How "wrong friendship" can ruin your life

[@NightinGal89]

I know this is about friends, but sometimes the people who block your progress the most are family

[@hotrox2112]

They are unable to set you free of the preconceived box they see you in, and in your changes, they feel threatened by your growth.

[@EMPANAO321]

Yea, I get it if u have a terrible family but people who chose terrible friends are just dangerous and stupid

[@zeze1257]

so true !!

[@han7oee]

@@hotrox2112 damn, never saw it that way, thanks for saying that

[@Puer_luminis]

Absolutely right. I am in my mid twenties and just came to realise that my parents are not the best company for me, because they have wildly different values and priorities in life, but I would feel guilty about not talking to them. They are my parents after all. However, talking to someone because you think you own it to them is not a healthy basis for any relationship. I owned up to my parents and told them about the big disconnect I have been experiencing for a very long time and distanced myself ever since. I feel trough that I reclaimed a huge part of my freedom.

[@Chicoyo21]

It’s insane how I’m cutting off friends and this came out… love u for this thank u so much man

[@shownemoto]

Definitely a sign!

[@laurasusan290]

Same here 🙌

[@hikarujamiemasamiya]

Same haha And mind getting clear

[@savage_girl_07]

Is that Beomgyu on your pp??

[@Chicoyo21]

@@savage_girl_07 yes that’s my bf

[@r_i_v_e_r]

I had a friend group for almost ten years, we met in the 6th grade. I thought they were good friends, and as the years went on I noticed they'd never talk to me unless I talked to them. It was only until last year that I finally had enough, and called them out on how they treated me. It ended abruptly by them blocking me on everything, instead of confronting it. I haven't spoken to really anyone, I kind of try my best to avoid new friendships. I see other people who are 22 as well, and see they have friends or a relationship. I used to envy them, but I realize now it's better to enjoy my own company, than have bad friends, or being jealous of others. About 20 minutes ago your channel showed up in my feed about the samurai's philosophies, and that helped me look at things with a better perspective than before. I thank you for making these, they will certainly help me out with how my life has been over the last few years.

[@shownemoto]

It can be difficult to start making new friends, but trust me there are great people out there. take time and learn how to communicate with people and how to connect with others. It is a great skill to have! Im glad you enjoy my contents!

[@gurcharansingh1811]

Pp⁰

[@bobbylacomb7394]

I’ve been through that in a way. I can safely say I got 1 good friend. We push each other and going out for a run later today. Quality over quantity

[@Cuponoodles]

I have also been in that situation. That person used to be my best friend. It took me some time to realize and accept the fact that I was the only one trying and reaching out to them. It was very hard for me to get through but I got through it. Sometimes I still feel hurt thinking about that friendship but that's a part of the healing process I guess. Better things await, my friend! Good luck to you!

[@blythetaylor4063]

It gets better with time. The hardest part of life is that under so much social judgment- about where we should be at what time, what we should do when, it’s really easy to mold our existence around the expectations others have of us, around shame, around over compensating, around trying to appear normal, rather than actually take the steps we need (in a realistic, therefor gradual way) to get better, challenge ourselves and grow. The result often won’t be all at once, and it will often lead to ridicule, since as individuals, we are unique enough that most of us won’t fit into the dominant cultural narrative about how people should live. The key is to embark upon this path and forgive the meanness of others, to not close your heart off immediately while still being honest about who you want to spend time with and what you want to do (even if you’re afraid of loneliness) because the right people do show up. And regardless of what others are saying about you and doing around you, as you continue the path of working from within and realistically improving from where you are, and exist from a place of your internal hope rather than negative outside judgment- eventually you are going to start feeling so happy with yourself that you will draw in the right people, and feel pleased not just with your own company but with the pattern of your progress. It won’t all be about the end goal anymore, it will be about enjoying the process you created.

[@rev.jennyosorio7003]

I had to end a friendship of 50 years because she stayed in one chapter all her life. When we get together I do all the talking. I ask her what's new. She say nothing really. How's the family? She answer fine. Our conversations became questions and answers. I was the one that always had to call her or text her. I realized this is not a friendship. I ended it. I have patience but when I became unhappy and frustrated I knew it was time.

[@roseofsharon7551]

Good on you. It can be sad letting go of a friendship you’ve had for so long. We are - at least I was - conditioned to cherish longevity in relationships. But it’s like 2 trains on separate tracks. You can enjoy the view together for awhile but at some point the tracks might diverge. Cherish the memories, bless and move on. I had to part ways with a 30 year friendship, we kept colliding as my outlook had changed. And where it was once fun, supportive and caring, it had become critical, judgmental and devaluing. Letting go of the things I can’t control - like others’ reactions - has allowed them to shift, as well.

[@roseofsharon7551]

@KingSley™ How about a little less “slay” and a little more “slack”.

[@Di00rt]

​@@KingsleyTiDeybrother than what is friendship for? Friendship is one of the biggest joys of life and gives you happiness. You can be all happy by yourself but you'll still need friends.

[@DiamondsRexpensive]

​​​@@KingsleyTiDey Oh zip it basement lurker. We're social animals. We're supposed to have people in our lives and if a person's existence no longer brings you joy, doesn't serve any purpose, and does more harm than good to you, you cut them out.

[@anonme_]

@KingSley™ Sure, friends aren't the "only" source of our joy but they cannot possibly become these soul sucking zombies too, right? Your comment is not very nice or logical. I hope you are going out and finding some happiness too.

