My Sister Made A 'Joke' About My Son's Mum Abandoning Him r/Relationships

[@DgShadowChocolate]

I’ve heard the bridezilla story before, and I still can’t get over the bride literally trying to murder her then 5 yr old sister, and the family never acknowledged how messed up that was.

[@partysuvius]

My twin tried to kill me with a chair when we were kids and we both joke about it now, cause I pissed him off when he was playing a game. He was addicted to it, and lashed out at me. He feels bad about it, felt bad after it happened. BiPD is hereditary and it’s very prevalent in our family, so it’s possible he has it. Our eldest sister was diagnosed. I didn’t even know til my grandparents told me

[@SherlocksLeftNipple]

Small correction: the SISTER was 5 years old, when she tried to murder OP, who was barely even 1 year old, at that point, which... really doesn't make it any better. Parents really need to start acknowledging that young children can suffer from severe mental health problems, same as adults, instead of pretending children are innocent little lambs, who can't possibly need therapy or want to harm others as a coping mechanism to deal with emotions, that're easier to externalize than acknowledge as being wrong.

[@francinetitherington4060]

The sister needed help, even at age 5.

[@KyrieChii]

The story (somewhere in the 1 hour range?) with the Dad complaining about the Mom not waking up soon enough, leaving their toddler alone, awake, in a crib, for hours every day: During the post: "I think she's lazy & unmotivated, I got upset because she's leaving our toddler son alone in his room/crib to wait for her to wake up, usually for HOURS, I feel he's being neglected so I called her on it, AITA?." During the update: "My wife is an amazing wonderful wife & mother, I do not think she's lazy or neglectful in ANY WAY (don't know where you people are getting this stuff.... I mean sure, I _said it,_ but). Oh yeah, she has _PPD & documented (very common) sleep issues,_ but I thought that would change how people responded while I was mad at her, so I didn't mention it. It's AMAZING how ridiculous & judgmental you people are about a person you don't know, based entirely on my exaggerated pissed off disingenuous complaints, in fact my wife & I are sitting here laughing that people actually believed what I was saying & cared about the welfare of our young family. I mean, it's not like I _care_ what the internet thinks of my wife,, don't know why you're all getting that impression just because I asked." WTF. He just wrote all that for validation while he was mad at his wife & wasted everyone's time, THEN came back _with his wife_ (according to him, who actually fucking knows) to scold & mock those who were concerned & gave actual advice.

[@kp2223]

Yes to all of this

[@WhitneyDahlin]

Yeah the wifes behavior is unacceptable and his edits are completely unacceptable. There is something seriously wrong and his wife is clearly not getting better even with all the treatment or she wouldn't ignore her kid for hours to sleep. I think he doesn't want to admit just how sick she really is and neither does she. That's why he got angry and walked back everything he said. He doesn't actually want to do anything about it.

[@drrobinf.a.2942]

I agree. I would add that it sounds as though she might have a sleep phase disorder, and husband is confusing cause and effect. She's not staying up in order to play games, she's playing games because she's not tired.

[@shahana_style]

They deserve each other.

[@rubymeaddle]

​@@WhitneyDahlinthe wife is sick and is getting help He on the other hand omitted her medical problems

[@maddymad4989]

Can I just say - for the second story about the two sisters- I just wanna say as someone who has a 5 year age gap with my lovely younger brother, you can still have that sibling bond with them. I have a very close relationship with him. Just felt like I should say that!

[@N3yo100]

People play up the age gap alot

[@stephjovis3469]

That`s a lucky and a matter of personality. My siblings are 3.5 (my brother) and 5.5. years (my sister) older than me. We were never as close. my brother and I did ok my sister isn`t close to either of us, they hate each other we kinda tolerate each other. I always wished for an older sister despite having one. So I guess if you`re not close you tend to blame the age gap because we dont´know better.

[@eclipse849]

I mean damn at least Jacks mom realized that she wasn't fit to be a mom and got help instead of leaving all together

[@lianabaddley8217]

Or just staying. Who knows what could've happened. There have been news stories of REALLY bad things happening.

[@eclipse849]

@@lianabaddley8217 What do you mean by that

[@lianabaddley8217]

@@eclipse849 a couple (? Few?) years ago. There was a news story about a woman who had walked in traffic on I-15 at night. After, it came out she had recently had a baby and had been having mental problems. The woman her husband and all their family had been trying to get her help. Nobody believed her. Drs just told her to get more sleep. After there were more news stories about anxiety, depression, mental health and especially postpartum depression and how if you knew/were someone to get help. Sad that a woman has to walk in front of a diesel truck to get more people talking about it here.

[@eclipse849]

@@lianabaddley8217 OMG I’ve never heard of this before normally in situations where the mother resents the baby and physically or mentally hurts the child and the child ends up dead, with a different guardian, or in the system

[@lianabaddley8217]

@@eclipse849 I've never had PPD but I don't think it's resentment. Their brain is just not working right. There have been stories of mother's seemingly completely going off the deep end. Taking all their kids driving into the ocean. Off a cliff. Drowning them in the tub. All had a severe case of PPD. They all sound like a nightmare.

