Norm MacDonald's Hilarious Rant on Booze, Drugs and Addiction!

[@timothyconnor834]

“What better way to keep a secret than to tell a room full of drunks?” 😂😂😂

[@MerryChristmasx2024x]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@davidcurtis7547]

you have a disease , but probably the best one . The AA jokes are spot on , kind of the opposite of anon.

[@tldrevil2795]

...unless one of them isn't wearing a shirt

[@MrJimithee]

"I like to stretch my drug dollar" The king of perfect word choice

[@steven1479]

Seriously, the way he words things is so hilarious, hard for me to put in my own words!

[@kentkluver6834]

😅​@@steven1479

[@brutallyremastered4255]

"I imagined a nice lady in a dress"

[@grouchygrundle]

Lol

[@seandawson2335]

“If I happen to die in the hallway, stay the hell away from me” is a great punchline.

[@ChristopherJohn4389]

I'll never stop watching Norm

[@bgk7]

I second that!

[@alexdietz911]

I…I don’t think I can

[@aelechko]

Unless you get in a draw with cancer

[@jeffdecker627]

Until I die!

[@EllenDegenerate1]

It’s a lifestyle, really.

[@chimchimchow]

I’m a Normaholic, I’m addicted to Normahol

[@CHodgy]

I also am a Normaholic, its been 3 months and 16 days since my last Norm

[@outerhaven170]

I’m a Normalolic, addicted to Normalol

[@peterdelamothe254]

That’s not normal

[@bassfaceinspace]

of all the diseases, this may be the best one.

[@ghostofnorm420]

​@Chunkieta😂

[@dakotabruce7773]

Can we please all get together and try to bring this man back to life? It was his dying wish!

[@Maximillian-00]

😂😂😂

[@keymaster430]

I thought it was for us to not have sex with his body.

[@thisatticdancer731]

It reminds me of that tragedy

[@keymaster430]

@@thisatticdancer731 ???.....Oh, yeah! When all that stuff happened in New York!

[@thisatticdancer731]

@@keymaster430 I walked through blood and bones

[@nobodiez]

“ what do you like to drink ? ,other than Jizzz” 🤣🤣

[@DuckYou69]

He drinks it under the Queensboro bridge

[@zenmonk5403]

I didn't expect that at all and almost died

[@gordonsmith8870]

☠️☠️☠️

[@BirdOfHermes83]

Norm did know Adam during his days under the Queensboro bridge.

[@dmd1978]

He was telling people he had colon cancer through his jokes. As a colon cancer survivor he describe the exact symptoms that sent me to the hospital before i was diagnosed. RIP norm he remained strong till the end.

[@mkultra2456]

@@check4v MAH NIGGA! OUR LIVES MATTER!

[@NoSpoonsAllowed]

@@check4v no lmfao it was acute leukemia

[@kiro6119]

@@NoSpoonsAllowed stop spreading porky pies, he got struck by a city bus

[@latentsea]

I didn’t even know he was sick

[@mkultra2456]

@@NoSpoonsAllowed Looks like check4v offed himself. His comment is nowhere to be found.

[@ZT5513]

As a recovering alcoholic myself, this actually made me laugh out loud. He describes AA pretty accurately haha

[@dickhitswater4836]

Me too, that part had me laughing so much. Some of the things I’ve heard in meetings just floors me. It’s amazing how many people have killed someone, usually driving accidents while intoxicated, and only serve a few years.

[@zack_iam]

not very anonymous of you…

[@leroygardner8529]

if you go to AA, you were being an alcoholic for attention

[@bongofury333]

Disease = chronic, progressive, fatal. ☠️

[@jimbanda]

​@@zack_iamWhy?? You now recognise the person who made the comment? You can tell who they are, where they go to AA meetings and everybody else that goes??

[@snuckles1]

I never saw that necrophilia bit at the the end. I am dying 😂! And you befter stay the hell away from me if I do!

[@10percent4DaBigGuy]

remember earlier when i said i wasn't better than you people, i am! i am better than you people!