[@judehany]

For me, the mistake i made while making friendships is that i rushed calling them my friends, without even getting to really know them or giving enough time to share our beliefs and values, consequently i had to deal with cutting them out of my life, but what was the hardest part is becoming acquaintances after being somehow close. So the lessons i learnt are: 1/that diffrences are good but not in beliefs, values and principles 2/ i dont have to rush into calling someone a friend 3/ it's ok to have many friend groups, with each one of them u do specific activities

[@miatra9480]

i've just went through the same thing. i was too rushed to call them my best friends and as things went by, one of those bffs lied to me saying that im also the bad guy so that her ego can feel at ease avoiding the fact that she is irresponsible and unprofessional. it was a blatant lie and well i had been familiar with her habits of lying (aka mild gaslight) when she was in the wrong but it wasn't any serious matter so i never rly mind. but then she threw me under the bus for her stupid ego, and i knew i couldnt let it slide. we went from close friends, working tgt in every projects, the elite duo that everybody sees as high achievers with incredible team work, to enemies. we weren't as close as best friends but it was something, it was still a friendship that i adore and i always loved us as a duo. our names are always mentioned besides each other but not anymore. i was heartbroken, confused and angry. i felt betrayed. that was my first friendship breakup.

[@FatTonyTheSkipper]

Need something like this right now. Going from a typical British life of drinking/partying since 14-16 years old into mid 20s, everyone in hometown doing same thing, routinely, work all week and party on weekend, I hated it for so long then I ended up moving abroad, hitting gym everyday, meditation, clean diet, combat sports, reading to name a few healthy habits, I started becoming a different person, but now I don't have any friends that are similar to my new life, they all are still doing what I used to do, and when I join the it feels like a step backwards/in the wrong direction. I feel if I keep on my healthy lifestyle ill attract many more blessings so its what I got to do, bit lonely right now though.

[@rissrose3470]

I so relate to this

[@Motherfunctional]

Completely feel the same way

[@debbyshark1596]

The top of the pyramid is much smaller than the bottom..when you elevate..there are always going to be fewer ppl..majority of ppl are not interested in putting in the work that it takes to elevate!! But there are good ppl at the top of the pyramid..just might take you a bit to find and connect..be patient and don't give up!🙏

[@FatTonyTheSkipper]

@@debbyshark1596 I love this thought, thank you

[@bensquires9419]

Exact same story mate, grew up in Surrey so I know what the life is like. partied all throughout my late teens - every now and again today; but like you said every time I go back it’s like I’m going in wrong direction. like I’ve been exposed to truth of this shithole lifestyle & once your exposed you cannot be un-exposed. So you go do your own thing and family/friends/colleagues look at you with raised eyebrows and that’s why people like us go back to the party, because innately we want a tribe. We want to be a part of something. Sounds like you’re in no man’s land like myself. Eventually those people that hold our interests and and values alike will show up bro. Hang in there👊🏻

[@jazzmjm41]

The real lesson is when someone shows you their true colors, believe them .

[@treasureharvey8346]

as someone getting ready to head to university, this was definitely what I needed to hear. I have never really been friend crazy, so I have always assumed that I would have couple of good friends to ride out through university. I know that instead of searching for people, like me, I need to adapt to my environment and look for a group of people I admire, and look up to.

[@shownemoto]

Yes!Hope you find a good friend group!

[@treasureharvey8346]

@@shownemoto omg thank you 🥹

[@dennyahh]

Just keep in mind, not everybody you meet in college will be in your life forever; but you should treat them like they might be. You never know who you're going to run into or need to rely on in the future.

[@khcom8896]

The irony this shows up on my feed. Currently trying to change my environment and cut ppl out who have been toxic and draining the life out of me.

[@normapadro420]

Hello. I was pushed away by people growing up, and as an adult too. I didn't care, because I had so many things to do in my life. I took control of my life. I succeeded in achieving every goal in my life. I never gave up on myself. I kept achieving what I wanted. I'm glad I was pushed away by everybody. I learned a lot about myself. Enjoy yourself.

[@evonne315]

Im 44 and only just learned how having the wrong people in my life and allowing them to be there as "best" friends, "partners" and part of my "community" brought me to financial, emotional and physical ruin. I have incurable chronic illness from stress and was duped out of house and home by a narcissist. My family was no better and unsupportive so I ended up homeless. I learned everyone in my life either was using me or far more shallow a friendship than I understood. My oldbest friend was borderline. I learned I was not her best friend but her "favorite person" which is the term uswd for the person they cling to emotionally for support and use for whatever thier wants and needs for pretending to be a supportive friend in return. Its so valuable to learn this lesson! Were here to serve, not be someone's personal tool.

[@DiamondsRexpensive]

You can't be angry at others when you're the one who signed up to be used by them.

[@chilly4496]

True but also if a friend looked up to me as a person to be able to talk about their problems. There’s no harm in just listening or telling them something that could help them.

[@annastone5624]

@evonne315 I’m so sorry!! Sounds like a very painful journey.. very often the people we give our precious time and love to, simply don’t deserve it and at worst they are deliberately stealing it.

[@psychicbyinternet]

@@DiamondsRexpensive Ewww please don't victim blame. Actually it isn't someone's fault if people are shitty, it's the shitty person's fault. And anyone who makes the victim feel worse than the perpetrator honestly makes me wonder why they are trying to defend the perpetrator so much, it's a little suspicious to me.

[@almeda456]

For a long time, I've surrounded myself with judgmental people because of convenience. I was so insecure. Even though I was against their ways, I stayed because "it was better than being alone". Who knows how many good friends passed me by because of my associates. After many years, I no longer recognize myself. I've adapted to becoming like the people I didn't agree with. After the friendship waned, I felt I sold myself short by being around that. I'm slowly aligning myself to who I want to be. This video was the icing on the cake. Thank you.

[@sysonic917]

As humans we are very prone to being susceptible to influence from the people we surround ourselves with, such as their actions, behaviour and mentality. And because of this I very much preach the idea to choose and surround yourself with the right few congenial people.

