Mistakes People Make When Getting Over Someone

[@jong5150]

I had to end a relationship 3 months ago after years of abuse. I immediately wanted to figure out why she did the things she did. I became obsessive in figuring out why. For weeks and weeks I watched videos, read books, etc. After exhausting myself I came to a revelation...instead of trying to figure out why she did what she did, I needed to find out why I allowed what I did. The focus had to turn from her to me. It was a shocking revelation that shook me to the core. I now realize I have a lot of work to do on myself and I’m committed to do it because I never again want to go through what I did in this relationship.

[@kennethluiz4588]

Heloo do you need instant help

[@kennethluiz4588]

I can recommend you to a man who can help you Manifest back your relationship like he did mine 💖

[@kennethluiz4588]

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[@kennethluiz4588]

+234,81660,34660

[@VoxLesPaul]

The world needs more people with familiarity of narcissism. God can place you in the presence of people that need to know what you have learned during your research phase.

[@xo_ectophylla_alba_xo]

Logically speaking, the best revenge is happiness. A narcissist CANNOT stand it when someone they dislike is happy!!

[@triplekids3]

I agree with you!

[@bradmcewen]

I totally agree too. Since all supply is seen as transactional they dont even like you when they said they do. Happiness thieves and anguish spreaders.

[@andreamagyar7776]

They are mad even a stranger is happy.

[@bradmcewen]

@@andreamagyar7776 That's a clue for current or future indications.

[@andreamagyar7776]

@@bradmcewen learned my lessons well. Now I have ears as the desert fox.☺

[@BCHODOSH01]

Stephanie, great advice. People who were in an abusive relationship are more than likely trauma bonded, and it will take you a while to start healing. Be patient with yourself, and quit trying to figure things out with logic. Your abuser worked on unstable emotions, not logic. They do not see, perceive,understand or react in the way an emotionally stable person does. You didn't cause their emotional dysregulation, you can't cure it, and it's not your responsibility to fix them. Go no contact, work on yourself, quit worrying about them, and pay more attention to you and getting to a better place in your life. God put your eyes in front of you, so don't look back because your not going in that direction, look ahead to a better you and a better relationship in the future.Stephanie, thanks for another informative video. Be safe and well and " see " you next week.

[@teresadockery8043]

Such great advice, very well-said; THANK YOU!!

[@saras6043]

Well said!

[@BCHODOSH01]

@@teresadockery8043 thank you, greatly appreciated.

[@rubensalazar9619]

That and we don't trip over coffee tables .

[@kaitlin6300]

Love this! Thank you!

[@johanamarin7904]

That's exactly what it is, we try to make sense of what we just went through when none of it will ever make sense.

[@KE.T500]

So true!! As I'm watching this video I'm trying make sense of what I just went through. Im trying to heal.

[@mrtwister9002]

But it does make sense, think of the source.

[@desertangelfish140]

It's like coming out of a car crash!!!

[@loriallen9237]

and we'll never know there's no sense in it until we try to make sense and couldn't. 🤷‍♀️

[@brianlane9534]

It will never make sense. You got that right.

[@lydias.coaching]

It's really important that we don't take someone's mistreatment as a reflection of ourselves. We need to be responsible for us but also put what is not ours where it belongs.

[@loriallen9237]

But leaving is a reflection on our progress. Even if you're discarded- it was a gift to you. Any way you get separated from abuse is a good way.

[@samanthalennon4447]

I really needed to watch this video tonight. Thank you so much. You just gave me light at the end of the tunnel. ❤️

[@robbrewer2036]

Hope life is good now.

[@divannimendez6064]

Amen🙏👍😊

[@treydudley]

That’s my problem. I made some bad decisions in my relationship, but they weren’t cheating or anything. Either way, they were mistakes but I still wonder if I hadn’t made those choices if it would have turned out differently. I know it wouldn’t have, but I still feel massive guilt over it.

[@mademoisellecm1]

I always stay too long. Trying to love their hurt away whilst breaking my own heart. I am learning to let negative people go.

[@emmaharper860]

Absolutely no more negative 💯

[@kayc5804]

me too

[@jc8258]

I totally agree with you! "They should be teaching this in school 🏫. "

[@triplekids3]

Yes I agree with you 💯 %

[@lenihassveasphaug9634]

Totally agree!

[@juicylucy6488]

They should be teaching self love :)

[@Joshdifferent]

Yup 💯🔥

[@emmaharper860]

A narcissist days

[@KrisASims]

I got drawn in by all the love bombings. Things were amazing and then in literally minutes, things changed and the emotional games started.

[@Crackrocksteady]

Same thing happened to me

[@Shad0wC0mpany2]

She always drops exactly what we need, when we need it!

[@lm6962]

😭😭😭😭soo true. I just messaged my ex narc after 3 weeks no contact and guess what..he claimed he messaged me but I didn't get the message. He thought I ghosted him. Urghh...so hard to just stop and cut him outttttt...I invested so much but he has lived incessantly and I found his lie. The hurt was that he could ignore me, even on my birthday.... I wished him the best and that's that. I pray for strength 🙏🏾

[@juliela.]

Absolutely true!!

[@juliela.]

@@lm6962 don't wish him anything. How he ruins his life and the life's of others, is not your fault.

[@kikid6701]

Lit. She does 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

[@ewljr]

@@lm6962 you deserve more. I think that’s where you need to start. My last relationship was an extremely painful breakup but it really showed me what I need in a partner and what I need out of myself. Self reflection can be painful but like Coach Stephanie said, if you’re gonna go through the pain then you need to learn something from it. Now I go into dates with potential partners knowing what I’m worth and what I need. It makes it so much easier to help choose that next partner and it makes life so much more joyful for yourself even if you’re alone. I’ve married two narcs and didn’t know what that was til the second. I’ve found happiness even after the last breakup which I loved dearly and she wasn’t a narc. Please care for yourself and try to learn to self parent like she says. Happiness to you

[@MikeSims70]

TEN YEARS I've been stewing in regret over my 20 year marriage that ended 10 years ago... then I stumble on these videos about the covert female narcissist and its like you were all there when everything happened taking notes then you just read it all back to me in these videos. It's such an overwhelming reality right now ... that when I learn even more about this topic, the emotion is powerful ... Ive never cried from a feeling of total relief simultaneously wrapped in absolute outrage and a realization that I've been duped into believing something about myself that simply isn't true and I have to find myself again and work my back out of this prison I built for myself ... though the awareness of knowing that's where Im at is a huge advantage.

[@MikeSims70]

@@donnersmom "Gained" is a hard sell right now. If I would have had this knowledge 20 and 30 years ago, I could have avoided throwing away 20 years of my life.

[@upclosesneakers6875]

That's exactly how I felt when I discovered it.. felt like I read my whole life (few years) on the screen.. the fact I got to a point where I had to google her behaviour shows the depths of this insidious scenario... sorry to hear about so much of your life given to an undeserving person. it really is a mind bending experience and all you can do is focus on yourself and come to terms with the reality of what your partner was. Mine was female covert narcissist... no accountability, hypocrisy/double standards, hyper sensitivity, obsessed with public image, name calling, demeaning, disrespect... man its horrible.. the only good thing is we discover the things that need work within ourselves.. I was definitely a people pleaser... not any more.. wishing you the best man

[@donnersmom]

@@MikeSims70 I apologise for anything I said that upset you.