[@markb20]

Nothing like coming across Norm to brighten your day- and laugh hysterically while you're at it. The world is a better place for Norm having been in it.

[@RossRosengren]

Great sentiment. I love how he brought the funny. It certainly brightened my life. One of my heroes

[@Ofcourseitsgonwork]

I love norm because he never flinches, he just keeps building the plot up until there’s almost no punch line, then BOOM the funniest shit ever… and he doesn’t even laugh. Just a menacing smile 🤣🤣

[@kendallmccormick689]

He's so talented that he connected this rant across different years and places!

[@HandsomeDevil456]

The way he tells stories always draws me in.

[@nunyabusiness3920]

My grown daughter got me a Turd Ferguson shirt for my birthday,she knows the deal 😂

[@henrydamassa613]

shes a keeper

[@CannibalOX99]

Can i date her

[@davidwujczyk3037]

That’s awesome 🤣 I can’t wait til my daughters older to show her some norm jokes 😅

[@davidwujczyk3037]

2018 or 19 my now wife got us tickets to go see norm for my birthday, im so grateful to get to see him live I laughed the whole time

[@aliasif8498]

Don't know how many times I have seen these jokes but still enjoy as much as I laughed the first time... N after few weeks or months I m back on Norm Macdonald marathon...no doubt greatest comic of all time

[@greggmclaughlin9047]

I like to stretch my drug dollar. Too funny

[@imoveforward007]

Listening to Norm’s Late Show Appearances make me feel happy

[@johnschoen703]

The best was his final appearance. Its hands down the tightest set ever done in talk show history. In my humble opinion.

[@Mrch33ky]

"And where are all those flashbacks they promised us?" - Hunter S. Thompson

[@sammycaldwell2385]

🤣 Oh God bless you Norm, we're still laughing🥰

[@randyj420]

Absolute GENIUS because he could tackle so many taboo topics and blow 'em up so well and so creatively. Thanks NORM! - for a lifetime of funny I will revisit regularly. Being able to do that long story on Letterman (then many times on Conan) was a huge thing. Break the rules and pull of something only a handful of others have done well.

[@yingyangorca4124]

Norm got me through covid in Australia. This place has gone bat shit crazy.

[@baswenmakers6846]

You guys already had the "summer camps" up and running. That was wild. We only had curfews, like the last time the Germans came for a 5 year holiday in the Netherlands.

[@billhorstkamp98]

America is crazier than anywhere right now. They’re eating the pets of the people who live there.🤣

[@edub9930]

Same here in the US

[@vincevice1398]

Yeah Australia sucks

[@waylonmercy1533]

@@baswenmakers6846imagine spinning quarantine areas for new entries to the country, as similar to a concentration camp. During a global pandemic

[@jeremywarren5748]

"It's true you got a disease, but you got the best one" - Lol legend

[@americanmade4484]

Norm MACdonald as letterman says it, is my all time favorite, I re watch his stand up, and his late show clips, he's one of the best guest's on the Conan show and letterman, and his opening monologue at the espy's is classic norm, he was the type of guy that would say anything, just flat out hilarious. The fact that he never revealed that he was battling cancer fits him so well. He had a bit about a guy that had cancer and that in the end the cancer won, he said it was weird that the last thing they say about the guy is he lost his battle with cancer, so the last thing he did was lose and that they are calling him a loser, ( I definitely didn't do his joke justice but it's funny AF when he tells it) don't worry norm nobody thinks you're a loser, you were a stand up guy and someone that millions of people admired and loved. Thanks for all the laughs you gave us and continue to give me.

[@caulfield618]

Let's be clear here, Norm battled the cancer to a draw.

[@jamesross8612]

I know your comment is a year ago but I agree completely that Norm gave us so many laughs that the world needs more than ever so he is really a hero in our time. Laughter is the remedy of all the ills of the world and I hope all can experience that natural high you get from a good laugh! best wishes to you American made guy...

