My Autistic Son’s Journey with School

This week's episode is an update on how Dylan has been getting on at his new school. The challenges we have to face, the mistakes I made along the way, and what's keeping us positive!
We've made a few other episodes about schools and choosing the right one for Dylan, please go check them out:
Homeschooling? - • School Update - Part 2
Mainstream vs Special Needs School - • School Update - Part 3
What is the right school for Dylan - • Anxiety at School - Fi...
If you're new to my channel, welcome to the family, and thank you for watching our video. Here's a little bit about me, I am a wife, a mother of three beautiful children, and a former actress. Following my eldest son (Dylan)'s diagnosis of ASD, I threw myself into knowing all there was to know about Autism and how to help him. After 6 years of research, I wrote my first book 'Coming Home to Autism', with my friend and speech therapist, Rhian Grounds. My mission is to help support and inspire parents of special needs children!
Please feel free to write in our comments if you'd like to share your story or if have any questions regarding Autism.
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'Coming Home to Autism' book:
www.amazon.co.uk/Coming-Home-...
Social media:
Instagram - / taraleniston
Facebook - / cominghometoautism
Website - cominghometoautism.com/
Business enquiries:
[e-mail]
Video Producer:
Tiara Westlake www.kamukami.com/
Music:
Himalayas by Mona Wonderlick / monawonderlick
Creative Commons - Attribution 3.0 Unported - CC BY 3.0
Free Download / Stream: bit.ly/_himalayas
Music promoted by Audio Library • Himalayas - Mona Wonde...
Riviera by Smith The Mister smiththemister.bandcamp.com
Smith The Mister bit.ly/Smith-The-Mister-YT
Free Download / Stream: bit.ly/al-riviera
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Mainstream school: a regular school, where your child may get support from special educational needs staff if they need it.
Special school: a school for children with special educational needs.
A SENCo, or special educational needs coordinator: the school teacher who is responsible for assessing, planning, and monitoring the progress of children with special needs.
Education, health, and care plan (EHC plan, or EHCP): a document from your local council which says what education and health needs your child has and what support they should get.

[@KatMatthews91]

Your channel has helped my husband and I tremendously. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts ♥️ ps. No shame on bottles with your baby girl! My son also loved is bottle!

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you x

[@lindahayter9300]

Thanks for the update Tara. I wish you guys luck with moving, yet again... I think you are handling all of it very well. My hat's off to you! Blessings.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you 🥰

[@pollytude1577]

This tech school sounds like an amazing idea for Dylan! He might like it a lot! Fingers crossed for everything! x

[@iristoth335]

This week was a challenge for me, I was told that my youngest of 4 with autism would fit better in another group. a group where children were younger as he is. that took some switching and brought stress and worries with it. but he did a great job. and I am busy arranging another kind of taxi transport for him, he is now always in the taxi for 1.5 hours. and that causes him to arrive at school over-stimulated and tired. which is not nice if you have to be at school all day long. and I found an occupational therapist this week because he is a stimulus processing disorder. and I hope we can help him better later. tomorrow the new week starts and I hope we will have a great week. I really hope this for you too. ❤

[@juliemadden6857]

If anyone can make this move happen in 5 weeks my darling girl, you can. So proud of you and all that you have achieved and what you have had to cope with. I think this You Tube Channel is not only good for helping others, but I also think it helps you too. You seem to have the most amazing followers. xx

[@Mariliaobr]

I’m so glad Dylan likes his school ❤️ We mums appreciate the words of encouragement xx

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you angel warrior mum x

[@sylviig2737]

Your videos always give me so much reassurance. Thank you for that 😊 I am keeping everything crossed for your house move. Hope it will be as easy as possible and goes smoothly Xx

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you so much xox

[@sarahchips]

I have to comment again thank you for sharing all of yourself. These videos are so honest it feels like watching your best mate telling you what's going on THANKYOU XX

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you so much xxx

[@reinierogutierrez8876]

Moms are really superheroes. My wife has a lot on her plate as well. I don't know how she manages to power through!

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you x

[@aimeeseattle]

I just found your channel/video! I feel your struggle! I like your calm energy , i just like clicked and subscribed to your channel. Last year my youngest (autistic)son started school at 6 yrs. old. It was so hard because the school system here made big mistakes with us. I love your vids. Thanks for sharing your journey. I'm glad you posted about the bottle, it's ok, and my son is still using a sippy cup. Introvert mom of 4 sons (2 autistic) , enjoying making youtube friends, learning from others, while trying to grow my channel. Hugs and God Bless!