[@roberttruman8444]

Hopefully the validation provides some closure, but I find it's still too easy to want to question 'why?' even after learning who they are. The mistreatment is so hard to accept and even harder to forgive and move on from and wishing them well. It took me years to get over my ex and honestly I could not reach that moment of acceptance and forgiveness until I myself had gotten into a much better and happier place. Unfortunately the same woman hoovered me ten years after when I had forgotten much of the past and never realised what narcissism was. Went through 7 years of the worst most fucked up treatment and now having to go through the stages of grief over the same person all over again. I'm not sure I'll be quite so as forgiving this time but who knows. I think my respect for her has all but dissolved and won't come back.

[@MikeSims70]

@@upclosesneakers6875 Thank you for the nice reply and your list nailed it for sure. I have so many thoughts on the topic and how the experience has been definition to so much of what I thought was normal ... re-defining normal ... is more than just verbal acknowledgement ... its FEELING the expectation in others and knowing how to not be ok with certain behaviors. This is why I've been single for 8 years now but I am definitely happy.

[@elsiemarina2572]

Narcs are attracted to people with low self esteem as they can suck the life out of them and it doesn,t take much effort on their part. Hence when you are standing in the ruins of the aftermath you start blaming yourself..Please Please believe me the only way is up and you WILL get better..You will become the truly good authentic person you were always were meant to be and always really were!The only person you need to show who you are is the one in the mirror.

[@1111spiritualone]

actually they are attracted to strong minded people because they wish they were them and its a challenge to break that person down. I saw this in another counselor’s video

[@MsPrincessaj]

@@1111spiritualone I totally agree!!

[@MsPrincessaj]

They are attracted to those people who have something they want. The person they are attracted to has a strong mind and all the attributes the narc seeks, which their insecurities crave. Unfortunately, the other person gets tripped up because of their continued giving and pouring into the narc, which is where the challenges of low self-esteem, codependent behavior, etc. become present. This is fuel for the narc to see you as a pawn, and the person they can use up, and suck life out of, without thinking twice. I think that when a person begins to work on knowing and owning their own worth and value, they will look for and expect true reciprocity in a relationship.

[@1111spiritualone]

@@MsPrincessaj i went thru it for 4 months then went no contact. its been a year and im a very strong independent woman. i felt drained from that relationship that i couldn’t see myself dealing with that any longer.

[@shannonkringen]

Yep the guy I've been with for 5 years seems to think that he's helping me all the time and he's actually not

[@whitepearls20]

The most healing thing I have heard so far since my break up is from this video which is that someone’s abusive behaviours has nothing to do with me. I blamed myself so much cos I kept thinking “if I had self respect, if I had a good self esteem, if I had good boundaries and high standards, he would have treated me well”

[@RicardoLopez-ty4kn]

same thought but it's more of why did you stay for so long just to end up being the one suffering.

[@whitepearls20]

@@RicardoLopez-ty4kn the great thing is- we can learn from our experiences and not repeat the same mistakes :)

[@RicardoLopez-ty4kn]

@@whitepearls20 she won't let me see my daughter's though cause I stopped supporting her life style only for my 2 daughter's.

[@whitepearls20]

@@RicardoLopez-ty4kn Damn that is stressful- can you go to court to get access to your kids?

[@tluangteiichhakchhuak2985]

So true..

[@nanat9178]

I needed this 🙏 been crying every day balling my eyes out. While that person has found new supply. I have been no contact 2 months now. Shut tight. Blocked him everywhere. I'm done done done. But I feel so much pain inside 😭 because of the disrespect and abuse I went through

[@peeaaziz1237]

Try hooponopno healing method to forgive yourself first , because the guilt of choosing that person needs to be dissolved dear.... Sending you loads of love and may the Lord Bless you always ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@nanat9178]

@@peeaaziz1237 Will try ! Yesterday was the first day in 2 months that I didn't cry even once the whole day... 🙏 Thanks to all the blessings and support I received 🙏 may God bless you ❤️

[@buzzingbee9499]

God bless you, I was discarded almost 3 years ago it's really really hard. There will be alot of ups and downs but over time you start to feel so much better. I still have days but it's not as severe as it used to be. I was with mine for 15 years so I get the excruciating pain. I locked myself in my room for almost a year couldn't barely take care of my kids I get it. But I promise it gets better and you need to cry and talk about it. You need to get it out. Also read psychopath free by Jackson McKenzie. I couldn't put it down it's such a good book and healing.

[@peeaaziz1237]

Yesss focus on healing, it’s more important....

[@nanat9178]

@@buzzingbee9499 thank you so much... You have gone through so much and come out of it so strong. 🙏 I was really looking for people who rose back up again. I'm also trying to, some days I still have to push through the pain I drown in... But I am hopeful for the day I'll make it out... 🙏 And I needed a good recommendation to read as well. 🙏Thank you . May God bless you !

[@dianaortiz8021]

I went into the relationship a happy, healthy, confident and physically active person to a broken, sad, damaged, 40 pounds heavier mess. It’s been 4 months since I told him I couldn’t take it any longer and needed to move on. We were together on and off for 18 months. He said ok. If you moved on, you’ve moved on. No big deal. With everything he put me through that was the worse. I was emotionally in such deep pain didn’t think I could overcome this. He was covert. I’m working on myself now and healing slowly. I know it will take time. I now know it wasn’t me. Thank you for your advice videos. It has helped me in the process of moving on.

[@ShagorikaBhatia]

Girl same. My ex was a covert narc too and I was healthy and happy too. Mine came back with such a 5th grader apology. 🤦🏻‍♀️ I'm never going back. He has done SO much emotional, physical and psychological damage to me

[@dennisrobinson8008]

The workouts and the weght loss will transform your mind and body to before him. You will need to connect with others who value and appreciate you. I suggest a good love life, one night stands or low interest men will keep you emotionally scarred. You need that real love and care. But for now give love to yourself. Don't let his treatment tell you who you are.

[@bitchpuhleese]

This sounds like my story - 2 years of the on and off and I’m just ending it- he hasn’t apologized for a damn thing. But they don’t.

[@HorizonHipHop]

Same, was doing really well for myself before narc ex gf came into the picture, 9 years and 2 kids later she ruined me completely, like a parasite or cancer and now I have a huge mountain to climb. Discarded me like nothing. But I'm a month or so past the crying and wondering why

[@samanthawilliams5520]

Hits home. They devastate and just walk away without any second thought. You have to pickup alllll the pieces

[@nicolaxoxo1]

I actually wanted to test myself, as well as admittedly getting some sort of satisfaction, by seeing my ex again. This was also to get my keys back and give him a few belongings he had left. The satisfaction came from me being totally unresponsive to him. He had a look of shock on his face when I was dismissive and he said “oh, don’t you want to talk?” Haha my reply “honestly I don’t!!!! Bye” It felt so good! Hate is the opposite of love and it is still a waste of emotion on the sack of shit. Indifference is better. So happy I achieved that moment. It took a lot of pain to get there.

