Narcissistic Supply: 3 Key Elements

[@michelleburstrom2548]

A narcissists world is like a cult of one person who is manipulating others to join their cult.

[@paulamiller6109]

That's a perfect analogy. Thank you.

[@MCP168]

This is exactly how I felt.

[@empress9857]

Right now then we get in and realize the fuckery n they beat us mad for breaching the contract we did not read the small lines nah after the bs we peep and we like we straight or pull our supply away they spaz/go bizurk it’s the emotional n Mehta torture for mehhhhhhhh god help us alll

[@hanakrsakova2894]

Yes, they're like a sect....I experienced that at work, it was so sick!

[@juliabaker7517]

A monstrous cult in case of covert narcissist. Such a contagious and infectious disease. Strongest sanitiser essential to protect ourselves and beloved ones.

[@Jesuslovesme32-m6l]

Today is my Birthday. My ex narcissist boyfriend wanted to take me to dinner, said he had a gift for me...well I'm feeling a bit melancholy ya know a bit lonely so I figured I'd go. THEN your video miraculously popped up and because of you I've decided not to go, I'd rather spend the rest of my day alone and be grateful. God put this video right in front of my face, so thank you both ❤

[@GreenVeggie]

Happy birthday! You made a good decision. 🩷

[@nugenthinking]

why are you still in contact with your ex narc? what happened to no contact..

[@alynnglo9172]

Good for you! Keep solid and go No contact - it's the only way - I tried every way, lost years, and finally went NO contact completely and that's the only thing that worked And even that was terribly difficult , til it worked , which took months

[@enednas801]

u must check out "trauma bonding" .he got u in that evil thing. break the bond and run away.

[@smoly37]

You can only keep in touch with a narcissist when you are truly and honestly free from their abuse. Sometimes you HAVE to stay in touch, fi when you have children together. My ex is partly narcistic, partly borderline. I believe that he also partly understands what he is doing, and partly is sometimes truthfully confused when I accuse him of certain things. When you don't know any better because you suffered at the hands of your own narcistic father from the age of 2, and you're also quite ignorant and want to stay ignorant you're F*CKED!!! I mean to say : not every narcissist is 100% evil or aware.

[@bostonjackson9384]

They don't care to hear "I love you"... what they want to hear is, "You are the most amazing person ever!"

[@Giove27]

My ex used to explicitly ask me to say I adore and love him. Multiple times a day if possible. What a mess of a person..

[@bostonjackson9384]

@@Giove27 One thing I have learned about narcs is that they are so lacking in self awareness that they often just outright tell you what they want, without any undestanding of how crazy they sound. My ex would always say, "you're treating me like your child", to which I would respond, "yes, and I treat my children like I love them, with all of my heart".... I mean, it should be a compliment to be treated like I treat my most precious people... her sense of entitlement and grandiosity caused her to believe shedeserved to be treated even better than our children...

[@Lily_and_River]

My husband never said "I love you" without me saying it first. He said it like he was a robot. I often asked him in the evening if he loved me or asked him for some sort of attention. It was purely my insecurity because I felt he didn't love me. I stopped asking for anything eventually because I realised he couldn't give anything and it would only hurt me more when he started to stonewall me.

[@kelvinjames6344]

Your happiness Is thier misery

[@maureenperry1169]

Aint that truth! Yet they spin it around saying you do that to them!

[@trailerparkcryptoking5213]

And your misery is their happiness....

[@michelejp69]

Totally agree, and when I'm miserable, that person is happy.

[@Sandra-p4q6x]

They turn their emotions on and off like a light switch!

[@lidijastanisic3437]

Nope, they don't have them. They turn on off as a form of manipulation.

[@ElisaAlice-d8b]

Idk emotional regulation is more of an empathic trait.

[@UnitedChick]

Yes!

[@alice-hp7dh]

You're right. They understand just admiration or hurt, they don't give a fu**about love.

[@marcirobins5144]

The most shocking thing to realize is that relationships are vertical but not horizontal with a Narc. They require it even to the point of absurdity.

[@southernpearl]

I don't know how many times I've said to him that I'm not his slave nor his boss, that we're equal. Now I just realized how I've been wasting my breath 🙄

[@l.5832]

If you want to leave a narc completely speechless, just say to them "I am equal to you". They cannot agree to this statement but they also can't disagree because they know the consequences if they do. They would lose supply, reputation and if you fall into the 'protected' category (race, gender, disability, etc) they could be charged. Any time I've said this to a narc, they are completely speechless....proving they are a narc.

[@pupper5580]

act for a second like you two are equal and they will take that as a narcissistic injury

[@marcirobins5144]

@@southernpearl THAT part!