[@Nursern1974]

The mom is amazing for recognizing the needs of her child over her own. The stigma and ignorance attached to mental illness is why so many are reluctant to seek therapy. Prayers that you continue to grow as a family. Your sister needs to be ashamed

[@stephjovis3469]

Gotta love how a dad being available via video chat during the pandemic, or because of mental health issues, is a hero for caring for his kid. A mum leaving the kid with his dad while she gets the help she needs abandons him.

[@angelaa7388]

So the sister thinks it would have been better for the baby to have a mom who is present, yet mentally ill? It's attitudes like that which lead mothers not to seek care for themselves postpartum.

[@catherinecox573]

Untreated, she could have hurt herself or the son, sister is an ignorant ahole

[@ajzephyros7454]

I think sister is one of those people who thinks mental illness is all bs. They are depressingly common

[@lianabaddley8217]

There was a news story here in Utah a couple(?few?) years ago. A new Mom had gone in for help. Which she didn't get. Hubby knew something was wrong. Nobody would help her. Eventually she was able to sneak out. She walked into traffic at night on the interstate I15. The Diesel driver said he will never get over it. After it came out that they had been trying to get help for a while after child birth. There were more and more stories about depression, mental health and especially postpartum depression.

[@jessicacharlton7347]

Most people don't understand how bad Postpartum Depression can get. It can get so bad that the person experiencing it may temporarily be unable to take care of themselves or their kids properly. It can even cause psychosis sometimes. I'm glad the woman in the story was able to get help and be a part of her kids life again.

[@shawnmccarty6923]

No actually the sister thinks OP should have went out and found his child a good mom and simply cut biomommy out until she got herself well then she could have maybe gotten supervises visitations and slowly worked towards regular visitations every other weekend or something

[@mj-kawai]

I would never trust the abusive father of the newborn child again. What if there is a crisis? If she gets pregnant again, what if she gets ill?... I would believe there's a monster underneath the surface when shown one.

[@littlegreycat]

The postpartum Mom and Dad needs an intervention. They need counseling and a separation for a while.

[@Qabim]

Sorry, but after a MONTH of abuse, im out the door. I'm not as forgiving as op, ig, but idc. I'd leave him so hard. You don't CHOOSE TO ABUSE YOUR PISTPARTUM WIFE and get away with it. In my eyes, I wouldve started the revenge plan. But hey. I'm just an internet troll lol

[@katwiltz1134]

For the one with the crazy control freak sister hang in there sometimes when you think they can't think about anything else but themselves they have a kid and it kind of balances out what's wrong with them so here's her hopes and prayers much love to your mom

[@rinpaisys]

How long can you claim being angry on the behalf of someone who was never angry before admitting it’s not on their behalf?

[@rubymeaddle]

Boyfriend hates crying baby: welcome to apartment life 🤣 I heard my neighbors doing the nasty, it's just part of living next to people. Him not wanting to stay at his house gives me red flags, I wonder if he's cheating on his girlfriend and OP is his side piece.

[@asherikamichaela8425]

Ngl, I got those vibes too. Hell, he might even have kids of his own and this baby's crying reminds him. OP might’ve been his his AP without even knowing. 🤔 Good riddance either way. He sounds unhinged and she doesn't need that toxicity in her life.

[@francinetitherington4060]

He's married.

[@TheFlowerchild712]

Wait, she wants the guests to pay $150 each AND give gifts?! WTAF?! This is beyond insane and ridiculously entitled! Edit: Holy crap! Bridezilla actual tried to kill OP and mom thinks it's a "funny story"?! No, lady your Bridezilla daughter needed to reigned in ages ago!

[@LittleImpaler]

15!? By that age you should know stealing is bad. The 15 year old needs to be in jail to learn a lesson that is mom didn't teach him when he was young.

[@elisabethb.131]

I'm queer, and I don't blame the OP that was deceived into beardhood for outing her ex. Clearly, under normal circumstances, outing someone is fundamentally wrong. But what OP's ex did to her is 'wronger'. Not only did he deceive her and destroy het life as she thought it was. He also set her up for being his family's punching bag, and expected her to just sacrifice her reputation and emotional wellbeing for his. That's not how it works. If you break the social contract of common decency, ethics, and responsibility that badly? You automatically release other people from their end of that 'contract' as well. Whatever you are, playing nasty games will win you nasty prizes.

[@LizLuvsCupcakes]

Oh boy! Another binge compilation! These are my freakin favourite!!

[@LittleImpaler]

The mom doesn't see her son stealing is bad? Her head isn't on right.

[@rubymeaddle]

That op is a man

[@gcarr1089]

Story 1 - wonder if sister is worried Annie will take her son away from OP if she can prove she is a unfit mum. OP and Annie aren't married and courts tend to give the child to the mum.

[@ajzephyros7454]

Given OP was already given custody of the kid before due to the courts deeming the mother unfit for custody, I think that would weigh in his favor. I think sister is just one of those people who thinks all mental health issues are bs

[@gcarr1089]

@@ajzephyros7454 but if she can prove she is able to look after the kid, a judge can change it.