[@nabee9823]

Sometimes, we have to accept that not everyone is flying to your destination

[@neranderthal]

Some people can be very talented yet at the same time unconsciously hold you back. I have a close friend of 6+ years and we’re both very passionate artists and aligned in many different things. However, he too frequently sends me his art and his interests as if out of expectation for me to support him, without giving the same interest when I rarely share mine… he never asks about it or asks how I’m doing. I thought I was being a good friend by supporting him, but I realise it’s actually pulling me back because it inadvertently devalues my work, takes up my mental space and diverts me away from my true path. He has had a history of getting a little sad when friends of his have successfully taken the next step and achieved something, as he goes straight into comparison. I’m sad that I have to slowly let him go, I’m afraid of being alone… but this reinforced that it’s necessary if I want to take the next step. Thanks for this and best of luck for those who have to let someone go ❤

[@rfee13]

cutting out drugs had my stoner friends drop like flies haha! but it made me realize its better for me and those friends weren't what i needed.

[@user-uw2vz5fc6r]

I’ve just cut off my whole group of friends for the exact same reasons you described and they literally portrayed me as the bad guy for wanting to surround myself with people who understand me and “align with my vision” as you said

[@user-uw2vz5fc6r]

The struggle tho is that i’m not sure if i’ll ever find a good friend group

[@thenoodletiger1869]

​@@user-uw2vz5fc6rMaybe you have to find good friends and form the friend group by introducing them to each other and hopefully they become friends aswell

[@user-uw2vz5fc6r]

@@thenoodletiger1869 Yes, but i need to find one good friend first

[@orangejuice8881]

mmh I actually feel you though, I feel like I struggle with finding friends too but I sometimes interact with ppl online who share the same interests (on instagram I comment on artists' posts and then become some sort of mutual/ acquaintance after etc) hopefully reaching out to a bunch of people and seeing after a while if they 'stick'/ get along pretty well works, btw you're not a bad person at all for wanting to surround yourself with understanding people; that's the bare minimum for a relationship and I respect u setting boundaries :)

[@user-uw2vz5fc6r]

@@orangejuice8881 Oh yes, i do have a few friends on social media with similar intrests but most of the time i’m too shy to meet them irl cause im convinced that they won’t like me as much as they do on text 🥲

[@EvaWright]

I've had to let go of toxic friendships that I tried to hold on to only to have them hurt or sabotage me or my trust which helped me see the path toward better friendships.

[@RealHousewivesUnlimited]

I’m currently in this space. It’s much more lonely than I ever imagined but I’m seeking better friends, better relationships and better opportunities 🥰

[@ruq_xo]

He’s so fine and he’s speaking factsss

[@skeleton2389]

I KNOW RIGHT LIKE DAMN

[@hey_aaabbb]

I couldn't even imagine how people could change me... (

[@Mahahemingway]

Crazy how this video came at the perfect moment! Thanks for this! On my current healing journey, I’ve been really reflecting on the impact of the people closest to you on your life. Im actively learning to appreciate the bad friendships and what they taught me and also praising those that are bringing me so love and joy. Creating content for my own spiritual and self KZbin channel, has allowed me to love all of those experiences. I hope everyone hear is having a great day 💙

[@shownemoto]

It is very important to appreciate that experience for sure! Keep going!

[@Courtneyp268]

Great video! I’ve learned somewhere that people come into your life for: a reason, a season or for a lifetime. Not everyone in your life is meant to be there forever, which made me realize to let things/people go when they no longer serve or meet your energy. And that’s totally alright. So, I’m not sure I would say, “wrong friendship”, rather, you need to let people go when the time comes to let go. Each has serve what they came to serve in your life and there’s a reason whey they came into your life and that time has come. But it’s wonderful when you meet people who are there for a lifetime, which is so special! Thank you.

[@Charlieseason_16]

TRUE THATS BEAUTIFUL ❤️‼️

[@nocturnerequiem4756]

Cutting friends and actually rethinking my whole life and this video appear... Thank you.

[@jayyyyy2958]

I’ve been friends with my friend group for about 6 years and they were toxic and left me out of a lot of things. It’s crazy because before then I felt fee and social, but by the time I ended the friendship I had to learn myself all over again and I still am. For a long time I felt the need to leave the group but finally I did and I am so happy with my decision but there’s a lot I now have to work on

[@AvneetKaur-dh1rt]

We don't choose our own family but we chose are own friends it is not necessary that every friend is true friend one may be worse than enemies and some may be better than own relatives.Really thankful for sending such a valuable thought,you beautifully said everything.

[@shownemoto]

Exactly! I'm happy that you enjoy my contents!

[@taurusrising1927]

I haven't had friends in 11 years. They always used and literally abused me. (I'm short, and easy to put into a headlock) I realized 11 years ago that I became submissive with my friends. They would say "jump" and I would reply, "How high?" They would say "I can't afford my electric bill this month." And I would reply, "How much do you need?" And give it to them. I never asked them to pay me back. I would give them a ride somewhere if they didn't have one. And never ask for gas money. (I tried asking for gas money once. And I was yelled at and told no. I was put in my place as it were. And didn't step out of line again.) To me, helping friends is what you do. It took me far too long to realize they were using me. I learned at an early age that no one would be friends with me unless I did what they wanted. (Do this for me or I won't be your friend. I can't tell you how many times I heard that in elementary school.) As a teenager and young adult, I learned to be there for my friends without questions. It was a give and take relationship. I was giving and they were taking. As an adult now in my 40's I've learned I don't know how to make and keep friends in a healthy manner. So, it's better for me not have any. I'm actually okay with that. Yeah, the wrong friendships can actually break a person. New subscriber. Love your channel. Keep up the awesome work, please. Thank you for your time and effort.

[@banziimavusotv]

I'm down to only 2 friends in my life. They are healthy for me and that's why they have remained. Everyone else didn't care or appreciate me or they weren't loyal and I deserve good friends cos I'm a good friend. Much love to you.

