Shame and Complex Trauma - Part 5/6

[@produccionesdebajosrecurso7451]

something I love and apprieciate is that you separate thje christian and the 'scientific' part on your videos and I love that. Im an atheist, but I like that attitude so much that I always stay to the christian part and you know, I believe god loves me :)

[@hautecouture2228]

Protestantism is false teaching . It’s not even a real church. When someone believes in God then he just speaks the truth regardless whether others like to hear this or not. He does not need to separate anything. And btw all modern science is rooted in occultism. The science world is run by freemasons who all worship the devil and practice rituals and jewWish kabbalah

[@trejea1754]

If God loves you then He exists, right?

[@amberfahr5992]

Praise God..this comment was worth watching the series

[@motiveperson143]

Whereby even non Christian we can learn a lot ❤

[@deathuponusalll]

Same here bro ,also an atheist, I appreciate that he separates them so I know when to start skipping forward and sometimes I stay to hear what he has to say. I just wish the algorithm didn’t just show me his video by chance and after watching one it’s been bombarding me with Christian videos all over the place 😬

[@LiuxPaula]

I have a new addiction at it is to your channel. I read so many books, went to psychologist and never was able to understand human behavior and myself more than after watching your videos. I am so so so grateful. I am making a change and being a better human because of you.

[@torasacramento4905]

I hear you! I have been to counselors off and on for YEARS and ALL of them were AMAZED that I already KNEW what my problems were, but they were unable to do anything but "cheer me on" and point me to a few self help books. Not "dissing" them (they did their best with the structure) but Tim is the one counselor I believe has been sent by the SUPREME counselor to help all of His children :)

[@Jlopez2813]

I beleive so too!​@torasacramento4905

[@MiaStayingCreative]

I agree! Isn’t he great?!

[@LookingupforJesus396]

What a gift you are to us who cannot afford therapy! Heartfelt thanks to you, friend💞

[@elifkocabas_]

I've been having therapy for almost a year now and believe me, what this good man says and teaches created more impact on me than months of therapy. Therapy's really good and I stick to it to keep myself on track but mostly I change the subject when I feel uncomfortable, this man says everything I was afraid to hear and now I'm not afraid but eager to hear more from him knowing he describes me :)

[@shadowfax9177]

I realize Ive isolated myself so much, so my shame doesnt get triggered.

[@joelsweeney4024]

I used to do that in my teens and early 20's, but then I totally flipped at 26, then I was obsessive at being an overachiever, and making something of myself. Much better, as it helped me to build priceless foundations, but now it's time for me to overcome the shame I didn't know I was carrying.

[@shadowfax9177]

@@joelsweeney4024 we have the exact opposite life! All the way up until my 30s I was the overachiever/perfectionist with a masters degree and a prestigious career but medicated my shame with pills/alcohol. Now off them, 2 accidents and a chronic illness later I'm having a difficult time coping with the shame unmedicated so I isolate. Didn't even realize shame was the issue until this video. Crazy.

[@joelsweeney4024]

@@shadowfax9177 I knew mine was co-dependence and trauma, but I had no idea it was shame. it really opens up my eyes. So I finally have an opportunity to make change!

[@yveqeshy]

YOU ARE LITERALLY SAVING LIVES WITH THIS MESSAGE TIM FLETCHER. YOU ARE TRULY A BLESSING

[@iw9338]

Yes anger response has become a bad habit. I try & tell myself ' Easy does it.' The world won't end if I make a mistake.

[@adityapanchal5580]

Sir, I don’t have words to thank you and the amount of relief and insight I have learned from your series. It has played a key role in my self healing. I am really grateful that I stumbled upon your content.

[@aaa-e5g]

Listening to this series is the first time I've ever understood why I struggled so much with my drinking and constant self destruction before. It hurts like hell, but I know that I am taking good steps every day... I see the shame constantly in my day now, but I also see the patterns and feel the responses raising their heads and do my best to not act upon them, instead choosing to act on the truth that I do have value. I am going to spend time with my wife and friends tonight, and it might sound absurd to others but I am so f*ing proud of me for that. Thank you for these videos, thank you for helping us to understand our pain and grow from it. I wish that any one of my therapists, counsellors or psychologists had understood what you are revealing to me now... but I am grateful for the knowledge all the same. Also, thank you for keeping the religious section separated, as an atheist I appreciate that you respect and acknowledge that it is not for everyone.

