“never Try COCAINE” Matt and Shane Secret Podcast ft. Matt McCusker and Tony Hinchcliffe

[@SmaxSyrup]

For the FULL UNEDITED Podcast and Hilarious Interview watch Matt and Shane’s Secret Podcast episode ft. Tony Hinchcliffe

[@greggburke7796]

I only tried cocaine once. I didn't know what the hell I was doing because I was so whacked out on heroin at the time.

[@mason1807]

Matt is so fkn funny. It’s true what they say, “you come to the pod for Shane, you stay for Matt”

[@Schitcum]

Dude Ive watched shane for a year or two now completely ignorant of his podcast. Then I find matt doing a special of sorts on youtube and the whole time I’m like dude is this shane’s brother or something? They talk so similar in terms of cadence and such… then find out they’re best friends 😂

[@johncee]

They/them say the truth

[@smokedoutpositivesquad1738]

@@Schitcumone of Matt’s brothers is a mix of Shane and Matt it’s wild

[@basedyoungman7687]

@@smokedoutpositivesquad1738gay bill

[@milkDidMybodyGood361]

You got the saying wrong. "You come to the pod for The Dawg but you stay for The Shaman.

[@justinm2434]

Telling a kid "let this be a lesson for you" after him getting the shit end of the stick is wild 😂

[@brodiecalvert8149]

Happened to me one time when my gfs dad wanted to harbor his friend with a warrant and they showed up with a search warrant when he wasn’t home and we had to deal with it and he said let this be a lesson how to deal w cops like fuck are u talking ab?

[@bobbycorps7891]

The dope is so beautiful 😊😊😊

[@Kyle-k4w]

My best friend grew up in a crack house with his sisters and mother addicted to heroin and crack. He never touched anything besides drinking a few beers at times. Being around addicts can be the best drug prevention.

[@machiasburrell4143]

​@@Kyle-k4w facts

[@funnydonor9484]

I’ll take things that didn’t happen for 500 Alex

[@hambone7181]

I tried cocaine once for about 7 years 😂

[@smax4895]

You too?

[@Chitown312]

“I hate ❄️ I just love the way it smells” 😂

[@Noname-qw2kb]

I must have a gene inside me that makes it repulsive

[@blakake]

Stolen joke 😢

[@PPSH-Riley]

Lol still in that phase rn sadly

[@jaredreinstein719]

Cedar point sounds like a rehab facility which is ironic asf

[@snowman8962]

It actually is lol

[@ThaGreatWhite813]

Cedar Hills, been there twice lmfao

[@sergiv5613]

It's an amusement park

[@bobbycorps7891]

I absolutely 💯 adore DOPE😊😊😊

[@HandlingItAll]

​@bobbycorps7891 sounds like a potential problem... 😅

[@juanrobles2803]

Just know if you try cocaine, you NEVER I repeat NEVER wake up with cocaine 😂

[@jackgrady8893]

We need to get back on crack I mean back on track

[@taylorwebb1512]

Nothin like a lil morning bump and run before work

[@Elsancho24]

@@taylorwebb1512sickness

[@puppytooth.v6502]

​@@jackgrady8893iasip reference?

[@jackgrady8893]

@@puppytooth.v6502 haha never waking up with more crack reminded me of it

[@jenniturtleburger3708]

The soul death when coming down is brutal.

[@HenryHD88]

It was soul crushing u felt like the scum of the earth.

[@kronogatez5995]

This is why I haven’t touched coke yet, all my buddy’s do it and are fucking miserable the next day. I always tell my self, is grinding my teeth and telling the same story’s over and over worth waking up with a sore nose and feeling like death? The trade off just doesn’t seem worth it.

[@michaelsbrunner]

That's what heroin is for.

[@curtis7706]

@@kronogatez5995 lol nah dont fuck with it you've got the right idea. you get a few minutes of massive dopamine and then its gone, time for another line

[@A50481]

My experience is with good stuff you don't get that ugly feeling

[@andromedahearme63]

Just one more line and I'm calling it a night. 20 minutes later: Okay, this is the last one. 3 hours later: Hey man, you mind if I swing by for another 8 ball.