[@reedmorris8841]

If we cut people out who seem to be on a different energy level than us, then aren't we depriving them of being able to look up to someone who is doing a bit better? Couldn't it be more fulfilling to have a full spectrum of people in our lives that are in different stages? That way we could be a light to people lesser off, while still having others that we can look up to that can be a light to us as well?

[@reedmorris8841]

Or is being cut off a needed catalyst to change and develop ourselves more? I find this video very thought provoking.

[@mAz5798]

I mean I guess I get what he’s trying to say but on the other hand it feels kinda weird to just cut the people out you still have a great connection with even though you might be at different points in your life you still have that bond don’t you? It‘s kinda like saying they’re not good enough for me anymore or I can’t use them to my advantage anymore wich I don’t know if that’s friendship to me because to me it‘s about the bond not how they can bring me forward in life and as soon as I can’t get anything out of them they’re out…I mean I wouldn’t like to be treated that way by a “friend“

[@reedmorris8841]

@@mAz5798 yes thank you. The words I was fumbling for you said so eloquently

[@RelaxCC]

I agree, I don't think we should set that high expectations of others, especially friends. Accept people for who they are and they shall do the same.

[@naufrage0]

I mean it depends. You can usually tell when it’s time to leave it behind. Sometimes those people are actively holding you back because they want you to be at their same level. Bitterness begins, a cloud hangs over the friendship, and this can sometimes go on for years. But sometimes it works out the way you say, where they’re supportive of you and want to see you shine. Those friendships are just as amazing as the ones where they’re on your same level.

[@imbadatpickinganame]

"Show me your friends and ill show you who you will become" whenever i want to see what i might be getting into with a potential friend, i look to their friends

[@hakasehakase]

highschool was the last time I had friends, and during that time I did some really awful things because of pressure. Years later ive learned to choose my friends wisely, im incredibly lonely, but i am now talking to people who I believe in and trust. But it sucks because I constantly live with the consequences of my mistakes

[@mick7922]

I feel that

[@kflecha1]

This is so true 🙌🏽✨ Is important to select your friendships very well because in the difficult time you will know who is your real friend. Love this content ❤ Positive vibes to everybody here ❤

[@shownemoto]

Yes! I'm happy that you enjoed this video!

[@FruitSlider]

Ive been 100% happier after leaving a toixic friendship i was in! Its insane how it can effect you.

[@whizkoochristian5580]

This video and suggestion really came at an important moment in my life. Everything is changing, graduating from college soon, applying for a job, battling bad habits, but what wrecked me just this past saturday was a friendship. We have been friends for 7 years now, and just recently I started taking a liking to her. To me, she is the type of being very reserved and patient, but now she is on the shift to the party life, she confessed that she likes me, but then literally I can't make this shit up, I walk away to get us drinks and when i come back... she is making out with some random dude. Some movie type of stuff, I was sunk right there and there, not because I put too much value on women or so. But because I have always kept them at arm's length due to bad experiences, but moment I decide to trust it just gets sent flying back at me. Things like this made me realize that I always had this thought: "I know they aren't bad people, I know they love me, I know they want the best for me, but why do I feel so lonely around them?" This makes me understand better, we are just not headed on the same direction. I'll heal with time, thank you for your great work and insight, very appreciated!

[@carloko08]

you were friends with that girl for seven years, the years when she was a good girl, "reserved and patient" and you waited all that time to act and now you complain about her becoming a bitch, with all the negative influence that the university has on people's minds? you are a fool, man, you should have learned things more important than your university degree, things like being happy with who you love, for example, good girls, "reserved and patient" almost do not exist these days, you had one of them by your side for seven years and now she's just another ordinary bitch because you didn't act, please You already know the changes you have to make to your life, stop going to your church because churches are breeding grounds for dumb, submissive, gullible and beta men, Mtow is needed

[@shownemoto]

Sorry to hear that. But I am happy that you see what you need to see, you are taking a beautiful path!

[@whizkoochristian5580]

​​ @shownemoto Thank you brody, it is beautiful indeed, learning to appreciate new things and live life to the fullest. Keep doing you, I will be here growing alongside you and supporting the channel in everyway I can ;)

[@Queen-hc1zj]

I had a friend in school that would be nice to me one minute and then be bullying me and harassing me the next. She truly ruined my view of people and made me shut myself off to friends for all of high school. I am soon going to university and hoping to make some good friends there. :)

[@S4KuR4Ch4N]

a lot of people around me have a lot of limiting beliefs and it's very hard for me to stay in that environment, I guess I'm scared of being alone too because I've always had a lot of friends but since covid it came down to 1 or 2 persons. I am tired of hearing the same stories, them push their fears onto me, I want to think big and go beyond! I don't want to put them down but each time I try to make them think differently they keep pressing rewind and I feel like I'm swimming against the tides... I'm hoping to meet new people but I don't know how, I'm over 30 yo and most things to socialise is drink and nightclubs which I don't do, tried to look for facebook groups to make friends but I live on an island and couldn't find any... I can feel that I will meet new people but maybe I'm too stressing about it

[@2blackcatz426]

U r blessed living on an island🐦

[@maestrofrags3436]

Dont try facebook groups try out gym or something with a community, if ur uncomfortable to talk to people irl u can start by online communities that share an interest,i can be your friend if you want to talk and relief your stress and worry but getting a friend online just a beginning or adopting a pet its just a step to your evolution or just one friend irl is always one option remember that discomfort is better than comfort Ego is an obstacle getting rejected doesnt define you or what you are...The only thing that can actually define you is your own mind and thoughts that u sit with alone at night...control that,those thoughts and you are invincible.

[@p0tah7]

What island are you living in? I am Curious. I live in australia by the way and I dont even have friends that I am close with. The only people i talk to now are people here on youtube

[@2wickie686]

I just wanna say I love Tsubasa Chronicle so much woishjapgrie

[@Scotchietape19]

I'm so glad someone is talking about friends/friendships. They're just as important and impactful as relationships with family/SO. There are lots of family therapists, individual therapists and couples therapists, so why isnt there one for friendships?