[@d.2110]

I can’t believe how revealing this is. Every word. It was shame all along and I didn’t recognize it as such. People like Tim who explain it like this, so simple and with lists of examples so we -people who never learned to properly feel and name their emotions- can RECOGNIZE ourselves are even more important than the therapists we visit to heal it. No therapist ever told me anything about 90% of all that’s on this channel, and they were pretty good. They didn’t see all this. Thank you so much Tim, I keep listening to everything (even sometimes bits of the religious parts) and I still don’t even know who you are.

[@joelsweeney4024]

Therapists Ive seen have broken the surface level, but never much further that that. I learnt about attachment theory, and that I had to learn to be more confident, but it was the how, and the depth of WHY I was the way I was that this has revealed to me. Tim Fletcher is truly a blessing, something Ive prayed to God for very intently.

[@777hendrix]

i been caught in a vicious circle of shame all my life. it's over

[@ndndhhhhk1362]

RIP ☹️

[@shinkamui]

your resources have been so good to me. Im in therapy and im working on it, but for the rough weeks, i come back here in between therapy sessions as a way to keep myself aware, and prompt me to write about it and not just go into avoidance and as a non-christian, i appreciate so much that you separated it as a thing post-lecture. I feel actually freer to enjoy the christian segment and follow it with a nice sense of curiosity without fear of it being like a pushed agenda, since everything is so clear and well adressed. Thank you not only for these talks but also for the thoughtful way you went about them

[@LittleDezzyRocks]

Every time I hear anything about helping myself out of my toxic Shame my immediate thought is... 'but who cares? ' that's how I know something's wrong

[@blingschlingersjewelry]

You care!!! 💞💗💞

[@RisetoThriveMotivation447]

My God bless this man I was about to give up on life but this give s me hope. Thank you

[@simplypositiveme]

I'm struggling terribly and this helped me quite a bit. 😮😮😮😮

[@Sadbuttrue-ThatSwedishGirl]

❤❤❤

[@joelsweeney4024]

Glad to hear that sister. Keep it up! I feel the same way.

[@mfetterelli]

Adding religion to a person troubled with toxic shame is adding fuel to the fire. The first place I learned how worthless I was in church.

[@SaraSundgren-p2f]

Toxic shame and guilt w religious judgemental abuse is a living hell and how you kill steal and destroy- Satan teamwork w evil twist everything of love, grace and mercy and Jesu heart...

[@nadineo1597]

The devil works inside some churches and denominations. But Many people have been radically healed and changed by their meeting of Jesus in church. That's like saying'food is dangerous' because you got food poisoning once. 😅

[@maggiesalle2256]

Church people did that to me too. I didn't know that it was wrong until my parents were diagnosed by my therapist (after a 2-hour session) as narcissists. The church shames as much as narcissistic parents. Jesus came to take away shame that the church spreads around.

[@toliveischrist950]

I’m sorry that happened to you. Jesus is God and is a person not a religion. Follow and trust Jesus, not people or a religion who may misrepresent him.

[@Iwearpink4mom]

@mfetterelli I get it, take what you can to help you move on and leave the rest. Many have been mishandled by church members, but the goal is to learn and become better never bitter. Your worth the tools to release yourself from their judgment, journey well ✨️

[@mike110111]

I can't believe this is not viewed more, this series is incredible. It feels like this is the primary issue of our times (though maybe I'm just projecting ...)

[@sebastienmorand2479]

I agree. This 6-week serie is key stone of so my problems people are facing.

[@daaz4335]

Thank you so much for the highly detailed, relatable and free information about such an overlooked and dangerous topic!

[@bmxt939]

My mom didn't need the subtle signs, she just said "Shame on you" or "you should be ashamed". :D

[@annamitchell8489]

Or “what’s wrong with you?!!”

