Sister-In-Law Says I'm Conspiring To RUIN HER WEDDING As I Refused To Sew Her Dress r/Relationships

[@Grace_x68]

Seamstress here. Never ever ever do sewing for free. Quote full for everyone. Family and friends included

[@Park-Kim_VMin]

THIS

[@ophilianecr]

When my mom was alive, she used to make custom wedding dresses and prom dresses. Quoting everyone on time and material/ unless the person purchased the fabric herself. She'd always include a free hair pin/ lapel pin that matched the prom dress. For brides at final payment, she'd always do a discount as a surprise gift to the bride for her big day.☺️ Once, she had a bride who couldn't afford a fancy dress and chose very simple fabric without any embellishments due to price. My mom went out of her way to give her little crystals and beads at the neckline and sprinkled around the dress, for free. She said every bride has to shine the brightest on her wedding day. She made that lady so happy she cried!! 🥰 By doing it like this, every bride felt special getting a discount. Nobody had the entitlement to expect one, as she left it for the day the dress was picked up at final payment.😉🖤

[@truthseeker9249]

Or if god forbid you ever do do something for free because that person just reeeeeally deserves it. DON'T TELL ANYONE YOU DID IT FOR FREE because then everyone will expect it.

[@petitmains]

When people say "I am looking for an outfit for this event and I know you sew" the only way that conversation goes forward is if they immediately follow it with "what's your rate?"

[@Stopthisrightnow560]

Oh, man... If I had a family friend as a seamstress, I would literally pay them a retaining fee so I could have them on call. That's a skill I wish I could have! That's art! And artists deserve to be paid.

[@paden1865able]

I wouldn't approve of my little brother (if I had one) getting married to a spoiled brat. If it's outside of your skill level, you're right to decline making it.

[@immapotato1]

I am pretty sure at the rate he's going dude's gonna end up disowned

[@ynmonroe]

You can't solely blame her if he is siding with her.

[@immapotato1]

@@ynmonroe he isn't. but he isn't "not" siding with her either.

[@OtisFlint]

@@immapotato1 He is. He's still marrying her entitled ass.

[@faeb.9618]

i'd bring a couple of spare materials to sil, a tutorial video and ask her to sew it if it really is just a couple of stitches, see how it turns out if it's so easy

[@NightingaleFilms100]

👏👏👏 to her Dad who didn’t hesitate to jump in to defend his wife.

[@RuminatingRaptor]

And stuck to it.

[@shebakoby]

if SiL had said what I THOUGHT she'd said (like b* or *c or *FU*) I'd have slapped her face off.

[@theseawriter]

Fun fact: In wax seals, yellow represents shame. So, a yellow dress can mean you’re ashamed of your brother/his wife for their actions. (If I remember correctly, that is) Edit: Totally love everyone commenting on what yellow means in different ‘languages’. I only really know what it means in wax seals. If you know more, please tell us! 💛

[@dustyrose192]

it can be different for dresses however

[@danielaprado5895]

Actually there's a Victorian rhyme about the color of your wedding dresses. Dress in BLUE your love Will be true. Dress in yellow you are ashamed of your fellow.

[@medchan5810]

A lot of yellow flowers have double meanings. Yellow roses can mean both friendship but also betrayal. While sunflowers have a very happy and joyful meaning today, they used to mean proud, pompous and delusions of grandeur. Buttercups mean childishness, ingratitude and disloyalty if I remember correctly. And adding in to go with the Spire Dress, orange lilies are gorgeous and mean hatred and disdain. It would be a truly lovely and memorable bouquet to give someone, one full of loathing. 😂🤣

[@impishrebel5969]

Flower language was very popular in victorian era, there's books out of public copyright still out there describing various flowers and colors. Culturally I grew up with yellow being associated with cowardice, like "yellow bellied" meant being of cowardly nature.