[@myfairytreasures]

Bingo! You are spitting so much truth it’s crazy. When I removed people from my life that don’t aline, everything in my life goes straight up, it’s amazing. And I need to always be conscious of this, so I only keep people in my life that align with me. Love this message and I love your channel. Peace!

[@whosdeea]

"Fear, ego, sabotaging" How does one overcome a situation where these 3 things are a constant barrier in their life?

[@sofiarobles5216]

Confrontation and validation helps to reduce them

[@Aajaaha]

Be brave and trust yourself. That's been the answer for me, and it's not easy, but it's always worth it.

[@goldenhourss]

watching this crying myself to sleep cause my grandma just passed away and my mom has to fly all the way across the globe for her funeral. which means i’ll have to be “the mom” for more than two months while also studying for my uni exams. but i am lucky. i have the best friends ever, even tho i’ll be skipping classes i have someone to back me up, someone to cry to and someone to comfort me. i can proudly say that i’ve eliminated all toxic fake friends from my small circle.

[@dzigerche]

Ihave two best friends they are like my sisters , i would do anything about them. They have been right by my side in the good and most important in the bad, i am growing around them and i dont need to put masks when i am with them. We are not seeing each other so often but when we do the time flies so fast. I hope that every soul here will have what i have. Thank you so much Show for sharing this with all of us🌞🌞🌞

[@EMPANAO321]

Congratulations, u have more brain than those who don't know how to chose friends lol some people can't tell between genuine and fake people

[@esotericeccentricities]

Recently I went through an experience where I had lost a lot of my community while I was going through a difficult time. I'm grateful, though, because it showed me who in my life cared about me and who I should put my time into. Thank you for discussing this. I think a lot of people spend a long time dedicating time and mental energy to a lot of people who have no real loyalty to then.

[@mindverse8972]

Deleting facebook with 400 so called friends made me so much happier. And I'm starting to do the sane with my work colleagues. To treat them like work colleagues only. I've been on a long journey and learnt alot and spending time on my own. Creating a better relationship with myself and wondering at the same time i only want people in my life if they provide value. The 400 people on facebook made me feel so alone and alot were two faced. Negative and provided nothing to anyones life. Nothing is worse being around people who dont care about you. If they did they would make an effort. People's actions determine everything.

[@jackiek4159]

This video came at the perfect time! Having the wrong friendships in life can be detrimental to you levelling up and taking your life to the next level! Having dealt with many crappy experiences in friendship it is important to take the time out to heal and work on attracting better people who are aligned with you! Thank you for the reminder! Sending lot's of love and light! 🙏🏻💞✨

[@keira3959]

I have a tendency to ignore red flags in friends, I tend to just think "oh but they do this just because they want to fit in" because in a one on one conversation they are actually really nice. I am fully aware what I am thinking is true but just because in private they are a nice person doesn't change the fact that they would throw me under the bus at the idea of being accepted or just for a small amount of validation. I usually have the mindset that I should help everyone no matter what so dropping friends is difficult but something I do have to do

[@seasyrenn]

I had a terrible experience that caused my eczema to flare up on my arm overnight due to my friends toxic behaviour,she wanted to come and visit me so badly and then would belittle me in any shape or form even make fun of how my television is " too small " or kitchen is smaller than hers. I always tolerated these things cause she had alot of unfortunate life problems but i had to draw the line cause my health would deteriorate. Your body will warn you..i promise. Negativity to such degree where my stomach hurts and couldn't handle the pain. I recovered cause i decided after that day ill never let someone treat me like im unworthy of being loved due to my financial situation. Be careful of people that leave you entangled and confused so you have to wonder all the time if youre doing something wrong. It has nothing to do with you.

[@Elenasn]

you have no idea what a right moment your video reached me at. Thank you!

[@Mannysantos035]

I love how pure and calm your energy is, even over this screen I can feel the sincerity. So rare! Thank you for spreading positivity and wisdom 🫶

[@shownemoto]

Thank you for you words!

[@glynispalazuelos7216]

I was really stuck and feeling stagnant. I joined a meditation group a few years ago and my whole life changed. I left all my stagnant friends and moved to Mexico. I am so much happier now, making new friends and a new life. If it’s not working, change your environment.

[@bangtanranch1077]

For years I’ve been in a friend group where I have been put down constantly but I put up with it because I thought that’s just what happens in friendships. Unfortunately, since I’ve stayed for a while my mental health isn’t doing too well and it could take a while for it to fully recover, and I’ve also become tuned to believing that it’s better to stay with terrible people than to be by myself, but taking some time by myself now allowed me to come to realize that feeling comfortable with your own company ends up making you feel better, and also finding people that you can be comfortable with and that share similar traits to you will make you feel much better about yourself too. Taking the time to find yourself will allow you to realize how much you are worth, and that although there are some hardships, you will be able to make it through it.

[@seasyrenn]

Right? Just not worth it. I had similar experience. Some hardships are just great lessons..not fun but you learn to love yourself properly.

[@ayallmarew49]

This video really assurred me that I'm on the right path, and the difficult part of my journey was letting of friendships and environments that no longer align with me but it's definitely very rewarding Thank you for this🙏🏽

[@mr.napkin7405]

This is nice, but I find it difficult to attract people who are "ahead of you"

[@markoseries]

I'm going through exactly this in my life. I have friendships that I made from when I was a different person and trying to make them compatible with who I am and who I want to become is proving difficult. Sometimes certain people can be like crabs in a bucket and you just need to either make graceful distance from them in a non-hostile way or cut them off abruptly if they can't behave at all. Honestly, I miss none of the friends that I lost over the years, because there was nothing of value left on those tables. Now, I introduce myself to new people who I look at and respect and probe for a mutual feeling. Surprisingly, most people I've went and talked to are very open and friendly with me, and I wouldn't be upset if they weren't because that would just make my job of finding good people easier. I want to say the quiet part out loud to people and show them that I have good intentions and want to create an environment where both parties can benefit from each others company.

