it is a mental disorder, but I was traumatized by my grandmother, and trauma is trauma. I've never been able to interact with a functioning Schizophrenic. I nearly had a panic attack whenever I had a man come into a restaurant I worked at when I was 16, he was from the mental hospital across the street. They deemed him safe to be driven to the restaurant, but none of my managers or coworkers thought to warn me that he was Schizophrenic, and I was terrified when he was talking to someone that wasn't there. They finally let me know of his mental disorder, and I nearly cried. Of course, I still served him and gave him good service, and then handed him our phone so he could call someone to take him back to the mental hospital. My manager apologized to me, and my other coworkers were informed and they let him sit in one of their sections. Now don't get me wrong, he was a very kind and sweet old man that could eat enough to feed a large family, but as I said, trauma is trauma. But what those people did to their "friend" is disgusting. They shouldn't have had to explain their mental illness just so they could be treated as a human being. They should be treated as a human being nonetheless. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[@asherael]

She wasn't accusing you of homophobia, she was using homophobia as an example ot try and relate to you. You're still 100% in the right, she sounds awful

[@protoskeeper]

I think the only two cases where I would not be furious with someone reading someone else's diary are: - the child who wrote it has been kidnapped / is missing for a longer time - the person is dead And the only one where it is really okay to read it: - consent from the person

[@forestspell]

NTA. I no longer loan out *anything* to *anyone*. Not my books, clothes, jewelry, accessories. NOTHING. Because people don't respect them and then act like its no big deal when they damage or lose them or don't return them. And I especially learned that those that don't accept "No" with grace are EXACTLY the ones that will be a problem borrower.

[@lianav707]

Re lap hopper: She saw signals because she wanted to. Period. you are not the Ahole. YOUR girlfriend is so cool.

[@like2btree]

Kicking out a 16 year old is illegal. He's a minor. My mother did that to me multiple times as a child, and that's legally considered child abandonment.

[@mog-gyveroneill2500]

You doing ok now?

[@thechosenone9769]

I am an infertile women. I went through menopause at about 16. I sort of understand why the guy who is upset that he won't be able to have kids with his wife anymore. I'm single but if I could just not date a specific person that I was really into to be able to have kids, I 100% would. It's not easy and often not possible for people to adopt or receive infertility treatments. There are a lot of kids in foster care but they are not available for adoption and the ones who are have mental illnesses including Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and that is a disorder that causes an inability to become attached. It can be helped but not cured. That's a big issue to deal with. It's also extremely painful to know you missed the first 5-17 years of your child's life. And that's if you are able to get a child at all as there are not a lot available for adoption. Infertility treatments are EXTREMELY EXTREMELY expensive with no guarantee. Only 15 states have any kind of requirements for insurance companies to cover infertility treatment and Wisconsin is not one of them. Unless you have someone who is willing to become your surrogate it's going to cost like 100k. Domestic adoption is 40k-60k (apparently we still effectively sell babies.) Foreign adoption is 22k at the lowest and that was YEARS ago. That is prohibitively expensive for MOST people. With this guy he DID already marry the girl and that means forever. He just found out some DEVASTATING news. Being angry is how he feels and he has the right to feel it but shouldn't direct it at his wife. If his wife is making really good money (since she focused on her career) he has a lot more options. He is absolutely TAH but lots of people are AHs when they are in extreme pain. I can't excuse him thinking that she won't be a woman anymore. I don't get that. A lot of infertile women struggle with not feeling like a real woman as it is. I don't get that but part of the reason I am still single is because I don't want to shove this pain on someone I'm supposed to care about and my last relationship ended because he has a criminal record from over 12 years ago. I don't agree with him. He IS TAH. I just understand how he feels and most people think it's MUCH MUCH easier than it is.

[@GeorgeHope10154]

Nephew gets kicked out of house for not being social with family members and family friends... Hmmm, I wonder why he doesn't like spending so much time with his family. They seem so nice. 🙄

[@jgw5491]

Yeah, I really liked point #4: be happier and outgoing. Puke!

[@danrossell6375]

In regards to Ms. Polyamory. It sounds like she has 5 other beds that she can be occupying. Tell her she can go occupy one of them!!