[@americanmade4484]

@jamesross8612 you got that right. It's really strange when Norm died it really felt like losing someone who I knew or a family member, I think a lot of people who loved norms comedy felt that way. Also the fact that he never told anyone about his "battle with cancer, that he lost at the end, last thing he did was lose" makes that joke even funnier. There's not many people that could have cancer and not say anything about it. He was a Man. A great Man imo.🎤🧏‍♂️,🇺🇲🇨🇦

[@Lopfff]

I too have been bamboozled by big acid. A few hundred times…

[@newusernamehere4772]

Acid is a pyramid scheme, emphasis on pyramid

[@newusernamehere4772]

I love pyramids lol

[@tricialicious1]

Is that why you don't remember how to spell your name, Mike?

[@Lopfff]

@@tricialicious1 Perhaps

[@JamesHadfield-v3t]

Jealous. L.S.D. is the Best! But hard to get due to repressive Old ideology!

[@williamwoodall1293]

The Necrophiacs Anonymous bit at the end I had tears coming from my eyes laughing.

[@claritacooke-xy1qt]

I love him. And I love his comedy about “the disease of alcoholism “ and the non anonymity of Alcoholic’s Anonymously. 😂😂😂

[@aaronschutte7160]

Why the quotes?

[@Gmanawesomeness]

@@aaronschutte7160 Because Norm was playing on the idea of “the disease of alcoholism”?

[@peanutbutterdijonnaise]

@@aaronschutte7160 it’s not worth the arguing in comments. Let the man just appreciate Norm and leave the disease model discussion to more serious content

[@aaronschutte7160]

@@peanutbutterdijonnaise I would have gladly done that if it weren't for the quotes. He used the quotes for a reason, to send a message. He knew exactly what he was doing, and it goes FAR beyond just appreciating Norm. Read between the lines.

[@grindelston5968]

"Haha"

[@KonohazFinest]

Miss you norm and thanks for giving us all a part of you every time you went up on stage we're all forever grateful.

[@RM-ys2rb]

Pure genius, miss you NORM ❤❤

[@Mr25thfret]

That is my favorite stand-up of Norm's. He was killing that night. RIP Norm. ❤

[@asleandere8852]

I first saw Norm's sketch with Necrophyiliac's Anonymous a few years ago. I am still laughing at it

[@WilliamFrederick-e2f]

More of a compilation than a rant, but I dig it non the less. Thank you for the video! RIP Norm.

[@Sickofdrawingcowboys717]

More of a comment really

[@justinl3008]

I didn't even know he was sick

[@matturner6890]

*nonetheless

[@MikeIXWilliams]

Guys a real jerk

[@WilliamFrederick-e2f]

@@matturner6890 whoops lol! Silly me!!! Thank you for the correction. Had it not been "fro yourr! da peeps dat be up pon da ya KZbin maybe not knewr hows about tur speek allz adn rr praughpr likez" Whoops silly me again! I needed to make an edit. I misspelled something. 😐

[@joellamoureux7914]

Love the sarcasm. Nice and thick!

[@13guns87]

Rip to such a naturally funny man. He was so talented. One of the best ever and probably one of the only people who wouldn't in a discussion as one of the best but for comedians. He was very well liked, loved and appreciated by comedians who knew him and those who didnt too. Its cos the man not a comedian. He's naturally gifted at making ppl laugh. Dave chappelle said he tried to get out of working with him cos he lost his dad. He said he cheered him up non stop making him laugh. Comedians know when to turn off, naturally funny ppl can't, it's natural. There addiction is making ppl laugh. Which if your funny can be addictive. Chemicals in the brain.

[@Boxman-GG]

I can listen to norm everyday it will never get old

[@jasonlloyd3335]

Im sure almost all of us have heard all these jokes many times but the genius of Norm is they are as funny the 50th time as they where the first.

[@robshelden4670]

Norm and Dave together is comedy heaven!

[@GiddyForGod]

I prefer Norm and Conan. But really anything with Norm is gonna entertain me lol

[@ggioja]

Crying from laughing Even tho I’ve seen bits fifteen times already. I often listen to Norm when I’m having trouble getting to sleep … it puts things in perspective.