[@monacaensam9465]

And this can also go to a ‘self-defense’ mode of “I will do it All myself” - do everything - because ‘needing help’ means I am weak or incapable.. and then Shame Also using Please or Thank You illicit shame .. again because of self-perceived ‘weakness’

[@mcmurmies]

Wow! You are speaking to me. 😢thank u for this. Shame sums up a lot of what I feel everyday for the smallest things yes due To my upbringing with my dysfunctional family dynamic. I realize I can rewire my brain. I’m in tears because I’m so grateful for you that this isnt the way that I’m supposed to feel and it’s such an ugly feeling. I’m so thankful for you and your scientific approach and the Christian approach. I love it all❤

[@jennypitts8465]

Thank you so much for this series. It is beyond helpful. I started this one feeling pretty low. The hope you speak especially the the end - of being of service to God in whatever the Divine chooses to use me - has left me much less depressed and more hopeful. I have already done so much work and walked through so much Darkness. I am trusting Source to carry me. I choose Trust. Thank you again 🙏🏼💫

[@LololoLubago]

Tim Fletcher is such a wonderful person and teacher! Thank you so much!❤️

[@louisecampbell2628]

If shame was a liquid I would be soaked in it. That is how "shame based" I am. 😢😢😢

[@nannue]

It get less shameful and became courage soon. Keep healing, accepting and letting go.

[@jessicas1918]

But it's a win that you are recognizing it all❤

[@carolburnette2019]

Same

[@zoegreensall8441]

What a legend. Wonderful explanations using examples to show the way the brain adapts and with humour too. Makes me feel embraced as part of a special society lol!

[@Throwawyy]

Ive always felt shame for making mistakes and disappointing my parents, so i hid that from them and carried the shame. They did not know how to acknowledge my mistakes without dismissing them and over time its made me feel abandoned and that im unlovable to them and every one. Ive coped with porn and alcohol to escape from feeling inadequate to others.

[@arjulala]

Tim you are incredible, I am moved beyond words, at your insight, no modern day psychologist, therapist, compares.

[@luciamulligan]

little 8 year old Miriam saved her own people by being such a good bigger sister!!

[@gardenbee1238]

Thank you, every word you say is validating. This is a safe space, you are protective 👍🏽

[@SuperChurch777]

Thank you so much. I am so thankful to God for this message and also to your mother Fletcher for being so an important person in your life. This message is healing to my life. May God continue to bless you.

[@amberfahr5992]

Why do no therapists in my area understand this?!!

[@bloggerty-schmoo2698]

Therapists are really narcissists who get paid for it.

[@mancubthescrub]

They have unresolved shame?

[@Yousually_Me]

Paycheck maybe?

[@9000ck]

i have a therapist who understands this. not everyone is shame afflicted though.

[@Fdan36]

​@@9000ck well what makes you say the latter part of your statement?

[@Cameron-qm6yp]

So sorry to hear about your mother. She sounded very humble. You are a great teacher and speaker and I'm sure she was very proud of you. Thank you for all these videos. They really make sense.

[@vincentconnell1283]

Due to the painful events of the past two months, shame really showed up like an unexpected tsunami. It started 2 months ago with a harsh criticism after I really went all out to serve others on a retreat weekend. It started a surprisingly painful emotional response. This was shortly followed by a negative job situation which really made me look stupid. This was then followed by a serious false allegation from my Landlord. I have not been the same since. I've been successfully in recovery for 2 and a half years. I've actually had panic attacks and even complete meltdowns which seemed. Be be a thing of the past. I even started hitting myself out of exasperation. I came very close to drinking put if desperation. My recovery has been seriously compromised, but in spite of it all, I'm still trying in spite of it all. I still feel demoralized, and dehumanized

[@MaritRonning777]

im so blessed to hear this. i take it as a proof of Gods love...

[@irisvanderveen1033]

Thank you so much. It touches me deep inside! Little note: there is actually a bible text that says that Amram and Jochebed are the parents of Moses, ex 6:20.

