r/AmITheA**Hole For Telling My Husband He Isn't As Good A Dad As He Thinks He Is?

#AITA #Reddit #Story

[@SaphireSalvatore940]

The period stories always shock me. I asked my bf if he could grab me some tampons and I got "sure, what flavour?" Because of the different coloured boxes 😂 he knows that's not the reason for the colours but how fast he came out with it stunned me haha. Men who help women out with this are awesome

[@Darsam88]

My Wife's Father used to and her Brother still thinks it's gross to go to the store and get that stuff for their SOs. She still to this day tells me I don't need to get her stuff because of these interactions. No matter how often I go get them she tells me I don't have to every time because she thinks I'm embarrassed about it.

[@SaphireSalvatore940]

@@Darsam88 you are a gent and your wife is a lucky lady :) it's unfortunate she had just bad experiences growing up that's altered her view

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

This is normal behavior.

[@Sir_Gerald_Nosehairs.]

Firstly, being British doesn't guarantee you free use of the NHS forever and ever. You need to prove you're ordinarily resident in the UK, which she apparently was not. Secondly, mental healthcare provision in the NHS is a national scandal. Not only is said provision small, it is greatly over subscribed. Most people end up paying privately or going without. Thirdly I am no expert on American law, but the idea any lawyer would tell her she would win full custody of a child after being out of the country for years is having a giraffe. No court that was half sane would give anything but supervised visitation at least at the beginning. Quite honestly, I think she's not telling the truth about a fair number of things.

[@nottheone7269]

Yeah taking it at face value the story comes off as really weird and that really hit me when she said anything about the lawyer. What court would give FULL custody to a parent that's never been in the child's life

[@immapotato1]

@@nottheone7269 I remember a case where the dad got temporary custody for his kid after mom went to jail for drug charges for 2 years then after her release the same judge immediately gave mom full custody back even though it was already proven she had kept the kid in a drug house before so sanity is not necessarily common in custody cases and messed up mothers

[@ZombieSazza]

Yup, took me close to a year to get PTSD specific therapy with the NHS, and because I’m permanently physically disabled and about 90% bedridden with mobility issues, I rely on Scottish government state benefits for being disabled, and thus can’t afford private healthcare. Private healthcare is limited for where you can fill prescriptions. I have a lot of prescriptions for my physical conditions and have specialised medications (close to 30 pills a day, such is life) and I can’t have those messed up as I rely on my meds to have a half decent quality of life. So even if I could afford private healthcare, I literally can’t because I need to guarantee those specialised medications. I just have to wait on NHS waiting lists, this goes for my physical conditions, autism, and PTSD, waiting more than 12 months is not unexpected and is the norm because unsurprisingly, the NHS is underfunded and understaffed. It’s not uncommon to wait 12-18 months for appointments with specialised parts of the NHS, that’s just how it goes. If I could afford private healthcare and it didn’t mess with where I could get prescriptions, I’d go to private, but I have a lot of friends with chronic pain conditions (like me with nerve damage, others PCOS, fibromyalgia, cancer et al) and they’ve had their medications messed around and they heavily rely on them, so it massively puts me off knowing it would completely mess with the very medications giving me a half decent quality of life. Such is the way of life tbh, it’s wonderful we have the NHS, but it’s severely underfunded and understaffed, which honestly feels criminal.

[@alexanderhenby1362]

So American courts try to keep kids with mom, HOWEVER, this story had a few red flags for me, One OP and her husband split while she was pregnant. Two, there is no current legal agreement for custody (so no court is saying she can only have supervised visitation) and three OP knew they were going to have to go to court. This guy sounds like an abuser using a child to abuse OP. She wasnt absent for decades, she was absent to get help she could afford. Most states, this is open and shut Mommy gets kiddo, (as long as she is cleared by a doctor, which sounds like she was)

[@andysheepleton]

Yeah and it was super gross that her goal was to take her son back and divorce her husband. She actually wants to take the child away from their sole primary caregiver. Literally the most psychologically damaging thing you could do to a toddler. She seems diagnosably delusional, and not completely in touch with reality. Her focus on how bad her husband is would be typical for someone who was suffering from delusions. If the husband sees this he should really get in touch with her caregiver. I don't think she is playing with a full deck.

[@laurensmith20]

For the period story I was chanting "good man! good man!" over and over again about the brother. Man I hate people who think periods are shameful when basically half of the freaking population gets them.

[@Mysecretmuffinstash]

Me too! Dad shamed his daughter and son! He needs educated on what periods are and why females get them.

[@sirpw9205]

C u in the n t

[@katieb.1184]

especially making the sister wait for the help? like... that's shitty parenting to make your kid wait for help because "female problemmmms"

[@livewellwitheds6885]

so glad he called out his shitty dad! he is a better parent this the mom and dad

[@lynnw7155]

That dad is the definition of 'toxic masculinity'.

[@troubleinthevalley5884]

Naw, that was the PERFECT time and place to call Austin out. Right there in front of everybody AS IT WAS HAPPENING. We ALL need to do more of this. And your wife's family completely sucks. How on earth did you even marry into that?!

[@SilverMKI]

And also explicitly call out the entire family for enabling the bullying at the same time.

[@ximkai8794]

*Calls the kid insecure, kid immediately runs to his room to cry.* So... OP called it right then, or...?

[@troubleinthevalley5884]

@@ximkai8794 hahaha for real

[@Keyonne88]

@@SilverMKI This. "I'm surprised no one else has told you not to act like a bully already."

[@harrycheetham]

OP needs to divorce that women and get away from that family.

[@franl155]

Abusive parents grieving over losing a child: they lost that child 16 years before - they lost her as soon as she left home and changed her name. If OP's wife did all that to get away from her family, and if she specifically said that they were never to be allowed contact with her daughter, then she must have had bloody good reason.

[@sx5r]

exactly. imho OP has a really good chance of closing this once and for all since he has the SIL as interpreter. I would say something like this: "This will not happen ever. If you push me I will go to war over this. If your parents overstep this boundary, I will burn their lives to the ground if need be. Relay this in whichever way you deem fit, but never EVER question this boundary again. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

[@alenasenie6928]

The story of the bully that mocks his cousin: "you shouldn't call him a bully, he has insecurities" I can't fathom this level of irony, I mean, mocking someone for a visible injury that is sure to make him insecure in the future, something the cousin can't change, is not poking at insecurities but calling out the bullying, something completely on the control of the bully, is poking out insecurities? I just don't have the neurons to comprehend that little self awareness

[@Twilight24682]

OP in the bullying story was 100% NTA and was right bullies are horrid people and it’s about time they got called out as a victim of bullying myself it’s always good to see people not staying quiet and speaking up for bully victims

[@carolgibson-wilson4354]

There was no one else at home but my Daddy when I woke up to discover I had my 1st period. He handled it beautifully, from how to use the sanitary belt (before stick on pads) to soaking sheets and pj bottoms. This was over 60 years ago. The dad in this post is a big ahole.

