Mom Erases Daughters Disfigurement From Family Holiday Card, Daughter Is Upset And Confused AITA

[@helens6199]

Story1: yeah, next years card they should cut moms face out and replace it with one of her younger years (when she was 18 for example).. she would be happy, right?

[@absolutelyridiculous6743]

Perfect revenge!

[@berylwheaten9385]

@HelenS PERFECT 😂😂😂💕

[@margaretannfrank5480]

Oooooooo! Good comment!

[@GabrielleHayes1921]

This!

[@rabkerr9809]

Classic

[@janejane6754]

I'm crying for the poor girl is the first story. I'm glad at least her brother stood up for her but her mother is so horrible.

[@danacarter9147]

So am I. She's lucky that her brother is her support system. God bless his heart.🙏💛👍

[@kimberlyterasaki4843]

Last story is the definition of "don't throw stones from glass houses"; OP makes awful, hurtful jokes at his family's expense but expects an apology from his family after they decided they were through with his shit? Dude, you wanna be a comedian, LEARN TO READ THE ROOM.

[@ilbercgross4736]

OP is gonna get more than his feelings hurt when someone (probably brother) punches him in the mouth.

[@TheLodjur]

Last story, what an AH. He called the dad to whine, to get approval and got told off. What a sad individual. "I felt attacked" yeah for being a jerk! The brother defended his wife and OP started to cry and moan "he is mean to me" to his parents after being a nasty prick to his SIL for no reason. For his sake, I hope he wakes up, his parents should have talked to him 10 years ago and not allowed him to take over his brother's special days. Spoiled, self-centred brat.

[@untitled-gv3qp]

"It's the least you could do for not having a big wedding", he said. he started all this because he was salty they didn't have a wedding he wanted them to have. And he didn't even mean the offensive line as a joke, he said that after he realized how gross what he said really was. His post made it obvious that the brother wasn't lying about what the OP's like. I wonder what other things he's done in the past.

[@missalii4792]

He's so terrible that he went to the other parent hoping that the father's dislike of the mother would override his basic human decency. Too bad for him that his dad calls what quacks a duck.

[@scousemouse9566]

That mum photoshoped the pic to make her feel better not her child she is a massive AH. Loved the video Mark, thanks

[@phantomtales7274]

For a second, I read that wrong and thought you were calling the daughter an AH. Sorry about that

[@groofromtheup5719]

Tell mom, well I guess we know what we will need to do when Mom kicks the bucket, just shop her in and pretend that the narcists is still there making the OP miserable.

[@pippo17173]

That is a yikes from me dog because goddamn, the mother shows why some people shouldn't be parents.

[@danacarter9147]

@@pippo17173 I so agree with you, the mother is a full-on bully.

[@JLee-gm6jx]

They did say for their parents acquaintances meaning its more for their image rather than being for the well being of their children

[@precious_toebeans]

As someone with fertility issues, whenever someone insinuates something like this last guy did, I make the asker feel miserable by telling them I can't have kids and isn't this awkward now, guess you should have thought before talking. To laugh off that comment completely disregards the pain that I would have informed them of, which is exactly what that last asshole did. Moral of the story: don't bring up babies to women who don't have them.

[@rachelcrawford1977]

We starting saying we send out invitations every night. Makes people so uncomfortable it stops questions

[@tazhienunurbusinezz1703]

Whenever someone asks my daughters when they're going to get married & have kids (which has happened way more than I'm comfortable with considering one is 21 & the other is 17 & both are single), I start asking them when they next plan to have unprotected sex. I also ask what they are doing to make themselves more attractive to the opposite sex. I get incredibly graphic because, when you are asking someone when they plan on having kids, you are really asking about unprotected sex. My girls aren't planning on having children. They loathe these questions because nobody takes their answers seriously & everyone condescends to them about how they don't know what they want & they'll change their minds. I think that's an odd thing to say when a full 20% of American women won't have children. I don't mind confrontation so I take the heat off of them. I also give the people asking the same sense of discomfort they're trying to give my daughters. I think that's only fair. Women's bodies aren't public property & women's deeply personal family planning choices are NOT small talk. That's where I'm at. It only works for me though because I don't care at all what anyone thinks of me. If you're going to come at my girls, I'm going to come at you...game on.

[@Davtwan]

sleepy star - I think it's more than just the fertility joke. OP thinks it's about a "stupid joke," but it's really about the behavior he's been showing for the past several years.

[@Mewse1203]

I feel like the drama came from the relatives who knew about the face disfigurement. I get the vibe mom is blaming OP and her brother when people who know what happened saw the "fix" and no message from the brother or OP and got mad at mom for erasing the truth. Otherwise no one would have any issue that a teenager wouldn't write anything.