[@DiamondSupplyC0]

Story of my life until I had my kid. Nah I ain't got time for that shiz or I sure as fuck would 🤣🤣🤣 it's a blessing and a curse. Find a woman at the casino with my girl and have a fucking ball. Life was like a movie for a while

[@kedabro1957]

You have 69 likes.

[@sandhanitizer15]

​@@DiamondSupplyC0finding women at the casino while having a few 8 balls was definitely the thing to do for a while lol...i never had a girl already with me though, you dog lol

[@DiamondSupplyC0]

@@sandhanitizer15 well it wasn't our idea at first. Some lady approached us and wouldn't leave us alone so I started joking and the jokes soon became reality. 🤣

[@sandhanitizer15]

@@DiamondSupplyC0 lol, hey, no judgement here! I'm sure you'll remember that night for the rest of your life

[@upperechelon5692]

Had the same experience with Riff Raff giving me a "dont do drugs" talk while busting lines in the basement of a Club back in the early 2010's

[@kchannel9464]

Epic

[@theshittybowman]

Lmao

[@bickyboo7789]

Now that sounds like a good memory

[@evannatland5151]

Never BUY cocaine. Try it all you want tho 😂

[@cryspyd]

That's pretty accurate about most people I know who've done it lol

[@jbayley6963]

True³

[@hotbrasst2451]

This is 100% true

[@oldkingcrow777]

Problem is having the will (or fear lol) to not buy it lmao. If you're an addict type person, do NOT meet the friend of a friend who has the good shit 😂

[@jare2067]

nah that’s how you overdose on fentanyl 😂

[@lil-soda-boi]

Matt's "Oh no!" sounded so genuinely concerned lol

[@bigisrick]

That's a man that's been to Cedar Point before

[@Djgom3312djshw]

The worst part of cocaine is running out of cocaine 😂

[@Unmaleable]

Even worse is having to quit

[@firstnamelastname2552]

A buddy of mine took me over to his uncle's place and when we went inside his uncle was sitting there with cocaine and all of the trimmings sitting on the coffee table. His uncle was furious for bringing me over there unannounced and demanded that I do some cocaine in order to set him at ease. I had no desire to do it but I did a bump just to make the guy relax. Then I realized hey that's not so scary, I could do another one of those no problem. We ended up sitting there snorting coke all night and that's how I became addicted to cocaine for the next couple of years. Happens that easily.

[@Rembo318]

Nah u just obviously had the will power of a fuckin infant…dont blame the product for your shortcomings lol

[@natebaxter9551]

Leave. It's that simple.

[@yourauntie2601]

Dummy

[@nickf8268]

@@natebaxter9551the mistake was taking the first bump. Cause it’s not that scary. The scary part is you never want to stop taking that little bump, cause it’s not so scary….

[@Harib_Al-Saq]

Or just choose not to do it.😂 Lmao

[@GoatsArePeople2]

I don’t miss that stuff thank the lord for not killing me I’ve struggled all year til I lost a friend to drugs and alcohol now I’m just sad and sober. Don’t do drugs guys

[@BiteSized_]

Josh is the best producer- knows when to laugh- so funny

[@DonovanKelly27]

Lemorp, Superstar Gardini & Evil hippie intern Noah run laps around Josh. Just the facts.

[@BiteSized_]

@@DonovanKelly27I miss Noah’s laugh

[@DonovanKelly27]

@@BiteSized_ dude was baked 😂

[@daveysquier]

what other pods does he do?

[@_thomyorke_]

@BiteSized_ Too soon my brotha

[@MeMyself_andAI]

"I dare you... try not to finish, your cocaine! What do they put in that stuff? Ciga-rettes?"

[@TheGreatBambi]

I heard they put cocaine in cocaine. I also heard at the end of a rainbow, is a bag of cocaine.

[@Bran_Flakesx7]

Damn as a mere stoner it feels like Master of Puppets was an understatement

[@ChefCurry420]

Bro that’s just dumb u must be on it heavy as you typed that

[@TheGreatBambi]

@@ChefCurry420 Imagine not getting the joke, then thinking the one that said it is dumb cause you don't understand. How people can be so conceited amazes me.

[@ChefCurry420]

@@TheGreatBambi your a clown buddy if you that that was funny your fucked

[@ElTeerino]

Cedar Point is amazing so this is real trauma

[@kedabro1957]

You have 69 likes.

