My Partner And I Planned A Vacation, His Mom Demanded To Come And He Let Her r/Relationships

[@mac533]

Story 3: For the people saying that the mother could have the OP charged with kidnapping, I would love to see that court case. Mom: OP kidnapped my kids. Judge: I see. What happened? Mom: Well, I was leaving my kids alone in an unlocked house as I normally do...

[@toothless3835]

Seriously, everyone defending this mother are crazy. I'd have called the police and informed them, this lady keeps leaving her kids by themselves to go do something.

[@hothotheat3000]

Mom is the partner. You’re the mistress. You know what to do.

[@xelectrix]

She already had a bag pack...at his apartment. And what happened to the mom not wanting them to go because she's worried about his car?

[@BruinPhD2009]

@@xelectrix Logic and long term memory are never the strong suits of people like the BF and his mom.

[@hothotheat3000]

Exactly. OP would do well to leave this guy. A Latino man is not going to go NC with his mom. This will continue for the rest of his life until his mom finally drops dead.

[@missmoxie9188]

That is brilliant I’m going to use thar

[@ElCid48]

he may be 20 but he act like he is 6. run and do not walk away. run and wish him the best in the future but you are not going to be in it.

[@veezopolis]

The Mom in the second story is so full of shit. She's not cutting off contact, she's definitely had sex with the guy, she likes the attention, she will continue the relationship, she won't leave the job, and she won't tell the wife. She laughed during the confrontation, what else can we expect

[@kashiialcuin1688]

Idk to me it did sound like the mom was in a power imbalance relationship. She was saying things like "it'd be awkward " the man is clearly old enough to be her father if his wife is in her 50s and 60s he is too and mom is still in her 30s. Boss is a creep. It's easy at 15 to blame your mom because for you she's an adult but she was taken advantage of. The fact that she felt she had to do it at work too... makes me think she's a little afraid of this guy.

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

@@kashiialcuin1688 But all the more reason for her to look for a new job, hopefully where they won't call them for a reference. The mom just staying with the status quo won't cut it anymore.

[@toothless3835]

@@kashiialcuin1688 Woman was 34 years old when the affair started with a 15 year old kid. If she had a problem, she could've gone to HR. HR doesn't like that shit because they wouldn't want her to sue the company. The only power imbalance is the one she allowed at this point. If she was in her 20's or just out of high school, I'd agree with this more but she was a grown ass woman who knew exactly what she was doing.

[@wldr292]

Story 3: Justified AH , those kids could’ve been actually kidnapped or worse.She couldn’t even lock the door?!?!

[@tandelogan2825]

Exactly, I don't even think they are an AH, they are trying to make their friend wake up and see what they are actually doing. Life is harsh and can end badly, sometimes people need harsh lessons to understand that..

[@WhitneyDahlin]

Yep. The kids would be better off if mom did have a heart attack. I really hate reddit sometimes. She was justified and did the RIGHT thing! The mom did deserve to feel that fear. She needed to be taught a lesson. She clearly doesn't even actually want her kids she just doesn't want her ex husband to have them.

[@HeiwaTori]

yeah, I agree, was shocked to see so many AH comments... yeah its an awful thing to do, but op tried to tell the mum & she wasnt listening, sometimes people need an ice cold bucket of reality to be poured over them, maybe now she'll lock her goddamn door

[@Iflie]

I fear those people siding with the mom who leaves her young kids home alone with the doors unlocked are doing that themselves and projecting. She'd doing it all the time, she has been warned, she could lose custody at the snap of a finger as the husband is already wanting the kids and may have send out a P.I. The friend was doing her a favor that will lead to her keeping her kids. Same as that dad that took his baby out of his wife's car while she was leaving it alone at the store. There is a saying if you don't learn the easy way, you have to learn the hard way.

[@mcspike5003]

Exactly. Not only that, but the friend is taking the kids out of danger(being home alone) and apparently they know him so they're with a trusted person. All the "you're the ah for making the mother think her actions caused something that's completely possible without the friend faking it" like he's already talked to her multiple times what else is there to do apart from let her keep putting her kids at risk? I hate reddit sometimes man

[@rclark8688]

The mom was definitely in the wrong for leaving her kids the way she did. However the father taking the kids out of the car is fake kidnapping because those are his kids. The friend taking the kids out of the house into their car is real kidnapping. Fake kidnapping is if OP simply called the mother and said her kids were missing, only for them to be safe and sound once she returned. Then maybe you could say NTA. But even if it was to teach a lesson, it was still a real crime. If she thinks the mother is unfit enough to be a parent that they feel the need to commit crimes, then they should have talked to CPS. There were so many other options that could have been taken.

[@Iflie]

@@Octchild85 Right now the dad is an unknown factor, he may want the kids but he moved an hour away so probably is not seeing them a lot. Mom seems to love the kids but be an idiot about their safety and in shooting the messenger. I hope whoever they end up with they will get proper love and care.