[@charmedleblanc]

I could see the fear. Courts are crazy biased to Moms. But I can't see him losing custody beyond a 50/50 split because he's done everything right. Frankly I don't see her taking her son away from his father at all, but you are only getting a glimpse of the situation.

[@FineFlicks342]

Legitimate concern. I hadn't even considered this as an option.

[@TiffWaffles]

Not in this case they wouldn't. Annie has a history of mental health and the courts would take this into consideration and probably give sole custody to OP. I say this as somebody who has family and friends who have mental health, and the court favours the former partner/parent who doesn't have those issues.

[@Anschlagen]

The religion post was a reverse athiest from a religious family. She pushed anti religion so hard it just made the kids want to do it more... If she was truly open about the kids choosing, she'd be ok with them getting baptised and going to Sunday school if they want to go. She's a fanatic herself.

[@ianesgrecia8568]

She is a hypocrite and she knows it

[@standinthegsp6858]

No, the ex ruined his own life. He’s manipulative, a liar & an adulterer, among other things. He also, potentially, put your life in danger. He could have told them that HE was unhappy, no longer loved Op etc... but he deliberately through OP under the bus.

[@eldeano9964]

Story 1: sister is stubborn, that's a good enough reason to cut her out of your life. Its a pathetic trait, and adults that double down are exhausting and life's too short for negative/toxic people around you.

[@Jrskeetpro]

She’s also protective of her brother and family, there’s nothing wrong with that

[@asherikamichaela8425]

Tbf, stubbornness is fine, so long as it's directed in healthy, positive ways. Being malicious and controlling/intrusive like she is? No good.

[@lorifiedler13]

How does OP know his son sleeps all night long? Does he work nights or day shift? What else does he do besides the bedtime? When he gets home, does he go to sleep right after eating? Does he do anything in the house besides the bedtime?

[@ianesgrecia8568]

I just really hope that OP on the first story never have to deal with wife's another fall. Then he will be alone and sister will be proven not only right, but probably call CPS on him

[@tatymaz660]

the first story would use the example of women getting depressed after giving birth. imagine the sister telling women they are horrible because they aren't mentally able to take care of their child. like Annie sounds like a horrible person.Honestly wouldn't want her around my kid. he's a good father and person

[@standinthegsp6858]

I’d be concerned that this wasn’t the first time that your son committed theft. You should give him the $2k & make your son work it off to pay you back. You do not want a college/university or future employer to find out about this, especially if this was a one of incident. You don’t want to roll the dice that his juvenile criminal record will be sealed. Since he deliberately did this with intent is very concerning. He needs to be drug tested.

[@candaceowens455]

Babies, toddlers wake up and go back to sleep. If you get them out of the crib every time they wake they won’t be content to to sleep in the crib. Mine got up at 5:30 am everyday. I got up. No matter how hard I tried to shift the schedule….no. But they would wake and play for a few min then make a “hey” I’m up and want up now.

[@FineFlicks342]

STORY #1: Would love to learn more about how OP s relating to Annie. At whatever level, they once had feelings for each other and now they are coparenting their son. Is there a chance that their feelings for each other might mature and become stronger? Will they ever be more than just Jack's parents?

[@standinthegsp6858]

Break up with him. He pretty much threatened the baby. He did threaten you. Tell him that, because the baby is bothering him that it might be best that he doesn’t come over anymore. Also tell him that if anything happens to the baby you’ll be very upset & be happy to help the police investigate. I think he’s mooching off you.

[@staylor3483]

Neighbor baby vs toddler boyfriend: how much you want to bet, boyfriend lives at home with mommy & daddy & that's why he doesn't want to go home at night or let his girlfriend stay over at 'his' place? 😂😂😂

[@rubymeaddle]

Nah he probably lives with his wife

[@mikehilbert9349]

It is so true, the ring goes on the finger, the bridezilla manifests.

[@DaniS398]

Anyone defending the ex who lied to his wife and cheated on her because he was closeted is also an AH.

[@ohboy-zi1yf]

"hE cOuLd fAcE vIoLeNcE fOr bEinG gAy" ok but women are assaulted and murdered every day by inlaws for trying to leave their shitty husbands, the exhusband was putting *op* in danger

[@bridgetdebourgh5698]

Hey Markee 👋 your probably starting your day while I'm finishing mine (8pm) Have a good night/day everyone 🤗

[@hilaryc3203]

Well that's a wedding I would miss

[@kristinwiebold2433]

OP NTA. Your sister should have gotten therapy long time ago. I am shocked that your sister tried to smother you when she was 5 and it seemed like she wasn't held accountable for that or giving the help she needed. It wasn't your or your mother's fault. But it was your mom's fault for always giving into your sister's bad behavior instead of disciplining her. Your sister was a crazy bridezilla and I am so glad your aunt and dad were on your side. Glad your dad is making sure you still get your money and that loan can be cancelled. Glad he was on your side for not going to the wedding. I wouldn't pay 150 for a seat at a wedding

[@kristinwiebold2433]

So happy for Op's last update. Hope the brother's wedding goes well. Glad OP has a nice bf and I hope their relationship goes well. Congratulations 🎉 OP

[@jaymel4691]

Closeted cheating ex story- I'm wondering about the ex BF's boyfriend. I would not want a relationship with someone who is not only closeted but also willing to marry someone as their beard, just to use them to have their own kids and keep their homophobic family off their back. I can't understand how that BF can even stand to stay with him. The Ex is treating him like garbage just as much as he did to OP. Update: oh, that explains it. The other BF had his own beard who also had no idea her husband was also closeted. Those two (and BF's family) are awful people and it has nothing to do with them being gay.