[@andrewl6837]

@@josephps221that shit was lit

[@bigisrick]

​@@kedabro195796 now

[@soulfireclash2882]

Was lucky as a kid my Dad docked his boat there. I still love to go there. If he was a kid and thought he was going this is definitely trauma.

[@cjlive5182]

When I was a kid I thought it was called “See My Point” because of the space needle.

[@rachel_Cochran]

Nothing worse for an Ohio or Indiana kid than not getting to go to cedar point

[@hoodrattt6196]

Michigan!

[@czaraesthetics3299]

Hey now, don’t forget about Michigan

[@mrarivv0007]

Pa is literally closer than both of those states. Smh. Tf

[@DrewElGringasho]

I can't stand the rivalry between michigan and ohio we are kindred spirits and have some unique experiences that only our region understands.. indiana and chicago is in their too of course.. Chicago and Detroit has so much cultural influence on where I'm from and we all do basically the same stuff

[@kalebg2002]

@@DrewElGringashoFuck Ohio Stats!! Big blue FTW

[@thatguybrooke]

Just don't... It's takes you further than you want to go, keeps you longer than you want to stay, and costs you more than you want to pay! 😢 Learn from other people's mistakes!

[@Dusty_VH]

Very true

[@HandsomeBastard]

Some lessons cannot be learned by proxy. Unfortunately.

[@JohnnyLandscape]

Well said.

[@Eyeb1z]

bars

[@sconez82]

This is 1 of my fav pod eps ever

[@aesop2733]

If you're ever considering cocaine, just go buy a cactus and eat it and rethink your life

[@pluto8404]

peyote cactus?

[@aesop2733]

@@pluto8404 peyote takes a long time to grow. But San Pedro, Bolivian Torch and Peruvian torch grow relatively quickly in comparison so they're cheaper and easier to acquire or grow. lophophora williamsii trichocereus bridgesii trichocereus peruvianus trichocereus pachanoi

[@marcosgin777]

Honestly

[@bobbycorps7891]

I absolutely 💯 ADORE DOPE!!!😊😊😊

[@Kyle-k4w]

Can tell you haven't tried it but here giving advice. If you don't have health problems why not try it out once if you have the opportunity. Nothing wrong with doing it every once in awhile just don't do it multiple days in a row and you won't have to worry about getting addicted. I smoke crack when it's free once a month or 2. Never had a problem with that. Opiates are what you need to be careful with especially after surgery. That's what got me was pain then multiple surgeries.

[@DoktorTeeth]

Remember how fuckin horrible it feels when you hear the birds start chirping and it starts to get light out?

[@dillpickle390]

This !!

[@CashensPowerwashing]

if you dont have to work, no problem, if you do have to work and havent slept its hell on earth 😂

[@tims6582]

You mean this morning ?

[@CashensPowerwashing]

@@tims6582 yea.... lol you too? 😂

[@ryantoth6700]

@@CashensPowerwashing😅

[@KeG86PI]

Mind over matter, mind over drugs. Get strong and control your mind, be disciplined. If you can do this you will never get addicted to any drugs you consume. Addiction comes in 2 forms physical and psychological. Be in control or lose yourself

[@henrynord8401]

Shout out to the Dawgs

[@forgettablelisa]

The only short on KZbin where the added music is a good thing

[@mokkaveli]

Tony laughing like a mf vampire at the end 😂😂

[@johntucker9912]

“Nothing we would rather do than take you to cedar point.. except for cocaine..” 😂😂😂

[@zeroreyortsed3624]

"it turns all your bad feelings, into good feelings." "I think I'd like to try some C'caine." 😂

[@soulfireclash2882]

Don't do it! It's terrible! You'll start the punk genre if you try it.

[@zeroreyortsed3624]

@@soulfireclash2882 my vague joke paid off. 😂 I like doing them sometimes just to see if someone gets the reference 😂

[@aaronmartinez6621]

​@@zeroreyortsed3624Dewy coxs man

[@Frank7489]

Matt so good at keep the bit going. He has a rlly good grasp on what makes something funny and how to flesh out a premise. Shane’s said (I’m paraphrasing) he knows he has a good stand up bit when the topic is something Matt gets excited about

[@jaydyer6682]

“Do or do not theres no try” -yoda talking about cocain

[@LaRueOutdoorsAndMore]

Them next day plans will have you feeling so bad 🤣

[@EtopiaCA]

You cant ever forget the feeling of coke but if you can stay on top of your habits its fun as fuck lmao

[@JooDawg]

Glad you’re on red thread!