[@Davtwan]

Dominic Gallegos - Even if they didn't know, I can imagine it'd cause drama regardless. ("Why hasn't OP and her brother wrote anything or even signed it like they did for over a decade? Is the family in trouble?") Either way, the family likely laid the blame at the parents' feet rather than think the kids are ungrateful. They noticed the strange behavior that was out of the norm and were curious to ask about what happened.

[@helens6199]

Story2: She should just tell the guy he got his wish - it's like his daughters were never born.

[@moonbear5929]

👍 Perfect!

[@TheNormExperience]

“Saying she was sad I didn’t appreciate her paying to get my appearance ‘fixed’.” Except it’s NOT broken! It may be different, it may be shocking for some people, but it’s also a testament to how strong your daughter is, how much she’s been through and survived, and how beautiful she is for accepting and loving herself when apparently even her own mother can’t. Your daughter isn’t part of you, she isn’t broken, and she isn’t yours to fix. How dare you as a Mother tell her she should be. It seems she doesn’t even want OP in the card at all unless she’s “perfect.” Which is ironic since the Mom certainly isn’t. Here’s what I’d do - make my OWN Christmas card to send out to the people I care about and screw the rest, or if you really want to drive the point home to your Mom how incredibly cruel what she did was, ask to do next years, and have your Mom completely photoshopped until she no longer looks like herself because you just “fixed” her is all. 😏 Btw, this parent is SOOOO lucky OP is emotionally ok after her extreme trauma and new appearance because if they had any form of body dysmorphia or PTSD this could have had very, very serious and harmful consequences...

[@ineedhoez]

But it is broken. She was disfigured in an accident. No one would intentionally request to have their face like that. It is ok to say that she deserves love and acceptance anyway. It is also ok to acknowledge the truth! Stop gas lighting and pretending nothing is wrong here.

[@TheNormExperience]

@@ineedhoez I didn’t say nothing was wrong - I just said she wasn’t broken and in need of fixing because no one else gets to decide that but the person whose face it is.

[@kheventplanner]

I have bells palsy on top of having had 3 strokes. The right side of my face is paralyzed and i can't smile on that side. My family seems to love my new smile but it's still so embarassing to me. The right eye droops so it looks closed alot of the time. I'm so glad i have a supportive family. I would be crushed if someone in my family acted like that 😥😥

[@berylwheaten9385]

@KathyHosking I'm sorry 😭😱😭😢

[@kheventplanner]

@@berylwheaten9385 i appreciate that hunny. I deal with a lot of health issues but i do ok.

[@louvano5411]

Wish you all the best and the best of health. I’m sure you’re tired of people pitying you so that’s not what I’m gonna do. I know you’re strong :) keep fighting. Very lucky to have a supportive family by your sude

[@J_e_s_s]

I'm happy that you can still smile and I'm sure they are too. Beautiful smiles aren't always about the mouth/teeth. For me, its the eyes. They get a certain Twinkle when its a genuine smile and that makes it beautiful. I'm glad your family loves you as you are as they should. I hope you have a nice, peaceful 2021 surrounded by loved ones.

[@maryturpel8413]

Story 4: NTA Your family has been afraid to cut you out of their lives and you have kindly given them a reason they can all agree on. /s

[@MrJpaynebb]

That's it and thank you. OP makes new SIL cry over her infertility which he forgot about (call bs on that), your brother gives OP only a few of most likely a long list of him having to be the center of attention at other people's expense, mom being mom in a nice but firm manner says OP needs to apologize and his dad who hates his mom ( sounds like a bad divorce happened) even tells OP in a polite but firm manner he's TA. Take the hints fools, YTA. The brother's main reason for a small ceremony during covid was just to avoid having OP present. I would say get ready for low or no contact but this clueless narcissistic moron doesn't understand messages when they are hitting him upside his thick skull.

[@quarterknight3572]

That last story... I heard the title and immediately said "YTA" And then it got worse... And worse... And even worse...lol Oh how dense can that kid be lol

[@Prettypoisonswitch]

I know it was like a train wreck that you just keep thinking it can't get any worse and yet.... How old is he? He honestly sounds like he is in middle school.

[@delu3709]

Talking as someone who hasn't seen his bio father since I was 3, if he suddenly came back asking for support, I would laugh him out of the room.

[@ashlyngalaxy8398]

"Jolly good shrubbery old chap" is something I really hope I can use someday in the proper context.

[@thePanda_huma]

That last OP is such a narcissist!!!! He feels attacked when he's the one that caused the issue.... who raised this child😳

[@danacarter9147]

I'm with you on that, he's a sadistic AH! He finds humor at the expense of his own %£?@ing brother and sister in law, I mean, that's beyond hurtful and insulting!😡

[@kittymellisaqueen]

The op in story for made me sigh a lot. Your attitude must seriously be that bad if one parent that hates the other parent actually agree with them on your attitude. Op really needs to change their attitude.