[@stephjovi]

Well bf was doing the same thing (reminder : Mormon dude married to hide that he had a bf wife caught them. Bf also had a wife and kids)

[@YourShadowKeeper]

The religious story: My parents were raised following two different branches of Christianity (one being Catholic), they attended church all their child/teen years. The Catholic still has their faith, while the other was agnostic from the time they became a teen they were just forced to continue attending the families church. Both my parents decided to baptise us (thanks to the Catholic fear of lost souls and family tradition), but they raised us to be free to have faith in whatever we wished to (or not if we didn't wish to). We attended prayer of many different religions and branches of religions and were encouraged to research any religion and ask questions. As teens two of us were drawn to Buddhism and similar religions, but as adults the three of us aren't particularly religious nor do we identify as a follower of any religion in particular. Because of this I don't have an issue with the OP wanting to raise her kids open to religion but not feel forced, as that's how we were raised also. However, I will say if there's anything she's nervous about she and her husband should have very clear open communication about any fears/issues and BOTH need to be willing to compromise. My Catholic parent was happy to share all they know about their religion, the good, bad, and ugly. But they also told us about other religions as philosophy and theology were things they had studied. Religion just like other social groups can create a sense of community and belonging, it can also give some people a path to follow. It's not all bad, you just have to allow for the chance that your kid may grow beyond said religion and the parents should be very clear with the kids that if that does happen, then neither parent will be upset or hurt by the kid's choices, and they will continue to love and respect the kids as they always have.

[@PinkMarshmallows]

Love the long videos. Keep it up.

[@TisOnlyAScratch]

53:12 - OP Needs to confirm the value of the toy. If it's less than brother claims, find a middle ground between the lesser number and the $2k and pay that or go to court. If more, pay the middle ground between the $2k and higher number (at least....OP should pay the higher number). Next: The son needs to be disciplined. He needs to either do chores around the family home or find a job. No electronics, no TV, no unproductive/unhealthy/just for fun hobbies, etc (never ban reading but limit it to education and classics, classical Music and radio, etc. No friends over for a limited time). Son must pay OP back every cent over time. OP is the jerk if at a minimum he doesn't pay brother $2k or offer the actual lesser researched value.

[@TisOnlyAScratch]

53:33 - (Whiney Voice) "BUT We're FAMILY......." Can you say, "Entitled Parent"? Say it with me....."En- tite-led Pair-ent".......GOOD JOB!

[@rubymeaddle]

The brother had a written appraisal

[@joannejohnston1306]

you do know ADHA meds will act like speed to someone who is not ADHD that is why she cant get to sleep at night she is still zooming

[@vetaroberts3333]

She didn’t know they were taking them to church

[@heatherdickau5335]

The first story. The sister is so wrong. The woman is a very good mother. She recognized she had problems and made sure the child was safe and in a loving place. So she could get help.

[@stephjovi]

I'm so glad my apartment building has thick walls and there's no baby's around. Here almost nothing.

[@Nursern1974]

These bridezillas are ridiculous! Guests and bridal party need to ghost this nightmare wedding. Her fiancé should see this as red flags. Unless wealthy your family is crazy. OP best of luck in escaping this madness. Glad you have your aunt’s support

[@vetaroberts3333]

I would opt out of this wedding, and tell her to deal with it

[@JayeEllis]

A 19 year old cannot transfer that much into a TFSA in Canada. There is a yearly contribution limit that starts at age 18. $12-13K maximum total room there.

[@shahana_style]

Bridezilla needs to have everyone RSVP a hard NOPE for that wedding. She's nutty. And MEN: STOP LETTING YOUR WIVES ACT LIKE IT'S NOT YOUR WEDDING, TOO!!!

[@zenatimadiha7030]

Story 1 Yes you're doing the right thing about your baby's mother But just an advise you have to protect your son I hope his mother get well soon but when it happens she could think she want her baby without his father and cause you problem I think that you don't know her that well after all you know the depressed version I wish you good and uour little family

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

1:32:28 baby knew they got OP out of a bad situation. High five deserved.

[@amyyaku5022]

Baby Story: YTA definitely, especially for not listing his wife's conditions. As long as your toddler is okay, let your spouse sleep ffs. And YES she is unmotivated! Anyone would be due to her conditions and a husband micromanaging her!🤦🏽‍♂️

[@rubymeaddle]

She's unmotivated due to diagnosed PPD

[@jamesrkrau2481]

He has been so nice for 17 months. He had been Mr perfect since then. Why would she want to leave now.