[@piiinkDeluxe]

❤

[@PurpleUnicornBarf]

Omg I love that for you!! 💞

[@eph2vv89only1way]

The op who was there for his sister when she needed him instead of waiting for a woman to get off work and do it is a champion! Op did the right thing for his sister and the dad is ta.

[@marli4442]

yep grate brother i don't have a sister and i always ask my brother to help well he gets a little annoyed somtimes but thats understandable

[@sirpw9205]

The was was a c u in the n t

[@leatcanned]

@@sirpw9205 Eh, Not his job. Still Should have been more concerned, periods don't just stop and can be dangerous (or lead to dangerous situation), It needs to be explained to him as thus, becuase I can tell you as a man who has several little sisters, allot of men I meet get passed over when it comes to this part of the conversations from mom or health class and it is a Shock when it happens. Also the brother needs to curtails his own words/actions your father is your father and if you think not knowing something makes you incompetent, then your in for a world of hurt later in life. TlDR: The sons llooking for a reason to fight, bad idea. The dad needs a catch up on bio and to be proactive, The daughter is the most effected here, lets start by gettng her some personal supplies and moving from there.

[@sarahdelgado6399]

​@@marli4442 ty

[@JadeAkelaONeal]

​@@leatcannedthat's literally where the brother started. Idiot.

[@robbiprendergast7759]

OP did NOT overreact to his father's behavior, rather his mother, sister and girlfriend under-reacted. How sad that even in these modern times OPs fathers behavior has been normalized to the extent that he gets a pass for his misogynistic behavior.

[@valthearastormcry1420]

That period one pisses me off. That would have meant three hours in either bloody clothes or in borrowed clothes and potentially bloody borrowed clothes

[@morticiaaddams7866]

Agreed. Toilet paper only does so much.

[@claritey]

Wtf does that family think bullying is? Making fun of, teasing or messing with someone in a way that belittles them about something they may be insecure about like a bad burn scar is 100% bullying. Teasing is only not bullying if the person it's directed at thinks it's all in good fun. Like two brothers insulting each other but they both end up laughing and bonding over it. What the 19yr old was doing was not that, it was hurtful and rightfully deserved to be called a bully.

[@mikehilbert9349]

That story pissed me off. The poor cousin has got to feel completely abandoned by his family. It is pure hellcwhen you are being tormented by a bully and the ones who should protect you are defending the bully. If that cousin harms himself, they are all to blame.

[@claritey]

@@mikehilbert9349 agreed. That family thinking his behavior is at all acceptable says a lot about who they are as people.

[@katieb.1184]

I thought I might be too biased with it because that's how my family is... everything is "teasing." So I'm like... okay... is this a knee-jerk moment to thinking of comments about thick thighs or inability to tan making me ugly... or was this abhorrent bullying

[@claritey]

@@katieb.1184 No it was bullying and it sounds like your family may have been bullying you too. I can't say for sure because it all depends on what your reaction to it is. If you find the comments hurtful and they keep doing it even though you told them its hurtful and to please stop then thats bullying. If you dismiss it as stupid teasing and it doesn't hurt you then its just stupid teasing

[@katieb.1184]

@@claritey oh yeah, my family did a mix of the two and loved to point out it's all in good fun." I'm better at pushing back for my kids than I ever was for myself... my parents are only now realizing I wasn't happy growing up with it and that I wasn't joking when I said it wasn't funny. but because of that I'm always second-guessing my view on it (even with my kids) thinking I might be taking things more seriously than the target of the jabs

[@oooiluvpancakesooo7781]

Alia is a new hero of mine. Yeah, she likes picking fights with assholes. Good on her. I hope she never quits.

[@gregoryzn87]

Ah yes. A victim of abuse has taken the abuse for years and they're ok with it because they say nothing.

[@skyelindsey687]

1st story. Look up Andrea Pia Yates from Houston, Texas. That’s what the judge was probably thinking of when they awarded the father full custody. Granted on top of the PPP Andrea also had PPD and schizophrenia, but why chance it happening to more kids if the judge could prevent it.

[@rubymeaddle]

OP got treatment though

[@spikesgirl9371]

So did Yates.

[@War-Time-Leader]

@@spikesgirl9371however yates husband kept telling her to get off of birth control to have more children due to religious reason which made her condition worse it’s not the same situation

[@spikesgirl9371]

@War-Time-Leader my point was that she also got treatment. It was not enough and like you said her husband is directly responsible for those kids deaths. Of all the women who have murdered thier kids, she was the only one I felt sorry for. She is also the only one that is refusing to attempt to get out. She has said she deserves to die where she is.

[@iwantsifegold]

Why do I feel like OP is lying about the daughter's death?

[@littlestrawberryfaery]

It felt very murdery tbh like it was planned...

[@Shangori]

Vindictive and cruel. He certainly was the asshole for cheating. But the way she reacted to everything makes me think she's anything but a good person either.

[@BodyLanguageAnalysisInterrogat]

I think it feels like that because it is so shocking and rare for someone that young would pass away suddenly. Unfortunately it does happen and it is tragic. However if she is lying, it is probably that she is raising her very alive daughter and wants to keep her full time. I doubt anyone trying to pull anything would write into Reddit but you never know. I guess I would hope the daughter is alive 😢

[@waterdragondelta]

omg omg omg, story 1!? I’m less than five minutes in and I am freaking out. How are people focusing on this one thing, “she was gone for too long, she shoulda been there, should have been responsible, she could have killed her baby.” Am I crazy or are the comments subtly (okay, maybe just… obliquely) contradictory? Postpartum Depression is awful, and postpartum psychosis is clearly more terrifying for everyone in that child’s life. She made a painful decision in order to protect her child, because being safe for him was apparently a priority for her. I don’t understand how that is NOT responsible. I agree that the OP needs to give more context and information in general, but I also understand why she may not want to divulge past a certain point given the personal nature of her condition, the intense shame parents feel during and after it, not to mention the fact that any information she shares may find it’s way to her husband, his lawyer and the court in general. Just. There may be legit, GOOD reasons to call the OP the asshole, but “your biology proves a personal failing that can never be fully overcome because it was scary” is bullshit.