[@TheRoyalFlush]

Yup. It's a power struggle through and through. There's no such thing as equality in their world. It's literally beyond comprehension. It's a form of retardation ultimately.

[@l.5832]

My narc mother would openly say that she lived in a world of her own. She would not be held accountable for any wrong doing. When confronted, she would say "That doesn't sound like something I would do' as if she were talking third person. Finally I said to her "You DON'T live in a world of your own. We have one earth and you're sharing it with 8 billion other people!" She is dead now, and I was disinherited but I have no regrets for when I spoke up.

[@l.5832]

@@rogerdawson3675 It depends entirely on where you live. I am not in the USA. Check the laws in the country where you live.

[@alariaesculenta8177]

@l.5832 He's right. For instance in Switzerland it's illegal to disinherit your kids, and the law will immediately overturn such a will.

[@JXakaJoshuaWills]

Likewise, my mom would tell me, "You must love yourself because I am not fond of children." I see now.

[@nicholecornes1915]

Freaking RIGHT!

[@ydnew60]

Thank you Richard. Makes absolute sense xx

[@cymbelinebritain6799]

"When you're lost in the bewilderness". What a wonderfully appropriate way to encapsulate that confusion and frustration.

[@Person-jn8pf]

Yes! ❤👏🏼 loved this. I have tried to learn some about cults but I’m going to do like he said also and look into them a bit more. Because it’s like we’ve heard we can’t fight or protect ourselves from a thing we can’t see or understand 🙏

[@lesleybrady3948]

It sent shivers through me! So intensely accurate! Every word 😮🙏

[@christinajeans7325]

I totally agree - "Bewilderness" captures it beautifully, and I would include"predator blindness".

[@CynthiaAva]

The perfect word: bewilderment.

[@alisonpatton5028]

They push you over edge until you become awakened then the blindfold is off there is no game then you see the game.There textbook warriors.The gift is being the light within

[@yanasungar9000]

All the time I watched you... I heard you. Then next moment he was showing up making me my fav food the sex you know the story. The first we met. He was just I was running to Now I know.. his narc step mother crying.. ran. And it was his dad's birthday. ... Locked in.. 9 years later... I always defended him. Or didn't remember... Hello to you. Now. I don't care like he thinks. He doesn't have my empathy to grow. And he's still looking for light in those actually culture pulling him lower. Does that sense Faust stuck but even his family said your just a doormat. But I didn't know I was a doormat for my light and breadcrumbs Took a long time. But thank you takes a long time to peel the layers. You weren't quick fix. Long time..2024

[@alisonpatton5028]

@@yanasungar9000 keep peace in your soul it's all you need

[@mfgee]

My neighbour is a vampiric narcissist and running out of victims. Sadly I’ve been the last one. I hope she gets fresh supply soon as she’s frothing for me although I cut the supply recently.

[@judithargitay9860]

One month mark of no contact, though I cut him off after 3 months of dating as I thankfully already know too much about narcissism. Still, can't tell you the toll it has taken on my body, my mind, even my health. I was baffled though this is not my first experience with narcissists (I was raised by one for one). Starting getting better and moving on, but I'm warning my fellow-survivors: run, run, run, they are pure poison.

[@karriesaunders8597]

It is shocking what a person goes through when entangled with a narcissistic family,pure evil.

[@scottdwyer646]

It seems that the rule and reign of narcissism is coming to an end, too many people are being delivered from their witchcraft spell, and becoming aware and alert and vigilant, we're finally seeing that the enemy really is like a lion roaming around looking for whom they might devourer....

[@maureenbennett809]

Truth!

[@AndrewFosterSheff69]

"Bewilderness"! I love it! I actually simply see that as the fact they refuse to give any kind of closure, so you are left hanging. Just walk away and go FULL NO CONTACT, YOU will always WIN, their lives are their punishment!

[@wendiworshamdavis4876]

That was freaking awesome.!!! A burst of clarity. I spent 26 years being bewildered… always mistaking acts that did not fit the wicked man paradigm, as act of repentance. The Molock analogy of it being a separate entity that is being worshipped and sacrificed to, was a huge Aha Aha moment for me. It is so isolating and oppressive to be married or involved with one of these people. It is so dark , it seems almost demonic!! So grateful for understanding and wisdom from people who have suffered and lived to not just overcome but to thrive.

[@GreasyBaconMan]

It is demonic!! They want your energy, it’s food to them!

[@lillyrose2514]

Definitely demonic.

[@MGobin54]

Molock is a demon, that's why Richard used that specific name.

