Let's Talk About Cheating

[@SillyLittleGooberGuy]

I cheated on my boyfriend back in elementary school… I married another boy because I forgot I was dating him 😔

[@lemons8380]

🙄🙄wow dude

[@notevenemily]

LMAOO

[@chantellemodisane]

😂😂😂

[@pikasisy_oi5530]

All elementary school relationships tbh 😭😂

[@MultiArtStyleTWT]

@viktordeadboi Crack. You were on crack. LMAOO

[@Cinnamonraisin_Bagel]

Not cheating on your partner is really easy, i don't get how people struggle to do this, if you cheat on your partner you are lame

[@coolchameleon21]

fr. i’ve never cheated in any relationship i’ve ever been in. it’s very easy

[@Ren-jh3xb]

literally I don't get why it's so hard for people to just break up before they go to someone else. if you're that tired of your partner then it shouldn't be that much of a hassle. otherwise just thug it out or communicate if you're not sure whether you still want them or not. it drives me up a wall so bad to see people take the most cowardly and selfish route in a relationship and try to paint it as cool and empowering

[@Cinnamonraisin_Bagel]

@@Ren-jh3xb Yeah if you stop feeling feelings for your partner end the relationship or communicate (both are valid don't force yourself to stay with someone you hate)

[@Cinnamonraisin_Bagel]

@@coolchameleon21 Yeah like it's pretty easy like people don't have any excuses to cheat

[@lizzie8026]

yeah they have got to have... issues. Maybe sex addiction(ik its debated on but if you dont have some type of compulsiveness at least towards sex you wouldn't cheat), or narcissism or something. Like there's something wrong w them bc its not that hard to just be loyal

[@sunnivawestermann]

I think it’s absolutely insane how I’ve witnessed more than one girl brag about winning back her cheating boyfriend after he almost left her for the other woman, making it seem like some sort of power move. Like girl, the trash took itself out and you took it back in

[@Aurora_Celeste_ASMR]

I informed my ex's then gf about the cheating and she basically told me I was just jealous lol.

[@vergilated9829]

​@@Aurora_Celeste_ASMRdude wtf

[@vixithespiderling]

@@Aurora_Celeste_ASMRthat’s wild 💀

[@glittersnail3499]

FRRRR

[@zellalaing5439]

Oh no, i feel for your friends, thats not a prize, or more, consolation prize because the second girl got bored/got out of manipulation.

[@cheshta8404]

Cheating can never be on accident because you made the choice to do it

[@SkyXIII]

Well, except if it's rape. For example a girl putting something on a guys drink, getting him to her house/hotel and then have sex without his sober consent

[@leuanasantos1288]

​@@SkyXIII then it's not cheating, it's rape. Pretty sure the comment was not talking about that.

[@abigaylekitchen]

@@SkyXIIIdude that’s not cheating. 💀 if you don’t consent it’s not cheating and if anyone thinks that it is they’re dumb.

[@SkyXIII]

@@leuanasantos1288 right 👍

[@SkyXIII]

@@abigaylekitchen absolutely agree 👍

[@crazyaboutkat3460]

As someone who's been cheated on, I agree with Emily that I don't think you can really love someone and cheat on them.

[@SkyXIII]

What if you get drunk? Then you lose control and aren't thinking clearly

[@abigaylekitchen]

@@SkyXIIIthat’s not an excuse. It doesn’t hold up, that’s like saying “I was drunk driving, because I was drunk. I couldn’t think clearly enough to not get behind the wheel” 💀💀

[@Enma.Junior]

​@@SkyXIIIBeing drunk doesn't make a succubus take over your body or sum 😭🙏

[@SkyXIII]

@@abigaylekitchen yes, it's wrong but it happens and it's true that people lose their critical thinking ability when drunk. One could claim that I didn't consent when I cheated because I was drunk and unable to consent

[@SkyXIII]

@@Enma.Junior It does in a sense

[@friendlyneighborhoodloser2639]

reminder to anyone who’s been cheated on that it has nothing to do with you not being good enough. it’s just them being a bad person

[@USSAnimeNCC-]

Yeah it like having a guy drive across a train when a train is coming and turn into scrap metal it all his choice to not be where he shouldn't have been

[@Maplebear1203]

​@@USSAnimeNCC-trains are very loud You know when they're coming You don't accidentally roll on to train tracks unless your brakes are broken so yes it is his fault for being somewhere he shouldn't be

[@abunchofsmallaliens7250]

Thank you Garfield

[@kingarthur1295]

That’s not true, I use to think that but I got older. I’ve notice when women cheat on men it’s almost ALWAY the guys fault bcuz that means he’s lacking in some area or maybe he is terrible in the bedroom. Either way if u as a guy can fill all of a woman’s boxes on her checklist 99% she won’t cheat. As for men. Men cheat bcuz they can’t control urges that’s not on the girl. But if ur a guy and u got cheated on it’s entirely ur fault

[@koripeterson7310]

​@kingarthur1295 no the cheater needs to communicate there issues. 2 wrongs don't make a right. The cheater had the option to speak to their partner or leave if the relationship is bad. They chose to cheat instead of leaving.

[@stevencruz978]

Reminder to NOT take back the person who cheated once. No matter how many books they text you about how much they've changed

[@temposhop8739]

It can also change the way you look at the world. My friends gaslighted themselves into believing everyone cheats/gets cheated on, so people who hold their partner to a higher standard are "unrealistic."

[@Um_mY_nAmE_is_AleX]

Fr

[@YukaAkemi]

my motto is : once a cheater always a cheater, they only feel bad bc they were caught and not even for the cheating part, the way their mind and morals are in their brains to cheat even once will stay with them unless they rly rly do a lot of introspection and want to change, they are inclined to lie and hide

[@alessandradatanasio4568]

AMEN

[@bex6638]

Except there are some circumstances where shitty people do change, and want to change for themselves too. JS

[@Jitterbug_8]

Cheating is like that one kid who always says “It’s not my fault!” When they literally punched a child or smthn

[@-_cat_-_paws-_]

I love your pfp

[@Jitterbug_8]

@@-_cat_-_paws-_ Tysm!!

[@aesthethicc69420]

Fitting that your pfp is Octavia 💀

[@Jitterbug_8]

@@aesthethicc69420 wdym?

[@anneliesejackson507]

That's not the same though. Sometimes it's for self defense

[@Bugganox]

Respect for the girlies who unknowingly get in a relationship with a taken man, and when they learn they are the other woman inform the wife of the ex. Big w

[@gracen8010]

Fr I’ll never understand people who find out they’re being cheated on/are the other partner and get mad at the other person being cheated on instead of the one doing the cheating. Like y’all have the same enemy, it’s time to team up.

[@cheesepuff2]

Im afraid to tell the “ex” because I think she knows or they have an open relationship

[@-caspo-]

And also to the guys who do the same if they find out that a girl is cheating with them.

[@mebozabi8830]

@@cheesepuff2tbh most likely neither of those instances are true

[@an-me]

@@cheesepuff2It’s literally best to just tell her.

[@britneybij3997]

I can't even get any play on purpose, how the fuck do you do that shit on accident?!?

[@Cinnamonraisin_Bagel]

You trip over and accidentally go to the bar and slip on a banana peel which leads to you flirting with the bartender behind your partners back /j

[@nicjoy4407]

⁠​⁠@@Cinnamonraisin_BagelHappens to the best of us, I feel really bad for people that accidentally do all this, they are really the true victims. Like the banana peel epidemic only targets the best people.

[@moonshinershonor202]

It's because those who are partnered up cheat with others who are partnered up. 😅

[@Cinnamonraisin_Bagel]

@@nicjoy4407 Yeah 😔 when banana peels are dropped on the floor i always end up in whacky situations simply tragic

[@Flesh_Wizard]

​@@nicjoy4407there's definitely a supervillain placing cheater banana peels everywhere

[@hachuu2571]

My best friend‘s boyfriend of 3 years cheated on her, because “she cheated first.” How did she cheat, you’re asking? Her little brother got into a severe car crash, so she had to rush to the hospital and it didn’t cross her mind to let the boyfriend know where she was at. Yup, that’s all it took for him to find the next best girl and carry out his revenge, since “not disclosing your whereabouts 24/7 in a relationship is considered cheating.” He went on to tell all of their mutual friends his side of the story, just conveniently left out the part where he took revenge AND the actual, supposed act of her cheating…

[@meponenlassillas8464]

i'm no therapist and i'm going to use the word lightly, but that's narcissistic behavior. telling your side of the story to everyone first, making sure they won't believe the other person AND withholding information? yeah, your best friend won here. wake up, break up and dont look back. he would've done it sooner or later

[@MySchoolProject15]

Please tell me she kicked him to the curb.