[@suzane3751]

no honey APATHY is the opposite of love. They can still get supply from emotions charged or categorized as "hate"

[@jennifercoolidgeislife6760]

Dang I need to give him keys and his stuff today.. trying my best not to engage at all.

[@thelostatlantis]

LOL, I had the same experience and same shock on his face! After I broke up with him 2 years ago, he came over one time to collect some of his belongings that left behind. I didn’t know he was a narc at the time, but truly was not prepared nor anticipated any further encounter. So when he showed up at my door, I just opened the door and handed over the bag to him. Just when I waved at him and ready to close the door, he looked rather shocked and in disbelief, said to me, “oh you just …” I was also in disbelief, “yeah, what else? Bye!” Lol I still remember his facial expression before my door hit his face. 😂😂😂 honestly I couldn’t figure out why he said that until now… he thought it was an opportunity that something might’ve happened if I let him in , or even better if I wanted him to come in 😂😂😂

[@kasietaylor6458]

Okay I gotta ask.. when you said bye and left were you really happy and empowered or were you secretly hoping they would finally care and come after you? Like waiting in your car and thinking to yourself, “please come after me.”

[@nicolaxoxo1]

@@kasietaylor6458 it was he who left my house, he had come by to get his belongings which I had long ago put in my garage, and to give me back the keys. Thankfully I did not find myself wanting him to come back…..he had wounded me deeply before and for me once the trust was gone, I was done. Admittedly it took me some time to reach the place where I could be indifferent to his face

[@reallifepsych3309]

6000+ languages in the world and she chose to speak FACTS on this one! This is why I love this channel!

[@quickgirl80]

I did all the research & obsession while I was still in the relationship because I was determined to fix it & I’m glad I did. It woke me up to the reality of the relationship dynamic, I realized I gave away my power, I saw him for what he was, & saw our relationship for what it was. Seeing that while I was in the middle of it made the difference between confidently ending it vs questioning my decision.

[@chrissineely3863]

If your dealing with a person like this or even think you might be dealing with someone like this LISTEN TO EVERY WORD SHES SAYING SHE GIVES YOU EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW

[@chrissineely3863]

DUH... MOST OF ALL God I couldn't have done this without his help still healing 1yr later it takes fixing yourself to heal from them even if you feel you don't want to get over it do it cause you get your life and piece of mind back .

[@MysticButterfly22]

Stephanie this video was needed!! I have been in both the obsession mode & wanting to know everything about NPD and why a human being could behave in such a way. Also, I blamed myself for years why I attracted a demon, and how stupid I felt for letting myself stay for so long.

[@leenasankla1903]

U might want to check out Radhika's youtube channel. Is Narscissistic Healing for Empaths- I think

[@msharic85]

Same

[@jill6581]

Me,too!

[@mademoisellecm1]

I always stay too long. Trying to love their hurt away whilst breaking my own heart. I am learning to let negative people go.

[@rocknrollbuff]

Only nice people are of use to a Narc

[@LuisMartinez-iv3qy]

OMG! After a 20 year marriage and 3 kids later I finally learned that’s it’s not me. No matter how much love and respect I gave her she’s un capable of giving me the same. Realizing I am the one responsible for giving myself that respect and self love that I always craved. Now to be true to myself and understand where this co dependence and people pleaser comes from in my own childhood and learning the skills to STOP it and set healthy boundaries that I never realized I didn’t have before. Thank you very much for your videos!! They have helped me to start realize the hard truth about where I need help with.

[@dorijohnson8367]

It’s so hard when they come back apologizing and telling you everything you ever wanted them to say. And they seem sincere It makes me question myself. Was he really a narcissist? Was this all my fault? She helps so much!

[@joenparra13]

I was asking myself the same questions. Is he really a narcissist? Should I give him more time? Was that all my fault? I have read on Quora, see KZbin videos, and read articles on narcissism, his behavior indicated he was. After 11 months of totally keep him away and not talking to him. He hoovered and I decided I needed to convince myself and I decided give him a chance. It was awful, every behavior you read everywhere he was doing it. Like you said: " They tell you exactly what we need to hear" Sweet when they come back, sounds so real and true, they sound so remorseful, but you can see that doesn't last. Don't forget what makes you take the decision to keep him away in the first place. Something I learned in this relationship is to listen and honor my inner voice, intuition, gut instinct. We were not raised to do it, but that voice was talking out and loud and I refused to listen to it. Now I am more in tune with it, it's is there to alert us, to guide us. I wish you joy and happiness.

[@suir1828]

@@joenparra13 ❤️🙏

[@vivianejik2138]

It wasn't your fault. They're crazy

[@sabrinamohammed9778]

You mean they apologize ?

[@lenihassveasphaug9634]

It's their way try come into your life again.. You're definitely not the narcissists.. We all ask our self those questions.. But remember. It its all fake.. They fake nice, (do everything possible) To gain control over you. Please dont let it happen.. You deserve better! They only get worse when they manage to get foot in again, and also look down at you even more. As easy target, who they inside laugh off. Thats how sick predators they truly are. And they want us to think the way, you just described here.

[@cliff961]

Wow, I really needed to hear this right now. My narcissistic wife of 25 yrs and 3 kids left me 4 months ago. Didn't know about this disorder until I started researching after she left. I felt I was doing good with letting her go, but we are now coming into the holiday season and I find myself grieving and crying over the loss all over again. This video helped me put this more in perspective. Thank you!

[@carmenmyer8985]

Trust me cliff I was with one for 20 years they don't change not ever ever ever no matter what you do!

[@a.kamileon]

i’m so sorry man, prayers for you and your kids 🙏🏼 may God comfort and heal you all

[@jonathanomahony688]

I was with my narcissists husband for 35 years. Believe me they will never change, I know as I was with one for 35 years. I am 4 months out thank God. I discarded him, no contact and removed him from the home. Doing great thank God and you will to. Work on you from the inside out. Plenty of self love and respect. This helped me to move forward.

[@sammyspliff4640]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I was with a narcissist for 4.5 years and didn't realize it until the very end. He discarded me during Christmas.

[@macb1959]

I feel your pain I was also in a marriage for 39 +. Found out two years after she passed away that she was on a dating site as I was suffering from depression I now see that there was a lot of infidelity ,I will never get any answers and this is very hard to take! Wish you the best hope you are doing well Cheer's

[@Lantern66]

10 months on and I'm still in pain. I am obsessed and can't get off the hamster wheel. I do this because I didn't get to know him properly, as he kept me at a distance. My loop goes like: was he a nice guy who was overwhelmed with my anxiety, expectations and neediness; or player who knew what he was doing; or a highly narcissistic manipulater; to blaming myself (which does make me feel better); or it's all in my head and my anxiety has run amok with my thoughts.

[@luciostherpos7997]

You've just described my relationship with me ex! Crazy making!