[@Lily_and_River]

I met this Christian lady and she said my husband had many evil spirits which basically described narcissism. She literally said that he had a spirit of hate and anger and he thinks the whole world is against him. I was so happy somebody finally acknowledged the hate I had felt all this time. I didn't know about the narcissism yet. And most people would be afraid to point such things out.

[@RecoveringVictim]

Excellent insight into Narcissists mind. Not enough is said on religious narcissistic cults, as the cult leader literally positions themselves in between God and the victim, and effectively, replaces God altogether.

[@prismonthethehorizon5793]

Exactly when in reality you can go straight to God/ source/ universal energy instantaneously because you are, like everything in existence a part of it! You don't need to go to a place of worship to worship the everything, understanding and being in awe of it and plugging into the beauty of the oneness is enough. However I see the the appeal and we can find inspiration in the individuated expressions but it's important not to worship the particular vessel/entity such as a priest, prophet, cult leader teacher etc but to understand your own relationship with the divine, that does not require other people to validate your existence, you can find the beauty in all existence if that makes sense? I have been to many churches and offshoots of them but never integrated myself into a church. Armed with a little bit of knowledge of the narcissistic manipulations saved me from one particular cult that my friend took me to, it was a very low point in my abusive relationship this particular friend took me there, they all focused on me and recited prayer and sang to me directly ( love bombing) which was a beautiful and uplifting experience. The following meeting was where the leader was away in Jerusalem and so the sermon was being taken by another member, my friend was on stage playing keyboard ( she's a really good pianist) it was a lovely service. I spoke to her about her playing and how great she was at it anyway she informed me that she wasn't usually permitted to play by the piano by the cult leader because it was deemed as vain or something along those line ( red flag). So basically not allowing my friend to shine by using her god given gifts as it'll take the shine off the cult leader. I went for a third time, we went in the cult leaders car where she was banging on about why I'd not being going but it was manipulative in the way she was doing it as she was trying to guilt trip me, shame and put social pressure on me ( red flag). I've since looked into them and their backgrounds they are definitely cult leaders and unfortunately my friend is wasting her gift as she follows all the rules of this sect. They're also very pushy with the brainwashng, my daughter who was around 6-7 at the time was well aware of it, saying mum don't agree with them and I explained that my daughter had the right to believe or not believe as she has a free mind as they were trying to push their religious jargon on my daughter when she'd gone round to play with her son. I explained that I believe in God but you don't need to go to church.

[@GregtheGrey6969]

The new Jeep "duck" cult is stupid lol

[@wanderingseth]

Arguably many priests and pastors of regular churches could be accused of the same

[@ajniecithya5849]

In my opinion the christian god is a narcissistic abuser himself.

[@arrashealing]

Sounds like the Council of Nicea

[@UnlawfulVR]

I saw a funny comment on another video. If a narc discards you, go run into the street and do a dance 🕺 You are free. Run!

[@w.kranendonk5263]

Explains a lot going on in the bedroom as well: there is not just the two of you but a third party watching, hence the performative nature.

[@CynthiaAva]

This is so spot on! Something I have been thinking about for a long time. I thought it stemmed from his porn addiction--the overall feeling of indifference and inauthenticity.

[@Tamara-yz7vz]

You will try to prove over and over your loyalty,love,and give them your last penny. Then, one day, you will get so exhausted and tired of getting punished. There will be no end to the insanity of it all until you leave. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Take it from someone who almost died from the abuse of a narc. You are beautiful,worthy,and loving. Break the chains of the evil bonds. Pray and have faith.

[@cultivateyourself]

It's all true. What Richard describes is what I have witnessed In a different country with people he has never met. It's the way they are wired up. If you try and love them they have no real use for it. They are broken and they will break you.

[@kimmcfarland4861]

In one word…BRILLIANT!!!!!!! Every single word you spoke made perfect sense!! By far, the absolute best explanation I’ve ever heard, since starting on my journey to try to understand what the heck happened to me!!! I always felt like I was living in a science fiction movie/fantasy world. Clarity can only start to be found once you have escaped the matrix. Thank you 🙏🏻

[@southernpearl]

I just shared this video to myself. As a self-reminder at times when I'm "seduced" and starting to believe he could change. My best friend believes me 100%, but even she, a person who isn't "targeted" by him, can't comprehend what it really means to deal with a narcissist.

[@GreasyBaconMan]

It’s hard to wrap my mind around the Devilry that conduits the narcissist are for the dark Prince Satan himself. They are like there Father Satan.