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you so pleased you found me xox

[@aimeeseattle]

@@ComingHometoAutism Love your videos, keep inspiring and stay strong!

[@44BabyB]

Omg moving again?! You guys are so strong 💪🏽 and you give us so much inspiration and strength! We love you 💜💜💜 All the best with the packing 😘

[@ComingHometoAutism]

I know we had to move in to a rental as our new house was not ready 🙈 now hoping to move in 5 weeks time x

[@ruthwishart8645]

Tara.....you are a mum in a million! You’re an angel honestly! I love your honesty! Keep doing these videos you are such an inspiration!

[@ComingHometoAutism]

🥰

[@BenKlassen1]

Lovely. Thanks for the update. Cheers.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

❤️

[@emmanaidoo1485]

💜 hugs to you guys! Keep strong. The children are doing well, you guys are so positive. Hope the house moves along swiftly. Can't wait to see more. 💜🥰😙

[@ComingHometoAutism]

🥰

[@catalina141107]

I came across your videos a few months ago and have loved them since. I really need a mentor like you, just to be able to say to the school to be a bit more soft as it's the first day. I am struggling so much with my son school. It's a main stream and he has a plan but they really don't want him and putting up so many bars for him. I need to be strong like you. He had the biggest meltdown in the morning and didn't want to go to school then I left to take the kids to school and 30 mins later phoned telling me he was ready and had to turn around again for him. Your such a strong woman and I can see you are doing sooo well with Dylan xxx

[@ComingHometoAutism]

You got me here if you need me x

[@catalina141107]

Just love your videos you really say it how it is xx

[@1BadRAMLimited]

Thank you for the pointers and sharing your experience. My son started pre k this year and has had a rough day for the past month. He is finally getting a new teacher and class room setting to help him.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

You got this!

[@alexmandin6279]

Well I do wish your kid the best of luck as he grows up Me myself I was diagnosed with autism at age 5 and I’m 22 now never been mainstreamed can’t hold a full time job never could maintain a romantic relationship more so because I was never exposed to any social circles I’m definitely not that intelligent not in like a idiot way I’m still a reasonable person and with all of that I been dealing with a lot of my personal life every day

[@ComingHometoAutism]

❤️

[@rashasifi7667]

Good luck

[@irmasandoval7008]

Hi. Thanks for sharing. If you were put in a mainstream class at spme point do you think you could have benefited more or less? I appreciate you sharing.

[@alexmandin6279]

@@irmasandoval7008 I don’t know it depends on how other people are with me if I have been taken against for having a disability then probably not

[@fionascheibel977]

I could relate to Dylan needing to go to that new school, myself last week. I was supposed to start attending a 3 hour social engagement group on Wednesday afternoons. I hardly slept the night before. I was terrified about a million possible disaster senarios that i was running through my head. I felt so sick the next morning due to lack of sleep and anxiety so i messaged my support worker and said i couldnt go to the group. He said that was OK. We could try again this coming week. He would meet me at the community centre about 15 minutes before the start time and we could go in together and chat until the group starts and then he will walk me into the meeting room and leave once i feel safe and if i can manage to stay for half an hour that would be OK by him. To go from basically minimal contact with people on a social basis for the last 6 months to expecting myself to hang out with strangers for 3 hours is a big ask. But the idea was if i got into this program now for the last 6 weeks it would be easier for me to return to it when it starts up again next year in around late februrary. I dont like being social as a general rule but i do understand i cant hide at home forever. But strangers are scary.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

❤️

[@maj1636]

Good luck for the moving process. I KNOW it's gonna be alright. I mean come on !!! you've handled worse than that. 💪💪Strong mama💪💪

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thanks darling x

[@chelseasonkar2907]

I’ve seen this one before but I needed to surf your videos this week Tara and this one got me blurry eyed, Aussie Mama Bear Single Parent from CBR Australia, my little guy is nearly 4, NG Tube fed 5 times a day - ARFID / EoE (all the allergens removed) and AuDHD (flagged for ADHD and Autism Diagnosis), I’ve been home with him since birth, can’t go to school due to medical situation, I’ve been in survival mode for a few years and accepted it, that when the time for ‘this too shall pass’ will arrive naturally’, but this last 2 weeks behaviours have flared and has been the cherry on the cake. Hearing you say it gets better is what gets me through, we are in our transformation chapter right now, but it’s the one I’ve had to surrender the most in and therefore trust more than I ever had before and working on autopilot. If I had a dollar for how often I play Coming Home To Autism videos in the background to self soothe, I would be a wealthy lady ❤️ We did get a lot of green lights Health is improving this week but it’s slow and the maintenance is … intense, finding time to restore myself is challenging right now and have to microdose it to get through this phase. I am also incredibly grateful, I am stronger and wiser, and more equipped, but it’s the maintenance over long periods that feels almost cruel that anyone would have to go that alone like I have. I have a great soul family but everything I do on my own. I love that you wave the holistic flag too, you are the first person online I have seen that has openly shared this and I feel so resonated by this, soul sister vibrations lol I just wanted to say thank you for giving me strength when I feel my enormous cup has run dry. Much love from Down Under 🌏💕🦋💐🙏🏾