[@Tomoeine]

I feel like I'm the crazy one reading these comments. I feel awful for this mother. If she's gone through and finished her treatment, and now is desperately wanting to be in her son's life now that she can think like a normal mother... that's so heartbreaking. Essentially, she is the mother and person she would have been right now without the illness. There are so many parents in this world who genuinely don't want their kids, and here you have a mother who fought a serious mental illness so that she can care for her son. I understand the father's worry, and I think OP needs to take it slow, but these comments are way too fucking brutal for someone who took exactly the right steps in fighting a horrible, nasty mental illness. PPP can take up to a year to treat, and not only is the baby's life in danger - but mothers with PPP are also likely to commit suicide within the first year after birth. Yet almost all people who go through treatment make a full recovery. These commenters effectively told OP "Your life doesn't mean shit, your baby's life doesn't mean shit, because you shouldn't have abandoned your son with a serious mental illness." WTF. Fuck reddit sometimes.

[@febriantireke5427]

Oh thank God I'm not the only one. Where was his support. Ppd/ppp is horrid. I had ppd from my first and it didn't clear up until 6 months after my second. That are 2 years apart.

[@Chem_-jp5em]

Thank you! Reddit is such a toxic thing place!!!

[@cult_of_odin]

By the gods you people. Imagine a man said he needed time away for his mental health and left. You people would lose your minds and tell a woman to "cut him off" you bunch of hypocritical POS.

[@Chem_-jp5em]

@@cult_of_odin she had a medical condition. She had post parfum psychosis. Her brain was literally wrong due to all the weird ass hormone imbalances that happen after pregnancy, she was literally in Denver of killing her baby if she didn’t go to a hospital to get treatment. It’s like post partum depression but on steroids. It’s awful.

[@demonheart13]

Period OP might need to ditch his girlfriend too if she's siding with his father. Ask her how she would feel left at school all day without a pad. If she seriously says it's fine then she's either super toxic and doesn't care about your little sister (night be one of those people who think siblings who don't hate each other must be sleeping together) or she's been abused herself and grew up thinking basic hygiene products are a luxury she shouldn't expect. (It could also be the neutral she grew up very poor, using tissue paper and the like, but that still doesn't account for the zero lack of empathy)

[@benjie128]

Sounded like she was trying to contact her husband to keep in contact with her son, and the husband refused. She basically went for treatment. And then the husband refused to let her back and probably only relented bc courts would rather people make deals so he can show he made a good faith effort. I'd bet he'll remove all access as soon as he can and restrict all relationship access to the son with that OP. I mean how dare she get treatment so she can be healthy to care for her kid.

[@DemonAngel]

This is what is getting me too. She says she had a lawyer and had been making contact. What Bio Father is doing is manipulation and using the child. If a woman had done this to a man it would be a different judgment.

[@jay_vee96]

This, and the fact that some moms try to seek help and ask for help, but people downplay the seriousness. I feel like I have been begging everyone something is wrong with me, but my family and husband kinda downplays my ppd. Maybe I'm overwhelmed..

[@haleydanielle2998]

@@jay_vee96 reach out for help. There are people in this world who care. I hope you consider it. Good luck hun!

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

Women after birth are treated like SHIT, one of the many reasons why I'm not carrying children ever. Can you imagine being psychotic after 9 months of hormonal shifts and then having thousands of people telling you that you abandoned your child? F no

[@TheDesertFox1940]

@@SilverstreamPJ28 Because she did abandon her child. She left the country. She didn’t just go down the street or stay with the relatives in another town. The husband had no idea if she would be back and, when she wanted back in, whether she would actually stay this time. If you need to seek treatment, that’s perfectly fine, but don’t expect the world to stop for you if you decide to drop all your responsibilities. You and other commenters have exhibited no sympathy towards the father, who not only had his partner leave to another country, but was left to pick up the pieces and care for a newborn all on his own.

[@darlieoneeleven]

Bathroom: This is a form of control. Divorce him. He is a narcissist. Been there done that.

[@imissmygoats298]

Bathroom barger; ABUSE! My ex hub did this to exert his control and to keep me 'unsettled' if u can't ever relax for even a moment...

[@sharonconnolly3820]

Privacy, tempting to announce when you have company that hubby has to go to.potty with you because you can't be trusted. While dragging him with me. If he isn't mortified leave him no option no divorce no woman deserves this disrespect. Thirty years of marriage my husband never treated me so disrespectfully.

[@carolroberts4614]

No, even my ex didn't think of that one!

[@dingleberryjones1012]

story#1 you're a rockstar for being mature and rational and helping your sis out. males in general need to learn from this post - F'ing mouthbreathers

[@yaff1851]

When you don’t want to be involved in your daughter’s first period, i.e. wash stained bedsheets and other laundry, answer any questions she may ask you, and buy period products, then don’t procreate. The only aspect where I can see where OP’s father is coming from: When it comes to the talk or choosing the right products, I passed this to my wife since I didn’t want to mansplain my daughter’s own body to her. Similarly, I suppose teaching my son how to shave will be my job. [edited for wording]

[@shammydammy2610]

So abandon her because she's a girl?

[@yaff1851]

@@shammydammy2610 I don’t really understand how you come to that conclusion. Not insisting to do one very specific task that my wife can do better isn’t abandonment. Neither is pointing out that the only way to not have parental responsibility is not being a parent. What do you think I was saying?

[@shammydammy2610]

@@yaff1851 "Don't father a daughter." This wasn't a 'in this one particular situation' statement. It was a blanket statement. Don't father a daughter. And how can one avoid fathering their daughter? By either not having one in the first place...either through the roll of the genetic dice or by not fathering those you may have sired.

[@yaff1851]

@@shammydammy2610 The only way to avoid fathering a daughter is not fathering a child at all. Abandonment isn’t a form of avoiding fathering since you can only abandon a child that has in fact been fathered. This my confusion about how ‘not fathering’ connects to abandonment. ‘One specific task’ referred to the period talk.

[@shammydammy2610]

@@yaff1851 Ah. I believe I see the issue. You're using 'fathering' in only one aspect of the word's meaning, as in to sire. I'm using it in a different meaning, as in a male actively parenting his child as a father, the male version of mothering.

[@ScarabD]

12:40 To quote Pratchett: “Satire is meant to ridicule power. If you are laughing at people who are hurting, it's not satire, it's bullying.”