[@UnlawfulVR]

I don't have any friends, family or psychologists who understand either. KZbin is an amazing resource

[@yah9489]

Most brilliant assessment of a narcissist I've seen and I watch videos every day trying to understand what happened to me. What you call a mulluk, I think of as a robot. I hate myself for being taken advantage of by him and being so damaged. But I actually feel sorry for him. He is just an empty vessel. He really can't feel love, empathy, sorrow, or hate. The emotions most of us feel that can be wonderful or awful but they make us what we are and makes life so wonderful, even the painful emotions. They make us real. They make us alive. The narcissist cannot be real because they feel nothing. They are fake humans. Dead. You barely touched on it, but I know I was part of the problem because I was part of the lie. I willingly believed all the false praise, love, and admiration he gave me in the beginning. We were actually feeding off each other. Thank You so much for helping me understand why I don't hate him. I feel deeply sorry for him. But I'm sure glad I'm free of him.

[@rhondacosta160]

i also feel deep sorrow but I sure am glad to be free

[@the_grassy_noel]

Yes! They are little Pinocchio's who never became a real person

[@annehedonia156]

That's why Jesus said, "Let the dead bury their dead."

[@delarfindale5539]

This makes a lot of sense. My narc is an older sibling who can't ever seem to be out on their own for long, before needing to be in a relationship with someone else or they move back in. Also makes sense that our relationship is vertical, they deepened on me to be their tag-along while hating my being their "follower". Once stopped my sibling decided to make me their verbal punching bag and began doing the love bombing & flying monkeys cycles. Unfortunately, I'm the only one in the family who seems them for being a manipulating narc. Everyone else is hoping they get their act together after being on earth for over 4 decades.

[@emmarae4322]

It's like they are below us during lovebombing building us up, then the switch happens during devaluing and they are on top and stay there. Scary, vertical relationship.

[@blue_gen8549]

My npd ex was "teaching" me about narcissism and people not taking responsability. It ended him telling me everything was my fault. The relationship and every problem he had.

[@marcirobins5144]

Projection is their superpower.

[@redsquirrel1086]

So in a two person relationship there are three people then. There is you; there is another person and then there is this false person that the other person is presenting themselves to be. No wonder it's such an energy draining experience.

[@neilmcdougall4927]

Triangulation....

[@CynthiaAva]

So draining. I can feel in my spirit the two different beings...He flips it on and off.

[@annai3394]

I’m still impressed how we have progressed as human beings and 20th century finally brought for us psychology. This became a turning point for whole humanity. I believe that we are just at the beginning of beating the cancer of our society- narcissism.

[@truthwarrior122]

The demons feed the devil and the devil feeds the demons. The cycle continues for infinity. That's why God invented heaven, a narcissist-free zone.

[@aloksrivastava7938]

Who do you think created the narcissists?

[@truthwarrior122]

@@aloksrivastava7938 Satan. And his evil lying authoritarian leftard narcissist bully demons.

[@shirleyann245]

I’m now on punishment and no longer contacts me!! 👍🏼👍🏼

[@Holly-d1n]

How did you manage this kind of punishment? Sounds like a miracle.

[@merin797]

I am also in the punishment phase…again!!!

[@pspence1963]

​@merin797 yes again. Again being key. It never ends with them

[@LadiesOfThePleiades]

You win!!! 🏆

[@clintonnagy1662]

Me too. Discard phaze and no contact.

[@simpatico4004]

Every time I think I’ve understood it, another more insightful video pops up.

[@UnlawfulVR]

I can't stop obsessing over this stuff. So interesting

[@Twinnzllc]

This was spot on and what I needed. I’ve gotten to where I’m not obsessing on these types of videos but occasionally I’ll see one and watch it and it is a pleasant reminder that I’m doing the right thing and life is good! Trust the process and not the emotions people! It does get better

[@clintonnagy1662]

Amen. Plan your work, then work your plan. I realize Im gonna put the work into healing and let go of the negativity that imprisoned me. Chains of illusion bound me to the wall but they no longer exist. I'm free. Those chains were never real. I made them real in my head from the abuse.

[@UnlawfulVR]

Congrats on getting over the obsessive research. It consumes me still but I'm forcing myself to stop. It's been 6 months now, I have heard all the info but I needed to be reminded daily still. This needs to be taught in schools

[@Twinnzllc]

@@UnlawfulVRcheck out the book Love is a choice. It helped me see some things about myself and why I’d find myself involved with certain people

[@ChosenOne1967]

Brilliant and true to understand they are trying to hurt you and need to hurt you. Stay away from these people.

[@WaterBug46]

‘Moloch’ and ‘bewilderness’. My two big eye opening and soul freeing moments from this video. That the narcs are not so much self serving as they are serving an inner entity that will sacrifice them as well as others. Oh wow. And bewilderness is the perfect visual description of narc confusion. For us learning and I think the narc as well by serving moloch. That high priest role is morally deceptive and destructive to both.