[@lorifiedler13]

$150 per guest just to attend. Run for the hill, might have to study or work on an important paper/project at university. Or take an important trip with friends.

[@helookalikaman79]

10:50 This would be the time to leave... Do NOT participate in anything with the wedding, it will have too much drama, not worth the risk

[@kristinwiebold2433]

OP NTA. He lied and betrayed you and used you for years. Perfect reasons to get divorced. What makes me mad is that he lied to his family and tried to blame it all on you. Also his mom is so nosey and giving advice that wasn't wanted. It is not women's fault if their husbands can't keep it in their 👖. So OP telling the truth isn't op's fault. He shouldn't have blamed OP for this.

[@ytl9558]

$100,000 wedding budget is wayyyyy too much. That's enough for a partial payment of some nice houses.

[@stephjovi]

Damn the collactable thing. I didn't pay that much attention, figured it was some 3 year old who saw a toy and wanted to play with it. 15? Get him to confess why he stole it and make him pay

[@TiffWaffles]

Truthfully, I wouldn't be very happy with Annie coming back into my brother's life if I was his sister, and I feel that I wouldn't trust her at first... but then I'd realise that Annie was mentally ill and needed to step away so that she could get into a better head space to be with her child. If Annie is proving that she's going to be a good mum and is building up a healthy relationship with Jack, I'd be supportive of that as both a sibling to OP and as an aunt. It would probably be slow going, but I'd hope to be the best SIL or a person of support to Annie herself.

[@bittersine2356]

46:20 AYO!

[@LittleImpaler]

Some are not marrying kind and can't be with one partner. It's good OP divorce his wife and moved on.

[@jessicathompson236]

First story; NTA. It's nothing to joke about.

[@bessevaraven859]

Even with the phone it IS INSOMNIA

[@tylergropp2394]

Second story y’all gonna need to take out a damn loan! Lol she did take out a loan. 🤯

[@helookalikaman79]

mama is a coward and folded.... Failure to protect her children....... There is a HUGE difference in forcing someone to NOT believe (or to believe) compared to NOT being EXPOSED to any religion until they can FULLY understand what they are learning etc.

[@francinetitherington4060]

Baptism. While I agree that no one should go behind a parent's back, I fully believe that kids by age 12 CAN have a sincere faith and desire baptism. Not as sure about 10, but it depends on the child.

[@vincentlucario5450]

Ok, but I’m confused. Did op think the grandparents would quit their jobs to watch the kids? Especially since they’re ove there almost every weekend

[@ThomasIsaac-z3q]

i know this won't be checked but the boxing thing story and checking out is global. a former friend of mine accidentally killed someone (he is not a former friend for that reason we drifted apart he never put gloves on again after 8 years in prison from 1 defensive punch). learning to fight young is important to defend yourself but learning control is more important. life can fuck you up and the wrong moments do happen and knowing when to pull a punch is important as to know when to throw one is equally important. If I could from what I know I would defend his actions. Obviously there's a lot missing on the circumstances.

[@catsncrows]

Second to last story hmmm...she was in a vulnerable state then she felt better. His malign behavior was during the vulnerable time and he snapped back to when she was back on her feet

[@asherikamichaela8425]

Idk... PPD for new fathers is a thing, too. They don't have the same wacky chemical changes going on from physically giving birth, but they can absolutely go through stress, sleep deprivation, anxiety and all the rest, same as the new mom. It's good that they're both getting help. I also wonder how much of hubby's actions were actually a real thing. 😕 Not victim-blaming or trying to downplay what he did, but having two sisters who've gone through PPD and other pregnancy/birth/new parent related complications... I know from first-hand experience that accounts from such times may not be completely in line with reality. That shit can _seriously_ mess with your head and make you believe things that just aren't true.

[@theresaschuebel5151]

I have a sister 6 years older than me and we were very cl9se until this January when she let her husband make a stupid decision so that the 3 of us got evicted. I had been staying with them for a while after my separation and had been paying bills inexchange for staying with them in a spare room. Now I have been staying in Airbnbs since February 3rd. I had to take a personal loan out to do this because I don't make enough to get into an apartment. I actually had to move to her town just to have a place to stay after my separation

[@Ashakat42]

For the amount of an AB&B you could have an appointment.

[@DivusMagus]

Story 1: The sister is very immature, Mental Health isn't less than physical health, It's even more important. A mother getting treatment with cancer is unlikely to cause harm to the child, but a mentally unstable mother absolutely could, she was doing the responsible thing to remove herself from the situation, I am glad OP understood her needs and didn't hold it against her like his sister. I do wonder if they are having a relationship or are planning on Co-parent platonically.

[@lishagallegos9551]

Last story husband is gonna pulla a Chris Watts!!

[@carolscott9330]

gay, and not telling family. the second one I feel for is the boyfriend. How could he stand for all this. bet once they had a kid he would dump her. having a part time child for himself and his family.

[@aurorarowley7310]

Didn't you pay attention to the rest of it? The boyfriend did the exact same thing. He even managed to get two kids from the woman before everything came out. The two men PLANNED to do this TOGETHER. Which makes it even worse.