[@ladyv5655]

I was on vacation with my dad and brothers when I had my first period. My dad handled the situation like a superstar, much to my mother's chagrin. I count my blessings that my dad was not like the OP's dad.

[@cynicalminion]

man-child is right. a) despite the involvement of the reproductive system, it's physical health, not "sexual health", and b) just by outlining THIS story, you've given us all a pretty good idea of what one of the main reasons your parents got divorced probably is... i'm entirely on OP's side here, but part of me REALLY wants to know what the man-child's fiancee has to say, if she even knows what it was all about...

[@itsjustmaddisen]

The father sounds foolish and part of me wants OP to say “you’re right. You’re not a man child you’re a straight up cunt.”

[@tayganroberts5098]

So OPs wife unilaterally decides shes done with having a career and wants to be a SAHM. She doesn't discuss this with OP. Op now has to be okay with that because "childcare is expensive." Are they really saving money when OPs wife *isn't contributing any* ? And Op, being the sole income earner, cancels 2/5 streaming services that aren't kid/family, keeps one FOR HIMSELF BECAUSE HE PAYS FOR IT, and he's still the asshole because "she's got shows on it" ? Remember when women were saying how easy it is to look after kids and its CRAZY how men can't do it, but now? Those comments are an embarrassing take on that story. He works and is the only one to bring in money. How dare anybody tell him his wife gets more of a say on how it is spent when she earned exactly 0% of it.

[@tonemaster4608]

Exactly, not to mention food for kids isn't cheap, and nowadays there are off brand apps for free watching, so she isn't actually affected as much as she thinks she is

[@catking1059]

@38:31: what happens online is real life. My family used to espouse transphobic beliefs on Facebook, I’m trans. I went low contact for 5 years, made contact this year, many of them have noticed my absence and realize the hurt they caused, they don’t post stuff like that anymore and I’m giving them a chance to show change

[@tvdsje]

I hope they won't disappoint you

[@Squirreltasticqueen]

To the first one. She got help and was cleared. And even if she hadn't it doesn't mean the parent that has custody is doing a great job just FYI. On to this specific situation however: There Def would have to be more evidence than what was provided before you should say he's a bad dad but also if the kid wants to spend more time it's good to be flexible. Tiny bit of an asshole on the dad's part but shes more of an asshole for saying he's a bad dad over what might just be a scheduling problem at that moment. A better way to go about it is "son is getting used to me I hope he can have more time with me in a few weeks" so everyone can schedule it. Single parents have to balance a lot of things but asking for more time in advanced is responsible.

[@kristinwiebold2433]

Don't get how wife and inlaws think that Austin saying those mean things to his cousin is just joking.

[@kensprivateinvestigation2128]

Story 2: NTA, I am a newly single father to 2 girls. My ex wife worked insane overtime the last 2 years and was never home. (5x16hour days) the few days she was off she was either asleep or going for drinks with her friends. My oldest (11)started her period this year and was basically alone trying to figure out what all she needed. One of the things I did was started a calendar to track when she will get it. This way i know when to make sure she has not only enough pads but that she has some with her when it's close to starting. Someone in my ex's family told her to completely keep me out it and not let me know when it starts. So a few times I have found her sitting and bleeding threw her pants because she ran out and was told not to tell me. Now that we finalized divorced and living separately it's gotten alot better as she lives with me for the majority of the time.

[@lrock48]

That's basically child neglect by your ex, you should've gotten full custody....

[@projectjupiter5523]

this is a year late but you sound like such a brilliant dad and your daughters are so lucky to have a father who is so understanding and so invested in making sure that they're comfortable. needless to say, whoever the in law who told your daughter to keep her cycle a secret and suffer in silence without supplies is very, very wrong and the fact that you were able to notice this and undo the embarrassment that she was taught to feel about it speaks volumes about the strong trust and close bond that you have with your kids. i wish you guys nothing but the best and thank you so so much for putting in the work to be the best father that you can be. parenting can be a thankless job at times, especially when kids enter their teens and yet able to realise how much you care but please know that even if you disagree over chores and curfews from time to time, that any rough patch can be overcome by the incredible love you have for your daughters and they are so lucky to have you as their dad, just as you are so lucky to have them as your kids ❤

[@kensprivateinvestigation2128]

@@projectjupiter5523 things have gotten a lot better. Especially with the schools. She had 2 bleed throughs at school because she wasn't tracking it and got caught without pads at school. I got dirty looks from some of the school staff because I was the one she called to show up instead of her mother. I don't remember the entirety of my original comment so I could be repeating, but her mother refused to talk to her about periods because in her words " I haven't had a period in 10 years, what help would I be?" Her mother has since stepped up some, but I feel the only reason is because she realized the guy she cheated with didn't actually want to be with her and was only saying what she wanted to hear to get in her pants. So now the kids are the only company she has regularly.

[@sbh2888]

Austin is “the golden child”. What I want to know is, how did the bullied cousin react? Where were his parents? Isn’t this child also a grandkid? OP is great, but all the adults suck so bad. They have condoned this for years, and I think they are just ugly people. He won’t look at yoh the same? Good! I hope he looks at you with awe and respect for giving a shit about what kind of person he turns out to be. And if the bullying was no big deal, then what is the big deal on being called out on it?

[@adambartlett114]

Just to be clear, just because the doctors cleared her, does not mean she is safe or ready to resume parenting. Even if fully cured, it's entirely possible for return of symptoms (no matter what the doctors think). Especially during periods of reunification, moreso if there's any hiccups in the process of reunification. While ideally, if mom can successfully be reunified with the kid, that's for the best; but it can never come at risk for the kid. This is always going to be a long, slow, drawn out, difficult road to travel & it can't be made easier, only infinitely harder. So the op is in the wrong, hopefully they learn from this.

[@angeleyesgreen1586]

Locked bathroom story: he probably thinks OP's cheating or something. I personally would separate for a while. I couldn't deal with that level of crazy.

[@candiebarr6745]

In the one, why do I feel like the child was poisoned?

[@dianakosianka5344]

Which one?

[@candiebarr6745]

@@dianakosianka5344 the one where the girl died from cardiac arrest after complaining about an upset stomach and the mother refuses to speak to the father. Poisoning can upset the stomach, depending on what it was could cause cardiac arrest, and the kid dying would mean the mother would have no reason left to have anything to do with the kids father

[@dianakosianka5344]

@@candiebarr6745 I don't think she killed her daughter. Even if she hated her ex husband, that is absolutely insane and extreme. There's no way she would have poisoned her

[@joaolima7131]

@@dianakosianka5344 you would be surprised, by how many parents kill their child to spite their exes, in my country is quite common, recently a mother and her husband (not the father) were arrested for killing her son, the bio father was devastated.