[@ceciliagonzalez6152]

First story what I would do is be petty take new pictures with the brother. Then after writing the messages , explain why you didn't write in the first card. Let them know the truth about the true people your parents are.

[@jasminpedrosa5976]

Story 2: isn’t it interesting how nobody stands up for a person that is treated badly their whole life by an AH-family-member but when the tables turn just once, suddenly everybody has the guts to tell the original victim they are an AH?

[@Arylwren1]

Story 4: how little self awareness does a person have to have to think they are NTA in this situation?

[@H.P._Lovecrafts_Beloved_Cat]

Dang, from what OP described in story 3, a clover yard sounds awesome. I’ll have to try that when I get a house. OP could try to build a stone fence on their property to prevent the spread. I’m not sure how effective it would be, but who knows.

[@jasperj.d.g.4147]

The wind would still carry it so unless it's pretty high it wouldn't work well.

[@H.P._Lovecrafts_Beloved_Cat]

@@jasperj.d.g.4147 yeah, I was thinking it might take a lot of work, time, and money to build one too. I guess it could be worth it if you want to put the effort in. Hopefully OP found a solution.

[@jasperj.d.g.4147]

@@H.P._Lovecrafts_Beloved_Cat yeah, she also doesn't want to keep the clover. She should stick it out and start with her real plan!

[@terramarini6880]

He needs to engage the neighbor as an ally, state his dislike of lawn, desire to use a low growing walkable (such as clover) and get his "expert" advice on choices (little ego stroke there) before making any regrettable choices, neighbor might offer to maintain his lawn for him, sounded like he tried with the dandelion pulling, until he gets his perennial beds sorted.

[@sydneykahn3616]

Mark 7 Months Ago: 🙂 Mark 4 Months Ago: 🥰 Mark Now: 😆

[@DragonHuntress404]

The Gardening story is wholesome. The OP understands the neighbour loves his lawn and the OP wants to help the bees with easy care but flowering gardening. My backyard is full of local native flowering trees, some are even on the endangered list. They bloom within weeks of each other then require a trim back to grow lush and vibrant again. Always chat with your neighbours if what you are planting may affect them. One of our larger trees had an overhanging branch and when the neighbours cut it down, they asked us for permission since its our tree and if we would want it for mulch. Turned it into smoking wood chip instead and now have like a year or twos supply

[@badkitty4922]

Omg. The OP in the last story reminded me of a former boss around 15 years ago. She scheduled me to work on Mother's Day and went on to say that it shouldn't be a big deal, because I couldn't have kids and both parents were dead. I hated that bish.

[@maheenahmed6653]

Story 2: I’m so sorry that op has two shitty parents, but OP absolutely should not help her dad. What her dad is going through is karma, it is the universe giving back what he put out. Also OP should suggest that if the dad were to die, it would solve his problems. Not suggesting he do anything but that him dying would solve a lot of problems

[@TheLodjur]

"Look, I PH'ed your face pretty again, aren't you happy? Now we can pretend it never happened and I will feel less embarrassed about you." Yeah, I can't imagine why OP would feel hurt... Had someone, much worse a family member, PH'ed my wheelchair out of the picture or cut in a picture where I still could walk, I would be devastated, hurt and furious. I have scars on my collarbone that I like to show, I find them beautiful, they are my battle-scars and I have pride in them. No one has the right to take that away from me. In fact, NO retouching of photos should be made without clear consent, it's disrespectful. Put the head of a female dog over that mother face on the next photo with the explanation "to match her personality" and see how she likes it. And remove the spine from the dad, turning him into a blob, with the same explanation.

[@justaperson4656]

I literally have a scar down my leg from my father's neglect (incident involving a trampoline). I have had it since I was 5, and it's not at all visible due to its position. If it was lower down, and someone PH'd it out of a picture so I "look better" I'd be fuming. It proves in part how my dad treated me, and it is a reminder of how he was before he abandoned me.

[@graceful_rose_thorns]

Story 4: Narrator: *Acts like a total jerk and makes fun of this brother and SIL* Brother: You ruin every event that I invite you to Narrator: *Surprise Picaku Face* i DoN't ThInK I'm ThE aSsHoLe-

[@LilChuunosuke]

Story 4: I knew by the title that it would be one of those guys that are like "haha, I love dark humor! Everyone is too sensitive nowadays to appreciate my humor!" (says something racist) (says something homophobic) (says something ableist) (says something hurtful and insensitive)

[@STB-jh7od]

Story 3: How come I never heard of clovering? I never wanted a house with a yard cause I HATE YARDWORK! Did WAY TOO MUCH of it as kid/teen, to this day I hate smell of freshly cut grass. Now I have a way around that, thanks. Story 4: Even his Mom & Dad, who hate each other, agreed OP makes everything about himself. ALMOST every little girl dreams/plans for their wedding, and OP is such an ass SIL agrees to a small zoom wedding rather than having OP there. That should tell everyone all they need to know, Bro & SIL should ABSOLUTELY cut him out of their lives, EVEN if he apologized.