[@PaulaSB12]

There is a wedding dress poem and it does say marry in yellow ashamed of your fellow

[@AndyyWithAY]

I try not to engage with foolishness, but I would've had to cuss them both from east to west then north to south too for good measure in story 1. Make the dress or buy the dress. Glad OP called their bluff. I wouldn't go to the wedding either. I don't agree with the sample idea. OP shouldn't have to prove she can't do a more complicated dress that she'll have to pay for materials for. No is a complete sentence

[@BruinPhD2009]

Only east to west? This tomfoolery deserves a good north to south cussing out, too. 😂

[@AndyyWithAY]

@BruinPhD2009 East to West was previously the descriptor for the maximum cussing. But, history has been made today. East to West then North to South for good measure has been added to the lexicon. Thank you. When you see me use it, you'll know you inspired it 😌💁🏾‍♀️

[@thecoolgrandma7208]

🤔 OP should have gotten cheap material, the tulle, stencil designs and spray paint & glitter paint oh and some spray glue, cheap beads. Designed a cheap princess cosplay dress adult version of a child's costume 😉

[@AndyyWithAY]

@@thecoolgrandma7208 username checks out 😊

[@Rose-yt5hi]

@@thecoolgrandma7208OP should have ordered her a dress from Wish. Lmao

[@heatherdickau5335]

Story 1 Ask the bride what color hot glue she wants on her dress. Tell her that is how you attach sequins and lace. The bride is 28, not 18. She has no excuse for throwing temper tantrums.

[@JohnnyDominion]

Even at 17 that still no excuse this is toddler leve tantrums she is displaying.

[@divinebitter1638]

I'd be embarrassed for an 8 year old having this tantrum. 18 months old makes way more sense, plus a kid trying to say the swear word at that age would be funny as hell.

[@shebakoby]

Clusters of Bees throw tantrums at ANY age. Well into their 90s in fact.

[@Michael_Brock]

No the bridezilla is acting like a 8 year old, wait more like a 2 year old toddler.

[@MrsWheezer]

She’s showing exactly how wonderful she’d be in a stressful situation. 😒

[@Hayzelle]

Mark describing the dress in the photo was top tier comedy. 🤣

[@Plaprad]

Better than I could have done. "It's... a dress... I think...maybe..."

[@TheBlondeGeniusGaming]

Also, him calling a very obviously purple/lavender colored dress red made me giggle a bit😂

[@SuperSpecies]

@@TheBlondeGeniusGaming he must be colour blind

[@cynthiaholland13]

​@@TheBlondeGeniusGamingyes it was 🟣

[@shadamyandsonamylover]

@@SuperSpecieshe is actually color blind! So he probably just didn’t know

[@angelicakaufman7183]

I love that second-story and how people always think that they can break your boundaries because you wouldn't dare

[@AndyyWithAY]

Um what is wrong with celibacy? People choose celibacy for various reasons for periods of time or forever. It's a personal choice. Not everyone wants or needs to have sex. I wouldn't go to the wedding. Brother is out of pocket and rude too and his choice of wife is even more disgusting.

[@onepieceisking5493]

I completely agree 💯 and to still marry her after how she's treated his family. He keeps it up and his dad will cut him off and he'll have no family just a horrible bratty entitled wife.

[@autumn557]

Because people assume celibacy = can’t get a date and not a personal choice. So they pick at it but dude, that’s my choice so your not hurting me any.

[@jesterbrown90]

It drove an old roommate of mine nuts that i just didn't want a GF. He knew i had a sizable "research" folder on my pc, and he couldn't understand why i didn't want any of that IRL. The jabs were all in good fun, and i always came out ahead anyway.

[@AndyyWithAY]

@@onepieceisking5493 And he absolutely deserves her. Trash attracting trash.

[@AndyyWithAY]

@@jesterbrown90 I never understand why people get so invested in other people's sex or love life. It's so weird to me.

[@Kelsey1442]

SIL is unreasonable. It’s not anybody’s fault that Covid hit and had to move the date. I would have told her sorry that the fact that people are getting sick and dying is a big inconvenient to you and your wedding

[@harryh4h720]

Except who fucked or whatever animal to contract a brand new disease

[@Rose-yt5hi]

Lies! OP obviously conspired with that lab in Wuhan to leak the virus and ruin this crazy lady’s wedding day! (/s for the oblivious)

[@RuminatingRaptor]

Seriously. What a horrible person! And her enabler isn’t any better.

[@IggyHitokage]

How dare the world not revolve around me! (/s, if that was actually necessary)

[@shebakoby]

that's how you know SiL has *something* wrong with her, like a Cluster of Bees or something.