[@Iflie]

@@mcspike5003 Reddit can be really emo and skewed towards women. But then they are not obligated to be fair.

[@Iflie]

@@rclark8688 They were at the end of the road, laws have to be very strict but morally he did nothing wrong, except maybe not alerting the father about her unsafe home. He wanted her to keep the kids because she's his friend. There were no other options that would have allowed him to do that. Technically he took abandoned kids into his care while locating their mother. It doesn't really matter if they were in their own home.

[@yamairad1]

Story 3. Maybe the kids are better of with dad.

[@PlasticBluVentRabbit]

Story 3… christ Maybe the dad should have custody. Between mom leaving the kids with an unlocked door and “teach a lesson” OP just KIDNAPPING THEM to prove a point, i’m hard pressed to believe dad shouldn’t have the kids At least they’d be away from this mess

[@simonO712]

Apparently OP's comments reveal the dad to be an abusive drunk, so that's off the table.

[@khaleesireyna731]

The mom is lucky that it was just OP, so no, I don't feel any sympathy. She wants to be a neglectful parent, she can learn the hard way what that costs. And honestly, the amount of people defending the mom because her poor fee fees where hurt and she was scared because *gasp* her actions could've had consequences need to get a grip. Let's stop enabling bad parenting.

[@MisaoMeowchan]

Final story NTA, they tried to have a conversation with her about the dangers of what she was doing and she blew them off. Go straight to the father and let him know what the mother is doing the kids deserve better

[@jr5557]

The OP can have a point and still be an ass taking the kids out of the house was a asshole thing to do. They should have just went right to the father

[@MooncrafterUTAU]

@@jr5557 Someone else said after reading the comments, OP revealed that the dad is an abusive alcoholic. She was trying to get her friend to shape up before the kids get sent to a WORSE situation

[@jr5557]

@@MooncrafterUTAU ok and? Op is still an ass somebody who actually wanted to help their friend would offer to baby sit for her to run errands not kidnap her kids

[@mindyschocolate]

Agreed. She should be thanking OP on bended knee. Anyone else would have called CPS and daddio would have gotten custody hands down. What mom did was neglect. You can’t leave kids that young home alone. End of story. She still has her kids, and she’s hopefully learned her lesson. She should absolutely be kissing OP’s ass right now.

[@mindyschocolate]

@@MooncrafterUTAU yup. Friend defined needs to get down on bended knee and thank OP. OP seems to be the only person who cares about those kids.

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

I’m pretty sure this mum is the type to be asking when they’re having children yet. But also makes sure to inject herself into their private lives that it’s physically impossible for them to, you know, have children.

[@blix_xo]

You just described my MiL. It's gonna be a year that they moved in for a better life from where they were. They weren't supposed to be here that long. Pfft. And she has been crying she wants to be a grandma again cause her nieces and nephews are baby cannons. 😂 Sorry lady, I can't have intimacy with your son when you barge in our bedroom like you own the place.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

Mark used to have a history of reading stories without ending updates and then that changed to his reading stories that had updates with endings. Now, he is back to reading stories that have updates with no endings again. I am losing faith in Mark and his stories which is sad because I love listening to his interpretations of them but I only have so much time in a day to watch these videos so ................

[@misscheesecake7282]

@@thomasjoseph5876 real life ..sometimes there's updates but no clear ending...mark can't magic one up.

[@maez4718]

2nd story; it's always such a shame when children have to parent their mom or dads because the parents are infantile.

[@whims6278]

Exactly what I was thinking

[@tayflowers13]

As a daughter from a Hispanic mom I get it. I have had to work so hard to create boundaries, the guilt triping is is real. I can tell you the mom did it on purpose for sure.

[@amberleeannalee1999]

Yeah it’s the Catholic guilt indoctrination. My mom tried that on me and I fought her every step of the way. I’m not Hispanic or anything but she tried it never worked on me.

[@tennesseedogpack]

Spanish mommas boys are a dime a dozen and woe to any women who gets knocked up by one

[@LordBison98]

Story 3: NTA the mother NEEDED that wake up call. Sure, it may have been harsh, but why couldn't she at least lock the door? Or call her friends? Like, please, think more about what can actually happen. Come on, she doesn't even lock the door!

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

Locking the doors would've been a no-brainer. Other thing is now you have delivery services for groceries so it's not as big a deal to just schedule a delivery as you need things. As a kid I was left home alone a lot, but I had the understanding of keeping the doors locked and not opening for strangers. The eight yr old should be capable of understanding that.