[@DevoidVoid]

​@@meponenlassillas8464 except for the fact it works. You're entirely life, reputation and ability to even trust is ruined, so like might aswell just not even exist anymore lmao

[@SonotmickeY3626]

even if she had cheated,cheating on them even after makes you a cheater,obviously and it makes you as disgusting as the one who did it first.

[@lilo2373]

He just used that as an excuse to end the relationship

[@soop3202]

i was cheated on and he told friends “it was a mistake, i feel so awful, she can never find out.” so of course he continued to cheat for months because the other girl was “manipulating him” and he loved me too much to tell me the truth.

[@miguelpadeiro762]

What a hack, if you love someone you come clean and face the consequences of your actions. Im sorry you went through that

[@sheena8269]

Sounds more like possession. He still wanted access to you while he did it with another girl.

[@TheOriginalNay.]

Why is this so common? I've had five different friends tell me the same story..

[@GrapeFlavoredStudios]

@@TheOriginalNay. You need new friends cuz that's insane, it's not that common (in good people).

[@Meepmeepmeepmeep-]

Cheating is mid being loyal to a partner is where the alpha enegry is at ✨

[@Binchanareangels]

Oooh Ate

[@coolchameleon21]

real sigmas are loyal and loving partners

[@demigreen6495]

U need to use commas, i had to read that over like 5 times

[@Gracklepop]

@@demigreen6495you’re in a KZbin comment section, you’re asking way too much

[@Enma.Junior]

​@@demigreen6495If your brain cant fill out commas on such small comments, you might just be slow

[@lex.4092]

it's disgusting how normalized cheating has became

[@alukardio6991]

It was always normalized. It just became more public and a symbol of power and strength unfortunately..

[@adeleisrllycool_16]

reall my friend has like 6 different boyfriends and they’re contact names are like bf #4 and bf #5 😭

[@swtmm]

@@adeleisrllycool_16and your friends with them still?

[@ecnoi]

@@adeleisrllycool_16 and shes still ur friend?? 😭

[@morbidsearch]

Was definitely much more normalised 10-20 years ago if TV sitcoms are any indication

[@Apostate_Alexei]

I love it when a cheater says "it meant nothing to me!" Like, oh ok cool. So you completely betrayed me and irreparably broke the trust in our relationship for something that meant "nothing" to you? Dope.

[@MYLAR.]

YEAH! like that’s just inadvertently saying “you were nothing to me, but I couldn’t say it with my chest”

[@BlazingKhioneus]

@@MYLAR.less than nothing. Nothing was more valuable.

[@LeanChuleta]

Yeah cheating is always going to end a relationship for me. I don’t care how long we’ve been together and I don’t care what your excuse is, I’m leaving you. Whether we were together 10 years or 10 months and I don’t care how long ago it was as soon as I find out, I’m breaking up with you, no fighting, no questions, you will never see me again. Why would I stay when there’s plenty of men out there who don’t cheat, I’ll go be with one of them instead. ❤

[@cookie_327]

@@LeanChuleta Same for me. There's no coming back from that.

[@coolchameleon21]

@@LeanChuleta yep. the trust was broken and it will never be the same.

[@PossibleBat]

Sadly, for me it’s the wasted years. Men do this all the time where they use you during your best years only to cheat on you with someone younger. It’s such treason… this is why I don’t encourage women to be in long term relationships past the 2 first years of there’s no sign of a deeper commitment from your partner, let that be marriage, living together, future family plans, whatever. If your partner isn’t willing to invest on you for the future, that relationship is done.

[@spongebob1369]

​@@PossibleBatif your man was like this, that doesn't mean all the men are the same

[@ms.tinygiant]

Amen.

[@johannaelloso9418]

Cheating being normalized means the bar is in fucking hell. It's literally not that fucking hard to stay loyal hello??? Do these people even *like* their partner at all?? This isn't even a debatable topic like what

[@stuffystuffsityas6302]

In our current social climate the view of relationships seem to be crumbling. It’s no longer a dedicated love you continue to build with great effort for the person you admire and adore most, but more of a “they’re good enough, I’ll complain about them a lot and my eyes will keep wandering but this is easy and they’re fun enough so whatever”. Some people want to find The One, and others aren’t interested in that at all. Makes it hard out here.

[@KreeZafi]

As a matter of fact I think that no, a lot of people do in fact not even like their partner. We may be finally starting to outgrow the boomer "I hate my wife" humor, but sadly the fact remains that a lot of people are in relationships where they don't actually love their partner.

[@Manwith6secondmemory]

The bar for emotional/behavioral standards is very low. But the initial bar, the bar for physical/attraction standards is very very very very high and glossed over in this discussion

[@mm5xo]

with the trend of hookup culture and dating apps/social media making it seem like u have so many options... it's sad that it's kinda normalized now

[@NicholasMusick]

its so normalized they've even tried to turn into a positive thing, now not wanting people to cheat is possessive LOL

[@someonee798]

“out of the blue… and into the pink” GOT ME 😭😭😭

[@punkinpiezz]

Some cheaters are literally pure evil and you can't convince me otherwise , an ex of mine said and I quote "talking to my ex reminds me why I cheated on her." Which is such disgusting behavior and a horrible thing to say

[@Jaquantavius_johnson_III]

Whatchu mean “some”?

[@derKosmoprolet369]

@@punkinpiezz I call it 'Honesty '!

[@jaiweenie]

Absolutely wild thing to say fr. And to you, his new, current (at the time) partner??? Crazy

[@kylesmith9598]

@@Jaquantavius_johnson_IIII have a friend who cheated on his girl 6 years ago, he made a very bad decision, they broke up. However from that time since he has grown up and become one of the most stand up guys I know, people can change…not all cheaters are “pure” evil

[@DevoidVoid]

I think Ted Bundy was born out of being cheated on not even lying, like his victims looked like the woman that he built his entire life up to date again years later and then he dumped her in revenge. It's so obvious how much betrayal trauma effects the psyche, especially lonely and vulnerable crowds

[@Sanguine-Tenshi]

I think the thing with Ned is that he broke character. He was the "My wife" try guy, he always talked about his wife, about their marriage, about how awesome she was, about how much he loved her. And then it came out that he cheated on her. So it legit is just breaking character. He was presenting himself as someone who loved his wife while actively cheating on her.

[@audreydoyle5268]

He was overcompensating. Portraying a character, not his true character. Like Mattie Westbrooke cheating on Bella Avila. I knew something was up, tried to warn everyone in Bella's comments that Mattie was being shady by love bombing them, and everyone thought I was crazy or jealousy. Or both. I was confirmed right after a couple months. I have a knack for picking up on who's gonna screw it up in a relationship. Ned gave me very strong fake nice, lame husband vibes.

[@amirarosemarie1578]

That’s high key almost exactly how my husband is (he cheated 🤪)

[@urarakasupremecist5671]

his fan base also grew to love his wife. It's like seeing someone you like get played in real time.

[@meg7444]

See, the Ned Fulmer scandal was so huge (more than the usual cheating scandals) was because not only was he the 'my wife' try guy -- the man was profiting off his relationship with her. He was making cookbooks, figurines , podcasts and using his wife and kids like props. Every time he said "my wife", he was over compensating and cashing in. All for him to cheat on her over the course of YEARS with his employee. It was exploitative and disgusting, I wish his wife and children the world of healing.

[@Flesh_Wizard]

*Borat voice* "My wife..."

[@garbagecan1940]

the one thing i don't like that people say when these things happen is "they're so pretty/handsome/famous/successful how could anyone cheat on them?" as if people who aren't those things somehow deserve to be cheated on or it would be understandable to cheat on someone who is ugly/poor/unsuccessful

[@cannedcan9788]

OMG it irks me sooo much too, like cheating on the most conventionally unattractive person on this world is NOT more understandable than cheating on the most conventionally attractive person on this world.

[@mochacup1868]

Oh I hate this because according to that logic true love and sincere relationships are not possible for 'common' people Anyway when you are with someone you're supposed to both admired the other, you're supposed to find each other successful or pretty orbrave, kind or genuine or hot etc.

[@arinyahorus45]

I hate this so much. I’ve also seen men online try to defend other men who are exposed for infidelity by saying the female partner must not have been that great. Or, she’s gotten less attractive so it’s understandable. Relationships and true love are not based on appearance. Attraction can start that way but in real love, you’re attracted to the person once you get to know them, not their body or face. Relationships built on looks don’t last because looks change over time. So no one should talk about how someone who’s attractive shouldn’t have been cheated on. NO ONE should be cheated on.