[@BronzeDragon133]

Story 3: It's not a bad idea at all. I'm a lawn-obsessed person, but actually know what I'm doing. My lawn doesn't allow weeds because it's that thick. My neighbors want clover? Add clover. NTA at all. Also, mow long, longer grasses grow more slowly. OP is right, clover isn't particularly problematic, easy to control if necessary, and everybody will get it naturally anyway if there's space.

[@ravenmagic5]

Oh then depending on where you live you'd LOVE creeping thyme. Never grows taller than 3in smells lemony and is SOFT AF and super purple

[@ReyK_47]

Mark, I have corona. Me and three of my teammates were moved from our college dorms to an off campus house. Your videos have been a bright spot in my day! Thank you! 🥰

[@jgw5491]

Take good care of yourself and all those around you. Get well soon.

[@ashleylowther7759]

Get better soon!

[@melissaclark1051]

Fourth story OP makes it sound like it is their wedding.

[@musicallydisneyamvs6731]

Story 1.) What mother does that to a child?! That’s like...wow. That’s her child! OP has been through a lot. OP has a spineless father & a superficial mother. Story 2.) NTA. I would have done the same & go no contact with everyone.

[@DragonbornCanid]

Story 2: i would have laughed at him. Laughed and laughed and laughed... ending up in shrieking laughter, and then just hang up. That should get the point across LOL

[@maheenahmed6653]

Story 3: Lawns like the ones OP likes are so pretty and so beautiful compared to boring lawns like the neighbor has. And it’s better for the environment. More power to OP, they are NTA, because they’re being considerate and being as preventative as they can .

[@maheenahmed6653]

I’d like to add, I don’t think that people who do like to have traditional lawns are assholes. If they like having a lawn like that and it makes them happy to work on it, more power to them. There is no right way to maintain a lawn, or Atleast there shouldn’t be. So long as you don’t have a whole bunch of trash on it or things rusting or getting damaged.

[@briansmaller7443]

@@maheenahmed6653 Agreed. And I have an acre of lawn around my house. Maybe more. It does take a lot of time to mow - and there is clover in places as well. As far as grass and lawns go neither are AH and both are good. However, i think the OP is an AH for making race an issue here. Fuck her.

[@paden1865able]

I like to have dandelions, violets, and Creeping Charlie in my yard because the bees feed from them. I also allow milkweed to grow for butterflies. My son loves to blow away the dandelion fluff after they go to seed; he makes wishes on them.

[@michellej3140]

When I was a child we had two droughts 1976/77 (uk) everyone's lawns were dead and brown except next doors which was green and lush. The council inspector came around to check that we were all following the water hose ban. He went straight to our neighbours lawn and laughed. It was lush green clover!

[@siaskies1704]

Story 3: Almost choked on my gum when I heard the username because I recognized them from tumblr and this is definitely on brand for them. I think it'd be an asshole move to just do it without warning the neighbor, but I think if they took precautions, it should be fine. The neighbor uses chemicals to control his lawn, so the clover shouldn't spread too badly, anyway.

[@carolcarol9982]

That last poster has the emotional age of 5.

[@bonniebaldridge1248]

#1 God darn. WTH? NTA. My stuupid weird mother started badgering me to get my front teeth capped, sayin 'they looked horrible'. WTF?? I asked friends and relatives and they were baffled, too. When I finally did cave in, convinced I looked hideous...SHE DIDN"T EVEN NOTICE. Her excuse was "I haven't had time to notice', looking very embarrassed.

[@TsukiKageTora]

Story 4: he made a joke about the possibility of his brother’s wife being pregnant because they chose to marry in a pandemic even if he forgot she cannot have kids. Instead of apologizing, he doubled down on it. That alone makes him an asshole even if he did apologize, which he didn’t making him even more of an asshole.

[@ThePinkBinks]

The clover is also a food crop. Not smart to mix it with grass though. You probably can't use moss where you are unless you create shade otherwise I'd suggest moss. You can also mow clover to stop those flowers from growing and seeding. So you could do it but you'd still have to mow. 🍀

[@owl7072]

Story 1: I feel like the reason there was drama wasn't because they didn't sign the card, but because the people who DID know about the accident realized what the mom did and put two and two together and raised hell about it and started asking questions. The mom's petty as hell for refusing to take any responsibility and pinning it all on OP.

[@志瑜杨]

Damn I thought the father who didn’t mention his kids was the biggest ass of the month, but then story 4 comes along. Ewww.

[@flamelily2086]

Its wrong of OP's mother to erase OP's disfigurement on the photo. I can understand why OP is upset and refused to sign the cards. It makes it seem as though her mother doesn't accept the OP's scars.