[@sandrabrogdon3784]

men just have a hard time recognizing when a girl is flirting with them and not flirting with them because I knew a girl that was literally pressing her breasts in my boyfriend's face and he didn't even realize that she was coming on to him until I said something to him and he started to realize the signals. I didn't worry about her coming on to him because I knew he had nothing for this girl or anyone else. I always told people he wouldn't cheat on me if even if he was in a room full of naked women. He's just not that type he doesn't even believe in 1 night stands.most people would not believe this and call me naive but they do not know this man.

[@kristy6703]

Crazy girls like that who cry over something so dumb as not being able to sit a guys lap that you like, are emotionally unstable. She needs therapy to help her recognize the signs of someone being really interested in her, processing her emotions, and communicating without being a drama queen. gusy are often clueless when they are in a happy healthy relationship

[@patchz2531]

The mom and sister that kicked the nephew out and told him to find a new home... hey they should be happy he did what they asked. He found a new and better home. You are not the A hole. Parents can be over bearing and threatening the loss of a home and family because their child refuses to knuckle under? They are abusive and he was smart to go to where he is loved for himself and not as a possession. Good luck

[@lovelyjunk7048]

The recipe one. I remember asking some serious crocheters online if that's fine to recreate an item that has a paid masterclass, using just a photo of the finished work legally available online, if I have no opportunity to purchase. I was told, as long as I do as much as credit the original author, no one is going to care, because crocheting from the photo of finished product is not easy, and requires some experience. So, I am basically putting a lot of work into that and not stealing anything. That's the same.

[@kristinwiebold2433]

The mom and grandma kicked the teen out. Going to a relative's house sounds like the smartest thing. My mind isn't sure about whether he was being disrespectful or not to his mom.

[@rannvamacdonaldarnskov4794]

The problem with the "demanding paternity test" post is that nowhere has there been stated that there are hints that the kid wouldn't be their grandchild. There is not information about if she had a relationship close to this one or if they have had problems with her cheating, they are purely basing this on the fear of her being a golddigger because they consider her of lower class than themselves. They can't deny that this is gonna affect the relationship with the girl from now on regardless of what the test would show.

[@bluejaywoman3421]

1st story, what I would have said if I was OP, “was it ok for Matt to try and make me look bad?”

[@luvondarox]

The Irrational Cookie Mom came across a bit hysterical, but that cookie recipe could have been the one thing she was good at making that was _hers_ alone, that she felt her family would come together and to her to enjoy, not unlike the OP from a while back that homemade essentially their own version of the Tollhouse cookie recipe. It would have been a shock alone to find out that either her exact or a very similar recipe was available online, and that OP _improved_ it, at least in her son's eyes. Suddenly her signature dish (which, depending on the generation or culture, is a _big effin' deal_ ) is just... nothing. It's not special anymore, it's not even pinnacle. That would be a massive ego / self-worth bomb. Especially if it's one of those families who pride themselves on food. I think ESH, to a degree. Momma slightly for not wanting to share the recipe (though food secrets run strong in my family, so I completely understand that), moreso for her panicked, aggressive outburst, OP very slightly for doing what literally the rest of us would have done (😅), but mostly for OP's BF for ratting OP out and saying "hers are better than yours, Momma!" Like... nah, child. That is not something you just say, especially to someone regarding their prized recipe. 🤣 That boy either has no tact, or never had to worry about the consequences, lol. That's a solid "shots fired" in my clan, man. It's gonna be a heck of a road to rebuild, but I'm hoping OP and Momma working in the kitchen together to make something truly badass will help bring them back together.

[@bridgeforthesheep]

I like your solution of them coming together and making something together. I do feel bad for cookie mama. I love baking and making things for my loved ones, and there is a sense of pride behind being able to do it, so if I were to get a call saying that x person's pecan pie was better than mine, I'd probably cry a little.

[@reme001]

Guy who told mother that cookies were better than his mother's-uh oh. Son made a mistake.

[@Roedygr]

Laura falsely thinks OP is blocking her from her kids who want to see her.

[@amandarose4469]

First one, they should be thankful I was not playing. NTA.

[@badkitty4922]

Right? Same here. I would've left them traumatized with the truth.😉😊

[@joycedennis7806]

Story: AITA for tell my best friend that I'm not happy for her - Since you got the so-called friend the job. Call & get her fired. Be vindictive & f her over as she clearly intended for you.

[@amusing4me257]

she has NO BUSINESS reading your diary. done period.