[@natiramires.a]

I know what you’ve been through since I’ve been there myself. You need to take a step to get your life back because you deserve it. This person came to your life you show the things that need to be worked on and healed. You can do this! Sending light and love to you ✨💫💜

[@bijalvadgama2050]

I really think most her viddeos are for people who have to deal with kids tbh

[@ivyjahcares2665]

U will be fine ...just go no contact love your work and yourself start doing what u were doing before u met him..it wasn't ur fault but him.

[@kelest4215]

I'm going through the same thing. I also wonder if my ex was either a player or narcissist or both because I recognised some overlap in behaviours. Sucks because it was my first relationship and now I'm scared to death of trying to date again since I don't know if I can trust my judgement about people at all. I feel like a moron now.

[@jason7810]

This is a very good video and very well articulated. I was in a 19 year relationship with a narcissist that completely destroyed me as a person. The best thing I did is cut off all contact with her immediately. After 4 years I'm still working on the rebuilding, but oh my life is so much better now.

[@prockfisherman8661]

I took the no contact advice from one of your videos over 3 yrs ago now. Probably the single most important thing i did.ty

[@rickhammar1636]

I'm fine with moving on & living my best life. I will admit it wasn't an overnight decision but the problem is co- parenting with a narc. It seems like the more you disconnect from them the more they torture the kids just to make everyone's life difficult. Coparenting with a narc is nothing short of hell.

[@adamdurham16]

Gosh it’s the worst..

[@weekendwarrior8843]

agreed!

[@summaiyarobi4915]

Also mke thm over weight on purpose.

[@weekendwarrior8843]

@Vera Hoppe 🤔🥴🥴??

[@wms72]

Yes, I have to let my narcissist ex ghost me so he doesn't hurt our kids

[@kaceycarterxo]

You are literally my therapist. I'm going through all of this now. I really appreciate your videos

[@tejasrawat6181]

This video really helped with my past troubled relationship with a Narcissist. Now I understand that I should stop blaming myself for my ex's crazy behaviour.

[@pinkymichelelvn.6747]

I am so sorry to all who has experienced these relationships. Thank You So Much for validating the unexplainable depth of pain from the dissolving of mine. It has been the worst emotional & physical pain I’ve ever endured. I am sure after this video, I’m on the right track and appreciate the extra tools and support.Thank you so much for sharing your experience & knowledge.💝😇💝

[@lioydwilliams1850]

Michele, LVN,hope you are not with a narcissist 😈!

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Michele, LVN,You deserve better 🙏🙏🙏

[@frederickcollins4534]

Yep, it's weird, because it's the worse for me, too. I was going to save a beautiful, abused, neglected addict of so many addictions. She was so adjusted to a life of dependency. No sense of goals other than a better dupplier... provider. I still love her, pray for her and want to know about her future, all while knowing that without one heck of a therapist, she'll, likely die, a used slave to a misguided brain. I font feel it's her fault. I blame a lame judicial system and loads of narcissistic relationships in both of our pasts. I fidnt see this coming, but, too, I knew we were formed and that without sobriety znd therapy, neither of us were right for each other. God, I pray, save us, all, and enable self love, first, that we may go on to create a healthy loving world.

[@sayusayme7729]

♥️

[@mariankeller5852]

In my opinion the biggest mistake people make comming out of a narcissistic relationship is believing the abusive narcissist will feel remorse and will realize their mistakes and become the loving partner you want them to be..it will never happen... they believe YOU are the problem..not them...you need to realize...YOU DIDN'T FAIL..the RELATIONSHIP did

[@kmlm13]

Biggest thing about dealing with the aftermath of ending these relationships is confusion. Mainly confusion of who they really. That confusion and bring fog unfortunately seeps into all aspects of our lives.

[@confusedspoons]

Agreed the confusion makes you question yourself. Took me a while to trust myself again and other people.

[@kmlm13]

@@confusedspoons, I'm a year out, after 4 years being with her, and still catch myself trying to figure what I already know. Patience is the key word here, and as Stephanie says this was not a normal relationship, at all. Low, or zero expectations is the best approach. I was definitely bordering on obsessing with trying to figure out what really happened.

[@friendlyneighborhoodspider3962]

I was saying to myself “ I’m not trying to figure out why she acted the way she di-“ then I realized the videos I’ve been watching. I’ve been devastated for nearly a month now.

[@frankj1123]

You are an angel ! When no one else believes what I’ve gone through. I watch your videos and you say exactly what I need to hear and reaffirm that it was real. Much love from Canada you are so important to my healing and easing the hurt .

[@aariapoor]

Exactly described the situation currently I'm in. This break up it's nothing like a normal one, until I can't even use the name "break up" for it, it's something like escape, drag yourself out, grasping for air ....

[@twoguardmedia3585]

This video is perfect. I'm about 75% of the way to healing. Its been painful, but I see the universe sending me a different energy as well as opportunities the more I learn ABOUT ME. Go through it, grow through it.

[@riissmith5836]

Thank you, I needed to hear this. I went from dating a sociopath to a narcissist in the last two years basically. My soul is perplexed, but I learned how strong I am even though I let these women play me. I'm a sucker for love and a big empath, I learn that I give and give and extend grace to a fault. But I went no contact for both of them and am learning that I am not responsible for anyone's inner peace-- that's all God!

[@trishgee3945]

This is exactly everything I’m going through. I am trying to get over a break up with a narcissist. It’s the most heartbreaking thing I’ve ever been through.

[@chozensaga]

Hang in there. I left after 20 years. One of the most difficult things in my life. It's a process, take it day by day...you got this 🤗

[@vilenaantonova5636]

youre not loosing ;) youre reclaiming your dignity

[@juicylucy6488]

I’m trying to pack my bags :(

[@josephcongello9483]

im 57 years old ive been in long term relationships i just was in a two year relationship i was engaged to her she was i believe a dismissive avoidant style person she was very damaged from her past relationships she ended it with me basiclly out of no where. i love your channel and has helped me alot, in my experience is 8 out of 10 times unless there was some kind of abuse mentally or physically there is a third party that came into the dumpers life and thats what ended the relationship them thinking that this new person can give me what he or she is not giving. its an allusion i wish some of these coaches on youtube to address that no one ends a relationship to be alone theres always someone else in the picture you think is a better fit out there but in realty they wind up worse then you. theres no one in this world that has an great and happy relationship . impossible !!!!! . its the lust and temptation of the oppisite sex that distroys relationships.