[@BIGYARD]

My dad once told me after he got clean that he would’ve traded me and my sister for a bag of heroin😂 it’s not funny but it is

[@samestes8069]

It is very addictive ruined so many lives its so hard to quit it will destroy you and every thing you have will be gone ...god bless ..some peaple online still make it look fun and don't show the bad part. ..😢😢

[@paulbuffano985]

I remember I was meant to go to cedar point as a kid in the mid 90s. My folks brought me to my grandparents place the day before so I could spend the night there and they’d pick me up the next morning before we all drove to the theme park. I was so young that the plan didn’t seem suspicious or fucked up to me.. turns out they fuckin bailed on me and were just dropping me off there for the weekend because I was so young and they thought I’d be too scared to ride any of the rides and would blow the trip for them and be a chore. I remember waking up the next day and my grandma breaking the news to me and I was crushed lol no roller coasters for me, but I did get to climb up the antenna tower of my grandmas house to clean the gutters for her while I was on the roof… that was my theme park ride.

[@4Mikes4Mindset4]

Ouch. Trauma #364

[@Solorflare99]

Why did this get sadder with each sentence. I was waiting for the turning point and it never came😭

[@jacks1bonnielass]

How old were you tho? Depending on your age, I could understand why (considering I’ve seen a lot of kids who were tall enough to get on some rides but did ultimately chicken out), but I wouldn’t have lied to you. That was messed up bro!

[@dann6065]

@@Solorflare99Because that’s real life haha

[@paulbuffano985]

@@jacks1bonnielass off the top of my dome probably like 7/8. I can find out tomorrow just to keep it real haha I bring up this story to my mom any chance I get so I’ll find out.

[@jameswebber9041]

Fascinating, can't wait for the movie

[@Mappy8899]

“Get out of here Dewey, you don’t want no part of this sh*t”

[@pillarist8517]

Vespillo - Reefer is a song with that lyrics/vocals

[@nickstrom2306]

It'll turn all your bad feelings into good feelings😂😂

[@Atopp-zi9xx]

Lmao this is so funny while I’m yaked on coke at 1:30 am 😂

[@AidianFuckinBOB]

Literally same

[@HowieRaps]

First 2 times I did cocaine it was trash, third time it was the real deal but the price wasn't 😂 real easy choice when you're broke 🤣

[@moralhazard1]

"edge of an infinity pool" is so god damn hilarious 😂😂😂

[@SmaxSyrup]

😂 Matt’s the best

[@christycullen2355]

I ended up really liking the smell of it for about 15 years. A year clean in April thank fuck

[@theshittybowman]

Congratulations bro!

[@Camjidi]

Cedar Point and Kalahari are the only positive things about Ohio. We had a coke filled weekend in Kalahari in high school and it’s one of my top memories for sure.

[@nicholasvallas9802]

A joke so powerful it influenced a movie to make the same joke about 15 years ago. Walk Hard Tony

[@obowurx6625]

Another one of Tony’s stories that probably never happened

[@ZacchaeusNifong]

I'm still trying 🌬️ to make sure I still like it. 😅

[@GrizzTurner]

Truth

[@Francisco-g4u]

Damn where was this video when I was asked!🙄😂😂😂

[@williebanks81]

That shit is an angel and a devil.

[@syntheater4867]

Emphasis on devil 😅

[@HellWrex]

The devil was an angel. Makes sense

[@SaltStorm007]

The rain was hilarious....

[@brnzn1009]

I hate cocaine......love how it smells, tho

[@farfromirrational]

Nice setup, I was all excited to hear Tony give some life advice to kids.....what was I thinking 😂

[@HazeyJay]

Lmao. Where I come from the only way you find out about someone overindulging in the nose candy is when the electric bill isnt getting paid and thats why you get warned to stay away from it... cedar point 😂

[@K1forMVP]

Another way you find out is your friend has white crust around his nostrils far too often and randomly starts pimping his gf out offering up Blowjobs for $100 ILMAO 😂😂.