[@ComaLies225]

I don’t understand people having patience with entitles people like SIL. When she disrespected OPs mom, that would have been it for me

[@onepieceisking5493]

I don't understand it either, after how she treated his sister the line should have been drawn.

[@RuminatingRaptor]

@@onepieceisking5493 Exactly! I’m so tired of horrible people getting away with being horrible.

[@onepieceisking5493]

@@RuminatingRaptor specially ones that are entitled and think they can walk all over others. It's because people enable them that they become like that. Or some rare occasion that their just like that even when the parents tried to teach them otherwise.

[@elalogar7340]

She must be really hot, and OP's brother seems to be only able to think with his lower half.

[@MONKEYDZETS]

Because she has sex with him and that’s more important than respect

[@victoriaherndon6857]

Story 2 OP seems to have not thought about a future with this person? She would end up having meat in her house, meat at her wedding, hes the type who would demand she cook for him and he would eventually make her cook meat or leave him. They are completely incompatable for a life together. Moral vegitarians do not last in relationships with meat eaters.

[@katwiltz1134]

Correction the moral vegetarians end up with friends but not life partners unless cut from the same cloth.

[@LilFeralGangrel]

story 1: that SIL has so many red flags. I would feel bad for OP's brother if it weren't for the fact that he's sprinting towards an awful marriage and he's participating in her nonsense.

[@francinetitherington4060]

OP should have told her brother while she won't make the wedding dress, she would make him a nice shirt to wear to his divorce party celebration.

[@HinataElyonToph]

@@francinetitherington4060 I can just picture how that conversation would go: Bro: “you’re hoping our marriage will fail!?!?” OP: “no, I’m not. I KNOW it will fail, because you are making a HUGE mistake. She will make your life miserable.”

[@heatherdickau5335]

Last story the guy was making a power play and lost. He thought he could bully the op in to paying by saying it is his birthday and then again by leaving. The OP needs to just date guys with her own eating habits.

[@k.e.l.789]

"The OP needs to just date guys within her own mental age group." There, fixed that sentence. I think the lack of respect this man child is showing is a much bigger issue here than his eating meat. XD

[@cynthiaholland13]

​@@k.e.l.789but she also needs to date other vegetarians and reduce chance of misunderstanding

[@jaymevosburgh3660]

SiL claimed Op was "conspiring" to ruin her wedding because she said she couldn't make a complicated wedding dress?! That sentence would have made me nope right out ov that wedding, and if it were my brother that was going to marry this person i would try everything in my power to rescue them from this miserable fate. Entitled people are absolutely disgusting.

[@juliawacker]

Let alone.. How much would it cost to buy a princess dress with a train, beadwork and embroidery? I guess approx. 2500+ dollars. SIL and brother are cheapskates and want OP to pay for the upgrade.

[@MasterBuilderDragon]

Story 2: I’ve heard so many people say they had to “dip into their savings” to buy something. Am I the only one who just keeps every dollar they have in savings so it’s more secure?

[@stuffedninja1337]

Spite is an EXCELLENT motivator. I once wrote a 26-page college term paper out of spite. The page cap was supposed to be 8. (My Japanese Art History teacher tried to boil all anime and manga down to trashy porn. I changed his mind. ^^ )

[@Lp-gn5hx]

That's pretty sad. I only ever watched Pokémon and Hellsing, even i know Anime is more than porn. Good on you

[@ashab6806]

Thats hilarous that a japanese person think that 😭

[@catandrobbyflores]

I am rolling! And he had to read all of it!

[@WyntheRogue]

@@Lp-gn5hx Clearly this teacher before the mind change hasn't seen any Studio Ghibli films, all charming masterpieces in their own right. :3

[@damien678]

A lot of anime has utterly shameless fanservice but I mean...you can't get me to say a bad thing about FMA, or cowboy bebop, for example. Sailor moon will always be precious to me, too.

[@TriXJester]

Story 1: Dont worry OP, I'm sure your skill will improve enough that maybe it would be nice to consider doing for his second wedding, if the first even happens lol

[@wendyhadley2764]

Keeping a promise means commitment on both sides. You promised to make a simple wedding dress, so she needs to be content with her simple dress or find someone else to sew it. You are definitely not breaking any promises. There are very elegant dresses with simple lines, and easy to sew. There's room there for compromise if sister-in-law is willing to give in a bit.