[@risingrat5491]

It’s because cheaters explain their cheating with “you’re not attractive/ successful/ fun/ sexualy active as much anymore for as long as humanity exists… like.. people still say it’s your fault for being cheated on cos of all the above🤷🏻‍♀️ “maybe you’re not good wife to him, that’s why he is talking to other women” is what I was told. I don’t believe it, but it stays in my heart like a bloody thorn.

[@_kenn]

people that “cheat back” confuse me. like are you really staying with them just to cheat? they clearly don’t care abt you or y’all’s relationship.

[@klutzykaya6439]

yes omg no one talks about this? if anything take your revenge/villain arc after you get the fuck away from the cheater??? it's not going to hurt them it is only going to give them justification or hurt you or even the person you're cheating on them with. not worth, if you're craving pettiness get in touch with their mistress instead lmao

[@emishere]

i just responded with a comment of my own to this video, but this is essentially what i did. i cheated on him after he cheated on me, and i then ended the relationship a couple days later. all i can say is that i sad and maybe wanted to reclaim some kind of highground?? still working through it all and trying to understand the psychological aspects of it all, but it's def confusing

[@randomusername3873]

​@@klutzykaya6439nothing wrong with revenge thou

[@Belle-zq3xc]

Breaking your own integrity just to fuck with them lol don't spend that energy

[@dahliacheung6020]

This reminds me of my second boyfriend, the one I lost my virginity to, who I broke up with before I went to college. Very. Clearly. Broke up with. Somehow that didn't get through his head I guess because we were still friends but to him that means we were still together I guess. So I went to college and started seeing someone else. Me and that guy broke up so over Christmas break I hung out with my ex and we went to a new years party together. As. Friends. This girl was there and I noticed she seemed to be into him. So I asked him if he liked her, kind of hoping that he did because I could sense he still was a little too attached to me. This resulted in an, "omg I have a confession to make. I slept with her so I could show you what it's like to be cheated in. Please don't leave me!" I was so very confused.

[@keomeow1936]

Cheating is a CHOICE. If you want to see other people break up.

[@frankiebabieee]

Found out last night that my husband’s been cheating for the last year and a half. He moved out this morning. I’m dead inside.

[@Mindylovealfaro]

I’m so sorry, but as it goes, when one door closes another opens. This is fate

[@samclayton628]

How are you doing today?

[@Antonio-f8d]

It really is one day at a time with things like that. You just have to know it’ll always get better if you’re already in a bit of a valley in life.

[@Boy_in_the_night]

I hope you're feeling at least somewhat better now. Can't say I know what that feels like exactly, but having had some of my own romantic issues lately I do relate to the feeling of hollowness.. my support goes out to you! ✌️

[@marijnborrenbergs8695]

I'm a child to parents that divorced when I was 5. Trust me, as much as you feel like you're losing the person you love most, please know that by cheating thay've shown that they ultimately don't care for the promise of a relationship. If you'd not found out, he would have still cheated. So at least take a modicum of comfort in knowing he can't betray you anymore. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. I honestly don't know how my father was able to push through being cheated on, but he was a kind father to me and my brother, even through all that hollowness. I can only suggest that you cry your heart and soul out with your friends, so you can have a little breathing room to deal with this mentally. All the best in these dark times🙏🏼

[@pixcaine]

this is crazy bc my first partner literally cheated on me w my bsf at the time, i broke up w him, they started dating, she broke up w him, then he came back to me saying how it was all a mistake and he was thinking of me the whole time like… oh it was rough😭 the type of psychological torture i wouldn’t wish on anyone fr. this was 3 years ago now and i still haven’t mentally recovered💗

[@DelilahHasIssues]

Sending all love your way 💞

[@OpressedGamer]

Bruh moment

[@standingappa1160]

Hope you didn't take him back. Once a cheater always a cheater

[@Flesh_Wizard]

What a snake. Glad you're out of it 😊

[@klutzykaya6439]

what a freak! I hope you're doing okay!

[@karlashrn]

my ex would often say "don't leave me" "please don't get bored of me" even though we were in a pretty stable relationship... only to cheat on me in our 4th year together. but he had the audacity to want to stay friends with me. i blocked him on everything, cut him out for good. being cheated on completely damaged my self-esteem and made me question myself and our relationship. and i have trust issues now. it's been a year since we broke up and i'm still going through depression now

[@eqbalraihan7542]

same thing happen to me 😭😭,and my relationship were last a year

[@TPHimbo]

Same for me from the other side. My wife cheated on me after five years or so of marriage. Trying to work through it, but I legit feel like a lost a decade off my life.

[@mr.cranker8086]

I haven’t been cheated on yet, but I know what that feels like to be have your whole world rocked because one person did not love you right and did you wrong. And I’m still going through depression but I hope that we as broken individuals can heal and move on

[@Belle-zq3xc]

I feel you. I think I'm mostly recovered from it now, focusing on my own integrity and lack of theirs but it takes time to rebuild yourself. I hope you seek out people who care about you, especially in non romantic ways

[@sanna9062]

Just know that it wasn't your fault. You couldn't have done anything differently. The fact that he cheated says nothing about you as a person.

[@marinacroy1338]

Im glad you mentioned what people consider "cheating" varies wildly now. I think having a convo with your partner about what you consider cheating is really important early on in the relationship. If you're both open and honest from the beginning, it will save you so much trouble later on.

[@snusnu39]

Something life experience has taught me is that too many of assume we know what other people, think, feel and want, rather than asking them and then assessing if we belive they are giving us accurate information (they might not be lying, they may just lack self awareness). Open communication IME is rare.

[@RatzUnited1]

its also disgusting how people now think its "queen energy" or something like that and use excuses like "im just keeping mu options open

[@cookie_327]

Keeping your options open only works when you're not dating and just talking to someone. The moment it's official those other people should be cut off.

[@klutzykaya6439]

literally! like fuck do you mean "keeping your options open" acting like it's a job or something? they're basically setting the precedent that they already expect their current relationship to fail which is WILD! what was even the point of getting into one then????

[@JohnM0rris]

​@cookie_327 Even that doesn't work if you're taking yourself serious and respecting the person you actually want to go out with. Keeping your options open is so dehumanizing

[@jaiweenie]

​@@cookie_327 yeah like if the person you're talking to knows you're still talking to others and they're ok with it, and even THEY'RE still talking to other people, then it's fine, neither of you have said it's exclusive yet. But once it is, those other people go bye bye, on both ends.

[@paradox9369]

To add on top of this, it helps people who might hyperfixate or obsess over a person. So maybe talking to 2 or 3 people at the same time to see how things are going is helping said person to avoid obsessing/being super infatuated to the point of being blind. ​@@jaiweenie

[@JayfeTher6578]

dude being cheated on would ruin my self confidence so bad omg 😭

[@AshleyBaxter-m6c]

Cheating rarely has anything to do with the person that's being cheated on.

[@Hanz_124]

same man it would rlly suck....

[@JayfeTher6578]

@@AshleyBaxter-m6c yeah im aware but like what Emily said, itd give me the thoughts of “whats wrong with me, am i not good enough, what did i do wrong” act

[@wowwhatausername3703]

ADA PFP also i agree 😭

[@angelicaperez9704]

Believe or not, it's not in the way you think. Its almost like you feel so stupid, and blind, cause you refused to see the signs. It's usually not a fun experience, it has nothing to with you and mostly them. It's very noticeable.

[@marsoulini]

My dad’s excuse for cheating on my mom was “Taking those pills his doctor prescribed for him”. Neither me or my mom believed him, there’s no such side effect that causes you to cheat on your partner 😭

[@misledpoet]

@marsoulini Google the Requip lawsuit. It can happen. Not saying it's the case in your situation at all, but it's an actual possibility.

[@selrox879]

Accountability its a man kriptonite 😂

[@Hppjohg]

My husband blames my birth control, bruh 😤

[@b74hblah]

it sucks when you realize once a person cheats statistically their bound to do it again and you can’t “fix them” like most people think they have to

[@mikebane2866]

That’s not necessarily true. Sometimes life happens and people made poor choices, maybe it’s a depressive episode, maybe a moment of intoxicated weakness and the perfect circumstances arose, it is not okay but we should be realistic about reasons people cheat. It’s not always because they’re a terrible person or a sex fiend who needs multiple partners.

[@srvr2314]

@@mikebane2866I agree, well said.

[@HazooToo]

Realistically, though, you can never really completely trust that person to not cheat again. You simply cannot. "Depressive episode?" Those can happen again. "Moment of weakness and perfect circumstances?" Again, repeatable. I can't think of a single realistic reason (not excuse, because there aren't any) for cheating that can never happen again in a person's life. Whether you feel like you can rebuild the trust you had before enough to continue the relationship is up to you, but it can never, NEVER be rebuilt to the same level it was before. A weakness has been revealed in that person, and if they do it once, they're more likely to do it again. That's as realistic as the reasons you're thinking of. Someone who has one depressive episode is more likely to have another, regardless of whether they cheated during it. Someone who cheated because they felt unappreciated or insecure is more likely to feel that way again, and react the same way. You can't fix that in someone else.