[@silverfox1492]

I feel the same way when my grandmother suggests surgery to "fix" my face or whenever I look back at my school photos and see where the school hired photographers editied the left half of my face without our consent or knowledge

[@CiCiirishkitty]

Instead of clover, why not just mulch everything? You can then plant flowers, fruits and vegetables! Hence, no more grass!

[@amberleeannalee1999]

Clover is a natural growing grass. It’s beautiful and the wild animals love it. She should plant it everywhere

[@AnimeLover-iy5bv]

Oh my goodness. Story 4 made me so mad I wanted to fight OP so much. That was not a joke.

[@cheskydivision]

I love clover. It's so pretty I even like dandylion. You don't need to talk to the neighbor . Most likely you will cut the grass bef9re it goes to seed..

[@olly2027]

Can you eat clovers?

[@justaperson4656]

@@olly2027 are you a rabbit? In that case yes

[@sheilaclemett4353]

As an apartment dweller with some Irish ancestry I would love to have a lawn full of green clover: shamrocks. I would cheer this lady on for her research and ecological sense.

[@macylouwho1187]

My grandfather clovered the field next to our property before I was born. To this day at the age of 42, I am still finding it popping up in random places around my house (we own their property now) half a block away from where it was planted 😂. The field was grassed, but the odd clover still pops up here and there. It is also a pain to mow and seems to dull mower blades faster than grass does.

[@jasperj.d.g.4147]

Story one) that's just cruel! Her face is her face, it doesn't need to be hidden, it's nothing to be ashamed off nor something to be hidden. Story 3) NTA, it's her lawn but YTA if she puts it close to his lawn. Talk to him first for sure. Story 4) YTA, it's not funny, it's cruel. He should've said sorry. Everyone is telling him he's wrong and that he has been doing this for a while yet he seems to believe himself to be a good person.

[@Acidfunkish]

Story #1: Her mom is ashamed of her new appearance. 😒 And she wants her to feel embarrassed of herself, too.

[@jpbaley2016]

Wow, 1st story, I think it’s Mom that has to be “fixed”. Kudos for OP’s brother knowing immediately what was wrong and not letting Mom get away with her need for such superficialities. 2nd- I would tell the extended family that no one would ever expect someone to provide monetary support to a sperm donor because that’s all he ever was. 3rd story - OP needs to create a barrier. My oldest sister lives in Colorado, which does have watering restrictions because of long-term drought. My sister completely ripped out her lawn and replaced it with stone because how had it is to maintain a lawn. Clover is gorgeous and much better than the obnoxious weeds that would take over if you don’t waste money on environmental damaging chemicals and breaking water restrictions.

[@-mokerly-5984]

Clover is a very normal lawn thing in Europe. I keep regularly discovering these corporate dystopian things about the States- "clover is a weed in order to sell more herbicides" being something i found last year.

[@isiaadiel3468]

"I started attacking a woman knowing that what I said was hurtful and people got mad so I felt so attacked. When they showed me all the reasons I was a spiteful prick and people who enabled me agreed, I felt so attacked. They say I make everything about me and how I'm the victim, but I fEeL sO aTtAcKeD!!!"

[@SherriLyle80s]

Story 2: pure example at Karma at it's finest. Indulge and enjoy, savory the moment, OP.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Whoever is reading this i send hugs and great vibes. Drink water, eat food, nap, take a break, take care of yourself gosh darn it. And if you don't I swear I will find you and keep you in a cottage and take care of you. 🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗💜💜

[@user-wb6fm4hu2h]

same for you

[@queen_of_flatulence]

Well, I send you virtual hugs back 🤗

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

@@queen_of_flatulence 🤗🤗💜💜

[@user-wb6fm4hu2h]

@@broken_queer_but_fighting8589 🤗🤗💜💜

[@user-wb6fm4hu2h]

@@queen_of_flatulence 🤗🤗💜💜

[@dracawyn]

Less than three minutes in and I'm already so riled up I had to pause the video and go get a drink to cool off. This woman.

[@donniejefferson9554]

Last story is a perfect example of schrodinger's joke. A comment that is simultaneously a joke and serious until the person making it sees a reaction.

[@JSainte17]

That would be the greatest response, Mark. OP should've taken the card, uploaded it, and photoshopped mom thinner or without any wrinkles and said, "There, that looks better. Let's sign.". Mom's head would straight explode; but not before she threw a temper tantrum, turned on the water works, and cried to OP's dad. OP and brother would have a good laugh though. So would dad, if we're being honest, just not in front of mom.

[@mbyerly9680]

Flee for your life, it's a gardening tip: I'm a great fan of clover, but I don't have any neighbors to bother. The deer and the bunnies love it, too. A good substitute for bigger clovers that can live with the grass but give the same benefits is low hopclover. Also, in the American South, clover disappears when the weather heats up and will return either late in the fall or the next spring so you'd have a dead lawn.