[@sandeesandwich2180]

S1: The first major red flag is when SIL said that since the wedding had to be postponed due to the pandemic, she was "owed" a big fancy shindig. Well, jeez, all of us were laid low by the covid lockdowns -- do we all get some major party with expensive dresses paid for by other people?? I mean, why is SIL more entitled than the millions of other people who have had their lives upended?? Gotta love a post filled with interesting photos, though! OP should wear that Spite Dress every day!

[@Stopthisrightnow560]

I guess that means I'm hitting up OP's SIL for a new dress. 😉

[@catandrobbyflores]

I got married during the height of lockdown, the riots trashing the boutique where my dress was, and still managed to make the small event perfect. She can cry me a river.

[@Tijggie82]

WOW that boyfriend is SUCH a manipulative a-hole. The girl was SO SO CLEAR, but he just had to keep pushing. Disgusting. Glad he got banned from that restaurant. Edit: I don't think it's a weird position even; they have their own very clear boundary, but let others keep their own boundaries. A very fair position I think. Also, eating meat or not eating meat, there IS a difference there in that choice. So comparing those two positions just aren't the same.

[@superzooperhaze6597]

what's weird about the position isn't the position itself, it's the willingness to romantically date someone who will support the thing you so vehemently hate you won't spend a single cent on it. date someone with similar values and this isn't an issue

[@andrewdavis7620]

Absolute clown take 😂

[@Russman67]

Story 2: OP has a rule. She won't pay for meat. For the boyfriend to not just order meat but the largest steak he could find on the menu and expect her to break that rule because it's his birthday is silly. The boyfriend needs to grow up, go back in the restaurant, apologize and pay. Call it a misunderstanding.

[@heathercontois4501]

The counter argument, is they usually split the bill, unless he ordered a vegetarian dish. He obviously enjoys eating meat. She took him out for his birthday, which etiquette wise means he doesn't pay. OP should have been a good girlfriend, payed for the meal and kept he birthday happy. However they are never going to have a respectful relationship with each other, as they have zero respect for each other's dietary choices (regardless of morals) and their personal rules surrounding them, hence she should have broken up with him the next day and should have both moved on. It's called maturity and accepting reality.

[@Russman67]

@@heathercontois4501 They went out for the birthday meal. It didn't say she took him out, he suggested the restaurant. She offered to split the bill. In fact she paid for the wine and his salad. Honestly if someone is taking me out for a meal, I'm not looking at the top end of the menu either. He didn't just go for a steak, he went for the most expensive one. And didn't manage to budget for it if OP said "no" which she did. I do see your point. They very easily could have broken up after this and likely should because this is very fundamental to how a relationship will work going forward. It is hard to expect a lot of maturity from 18 and 20 year olds though.

[@howaboutno.01]

Fuck the counter argument. You should not expect anyone, even a romantic partner, to break a boundary for you just because it's the anniversary of the day you started existing outside your mom. What other morals or personal rules do we want to say someone should break for us because we were born a certain day? "You swore off drinking and I know this but I demand you actually drink alcohol because you agreed when I invited you out for a drink!" "I know you don't want to have kids, but I assumed you'd be okay with unprotected sex just tonight because it's my birthday!" If you KNOW someone has a rule, you don't find a weaselly way to get them to break it. For all she knew, he'd finally accepted and learned to respect her boundary, and just wanted to enjoy a meal with her, yknow, for her company, because he like... loves her, maybe? Not because he wants a free meal of some animal she's going to feel sick about paying for the death of.

[@thecoolgrandma7208]

The BF suggested going out to eat, OP did not invite him out. Also OP is a vegetarian, he knew her rule about not spending money on meat. OP does not push her vegetarian standards onto anyone else, Doesn't impose a rule about not eating meat in front of her, Doesn't make a scene about people eating meat etc.... besides not eating meat herself her only rule is she will not spend her money on meat. This falls in with her standards of not eating meat so will not condone or encourage others to do so by paying for their meat. I see nothing wrong with this. FYI - I eat meat, so don't assume I agree because I must be vegan or vegetarian. I do have a granddaughter who is vegan, who also Doesn't push her eating habits on others or jump up on a soap box to preach to others. It is similar to not offering a recovering alcoholic a beer, or someone on a diet a brownie. All these people have chosen to eliminate something from their diets going forward and people just need to respect their choices, and their choices on how they choose to adhere to them. Edit to add: Unless someone says they will pay for your meal, never just assume they will. Always have the courtesy to choose a meal about the same price range as theirs or less.