[@plutoh9958]

Uhh, not sure where you got your 'statistics' from but I heartily disagree. Maybe you're talking about cheating in a relationship with person 'A', nothing in the relationship changes except the two people trust each other less and are less motivated to work on their problems and as a result you are more likely to cheat again on person 'A'? It doesn't mean you're going to cheat if you're in a different relationship. What was the cause of the cheating. People don't usually cheat just because someone's super hot.

[@MySchoolProject15]

People can change, but only if they want to. Someone who's done wrong isn't doomed to do it again, but they obviously got to a point where they screwed up because either 1.) they didn't care, or 2.) they let themselves go down a bad path and lied to themselves about how close they could get to the edge before falling off. In my religion we have a concept called "the near occasion of sin," i.e. situations where someone knows they're likely to screw up because they've screwed up there in the past. If they can identify those situations and actually commit to avoiding them and to healing whatever was in them that made them want to cheat in the first place, they can keep themself from doing wrong in the future. But that only works if they recognize that they're a messed up person who needs help and who needs to change. A lot of cheaters might feel guilty but aren't willing to confront the fact that they've got something broken in them that needs fixing.

[@that_Nat08]

Evreyone always talks about being cheated on which really sucks and I have experienced it but I've also experienced the other side of being cheated on WITH. I had no idea that the guy that was flirting and love bombing me had a gf the whole time. (Me and her are besties now)

[@johannaelloso9418]

Being besties with the guy's (now ex) gf is the REAL queen shit ‼️

[@that_Nat08]

@@johannaelloso9418 💅💅

[@Mar_Selcouth]

I so cool you are besties now

[@DianeLice]

Honestly slay🫶

[@hantuus]

​@@johannaelloso9418FR he always made her sound so bad and its the nicest girl in existence

[@michael-cw7nx]

My dad was a serial cheater, he didn't believe in monogamy and yet he constantly complained that woke people were trying to destroy the nuclear family

[@b19wing]

What kinda nuclear family is as he thinking of lol Double standards much??? That’s awful I’m so sorry

[@Falcodrin]

​@@b19wingthe classic nuclear family of husband, wife, 2 kids, and 6 sidepieces in the closet.

[@Alex.The.Lionnnnn]

My mum told me that my dad told her on their wedding night "marriage is just the bread and butter in life and I'll take any bit of jam I can get on the side". To make it even better, she was 21, he was 28.

[@michael-cw7nx]

@@Alex.The.Lionnnnn eww! that's gross. my dad was 30 and my mom was 20, they had me and my brother when she was 21 and 23

[@user-br3ty9rt1m]

Agree. Cheating is never a mistake. It’s a conscious decision that could’ve been stopped at any point but wasn’t because of a person’s own selfish desires.

[@rainbowsnsunshineverywhereigo]

At that, there are typically SO. MANY. STEPS. it takes leading up to cheat and then to literally go and cheat. No way on this planet could it ever be a mistake.

[@KeylahJooste-gj8rs]

Speaking from experience, people don't talk enough about how traumatizing finding out that someone cheated on you is. When I found out, I had a panic attack. Thanks for the trust issues, Elliot. Can't believe I ever gave a man that wanted reassurance about how normal his fetishes are whilst I'm in a packed car with my family, on a road trip, a chance.

[@rainbowsnsunshineverywhereigo]

Yesss no one talks about that crap especially not the ptsd you can develop post discovering. The nightmares, the flinching and panicking at any notifications or missed call or lack of reply rushing straight to flooding or being scared what dumb stuff will happen if alcohol is consumed or developing rage sadness and contempt that you want nothing to do with, intrusive pics of who and what you saw and flashbacks of during and aftermath, the shattered and swayed self worth and self image filled with comparisons to an unattainable reality and so much more is just so traumatizing. I’m sure you likely too know the feeling of the body shaking to the core the hands and eyes and stomach and breath shaking so out of control that you can barely use them. The nausea and vomiting. The teeth chattering. The throat closing up. The chills and hot flashes. Thanks for the trust issues, John! Can’t believe I ever gave a man who projected on me that I was cheating who made me delete my socials and end friendships only for it to be him all along and in different countries at different jobs with all different ethnicities little mr worldwide hoe, a chance.

[@ND-dx8og]

So relatable 😢 I am so sorry you had to go through this!

[@KeylahJooste-gj8rs]

@rainbowsnsunshineverywhereigo I feel you. I'm sorry you have to deal with that too. I also get anxiety attacks because of this, it's a horrible feeling I can imagine :(

[@ahoee]

yeah, i havent been full out cheated on, but borderline ( boundarys being broken , hiding/ lying about other female friends, “corn” usage, ect). even with this i was and still am traumatised months later, have panic attacks and almost nightly nightmares. i truely dont know how people are able to hurt someone they claim to love.

[@KeylahJooste-gj8rs]

@@ahoee What is cheating, if not breaking a set boundary, essentially? Your experiences are just as awful because each boundary you set, though different from others (for example, some are fine with "corn" usage and some are not), it is arguably just as terrible to break those boundaries and I'm sorry you had such a terrible partner.

[@REY.3727]

I love how the whole video is talking abt the moral failings of cheating and then at the end we just randomly get an emily lore drop where she ends up apologizing for how she treated a girl on a date and says she is going to need to actively work on some things 😭

[@notevenemily]

LMFAOOO i am definitely not perfect 😭 #confirmed

[@REY.3727]

@@notevenemily omg emily replied to me haiiii emily :3

[@nixymew987]

THE TIMING FOR THIS- I just found out my mom cheated on my dad like last night- holy fuck- 😭

[@unknown-ey3rw]

omg im so sorry! are you like- ok?

[@nixymew987]

@@unknown-ey3rwI’m doing as good as I can- lmao just stressed- thank you for asking tho that was nice of you!

[@deer5kull]

KZbin works harder.

[@GabrielaReyes-gr2qb]

Ik how it feels. Hope you are doing ok and find something healthy to cope. ❤❤

[@nixymew987]

@@GabrielaReyes-gr2qbthanks! I’m definitely trying lmao

[@carililyyarbrough2305]

my first ever relationship ended because I got cheated on and this person proceeded to go on and cheat on every single partner they had after me. it was so wild to witness

[@arthur622]

For a first ever relationship, that is brutal

[@Mercury-ok8ie]

Create a group chat for everyone they cheated on

[@rat1170]

@@Mercury-ok8ieYesss omg 😭

[@TechnoCheezit]

The trust issues are lowkey the worst part of it all, bc even if you move on, you will always have to be checking yourself when you get into new relationships. You’ll be shadowboxing all the time. Partner didn’t answer the phone one night? Maybe they’re cheating. Partner on a trip with the family? Maybe they’re cheating. Business trip? Maybe they’re cheating. It’ll drive you nuts. It’s crazy how trauma can affect your psyche.

[@dorottyabusa9664]

Fun fact, you don't even need to be the one getting cheated on to get that neat little side effect. My dad had an affair with a coworker before divorcing my mom and now decades later I'm still struggling with severe trust issues in relationships even though I was never actually cheated on. I love how easy it is to ruin somebody else's life for the sake of selfish desires.

[@venicec3310]

I agree it really messes with your psyche and how you question your ability to judge others character

[@bhocolatebhipbookies1713]

@@dorottyabusa9664so it’s not just me. I’ve had friends ask if I’ve ever been cheated on because I despise cheaters so much. Like no, I just saw how much it affected my mother

[@Koilve_89]

I swear cheating is the most annoying part in life.. because I have to deal with my besties going through depression. (just to clarify that my bestie has been thought multiple relationships)

[@alukardio6991]

What a self-absorbed comment 😦

[@burnt.norton]

@@alukardio6991 so annoying when ppl are willfully oblivious to satire

[@alukardio6991]

@@burnt.norton I am suffering through heartburn right now the last thing on my mind is to think twice about a comment. Sorry about that

[@burnt.norton]

@@alukardio6991 no its ok lol thats so real

[@CherieBlood]

And when they start trusting you to tell you things going on in their life… the AUDACITY

[@z0mb13v32]

I've been cheated on before and it literally sucks. My confidence was absolutely crushed, it took a while for me to heal. I'm so happy that I have a boyfriend who respects me now. He's literally the most kind and trustworthy person I know, it's like we're best friends and dating at the same time.