[@lindaouellette6656]

Third story: MOM!!!! Wouldn’t be having a “panic attack” if she wasn’t leaving a 5 and an 8 year old alone for even 5 minutes, ANYTHING can happen in a blink, all the YTA people should be checked up on from CPS!!! Damn.😢

[@YinYangAngel55]

Story 1: 5:25 "he wasnt going to be allowed to come" Isnt he an adult? He should have put his foot down

[@AndyyWithAY]

If my BF/husband ever vetoed me to bring his mummy on our vacay, I'd send him back to her house. 1. Why can't they take OP's car? Does she not have one. 2. If his car is "unsafe", WTF is mummy going to do? Is she a mechanic? Are tools in her pack?

[@Azulakayes]

You are employing logic on a situation that has none. There are crazy women who have a phantom umbilical cord attached to their sons and there are weak men who are used to mommy dearest making all decisions for them. It is hopeless. The only logical step is for OP to break up, the momwife is too powerful force of nature to go up against yet there are lots of normal men without such baggage who are available. Some battles arent worth it.

[@janfick7260]

When OP said that the mom was worried they would break down somewhere my first thought was 'So what's an old lady with a big bag of clothes going to do about a broken car'

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

Nothing, except add drama. Lol, maybe she's going to protect her son's virginity 😆 Clearly OP is a third wheel in this relationship.

[@sgm8265]

Right. And I'm sorry but she wasn't going to let him leave? No girl, he chose to let her tag along. He is too far gone and will require years of therapy.

[@TsukiKageTora]

Honestly the story 3: NTA. She doesn’t do the necessary protection for those kids, she was lucky it was just a lesson and not an actual reality. Every time I leave the house, we lock the door. Every time I leave the house for work (I’m home alone right up till I leave for work) I lock the door and the doggie door, despite my mom coming home within 30 minutes to an hour after I leave. It takes just but one minute… and she needed this lesson to realize you can’t leave your kids home alone nor leaving the door unlocked. Tf

[@jimdob6528]

The only reason the friend is the jerk here is because she’s putting her friend before the kids and unless the father is abusive then HE needs to have custody of these kids and the friend should have reported this.

[@TsukiKageTora]

@@jimdob6528 I would have told him point blank that she keeps the doors unlocked and she leaves the kids home alone to do errands

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

How is she NTA. She committed a literal felony.

[@mogulmade]

Story 2: I would tell the wife anonymously. And befriending the wife!? That mom is a POS.

[@Jacuzziuzi]

It would be funny if that if the friend charged OP with kidnapping and it comes to light she be leaving her kids at home and the dad gets custody

[@ohnooffwego]

It would kind of be the best result. Get a deranged Karen that kidnaps kids off the streets and an unfit mother loses her kids. Two birds with one stone.

[@tyron2854]

Mom needed to learn a lesson, good for the friend 👍

[@jenniferrichards2122]

That cheating mother is just the worst kind of trash. She laughed about it to her own daughter. Befriended the wife? Holy hellfire. OP should have a friend of a friend send her a message. That way it is not on her phone and the wife is still notified.

[@H.P._Lovecrafts_Beloved_Cat]

Kids can and have gone missing within seconds of being out of sight. If she thinks it’s okay to leave children that young alone in an unlocked house for 5 minutes, then maybe she shouldn’t have custody. I definitely don’t think OP went about it the right way, but you just can’t overlook the danger the friend routinely puts her children in.

[@TheFlyontheWall]

How about OP tells the friend's ex about the kids being left alone so he have custody.

[@Yume10605]

Thank you. I could only see not doing that if he was abusive

[@Yume10605]

@Timothy Robertson I take it your agreeing

[@vulpixle9659]

OP mentions in comments that the kids father was a alcoholic and abusive

[@Yume10605]

@Timothy Robertson no problem

[@Yume10605]

@@vulpixle9659 then yeah don't contact the father but maybe get in touch with her family.

[@lya9677]

LOL This is why I absolutely Love Mark Narrations And I quote ''Let's have another story. And our next story is gonna come from ''whatever'' titled, Am I The A-Hole, for Fake Kidnapping My Friend's Kids (Mark- Oh my word!!!!????!!!) Dude is so genuine You can't help but love/like his channel

[@brittkeller4979]

All the comments on the last story assume that OP went from 0 to 100 first strike. Op never mentions how many times she warned her friend about the dangers to her kids caused by her actions. Maybe she just got fed up with being ignored, or brushed off and went for the shock value of what could happen to the kids if a stranger figured out the door was unlocked. Unfortunately, sometimes people have to learn hard lessons, before they actually take notice and get their shit together. But, if that is a pattern of leaving her kids like this, then maybe the father is a better candidate to take the kids. Maybe Op is better to let that happen, and maybe she can get the friend to wake up to herself, get into therapy and figure out why she does what she does.