[@ALLPANICNODISCO1999]

​@heathercontois4501 etiquette rules are not universal and depend on the socioeconomics and cultures of the people involved. I've paid for my own birthday dinner plenty of times and if someone said they would pay for me I would never get the most expensive thing on the menu and never something I couldn't pay for myself incase a card declines or something. Also HE asked her out to dinner not the other way around so going Dutch was fine. It's one thing to have a miscommunication on who was paying and a whole other thing to pull the asshole move of ditching her with the bill.

[@roowyrm9576]

As someone who sews within my skill range, and who made my daughter's wedding dress. I have every sympathy with OP. SIL and Brother are complete entitled fools.

[@allanmartinez7535]

Great video, there is nothing like a perfect marriage or relationship, I learnt that in everything there is always a solution, 5 years ago I and my wife divorced because we were having some difficulties in our marriage but we are back together, it was a really bad phase but we got through it.

[@wonhur885]

there is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things.

[@allanmartinez7535]

@@wonhur885 its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is SHELLY RENEE WHITE

[@wonhur885]

@@allanmartinez7535 this is helpful, I will look her up. I hope this works for me too, I really miss her.

[@onepieceisking5493]

Story 1, NTA. I understand being upset about having to postpone the wedding because of COVID but FSIL pretty much threw a MASSIVE tantrum and then demanded to have a huge wedding as "compensation" like it's everyone's fault that the wedding was postponed. That's major entitlement right there. Then showed her entitlement again by going off on op for not making her dream dress and accuse op of lying that she's unable to make it. Excuse me? Her brother's solution is that his sister buys his fiance her dream dress or be uninvited to the wedding?!? Hell no, you don't side with an entitled b*tch like that over your sister. Good on op for telling him that then she just won't go to the wedding. Update, happy that the parents are siding with op. Why am I not surprised that FSIL said a very foul word to her FMIL once told that they weren't sure that they could help with the extra costs and probably over siding with op. FSIL is an entitled brat and I bet she's screaming over how she's not getting what she wants, that it's her day, their ruining her day ECT. Op's mom isn't going to get an apology sorry to say because entitled brats like FSIL think their in the right and demand what they want. Op's brother is an idiot to actually still marry that witch after how she's treated his family. I completely support op in wearing the dress she made to the wedding if the brat refuses to apologize to op's parents. Being that's what she called her FMIL just because she wasn't going to get what she wanted, I completely understand why op's dad wants nothing to do with the brat.

[@brokenmask333]

He’ll come brawling once he has to put up with her entitled shit. Then she takes him for everything he’s worth

[@WhitneyDahlin]

​@@brokenmask333I wonder why OP never updated! I really wonder what ended up happening! That was written three years ago!

[@onepieceisking5493]

​@@brokenmask333or he'll be cut off by his family and wonder why he has no one but his bratty wife. Either way it's on him that he chose to stay together with the entitled brat.

[@onepieceisking5493]

​@@WhitneyDahlinI really hope he didn't go through with the wedding and broke up with that entitled brat.

[@RuminatingRaptor]

Well said! I agree with you, completely.

[@DragonTatooToo]

The boyfriend in the second story "didn't budget for this meal" well neither did OP. He suggested the restaurant and he ordered the most expensive thing on the menu. Sounds like most of their dates went like this, he would buy the dinners £50 and she would buy the tickets, more than twice the cost of the dinner. He was using her.

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

Yeah, she's an AH to herself for continuing to put up with bad company. Honestly, being by yourself for a while is better growing experience than having to put up with this tripe.

[@aga3852]

@@user-wr3vt8uq4s I don't like using AH for one self but in a way it is true. She is only harming herself by being with someone so different (and pretty openly manipulative). He, believe me, is NOT worth it. Get yourself someone who respects you at least to the degree they won't manipulate you.

[@BNezzy]

which is a normal thing when you go out for a birthday dinner with your significant other. The fact that OP didn't presume she'd be paying is the oddest thing i heard in the story. The BF's reaction and way he chose to react is what is messed up. Pretending to go to the bathroom while dinning and ditching leaving your gf alone at the restaurant then act like nothing is wrong after is the most f'd up thing in the story lol. If OP's moral compass is that strong with meat, she needs to date only vegetarians. God help the family when they have kids and she forces them to be vegetarians too or catches them eating meat with dad.