[@imnotthatguy4765]

Inspirational Post for the day. This is for anyone who has ever been physically or emotionally abused. This cat was brought to the shelter a little while back. A human failed him, and allowed him to stay outside and be bit, scratched, and bullied for an entire year. In 12 years of working with animals, I have never seen a cat so beat up that managed to survive. Animals have so much to teach us, and that is why I have dedicated my entire professional life to caring for them. This animal has been bit, scratched, and beaten to within an inch of his life. His wounds are so numerous it would be impossible to count them all. Despite this, being failed by a human, and tormented by the cats around him he is still full of love. The unconditional kind. The unimaginable pain and discomfort that he suffered hasn't taken that away from him. He is still as loving and handsome as any cat that I've ever had the pleasure of caring for. Every day you open his cage, all he wants is to be pet, get his scratches, and boop you with his big ole tomcat head. Abuse of any kind, be it emotional or physical affects millions of people each year. Some are battered and bruised, yet for others these wounds are internal and invisible. Both are equally as scarring. It's very hard to move past being hurt by someone, especially someone you loved unconditionally flaws and all. Sometimes you lose friends, close family, and more importantly yourself. You gave yourself to them wholly, and they exploited, manipulated, and destroyed you. You've reduced your beautiful self to a conduit for their happiness at the cost of your own. It's a terrible feeling, nearly incomprehensible, and the scope of its damage is deeper and darker than you thought possible. If you left, you will try to pick up the pieces of your shattered self and reassemble them. It will feel nearly impossible to be whole again. If they left you, you will question your self worth and be consumed by your inability to understand their actions. The sting of the perceived inadequacies and flaws they indoctrinated into your mind to keep you under their thumb. You feel used, broken, and can't understand why your love, understanding, and unwavering dedication weren't enough. If you left, it hurts, but its the best thing you will ever do in your life. If you were left for someone else, it is a painful blessing in disguise. You need to learn to love yourself again. Start from scratch. (Pun kind of intended)Find what it is you love about yourself, and fix the things you don't. You've learned a valuable lesson on what behavior is and isn't acceptable. You've felt abuse first hand, and it will be easier to spot in the future. You've been taught, in a despicable way what unconditional love isn't supposed to look like. Looking back, you can see the subtle(or not so subtle) manipulations, the need for control, and what its like to be broken down. These cycles don't need to continue, and not all people are this way. Some people are just sick and incapable of caring for anyone other than themselves. You know the feelings of discomfort, being put down and brought back up based on what they need from you. If you're lucky, you learned this lesson early and minimized the damage this person and future people will inflict on you. You have friends, family, and loved ones who care for you deeply and unconditionally. You know what that feels like. Never settle for anything less, set expectations and boundaries and enforce them. Be yourself, and never change for anyone. You are unique, beautiful, and are one of a kind and if someone doesn't see that they are not worth your time. You shouldn't change, or let them change you because there is someone out there who will truly love you. Flaws, strengths, quirks and all. Let this furry guy be an example of not letting your circumstances break you. No matter the devastation and hopelessness, be greatful for the lessons you've learned.. and let them mold you into a person you are proud to see in the mirror. Things will get better with time and self reflection. Don't swim against the emotional riptide because it will drag you to darker and deeper waters. Use it to better yourself, and one day that special person will find you and you will have that connection and bond you yearn for. Love you all. ❤

[@nikhook1114]

Wow, that was amazing. Thank you for that, when you are just starting to go thru the break up it's hard to believe there is going to be anything but hurt for years to come.

[@jessed6151]

Thank you for writing this, it moved me to tears.

[@AndrewFosterSheff69]

I needed to hear this right now, thank you. The reason it is so hard to comprehend is that the memories, experiences and emotions you experienced were all with someone that didn't even exist! They adapted (lied) to you personally and is why they come across as "perfect" during the "love bombing" phase. And this is why it makes you end up questioning reality because you know it happened but none of it was real. I am beginning to believe "narcissism" and NPD is ABSOLUTELY DEMONIC.

[@laurenlivengood858]

If I would’ve known that this level Of torture an mental pain and heart break existed an ppl actually do this I wouldn’t be in the mess im in I knew about toxic relationships and I knew a self absorbed type of person before ok but the mind games the lies for no reason and then the care taker in me wants to figure out why this happened to them an why I was born an empath an fell for it so easily time again it’s a learning experience life is always difficult but people are just about themselves anymore an it makes me sad

[@rubensalazar9619]

I wondered how mine got to be the way she was also. I stopped wondering because I could never put my finger on it, who knows why? I thought maybe she was abused as a child possibly sexually which comes with mental issues. Abused possibly by a family member. I thought about maybe she was dropped on her head, actually I just thought that one up. Way too pretty for that one ha! Maybe it's hereditary. But I read not too long ago that if you stay with a narcissist for too long that you yourself may inherit their endencies and traits. From the story she told me about her ex-husband, she for sure absorbed some of his bad qualities in their 20 year marriage. I think that might be the reason. That's what I'm going to tell myself anyway and move on and stop caring so much. It's not healthy for me and a waste of my time. She took 2 years of it. I refuse to give her more if it wondering why she is so f'd up. Good luck to you! Take care

[@rubensalazar9619]

We sound a lot alike. Too bad we didn't meet in the library or at a bar or something and have drink and compare our trials and tribulations. LOL but I totally get what you're saying. I had no idea that there were people that messed up out there. People who spend their One and Only Life playing games and lying and cheating and just torturing the person they pretend to love. It's even more shocking to hear that there so many of them out there.. But I'm a born empath myself and I put others before myself. Gladly happily and because it's just who I am. Gladly, happily, because it's just who I am. I would never cheat on the woman I love and I would not lie to her. I have said in the past that I will tell you the truth no matter what, even if it hurts you. We can go from there. Can't live with myself even after a little white lie. It's nice to meet you, whoever you are. It sounds like we went to the same exact thing but with the opposite sexes. I never have been treated so poorly in my life and I told her so. And I put up with it way longer than I should have. She actually deserted me in the middle of town to walk home sick when didn't want to go to the doctor in the first place. I wouldn't do that to my worst enemy and that's what she calls love? It hurt when I saw the signs that somebody had been at the house with her when she was supposed to have been alone. She was so good at lying and I could not believe that somebody could actually treat me that way and for two years?! Look me right in the face and lie over and over again when they said they never would. What a fool I am. But I left her. And I hold her in the beginning I don't care how pretty you are if you screw me over I will walk. I proved that she didn't think I would. she thought I would be like all the other men. Let her do whatever she wanted because she was so pretty. Not me. She would say that she could go out any night in the the week and get a guy if she wanted to. But it wasn't what she wanted. She just wanted the ones that she had on the side. I cannot believe she would make a fool out of me I'm probably the first guy to tell her back that I could do the same thing if I wanted and she knows that's true. Beautiful ladies are always woo-hooing taking my picture. I didn't know what a narcissist truly was. I didn't find out until after I left there. But I knew there was something seriously wrong with her and I would tell her all along that I can see the real you and you don't like it when people can see you, do you? It drove her nuts. I am a modest humble quiet person. I am an artist I play guitar I love my bike and I work and play Outdoors much as I can. She told me at the end you used to be so chill and nothing would bother you when we met. She should tell herself something by telling me that. Why? I'm not an abusive loud person and walked away from every single argument that we ever had but she would follow me and find me no matter where I where I was and it would just get worse. We got where I would leave to the cabin. I think she wanted me to do that's what you could have the house alone. I'm pretty sure she picked fights to get rid of me for a moment. it hurt so bad when I was being talked to you so nasty for absolutely reason, usually she was the one that got caught doing something stupid when I was treated that way, and I was accused all along of cheating on her when I wasn't and never would cheat on her and she would just couldn't believe me when I said that. She didn't want to, she wanted to tell herself that I was cheating on her so she would think that it was okay to do whatever she pleased without guilt. Like I said what a dummy I am. That's strike three for me and I'm 55 now and not ready to throw myself back out is there. Hard enough to meet somebody with the virus looming large over us all. but I feel my chances of finding somebody that will not lie and cheat on me are next to nothing. This past Relationship, The Narcissist was with somebody that I went to Junior High with in 78 and 79 and we hadn't seen each other in 40 years and she found me on Facebook. That's the stuff that fairy tales are made of and all she could do with it was tear it up to pieces pray I'm tired of heartache and don't want to try that anymore. At the same time I can be lonely. but like I said, I don't seek the Limelight and would rather not have attention but who doesn't like to laugh with somebody cute? Anyway sorry to ramble so much to say LOL