[@annvictor9627]

'Matt' deserved to feel bad for being a jerk. I think OP taught him a lesson. (I sure learned one the day I returned an urgent call from a friend and jokingly asked what was so urgent -- who died? Yes, someone we knew had. It was a suicide. I've never made that joke since.)

[@blondie7740]

Nephew kicked out, it is sad to say this is not abnormal. My house had a revolving door for kids who had troubled relationships with their parent/parents. My kids would bring them to our house because they knew they would be welcomed and safe until they could return home. And we had a few "regulars" that stayed for a week or more on a regular basis until things calmed down at home. My kids are grown now, and I always wished there was more I could do. Good on OP for opening her home and keeping her nephew safe.

[@bluejaywoman3421]

I would have to tell the bride and groom that because I have ankle issues and flat feet that need professionally made orthotics I can not wear heels (not will not wear heels) I would not be attending or I will be taking devil torture devices off my feet and will dance barefoot or not dance at all. Besides with a floor length dress who will see my shoes?

[@kitsumekat]

Usually heels are to prevent the dress from hitting the floor. But, a good tailor would prevent that.

[@tinydancer7426]

My mom made a dynamite potato salad ..... it was always a hit at family gatherings ...... s good in fact that my grandfather (her father) would always ask her to bring "her" potato salad when we would go to the farm for a visit. One holiday, when the majority of the families (aunts, uncles, cousins) were going to converge on the farm the same day, my mom decided to give my grandma a break and organized everyone to bring the major food items (a ham, a turkey, a roast beef ...... yeah, that many people, cold salads, chips, drinks, desserts, etc) Well, my grandfather made the wrong comment to my grandmother and ended up getting my mom in hot water ...... cuz granddad had told my grandma, "I hope she (my mom's name) brings her potato salad, cuz it is so much better than yours" ...... oh, did my mom get chewed out by grandma for making such a good potato salad ...... funny thing was, mom learned how to make potato salad from grandma (not that there was anything wrong with grandma's) only mom made it better ......

[@angeebear7690]

If the son believes it’s his baby, then it shouldn’t matter. This mom is way overstepping! Sad

[@___LC___]

Also, a paternity test before the child is born….an amniocentesis is high risk and most doctors won’t do it.

[@jasonwilson6062]

For the schizophrenia one its obvious someone in the group knew or found out and got the rest of the group to mess with you probably to ingratiate themselves with the group or had an issue with you!

[@krismartikris4834]

The first wedding - I just want to know how they are going to make people who had RSVP'd but don't attend, pay.

[@jgw5491]

Good luck trying to enforce that!

[@beegee1960]

She does not want extra room, she wants free rent, because I can guarantee, OP would never see a dime of rent money.

[@muhname6052]

The BFF who is dating the EX: yeah I'd start withdrawing support from her. Start by telling her boss that if they ever need or want to fire her go ahead because you're not friends anymore. See how long she can keep that good job without help

[@reme001]

To the aunt, thanks for taking care of your nephew. His family didn't even know where he was for 2 weeks!! Report them.

[@arleneroberts8886]

He didn’t want to say anything to hurt her, needed time to take in everything.

[@getcrafty8251]

The one about the 16yr old who got kicked out hurt me. Being a teen myself nd introverted nd socially awkward was a serious problem for my very extroverted family. On top of that I have selective mutism because of strong “discipline” like this (not getting kicked out but saying the wrong thing Nd such). Aunt is NTA. Absolutely amazing person, I would literally do the same as her if that happened to my nephew.

[@missyjune9014]

For the freeloading brother - " Here's your coat, There's the door....

[@MangaMarodon]

Me google Carmelita: Oooo, I need to make this

[@unavailabletoyu]

I have a similar story to the cookie one. My SIL has a “family recipe” that is a chicken dish. She cooked it for my family one weekend I was away at college. My family raved about for a while. I came home some time later and found a chicken dish recipe online. I showed it to my mom as I offered to cook it. She approved but mentioned it sounded similar to my SIL’s recipe. I made it and it was a huge hit. My mom made the comment it was like SIL but “ramped up.” Well, I went to social media and posted about dinner (as 18 year olds were known for at the time) and my mom’s compliment. I mentioned how she said it was similar to my SIL’s but “ramped up.” I was flattered that they liked it so much and compared it favorably to a dish they had practically written songs for. Well my SIL saw it and went off on me. My brother got in on it, too. Saying I had no right to make it and that an online recipe couldn’t be compared to a family one. Thankfully my mom had my back and just told me to ignore it. SIL hasn’t made the dish since and mine has been requested several times. It’s my boyfriend’s favorite dish of mine.