[@HarmonySoldier-mg7sw]

I have become the narcissist. Had no choice. Indoctrination from the beginning. Having all that woundedness dumped on me. It took til august 2022 before I saw the vengeful hatred she felt for me and treated me with. Man the healing pain is so brutal. She’s destroyed me globally. This morning I had a dream where I was bound wrists and ankles suspended from the ceiling and naked. That’s what she’s done to me. That’s where I’m healing from and where I have come from. This is exactly what I needed to hear. This is exactly what she is like. Even today she is 87 or 88 she still brings people in to smear me and turn their mind into vengeful hatred of me. It never ends.

[@libbypaige6160]

Thank you ❤. This explains soo much about why my mother never authentically feels my love. She definitely appreciates that it supports the delusion that she's a great mother, and if she has an audience that's x100. But she can't really ever connect with me and feel my love. It's going through that 3rd channel. She is definitely sacrificing her authentic self to the cause.. it's just soo bloody sad. 😢 thank you for your insight, it helps my heart understand.

[@Kittykat79NY]

Delusional is the key!! It's not reality it's their "truth"

[@Splatterpunk_OldNewYork]

"Always go Sci-Fi" - Richard Grannon. 2024

[@jurepotokar9068]

I see my narc as a Borg (Star Trek). Emotionless...

[@elkekirkpatrick6481]

@@jurepotokar9068 OMG I saw my schizoaffective husband as Borg! Yes, I called him Android also because he behaved like a machine, no feeling, just electrical switches controlled by his narcissistic mother, an empty shell remotely controlled. She died first, then he died, multiple dementia's and a couple of strokes, I'm rebuilding my life like I've stepped out of a horror movie back into the sunlight.

[@rhondacosta160]

The intrigue kept me going back. Now I understand it better but didn't realize they didn't even want genuine love. The behavior is too bizarre for me - I finally walked but it's not easy.

[@jeankipper6954]

Fascinating. New idea: "They don't even want love or intimacy. They don't have a place to put it.". Thanks

[@kcsunnyone]

I've just given up on any kind of romantic or love relationship. Raised by two divorced narcissists, I was raised as a source of supply by both parents which made me an easy mark for the narcissist I married who became my ex-husband after 10 years. A month after the divorce was finalized, I dated yet another narcissist monster for 20 years. About 5 years, I just stopped all romantic relationships and focused on me. So yeah, I'm done dating. My parents were so narcissistic that Tom Wolfe wrote a book about them in 1998 which Netflix turned into a miniseries which airs tonight: A Man in Full is about my real life parents. Jeff Daniels portrays my father -Felix Cochran aka Charlie Croker "The Trump of the South", and Diane Lane portrays my mother Joy Johnson. I may take the course of yours on how to spot them to avoid them though. I do think that would be helpful for me. I'm glad to see you back, Richard. You've helped a lot of people recover from being used and abused.

[@Wisdomseeker5]

We moved out from a toxic town (Cult mentality) My teen child autistic feels safe today. She was a target at classroom from teachers and peers. It didn't help when I exposed them. They got worst to my teen, but altso to my youngest child. Like No synging his birthday song, exclusion and sh##&* My teen is using her habilities to draw and singing to work out those negative memories. She is angry with a reason. It's fun to see the Art behind her trauma. It helps to overcome pain ❤

[@ThedaVonGurkenbeet]

Interesting! Toxic towns! So glad you mentioned that.. thought i was kind of paranoid or sth. ❤

[@arrashealing]

I'm autistic too; I think we autists and neurodiverse eg ADHDers, are for some reason more vulnerable to being prey.

[@Wisdomseeker5]

@@arrashealing Jepp 😮‍💨❤️

[@Wisdomseeker5]

@@ThedaVonGurkenbeet Our family are in recovery. Bullyng, isolation, smear, lack of opportunities. It took me 17 years to scape from this. Finally We got a plan. A quiet plan. It Was The pain of our kids who made us to End this nigthmare. They stalking us 🙄 well

[@ThedaVonGurkenbeet]

@@Wisdomseeker5 Sending you love and strength to overcome this nightmare. 🧡

[@elocat2511]

You’re on fire Richard! Thank you for that excellent explanation of the NPD.

[@lynnemelcombe1049]

The only thing I ever really wanted from my husband was an equal partnership. No matter what I did, I could never make that happen. He always had to be in control, one way or another, even if it was him playing the victim role while positioning me as the demanding bitch (which I wasn't). Now I know why.