[@mariariley3894]

@@rubensalazar9619 sorry to hear that. Life is not fair but the Lord has a plan for each of us. We can not see the big picture right now but keep the faith in the Lord and in yourself. My spouse cheated and lied to me. We have been married 21 years. I am not sure what is in store for me as I am working on healing myself right now.

[@F0reverblessed]

Having compassion for yourself it’s important. Giving yourself time to heal while maintaining distance from this person is key! 💕 From a self love content creator to another- great video Stephanie! ❤️

[@triplekids3]

I agree with you 100%

[@F0reverblessed]

@@triplekids3 Thank you! :)

[@emmaharper860]

It feels great no drama. But now he calls me from different numbers🤮

[@adamoart211]

Everybody who has ever dated a Narcissist should watch this video

[@jaanaprall9961]

I am watching this video after moving across the world to start a new life after my divorce. I have good days where I'm clear on what I need to do and then I have bad days where I'm consumed with grief, confusion, and sadness. Your advice really hits home with me and makes perfect sense. Thank you for the important reminder that you are the architect of your own life and responsible for your own happiness. The future is yours to create, and if you focus on these things you will move forward in a positive direction. This was really helpful. Thank You!

[@heyoldman2003]

Once again ....Thank you Stephanie. I am just wrapping up a 42 year life of pain ! Thank you for explaining it all 👍🏼 I am happy to consider my future 😎

[@timorthelame1]

Don't feel bad old timer. It took me closer to fifty years to get right. I suppose even us old dogs can learn new tricks.

[@minervagalvez4748]

Yes, I was able to be so vulnerable in an intimate setting and be able to love so intensely that now I know that I can surrender my heart fully to a HEALTHIER PERSON ❤

[@craigglenn3711]

I enjoy these. Nobody I talk to know or understands what it’s like and how serious it was.

[@ancastelapop7575]

So great, thank you so much, its exactly what I am doing, no contact for 113 days, 26 years of relationship with a neglectful cerebral narcissist... I am happy, I am enough! I look forward to the new and improved ME!

[@kennethluiz4588]

Heloo do you need instant help

[@kennethluiz4588]

I can recommend you to a man who can help you like he did mine 💖😅

[@kennethluiz4588]

Watsap him 💖

[@kennethluiz4588]

+234,81660,34660,

[@MJ_24Sevem]

These videos are amazing for people who’ve felt with abusive relationships. They’ve helped so much and EVERYTHING is spot on. I’ve been having all of these feelings and thoughts and although I’m sad that so many people have experienced what I have I do feel comfort knowing I’m not the only one. Thank you for your work to help us all heal!!

[@kevinhallemann4095]

YES! Letting myself Love was such a blessing. I made every mistake in the book. I thought I was an expert narcissist detector. lol We had conversations about the narcissists that I grew up with. Covert, is just that, I fell hard all in. The best part was learning that I am able to love someone with all of me. Thats a huge win. Its a journey. Love and trust your heart. I enjoy me. The right people in life will also.

[@teresadockery8043]

Stephanie gets to the point and she stays on topic and is always SPOT ON, thank you Stephanie!!!!! Your videos have been my saving Grace.... I’m 2 months into a breakup; on the right road to healing now, YAAAAYYYY!

[@kennethluiz4588]

Heloo do you need instant help getting back your relationship

[@kennethluiz4588]

I can recommend you to a man who can help you like he did mine and it works without delay 💟

[@kennethluiz4588]

Watsap him 💖

[@kennethluiz4588]

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[@manetmeow]

Stephanie you have no idea how much this means to me. I'm a suicidal survivor and I always dealt with depression. I unfortunately married a violent covert narcissist (for 6 years) that destroyed my life 2 months ago, the way that you can make me feel better is so unbelievable! I'm an empath of logic and it really means a lot to hear you explain things the way you do. Again thank you so much! 😌

[@minimalistbae1986]

So needed to hear this..basically embrace all your humanness while going through this break up

[@SandyCove143]

God Bless you,Stephanie, for simply showing up authentically, imperfectly and passionately, regardless of ANYTHING & EVERYTHING. When you are in hell, you MUST keep going! Getting stuck in one’s story” and all of the circumstantially flawed thinking/narrative is the thief of progress and recovery. You AND literally all of your open and honest commitment, content and genuine desire and encouragement for people to fail….forward, to get dirty through consistent ACTION vs. thought, and the hope of some magic bullet or dream that someone is coming to save you is both EPIC, and TRUE. Actually, someone IS coming to save you and it’s YOU. Yes, it sux, and yes it’s gonna hurt, but the only way out is through. Too, it’s not the snake bite that kills you, it’s the venom, so buck up and do the ‘work’. You are SO worth it. So anyone reading this, please, PLEASE get after it. Learn the lesson. Put yourself and your wellbeing, needs and health first. When, not if, you come out on the other side of all this you will be unstoppable AND happy! Let that sink in. Thank you, Stephanie, for all your hard work, your constant/consistent message and content of hope, and for being a shining light of positivity and strength. Lord only knows how many people you have helped… frankly too many to count, but I am among the many, many, MANY beneficiaries of your help. It’s impossible for me to articulate and/or overstate how grateful I am. Andrew

[@evelynrenish4248]

I look back and I know how I got into it. My focus now is to be healthy and not let the experience ruin me. Thank you my dear. Your videos help

[@automatonlabs9195]

If you cooperant you can also go no contact, there is no need to suffer, there are social services that can take damage for you and make boundaries.

[@iamJustJoyAnderson]

The FIRM *No Contact* is what I had to learn because it kept ending up as Love Bombing w/ a side order of Aggressive-Possessive Infatuation. Your videos have been influential and I am appreciative of your work as well as your passion. Thank you.

[@lindseymattson7700]

The hardest part to heal from is how much he acted like he loved and cared about me. Then, his mask slipped off, and had me replaced within two weeks.

[@kennethluiz4588]

Heloo do you need instant help

[@kennethluiz4588]

I can recommend you to a man who can Manifest back your relationship like he did mine and it works without delay 💟

[@kennethluiz4588]

Watsap him

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[@VoxLesPaul]

And, don't monitor social media activities of the narc. Immersing yourself in their current world will kick you emotionally. "No contact" includes resisting curiosity.