[@MalesAreDemons]

Awww sending hugs

[@Mar_Selcouth]

Aww, so glad you are doing good

[@jujutsucryin3256]

Happy for you! I hope for the same thing

[@patats5885]

so happy for you omggg 💗

[@shamiram1111]

so happy for you 🩷 while your ex is probably out there cheating on other innocent girls and staying in a miserable cycle 🙂‍↕️. these inspire me to not let insecure ppl make me drift away from love.

[@joegibbskins]

As a married guy, it’s really not that hard to not cheat. Like the idea of expending energy trying to get laid with a stranger is exhausting. Cheaters always act like things just happen, and maybe that’s true if you are a celebrity and people are throwing themselves at you, but if you are a regular person you had to try for it.

[@swtmm]

My ex cheated on me because “Your brother is mean” … BBY WHAT

[@danielamichaux8636]

Jail💀 I’m sorry you have to go through that

[@Vindominus]

@@swtmm Me when I ruin a solid relationship bc I don't like my girl's brother. 🤦🏽‍♂️

[@swtmm]

@@Vindominus best part... He has only SEEN my brother. Not spoken to him 💀

[@feliciaroseantonia]

​@@swtmmWhether or not your brother is actually mean, either way, its clear that guy was just using your brother as the flimsiest excuse ever. It's clearly not something that would ever justify something like cheating, because if he truly had that much of an issue with your brother, he could have just talked with you about it. & if it was THAT much of an issue to where the relationship couldn't work, then he literally just should have said that & broken up with you before even thinking about pursuing anyone else. It's just basic human decency tbh. You deserve better & I'm glad you're not with him anymore 💞

[@swtmm]

@@feliciaroseantonia i do deserve better and that's why I'm now dating women even though I still like men🤌🏼

[@artistaroundtheblock2047]

I really feel like not cheating on people is LESS WORK and therefore really easy. Like you want to put in the work to text, hide secrets, drive places, make up lies etc. That’s so hard and is so hard!!

[@mikaelahperez7097]

They probably just enjoy the thrill from playing the games, which again, just don't be in a relationship if that's the case 🙄😔

[@CoOlKyUbI96]

For sure it definitely is. I think it’s safe to say that’s an objective fact. I don’t think people cheat because they expect it to be less work

[@artistaroundtheblock2047]

@@mikaelahperez7097 Yeah. Relationships are not games. You’re ruining people’s lives but do you I guess 😒

[@artistaroundtheblock2047]

@@CoOlKyUbI96 They love the thrill of hide and seek 😒

[@namkia205]

It also is exhausting, I wanted to revenge cheat on my cheating ex, but all it did was exhaust me.

[@melan8ed197]

Cheaters are one bad thing but serial cheaters are a whole other beast. Like why don’t they just be non-monogamous?? Stop going into monogamous relationships with non-monogamous behavior

[@hypervisualttv]

honestly, I wouldn't wish a cheater on a poly relationship. Poly relationships are about more communication and more negotiation, and cheaters walk out on every obligation at a whim/impulse to fulfill their needs at the expense of their partner. Serial cheaters need to work on themselves, and stay very single until they can fix themselves.

[@lillypar8415]

@@hypervisualttv I totally agree with what you’re saying! But I think what OP might have been getting at is that they shouldn’t be in ANY relationship that requires loyalty. You can still cheat in a polyamorous relationship, but if you have the urge to cheat so much, then just don’t get into a relationship at all. Or find a partner who is also not interested in monogamy. I think maybe serial cheaters get into relationships and then cheat is because they’re straight up selfish. They want the benefits of the specific love, care and treatment that you get from a romantic relationship, but they don’t want to be ‘tied down’ to one person. AKA they want to be pampered and cared for but don’t want to adhere to the EGREGIOUS TASK (sarcasm) of being loyal to the person who loves them so much and treats them so well. But I have never been cheated on or cheated on anyone so I have no clue 😭 Again tho, I think your comment is super important because there is a difference between not being interested in commitment and having an unhealthy relationship with commitment. If your lifestyle choices include bulldozing over other people and leaving a trail of broken hearts in your wake, then you need to get your fucking shit together and go to therapy 💀

[@namkia205]

Cheaters will cheat even in a poly relationship lmao

[@lenar6381]

Cheaters are not welcome in ethical non monogamous communties and couples..they are not interested in communication or healthy boundaries

[@Klenovyj]

I'm sure it's often not much about the cheater wanting more physical/emotional contact with anyone, it's about feeling superior and risky, having power. You won't have that in ethical non-monogamy

[@John-hz8xy]

TL;DR - Cheating bad. unpopular opinion: not cheating on your partner is supposed to be the EASIEST part of a relationship. If you can't handle not cheating, then maybe you are not yet ready for a relationship.

[@HeatMiserr]

Or the cheaters are so much more ready than us for a relationship to a point that they unlock the ability to manage multiple relationships at once

[@karinalilhoe]

I'm brazilian, and here it's really sad to see how cheating is normalized (I know it is also normalized in other countries), a lot of soccer fans defend men like neymar, who cheated on his wife while she was pregnant. The funny thing is that they ask us: "Girl, did you win a champions?" As if neymar won that thing alone loll especially falling like a rotten banana in the ground during the game

[@leuanasantos1288]

BRASIL 🇧🇷🇧🇷

[@feliciaroseantonia]

NOT THE ROTTEN BANANA LMAOO 😭💀🍌

[@Cosmicdaydreamer]

Fr that's why I consider being a Neymar fan (specially if you're a man) a REALLY big red flag

[@chxrryery4188]

@@leuanasantos1288 LMFAOO 😂😂

[@chxrryery4188]

that’s so crazy especially since because he’s already famous I imagine it’d be hard to find love like that again

[@BonazaiGirl]

I’ve been cheated on and it absolutely wrecks you. Like, suddenly everything you thought your partner and yourself gets put into question, and suddenly it’s hard to piece together what was true in your relationship when you begin to see everything you thought you knew as a lie. It’s a betrayal that lingers and brings a sense of paranoia into your next relationship since you don’t know if the next person will hurt you the same way the last person who you _thought_ loved you did.

[@WickedKatze]

the reason Ned Fulmer's cheating scandal was so big was that he had an affair with an employee. so not only was he cheating, he was exploiting a workplace power dynamic. I assume they would have cut ties with him regardless because it was a really shitty thing to do, but the cheating wasn't the only issue there.

[@chang1129]

Yes, this! I wish Emily would have at least touch on the fact that the power dynamic is a huge issue

[@HeatMiserr]

@@chang1129 the power dynamic would only be relevant if he was blackmailing her into sex with threats to her safety or career. There’s no evidence of anything like that ever happening. They were two consenting adults. Sleeping with your boss or any powerful person doesn’t automatically make you any less accountable for your actions unless they use the power to force you into doing things you didn’t consent to.

[@nayaeongie]

"beyoncé" we all say in unison bc we knew it was coming

[@urarakasupremecist5671]

jay-z still being her husband is crazy to me.

[@nayaeongie]

@@urarakasupremecist5671 on lemonade she describes the process of thinking of leaving him but then deciding to forgive him in a very beautiful way that makes u really understand her decision but STILL like... it's BEYONCÉ

[@purplebluecrow5082]

@@nayaeongie beyonce has been with him since she was 18 and he was 30 she stayed because she was groomed by him, he literally got his teenage wife then still cheated on her, i feel so bad for her

[@detroitsouthwestlover]

holy shit she said this EXACTLY when i read this comment 😭

[@MysteriousTourniquet]

I recently got out of a long-term relationship of nearly six years. I was in a very bad place because of this, nearly losing my sense of self. But then he disclosed to me that he DID IN FACT cheated on me on different occasions and to make matters worse, with his students (not underage, mind you). He tried cheating sympathy out of me, because he did it to 'hurt himself and he didn't even had an orgasm', but to be honest it helped me get over him. When he was doing this, he knew I was hospitalized and sick as shit and it felt terrible. But at least I no longer miss him now and that is some kind of special relief.

[@marshxmalluw]

good for you! glad to hear the trash is out and you get to live your life ❤️

[@MysteriousTourniquet]

@@marshxmalluw Aww, thanks a lot! Best wishes to you, too!

[@DevoidVoid]

Basically the same happened to me. But I'm a male, and she came back 4-5 years later asking for sympathy after she did the same to her husband and got beaten badly for it... She didnt even acknowledge it or say sorry, and she actually didn't even say HI. Just straight into posting pictures for sympathy LMAO. I lost all my early adulthood and now 26, still finding it hard to even make friends from the trust issues 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 (actually kill me please)

[@MysteriousTourniquet]

@@DevoidVoid Oh no, you don't deserve this kind of person or behaviour! I mean, no one should get beaten up, but she shouldn't come for comfort to you after hurting you so bad. There is still time though. I am struggling with trust issues myself, but most importantly you have to build up trust in yourself - I believe in you!