[@TracyNewton-q3b]

Thank you, i read that chapter and verse, so glad you passed that on 🙏🏼

[@MaryAnnFriesen]

Appreciate all the biblical illustrations...most of all the hope for shame based people....like myself.Thankyou

[@oneldelorbe1413]

I can’t get myself to believe in God because of the stuff I went through but I do enjoy this.

[@MC615er]

I started with part 4. So far, amazing. Thank you for posting this here - I am hopeful for the future and “healing”. Sincerely

[@polarisjustdothework2258]

You're talking about emotional disregulation.... And if we grow up in chaos with no role models teaching us how to grow into our emotions, this is what happens; it is not our fault. Yet it is still our responsibility to heal or fix it.

[@KJ-pu8dw]

Shame kills

[@maritaandersson9394]

I have complex ptsd and i have a lot of anger .And isolation for many year

[@carolburnette2019]

Prayers going your way, I am the same.

[@maritaandersson9394]

Why do i avoid pepole so much .And i have do that after many years of been so social .I chrasd and go 7 years psykolog and since a avoid awerithing ?

[@joeschmo7957]

Tim, I'm here to tell you. Your mom was a great gal and a good girl! What a revelation.

[@zeniasaldanha3948]

Thank you. I found these talks so useful. God bless you.

[@AbdulrhmanAlhalabi]

It crazy how shame drag you back to his game.

[@Muttan007]

Thank you so much for every video you share ❤️ I have been searching for this information all my life. No one have ever taught this to me and I am very grateful for this information. Thank you for sharing your amazing competence! ❤️🙏

[@LR-yu3mx]

Thank you... What you taught here is very valuable to me By teaching little gr 1 children I could spread the Gospel by hopefully, in a loving way, taught little ones about God. And they responded so heartwarming. They could read, write and do elementary maths when 1 had to let them go to the next grade. That was my purpuse.and made me happy

[@mirosDV]

Thank you so much for talking so highly of your mom!!! 🙏

[@mirosDV]

*speaking

[@Meltemteltem22]

You know this work Thanks for your touching explanations that clears feeling shame 🙋🏽‍♀️

[@Yukonandy2000]

I’m in isolation mode. I rarely talk. It just felt like everything people said to me was an attack via their own shame. So I’m in a card game now, and I won’t say much as I feel I reveal the hand I’m dealt. I’m quick to analyze the attacks in my mind. Why people would attack me, what their own shame is. It feels lonely.

[@clarksondarling]

I've been isolating for 5 years with a few days off. I'm suicidal I stay that way and I try not to talk about it. The guilt about telling anyone i Care about what I'm thinking makes it worse.

[@carolburnette2019]

How are you?

[@clarksondarling]

@@carolburnette2019 thank u for asking. I am seeking God and being delivered and I have been out of bed and feeling much relief. I have sought out a womens ministry called mountain movers and they are helping me. I recommend them to anyone who feels they are being oppressed in the way that I was.

[@alhana8293]

I hope you are doing well. Hang in there we can do this. We're on the path to healing and pain is just normal to get to where we need to be. Sending you love and positive vibes ❤

[@drummermylo]

I love this guy so much right now. Thank you Tim!!

[@Pigmyta]

This is freakin' life-saving!!

[@oscarace650]

What a blessing this is!

[@ShalomEntirety1]

Thats was great and absolutely beautiful how you spoke of your Mother. Shalom.

[@sky.2310]

Thanks a ton Dr Tim, Now I understand what psychologist is.

[@timbardawill1293]

Lifetimes of possible time to spend time with you and your pricklee family may be in the best possible way.

[@nasreenkhan9560]

Amazing lecture. Highly appreciate yr professional acumen.

[@Bar_Bar27]

So many stuff bring shame for me. Even just a look, any kind of eye contact can bring shame

[@andriyandriychuk]

22:59 golden

[@blingschlingersjewelry]

You are amazing, thank you for enlightening myself and helping others in their life journey! 💞

[@HumbleHappenings7]

I tend to isolate, but I also have no friends....i have moved so much and kept finding narcissistic people that i locked on...making them unsafe.