[@ericb6390]

My narcissistic ex fiance did samething,always making decisions that involved me with her ex,without talking to me about any of it ever, and letting him message her multiple times daily "about the kids" and she also admitted he raped her for decades, yet she would still let him control everything that involved me,my health,my finances,etc...without letting me know til after the fact every time,never caring for my health or needs, then when we split up after finally seeing light about her too, she is major narcissist as well, and glad to be rid of them, they are evil human beings

[@CynthiaAva]

Yes, that victim role...They set you up in a situation and then play victim..then they get to cast you in the role as "abuser" or "problem" when they orchestrated the whole thing. Anything for control.

[@Wonderwall36]

"Jeff Bezos' slave warehouse", LOL, excellent. Really ejoyed this one, thank you, Richard.

[@creativesolutions6965]

Love me Some Richard Grannon ❤

[@marisolorosco4345]

After almost two years of meeting the narcissist who traveled through my whole being damaging it like a tornado, i am barely starting to be able to function and pick up the pieces. In the process, I’ve lost property that i owned, relationships that i spent years building with family and friends, my credit score, jobs, money saved, my self esteem, my self respect, my health (gained 50 lbs) and am not able to trust anyone due to the C-ptsd i now have. I want to continue to grow and get my life back. Thank God our divorce was finalized and he moved out of state. I cut like a foot off of my long hair on the process to shed him and he actually had the nerve to reach out to me and tell me “I’m not done with you.” And “you think because you cut your hair short that i wouldn’t think you are pretty but i still do”. He is such a creep. As if no matter what i do he lives in my mind. I’m going to be buying that book soon. Thank you Richard for all you do. That unstable pathetic piece of a man cannot take up space in my mind any longer.

[@karenbradley6304]

I've been through this too. I pray you find peace and security 🙏

[@bonnieplummer5933]

❤ that’s awful. I’m so sad to read that. Keep going

[@primalway1]

That voyeuristic aspect probably aids them in the discard. They never really knew you or received any love from you. It's a convenient character to slip in and out of. Sad , frustrating. Excellent work Richard, you've been eating your primal whey..

[@sokoleski]

THIS really helps! Thank you Richard for exceptional clarity....these nuances really make the difference !

[@RICHARDGRANNON]

Glad it was helpful!

[@MrBrady95]

Richard, have you ever seen a 2003 documentary film called, "The Corporation?" While it's a creative take, the film has a perspective where it "diagnoses" the corporation, asking, "if it's a person, what sort of person is it?" It basically diagnoses the corporation as a narcissist and psychopath. I'm just curious if you've seen the film and what your opinion is about it? Thanks.

[@humbob2845]

Very important to notice how they sacrifice the grown up honesty in the process of using interactions for supply. Great vision!

[@retrogore420]

The depth of your analyses and insight is inspiring. Thank you for all the inner work you’ve done. You’re a beacon of light.

[@Meechl]

I’ve experienced this with an ex and work colleague. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. This has been ongoing for over 20+ years. I’ve had to live with the smear campaigns by holding my head up high and show indifference. What struck me the most was those who believed the lies and those who didn’t! It has affected relationships with neighbours, strangers and colleagues. In turn I have witnessed their Karma which they never saw coming.

[@Holly-d1n]

The problem is we all fail as supply, that one time we slip up and can't provide a trophy when they've had to mow our lawn, was the end for all of us. The four course meal we painfully sacrificed for did not compensate. We were going to be punished, by never receiving a complement again. If that isn't enough to fix us we will be blamed for everything that wasn't 💯 percent to their satisfaction. Every mishap in their life was our fault and we will have to be replaced. Thank you God!

[@mightymouse1005]

The greatest gift a narcissist can give you is a discard. Block and NO contact. Never ever give them another chance

[@Mike-ce6vr]

@@mightymouse1005 - Or you discard them first.

[@justmontina]

1:21 watching videos like this has really help me deal with the narcissist in my life. I understand how to be emotionally mature, no longer contribute to narcissistic supply without understanding that’s all it is, supply, and realizing that the love from them truly isn’t real.

[@davidllwilliams]

Wow, thanks for this. I am increasingly aware of what is happening in my failing marriage. For many years I have sensed that my wife has a false facade and that displays of love and affection simply don’t “land on her”. This video has nailed it for me. I will need to watch this several times in order to internalise and process the info here. Thank you Richard, this is a real moment of clarity for me.