[@staylor3483]

22 mo old left in crib after waking: Nobody seems to be even considering that at 22 mos, this child is most likely not potty trained yet & is in danger of developing a nasty rash or even a UTI from being left for an hour or two in his crib after waking up. ETA..Dad for micromanaging & mom for not getting an earlier start so the child is cared for better. There has to be a reason that mom is not waking up until 9 or 10 am. Find that reason! Both parents need to do better!

[@staylor3483]

After listening to the update: I am glad mom is getting treated for her issues. However, OP may want to talk to wife & her Dr's about possible Adult ADHD. This may also be a factor in the sleep pattern.

[@rubymeaddle]

If he had a wet diaper, he'd communicate that to his mom via crying

[@LittleImpaler]

Karma bit bridezellia sister in the ass.

[@x.s5162]

You gave your child EVERYWEEKEND to PASTORS and expected them to not take your child to church?? You know when their church is. If you don't want you kid at the church you dont have them babysit during church. I am a single parent living on aid and i dont want my child going to a church. My sister use to live as roommate with me and goes to church on 3 different days a week. So you know what i did? I never asked them to babysit during church hours.(Unless emergency emergency and they wasn't going to church anyways due to it, ie i got in a car accident once) Is the baptism part to far yeah kindof but kids are being taught what to believe at this stage and it seems you went the "dont say religion exists" path which leads to "omg magic god guy" when someone tells them. I teach my kid about all the different religions and which ones believe part of the same but think certain things happened differently (islam, Christianity, Judaism. And then all the subcategories of each of them who believe even more different things) etc. so kid already knows the stories and the claims and can choose what they believe. What happened is they don't believe any because of how many different ones there are and tell people who ask (very rare) "i do science" usually referring to the question "Who do you think made the world without God?" But main issue is you chose to put your kid there on church days when the work at the church so its your fault.

[@vetaroberts3333]

It’s called mind control

[@candaceowens455]

Oh come on…. I feel the same way …but ….. you knew they were pastors ….. you knew but never asked….

[@vincentlucario5450]

Yeah, op doesn’t sound like an active parent.

[@dianesmith2555]

No,don't go,you do not have the money.

[@helookalikaman79]

1:38:40 This is why Religion should NEVER be forced onto innocent children.... OP should keep the kids away from the in laws....

[@GoGalaxy]

It wasn't forced though... It was literally their choice? Also, if the mother didn't want the kids to go to church, she shouldn't have taken them to the grandparents every weekend.

[@rubymeaddle]

​@@GoGalaxy they were coached to lie to their mom

[@hannahevertson8306]

I would assume the kids really did enjoy the Sunday school in the religion story. I was raised religious and the only part of church I ever enjoyed was Sunday School. They make it fun a lot of the time, games and stories that reinforce their messages. I do think it's a big commitment for kids to be baptized. It's called a contract with god in many Cristian groups. However, i have some definite religious trauma so I tend to see the most dangerous parts.

[@thelifeandbreathofsamantha9878]

OK, baby being left in the bed. I do feel an hour is too long even for a toddler to be laying in their bed if they’re up and jumping around and I think mom should probably get some assistance at this stage maybe if she had a nanny in the morning if she’s struggling with postpartum, I think an even compromise would be 30 minutes, but one to two hours is too long for, a kid to be in there just because they are at the mischievous age. I would say if they want to make a compromise and dad has the time at work he could talk to his son through the speaker for an hour if that’s what they want to do and that actually could be why the baby feels calm that he’s being left out long is because he knows his daddy is going to speak to him through the speakers. I don’t believe he should be micromanaging his wife that way, but I think they should come to some sort of compromise and get her a little extra help.

[@sachicocoa9013]

38:17 AITA for outing my Ex as gay to get his mother off my back?

[@standinthegsp6858]

Your children are old enough to make the decision to accept The Lord & be baptized. Your husband was wrong to marry you, his parents were wrong to insist “... do not be unequally yoked to an unbeliever...”

[@rubymeaddle]

My church growing up didn't baptize kids 🤷‍♀️

[@kristinwiebold2433]

OP YTA and even bigger one for not understanding that what his son did was wrong and that he needed to go through the consequences. OP says I am going to " stand for my son". OP your son is 15. He should have known when he was little that stealing was wrong. Also OP sounds judgemental? Just because your brother is doing something different from you doesn't mean he is less than. I have to say it was even more disturbing to find out that op's son stole on purpose. I think the jail time sounds like correct punishment but I still think he should get a job and work his bum off to pay back his uncle. When op said something about police shouldn't be involved cuz family...... That is a bunch of baloney. If someone commits a crime, they need to pay the consequences or else they will never learn. OP and wife need to look at how they parent and see where they went wrong. And change things cuz he should have known stealing was wrong when he was a little kid.. I really don't think there is any excuse.