[@fantasiazplatkami]

Ahh i keep checking if the guy is online

[@VoxLesPaul]

@@fantasiazplatkami Been there, done that. Resisting curiosity is part of the healing process, friend.

[@fantasiazplatkami]

@@VoxLesPaul i struggle with myself, often just want to call,but remind myself that he rejected me , it s not my job or position to mend or reverse it😔

[@VoxLesPaul]

@@fantasiazplatkami You are "trauma bonded", similar to the psychological relationship between alcohol and an alcoholic. There are multiple videos on KZbin regarding this topic. And, as a believer in Jesus Christ, I recommend prayer to help you through this challenging moment in your life.

[@fantasiazplatkami]

@@VoxLesPaul I pray to God to maintain my strength not to contact him:( I'm not so much trauma bonded as I miss him physically (see him, touch him), but the personality and attutude to me is awful (criticizing me, putting me down, brushing off all my love and effort), plus he told me he doesnt want to be with me due to my (proclaimed by him) misdeamor. I dont want to humiliate myself out of my loneliness.

[@sinisterblister9981]

I have to admit, you do by far the best selfhelp channel for people suffering from narcissistic abuse. It seems you talk a lot by your own experience and that comes through pretty authentic. Thanks and well done!

[@barbiebythesea]

Self care..left my boyfriend 5 mos ago.. found myself tonite missing him.. drove by his house and his truck was gone, so my mind was whirring with where is he, is he with someone else?? OMG I have been doing so well.. so i searched on your site and found this video. Thank you 🙏🏻 for all your wisdom and sharing with all of us!! I can soothe myself tonite!!

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Barbie Boo,You deserve a good guy cause you are a precious 🌹🌹🌷🌹🌹 being 💓!

[@barbiebythesea]

@@oscarwilliamson1264 Thank you 🙏🏻 so do you!

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

@@barbiebythesea You are welcome my dearest 🌹🌷🌺🌹.I'm Oscar Williamson from the States.You?

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

@@barbiebythesea Which country are you from?

[@davidcoppotelli3957]

Don't do drive bys that's stalking someone. BAD

[@frankokline]

Thank you Stephanie! There are a lot of good relationship coaches and different people who make educational videos on personality disorders, or narcicism. But you are one of the best at explaining the narcisist In a clear way. You paint a picture for your subscribers, one that they have experienced first hand and can easily recognize in your description. You really help so many people like me. It feels good to hear someone explain the things I have experienced. You have given me immense relief from the bewilderment, confusion and hopeless dispair that she purposely left me with. This person has done things to me that I couldn't have the capacity to do to even my worst enemy. Which was so completely incomprehensible to me. But you have very clearly explained what I was dealing with and how to deal with it and avoid it in the future. I now know who and what she is and what to look out for as red flags in my future prospects for a partner. I am so grateful for you. There are only about 4 maybe 5 people that I have subscribed to on here who really seem to explain these things in a way that is so clear and easy to understand. It is so helpful for so many reasons and in so many ways. It's people like you that have made the over obsessing and endless consuming of searching for answers not necessary, because you have explained and have answered most of the questions I had very quickly. So many questions have been answered that obsessing or searching for answers is not needed because you have answered them already. You really bring a great deal of understanding and relief to people like me who have suffered from the toxicity and down right NEFARIOUS abuse of the narcisist. It has brought me immense levels of peace and healing that I can't even begin to explain. Without you and the few other people who are educating folks on the abuse that we have endured, I really don't know where I'd be. All I know is that it would likely not be good and I would be feeling completely lost still. I would likely be in a state of confusion shock and dispair. So for that I guess I just really want to say thank you for having this channel. Not only is it helping countless people more than some of us may even realize, but it has helped me heal and process the trauma of the unfathomable torment and abuse from the woman I thought I'd be with for the rest of my life, who turned suddenly and very abruptly into the exact opposite of the person I thought she was for seemingly no reason and without provocation. That's enough to confuse and polarise even the strongest most sane and rational minded person when they are caught off guard and taken by surprise by the deception of the unsuspected narcisist.

[@scottdeloach806]

The comment Stephanie made about being able to be transparent at the start of the relationship really hit home with me. Toxic partners cultivate this vulnerability to use it against us. What I felt was a revelation and blessing was eventually a curse.

[@roejohnson1230]

This talk hit the nail on the head for me. It’s what i realized and it’s what I’m working on due to a relationship where a guy admitted to selfishness and wanting a commitment and sex on his own terms. He apologized but the ruminating I’ve done is overwhelming. Again, it was amazing that he admitted to the sun is out. Whether he is definitely narcissistic and can actually change I don’t know. He does want to break his pattern. That’s what he admitted as well. But I was actually able to say have this. Selfishness is the source of a lot of our issues. Not all of them. But I was not good at setting boundaries. Yes I’ve been going through the motions that have been difficult to understand.

[@paulahealey548]

I feel like I am currently obsessed with trying to figure him out.. we haven’t broken up...yet.. but I am learning and trying to plan. It’s going to hurt bc I do love him... but I’m tired.. so tired..

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Paula Healey,Your lovely smile 😊 can make the news!

[@ricklopez4115]

My narcissistic wife literally got arrested a couple of weeks ago for domestic abuse. These videos have been important in moving on from her constant abuse. Not only has she shown she never loved me but actually has shown how little she cares for the kids.

[@aziebkaleab7617]

Girl I totally feel your pain. I just walked away from a 5 year relationship because I was just tired of being tired also ! Sent him a nice breakup text and blocked him on everything, been 4 days and not once I wanted to unblock him to say anything to him ! Just focus more on loving yourself and your goals ! You will be ok trust me !! Time heals

[@emmaharper860]

You will know. When you had enough. Because I loved myself was reason enough for me🥰

[@jannlewandowski5540]

I remember when I left my Fiancé after 5 years, I really suffered since I really LOVED him, but, I learned to love myself more. Everytime the phone rang,my heart would race. I changed my number, I got off Facebook, and moved a few years later. I heard he married a RICH woman 2 weeks after I discarded him. It took me over 2 years to get over the future faking & gaslighting. This was 11.3 years ago. I'm doing fine now. This is a great topic! Thank you, Stephanie. NEVER GO BACK TO A NARC!

[@spokenwordpoetries]

Amazing work, Stephanie! One thing that I would add is that we need to be able to tell OTHER people that this is not a normal relationship and to please respect that this is a situation where they should NOT give advice if they don't have the knowledge to do so. I also think that, when you deep dive to learn the lessons or the "golden nuggets" as you say, it takes longer to truly heal. I had people tell me that I should be over it by now, when I was just at the tip of the iceberg about trauma bonds and how I didn't recognize the red flags of abusive behavior because it was normalized through my teenage years. Now, I'm in a position to say that I've learned what I need to learn in order to circumvent people like this in future, and all of the time that I spent healing will benefit me for the rest of my life. Thank you for validating us and our experiences. Thank you for providing compassionate and truthful advice!