[@unknown-ey3rw]

why tf are people normalizing this like- ITS THAT MAIN RULE OF HAVING A RELATIONSHIP???

[@franklambeth1148]

Lol 💯

[@f1mbultyr]

Polyamory is always an option. But you need EVERYBODY'S consent BEFOREHAND.

[@Mar_Selcouth]

That's what I thought, just be an adult and talk with your partner (and accept if they say they want a monogamous relationship)

[@mikebane2866]

@@f1mbultyr Nah, I’m poly, and nobody is entitled to know who I choose to sleep with or exchange nudes with. It’s queerphobic to discriminate against crypto-polyamorous individuals just because you don’t understand how trauma can paralyze one’s ability to tell other partners about their sex life because it’s triggering for us. Demanding I divulge such information is literally supporting white cis-hetero-allosexual Judeo-Christian supremacy.

[@Baer99Z]

I feel like a good amount of people who cheat do so just because they've never even been taught that polyamory is an option, doesn't mean them cheating is excusable in any way but damn, can we please start teaching people about how to do things CONSENSUALLY

[@PlaceholderName-b4d]

It still means you don't love your partner as you should, it's like cheating but being open about it.

[@murrVNC]

@@PlaceholderName-b4dthats not what polyamory is at all. polyamory requires the consent of every person involved, therefore it is not cheating. someone who is in a polyamorous relationship could love all their partners immensely and equally. they could also love one more than another, and that’s perfectly fine if none of their partners are bothered by it. polyamory requires so much communication between everyone involved. if someone is willing to talk for hours and days with their partners about individual boundaries, group boundaries, etc. it shows a great amount of love. as long as everyone is okay with what is happening, it is not cheating.

[@imagiccion]

I saw someone arguing that most forms of cheating actually constitute abuse, and I see a point there. The lying, the hiding, the questionable CONSENT because the other person doesn’t actually know what you are doing, aren’t consenting to being with a cheater, the cheater intentionally concealing what they are doing to keep their partner from breaking up with them... you get it.

[@hqunt3ddollq.ৎ]

theres trending songs about it. theres fanfic where its hot to cheat. its SO normalized now thats insane

[@elephorofonius]

there’s a whole genre for it lmao

[@rainbowsnsunshineverywhereigo]

If he’s cheatin I’m doin him worse no uno I hit the reverse! Like this shit is so lame and goofy corny and pathetic it really effing SUCKS that the kids growing up in this generation have this bullcrap normalizing such sickening unacceptable behavior

[@Lili_rivv]

Perhaps did you have the “tell your girlfriend” song in mind when you mentioned trending songs?

[@hqunt3ddollq.ৎ]

@@Lili_rivv yeahhhh i like the song but its literally so like... not ok

[@almogxchq5282]

@@Lili_rivv Also boyfriend, Unholy, Keep it to myself, etc. Almost every popular song delves into cheating territories.

[@coolchameleon21]

i honestly had no idea just how common cheating was until a few years ago. i always knew it happened, but i thought it was pretty rare. it makes me want to avoid dating forever lmao

[@sailor.neptxne]

fr

[@VideosForYou90]

Same!

[@Absolhunter251]

Same!!

[@KreeZafi]

Don't take my word for it but I vaguely recall seeing a statistic somewhere that approximately half of all people have cheated at some point. Which sounds like a wildly high number, idk how broadly it defined cheating, but sadly I don't find it THAT hard to believe either...

[@b19wing]

REAL😭

[@augustgremaud2738]

My ex of 2 years cheated on me with 2 of my good “friends”, with zero remorse. Most devastating experience of my life, made worse because she and her friends went out of their way to spread baseless rumors to sabotage my friendships and social life for my entire senior year of college, all to shift blame. I didn’t date for nearly 3 years afterwards, and even after several therapists and new meaningful relationships, the scars remain. Trust is hard and I have trouble loving as I once did, but things ARE better.

[@d-rabbitfor5398]

Same brother same

[@kamishin7135]

Hope the best for you bro

[@elithekpopguy9626]

Cheating IS a huge issue and I hate how normalized it is but I LOVE UR CONTENT SO MUCHHH

[@Tubemansi]

HARD agree on the whole "mistake" thing. Often times, people say "I made a mistake." when what they MEAN is "I made a bad choice." That's how you know they aren't mature enough to truly own up to what they've done. --- The lesbians "fighting" over the check was one of my favorite little jokes from you. 😁 I hope you find a truly "everescent" being who will love you, and encourage you to film a playthrough of "Hatoful Boyfriend".

[@krishellw7957]

It’s so sad to see how much people cheat. Before me and my boyfriend left for college we had a very in depth conversation about what to do if we meet someone else. There are millions of people we could meet while in our studies and we both told each other we’d rather break up on good terms and explore and maybe reconnect later in life than than break each others hearts. Three years later everything has been great! People will do anything but break up these days tho

[@AikiraBeats]

The fact that cheating is so common that amongst the people I know at least five of them have been cheated on, and seeing the devastation that happens directly due to the cheating is so heartbreaking. That person never truly goes back to their regular self. Cheating is selfish all the way around.

[@sheenaghm3053]

My ex-fiancee had low self-esteem due to her problems with alcohol and body issues, so I helped her to get off the booze, get therapy and personal training, etc. She became more confident, got more attention from women, and started cheating. I didn't date again for three years because I ended up with trust issues, and felt so humiliated and stupid.

[@MlleGaufre]

You shouldn't feel stupid, you should feel proud, you tried to do good out of your own volution for someone you truly loved and cared about. That's effort and commitment, the only person that should feel stupid is your ex-fiancee for disrespecting you and your trust, even though you helped her at her lowest of lows. She didn't deserve you and doesn't deserve to live at peace for what she has done to you.

[@H41030v3rki110ny0u]

​@@MlleGaufrefeels bad af building someone up for them to betray you like that, took me almost 4 years to get over it

[@tristanneal9552]

The bit with people calling in had me rolling, one of your funniest to date. It just kept getting more outlandish

[@sydani1887]

as a person who has cheated, that was not a mistake. i was intentionally selfish and cared more about my feelings in a moment than someone else’s for the rest of their lives. cheating is not a mistake

[@sunsetanimator4187]

People desperately want to have the benefit of their partner whilst acting like their single, which is why they lie so hard, because they want both, and they wouldn’t get the thrill of cheating on someone if they were single, for many I believe that’s the case, they openly seek these things out, the same applies to home wrecker tendencies, the affair partner isn’t interested unless their target is married or in a committed relationship.

[@hasuramapa4639]

Absolutely. I knew what the fuck i was doing. Intentionally blocking off your empathy for the hurt you are about to cause for a person you love because you are horny, isn't a mistake

[@mapleshadeeatscats]

I think that intentional, selfish decisions can’t be accidental. But they can be a mistake.

[@lucyandecember2843]

o.o

[@user-dv9xx3yy8v]

Always doing the same mistake?

[@SkyXIII]

I personally got so neglected from my partner that I was ready to cheat. But because I still loved her, I told her if nothing changes I will break up. Nothing changed, I broke up and then found someone else

[@lilcomment]

That’s how it should be, You tell them what, why, and how. And if they still refuse/ deny, then *break up* with them first *then* find another better partner. Not that hard to do so 🙄

[@SkyXIII]

@@lilcomment Unfortunately for many people it seems it is. Or they just want to have a backup

[@SamiaIslam-t6c]

The fact that people who don't cheat nowadays seems like a complete angel compared to the cheaters even tho it's like a bare minimum

[@bluebird_618]

If you ask my friend’s ex husband, he cheated because he was “being tempted by the devil” 🙄 He is the least impressive person I’ve ever had the misfortune of knowing.

[@rainbowsnsunshineverywhereigo]

Yeah gross the man who cheated on me kept trying to apologize for falling into his temptations and not being able to resist the temptation. Like ew if your idea of true love involves being tempted to fuck other women then we clearly have 2 different concepts of it and good riddance go struggle to resist your weirdo temptations that apparently can’t be resisted tf elsewhere man.

[@rorothedragonshroomie2760]

Is bro Judge Frollo?? 😂

[@jmarshal]

“Bro, you’re so unimpressive, even the devil isn’t interesting in tempting you.”