[@Koshi95]

I am lucky that I am sorrounded by very intelligent and good people in my workplace (pharmacists). I am inspired everyday to learn and grow.

[@padmeasmr]

I feel this. I have a friend who I feel is stuck in the same place of like 10 yrs ago. I mean she deep down would like to change and even went to therapy on my suggestion and slightly improved their life, but overall she's stuck while I did a million things and experiences and Ive grown so different. She sometimes says she wants to be like me, fearless (I wish lol) but then she doesn't act. She wants to spend more time with me but I just don't really connect with her anymore. I cannot "cut" her out cause shes family, my brother's wife and at first we were really close, now she's more like a sister. If I told her the truth she'd be devastated, but in the end it's not up to me to change her life. I can only give her an example. But I struggle a lot because of this when we are together, cause I care about her but she also doesn't enrich me in any way, even her voice annoys me lately. I just feel bad that she doesn't have any real good friends, her friends suck tbh and sometimes she realizes it and tries to leave them and rely on some online friend, but I know she's kinda clinging on to me. Uff I'll soon move away again from my family but still...

[@shownemoto]

Everyone has different path so she might be ready or not, you pursuing your path is the best thing you can do! Because you have your own life. But keep your kind heart without sacrificing yourself.

[@anniange]

I had a group of female friends that we were always together in high school, in and out of school. When high school ended, the group disbanded. I know we have adult responsibilities now, but I was hurt when I found out that they still went to each other's houses and never called me. I helped most of them when they needed it, but when I needed at least a conversation, they responded shortly and the only one who talks to me these days only calls me to complain about everything that happens in her life. Lately I've been very focused on my personal development, but I confess that sometimes I miss having a friend to chat with

[@Betterialist]

The more i grow older the more i understand the saying "you are the average of the 5 people you engage the most with"...family or friends

[@dimensionalmagic]

Never had friends, neither in person or virtually, a loner, but being conscious of the fact that I'm stuck in a stage of life with nowhere to go, kind of like a dull person floating through the days with no change or accomplishments in life, along with all these comments, kind of reassures me that keeping everyone at a distance and avoiding interactions is for the best. Friends aren't even necessary because I'm my own worst enemy and I wouldn't want to sink the boat with them. blocking and ghosting someone is not recommended for their own safety. reading about these experiences is sufficient to spark reflections and ideas for self-improvement.

[@eligefashion]

The person I thought was my best friend took my dog and kicked me out last week right when I need him the most... I will never forget this. I will never live this down. I will always regret befriending that person. He destroyed my life while claiming to help me build.

[@jade6957]

I feel the same as the commenters I knew the channel came up for a reason in my life.. our special assigned FBI agent really is watching and listening to all of us but thanks FBI agent they really taken care of me here

[@microzal]

Being alone is better than being with the wrong person. From there we will learn how to prioritize ourself and choose the right person to stay close with. Currently in a progress of exiting being a nice person and this video exactly give me the courage of embracing the fear of discomfort and that guilty feeling of possible dissapointment from others. Thank you!!

[@Pastelghost143]

When I was 12 I just wanted to make as many friends as possible I was thinking that if I had a good chat with you then we are friends now I wasn't even setting boundaries and respecting myself I was their clown and they would bully me and then say we were joking. they were The worst of all, but now I am setting my personal boundaries and I am not very interested in making friends, as I have become interested in developing myself and my personality, thanks for this video💜💜

[@roymillers6730]

Oddly enough I'm considering to cut ties with some loose ends; this has intrigued me I'd prefer to keep correlation, whilst reducing a quantity. "Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." -Oscar Wilde

[@novaknight2256]

@3:20- never abandon a sweet/kind/good charactered person. You don't have to leave them because you can inspire those people to make better changes with you. When they accept, this will build camaradere and love

[@marin9361]

thanks man, i need my 23 years of my life to find this value, to realize all of this. thanks u hit me a lot.

[@ashleycora138]

This is so true. It makes me so sad. I don’t want to let go of this person but I’ve been on a journey & when they are around I fall backward. They’re not bad, there’s just a huge gap in how spiritually far we’ve come. Damn.

[@novaknight2256]

@3:30 - you don’t have to leave them. Inspire them to make better changes with you. If they accept this will build camaraderie and love

[@1OddlyOdd]

It’s been three, long, lonely, depreciating years since I graduated. Officially an “adult”, didn’t mean anything to me. I knew something was wrong but I realized too late I might’ve messed my social life up when I thought i was better off alone. I was at a point where I just didnt know how to socialize anymore. I’m awkward, and extremely monotone, I don’t want to talk to most people I interact with, if I ever do interact with people. Deep down all I’ve ever wanted are people who think like me. I just never knew where they were, or how to find them

[@maynardsasshole3047]

Goods new; they are near but far away still at the same time. To bring you some sort of comfort, I have the same thing going on. I’ve felt so lonely ever since highschool. I try so hard to make friends so to make a change or try to meet new people but they don’t know how to socialize either and when I find someone who does; I can’t hold it properly because I’m unsure of how to talk to them kind of.