[@eowyneadig7879]

Country Girl that’s so idiotic that someone “needs” to acquire the “right” to cook a dish. 🙄

[@SweetLilyofPeace]

I think you were being a bit of a jerk (somewhat insensitive) not for making it but for posting your mum's comment. Bragging a bit and hurting someone else. You probably did in all innocence but you could have posted and said your mum liked it. Even better you could have given your sil credit for inspiring you to make it. See what I mean? It is not often what we do it is how we do and also often our motives for doing, our intent. We do not always have to be in competition with others :) I am sure you didn't mean to but that comment alone was the negative thing. You got carried away because you were happy with the comment and I am sure no ill intent. Perhaps just learn from it. I mean posting on social media and in effect one upping your sil publically like that, think about that part seriously and perhaps do not apologise for making it but for mentioning your sil. Hopefully meeting her half way you will mend your relationship with her and your brother. Just a life lesson :)

[@notajetplane]

I never get people who ask for something, then get angry when told no. With that attitude, they might as well just demand things, they would get the same results.

[@kirstenornelas881]

It is NOT FUNNY to mess with people who are struggling with mental health issues. This is crazy. Wow 3 freaking weeks! Those aren't friends and they have no idea how toxic and harmful they are as a group and individually. I'm sorry you went through all that at the hands of those who were supposed to be your support system not there to terrorize you.

[@vetaroberts3333]

He didn’t react good, but he is in shock

[@Mouthymensch]

2:02:41 for the roommate one, I have a similar story. I felt trapped in my college apartment room because my roommates constantly had their boyfriends over and in the common area. They ate all my food and ran up utilities. I was able to transfer my lease into an apartment for one person under the same management company, when I got back after winter break to move all my stuff I was met by one of the boyfriends that said “welcome back roomie” like nah I’m glad the movers were coming the next morning. Also they would be there when my roommates weren’t and would blast music while I was trying to study. I practically lived in my room. that’s also when I ate nothing but peanut butter and now I can’t stand the taste.

[@ogknightbro94]

57:19 that’s like saying I should get special treatment at Christmas since my birthday is only 4 days before Christmas

[@melissamiller7116]

The parents have every right to ask for a test since the sons wants their money.

[@bluejaywoman3421]

My parents were together for 52 years, until my father passed. My in-laws also were together until death.

[@maher.1510]

4th story..........did God gave op's bf's mom legal statement of F owning the cookies recipe???.…...she literally says:"you stole MY recipe"

[@heleneclark563]

For the girlfriend who found a similar cookie recipe to her boyfriend’s mom and improved it: NAHH!!! I’m thinking from the mother’s POV. This cookie recipe is her claim to fame in her family. It’s the one thing that keeps her son tied to her. She knows that her son is going to meet a woman that he wants to share his life with. But the fact that she can bake his favorite cookies. Now this woman that he loves bakes a cookie that it’s better than hers. She feels useless.

[@moirapledger9153]

Dude that's my exact story, except my sister was murdered, and we were absently playing DND, they were talking about potion effects and homebrewing, talking about drugging each other's characters, all knowing that my sister had a reputation for being an addict, hypothesizing about the bad trips, I finally had enough and piped up, "oh, we could hold a seance and ask my dead sister about it." Deadpan. We quickly got back on track with the quest and finished the session three hours later. I know I'm the asshole, I'll take the L, but Gabbi and her best friend were murdered in what looks like a home invasion over drug money only three weeks before this. I'm not sorry about it and that's why I know I'm the asshole.

[@rayopeongo]

(4) They wanted him to be more outgoing and happy. Yeah, kicking him out of the house will certainly help with that. That reminds me of a sign that a few folks used to have posted around our office: "Floggings will continue until morale improves".