[@vetaroberts3333]

Nta, she isn’t taking care of her child

[@vetaroberts3333]

She isn’t a good mother

[@vetaroberts3333]

Have you been to his apartment, Nta

[@browniewin4121]

1) Absolutely NTA, sister is. She is not angry "on your behalf", it seems she wants the mother roll in her nephew's life and is trying to guard that turf and is jealous that his real mother is now displacing her. Her attitude and behaviour is disgusting and unacceptable and good for OP for kicking her out and telling her she is not welcome back unless and until she can behave appropriately and treat OP, and the mother of the child with respect. After update: Sorry OP's sister couldn't be a decent human and needed to be cut out of the lives of her brother, nephew and his mom. It's great the mom is doing better now and developing a positive relationship with her son. Lucky kid to have parents who love him and will protect him form toxic elements. 2) Sis has lost her damn mind ... this is beyond Bridezilla category. I hope everyone dips out from this ridiculous, over the top, overly controlling, entitled money-suck of a wedding and lead up to it. NTA. I hope she, groom and the parents are the only one's attending any of this, or, if groom sees the light, he and his family will back out. After comments: I'm glad OP is getting good advice on how to defend and protect herself from her insane immediate family. It's great OP has a loving, supportive aunt. After update: It is absolutely unconscionable that mom felt she could rob the other kids funds to give to sister's grandiose wedding plans. Wow, what a messed up family. Glad OP finally got to talk with her parents and that dad took the right actions. I'm glad OP needn't go to the wedding, and will get her savings fund now from dad. It's good sister was read the riot act and both parents and told to knock off her abusive behavior and get therapy for her issues. It's great that OP will get a good start at University and not have a loan. Sometimes the trash takes itself out and sis uninviting OP and going NC is a great example of that. I'm glad the rest of the family is doing better now and getting the therapy they need to help. After 3 month update: So happy to hear the family is doing well, OP is living a good life, and is gaining a nice SIL and has found a boyfriend. After final update: OMG, MIL invited groom's X ... WTH?! I feel sorry for any kid born into that family. OP saying, "not dramatic", obviously is used to living with and accepting such deep shit she can't even smell it when it is knee deep around her. 3) NTA, do not let someone else's insecurity stop the friendship, so long as he puts his bride first over others, all is well, besides, this was 2nd hand info so may not even be correct, either way, OP should talk to her friend about what was said. After update: Glad this was dealt with in a mature way to set the record straight to make for better understanding and good relationships going forward.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

Baby Is due next month.

[@nescawolf4187]

So i doubt the op will see this but for anyone else scared to start medication to treat depression: i have c-ptsd and Depression and getting on medication was the best decision i ever made. There is so much fear needing medication forever due to a mental condition but wouldnt think twice for a heart condition. Your ill in your mind and maybe like a flu you only need medication for a month or two, or maybe its like a disease and you need it forever, your doctor will work with you to determine which, but please know there is no shame on needing medicine for a mental ILLNESS.

[@queenwilco3723]

Atheist mom is clearly 1. Uninvolved with her children 2. Claims to want her kids to make their own decisions yet is pushing her beliefs on them and gets upset when they are exposed to other beliefs. 3. Takes her childrens wants and interests about something she doesn't agree with as some form of an attack on her personally and 4. Expected her in laws who are a REQUIRED PART OF THE CHURCH to not show up anymore because they had their children and should give up everything to fit into her world view while helping op and hubby out. So at some point hey hubby came to realize he wanted to be a part of the Christian community again but his wife created such a hostile environment around the subject he couldn't share that with her. Their kids asked to go and be a part of what the grandparents were doing, they found interest in the church and all of them were too scared to bring it up to her or they tried and were shut down. Clearly she's the one pushing something, she's the one refusing them a real choice and she's the toxic one people feel unsafe being themselves around

[@chickenkorma3163]

I" want them to make an informed choice based only on information I approved and selected." For not being a believer, it is also strange how much importance she attaches to baptism. They can change their mind later and the baptism would become meaningless.

[@lindahoward7309]

Even little children feel and love the spirit of knowing Jesus loves all children. They want to naturally love him back and learn about him. I believe that athiest are very selfish people. They refuse to believe in God as they think that will alter their life in ways they won't welcome. The best people in the world are true, God loving Christians that spread love and caring and direction to others. Athiest have no foundation or rock to stand on or a Father in heaven to guide and help them thru life. That mom wants her children to decide for themselves, but you can't decide without knowledge. You have to show them both sides. Then let them decide, but at an age of accountability.

[@rubymeaddle]

She's literally a working parent dude

[@kirksnowden8023]

What uni only cost 42k for 4 years? You’re still going to need that loan. But damn your privileged family is screwed up. Sorry for your predicament.

[@tmcyb]

2:08

[@lalayastill610]

that's not a joke

[@denises3630]

47:15 OP might have to move out of town. As someone who knows how people in the mormon church act with drama, its gonna linger for sure. This is also not gonna be the first or last time when a mormon man covered his sexuality for the sake of looking good at church.

[@tmcyb]

1:45:

[@sharonannrowland5783]

Stop the hate against Christians, it’s unfair and unwarranted- this woman is an outsider in her own family but it has more to do with her inner hate

[@kennethsjvold9212]

Story about the crazy family, did hole of reddit miss that the Father and mother helped everyone in the childhood with feeling safe and secure, everyone but THE SISTER. And you Wonder why she hate the family 🙄🙄, think OP are lying , so much is missing in the story...