[@archieg8009]

"other than f---in jizzz" 🤣

[@KohPhanganSummer]

Norm is the King. I saw him around 1988 live at Yuk Yuks before he started becoming famous. I didn't realize I was watching the early days of a legend.

[@AdamZurier]

Anyone remember his Canadian flag bit? "It invites burning!" 😂✌️✊️

[@andrewthomas891]

yes I do ! I was 15 years old, stoned, laying on the couch laughing my arse off! stretched my laugh dollar out for 43 years!

[@465marko]

That cocaine thing is hilarious!!! "You're partly right.."

[@josephbowles4995]

I miss Norm he was great No one can compare to his natural comedic genius!

[@brotherpaul963]

@Joseph Bowles he appeared to be a cross between Letterman and Newman.

[@zemaria566]

and the worst part is that we will never know where he got his ideas for the jokes

[@justinl3008]

I didn't even know he was sick

[@BirdOfHermes83]

I bet his dog house was glorious!

[@GalactusOG]

one of the best ever. Period.

[@Alan-v8r]

"Y'all keep your hands to yourself!"😂

[@HRWelch]

I never saw that last sketch before. LMFAO

[@stephenluster2571]

Please Please, Lotd above, let my memory fade just enough that I never run out of fresh Norm McDonald comedy, even at the expense of losing my Buddhist depth of cool.

[@randyw.9916]

Norm could say the most fucked up stuff and still get a laugh. 😂

[@watersauce3998]

Reminds me of that national tragedy XD

[@ghostofnorm420]

​@@watersauce3998911 ? 😂😂😂

[@jbug1979]

he couldn't tell if the blood was from his knuckles or his newborn son's skull 😅😂

[@derekmoloney2619]

His stand up skit on alcoholism is one of the best stand up routines ever,so funny.

[@FarooqKhan-jz7vb]

Omg I had to stop the video I was laughing so uncontrollably 😂

[@4SteveKombolis]

Norm had said a few times he was afraid to die. Of course nobody knew at the time what he was going through. I'd imagine those last days were tough. I hope he knew how much joy he gave others

[@larry-om9tg]

Norm had the greatest sense of humor.

[@kenburke9920]

I always thought that Norm was the funniest anchor on Weekend Update on SNL, right up there with Chevy Chase. RIP Norm. We miss you!

[@TheElephantRoom1]

The ending clip on this is fantastic!!

[@youdesklamp]

Love how happy Norm is when he gets to pretend to be offended by something Dave Letterman said

[@davidwujczyk3037]

The letterman rehab joke is the best joke to ever get on late night

[@River_of_Revenge]

The best comedian to ever grace this foul world.

[@BenevolentBees]

his punchline delivery is so so good

[@kelseyseeker4940]

We all miss you Norm.

[@user-mp5gc1vc6d]

The dog had some gin, what ya gonna do. Lol

[@wildzeromusic]

It never ceases to satisfy just how much giggling Norm could get out of Dave, Conan, and basically everyone.

[@ddavidone6538]

My two favorite comedians of all time: Norm and Mitch. RIP

[@SDW90808]

Good Lord, we need Norm today more than ever.

[@derekk2732]

That opening joke is well crafted

[@theanc316ientone]

20 minute story jokes, love it.

[@steviechampagne]

so sad to hear him describe the bowel pains. he is clearly speaking from experience. man he must have suffered so much in total silence while making the whole world laugh. Norm was an enlightened being, he did his job well.

[@davidpinette9656]

Acute leukemia buddy... or so the germans would have us believe

[@JosephScott-ct9sw]

No, stomach cancer in the '80s

[@davidpinette9656]

@@JosephScott-ct9sw 🏅

[@JD-jc8gp]

he had screeching, searing, ripping pains

[@ghostofnorm420]

Please stop with the cancer talk. It reminds me of that tragedy

[@WatchMePlayTheGames]

I left mid way into the bearded guy hotel gag and came back to the rest of the bit! great work!

[@danboke5796]

How the hell did he rant on the same topic for 8 minutes? That's gotta be the longest I've seen a comedian stay on topic. That was incredible.

[@Sickofdrawingcowboys717]

Never seen that Letterman that was absolutely amazing!