[@wordforger]

OMG that icebreaker stuff. Hate it with a fiery passion. Had a theater teacher in high school that was all about "Oooh! draw on your emotions! Circle of trust!" And I hated every minute of that. She wanted us to share our deepest darkest secrets. I shared zilch. I didn't know that witch. The kids in my class mostly weren't friends. And I didn't want to have to talk about hiding from my stepdad when I could because of his nasty temper, and being forced to call the cops on him after his emotional abuse turned to physical abuse of my mother. Nor about the time I tied my door handle to my bed post to keep anyone from getting in when I heard screaming, a crash, and my mom crying in the living room. Or him kicking my door in while I was curled up terrified with my mother and learning as she wept and shouted at the bastard that my aunt had died. She hadn't figured out how to tell me yet and that was the way I learned. We'd dropped everything and moved away to that town I went to High School in to get away from him stalking us after my mom had finally worked up the guts to kick him out of her house. I have no idea what that lady thought she was doing trying to dig up our trauma like that. But she was not my favorite teacher in the least bit. It took me years to talk about that mess with ANYONE. I got sent to the school counselor and a social worker a couple times, but I never talked about it with them. Only after I made some friends online was I able to start opening up about it. Just... ugh. So freaking uncomfortable to be put on the spot like that, and should be a major faux pas for anyone.

[@Ecclectic_citcelccE]

@Markee You and OP ATA for that cookie description. LOL holy cow what a craving!!

[@germainesmith2940]

NTA BEST AUNT EVER your sister and mom should be a shame for putting him out in the street they are just evil and you did right thing taking him in call the authorities they do not need him back it will just make his life worst you are the better choice to care for him and dont let them bully you BRAVO OP

[@jenniferjimenez2146]

In regards to the cookie lady I'm imagining down the line. After she marries the boyfriend and having a child. One day the child asking why does gramma hate you so much and op saying " well long before you were born i made cookies" .😆

[@MadameMushroom]

Dress girl NTA, look it may seem tacky but Goodwill/second hand stores have amazing dresses. I got all my formal dresses that way. Never spent over 30$ on a dress and an entire ensemble I got once, with shoes, gloves, jewelry and a really beautiful hair pin was under 50$. The shoes cost the most because I had to get those brand new due to size.

[@vanessasorth1657]

My 29 year old son had an IEP, a DT, Therapy, PSR, Now CBRS, marital arts and some other things I forgot. He graduated in 2010, left in around 2011 or. 2013 never heard from him, now I think he might be dead. Lives in Bay Area.

[@kirstenornelas881]

You cave for the wedding with that woman and her kid guess what?.. You just gave her the green light to inject herself and her child into every wedding anniversary you will ever have

[@sandranoisewater6093]

Formal wear, for a wedding isn't, unusual, and people were told upfront. Wining about it after RVSP, is childish.

[@VeronicAM313]

As someone who's cousin was told that he was the daddy when we all told him to take the test and he wouldn't, I would say to take the test so there's no speculation. Ps, the baby wasn't his and he only found out when he caught her cheating after he came back home because he needed his work ID. 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@Falney]

"I don't understand girls" I don't think anyone does. Also. I would loan the money but have official contracts with interest. If they fail to pay, take them to court :)

[@taylorwiseman8078]

2:09:08 Apparently no one in this story remembered that you can't collect a dead person's debt. Unless the widow paid anything towards it, transferring it to her, it would be taken out of whatever there was of her husband's estate. She shouldn't have to worry about paying for it.

[@reme001]

Lady who was in accident- cut your bf off from the money. The vultures will certainly circle you forever. Rethink your relationship with this guy. He seems irresponsible.

[@jessicascoullar3737]

“When his family calls had him the phone and let him tell them no.” That is a terrible idea. He has already proven he can’t be trusted where saying no to his family is concerned. You just know he is going to cave and promise them her money.

[@noone8130]

If my parents in law demanded a paternity test id do it throw the letter in front of them and never talk to them again

[@sandranoisewater6093]

Move your money, boyfriend, deserves a lesson. Save it, for something you want/need. And think long hard about continuing a relationship.

[@afchicinfla]

What would sit heavily on me is all those people talking about me and what has happened in my life. People I don’t even know.

[@pnjkennedy1091]

Thanks for the daily affirmation!

[@sandrabrogdon3784]

Keep your account separate from his I would not trust him not to give that money to more family members. Also, you need that money for your own well-being since you were in a accident and out of work right now . $19,000 doesn't go that far and it will go quick. your boyfriend should have kept your secret like you asked and not told anyone anything about your money because it is your money and not his.