[@gabrielaruiz8222]

I’m glad this video came about after I started doing exactly this. As someone who’s always had a deep self hatred I got tired of it and I changed my environment I started doing things about what made me dislike myself and then I started changing my friendships exactly that I would smoke with them and complain about life but never did I do anything. They aren’t bad people I love them even though some hate me for not wanting to continue the friendship I didn’t just leave them it became me wanting better for them and them saying it wasn’t for them so then all I asked was that they respect my changes and that went down hill. I’m doing better now, I’m doing things to change my life for the better, got my closest friend by my side doing the same with me

[@TinnaxB]

You did something for me! Can’t really explain it but you made it all make sense as I was feeling bad and sometimes thinking I am at fault for not accepting these people and for cutting people out of my life. Thank you! You are truly awesome and your energy is amazing! 🤗❤️🙏

[@Bluemoonjellyfishh]

Love this video. I just let go of all my friends as they were treating me very poorly. I sleep better, eat better, have more energy, am doing awesome! Really makes a world of a difference surrounding yourself with good people 😭

[@boriso728]

the moment he speaks i get so insired and lost in my thoughts that i need to scroll back and rewatch minutes 😭

[@evrypixelcounts]

I've been stuck in one place for so long, the rest of the world feels like a mirage. I've become comfortable in my discomfort. Familiarity became a crutch. I need change, or I will become a walking corpse. A few supportive souls could be the very lifeline that keep me from going astray when I explore the unknown, or it could be the final nail in the coffin.

[@Lillymu961]

This has given me something to ponder on, mainly because I have always tried to be an inspirational person to others to the point that, up until recently, I never really thought to look for inspiration in the people that surround me on a day to day basis, at least not in the last few years. I am definitely the lone wolf type when I have to deal with tough things. Surviving through difficult circumstances was always more important in my mind than elevating myself to the next level on my own accord. Life has always forced that out of me, even now, whether I really wanted to or not. The friendships I'm building are helping me, though not all of my circumstances are ideal, which makes determining which friendships truly elevate me difficult. A change in environment may be necessary in my future, and I think the hardships I'm currently dealing with and informative videos like this are assisting me on that road toward my future. At the very least, I feel more at peace within and that's plenty for now. Thank you for your contribution to that peace through this video and others you've made. Best wishes and God bless you. :)

[@shownemoto]

Im happy that I could help you to find more peace within!

[@StripesFxYT]

This is a probem that isnt spoken about alot..when you've spent so much time trying to help people that you don't even realize that you've stopped yourself from attracting people who ACTUALLY inspire you.Ive also learnt that most people are beyond help coz they've married they're comfort and wont let it go even if it means they'll become a better person

[@groovymelancholic07]

This is unrelated but can we talk about how this man is so gorgeous like omg

[@sadderday6]

The family u were born with, doesn't have to be the family u should be with. - short film

[@juliannaj7315]

i had a depression because of " friends" so now I know the importance of being well surrounded

[@klemenkovacic9109]

What i wish the most is just having people around me wanting to make money together, no matter what it takes, but you just cant find such people just anywhere.

[@vivnogueira]

This is a powerful message! I've been stuck in the middle for a few years now, where I see old friends that don't resonate with me anymore (and don't want to explore their potential to reach whatever goal they may have), and the people that share the same values as me and have loads to teach me, but I feel a literal wall (self-built) preventing me from getting truly close to them.

[@Looneko]

I realized that I indeed have some people around me that bring me nothing, and who are they ? People I don't want to talk to. But if someone makes you happy, don't get them out of your life on the basis that they are not above you or bring you anything else Yes, change your life, but don't make yourself sad because you want things to change.

[@salrash1648]

I think it's complicated because I can't just cut out all my friends completely because they are not successful or working on self development because basically we are all humans and full of flaws, If I become a friend of someone who is working on elevating themselves their will be other flaws that I won't tolerate so it's going to be endless loop! I think friendship is deeper than this! Is to understand each other without saying a word, be there for each other in hardship and if they take another path in life it's fine we can create boundaries because all we have is control of ourselves but we can't control others! I think people need to be easy on others and understand them more.

[@salrash1648]

Instead of pointing fingers. I think everyone has good part of her or him and opposite as well its just part of human nature and what's more important than a resume or cv the deep root character

[@salrash1648]

But there are the toxic types which preferably to cut ties with but anyway they don't last long in friendship because they like to be tangled in endless drama.

[@myrtila]

So so true!

[@MinieAnne]

Also not everyone find happiness in the same thing, my idea of happiness may not be the same idea of happiness of my friends what I may find a failure may not be the case for my fiends 🤷‍♀️

[@raresabraleaks8216]

They don’t have to necessarily be self improving, but they can’t be actively self destructing either( I.e. accelerating entropy via poor maintenance of self)

[@jessicab3951]

I really appreciate this video, it’s given me a lot to journal about. My friends are great, and kind- but sometimes I have this feeling I’m not surrounded by the people I need/want. It makes it hard to let them go because it isn’t them truly. I rely heavily on specific social media accounts on KZbin, TikTok and Instagram to keep me motivated and going. Especially since I know how easily distracted I can get, it’s a weakness of mine I’m working on. I listen to videos like yours to keep me motivated, I’ve lived alone since I was 16. And it’s only now that I can feel my c-ptsd not having a strong grasp on my life. I didn’t know what it felt like to live normally till recently, to have consistency in my routine, or learn a new skill without panic attacks. I immediately felt intimidated by this video, I felt scared and frightened about surrounding myself with other people. But I’m going to do it, especially as I pursue a career I’m passionate about, and I’m reinventing myself. Really thinking about the kind of woman and individual I want to be. I’ve noticed I rely heavily on online platforms for support, because even though I appreciate my friends- I feel we aren’t actually coming together to support one another. We’re just meeting up to talk or vent. Then going back to our separate lives, I’ve asked for more but they don’t want that and I’ll respect that boundary. Thank you for this video, I’m going to rewatch it.

[@annfinnerty9800]

Friends are a reflection of ourselves, be cautious and kind

[@itspajara]

Im from a small city in north Spain, and I found breathtaking how there are certain situations that follow the exact same pattern in places so far apart. Great video

[@Bochnik_Loaf]

"You don't want to be a poop"...that hit my soul👌🏽

[@shownemoto]

That's the most soulfull part in this video!