[@ciderxera4963]

I was really proud of OP in story 3. The friend wouldn't listen, so she showed her exactly what could've happened, except the friend was lucky it wasn't a pedophile who was observing her behavior and then actually kidnapping them. It's Chaotic good if I've ever seen it. Although, maybe the friend's kids are better off with the dad. It only takes one fuck up for her to never see her kids again because she couldn't be bothered to either ask for help or take them with her

[@kyuuchat]

I'm going to go with a NTA for story 3. She's leaving her very young kids alone in a house that's UNLOCKED. She deserved the wakeup call OP gave her, regardless of how harsh and cruel it seems.

[@holeymcsockpuppet]

Story 3: YTA, but OP did the right thing. Pain is the only thing that modifies behavior. Sometimes being an AH, even being cruel, is the right thing to do...even if it costs you a friendship.

[@aparnarai3708]

I think I remember one of such stories where mom was overprotective of her son and was very toxic towards his dad(as they both had divorced) His fiance and he eloped to actually fake the wedding and tell her they eloped cause she basically wasn't letting them invite anyone (All this was written from Fiance's perspective) The mother crashed on their honeymoon and they couldn't do the "cuddling" cause the mom, without prior notice came and started staying in the room next to them for their whole stay I got further information from the comments which said that both of them actually had to part ways cause the son won't stop being mamma's boy and the mom kept on throwing temper tantrums every time they tried involving the son's dad and his step mother in any function. Can't believe people like such exist Too much attachment leads to resentment

[@teenalot1235]

Story 3 reminds me of the "Karen name" story. OP advised her friend, everyone called OP a soft AH, the friend almost cut contact with OP backed off with a vow to NEVER get involved with that sitch. Years later OP's friend's daughter was getting bullied, OP's friend brought it up again, and she said, nahhhhhhh leave me out of this. OP's friend learnt the hard way, and they had to kinda change her name. OP is trying to be a good friend showing tough love. IMO NTA, she needs to understand that worse CAN happen especially in a custody battle or in life. Me personally if I were the mum, I would understand what my friend is tryna show/tell me. Sometimes the only way to learn is the hard way.

[@aniko7125]

Story 3: Justified AH It seems like this is habitual for OP’s friend and she will not listen because “nothing has happened”. It would be easy for someone with nefarious intentions to observe her behavior and snatch these children. That being said, OP needs to tell the husband or at least tip him off to what’s happening. He could observe it for himself. At this point her friend seems like a lost cause and the children’s safety comes first.

[@wendyhadley2764]

🚩🚩🚩 I remember a story similar to this where the mother started crying about being afraid and boyfriend ends up sleeping in the mother's room, I don't remember the details but I would be afraid of that happening the next time my boyfriend and I went somewhere.

[@Tijggie82]

It is truly irresponsible to leave the kids alone and people can just walk in. I remember a story about a young girl being ambushed in her own home by someone who was able to get in. Sure, it's a horrible, horrible feeling for the mom, but not as horrible as when the kids would truly have been kidnapped. I never want to see that happen to anyone.

[@sej04]

Story 3: OP should testify for the father to get full custody.

[@AndyyWithAY]

If OP has no where else to go she definitely needs to be cautious. It's easy to say tell the wife and that would be morally right, but if doing this means OP is going to be on the streets, she needs to proceed cautiously. That comment saying that was the best one and really applicable to reality not a fantasy world where everything is perfect

[@peteranon8455]

I know, right? I mean, of course it's the right thing to do, but OP is under no obligation to burn her world down if she's not ready to support herself.

[@robertx8020]

Ok, let's remember this for EVERY story where cheating is a thing and the OP might be caught in the middle! But don't start complaining when your partner cheats on YOU and half the world knows, but nobody is telling you!

[@akl2k7]

TBH, it's kind of like that story where the OP had an inkling that her husband was cheating, and found out it was with his stepmom and stepsis. She played her cards well, got her affairs in order, and divorced the jerk, then revealed to both the ex's brother-in-law and father that their wives were cheating with him. I remember a youtuber commenting that it was scummy of her to not tell the BIL right away, but still, sometimes you need to wait a little bit to minimize the blowback, especially with such volatile info.

[@wildwikedwanderer1208]

Story 3: NTA better a fake kidnapping than an actual kidnapping. Goddamn hero is what OP is. They should prolly tell the ex husband that this woman is leaving the kids home alone

[@thesmirkingcheshire6936]

What really blows my mind in the last story that nobody seems to have noticed is that the mom is 20 and she has an 8 and 5 year old. She had her first kid at 12.

[@randomusername3873]

So, you know when people are like "you shouldn't blame the affair partner" The mother in the second story went out of her way to befriend the woman whose husband was cheating with her and constantly spent time with her for years while banging her husband. Now when she'll find out the trauma will be significantly worst. How can someone defend people like this "She said she didn't want to" she also said she would stop banging the guy, her word doesn't mean much

[@robertx8020]

And the ppl saying :" she might lose her job"? so what? since when should cheating have no consequences? Or is it because it's OPs MOTHER? Maybe if ot had been OP's father things would be different?