[@karenbradley6304]

I saw the narcissist from the perspective of being a passenger in a friend's car one day, hence he was unaware that I had seen him driving his tractor along the road. I met up with him later, and said this to him, "I saw you earlier, on your tractor.. like a Knight upon his stead.. looking down your haughty nose at everyone else." He matter of factly replied, "That's how it is." You've really summed him up. His farm was his cult, it had to be kept going no matter what, and I was sucked into helping him keep the dream alive. He had no use for love, as you say. He admitted that he "didn't know how" to love and expected me to accept that. I had been single for years before my involvement with him, and after 6 months, retraumatised .. I left him for the third and final time. Thanks for this video Richard.. It has clarified the situation for me. It's as if you know this arrogant guy.

[@lesleybrady3948]

Jesus Christ almighty - pun kinda intended 😳.. this is freaking genius.. what a mind blowing accurate description!! Like wow right now!!!!!!!

[@Bea-wb9uk]

7:22 The "fascinating open ended subject" lure of NLP.

[@53gb]

Thanks!

[@CHANTARELLA]

the important thing to remember is when you go into therapy as a victim of a narcissist it isnt so much about understanding the abuser- but it is about learning about yourself ans what you got out of it. It's about the attraction. So the remedy isnt outing the narcissist- it is really about outing the abused person who subsocniously get his own supply from the narcissist

[@davidbiddle3257]

Bewilderness, perfect description of what I went through. The Molloch, perfect idealization of what controlled our family. Vertical interactions, another perfect description. I was punished, my sister and brother have the holes. I left them, physically and emotionally, my siblings still bring up my wrongdoings and both have been dead for over 20 years. My father once told me when I was 17 that I wouldn’t know love if it was staring me in the face-at the time I believed him and lived my life accordingly-I now know what a damning piece of evidence he gave me about the two of them. Neither could teach me love, I learned it outside of my home, but, I learned it and experience it now.

[@einahsirro1488]

The Bewilderness... man, what a great term. My mom is one of these covert types, and I live in the Bewilderness.

[@KarenCavanagh-c9o]

THANK YOU! The insight and survival/recovery tools that i have gained from your videos have been life and soul saving. I have endured a lifetime of a narcissistic mother that once reduced me to rubble. The phoenix is now rising from the ashes. Everyone please get educated about narcissism, apply the techniques and walk away from the abuse . Complete freedom and happiness awaits. Namaste

[@TreysMythsandTunes]

Thank you, brother for a succinct explanation of this Uber issue. In my grandiosity I have to wonder if (coming from a cnpd cult family,) and being one of those amateurs who tried to share their gnosis here, (less loved by the beast,) I might've inspired some of this - with my chat comments on your great LIVE yesterday. I have noticed this _superironic_ tendency, that obviously, "talking down to you" like an unaware parent 5:21 _they_ are your daddy, yet they are the one acting like a three-year old (emotionally.) Good one.

[@Vegan4life555]

Brilliantly explained . Thank you Sent from Manchester UK

[@chaz7604]

Hey!! I’m in Manchester… just thought I’d send that haha 😂

[@christiangrey1214]

U got me at J Bs slave wear house 🤣🤣

[@tragedy-and-comedy]

Just giving a like and comenting to support the algorythm in Gratitude to Richards work. But I cannot listen to one more video about narcs. My time and energy is for me now

[@Stevand92]

The first picture of someone open the mirror in the car was clearly what happened with my narcissist ex. She always looking at herself through that mirror in the car and leave it open for the rest of the day. This man really know what he's talking about 🙏

[@lisahead6868]

Bewilderness!?!?!! Genius. Epic short session. 😊 Yes yes yes it was a generational family cult and I’m seeing it for what it/they were for the first time. Both grandmothers jeez

[@TheWendyhan0120]

Sooo good!! Here I am trying to offer a friend a safe place to get her life together. She is just using me , doing exactly what she was doing and only using me to make the downfall slower...it's crazy to witness. I said no. Now she is using my kid's library card, checked out 20 books and left.😅

[@xrppornstar9483]

Solid presentation. Very thorough and salient points with a tie in at the end. Loved it.

[@charityrose5598]

When you talked about the difference between horizontal and vertical it shook me to the core. I, literally screamed out loud. I can't begin to tell you how spooky and haunting this was for me and what happened when you explained all this.

[@MikeG-2022]

A Valid Definition of a TRUE Narcissist..... ONLY THING they Care about is their PRECIOUS Reputation to Keep their Filthy Web going FOREVER

[@antonbarth1370]

Its always astonishing how clear and direct you are able to present this. Really I love the content explanations and the way you present it. It helps a lot🙏

[@Mishmixalot]

Adoration and validation and fantastical statements of their beauty is more appealing to them than a deep unconditional love you have to offer them.

[@Musicandfilms7]

Thank you so much for explaining the third self, I have a narcisistic elderly mother and she's a nightmare, now I understand why my love goes nowhere

[@maryholton162]

Understanding that I was only supply and that it was not a reciprocal relationship was a key element of my healing.