[@Darwinsmom]

We have an apiary (beekeeping) in my area, and they maintain a great presence on social media. Their message is very clear - in this time of rampant colony collapse disorder and the consequences to the human food chain if we lose our pollinators, they are striving to educate people to the benefits of allowing dandelions to grow on their lawns. The pollinators apparently love clover too. Maybe OP could start a conversation with their neighbour about the importance of growing plants that benefit the bees and other pollinators, and explain to him that CCD is a real threat to the world's food supply?

[@CallofFreaky]

Hey, Mark. I've been a fan since i first discovered you a few months ago, and i've been watching your vids every day since. I watch all new vids, and when done with them, i dig up old ones. I try to comment, and interact but i'm often doing something while listening, so not always able to. These videos always improve my day a lot, and that's really what i needed today. This video really helped me calm down, and decreased my pain, from a ton of transphobia i had just faced, from someone i considered a friend. I just really want to say thank you, for acting as a coping mechanism for me. I was in physical pain, chest, stomach etc. but that has almost completely gone away, with you and my friends' help. Thank you so much

[@lindaeastman8908]

For the mom that photocopied her daughters appearance on the card is the AH. I was in a car accident when I was 23 and my face was badly cut and I lost part of my left eyelid. I was lucky and it was repaired a little, but I still have scars on my face from it. I would have been just as upset if my mom did that to me too. Thank goodness your brother backed you up. You are NTA

[@threeducks157]

An aunt tried to pull this bs with my face, it's a large scar from combat, she got freaking dang near burned at the stake for it. Our HOA forbids things like clover and dandelions there was a lady that aperantly like dandelions and seeded her lawn and had freaking hundreds sprout in spring they freaking spread and contaminated every lawn in the block. She got finned very hard and had to pay for every single lawn treatment.

[@DiscoTimelordASD]

Story 1: That card was edited solely for the sake of the mothers pride and vanity. That's unacceptable and I would not accept that either.

[@BrayStowers]

Story 1 NTA. WTF. It’s not “nice” it’s literally covering up a part of who you are! And from the sounds of it it’s only for the mothers coworkers so she can continue to project a “perfect family”. When this doesn’t make it any less perfect. Which is really messed up. Your brother is amazing that he’s as supportive as he is. I’m genuinely flabbergasted (as a parent) that a mother would do this to her child without being requested by that child. My heart breaks for this girl.

[@barbararamos4825]

Aussie here and our 'lawn' and garden beds have heaps of clover and dandelions. Our bees love it and they're great mulch

[@chulutheimposter5415]

I always forget there is a second post every day, my memory for these things. Also that intro music is vibing worthy.

[@Mariet31]

I'm glad OP's brother refused to sign the card, they were treating her like the black sheep. Imagine if she was missing a leg or something or had special needs... people live for their reputation

[@dragonriderabens9761]

Story 3, I agree with the whole “you would be THA IF” sentiment, but my concern is this: It sounds entirely possible, even likely, that even talking about it as a possibility will turn the neighbor into a lifelong enemy, because he’s not reasonable I could easily be wrong, but all the gardening tips in the world won’t help if the neighbor is going to go full Chad/Kevin/Male Karen simply because OP wanted to discuss it, even if OP respects the “no, don’t do that to your lawn” despite them blowing up and going into a screaming rage (worst case scenario) My concern is what OP should do in that situation I don’t know Jack shit about gardening, but I know people can go crazy over the smallest things

[@laurenmentink7401]

Story 4 = I was wtf when OP stated that his brother only got married because she was pregnant. You NEVER EVER say that to someone even IF the woman IS pregnant! It is beyond crass to say it. OP was instantly TA at that point. I didn't even need to hear more. (Crass = disgusting).

[@frith.calluna]

Story 1: NTA How is this poor girl supposed to get used to and learn to love her appearence when her own parents basically tell her she should hide it every chance she gets. And going behind her back too? That's just not acceptable and plain selfish. I'm glad the brother agrees with OP, as he should. You do you, OP. Don't let anyone blame you for being proud of who you are and what you look like. Story 2: NTA ''I didn't get involved in any of my childrens lives, complained about them, insulted them, didn't pay enough child support, told them they shouldn't have been born, laughed in their faces when they begged me for help and many more things. Now I've fallen on hard times and they won't help me??? But they owe me! For.... uh.... donating my DNA to them? How DARE they not help me after all the things I did for them!'' What do they say again? You reap what you sow? You made your bed, now you must lie in it? Play stupid games, win stupid prizes? Story 3: NTA OP made it pretty clear from her post + ETA that she plans to discuss this with her neighbor and take precautions as to not inconvenience him. She sounds like a good neighbor. Story 4: YTA Hey, at least there was a joke in this post. OP's entire personality is one big joke. He's just one big attention seeking gardening tool and I can't believe this guy is actually a year older than me when he acts like such a child. OP is the AH on so many levels here. - Complaining about his brother en SIL's wedding all the time and insinuating it was trashy - Making a dumb ''joke'' about that reason they got married - Doubling down when SIL said she was infertile - Not apologizing - Having the absolute AUDACITY to go oMg WhY aRe YoU aLl AtTaCkInG mE???!?!?! yOu'Re So MeAn! - STILL not apologizing and doubling down / demanding his brother apologizes to him for aTtAcKiNg HiM - Having the self-awareness and emotional capacity of a toenail

[@z0mb1egutzz]

Story 1: NTA. She did it just to make herself feel better. Story 2: NTA He can rot.