[@j.j.juggernaut9709]

When people say that they clearly mean affair partners who had no idea they were just a side piece, which happens quite often. It clearly does not apply here

[@akl2k7]

Yeah, if the affair partner knows about the wife/gf or finds out about her (or him) and still stays in the relationship, they're enabling the cheater and disrespecting both his relationship and his spouse. I'd say it's kind of like someone giving drugs to a drug addict or alcohol to an alcoholic.

[@Maree2505]

In story 3, the funny part is that the so called "friend" was on her way to her friends house. She could have easily done what one of the commenters said and watch the kids for half an hour while the Mum goes and runs her earns.

[@taniaodige3369]

What’s funny is is that the if the friend hadn’t just so happened to be going over to her friends house then the kids would’ve been there alone. For several minutes. With the doors unlocked. And it would’ve happened again and again and again because this woman doesn’t give a crap about her kids safety over “convenience”

[@luancosta199]

Tbh i feel sorry for op in story 2, the way they were acting throughout like a parent scolding an irresponsible child u can kinda tell that they've been having to clean up their mom's mess for a while now

[@DragonbornMike-ym2er]

I know right? It's tough hearing about when kids have to parent their own parent(s). And it's kinda bittersweet when people ending raising their kids with better morals then their own.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Based on the comments, this is controversial I guess but for story 3 I'm going either justified AH or NTA. This was tough love, misguided maybe, but tough love all the same. Teaching kids they can't trust OP is ridiculous. The kids won't know anything about this unless the mom tells them and why would she? And we don't know that OP HASN'T said she'd watch the kids. That's a major reach to just decide OP hasn't tried to be part of the solution. The friend is without a doubt a huge AH. What if a predator is watching that house. It would take literally no effort for him/her to just walk in the house and do anything to those kids

[@veezopolis]

Yeah maybe all those commenter would like if the OP didn't come around till the Mom calls her bawling cuz the kids burned themselves to death 🤔

[@melodymagickal6508]

I don't recall details- I think it was here in Houston but maybe elsewhere- a woman ran a daycare and left the youngest ones alone with the 'older' children. I think they started a fire- and I'm not sure how many were injured or tragically killed. The people in these reddit comments calling her a full ahole is...concerning. She could call cps on the irresponsible mother. For Frick's sake anyone could walk in and say 'oh hey I know your mommy let's get in my car'. What a stupid woman to leave her kids alone and honestly she should be thankful they weren't truly kidnapped. Better the friend taking them than an actual predator and this should be a wakeup call to either take her kids with her or get someone to watch them.

[@Yume10605]

I think if the friend doesn't straighten up her act. Op needs to either tell dad(as long as he isn't abusive) or tell the friends family. Cause this might not get better but infact get worest. Especially once the friend starts dating. What's to say she won't leave the kids alone at night for her date cause it's easier then getting a babysitter or have the guy come to her home.

[@mogulmade]

Exactly. This is a clear NTA.

[@alexanderhenby1362]

I wouldnt be worried about a predator. The creepy old guy in a van isnt real, She does need to worry about Dad though. This does not sound like an amicable divorce and if he loses I could 100 percent see that ending on the 6 o'clock news. Kids arent kidnapped by strangers, they do get kidnapped by family.

[@MGP2210]

01:30 OP, you need to learn to say no as well. Should've taken your luggage and headed home on your own. Leave them to their vacation.

[@jennilynne1977]

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! I hope everyone is having a great day/afternoon/night! Peace ☮️, hugs 🤗 and love 😘!

[@paden1865able]

Oh, hiiii, there, you caught me right in the middle of tearing my kitchen apart and putting it back together! Lol ! Lovely to have some waffles, thank you!!

[@randomusername3873]

3rd story, does Op realize that if her friend is that irresponsible the best for the kids is to be with their father?

[@neilmacke4039]

Story 3: When my daughter was born had a nightmare that I’d lost her in Derbyshire (UK county). That horrifying distressing dream has stayed with me 22 years later😳 ps I was also driving a Jeep in the dream trying too find her. I couldn’t even drive in real life lol

[@amberleeannalee1999]

Also NEVER ever go off your meds before a huge vacation or big changes

[@GalliaUchiha]

For story 3 it was a real kidnapping. But also though love. Justified AH. That woman needs to get her shit together and it seems like having her kids removed from her negligence is the only thing that might get her to open her eyes to reality. If the OP wanted to actually 'fake kidnap' the kids, then they could have texted the mom after they got to the house saying they were there but the kids were gone. Or have been a proper responsible adult and called the cops and/or cps and had them removed from custody of the mom.

[@yamiarisu49]

For reference old school Hispanics will not respect boundaries. New school Hispanic mom, will say let me know when get there and back, be safe and have fun.

[@adchoalulle387]

That first comment on the kidnap story is glorious, I hope it hit hard were it needed to.