[@amanSpawn00]

Gotta say, that fit he described is like the stereotypical white boy fit in damn near EVERY movie😂

[@thomasstruebingjr1514]

I have a similar story by father had a heart attack

[@tedseb7726]

That’s heart to hear. I cardiacknowledge that must’ve been tough on you. Hearts rarely attack unprovoked tho, you never know. I know. They don’t know like I know. And I know you know I know they

[@Bemani-v9e]

That set-up was art

[@johnnyhammersticks88]

The last time I did coke I felt like I was actually dying for the next two days. I used to do it when we were out sometimes (I live in Miami lol) but I never bought it. That last bag crushed me tho. That was 4 years ago lol. Never again.

[@thomaskovacs5094]

Try meth instead 😂

[@AndreeewP]

You must have got a fenty bag. Here in San Diego the rich Mexicans I worked with would get Lavada which was almost cotton candy flavor and so friggin good, you could still eat a full meal after a night of bumpin it up.

[@johnnyhammersticks88]

@@AndreeewP maybe. But I doubt it. My buddies (that always bought) had a little dropper that they put on a small amount to test whenever they picked up. (In Miami we were very scared as fet swept through) but maybe. I was very very drunk and I think that both withdrawals together just gave me an unprecedented hangover. We always had pretty good stuff and as far as I know they always used that little dropper bottle first to test. But either way I’m done. Prolly had over 500 times doing it. But idk. It was paired with me stopping drinking at the same time.

[@K1forMVP]

When I was partying a lot I always carried Coke with me despite the fact I barely used and didn’t much care for Coke but women on the other hand LOVE that shit. I’ve gotten so many BJs from thee hottest women because I had coke, that’s why I always carried an 8 ball on weekends when I’d go partying and club hopping.

[@Smashmymom]

@@K1forMVPprobably keep that to yourself lol

[@billyrussell8684]

I remember crying when I was younger because my brother stopped chilling with me for drugs and shit. And the cycle just repeats over and over unless I do the drugs with him…and I stopped enjoying “hard” drugs a long time ago so don’t really do that anymore either. The joke was funny but hits hard at the same time. Love tony

[@TimothyMcVeigh69]

Im proud to say that in half a year ive been clean for 2 weeks.

[@NoBuddyLovers]

Right on ❤

[@ruggeddiamond71]

Eh, I’ve had both “great” and “shitty” kinds and wasn’t impressed. Offer me 5g of mushrooms and we have a deal tho 😂😂

[@dingledangle120]

Okay

[@Abdullah_D_Luffy]

Meth and cocaine rock, but I only do it when someone else is paying 😂

[@666sk8erguy]

Tweaker

[@Abdullah_D_Luffy]

@@666sk8erguy not Coke Rocks, cocaine (rules) Rock’s

[@666sk8erguy]

@@Abdullah_D_Luffy im talking about the meth bro bro

[@666sk8erguy]

@@Abdullah_D_Luffy Coke’s one thing but crystal’s another

[@Abdullah_D_Luffy]

@@666sk8erguy just lasts longer; like LSD. I’ve only done it 6 times in 5 years. Cocaine only 5 times in 2 years (total coke and meth of my life)

[@mattwilliams6769]

It’s always the trauma that sticks out. You don’t think about how 99.9% of the time life is amazing.

[@donquixote3032]

Why is Tony so hilarious? 😂😂

[@Scorch-Bad-Men]

They arent kidding, my friend zach tried it once and fried his dopamine receptors

[@doublehamsandmitch1108]

Literally just excuses. You can rehabilitate if you choose to do so

[@Scorch-Bad-Men]

@@doublehamsandmitch1108 ok addict

[@Johncenaloveschina]

@@doublehamsandmitch1108 damn bro just quit doing the shit maybe and you wouldn’t have to lol.

[@doublehamsandmitch1108]

@@Scorch-Bad-MenIt’s always heartwarming to see degenerates like you throw insults when presented with facts. If the truth bothers you so much, why do you risk running into it by reading other people’s opinions?

[@Graamthenav]

He's actually right the dopamine builds its some back naturally over time of not using coke idk about other drugs

[@EsotericMindsets]

Don’t do it fr. It takes your personality hostage worse than alcohol does. It makes you believe that you need it to have fun, to be social, to unwind, to wake up, it takes over many aspects of life. It’s not sustainable from a health perspective even if you have the money.