[@joanngross786]

Here I am over twenty-five years later still dealing with the after effects of a horrible relationship and marriage with a monster. The financial ruin is still present in my life, but with God's help I'm determined to dig out of this hole. Thank you Stephanie for some very good counsel.

[@ulricka2131]

Yes!!! That is why the Good Book tells us to renew our minds. Thank you Stephanie

[@sayusayme7729]

Grateful now after years of trying to understand outwardly when I truly needed to see how I allowed myself to accept the book I didn’t write. Thanks to everyone like you and seeing truth in my eyes. Heart 💜 breaks, heart heals what I can acknowledge as I unravel the pages and burn them all. New book that I’m writing with love.💚

[@deborahgane4497]

Thank you. This makes sense. I am always asking why is this taking so long (7 months on) as my other breakups didn’t seem to take so long t get over. As an older person, I think I got into it no stayed so as not to be alone for the rest of my life. But the cruelty he finally dished out when I needed support hurts so badly. I know now that I can be alone if I have to.. I have to learn to accept that possibility.

[@jadehalliday6636]

This is the reason why we keep going back!! We feel like nobody understands & as we feel riddled with shame or guilt, we keep our "relationship" dynamics a secret & the aftermath of those 😢🙁

[@jc8258]

I admire your courage ❤. I needed to hear this today. Thank you so much 💓 Tuesday January 26th 2021 9:50 a. m.

[@tootienottoofruitie1726]

Yes sooo important to start loving yourself.. I just purchased a sleep sound machine and it helps me breath more deeply when I hear the ocean etc. Everyone is different... but that's helping me to love myself

[@memorycelle]

The pandemic related issues we're all going through has definitely brought up things from the past.

[@bienfaitmboni]

This video just came in handy as I have just ended a 3 years relationship with someone I absolutely adored at some point and still do. It took me a longtime accepting that there wasn’t going to be a change no matter how hard I tried. The low blow for me was finding out he had been talking to someone for 1 year behind my back. Just very painful and sometimes seemed to lack empathy for me. It was a hard move for me but I could feel my body exhausted from it all. Thank you for the peps on how to handle the break up

[@lawsonmacdonald2207]

I’ve made these mistakes, this is so sad.

[@DL-vibes]

I don’t need someone to give me the world. I would love to build that world together, walking together and learning how to grow. I mean it’s not that hard right.

[@skbains86]

🙏 for teaching me how to ❤️ myself and move on from my toxic relationship with confidence and peace of mind.

[@free2bme604]

You are me ! I’m too authentic ! 20 years my husband passed suddenly in 2018 we did the heart work for love ! I took that into the wrong place and now I’m grieving heartbreak I never knew existed 😭

[@gia4957]

Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge to those of us who can't afford coaching. God I wish I had this knowledge 12 years ago. That is my biggest regret sometimes, that I can't get back those years unfortunately. When I go to that place I come back and watch your videos. You've helped me so much. You are such an amazing woman. 💞

[@kennethluiz4588]

Heloo do you need instant help

[@kennethluiz4588]

I can recommend you to a man who can help you like he did mine 💖 and it works without delay

[@kennethluiz4588]

Watsap him 💖

[@kennethluiz4588]

+234,81660,34660

[@lamnuck]

I definitely started feeling a lot better once I understood that it had nothing to do with me and that I was better off moving on knowing what to watch out for in the future

[@leslielester1183]

So true I’ve fell for this a thousand times glad I finally know what not to do!!

[@Solamoro]

Stephanie, This one hit home for me. I gave up my dream because I went through that roller coaster you described, and I’m getting my dream back, not my ex. Thanks for your help in explaining all this.

[@jucxox]

This is one of the most important videos I have ever watched.

[@lioydwilliams1850]

Janet Rose,I admire your lovely smile

[@chrispalmer3969]

the way you put this across, makes so much sense. Now I got shot of that waste of an excuse for a human, life can only get better for me. I did it the man when I left, kept very polite, showed no emotion, then went total no contact. For me its the financial abuse that's really done me. Now 3 yrs later I'm well on the way back up there. Self healing is the answer, and learn about myself. I just think nothing but pity for her. Karma go do your stuff, JOB DONE

[@VeggieBrah]

I've been marathoning these videos since yesterday and they have helped me realize that I was in a trauma bonding situation and to acknowledge that the healing process is going to take some serious time.

[@tinawilliford5330]

This is so my relationship right now. I got the shock of my life. These videos have helped me to realize he was a narcissist big time and how much he has lied. He has had several girlfriends after all he told me there would never be any one else. He continues to lie and manipulate me. I'm extremely devastated.

[@jc8258]

Tuesday January 26th 9:35 a. m. Good morning. I could use some positive affirmations. You have my undivided attention.

[@yehiaismail2451]

You nailed it. This is exactly what is happening to me

[@angelabolt8795]

Thank you. I needed this today. Had struggled for almost a year to find myself again after a terrible relationship with a narcissistic alcoholic. Have been doing really well....until today again. Thanks girl for all your guidance.

[@oscarwilliamson1128]

Angela Bolt,You deserves better

[@Curiosity978]

One of the most powerful and useful videos I have seen about how to do healing like a badass human being. Thank you ❤

[@stephmacedo139]

Perfect day that you posted this...went through a breakup the past week and this is exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you for your videos! Lots of love and light.

[@polyjb1]

Hi Stephanie. This is a video I save and often come back to. You lay this out so well. And for someone like me that was in a narc relationship with "her" for 8 years and never knew what it was until I educated myself right after, your work and others is gold. I am 2 years post break up and thriving. AND I have 3 young kids, 8, 6 and 3. I also use this video to explain to others including my own family what I went through. People just dont understand and that was often the hardest part of my initial healing. I love your work and continue to follow all of your videos. Thanks much. You have helped saved me. ❤

[@suzane3751]

TO THE ROW IN THE BACK THIS PERSON WITH NPD IS NOT YOUR TWIN FLAME OR SOUL MATE MMKAY, IT'S CALLED A TRAUMA BOND, DON'T DELUDE YOURSELF WITH THAT NONSENSE. XO

[@jemroxx8132]

Wow! Wished I found your channel sooner. I’ve been watching multiple KZbinrs regarding my situation and yours have been the most helpful, logical and make sense. You’re good! Thankful for u! Subscribed.

[@Janeal-Jones]

Thank you. I was trying to jump over all the emotions, but I’ll set with them and allow the time and processing.

[@oscarwilliamson1128]

Blue Ray Healing,You deserves better

[@jackidezell3401]

God works through other people to tell us what we need to hear! Awesome job!

[@angelaknox]

Perfect timing, ty!

[@4imee198]

x2

[@Shad0wC0mpany2]

x3

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Angela, Hope you are with a good man!

[@munirahlewin4694]

I NEEDED to see this video... we've been divorced almost a year and he is marrying his mistress in less than 30 days and it feel like a gut punch and a major set back in my healing. I had been with him almost 20 years and now have to co-parent with him as we have a 4 yo daughter. This video is definitely giving me some much needed tools to continue healing and moving on with my life.