[@christinalwyn]

90% of my time is spent watching KZbin mentors like you. I am so grateful to watch these precious content for free. Thank you

[@kazetarot]

Word! Walking alone is fine until YOU meet new people😊 quality over quantity❤

[@cindynguyen639]

It is so hard because ppl are two face just when u think ur bonding u find out there talking bad bout u jealous envious wishing bad upon u 😢

[@chealipe7445]

I never in counter a friend like that, yeah! they can say like they support you but you can't feel it! like only in words no feelings.

[@draal_d]

Thank you for that video, I'm in time of struggle with myself and exactly feel like stuck in a loop. Start coming out of shadow now so if anybody is in a same place like me I wish you all that willpower to win with your fears! :)

[@PharaoahMonk]

it's amazing how right he is. i'm 38 now but back when i was 20 i made a different choice in life and started a yoga meditation technique that was like a door to the abundance of the universe. i just cut myself out from everything, in a way, from my parents, friends, basketball team and this has brought me so many other opportunities and i traveled so much and ended up meeting soooo many beautiful amazing people around the world from every country that i would have NEVER met otherwise. i reached a point when i felt that i was inspired but also the inspiration and the divine grace was flowing through me. just by shifting mentally and spiritually, had a different core values beliefs and system, my life improved 1 million times. but i had to have courage and also strength to make this shift which is a paradigm shift in attitude. i was always a club partying women chaser kind of guy and just to give an example, 6 months after i started doing meditation, i was in India, meditating around 10000 people same time and meeting my guru, my true master who enlightened me. so i trully encourage you to do what he says, don't waste your time, potential and look at your surroundings. CUT EVERYTHING if it's necessary. don't look back, don't stay stucked, push foward!

[@EVA-ki5vw]

Yoga is demonic. I just couldn't ignore you and left your comment without sharing it Btw you're strong and Loved by Jesus. Peace

[@somi1707]

what i learned here is that i should talk to people who's above even if its just a simple talk instead of like being envious of them i should learn and make them my inspriration, i also learned that advance technology could make us improve and what we consume is what we get

[@marogmartz]

This is incredibly important. Mainly because we usually learn how to make friends by ourselves with nothing but our naive judgement, even adults only talk about relationships when they are romantic but a good ol platonic relationship is rarely something we talk about. We are just expected to know how to make and choose our friends, sure we get warnings on who or what kind of people not to befriend but never get taught. What I've come to realize about me is, though I'm certainly shy and a tad anxious, it worsens depending on the type of people I hang around. Idk how to describe it, some people just suck the energy out of you and not in a fun way but more in a "I won't come out of my house in 4 days until I regain energy".

[@mehakverma7043]

I have never ended a friendship before...they usually cut me out. And then I realize that they didn't actually care about me, and I'm happy they cut me out, because I don't want to be friends with someone who is capable of leaving so easily, its so superficial. But the reason I never break up with someone, is because as long as they stand by me, that is enough for me to hear you out and share a laugh. But its GOOD friends that are scarce, they are the people who you can actually fight and argue with, but you won't worry about losing, because instead of a friend, they are more like your sibling. You'll still stick to eachother at the end of the day, so its okay to speak your mind, be honest and fight with them, because when it matters the most, they will be the ones who will actually love you. I only have 1 good friend right now, and that is enough for me.

[@Neunblau]

Next week Im turning 30 and been most than frustrated or in "crisis" very thoughtful about my circle, about my social, about my solitude and watching this vid, has gave me so much satisfaction, more than answers, because I think this kind of people like Show are guidance, and Im thankful for it, eclipse is coming and this week been feeling that need of saying Bye to my toxic patterns and habits and that includes people that I love so so much, but catch me so bad in their lifes that fade my personality and my dreams away. Very important life lesson.

[@poppyseed5056]

i don’t usually resonate with content like this but this really calmed me i’ve been struggling with making friends and maintaining friendships and this gave me some clarity

[@EuanWhitehead]

I cut friends off and realised that it actually made me really really lonely and out of the loop, luckily I have made a few new friends now and it made me realise I find new people through current ones.

[@middaymoons]

I'm turning 22 today. I don't feel completely stuck, but I'm not moving forward either. The last five years have felt the same; same friends, same town, same studies, same duties. This was really helpful, thank you ~

[@lenajane595]

I can't tell you how much validity this video brought me. I've ended friendships before where I felt mistreated or constantly misunderstood, and whilst I've always been confident in my decision, I've been facing a dilema recently which would change my whole life. I'm studying animation currently (which I love, it makes me smile so much everytime I talk about it) and next year I can apply for uni, and I really want to move to Dublin. It wouldn't be a crazy move as I live in Scotland, but it would mean leaving my life and relationships behind. The friendships I have now are lovely and I would miss them, but I know I'm not going to get anywhere in terms of my career if I stay here. I could move somewhere closer that has BA animation courses, but when I think about what I truly want, it's to live in Dublin. This has turned into a long comment about me rambling about my life lmao but I just wanted to mention it because this video clarified the fact that it's truly myslef that can make or break my future, which is both incredibly scary and liberating, and it feels like a weight lifted off of my shoulders. Thank you

[@dogakeskin5214]

I have a friend who puts herself in a center of everything. By this, I mean if something happens I mean anything it needs to be about her. At first I didn't notice how overwhelming her friendship was. I stayed with her in her hard times. I was the friend who is supportive. Then I noticed she started to put all the burden of her depressive moments onto me. Without saying " she started to say "I feel like crying today". This was when I say what am I doing in this friendship. I felt like an sponge to take all the depressive moments in me. Then I felt alone. Because when it is me who is depressive she wasn't fully there as I did. I decided to put a distance in my friendship with her. Not sure where it will go but I'm hopeful to find time to focus on myself. I also felt to disappointed for a time spent for her. But what can I say I guess I need to open up a space for actual friendships by saying that's enough to others

[@guilhermeestevamzzz]

Sometimes you can easily lose a friend because you envolve and he just stayed the same, it's a shame but it's life.