[@ts3858]

I have so much shamre of my disability due to CPTSD..😓

[@Joeljoel1111]

These courses really helped. Thank you so much

[@TheNanocat]

He is talking about me!! I thought I reag and heard all there is about the subject. Amazing

[@ElizabethaSara]

Thank you 🙏🏽

[@disko1506]

Thank you for lectures. They are great 👍. But shame eventuality looks incurable. We only understand how it affects our lives, and that’s all. Nothing works. Especially if we know this is a deep belief, not an emotion. So sad and dead ended. 😢

[@maxlantano9076]

Wow this guy always cooking me 😂

[@shadowfax9177]

For real. I feel so exposed and yet relieved I'm not actually a complete idiot.

[@dawnstephanieong6825]

Thanks, Tim, for all your wonderful messages. I've been listening to you for more than a year now. Just want to add that Moses' mother was Jochebed 😊

[@mcmic1212]

I've watched three of his teachings today

[@kathy1001]

Thank you. This information is life changing ❤❤❤❤

[@theodorurhed]

What about anger at the parent who induced all this shameful behavior through neglect? And what was the solution to the triggers? "Just do it anyways?" I should just keep feeling ashamed and put myself in situations where I feel shame and never resort to anger? Never resorting to anger is what has lead me to people please my whole life and not set any boundaries. So difficult to navigate this stuff and understand how I can change

[@ak-cl6im]

We are going in circles, still without any solution

[@shawnaiszak4032]

wish I knew this 30 years ago. We need to teach this stuff in school

[@zahraalshabib-oe5ox]

You're amazing. Thank you so much for sharing these valuable information and eye opening topics and the way you lecture is not boring at all❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@stefaniakonstantinidou981]

I jist wanted yo share this with u. I recently only tralised some " friends " have been disrespecting me. I told them so ( they were ridiculong my faith in God) and they replied i should laugh with how they treat me and not get upset. No talk about them changing what i don t like. I told them this cannot happen and they did not like my boundaries. After i set boundsries i felt guilty about it. Maybe i should not have done it? And i asked God to help me. When i did that infelt a peace and i could see clearly that i had nth to feel guilty anout. He can heal us guys. He s our best friend and our fsther, He exist and He loves us and He can save us and fill the void

[@mgmarius70]

Great Videos Tim HALLELUYAH

[@sll110]

shame, shame, shame, all shames! evils mom, evils family members, everything leads to shame

[@C-Span222]

Thank you!

[@melicyasellshomes]

Thank YOu

[@adelequinn3334]

❤ Amazing so helpful

[@Hello_jo]

This is amazing

[@EnglishFuture-xg1gw]

When it comes to obsessive or negative thoughts about oneself, that come from lies about us or shame inducing words, can ways of treating someone be included. for eg your family treated you like a slave or used you to fight against a relative or ex.

[@Rinana2004-hz1pp]

Thank u so much it was great

[@keeperoftheway2605]

What if you deal with shame but don’t have drug addictions? Then what?

[@RH-ul2bc]

There are other coping behaviors most likely. Look into his cptsd playlists. I dont have drug or alcohol addiction but shame and abandonment seems to play a role for me due to childhood. I hope you find the answers to your questions. Dont stop looking, keep learning. God bless 🙏

[@getnetalemu4427]

Thank you.

[@AbdulrhmanAlhalabi]

First thank you for your great heart and mind. I think also shame may trigger body sensation which is so hard. Also sir I want to subscribe to your online program but I didn't understand what I should buy or how I can get all the modules.

[@pulidobl]

How about being used? Especially by romantic partners/interests?

[@jboyler1]

How can you possibly understand shame so well and then think religion is the cure for shame, rather than the cause of it?

[@astridkessler1708]

Religion in it self is not the cure for shame. But Jesus Christ is. He has come to free from shame and guilt and not to put it on us. He has the ability and love and sensitivity to heal the deepest wounds of our heart and soul through trauma and rejection. Iam experiencing it myself right now and am so thankful. Its about a personal relationship with him, not just a religion. The power of the cross, what Jesus Christ accomplished there. Guilt and shame ist not of God. I hope that you would reach out to him and experience it too.