[@candiebarr6745]

@@dianakosianka5344 it's actually quite common. The mother usually has some kind of mental health issue and there are apparently 5 main reasons. Out of "love" (parent thinks it's in their best interest, or they're suicidal and don't want to leave the kid alone for example), delusions (God told them to or they think their child is a Demon are the most common ones I've heard of), accidental (maunchausen by proxy, neglect/abuse), they don't want the kid, and yes, even revenge against an (ex)spouse. I'm sure you've heard of some of them?

[@naturalPaths]

Re: ‘Guy who married in.’ OP NTA When bullying goes on right under OPs nose, he Is involved.

[@rustym40]

Earrings for babies. My mother decided to wait until I was close to turning 16 to ask if I wanted my ears pierced for my Birthday. I took my time to decide and told her yes. She told me that she wanted me to make the decision about it.

[@cult_of_odin]

I told my daughters when they are old enough to decide and able to take care of them we will get them done. My issue is 90% of people I see scream about earrings for babies don't mind to kutilate their sons irreversibly.

[@piiinkDeluxe]

100% agree! I don't have my ears pierced as a woman and I'm happy my parents never did it to me. It's permanently altering the body which should only be decided by the person themself.

[@mikimishisa]

Yeah but that depends on every parent tho my culture does it young and I appreciate it.

[@mandi8345]

re: prenup. prenups also covers if she dies. it can protect him from the family taking everything too. brains are messy things, who knows what anyone will do. prenups are for potential eventualities. if hes a good guy, not gonna cheat, than buck up and sign. also, he has the option to add riders for anything she does. prenups ARE NOT meant to be one sided. period. those two need to grow up. i dont see that marriage lasting beyond the next housing bubble....

[@sbh2888]

Family don’t come to wedding because of pregnancy: Don’t let them in her life! You now know that they will abandon her if she does anything they don’t like! They are horrible.

[@abbie_joan]

lol all the commenters in that strawberry story are just bogus...he has the right to not invite someone for whatever reason and maybe he genuinely wants that theme assuming he's a malicious bully is just proving y'all are entitled as fuck for saying "he deserves to be invited regardless of his health risk" and "you should cater to this random kid instead of the one who's having the party" get real it doesn't matter why he's not invited if the birthday boy doesn't want him there but is trying not to hurt his feelings then that's ok too.

[@kibablade2642]

"Not inviting my sister to my wedding": Be the bigger person?!?! I HATE this phrase with a passion when my mom tells me this anytime there's turmoil bt my younger brother and I. Another favorite sentence of hers is "Der klügere gieb nach" (that's German for "The smarter one will yield"). Have come to the conclusion that it's always people that 1) either are the younger siblings that have always gotten everyone to accommodate all their ish...or 2) they're an only child. OP is WAAAAAY more patient with her sister bs than I could ever be in my life with my brother. The entitlement of the sister baffles me and am even more baffled by their mom for allowing sisters behavior ALL this time. NTA.

[@RevWarRev]

Story 1: Not only TA, but foolish, too. OP's hubs has the power, and she lashes out at the ONE person who can give her access to her son. And OP hasn't offered any reason Ex isnt a good father than her limited access to her child. Much is missing here - is there a therapist involved? Was hubs abusive? So many questions! It isn't OP's fault she suffered postpartum psychosis. But she has the responsibility to do what is best for her child now. Lashing out at her husband is not in her child's best interest, or her's.

[@denisa_the_jedi]

How is she TA? The child wanted more time with OP, would it hurt to leave him a few more minutes with her and the nanny, or couldn't he have stayed a bit more? Her mental illness is no longer a problem. The dude ought to be more understanding and have more empathy, which he clearly lacks by not caring about her and their child's feelings, and taking the kid away because he can. The father is clearly the stupid AH here.

[@RevWarRev]

Does he lack empathy? Maybe. But his first concern has to be thier child. We only have OP's interp that the child was crying because he wanted more time with her. Just as likely he could have been stressed or tired or overstimulated or just wanted to play. She has been out of the child's life for years, by her own admission. Her judgement on why their child was crying may not be accurate at all. So he may HAVE been putting the child he's cared for during OP's absence first. And if there's a court order Dad's empathy and compassion matter not. He risks custody if he violates a court order or even a psycologist's recommendation. OP may be telling the absolute utter truth about the encounter. But that doesn't mean Dad isn't a good parent. Her opinion isn't evidence. But what if OP is shading the truth, even a bit? And it doesn't change that getting in Dad's face and calling names is foolish if she wants more access to THEIR child. Also looks bad to the courts if they take it as evidence she isn't as stable as she claims, or as evidence she won't cooperate and coparent well with Dad.

[@Splatoon_Kirby]

@@RevWarRev Only thing is, she could of been back 10 months after leaving for treatment and the husband refused. He could of started this whole process of reconnecting back way sooner. I can understand concern but the easiest way would be for him to request her to come over and provide the documented evidence the doctors have confirmed her treatment a success. Now with the courts involved both are going to be spending even more money fighting each other rather then both focusing on whats best for their child.

[@RevWarRev]

@@Splatoon_Kirby OP's illness was not her fault, but she has lashed out at the husband who was left with the sole responsiblilty of raising thier child She said she was in treatment for 10 months and reached out, NOT that docs felt she was ready. And even if her lawyer said s/he was confident she'd get custody, that's what lawyers say... Or did OP just hear what she wanted to hear? We don't know he that he could have started the process. We also don't know if OP was a danger to her son in the depths of her illness. She said 'psychosis' which is much more serious than depression. Women have killed thier child/ren when suffering PPPsychosis - did OP try to hurt her son or herself? Husband sounds protective, and these limits may've been set by the courts out of need. And even were none of that true it was foolish to lash out at the man who has custody. If he really is doing this out of spite this won't make it better, and if he is being protective and following the court's guidance she has made her case worse.

[@tonemaster4608]

I'm gonna be honest, her story sounds fishy, and sounds like she's been saving to take the child away

[@rhondasisco-cleveland2665]

Oooh, I love how people are lecturing OP, who’s wife quit working without his consent about how he has no right to make unilateral financial decisions. I taste strong irony, and it tastes stupid.

[@tonemaster4608]

Exactly

[@68jroche]

Shunned baby: I am an atheist, but even I can acknowledge the downright goodness of teachings ascribed to Jesus. People subverting those teachings are just awful, unctuous hypocrites.