[@MrsShocoTaco]

I know a chick whose MiL insisted on her daughter (SiL age 19) accompanying her and her new hubby on their honeymoon to "make sure they won't get too loud". She divorced him 3 years later after he refused to go see her in the hospital after surgery because his mother didn't want to be alone.

[@momshardrockvideos]

Story 1: no, you are not wrong. This is going to be a BIG problem going forward. You need to let this mamas boy go. RUN!!!!

[@FriedaMMartin]

Good afternoon! About to drop off my son’s valentines presents for his teachers once my lunch hour is here

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Aw have a safe drive

[@Swnsasy]

As a mother with 3 grown children I don't want them in my house let alone on my trip!! 🤣🤣🤣I raised them, hubby and I have our home by ourselves FINALLY and our cat! IT'S PEACEFUL!!! Boyfriend needs to stop allowing boundaries to be crossed!! If he has no spine, you have ZERO TIME!!

[@ericaallisonc]

Sounds like you don't like your kids very much.

[@Josku2411]

Oop early and my valentines has been wild..my cars battery died in a thrift shop parking lot and i was kinda pissed about that then my grandpa drove over and jumpstarted my car and then my absolute W of a grandpa was like "Meet me at the gas station" and got me a full tank of gas for valentines and like considering i haven't had a full tank all winter pretty much man that feels good

[@RedCeltay]

So what was bad turned good. Just be sure to run the car long enough to give the battery a good charge, & have a great day.

[@Josku2411]

@@RedCeltay Oh dw we're gonna charge it now that i'm home but i took a lil loop around town too with it

[@OneUponADime]

Story 2- of course someone comes out saying the knowing mistress is the victim. A man could be mugged and shot by a woman and somehow the woman will be the victim.

[@peteranon8455]

I read that comment and was like.... WHA...?

[@Cel3ere5]

I acknowledge the power dynamic but even that was a leap. She relishes the attention.

[@akl2k7]

@@Cel3ere5 Yeah, it's just as likely that the mistress went after him herself.

[@janieriddle6068]

Last story- I was that kid back in the day. Do you know how scared i was being home alone with nobody else home as well? No the neighbors were not home, No the doors were not locked. Anyone could have walked in. I just sat in front of the TV with a BFK waiting for somebody to try something. I was 8 yrs old.. I'm 49 now and it still screws with me.

[@lovelywolv]

Last story: NTA it was the same with the wife that left her kids in the car at the gas station WITH THE KEYS IN IT! She needed a wake-up call. She doesn't need full custody

[@LaineyBug2020]

What do you do? GIRL, RUN!! Serpentine Motions! Evasive Maneuvers!

[@novabrilliant4510]

Just got home from a 12 mile ride. Going to have some tea with the waffle. Thanks Mark.

[@bioshockbrat9171]

Story 1: I love my MIL, I know she'd give us space, but I'd end up focusing my attention on her, to make sure she isn't lonely on the trip and it isn't romantic anymore, I'd let my MIL down gently and arrange time for a visit to tell her about our trip and listen to stories about hers

[@amberleeannalee1999]

Why gently ? She is an older adult who got to live a life before you. She was able to experience all of this without a crazy MIL. You deserve that much

[@X2XImTheNewCancerX2X]

Third story reminds me of when I was in school, a bit. A friend and I were going door to door for a fundraiser, and for one door we knocked, and a couple of kids who were MAYBE four and six opened the door and just ... walked away. No sign of any parents. No answer when I asked the kids if their parents were home. I leaned in and called 'Hello?' and got no response. So my friend and I just pulled the door closed and left, since we didn't know what else to do. It was the most weirdly unsettling thing. If I were the OP I would definitely be tempted to do something similar to make a point, though actually straight up kidnapping the kids was a bit much.

[@carolsh1983]

I’m sure the Mom didn’t want to call the police because she was afraid of being in trouble for leaving her kids. It was illegal and wrong to leave them alone. But she would likely have to take parenting classes and have CPS checks. That’s disruptive and stressful, but not insurmountable. The “friend” would likely get community service because it was a first offense and returned the kids before police were called, but if they got the wrong judge could end up with a felony record or serve time, especially if they didn’t start showing some real recognition of what she did wrong.

[@cheskydivision]

As a child of the 70’s being 8 and home alone for a bit was no big deal but with a 5yo it’s a bit tougher.. we also had rules. Go in after school. Lock the door. Keep curtains closed and not answer the door.

[@dcg590]

Story 1- op, I admire your hope but it WILL happen again. Time to get a new bf

[@calicocritterscrafts886]

Story 3: the state I live has a minimum age kids are allowed to be left at home and it’s 12 not 5 and 8. Mine are 6 and 4 and there is no way in heck I would leave them by themselves. My daughter is smart but at 6…no. That mother is being irresponsible and OP is making terrible choices in an attempt to “teach a lesson”. The lesson to learn is that kids are inconvenient to the mother and therefore should probably go live dad.