[@claireplauche7724]

Lololol..right on! My narcissistic sister that I've also tried to help for a really long long time...told me our relationship "isn't about love"...Uhhhh.. OKAY... Couldn't process that until just Right Now. Fascinating. Its also coupled with addiction.. trying to get some support for myself and family. The ver al abuse and manipulation around her behavior is very disturbed. That vertical relationship is so evident now. Thank you so much.❤

[@eponymous_graphics]

Perhaps your most informative, if not poignant video in recent archive. This was brilliant. Looking at the emotion of love as an element to possess and give presents a physical reality to the failure of being in a narcisistic relationship; i.e. "they don't want love. They don't want your love even if they did they have no place for it" -- Richard Gannon. Absolutely brilliant. Well done.

[@samanthapeacock]

Richard I can’t even explain how much your videos have helped me.

[@elizabethgreenberg6007]

So brilliant and so true- spot on

[@brendaplunkett8659]

When my narc husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I got on the computer day and night reading on up on treatments and found some promising studies. He looked at me and said, " You really do love me, don't you?". Like it was total surprise to him. WTF? What have we been doing then? Seeing inside their mind is so alien, not in the good way.

[@alexanderalguire8064]

"You can either go fantasy, or you can go sci-fi, alwasy go sci-fi" Bro you crack me up. Thank you for making a really hard topic a lot easier. I feel. like I have studied this repeatedly in life, but have to re-learn it every damn relationship (I haven't had many due to fear of this, kind of keep flopping back in the cycle). But your videos have really helped with a lot and you speak in a way that feels safe and comforting. And the little comments and geeky references and structure, just speaks to my soul man. I appreaicte your demeanor and humor and the help your videos bring🧙‍♂

[@arleenschenke978]

"lost in the bewilderness" -- love it! A perfect word spin

[@denisebuethe9462]

This explanation is supremely helpful. Thank you 🙏

[@MrNahatej]

That horizontal vs vertical comparison is spot on!! Exactly how I've been thinking of it. Thanks for confirmation.

[@XI24]

This is exactly how it is, I am married to one, 16 years now and just beginning to realise this

[@sandys2672]

Wow Richard! Its like the narcs are middle management in the Bewilderment Company. Love the way your mind work; it tames the imaginary scary beast.

[@dashapaul4448]

Wow every time I talk to my friends and listen to these things, I start waking up to the games they were playing. When we met we were 19 and now I’m 21. I can see what he was doing to me and I realized how lucky I was to get out earlier!

[@wilcekmay9052]

i've experienced all of this and more, so i understand that well and i can tell ya all guys- this is very good material. Hope all people will open their eyes and understand who narcissists are and run away from them.

[@scottdwyer646]

Wow! I think this is some of the best Insight I've heard yet, it's right in line with what I've been pondering as I keep having to deal with a myriad of narcissists in my sphere

[@MT-tx7bu]

Richard, this makes so much sense to me. I came to understand that there was nothing wrong with the way in which I cared for that someone, it's that they couldn't receive it. They'd point out everything I was doing wrong with no problem, but when I would try to do what was "right" I was still wrong. I mean, come on! That's where you question yourself and your abilities. Matrix is a great way of seeing this.

[@joprescott1980]

Intrigue is right. An understanding of ‘what the hell just happened’ makes it easier to run away. The vertical and not horizontal relationship explains so much, as does their not knowing what to do with love. I was 18 months free of him but then I let him back. Seems I needed more pain to finally ‘see’ that there was never anything I could have done differently and I have not failed. It’s me that I need to work on and not some misery inducing relationship with a figment of my imagination. Thank you Richard for using words and analogies that make sense in the “bewilderness”.

[@noisydogs]

5:37 - WOW. This explains so much.

[@jameshoffman3614]

This explains all the issues i ever had with my toxic father. About 2 years without speaking to him and doing the best i have ever done in life. The healing takes awhile but will come.

[@weerallinfluxanthazgood3456]

Wow - this is such a sharp portrait of the mechanics of coercive control. I feel like you could pick this model up and it would illuminate any dynamic, especially religious contexts. The character of the stick you are herded with by individuals or in group settings, can be any shape at all - from cruelty, to loving kindness and every paradox, contradiction and shape in between.

[@dbiedler]

Thank you for elucidating that distinction about supply.

[@peat_dont_repeat]

Great video!!! The cult I realized after my life was destroyed was a mafia. A very powerful one that uber rich people need.

[@BarbzSA]

This made so much sense! The Narcissistic false self being this idol that is sacrificed to. Helps me to be more objective. 🎉