[@lynnw7155]

Yeah; if baby was a "stain" on their reputation, they shouldn't want to be around her. Does the parents getting married make it OK? I'm not up on this fanatical, hurtful, fake-religious stuff.

[@PUNKEYE1]

As an atheist honestly I don't recognize the good teachings of Christianity because they're not good teachings. They teach you to live in fear and to worry about reputations. It's not about love.

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

Story 1: How is she TA? "She didn't specify what unwell means" she had postpartum psychosis, that's extremely serious, and completely out of her control. How dare she get treatment in order to not kill her son and then herself.

[@2swordsramires843]

Postpartum psychosis .. LMAO.. suck it up buttercup

[@bettyquon4602]

She was absent from her child’s life for YEARS (her words) and now attacks the father who has been both mother and father to the child. She is definitely TA and, if she is unable to see that, I question her judgement.

[@2swordsramires843]

@@bettyquon4602 agreed 💯

[@fl9975]

Nono, she aint TA for that. She is TA for the way she spoke to someone who had been a single parent for years. Someone concerned for their child. Someone who's child she already left once. Tell me, Could you trust her in his place? Could you? Could you really? Ffs, in her place I wouldnt even trust myself! And how dare she calling him a bad dad for beeing worried about his child? You said it yourself, she might have killed her son only few months earlier! She can call herself lucky he's leaving their child with her, as she certainly didnt earn it.

[@chicken7805]

Um I don't think u understand

[@pagee7452]

For supporting him and not only that but your husband is a bully and if she doesn't stop it I would suggest that they file a lawsuit against you for harassment and discrimination and bullying

[@taylorlibby7642]

1st Story-Yes, 100% YTA.

[@denisa_the_jedi]

How so?

[@wenwantsmusic3008]

She politely declined to eat. Mother in law flipped out in front of everyone and made a huge issue of it. (She could have talked to her privately later) She thought it was okay to try and harass and embarrass her daughter in law . OP was polite at first. Mil got an answer she didn't like because she demanded it. NTA trying to humiliate someone into eating is not ever okay.

[@als2480]

She went to a dinner party.... why even go then

[@als2480]

like theres nothing actually polite about going to an event for eating and not doing so.

[@demonheart13]

@@als2480 to many, it's just as impolite to not go all together. I know I've been forced to go to lots of family events I didn't want to go to because if the whole family isn't there it must mean they hate the host, unless they couldn't get off work and yeah people check if you were really at work or not. It's so much effort for such petty gossip. Op is the daughter in law, if hubby went by himself, mother in law wouldnt have made a scene but she would have bad mouthed OP to every single person there.

[@als2480]

@@demonheart13 that's a lot of assumptions based on a single event were someone came to a DINNER party you're hosting and refuses to eat your food. Even if not being able to go because you don't feel good is still not seen as rude as the slight of going to an even around eating a meal cooked by the host and refusing to eat

[@DivaBabyTX512]

She's NTA because I don't eat anyone's cooking either. And its very common in AA culture to feel that way. Conversations with my black friends about Potlucks often include the phrase "I don't eat everyone's cooking." We try to be polite about it with other cultures which is why no one responding believed Black People actually say that. WE DO!

[@tennesseedogpack]

That’s scary to think you could have a baby killing mental health issue but somehow get the baby

[@DemonicGoddess]

2 month old ear peirced? WDF? The 2 month old would rip them out or find a way to swallow them?

[@confettiveda2460]

The comments on Story 1 are bananas, acting like OP just decided to go on a two year bender. Like, no, she wasn't in any condition to take care of or be near her baby whether she wanted to or not. And I love that Reddit thinks that court cases are like candy bowls where you can just walk in and demand a new custody agreement. That costs money and, if the ex is as crappy as he sounds in this story, the process can be long and painful (especially since they're still legally married). A whole lot of shoulda-woulda-coulda, but severely missing the "coulda".

[@luvondarox]

32:40 NTA If Family is so pious as to remove themselves from OP's wedding because they could not bring themselves to tarnish their reputations by associating with a woman pregnant out of wedlock, it stands to reason that they should also have the piety to stay tf out of that child's life. The idea that it's acceptable to condemn the mother (and father) but demand to be included in the Happy Fun Joy of Grandchild is abhorrent. They can't have it both ways.

[@muhname6052]

Hindu funeral: yeah OP is a terrible person. OP is suffering but that doesn't excuse hiw she's behaving. The "but its dismemberment" commenter is discounting that she could visit her. He can't. I honestly lost any sympathy for her being cheated on.

[@6XJOKERX]

Hold on, if someone cant take being called a bully then how in the world do they think the burn victim can take all that vitriol

[@kathleenmcfarlane2555]

I don't eat just anyone's cooking is a ghetto black thing. To say it is offensive AF and OP should have known this. I have a coworker from the Caribbean who has this attitude. It is normal in some areas of black culture. My mother would not have stood for it. My father either.

[@Mario-SunshineGalaxy64]

Being a stay at home parent is work, but the issue isn’t about whether it is or isn’t. The issue is the lack of income towards the household, not some bs about OP devaluating his wife’s contribution. Wife could be the best SAHM in the world but doesn’t mean jack shit if there’s no money to buy food, pay bills, pay utilities, etc. and having _five_ streaming services is _wild,_ money is basically being thrown into a sinkhole. Also, if the wife is working _so hard_ then how does she have time to watch five streaming services worth of shows?

[@tonemaster4608]

Yes, thank you, can't be a sahm if there isn't a home cause op couldn't afford it with a single income. This is something that takes time to think about cause they'd need it to prepare for the future

[@angeleyesgreen1586]

Ashes story: Op is the biggest a-hole I've ever heard of. The one I feel for is that poor father

[@tinycrimester]

baby ear piercing debate: would be it be ok to put an adult into a submission hold and give them a piercing they didn't ask for? NO??? piercing children's ears is child abuse and assault.

[@sapphicgeek24]

I can't blame the mother in S1 for getting help for her mental health issues. That's better for them all than mom being fucking nuts. That said, she's the YA for attacking the husband.

[@luvondarox]

24:00 "Checking in" on OP going to the bathroom? After _telling_ him that she was going to the bathroom? What a controlling creep. Is he actually looking for her to ask permission to pee or something?

[@ErisstheGoddessofmanhwas]

Ashes story YTA .For some reason the child come back alive from Russia but died in India . I bet the child had a problem and Op didn't even go to hospitals for a regular check .Neglecting the child case her death .I don't care people saying it was Indian tradition or culture. This child had 2 culture inside of her , not only Indian .I hope Op always remember that the child died in her care .