[@katrinasamuels-garrison825]

If those kids get kidnapped or hurt, I wonder if OP can partly be held responsible because he knew what was happening and didn't report it?

[@maryclaar4629]

My thought is that mom was paying for the trip, and mom and son did an act to " make it ok" that she came a!ong. Run, girl.

[@cb9825]

Story 3 is bizzare. Locking the door is not that hard🙄but kidnapping was not the way to teach this mom a safety lesson.

[@jonathanreid2237]

The third story hits close to home, as when I was 4 my parents would leave me home alone a lot, and one time they were gone for about 15 minutes to go get my brother from school, and I was in the backyard which was fenced and gated, and a young teenager jumped the fence and raped me, so I don't think any kids should be left alone for any amount of time since It doesn't take much time for something bad to happen

[@amyyaku5022]

S3: Something most redditors weren't thinking about: the kids could've went through worse than a kidnapping. What would they do if a burglar came in cause their parent lacked common sense and locked the door? What had a weapon, especially a gun? What if one of the kids started a fire? Would they know where the fire extinguishers are or be able to get out of the house safely? What OP did was kidnapping and could've handled things differently but the kids are a lot safer with them then their own mom imo. Id say they were the justified AH here. The friend really needed a reality check or something could've happened to her kids and she would've ended up in jail where she belongs (know I sound harsh on her but I hear too many stories of parents leaving their kids home alone like this and ting kidnapped hurt or killed).

[@DragonbornMike-ym2er]

Story 1: The backpack is pretty suspicious, but even putting that aside. This time it's a vacation trip. What will it be next time where MIL gets the priority, without even discussing it with OP? But since he was able to see the problem without much pushing, maybe there's a chance the behavior can be changed. But that's still a big red flag to lookout for.

[@christinamcqueen6182]

I'm going against the grain here, but I don't think OP was the AH in story 3. Sometimes people do not change with mere words/advice/warning and need a little scare/tough love to teach them a lesson. What if it WASN'T OP who took the kids one day? OP at least had good intentions and, from what we know, would never hurt the kids. I was left alone all the time as a kid, but my parents taught me to lock the door, never open the door for ANYONE, EVEN family friends, and to stay quiet in one place until they returned. With two very young kids who clearly weren't taught that, this was a tragedy waiting to happen

[@rirmgigs]

Ooooo this is gonna be a juicy one just by the title!

[@lbfaith]

First story: I would’ve just given him a second chance to prove himself. And just be observant to their relationship and see how he places his priories.

[@Zminator1986]

Story 1: Only a 7 month relationship? Ditch him and tell his mother that she can keep her boyfriend.

[@BeautifulBeastie]

That mom should learn her lesson and stop leaving her kids in a dangerous situation

[@srkh8966]

Story 2: if Steve knows that the daughter knows, he will stay away because there are strict rules in most businesses about dating subordinates. Steve knows he could lose his job if the company finds out.

[@bricksloth6920]

There is no bad situation that can't be made worse by suddenly going off your meds. I really don't recommend that.

[@jeanglendinning1860]

1st story, he is an adult mama cant stop him doing what he wants to, red flag i would run for the hills

[@poohbear4515]

Mark, you definitely were in my head about the past story about a man-baby inviting his mommy with him even tho OP paid for the trip. This mother sounds very entitled, overbearing, and will be in anything and everything their doing, and he won’t say, or do a damn thing cause what mommy says goes.

[@amberleeannalee1999]

When and if I see adults having histrionic tantrums I’d laugh so hard and record it. That will stop them and public shaming stops that crap cold

[@PinkMarshmallows]

Story 3: NTA, though that could be my bias coming out, since I have an ex SIL who is doing this type of shit with my nieces who are pretty much the exact same ages as those kids. Yes, I've already contacted CPS about her, as she leaves the girls longer than 10 mins and it's more like 5+ hrs. They are no help as they told her to do some parenting classes. 😡 My BIL even saw my nieces walk into a busy street because they were hungry and their mother wasn't home.

[@cb9825]

Story 1 OP wrote that she was crying for at least 2 hours while in the car and neither bf nor his mom said anything? How is it possible to sit next to the girl and not see all the tears? That's glimpse into her future with them. She'll cry and these people will pretend that they don't notice her obvious distress.

[@trishagray7122]

Story 3 has most people forgot that op has repeatedly told the mom to stop leaving the kids alone yes it was a crap move on the op's part but if it was reported the momwould lose the kids

[@mztweety1374]

Run. You will never get a Latino or Asian away from their mother. Run. I said what I said. Also...RUN.

[@LiveLocallyNow]

S3: wtf NTA. I bet she never left them alone again. Maybe a lost friendship but a sacrifice made to ensure no kids lost. That mom is beyond irresponsible.

[@ninaross211]

YOU ARE IN. CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE !!!! DEMAND !!! RESPECT !!!