[@afchicinfla]

Keep someone down and depressed and wanting to work themselves out of it by helping you out it’s just so wrong

[@missterygirl16]

😂😂 the line about being stuck in the washing machine is hilarious especially because that's my go to for "adult videos" women btw. Not that it matters.😂

[@harelzilberstein7325]

dude I enjoy your content so much that I gave you the highest honor on youtube *subbing with all notifications* love your content and wish everyone well during these hard times!

[@lavenderhoney3208]

How is your head so far up your ..... I had laughed so hard. That was such a gold delivery

[@kaitlinsaide6897]

For the schizophrenia story, did it never occur to any of OP's friends that someone who actually "falls" for a prank like that probably has some serious things going on mentally? Someone who's healthy and confident in their thoughts and perception of reality would probably not be falling for it for so long. Schizophrenia or not, it's not a "prank" to do things that can legitimately screw with people's mental states.

[@reme001]

Op in the car- you're a good guy- NTA. Good wishes for your new relationship.

[@autumn557]

For the avacado-toe story. My friend had some gees tattooed on his knees. It’s cute.

[@forbinproject7174]

"What's the hardest thing you ever had to go thru?" What a stupid frikkin question to put in a game. I can instantly think of at least 2 dozen deeply negative examples that anyone would want to lie about experiencing. I also think it's not to hard to believe someone might be a bad liar when not wanting to mention a topic like that so I only give someone calling the OP out an ESHbecause it's politer to assume they don;t want to talk about it.

[@weirdestasmr5326]

Please please make ths next intro ITS-A-ME-A-MARKEE

[@dannaperlman335]

YES.

[@luvondarox]

🤣 I was not prepared to read that in Mario's voice. I died.

[@Fred100159]

BFF dateing her ex: she and he was most likely a 'thing' BEFORE you and he broke up.

[@susanlosey9511]

Take a dish of cookies over to her as a peace offering. Preferably your Carmel bars.❤😂

[@kessiawright1710]

The OP who made cookies is NTA. It is food. People try to make recipes they like. The BF mom wants to be the star. It's like those people who won't mentor younger people because they are afraid that they will either try to take their job or that they don't "know their place."

[@HelgaGrace2007]

So, my husband LOVES lemon cookies. I went through 3 recipes, and I picked and chose what parts of which recipe I loved, and then added to it. To make my very own lemon cookie recipe. I made them for coworkers, and one keeps asking me for my recipe. I said "nope, it's all mine and when I write a cookbook, you can then have it." That being said, if she went home and found recipes and tweaked them, then it doesn't make it MY cookies anymore, it then makes them hers.... P.s. I get my recipe secrecy from my mom, who makes the most amazing fruitcake and to this day will not share her recipe with me.... so I come by it honestly.

[@kirstenornelas881]

Wtf it isn't on the kids b day ffs hell no she ain't taking over my wedding is what I would say. Smh

[@susanminer2088]

If son wants them to support her, get the test.

[@lpm67]

Hubby with sick wife. Sir, you are allowed to be in shock and grieve the loss of your fantasy family. Now put on your big girl knickers, man up and be there for your wife. Apologize for running off, explain you were in shock but shouldn't have left her, and tell her you love her and that she's going to be alright and you'll not abandon her again and live up to being her man.

[@judyjohnson9610]

I should read more comments before throwing my own in. I added a couple of the points you mentioned. Well put.

[@SweetLilyofPeace]

@@judyjohnson9610 It is ok you are allowed to make your point. Reasonable people often have similar comments :)

[@debbiejoanhill1760]

Op why hasn’t anyone questioned if Ashley did this to the father of her daughters!

[@TessuDraws]

Tattoo story: If OP already has multiple tattoos and her husband HATES tattoos then... How are they even married?

[@Shenn3165]

If the cookie momma was a real adult she would apologize and they could work on the cookies together. Obviously the op would have to be able to go along with the plan.