[@tonemaster4608]

Now that you mention it, I bet there were more signs the op ignored, now I hate her even more, almost as much as the fake ash story

[@littlegreycat]

Give Austin a non apology. I’m sorry you were offended by my words.

[@willj24]

I love how listening and not reading along sometimes leads to unintended hilarity. I was really wondering how “My wife and I have children, three male and one and a half female” worked out and why no one was concerned about the half child… In retrospect, I imagine it was actually “My wife and I have children, (3)M and (1.5)F”

[@carolroberts4614]

I quite often have to go back and re-read when there's a long list of people and ages!

[@celestiafanforever]

the period story: I live in a family where my sister will joke about hurting a man if they hurt either mine or my little sister's feelings, trust me it's all just a joke she would never fall through with it however she's a VERY protective sister, but not only that but my dad, the only full grown man in the house besides my two young nephews will always make sure that me, my older sister cause she and her two sons live with us, and our mom have what we need when that time of the month comes around.

[@bonefetcherbrimley7740]

Asher story at about 20 minutes in: Op is an ass. Sure, ex cheated, but that was still his kid. Why does she get to decide how the body is handled? Also isn't the ganjes river full of raw sewage? Why would anyone put their kids ashes in that. Religion or no, that's gross.

[@rhondasisco-cleveland2665]

OP’s mum has never heard of an electric blanket?

[@Amelia073]

One case of food poisoning isn’t childhood trauma. People are overusing that phrase so much until it means nothing.

[@DespairDoctor]

I don't see a problem with not specifying that OPs stepmother is his stepmother and just calling her his mother, if anything, the others were being racist for assuming she can't be his mother and had to be the hired help.

[@heatherweir8726]

Anytime someone says be the bigger person. The response should be. You mean be a doormat.

[@kskidspastor]

The prenup story… if you have a contract with your sister, laying out what happens if a business partner passes, you can protect your business. We own a business and we have a contract in place for the partners. We have life insurance policies on each owner, so that if one passes, their part of the business is bought out and the partner’s family gets compensated. They do not retain part of the business.

[@princesssunshine874]

OP please get a Will set up. If something happens to you, you do not want your daughter to be raised by these abusive people.

[@str4yk1dsw0rldd0minati0n]

With the earring one OP is 100% NTA, my mum made it extremely clear she doesn’t want my ears pierced until I’m older (about 13) and my nan didn’t listen and went to get them done (I did say I wanted them but I was like 6 and only wanted them cause my ‘friends’ had them) and not long after I was in the hospital cause my ear closed over the backing and I was stuck in the hospital all night with laughing gas so a doctor could pull it out and was extremely close to having to get surgery done

[@VergilTheLegendaryDarkSlayer]

Story 3 NTA I would've encouraged Austin's cousin to punch Austin in the face as hard as he can then do nothing saying "boys will be boys" then ask Austin "how does it feel being put in your place"

[@emileeweir7773]

That one about not eating the MIL's cooking: I would have been N T A. When I get extremely stressed, I have a hard time eating. Trying to force food through the knot in my throat is painful, and I often can't even look at food. Point is, there are sometimes genuine reasons not to eat someone else's cooking. The reasoning and the way OP handled the situation makes it YTA. It was disrespectful, plain and simple.

[@als2480]

I feel like going to a dinner party you wont eat at is rude without preplanned accomadations. Like it would be one thing if they had gone over to hang out and stayed a little late and in laws served food, then I would say NTA, but everything about this is assholery.

[@fandomfan2800]

nah

[@princesssunshine874]

I would just ask the kids mom to bring a separate small cake that isn't strawberry.

That first one, all we have is OP's word, for all we know she could of lied the whole way, heck several things in her story sound off. Like getting free treatment in the UK, that is fine, but the fact she said "So I could save money to fight a court case" implies she didn't go purely for health care but to gather money to take the kid away from the father fully. Same with her wanting "custody" not 50/50 custody, just Custody. I have to wonder if she ever got treatment or got some dodgy fake treatment crap, which also how is the father to know if she was cleared by the doctors in another country? He cannot access her files or even have a doctor tell her it is okay, especially given it is in another country too. Too many things seem off about OP's story, it seems concerning, like if she got custody she would flee to the UK and never let their son see the father again. Even some things come off as she is angry that the father DARE get custody of the child even though she had a series condition that has resulted in babies being murdered. I just think there is some malice/vindictiveness going on, OP is clearly wanting to hurt OP for what he did, but what he did was the right thing to do!

[@68jroche]

Teasing cousin: Will it be too late when Sam loosens OPs husband's teeth? It's just his personality is like saying I know my husband is nasty, but because I am not willing to tackle it, you should just put up and shut up.

[@sbh2888]

Saying it’s his personality means his personality is bullying. My guess is no one else stood up to them because they are afraid of becoming the butt of his jokes too. And why does OP think bullying online is better than bullying in person? It just shows how more of a coward he is! Of course this bitch is posting “Be kind.” On Facebook. That’s exactly the top of entitled, mean spirited fake person she is.

[@piiinkDeluxe]

1:12:00 wife said they were manipulative. They still are manipulative towards him and don't respect boundaries by constantly begging. SIL has those tendencies as well. So red flags that they haven't actually changed. NTA

[@lightwork11]

To the op whose wife cut contact with her family. I hope he tells his daughter what her mother said and did, her mother's family could possibly try to establish contact with the daughter later when she's older. She needs enough information so that she avoids getting mixed up with her mother's toxic family.

[@livewellwitheds6885]

story 3- this isnt teasing, its bullying which is never okay. why is bullying okay simply because "family" ?? it makes no sense. bullying for any reason is wrong, but the fact the "teasing" is over a burn scar makes this so much worse. hopefully op calling out his own step son [in public] will straighten him out. op is a good man. also an apology isnt enough- the bullying has to stop. has has NOTHING to apologize for. the entire family is just weird.

[@beastshawnee]

Stay at home mom’s husband should have had a vasectomy if he didn’t want the infant/babies to have a full time mom. BUT everyone is ignoring the fact that she could a small crafting business income which she could do at home and sell from home. Also just cancel all the streaming services. All can go.

[@Nyarlathotep_Flagg]

How TF is this so hard for everyone? She was 11, she could talk. Why TF was she not asked for her opinion on how to handle her situation? Also dad is a POS, a family tyrant, disgusting.

[@misty4937]

Op..that you for standing up for the cousin with the burn. RED FLAG...do you really want to have a child w the daughter of this AH. Might be time to leave.