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you so much for your lovely words. I’m sending you so much love you’re doing so well and they’re forget it xox

[@hyperlyeverafter]

Our daughter (ADHDer) is 4 and still enjoys the comfort of milk in a bottle (whilst watching a screen only for a short time before moving onto the next thing :p). Sooooo many things stress her out in a day, I'm not about to refuse her this one small pleasure (especially when she seems to function like a younger child a lot of the time). After a particularly hard day/days, judgement from the public is just horrible. Yes, I've found only one Primary School I want our daughter in (supports every child better and our daughters needs). We will move to any suburb to find the best fit school. Her Dad (ADHDer) had a very difficult experience during his time in school. Best wishes from Australia! Thanks for the vids, they help me get through all the hard stuff.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Oh thank you pleased to be on this journey with you x

[@abbystephens5516]

I have high functioning Aspergers and I am 20 years old and over the coarse of that time I learned that people with Aspergers have a learning disability which means that it takes longer for us to pick things up which explains a lot because I have struggled a lot in school

[@carolanngibb3035]

You and you're husband are tremendous parents,My daughter is waiting in a referral to see if my grandson is Autistic.The education therapist was at his nursery and the said that he was doing really well.She felt as though there was something just not right,It's his speach he hadn't hasn't said a word yet, I guess we will have to wait for the he referral,It doesn't matter anyway he's my grandson it's so we can learn to see the world through his eyes,

[@livsephton9]

I wasn't officially diagnosed with Autism until I was 16 so I went to a mainstream school for both primary and secondary and I had support and I was absolutely fine. Obviously everyones experience will be different though

[@Wildernessadventuresoz]

Goodness sounds like our family to a T. You cannot miss a thing with our kiddos

[@jujuel.978]

You are doing a great job! I have questions: What are the activities that Dylan is doing after the school? Does he feel boring all the time?

[@pmhairdesign7548]

I just love Lukas hair 🤣

[@ComingHometoAutism]

❤️

[@theurbanpanther5303]

Ma'am, I have 2 year old boy with autism. Your videos are so inspiring. Can you please explain how Olivia handled bullying because she was speaking so fast that I could not even understand.

[@asmacooking2332]

Hi Tara I love you videos I’m learning so much of them please can you talk about deling learnig proses sense he start the school and the thing that you did and . I m having difficult with my son on his learning

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Sure I’ll cover it in another video x

[@jennygibbons1258]

Amazing 👍🏾

[@ally-mae9636]

Hi Tara! I really look forward to watching your videos. I have a 4 year old son who was diagnosed with ASD a year ago and he is currently in Reception. I wanted to ask how old was Dylan when he learnt how to read? My son is confident with knowing his letters and numbers and is starting to blend sounds together, writing is a different non-existent story! Since the pandemic, my son is glued to the screen and doesn't have any interest in reading every night. Do you have any tips?

[@ComingHometoAutism]

hey there dylan was about 7 when he learned to read a little bit then about 8,9 and now 10 heis intererested in it. i got books based on his interests x

[@TeenagePregnancy15]

Hi, I’ve not long ago started at a special school myself I started in September, i do much better there, I started there in september until mid October 2022 but then I didn’t go again until Jan 2023, because of lots of issues with the school

[@lizgephart2040]

What a beautiful person and a mother you are. You make great moves with his struggles. I have a step son Autistic and he repeats words and wants everyone to understand what he means and we try to understand him but he is acting like a 2 -3 years old most of the time. Dylan is amazing so advanced so happy for you guys. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@oliviaann5535]

Tara it’s not your fault you forgot about mentioning lunch you had so many over worry’s on your mind.