[@JonMollu]

LMAOOO THE DEVIL? no that's crazy, he didn't even try to justify it

[@apotato4939]

Why is that exactly what my dad said when he cheated on my mom? He also likes to say it was a “mistake” as if cheating isn’t a conscious decision

[@Hendrik_McSims]

I'm glad I was raised in a family where cheating and disloyalty is very much frowned upon. I could not imagine what it would be like if it was normalized. I once was in a conversation with some people my age and they were like "Yeah, it's okay you cheated, since he cheated on you before." Like no, this is not how that works.

[@themagicalcupcakeunicorn5755]

My dad cheated on my mom twice and they split, my grandpa cheated on my grandma and had a baby with the other woman, and my uncle cheated on his wife. This has (and still does) lead me to believe that all men are cheaters and now I just accepted the fact I will more than likely never be in a relationship because of my trust issues😅. Weird how that works when it didn’t even happen to me lol.

[@kingb3746]

@@themagicalcupcakeunicorn5755for some people I know it’s the opposite and it’s all women in my friends family. This Fucks people up ik. But to have the mindset of “its all them” can never help anyone 😞

[@themagicalcupcakeunicorn5755]

@@kingb3746 Yeah, it also sucks cause the media never makes it any better by always showcasing failed relationships due to infidelity. Maybe my views will change someday, though I doubt it.

[@nightwingalelle2849]

i love your videos because it feels like the popular girl at school has a newscast to and for the girlies. ur videos make me sit up straight and drink my water. 10/10 vibes all around

[@pearlie4075]

I genuinely don't understand why cheating exists or WHYY people do it?? like if you don't love your partner anymore then talk to them about it.. if there isn't a spark anymore then just talk with them about how you feel.. I dont understand how its so normalized these days especially on the younger generation its so sick.. 😓

[@usertedi]

yeah it makes me rly sad, there’s a huge communication issue w the current generation

[@stuffystuffsityas6302]

People give up too easily, and think just because their feelings have changed they can act on them - not even thinking of working on their own relationship.

[@Mandyblows]

No forget working on it, if someone is thinking about cheating , you can sit here and talk about it but that person will eventually want to cheat again ​@@stuffystuffsityas6302

[@munmun__]

​@@usertedialways been like that People just talk more about it Before people who were cheated on felt too ashamed and in some chases couldnt leave their partner anyway and kept their eyes closed

[@MySchoolProject15]

@@stuffystuffsityas6302 There's this insane idea that you're supposed to be passionately in love with the person you're with 100% of the time. That's literally not even how love works; the whole "I can't stop thinking about you!" infatuation thing only lasts a couple of months or years at most. But people think *that's* love. It's not; it's just the big flare of light and heat you get when you first light a campfire with gasoline. Actual love is like the warm cozy supportive feeling you get when the fire's burned down a little and you're toasting marshmallows. And you actually have to do the work and put more logs on the fire to keep it burning. Love is way better than infatuation, but it also takes more work.

[@nadymirelly5912]

I hate the whisper app because it seems like cheating is literally a hobby. You can also stay single, you know

[@Honeybaggsss]

Right if you can’t do commitment just don’t date and fling around

[@lisagiudici4680]

Your videos are so 2015 coded… it’s so soothing honestly 🫶

[@cemremmutlu]

I hate how people have been normalising cheating by saying things like ''If I'm in love with other people and my partner at the same time, it's not my fault 🥺'' or some 12-20 year-old straight girls who are extremely obsessed with bl/mlm say ''If my bf cheated me with a man, I'd be extremely overjoyed 😝''?????? I literally cannot understand these type of people

[@anarchistalex]

I feel like the thing where women say that they'd be fine with their boyfriends cheating on them with men (or where men say the same about their girlfriends cheating on them with women) stems from the fact that they don't see queer relationships as genuine or valid, more like a fetish/kink sort of thing. It's really sad imo

[@cemre_mutlu]

FR 💀 i just can't stand them

[@cemremmutlu]

​@@anarchistalex Unfortunately, it's always the ones who are obsessed with yaois and Thai & East Asian bl series. They perceive lgbt only as h00kups

[@Mar_Selcouth]

I mena, it's not your fault love two persons, but it's your fault cheat. They don't think in talking with their partner? and discuss open the relationship or if the other person want to be monogamous, then they should chose if they prefer they actual partner or they broke and after the can be with the other person if they also want.

[@klutzykaya6439]

fr like they act like they're some poor yearning hopeless romantic. my hot take apparently is that you can be attracted to other people but simply choosing to idk, NOT ACT on those attractions really isn't that hard and if they can't pull it off it's their own fault? or at least say SOMETHING to their current partner bc good god the partner doesn't deserve the turmoil aaaaaghhh

[@Vivabyt3]

It's insane to me when people get cheated on and are hurt but stay with the cheater anyway

[@d.dr.v42]

Low self esteem will do that to you, before entering any romantic relationship you should develop a decent sense of self or people are just going to use you

[@erinyes3943]

Also, sunk cost. Personally I could never stay with a cheater, because I would lose all trust in the relationship, but if it’s been a long and mostly happy relationship I understand why other people might try to fix it instead of ending it. You’ve already spent so much time with this person, and know them and love them, even if they’ve done something terrible, so the idea of having to give up your life together and start all over again feels like too much.

[@vespertine2004]

some people have different ways to view situations and every “cheating” situation has their own context and nature,sometimes is not about the self steem is about the lying,is about the person they did it with etc etc and the same way you might be affected by your partner cheating is not the same another person experiences it

[@coolchameleon21]

@@erinyes3943but the trust is shattered. the relationship will never be the same

[@rainbowsnsunshineverywhereigo]

I did this and 2 years later it still eats me alive every day. Every single new day I get closer to thinking maybe I’ve built the courage to put myself first and leave this all behind. I have no idea why I’ve stayed this long I guess it’s truly is like this quote that goes “I know you’re not the one I’m looking for, but I’m so cold, and a fire is a fire” ouch. I guess I’m just longing to believe that who I thought he was is real and I’m in denial of who I found out he truly secretly is. Although at the depths of my heart I know I will never be able to live on like this, I know I’ll always wonder how why, I still have this dumb weird care and love that won’t leave and still love whatever love IS there and whatever we HAVE built together and enjoyed together.. I’d rather have that than nothing. I truly have nobody and nothing else in my lonely little life. So I cling to the relationship hoping he’ll never cheat again but forever staying worried and anxious of it. But I guess it’s that once I let that go I’ll finally have so much more. But it’s just the fear of not knowing if it’ll actually get better after leaving and worrying if I’ll make a mistake. (Which- ugh, how? He’s the one who made the mistake throwing this away I never wanted any of this downfall now I just gotta deal with this bs cause of the actions HE chose. It’s insane and I used to judge others for staying after cheated on but now I get it sorta..

[@BBJ21441]

I think cheating is horrible and a disgusting thing to do. But what gets me so confused and angry - are the mind games afterwards. Not letting the partner see your phone, lying that you’re faithful. Why does the cheater have to add that extra layer of betrayal.

[@Valentineofthevoid]

I was cheated on over SIX TIMES BY THE SAME PERSON but he was always accusing me of cheating and jealous of everything. Funny enough when I told my bestfriend they told me “Really you got cheated on? But you’re so pretty!”

[@Greutter1999]

yeah I've heard that they're always accusing the other person of it because they know how easy it is for them to do it

[@uh4875]

Break up was due 5 times ago

[@shamiram1111]

getting cheated on has nothing to deal with your beauty or even you. the most beautiful people get cheated on alll the time. it has everything to do with them and that’s why i just leave and don’t take it too personal.

[@bubas420]

I don’t see the “I still love you even if I cheated” 😭 YOU DONT CHEAT ON SOMEONE YOU LOVE. Bc if you and your partner are in a poly relationship, ITS FINE. That’s totally fine but if it’s a monogamous relationship, why? 😭

[@Mar_Selcouth]

Just a clarification, you can cheat in a poly relationship, it's all about boundaries and what you talked. Like if you stablish to say to your partner if there's another person and you don't do it. If all the people involved are okay and consent it's not cheating, it's just having another relation.

[@Soulcrash3]

​@@Mar_Selcouth Yeah open and poly aren't the same.

[@moonshinershonor202]

Maybe they want to eat their cake n eat it too? Like this is my slice I married, and I want that other one too.

[@bubas420]

@@Mar_Selcouth thank you for the clarification.

[@crzycatpurse.in_2.0]

Girl you got me with the “in and out and in and out” then the “that’s burning calories”. So damn funny as per usual 😂🖤

[@vVendetta69]

I can’t wrap my head around it either. All through highschool and college I’ve seen people around me talk about it but it’s never appealed to me. I’m head over heels for my partner and she’s an absolute sweetheart.