[@wickedgreen1784]

The "mansplaining midwife" post needed some details about the timing and tone of the conversation, ie; did he interrupt, sound judgemental, condescending or patronizing? Or did he interject with a professional and compassionate: "Well, you aren't alone in worrying that intercourse could harm your fetus! A large part of my practice as a Nurse-Midwife is maternal health education... and good news! Intercourse during a normal pregnancy is totally safe for as long as it is still comfortable for the woman... however, also on the topic of prenatal safety... the most current research on fetal-alcohol-syndrome has determined that there is no 'safe' level of alcohol for pregnant women to consume...have you had the chance to talk with your practitioner about healthy pregnancy strategies? There's a lot of outdated/ misinformation floating around these days..". etc. etc TLDR: To determine who, if anyone, ITA here: It's not just 'what' he said, but 'how' he said it that matters, because no one likes being told that what they are doing sucks (whether they knew it or not) and in this particular case the intentions of both parties are the same: protecting an unborn baby

[@vanessasorth1657]

I have a son who is over 29, but when he was younger he left my home. He when he left he told me I never helped with some protection, needs for his disability. His 'friends ' he met on 2nd life convinced him I did nothing for him. Am I The abut.

[@lyrigageforge3259]

I am female. The girl in this story who does not handle the rejection very well some how reminds me about a type of a man. I met my now husband in a social game, we both are gamers and in that particular game you can create everything from the environment to your avatar - there is not really any aim in the game, so people make loads of things, they create clothing for the avatar, avatar shapes, skins and so on shops, clubs and a lot more. The game also has rather wide adult side to it. This would mean, that having an attractive female avatar would pretty much attract men like flies. And this one kind of a man type - simply did not know how to take a no. I don't mean someone who starts to insult you - but the kind who will just try over again and harder. And when you make it pretty much public information that you have someone and are not interested in anyone - it is like some kind of a lure. So I ended up collecting, copying their messages sent to my character on note cards. Like this one dude trying to describe all these sexual things which he would not even attempt to do to my character, listing on and on - while I am finding 1001 ways to tell him NO, NEVER - ABSOLUTELY NOT! I found it hilarious. Really strange, I always thought that they don't even know what I look like in reality, never would. I got that they wanted some written sex - but when someone clearly is not interested, why the hell did they try so hard. Besides I and my man we were there cause it allowed us to create stuff, like textures and items or clothing for the avatars, for that fun. And no - it is not like social media where people float around stupidly with their real lives. Only very stupid people would allow someone to gain any real information bout themselves. All though eventually one will learn more about people if one knows them for a long time. That's how it was bit different with my now husband, because we knew each other over this game and some other games like over two years before we ever even met. But even before we met, I was so enjoying my time with him, that there was absolutely no way some dude could lure me - so I found it honestly hilarious for some time until it just became boring as hell. Just too much attention, yak. Regardless - the notable thing is, that through all this time, I shared all those note-cards of those laughably weird discussions with my now husband. His character has a collection of them - to some of those dudes I even told that I would share their silly foolishness with him, that he collects them and laughs his ass of. I was just really annoying, I would absolutely rub my now husband in their faces. He saw me rejecting men left and right - and now we are together for life. Still - I don't quite understand men - like that man says he does not understand women. Ok I also passed few women that did actually behave a bit like the one described in this video - she did not get it even after rejecting her several times (I am not lesbian), and trying to explain I looked at us just as friends. Then she tried to claim that we were lovers in past life and I don't believe that kind of spiritual crap anyways - so I just wanted to call quits on the friendship and then she exploded like some dammed brat. And no I don't find her any better or worse than those men who just do not get that a no is a no. Why the hell they got so insanely persistent about it when they were ALWAYS told about my boyfriend (now husband) and how absolutely lovely, perfect and wonderful my man is at any turn of the word! It was pretty much my go to defense really - I did not allow them to tell me anything 'nice' about them selves without over ruling the bragging tendency with something far better. Or then it is a cultural thing around the world, cause in my culture no is NO, no matter what - end of the story. I am positive that character of mine has a folder of tens, and tens of such conversations. But then I just began to ignore all male characters - completely. It got eventually boring, like reading the same lyrics of a same song over again. And so, these days - while I and husband still go playing there, to make our stuff and have our own fun - I never even reply with a hello to any a male character. Just not a beep. And while that is not maybe polite towards the normal ones - I am sick of the persisting bricks. But the saint my husband is - then again, he knows for the fact there is no man out there who could sweet talk to me and win. I am not even extremely pretty in reality, just regular looking. Sure I know to make exceptionally nice looking avatar. But I still am rather proud to be true and loyal.

[@thotimusprimeofficial273]

that ovarian cancer story is giving “no my baby maker is broken!!!😠”