[@pgg-i4c]

yep, alc is my demon and coke just exarcbates it, shoulda done shroooms at cedar point, f coke and alc

[@InBoccaAlLupo333]

After Matt's jokes, I had to listen to the first bit Tony said again because I misheard him the first time and thought his mum called him then put the brothers on the phone... 😂💀

[@Unmaleable]

Had they had some for the morning time you guys would've definitely went to Cedar Point.

[@guanaco103]

I love how the sad music stops after he said we did so much cocaine 😂

[@platinumphazer]

When he means last night he means "we haven't gone to sleep yet"😂😂

[@lordofbhutan5883]

When you say it like that, It makes me wana try cocaine 😂

[@trusttheprocess5618]

I had low expectations but left with a nice laugh

[@XXIIXIIIXXXIXXXIX]

Sold coke and then crack when I was young....good advice 😂 Wrecked my brain.

[@4Mikes4Mindset4]

Doesn't sound like you sold much then

[@bigchumbucket4347]

Yeahhhh

[@Boback111]

Cedar Point was awesome as a kid, Gemini was prob my fav back then. Standing in line on the stairs for water slides at soak-city was easily scarier than any ride at the park imo.

[@brandonadams7123]

Y-Town representing!!

[@Sarah-ch1dp]

Sober for 12 years this past July from those lovey little pills like Sir Novak..Bless that Dawg

[@fishfire_2999]

Tony described the outfit every college kid 80s was wearing while doing coke 😂

[@cesarordaz139]

I pictured the infinity pool in my mind 😂

[@cw6082]

Coke is okay, not great but ok 😂

[@kylecartwright782]

favorite part actually

[@oldschool6232]

I've since given up my bad habits. Drinking alcohol, smokin weed. But when I was I tried coke for about a month. I enjoyed my weed more. Coke would take the buzz away. So I never did coke again. Same with speed and downers. Alcohol was easy to give up as well. For me weed gives me real bad headaches. It's the THC. I also don't drink caffeine or soda. Nasty stuff.

[@figbat6363]

Ceder point? Wheres tony from?

[@ajay.gillig]

I like the image of them with an arm hangin off the infinity pool thinking, this Totally sucks! 😂

[@eyemallears2647]

Best podcast ever

[@ivanflores-ramirez8105]

I’ve never done drugs in any point in my life and for me it’s too late. I have a heart condition but eight months ago I was told by a doctor if I ever do drugs, I would likely die because upset heart condition. Blood pressure could kill me.

[@bobbycorps7891]

I absolutely 💯 ADORE DOPE!!!😊😊😊

[@ansem11]

I always forget cedar point is an amusement park because the town next to mine is cedar point. So when people tell me they’re taking their kids to cedar point I’m like “whyyy???” Lol

[@gabrielramos3385]

What's Cedar Point?

[@RytkösenJussi]

I used couple lines today and its very hard to get that in here.

[@KingKilo88]

Tony: Never Try Cocaine! Me:*sniffing* too late...

[@jackdaniels-u6o]

Real old school comics can do cocaine all night and roast the next day 😂😂😂

[@AlejandroFlores-no4ic]

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just love the smell of it!

[@Leafer99]

That actually sounds like one of those Jack Handy SNL satire commercial skits. Those were the days.😊

[@iamatomiczombie]

A couple of points here. First, cocaine smells AMAZING!!! Secondly, only Uber-gay Tony would regale us with a heartfelt story at the center of which lies every detail of an outfit that he didn’t get the chance to wear out on the town😂

[@benscott7100]

I have never tried coke i dont judge those who do just not for me id rather smoke my weed and thats not for everyone either

[@brodyjames4126]

That’s kinda the same conversation I got as a kid as well lol. It was face to face though. My cousin also looked dead on the inside and didn’t want that for anyone else he liked. I’m glad I’m not the only one.

[@gavenhicks8063]

My mom would have made us go as punishment 😭😂

[@gmajor9913]

This legitimately looks like the first time anyone has told Tony the truth behind that lie😂😂🤣😂

[@stangovation6459]

My older cousin explained to me every reason why not to do every type of drug and when he came to cocaine the only reason he gave me he said “never do cocaine because you will love it too much”

[@knuccs]

Cedar Point in Michigan?

[@ruckus8378]

Instructions unclear I am now a coke addict