[@Vindominus]

As someone who is constantly tripping and falling into women, this is so valid. (Not really, I'm very much single)

[@usertedi]

LMAO 😭😭

[@Astrolionking]

When you mentioned polyamory, I got so scared bc I am polyamorous. I’m with two people, the third person showing up bc my partner, who at first wasnt poly, liked someone. And we all love each other so much. And as someone with two people, I cannot imagine messing around behind their backs.

[@jmarshal]

Remember people, never be the other wo(man). If you know they’re taken, then you’re no better than them. And no, they’re probably not going to leave their wife/husband for you, and yes, they will cheat on you, too.

[@julian7434]

When I was younger I thought it was dumb when people constantly question and check on their partner. There is a genuine fear and experience that led to this.

[@Paroex]

The most paranoid/distrustful people in relationships are usually A) people with trust issues from having been cheated on B) cheaters who project their own personalities onto others and suspect others of being like themselves

[@carolinejohnsonn]

i will never understand cheating on your partner instead of ending things and seeing other people after your separated😭 why choose the more exhausting option that benefits no one

[@JupiterTao26]

Is it so hard to have decency? Like seriously is it really? If u want to be with someone else, fucking break up and dont put them through more pain.

[@usertedi]

THIS!! if ur not satisfied, communicate that. it will hurt them much less and it’s just the right thing to do.

[@La-PetitMort]

Some people are just immoral spineless cowards (yes I'm in the Beyonce club 😝)

[@theoryfoxes1879]

Tbf, a portion (don't know how big though, probably not that big) of the people who cheat do so when trapped in abusive relationships as a means of feeling that they have any control over their life. HOWEVER, that is not an excuse, as it's honestly better to move out, return to a family member or friend, go to the different shelters that exist for people trapped in such situations (although if you're a guy, then at least here, you're outta luck with this option most likely. Can't speak for the US though.)

[@milii113]

​@@theoryfoxes1879 This was my situation in my first long term relationship that I essentially just fell into without really really understanding either myself or the other person that well (I was 17 at the time, they were 22). After 2 years of not really ever being happy yet always threatened that "I'd never find anyone better" and essentially being the guys personal entertainer for 6-8 hours a day and generally feeling like I was trapped for the bulk of the latter half of it. I started branching out behind their back and that was the thing that finally let me escape. It still haunts me to this day that I didn't have the spine to just end the relationship instead of doing something that ended up causing a lot more pain. I don't think cheating is ever justified, especially if you're doing it with any shred of intent to hurt your existing partner, but also framing it as some "stain on the soul" feels a step too far. I dont particularaly blame people for defaulting to that especially if they've been on the receiving end, since at the very least it indicates a gross misunderstanding of relationships in general, but it can be overcome given enough genuine self reflection.

[@grednforge23]

​@theoryfoxes1879 this is what happened to me. I know what I did was wrong, and I haven't talked to either my ex or the other guy in years now. We never actually did anything, because I was in a different state away from him and my entire family. I got out of that relationship and that state as soon as I could once that started, but I know it was still wrong. But you're completely right that it was a way for me to feel some level of control over my life, and actually feel attractive and, even though he was Also lying to me the entire time, loved. Or some semblance of love. The whole thing still has me fucked up and I'm working through it and working on myself. My current partner also is very aware of all of it and has never judged me for it, which does help a lot.

[@mynamename]

Honestly, for me to open up to even one person and have an intimate relationship with them is already hard enough. So when I'm in a relationship, it's 100% that I'm head over heels in love. I can't even imagine what kind of person you have to be to sleep with everyone and cheat on your partner. It always sounded crazy to me.

[@mercury8198]

The thing that really gets me is when people are like “this is why people cheat “ bc how am I responsible for YOU cheating

[@angelthedemon666]

When I was in highschool, an acquaintance of mine who didn't smoke, asked me (stoner at the time) if weed makes people lose control of their actions and I said no, she started crying because her boyfriend had cheated and said it wasn't his fault because he was high 🙄 I hate those kinds of excuses

[@franklambeth1148]

It amplifies your personality rather for good or bad

[@availlaponcet5877]

Fr the thing is like. Why be in committed relationship if you don't want to be a committed relationship?? Huh?

[@jmarshal]

For the benefits of course. Someone at home, usually a wife who is cooking and cleaning and looking after kids, someone to have s3x with when they don’t want to go out looking. It’s a have my cake and eat it, too, situation.

[@kelsynicole9135]

Bc societal pressure to be in a monogamous relationship. But I agree they should not be in a committed relationship, I wish society didn’t demonize being single so much.

[@annetheelf8174]

I agree with Kennie JD when she said "cheating is an act of someone who hates you" which I know is a very strong stance to take. I think cheating is abusive in different ways. It's definitely emotionally abusive but I also think it can be sexual abuse if you have unsafe sex because you could easily give an STD to the person you're cheating on

[@Secretsaver]

I listen to The breakup breakdown podcast which will invite therapists and psychologists on after an episode and the ones that really dig deep into the psychology behind a cheater are fascinating. I'm oversimplifying it, but it's hardly ever as simple as just choosing not to do it. It's like a slippery slope of false justifications, convincing themselves, self sabotage and loathing that can lead them to cheat. Not trying to justify or defend cheaters because it really fkn sucks that they hurt others with their actions. But it's kinda like how victims of domestic violence will justify staying in a harmful relationship before hopefully, finally leaving. We humans loooove to convince ourselves out of or into things.

[@funky4495]

its so annoying to me when ppl say they "made a mistake" as if they like misspelled someones name on a birthday card,, like it is so easy to just NOT cheat. If someone flirts with you "i have a partner" and if they persist after that just leave?? it makes np sense to me

[@aibhe]

I love that you bring up this topic because I've been on a lengthy discussion about this with my friend. We are both victims of cheaters and think that it ruined our lives, but while I can understand the complexity of it and consider certain circumstances of cheating "justified", my friend was very black and white about it all, insisting that no matter the circumstance, it's not justified. So when you talk about how the general populace don't really react negatively towards certain cheating circumstances, I am reminded of a couple of instances where someone or two people are actually cheating or having an affair but people are rooting for them, both fictional and in real life. In fiction, I've only just now realized this because I was rewatching Titanic (post having that discussion with my friend) and it hit me how Jack and Rose are technically having an affair, with Rose being the one cheating on Cal because they are engaged. As we all know, most people root for Jack and Rose and hate Cal, and I think obviously this is because Rose was in an arranged marriage of sorts, so the relationship isn't exactly built on mutual feelings (plus Cal is abusive). But this is the exact example I kept bringing up to my friend why some circumstances where there's cheating, it's complicated and not necessarily something I condemn. In real life, I can't help but think of Princess Diana's situation. A little before her death, she began an affair with James Hewitt and there were rumours of Prince Harry being a child born not from Charles but another man, but regardless of whether the latter is true or not, most people love Diana and never condemned her for any of these. This is yet another circumstance in which cheating is "justifiable" though not necessarily in the same way as Titanic's case. For this one, people justify it because Charles was the one who cheated on Diana first with Camilla - which presents yet another interesting thing I've observed which is that people don't extend the same sympathies for Charles even though his marriage with Diana was essentially an arranged marriage of sorts because he was into Camilla before Diana even came into the picture.

[@beetz420]

i was in a relationship for 2 years and he was cheating on me the WHOLE TIME!!! it really does suck balls

[@_.a.s.t.r.o.n.o.m.y._]

Cheating is the dumbest shit ever bro just get a divorce or break up

[@yoo912]

@@ghostinlovewithaflowercheating with kids is even worse

[@ghostinlovewithaflower]

I saw a video on Instagram of a girl approaching her girlfriend when she didn’t expect to see her, and the girlfriend was with another woman, so the girl was like “Hey that’s my girlfriend?” And when I tell you the other lady said “She’s my girlfriend now” and they just stood there, arms over the shoulders, and the main girl ran away crying… THE WAY MY JAW DROPPED AT THE AUDACITY BRO

[@Hollycb12]

Can I just say how much I love the little skits she puts on with herself. Cracks me up 😂

[@Ruddpocalypse]

I have never had a partner before, so I cannot begin to fathom how people are just so willing to ruin their own for some cheap thrill

[@yvesmijo]

i think that people cheat because somehow, is the easiest decision. i think that a lot of people don't know that it is common to feel attracted to other people when you are in a relationship, but the thing is, instead of choosing to deny your attraction and choosing to value your relationship, which is "hard", it's so easy to just do whatever stupid thing you want and then drown in self pity later.

[@drchung19]

This is a great video. I think it shows how forced monogamy is in the senses that people in it don’t want it but stay in it because that’s the only acceptable form of relationships. Your points about how media encourages cheating is so real. Because what we intake because we believe and what we believed becomes what we exhibit