[@Voodoomaria]

Story #3: Here's a suggestion or two: 1: Rather than plant an aggressively spreading cover that WILL impact his lawn, Have that conversation with him, Tell him what you have in mind and why, [leaving out the clover] and ASK FOR HIS EXPERT OPINION. Chances are he knows EXACTLY how to accomplish what you want to do WITHOUT negatively impacting other people's properties. Be open-minded IF his ideas are somewhat different but still achieve what you wish. OR 2: He LOVES lawn care and uses it as recreation, Ask him if he wants to expand and take care of yours as well YOU pay for all the supplies used on your property, and give him a nominal amount for the work, Discuss what you want, and let him go to town on it. and on top of that tout his skills to the rest of the neighbourhood, "The man is an artist, you should really look at what he's done" etc. You know, by working WITH your neighbour, you could end up with a really good friend for life. THINK about it.

[@zombiexi1292]

For the clover story, maybe a small picket fence to prevent blown seeds????

[@lilyannetherose]

Story 4 - Are we sure the OP was 21? Was that a typo? Because he sure sounded like he was 12.

[@xElvirax]

Love the random things you throw in sometimes. I laughed!

[@L3adb3lly]

"Merry Christmas disfigured daughter - heres a little reminder of what you used to look like. I am ashamed of the way you look right now, but definitely don't be mad and definitely don't assume im calling you ugly or anything"

[@madcatlady]

how can anyone be so self unaware as the last one?

[@LordGertz]

A Mark Narration is just the perfect gift I needed for my Birthday. Your smiling voice always lifts my mood, even when the stories make me so made on others' behalves. I also had really wanted a clover yawn, as one of our neighbors had had one and it was beautiful, alas in Southern California you could fined for such a water guzzling yawn, they had take theirs out.

[@alisonsmith7162]

Story 3 - instead of clover, maybe just deeply mulch over all the dying grass, add a seaweed solution to support nitrogen in the soil, and start putting shrubs in as you save up for them.

[@emilypayton2070]

The only thing that would make me pause the sopranos.

[@rayfordreed9304]

Will you ever bring back r/talesfromtechsupport? Edit: What a great brother in story 1 Story 2: I don't understand in these stories when they demand that you move in. It makes even less sense to me than demanding money for nothing. Story 3: What kind of question is this? Story 4: some people need to learn what joke means

[@brat8360]

As for the story about the lawn, I hear a lot of ppl using moss rather than grass! It never needs to be cut, always stays green and looks pretty cool! If I ever have my own home that's what I'd like to do

[@poohbear4515]

That first one hurt me inside. I have a disability that my own piece of shit father didn’t accept me and didn’t call me a daughter, but an accident to him. So this hit hard and I feel horrible for OP. Their being tormented all because of their mother’s selfish, and just downright cruel changes to the picture. It’s practically showing them that their mother truly doesn’t love them the way they are and wanted to ‘fix’ them. Who cares what’s on the outside, mothers, and the whole family should love the child no matter what they look like. I’m glad her brother is the only one who saw the major issue, even if he left but I’m sure he was just tired of hearing more of his shit-filled-brain mother’s reasons for said changes. The father was also an asshole, one of those brainless followers who understand(my fat ass he did), but doesn’t want to start trouble and keep his poor, whiny wife happy than how his child felt. Both mom and dad suck hard, but the mother was such a disappointment to all caring, and loving mothers out there. Fuck those assholes. OP shouldn’t be in that kind of relationship at all.

[@maheenahmed6653]

Story 1: If the mom set the card right after the daughter shared her opinion, then things would be okay. But considering what she did do, and what the dad said, it is clear the mom is ashamed of the daughter.

[@vaporean_boylove.0w083]

I feel gross with they mother. She is shallow and can't accept it and did that for a gift for herself not the daughter

[@JJerseyGirl]

YTA. Your brother tells you of your problem of how you ruin events that involve him and gives you more than on example and you still didn't see a problem of current or past behavior. Then when mom called you out you ran to your dad "because he hates mom" to back you up and when dad backs your mom and brother you still don't see a problem with what you said to your SIL and brother.

[@SelahLewis]

Just in time for me to listen and have dinner. Hope you're doing well, Mark!