[@tattiepeelneil7658]

Nobody can do what norm did. Genius 😂

[@vincenzobonadonna4556]

I first encountered Norm as the genie from Fairly Odd Parents.

[@tristanmccleery9889]

That jingoist clip is one of my all time favorites

[@54WMD]

Norm was great in the NA meeting. So serious and believable. Could have been great in the right dramatic role.

[@BennieTarrMusic]

Hell yeah smoke crack.

[@lloydclaussen3925]

He was in a dramatic role in Dirty Work with Artie

[@54WMD]

@@lloydclaussen3925 thanks much

[@Bonez0r]

I have a bit of a problem and I go to NA meetings myself, only it's Normaholics Anonymous.

[@crungefactory]

We're all addicted to Normahol

[@markeggins890]

In his offhand way every word is chosen with absolute precision for maximum comic effect.

[@bangs8560]

Wild that Letterman said Mayo Clinic

[@AwayFromTheWorld]

Great collection. Thank you for sharing!

[@immatthewvega4709]

The last skit has me crying man that was so funny lmao

[@milfordjohnson2289]

haha i like this dude. why dont we have dry comedy like this in australia this is not very fair!

[@MrAntoniorey]

He was genius. I’m in pain from laughing so hard

[@soyboy2238]

Laughter is the best medicine and Norm is my pharmacist.

[@flytrapYTP]

I didn't even know he was sick

[@Ironcross6669]

Did the sober driving just get some trim!😂😂😂 yup😅

[@pablodebella7695]

The joke he has about suicid#$ is just genius

[@CoolDaysEnd]

sheer brilliance.

[@Stalagmize]

15:49 😂😭💀 Keep your hands to yourselves!

[@bonim5180]

I could never understand why you would get so low, you have no shoes! 😂 this seems self explanetory! 🤣

[@phamilypharms9336]

3:30 , we find out now he was the Uncle , and his stomach cancer was likely the fuel for that 'joke' about searing stomach pain 😢 Norm you are a LEGEND 💯

[@aaronlohr8477]

Must have felt good to get that out in the air, relieving even.

[@SKa-tt9nm]

By that “logic”, he must have really met those 2 midgets in Vegas, he must have really given a live tortoise to a drunken patron while he was a bar tender and he must have had Andy richter buy him breakfast with money Andy earned being a male escort.

[@tz4637]

All these years - Norm was Uncle Burt RIP - we didn’t even know you were sick.

[@therainman7777]

Norm died from leukemia, not bowel cancer.

[@johnnydelgrady]

Norm will always be the king.

[@timmyjimmyshimmywhimmy]

I battled heroin addiction for awhile and sometimes I refer to my addiction as "what a jib that turned out to be" . Thank you Norm lmao

[@BabyZacc]

1:48 the fact he said that to John Travolta makes it 10x funnier

[@kevinbeattie7297]

Asking Adam who is sober what drink he likes lol 😅

[@bramiwami]

Just noticed that Uncle Burt was Norm himself...

[@therainman7777]

Norm died from leukemia, not bowel cancer.

[@digdugbingo]

I remember seeing SNL when Norm said "fuck" live on the air. Immediately after he caught himself and said, "In this weeks news SNL comedian Norm Macdonald fired this week for cursing live on television". Oh man, one of tv's greatest moments.

[@fizzled1]

The look of disdain in Uncle Ex's eyes when he recalls how louies dad killed his horse is palpable

[@JohnnysChingaderas]

The beating the newborn son alcoholics joke fucken kills me evertime Ritchie K 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@rogerthat309]

Ahh don't take a wild swing at me while im not looking!

[@edwardcatton1047]

Went through a few tissues just then!, Hilarious!, R.I.P Norm!, miss ya SNL Updates!.

[@archaicsoul4597]

Ending on a borderline non sequitur was very Norm. 10/10

[@aiocein4794]

Great to see Norm doing more stuff

[@DeadbeatGodfather]

What are your symptoms? Well I get happy. 😂😂 as a booze bag myself, that’s fuckin hilarious