[@alexbodi5526]

What’s the timestamp of that one?

[@karimygirl5826]

This whole video is about crazy families, please be specific ☺️ thanks 22:27

[@lillypharaoh5945]

If a father became a deadbeat for mental health issues and tried to come back people would rip him to shreads but here we are making excuses for this lady What if she relapses? How is he gonna explain to his child then? As the child of an inconsistent parent, if op has a 1% doubt that she will bounce from and into the kids life and still let's her into it then he's a worse parent than her and that poor child is doomed.

[@Jordan-bm8lp]

Sounds like you’re being sexist. I think all parents should have the opportunity to step away when life becomes all too much and not be judged for putting their health first. She’s not a dead beat mom. And if it were the dad he wouldn’t be a dead beat either. Just because someone gets help for an issue doesn’t mean it’s bound to resurface after it’s treated. Your harsh judgment of this woman seemingly comes from inexperience in life or lack of care and empathy for others. I think you should consider maturing a bit, but that’s just this internet random’s opinion. Toodaloo sexist! 💕

[@lillypharaoh5945]

@@Jordan-bm8lp sexist because I would hold both genders for the same standards? You might wanna recheck the definition of sexism or your own comprehensive capacity if you think so Being a deadbeat has no excuses you can get help while being a competent parent these two can come together no problem

[@emilybarclay8831]

She didn’t become a deadbeat. She sought treatment for her severe mental health crisis, which is the responsible thing to do, and did her best to keep up contact where possible. She did what she needed to to keep her son safe. She didn’t leave because she didn’t feel like being a mum. She made sure her son was safe, and then made herself a safe person to be around

[@vetaroberts3333]

That is outrageous, take care of her child. Nta

[@vetaroberts3333]

She needs to take care of her child,

[@sharonannrowland5783]

Why other religions? If you don’t like religion then why seek out different ones unless you do have a problem

[@caroltwigg5942]

baby micro daddy, and the mama who is lazy. ever thought they both sleep late and she needs her sleep, he wakes early, just a early baby. and I always cook first before i get the baby. walk crawl, at my feet s dangerous can get bunt and die of shock. happens more than you think. Have the baby on the chair, will can cry. Tell mama get an apnea machine. it will help with the tiredness. You are spying, but nothing looking for the baby and you comment to much. When you have your sleeping issue wife. baby needs to sleep to her pattern it wont hurt him. I sleep 4 hours a day when i sleep i wake up with in 2 mins of 4 hours from birth i been like this. use to be tired and i cant concentrate. now i have apnea machine i still sleep the 4 hours but i dont feel ill or slow. she needs to get off the phone and computer, its nore who is she having an affair with she cant put it down. its how i met my second husband. for 20 years never would thought it but when your addicted to somthing you will cave. 36 years married dated 5 years. turns out he was doing the same so we called it a day. 9 kids. we stll talk thats it

[@jessicacharlton7347]

The way everyone respoded to the woman who was mad that her inlaws were taking her kids to church, behind her back, after she specifically asked them not to and they agreed not to, is absolutely ridiculous. If this was a Jewish woman instead of an athiest, everyone would see the problem. Better yet, if this woman was christian and her inlaws were Muslim, everyone would be disgusted that these manipulative grandparents took their grandchildren to a Muslim church behind their Christian daughter inlaws back. This woman's inlaws agreed not to take the kids to church, then one day her kids came home asking to officially become members of their grandparents chuch and she found out that her inlaws had been indoctrinating her children behind her back all this time. Then she found out her fucking husband was in on the secret. All the blind idiots of Reddit helped gaslight this woman into thinking her inlaws did nothing wrong and that she did something wrong by trying not to let anyone, especially a trusted relative and authority figure, indoctrinate her kids while they're still so naive and easily manipulated. These grandparents intentionally took these kids to church behind their daughter inlaws back, then got the kids all excited about getting baptized so that it would be harder to tell the kids no and so the kids would see their mother as the bad guy for cancelling the baptism. These kids are young enough to fall for their grandparents manipulation so easily, yet they're old enough to decide for themselves? What the fuck is wrong with you people!? I'm disgusted that so many people think this manipulative behavior is okay just because it was Christian grandparents who indoctrinated the children of their atheist daughter inlaw.

[@lorifiedler13]

THIS. Thank you. Christians shouldn't get a pass because they are Christians.

[@sadie2melw]

The first story... I have a one year old. How dare the husband and other people try to judge the mother. When my son is home on the weekend, I would love for him to sleep in just so I can get our breakfast ready. If I get him up, I won't be able to eat breakfast myself. How is she being lazy when this is literally her job? If the baby is well fed and has no physical problems due to neglect, then she is doing her job right. When my son wants to get up, guess what? He cries! That's what babies do. Also, "sleeping though the night" does not mean every single night without waking up at all. My son sleeps through the night, but sometimes he poops in his sleep and cries because of it. Sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night because he is thirsty. 🤷🏾‍♀️