[@jemase7931]

Once an adult child moves back in and pays rent, she becomes a tenant. Tenants have a right to do as they please in the space they are paying for.

[@spikesgirl9371]

No they don't. If no lease is signed you have no rights.

[@sadie2melw]

The story of not wanting to eat the MIL's cooking... As soon as she said that she doesn't eat just anyone's food, I said "yep, she's black." I have heard this growing up. We eat food that our family has made (extended as well), but we will ask who made this or that if it was bad. BUT if someone outside of the family cooks, we usually steer clear. Me personally, it's because my mother raised me on true crime and I'm afraid of being poisoned or of getting sick after eating. You don't know how the food was cooked, how clean the dishes were, if they have vermin, if the preparer washed their hands (not rinsed), if they taste from the spoon, etc. When I ate at a work potluck once, I only ate when everyone else went back for seconds. That way I knew the food was safe. And I only got food because I was 7 months pregnant. This IS a cultural thing. It just amazes me that people still do not see African Americans as having a culture. 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@Yeshuah6]

Im not black but have relatively recently been brought into the fold of a mixed race family. And yeah this is very much a thing for us too. Some people are just nasty for no good reason.

[@livewellwitheds6885]

25:25 this is such a weird story. does the husband think privacy, personal space, and boundaries all dissappear when you marry somebody? why is it okay for him to make op uncomfortable [because she needs her personal space respected] but it's such a huge deal when he is "hurt" by her? so much hypocrisy 😂

[@alexyo3822]

The whole him getting full custody takes work (first story) is bs. If the parents are in agreement it's one court date. PPD(post partam depression) so real and scary.

[@GrumpyOldFart2]

She had PPP (Psychosis) which is even scarier. And the second I heard “out of the country” I thought, lessee, USA and her country has free healthcare. Nailed it! Plus that idiot comment about an “unspecified illness”? She said in the beginning she had PPP. Some people can’t read.

[@katieb.1184]

yeah, no, I would be locking the door if someone barged into the bathroom repeatedly

[@BodyLanguageAnalysisInterrogat]

40:00 OP & her husband are awful, narristic, gaslighting bullies. Good for Alla for calling out her hypocrisy and that her husband told his brother he didn't like the abuse/bullying and OP magically dismissed this boundary he tried to set. Alla is a "hothead" LOL 😂 OP and her family sounds toxic, gossipy and just unkind. A big NO thanks! Also writing in the Reddit thinking looking for support shows such a lack of awareness. I am sorry for the environment OP and her husband's family grew up in.. probably toxic, narricistic. If everyone loves teasing, fine. But OP husbands and OP don't respect boundaries. Sounds like covert narricistic behavior & hypocrisy to me too.

[@uljie1967]

My husband bought my products all the time

[@Mysecretmuffinstash]

So did my stepfather. In our house even the dog was a female. He bought what was needed when it was needed and never shamed or embarrassed me or my sister.

[@luvondarox]

38:00 My husband is a cyberbully. I think it's fine because no one fights back and I've been called out for being a hypocrite online myself. Am I a jerk? 🙄 Cyberbullies are worse than irl bullies because they can hide behind their screens and avoid immediate responses that would most likely occur in face-to-face discourse. Husband sounds like one of those people who deserves to get punched some day.

[@anabana538]

Don't eat everyones cooking is something commonly said in AA culture.

[@zashgekido5616]

I think the part that pisses me off about the party story is that there's an expectation that OP's son HAS to compromise on something they want to do for their birthday. Then again I've never spent one with more than 3 friends at a time so I maybe biased there

[@petals3091]

They are not compromising, they will get the strawberry themed party that they want, but op can buy like a cupcake and maybe ask the mother of the child to bring some foods that their child likes so that the kid can at least be with his friends and have fun. Party's aren't all about eating, but the social interaction and playing is also a big party in a child's birthday party

[@TheOneAndOnlyFen]

@@petals3091 The way they talk about the kids allergy makes me think that its not only ingestion but even being near them. So not inviting them is actually the smart thing to do.

[@petals3091]

@@TheOneAndOnlyFen from the post I thought it was only ingestion, but if being near them is also a problem I think op is making the right choice. But there is also a question of when they will eat like will the eat first then play or the opposite? Because if they play first then the kid can come and then leave before the food is brought out, but if they eat first then it's probably safer for him to not be there

[@tayganroberts5098]

@@petals3091 or we can just teach people that you don't always get invited to birthday parties because someone elses birthday isn't about you

[@petals3091]

@@tayganroberts5098 I don't exactly remember the age of op's son if they mentioned it, but if the child is young then understanding that can be hard especially if all your friends are invited. I'm not saying that it was that kid's right to be included or to have the birthday boy change his theme, op asked if they were the ah, and while I don't think that they were, I just feel like they could have asked the parents of the kid with allergies to bring food for their kid. The kids are really good friends and this might throw a wrench in that friendship

[@greendiamondglow]

The comments on the first one are too harsh. Judging her for her health issues is messed up. Still I'm gong with YTA for that story. She has to rebuild the trust, not just because she was ill, but because she was gone for so long. That means respecting boundaries, like when a visit is over, even if the kid is disappointed. I'd be hesitant if I were OP's husband, too. If she has a problem with the set up, she needs to either discuss it like a grown up with her husband, or get it altered legally. Trying to bully or shame her husband into it is the absolute wrong way to go. She didn't give ANY reason why he isn't a good dad except that he refused to bend on the agreed rules for her

[@bricksloth6920]

Dad is a man baby and OP is a good brother and NTA

[@livewellwitheds6885]

13:56 no this was the perfect time & place. I was bullied for years- in Public, at school, around family. and nobody ever said anything. calling out bullying when it is happening is a good intervention & makes the victim feel supported.

[@livewellwitheds6885]

story 1. I hate the idea that postpartum psychosis is the "baby killing" condition. more women with this condition die from suicide than commit violent acts like that. also postpartum psychosis is a mental health condition. blood work cannot prove it

[@vetaroberts3333]

They mistreated there daughter and doesn’t have the right to there grandchild

[@staylor3483]

Recovering catholic here: they boycotted your wedding bc your wife was pregnant.. No! Their boycott was bc the processed heaping loads of 1 of the 7 deadly sin, Pride. They also Judged you & your wife as sinners. Judge not others lest yes be judged. Jesus is the 1 tasked with judging us mortal humans, not sinners. Blessed Be to you & your little family. You have made your peace with the Lord. Have they?