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

Story 3: OP is NTA because she didn't kidnap the children, she babysat them. The mother is just the worst because she can't be bothered to even lock the door before she leaves. This means she's mentally unwell and most likely is going out for drugs not errands or shopping. This is due to shopping taking at least 30 mins. You have to drive to the shop, find a parking, walk in, search for your items, get in line to pay, then go back to your car and drive home. At least 30 minutes! So... She's going down to a street dealer to pick up her drugs. Addicts tend to space out important things like minding their children and locking the door and all the other things one should do before leaving the house. OP needs to let the ex know about this situation. Her friend is NOT a good parent and is putting those children in more danger than OP realizes.

[@theLadyScribe]

drugs? really she was running errands for goodness sake, probably not getting drugs, 30 minutes is a pretty average time to grab some groceries or handle bills

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

@@theLadyScribe No one runs errands and leaves their children unattended without having the doors locked. If you think it is OK leaving little ones alone with unlocked doors, then I HOPE you don't have children. Only those who actually lowkey want to lose their children or those with a brain totally distracted (ie and addict jonsing for their next fix) will be so neglectful.

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

@@theLadyScribe OP states that their friend says it is only for TEN MINUTES. No where I have lived does ANY errand take 10 minutes.

[@badkitty4922]

Happy Valentine's Day, EVERYONE! Remember, Self Love is important, as well! Much Love!😘😘💝💝

[@khaleesireyna731]

Leave it to enablers to give a YTA/ESH verdict for story 3. Oh boo hoo, she's having a rough time so that totally excuses her parental neglect! She's lucky it was just OP and they were down the street and honestly, she's always gonna play victim and never learn, so clearly the ex deserves to have custody

[@paulchaudoir190]

Yes the father needs to be the one who has the custody of the children. So they can keep the children away from the mother and OP.

[@eye-chan1711]

Story 3: I don’t think I can call OP the AH. I’m not really sure what a good ages is to leave kids alone for a while, but you seriously can’t even lock the door? Like what is wrong with you? When her kids actually get stolen I hope OP is there to tell her ‘I told you so.’

[@seshthecat]

Story 1 needs to give him a chance to follow through on his word. It won't take long for that to be proven.

[@bettreon]

Last story NTA. Your friend is negligent and leaving her small children alone is a massive problem. I hope the father gets custody because the mother cares more about "5 minutes away" versus doing the right thing with her kids.

[@icarussisyphus]

OP2 is such a brave and high integrity young woman. If I was her dad, I would be proud of her. People who cheat or cheat as the AP are narcissistic trash. How selfish can you be a part of ruining a family.

[@tartlynerdy]

Story 1 - This guy doesn't have a healthy concept of what compromise means. This wasn't a compromise. He totally caved like a pushover at the first sight of mom losing control or putting a show of emotion to guilt him. A compromise would have been a phone call or texting her to let her know he's safe instead of letting her tag along like a third wheel. Story 2 - Ideally, I'd make a plan to get distance from mom before blowing up her life. This could risk her job and her future employment and mom would totally make op's life miserable going forward or even physically take revenge on op. It's bold to assume the boss is manipulating the mom but I wouldn't rule it out. Op is smart not to trust his mom's word. Cheaters lie when they claim they stopped their affair. Story 3 - nawh. This is a justified assh*le move. She was playing a stupid game and knew the risks. I can't believe people are trying to demonize op for what they did. Dont enable shitty parenting just because "she's going through a rough time".

[@Nerdbookworm]

Someone link me when story one gets updated, I want to see how much of a doormat she’ll be

[@floraposteschild4184]

Same. If I had to bet, I think she'll stay with him. At least until OP and BF move in together, and mum wants her own room.

[@Cel3ere5]

Lol I'll take that bet too. "He seemed sincere." Girl, bye. 😂

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

You know she didn't leave him lol let's just hope she doesn't let herself get pregnant

[@TwiggyHetfield27]

Story 1: "He said she cried and was freaking out about him going on vacation and wasn't going to let him go at all, and that letting her come was "their compromise"" Uhhhhhh... SHE wasn't going to let HIM go at all... OP said he was 20 right? An adult? Fully capable of making his own decisions. Yeaaa, she's a controlling mom who'll be in her sons business FOREVER unless he cuts her off. And judging by their "compromise" he's never going to cut ties with mommy.

[@sparklemotion8377]

Story 1: OP didn't mention the packed bag in the update

[@leighnisbett9691]

S1, Op try having Chamomile tea along side your anti depressants ,Chamomile tea has anti depression and anxiety medication as a natural ingredient bases ,I also have anxiety with depression and getting treatment for a complete mental breakdown and it's my main medication ,2 mugs of chamomile tea a day helps balance your body and brain chemicals along with meditation. You need to set boundaries for the future with your future in-laws .NTA