[@olly2027]

Just finished dinner abs now I’m cleaning up.

[@tzukaza]

final story: you know you fucked up when someone who usually hates the ones you are whining about even tells you that you fucked up

[@Sate12]

Clover is absolutely delightful. Its a shame he thinks it's a weed. NTA as long as you're careful and considerate

[@averymartin1327]

If I were the car accident victim, I'd never sign another damn card for the rest of my life.

[@kudoro1357]

Story 4, I'm surprised no Reddit comments mentioned this but the OP is doing the exact attention seeking behavior he was denying doing. He did something shitty and terrible to make other people look bad because he didn't get what he wanted, laughed and blew it off when called out, then when no one agreed with him he went to his dad that he pointed out "really hated" his mother for the sole purpose of getting attention from someone he thought he'd for sure get attention from over this. OP's Dad surprised him by not being on his side (which that alone is pretty telling) and so the OP came straight to Reddit trying to get approval and attention from anyone. The entire time he tells the story he tries to make it about how he's being attacked, trying to make himself the victim when he's just a bully. Man needs to grow up.

[@Norinia]

First story, if she really cared sooooo much ‘for the daughter’s sake’, she’d pay so she could get plastic surgery as she pleased (if she’s okay with herself now, that’s great, I’m just at the start and she said she had a hard time at the start.) cutting and photoshopping her daughter’s image is not helping. That just reinforces and makes her think it’s not okay to have the disfigurement.

[@gottathinkupanewone]

Last story: To a woman who cannot have children, a shotgun wedding remark is not a "bad joke;" it is a knife in the heart. OP clearly thinks that being called out for a lifetime of poor behavior is the same as being "attacked." He needs to grow up and realize that the world, and everyone else's milestones, don;t revolve around him.

[@darkdancer46]

My sperm donor once told someone - he thinks Ima NOT his child, coz I don't look like his mistress's child (i was 13)....when he asked me why I don't call him or spend time with him...I told him Ima not his child, so why would I? (I think I was 15?) The majority of people at his funeral DIDN'T even know I was his.....I only went coz my mom made, the food was good & I saw friends (of sperm donor) whom I LOVED (the only ones who knew I was his) My real dad is my step-dad! Love that dude to bits!

[@ashh4929]

Story 4: Holy freaking Jesus I just facepalmed so hard my eyeballs almost popped out my damn head. 😳🤦

[@susanlosey9511]

It’s bad enough you got scars on your face. However, your mother is the AH. She should be happy and glad that you are alive. Stay strong OP! You are an awesome young lady. Your brother is an awesome young man for standing up for you!

[@alexismyers6053]

"There's a lot of gardeners on Reddit" *looks out my window at the several feet of snow in the yard* I mean, if you live where I do, there isn't much garden to be done, so not much else to fill your time with I guess lol

[@sierrasasmartass7755]

While OP's mother in story 1 may have had good intentions her actions ended up hurting her child. The scar/burns are a testament to an extreme hardship she had to go through, regardless of if one day OP ends up having cosmetic surgery to remove them in the future, the memory and emotional scars will remain as well as how much they have effected her self-esteem and self-worth for all her life. The accident she was in is now part of her story and her mother trying to hide that away is like she's denying her daughter went through such a serious event that will forever effect her. I'm glad OP's brother stood up for her and my heart goes out to her for having someone who seems so hyper focused on outward appearances rather than focusing on uplifting her daughter's self-confidence/self-worth.

[@rebeccahetrick6576]

The guy in The last story reminds me of a kid I knew in high school. He had moved to our town in Connecticut from Montana during freshman year and he seemed to have no filter. To begin the story I need to tell you about my friend Tracy's dad he had suffered for a long time with cancer and even though he was divorced from Tracy's mom they were still very close. So after a long battle Tracy's Dad succumbed to the cancer and everyone knew because we were all in a big friend group together. So maybe two weeks after the funeral we are all in the cafeteria having lunch together and Tracy made a joke or something, or said something that somehow set off the guy from Montana and he says and I quote "Why don't you just get cancer and die?!" I swear every table around us went completely silent. I don't think any of us spoke to him for at least two weeks after that. He also did things like bringing a pocket knife to school and also during lunch, opens up the pocket knife to pull out one of the knife blades and chucks it full force blindly across the cafeteria and almost takes out someone's eye. The school ended up calling the police and the Montana kid was arrested. and if I remember correctly this was either just after or just before Columbine so it was a really big deal...

[@GabrielBadwolf]

If you really want to be an asshole to your neighbour plant a herb garden full of mint along your property line. Or put Ivey on your fence. I do volunteer work at a charity where we grow stuff. Mint will take over and grow really quickly everywhere it took over one of our poly tunnels when we grew some, it’s also really hard to kill mint. Also we sold some Ivey plants 2 years ago and we’re still weeding the stuff out of places, every time we think we’ve got it all it comes back.