[@Chris-dt5td]

Shame is not always positively correlated with low self-esteem. Sometimes shame is part of a pernicious game.

[@aprilerickson5433]

Has he done anything geared towards the people around us, to help them understsnd us better?

[@TimFletcher]

Check out his 8-part series on Complex Trauma

[@aprilerickson5433]

@@TimFletcher that wa the first series i started with. I found it extremely helpful, but getting someone else engaged is difficult. A lot of time to invest for "you". Make sense?

[@TimFletcher]

Have you watched the series on the 50 characteristics?

[@Kidsrights-d8w]

I'm sorry about your mom. 😢

[@natalieellis4832]

That was beautiful ending, thank you

[@gulliver7419]

Although I do think it is rude to roll your eyes and most people would feel some hurt.

[@RippleDrop.]

Shame everywhere

[@ogaday4831]

Hi! Part 2/7 and 3/7 from shame is exactly the same video. You post it 2 times the same video. Can you change the mistake? Is important for people.

[@doreenlane2370]

The standard that men are the providers is in the Bible. Children are the future who will become adults

[@GodHelpMe369]

999-trillion oceans of grief - 999-trillion oceans of rage - 999-trillion endless PTSD flashbacks - I CAN NO LONGER BEAR THIS TORTURE I'm dying on the inside he raped my soul. he gave me SEVERE PTSD. SEVERE SEVERE SEVERE!!! and now he's gone. I blocked him. I want to die. how and when will I ever heal from the PTSD flashbacks? nothing more horrific and debilitating and paralyzing than the PTSD flashbacks. the man I revered as my best friend, betrayed and abandoned me, and discarded me like garbage, and replaced me with another. this happened at the start of last year (2023), we're now in 2024, and I'm nowhere near healed. I want to die. I can no longer tolerate the pain. the emotional pain is hell. I hate my life. I am tortured and tormented with every breath I take. RAGE RAGE RAGE I want to die I want to die I want to die I can no longer bear the darkness it consumes me; suffocates me I am drowning oceans of tears the man I revered as my best friend, he raped me, replaced me, discarded me like last week's garbage... ultimate betrayal!! this grief and loneliness... they rape me; torture me; on a soul level my only prayer is for death I'm in hell and I can't find escape God has forsaken me my whole life I've been tortured, bullied, abused, raped all I do is suffer my life is hell SO NOW, IN HOPES TO HEAL, AND TO CHANGE MY LIFE AROUND, I LIVE BY THIS MODUS OPERANDI: When there’s a disagreement, when I need to say YES or when I need to say NO, when I need to state my needs, and ask for them to be met... When I need to create boundaries... There's a possibility and a probability, that someone will inevitably, most likely, be disappointed in me... So I engage in every encounter, interaction, and relationship... In a way that ensures, that the person disappointed in me... NEVER ends up being me! I aim to never repress, never suppress. I aim to never lose a part of myself. Radical honesty only: 100% of the time. Always, all ways.

[@Vjm47Bigpond]

Very intense GodHelpMe. I used to feel like you are now feeling. After 68 years it is getting slowly better. Love to you

[@Yousually_Me]

Seek help, I feel it

[@Sproutgoodnight1161]

Please worship the Most High Elohim.

[@Pamela.B]

Amram & Jochabed were Moses’ parents (Exodus 6:20)

[@Gemisnotmyname]

4:47

[@GodHelpMe369]

AFFIRMATIVE PRAYER 1) I'm in love with myself and my life 2) I'm in love with being alive 3) I'm a magnet for: love, miracles, money, happiness, joy, prosperity, wealth 4) I have total and complete and permanent: FINANCIAL FREEDOM 5) Always and in all ways: I totally and completely and permanently surrender to Jesus 6) I thrive: in my career and in my relationships 7) I am a master alchemist 8) I am world-renowned in my area(s) of expertise 9) I magnetize my ideal and perfect clients to me: easily, constantly, consistently 10) my twin-flame and I are magnetized to each other, we belong together, we are destined to be with one another 11) I am the epitome and the embodiment of perfect vibrant radiant health and wellbeing