[@alevboyaci9031]

Love you Tara! ♥️ can I ask for your opinion my 5 year old is non verbal atm and at school (mainstream) due to special school not having “space” she’s not eating who do I talk too and what do I do about this as she is only doing 4 hours for now but what do I do? ♥️

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Hmm ok firstly the specialist school should have space is her ehcp plan up to date . If you can get it named on their that she needs specialist school they have to make space for her. If she is non verbal she might be anxious and there for both eating. Is really push for her to be in a specialist setting they are trained in understanding non verbal children and also can help with with food issues . Let me know how you get on xox

[@alevboyaci9031]

@@ComingHometoAutism thank you very much! I shall do

[@alevboyaci9031]

@@ComingHometoAutism also I had put down a different special school but it was out of the Borough to where I live but I did speak with the send team to state I wanted her to go to a local special school which is nearer and I’m still waiting 😔, as I have to also consider her safety due to dad (her dad ) being violent towards me so I left the relationship and now living at my mums

[@gigimargal9234]

Im so anxious I was just told he needs a setting from 7am till 3pm and he is 4 and i dont know how he will manage I feel terrible his first day is next week and I feel panicky and pregnant is not helping.. so im tuning myself into all these videos to see what I should be expecting ☹☹

[@ComingHometoAutism]

❤️

[@laibahhussain1694]

He will be good like they I’ve got autism too it’s so hard for me I’m at a special school

[@laibahhussain1694]

Good for him

[@abbystephens9766]

It’s crazy to think that her and Andrew are separating. I am glad though she’s doing what is best for both of them.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you . We just grew apart x

[@saffrich647]

Hi hope all is well, did Dylan use to do scripting when he was younger?

[@ComingHometoAutism]

What do you mean scripting? X

[@saffrich647]

Repeating lines from his favourite movies or cartoons. You might know scripting as (delayed) Echolalia.

[@5p674]

How can anyone run a school with so many kids with so many individual special needs? Amazing!

[@ComingHometoAutism]

They are amazing

[@juantwo322]

What therapy did U give him around the age of 3 ? Thanks

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Speech therapy and OT in my video where I talk about Dylans journey I talk more on this x

[@Allthingsmisspriceless]

What kind of help did you get after he’d been diagnosed? And does he have mild autism?

[@ComingHometoAutism]

He was non verbal. I have a video on all the therapies I did with Dylan if that helps you x

[@savannaali5964]

I have my son he is 10 years old,the the school did assement every year for him year before, but they didn’t diagnose him but I told the psychologist has he Autism? Then just they wrote down what I said, we moved him another school, now they said I think he has autism.I feel may be to late to help I feel always blaming my self, and always think about him, now in school time he always wake up late and no doing in thing like going toilet he is always no ready, Iam really straggling with him I I have my my little is three years old , need to be ready to getting to school. Then when I saw him no care just shutting him but then I feel sad how I can help him to to understand simple things he is no care. I ask him if need help for clothes or any but always say I don’t want and staying no doing anything.

[@richardphieler7737]

My Time in the school was not easy with autism, the other Children was not good to me.❤❤❤❤

[@ComingHometoAutism]

I’m sorry it was tough for you

[@richardphieler7737]

Its okay i have a beautiful family and friends

[@Dina-ew1pk]

My kids all were on the bottle till 4 or 5 so I don't aee anything wrong with it 😁

[@ComingHometoAutism]

🥰

[@voxpopuli5663]

Regular school is not for throwing tantrums, spitting at people etc. A school that is geared for autistic kids is needed or an aide to manage behaviour

[@thefoxplayz4009]

Hi

[@pmhairdesign7548]

The apples 🤣 I'm dieing from laughter

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Seriously can’t find one that has not been eaten lol

[@fmsltd9502]

My son does that too

[@user-qv5lw2eu6k]

Sister I want to know wish school you son go and best one because my son have autustic and study on normal school with shadow teacher.. But planning go to other shool

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you my friend x

[@user-qv5lw2eu6k]

@@ComingHometoAutism thank you sister.. But really want an advice. For best autustic school for children on london

[@oliviaann5535]

It sounds like Dylan has a god send of a teacher that is for sure key. Dylan could work for NASA it something they did actually have many autistic people working for them. I have a friend who dose games design at uni he loves it ! .

[@maryquigleytimekeepersanti4541]

Choose your battles moms. To the mom shamers, you don't see an 18 year old walking around with a bottle.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Thank you so true x

[@user-wl1jw6xq2h]

I love bananas

[@sommersonne9466]

haha mum shaming because a three year old has a bottle! I can't keep up with what is taboo and what not. I would probably have been shamed for breastfeeding our ASD son until he was 4 and half, lucky I don't care.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Absolutely you do what’s right for you and well done for Breast feeding xx

[@user-id1dm3tw7c]

Didn't you realize, your face is very similar to Lady Diana.

[@ComingHometoAutism]

Wow such a compliment . When I was younger I was told my mannerisms were a bit like hers . Thank you for making my day x

[@tjbishop8823]

Go big or go home