[@WhiteWolf-lm7gj]

​@@BNezzy I don't think it's a normal assumption to make when your partner has said flat out that they won't pay for meat, and you're ordering meat.

[@jenniferhanses]

Story 2: NTA. You clarified that you did not invite him to dinner, but that he suggested it. If you had invited him, that would require you to pay for him. But no, you're not required to pay just because he's your boyfriend and it's his birthday. You did not invite him to dinner and you did not offer dinner as a gift. You got him other gifts. You've also been very clear about your rule, which is a reasonable one. You won't stop him eating meat, but you will not subsidize him eating meat either. That seems reasonable and ethical. ETA: Re: It is an expectation that you pay for someone's birthday meal. No, it isn't. It is common for people to invite friends, family, and lovers out for dinner on their birthday. When you issue an invitation, you're the one paying. And many people do this as a part of their gift. But it is a gift they selected, as well as selecting the restaurant that they're willing to pay for. But it is not expected that you pay if your partner says "Hey feel like going out tonight? I want to do something special for my birthday." That's his choice, and whatever normal breakdown of payment for food should be used by the two of you. You don't have an obligation to pay for someone's $75 steak just because it's his birthday and he wanted to go out.

[@RuminatingRaptor]

Exactly! I agree with you.

[@kyleanuar9090]

In my friends circle of eight we pay for birthday dinner ourselves so you budget yourself the dinner for eight and invite them to your selected restaurant.

[@fishbowl5308]

I can't say op isn't an ahole. While yes it wasn't resealable for him to expect her to pay it but just her stance alone makes her an ahole to me. You can't condone the murder of thousands of animals while finding it wrong to eat 1 without being an ahole in my eyes and refusing to pay doesn't change that.

[@Ashbrash1998]

​@fishbowl5308 the animal is already dead, at least if it's being eaten it's not going to waste. If anything OP is being polite in that a rule for herself is just that, a rule for herself

[@MONKEYDZETS]

I disagree you can pay for your boyfriends birthday meal. What is the point of doing something for their birthday? I don’t care if my boyfriend or girlfriend invited me out for their birthday. The nicest thing I can do is pay for them. It’s what you do when you love someone.

[@romonaelrod7870]

The meat story,never make assumptions. If you assume you make an "ASS" out of you and me. I hope that the young lady breaks up with the guy.

[@TheAuthorgal]

The difference between those dresses is probably thousands of dollars.

[@Feynix4]

Oh most definitely. Multiple thousands of dollars.

[@autumn557]

Last one is NTA. She set a boundary. She’s sticking to it. And I know, everyone hates that. It seems like boundaries are just Asshole things to a lot of people but she knows what she stands for. Doesn’t even need to make sense really. It’s HERS. Simple as that and boyfriend knew it. I see that no different than “I will never get married” or “I don’t ever want to wear pink so don’t buy it for me” All perfectly valid because it’s her choice. Also she never once said the dinner was a gift. He’s the one that suggested it, it seams. And I don’t know what she bought him but she made it sound expensive.

[@sagesaria]

Honestly, the only thing that would come even close to me saying ESH is the fact that this problem hadn't been addressed yet, since like some of the comments have said, it's often expected to pay for the birthday person - hell, in my family, my dad avidly refuses to let me pay for dinner on my birthday even if there's a problem with the bill. Communication would have been a massive boon here.

[@DrownedInExile]

He was trying to steamroll her, and now is throwing a bratty tantrum that it didn't work. I hope OP broke up with him so fast, his boxer shorts had to catch the next flight!

[@Ashbrash1998]

​@@sagesariaoften but not this time in my opinion because he invited her

[@jedimasters1462]

I think one thing everyone is skipping over is that isn't wasn't her not willing to pay for his birthday dinner, but that she refused to pay for only the part she didn't like. She would have paid completely for his meal if he had done it completely vegetarian with no meat, which means that it really wasn't about whom suggested it or not. It was more about control, probably for both. Unless she gets a guy whom thinks like her and is vegetarian, she's going to find herself in a lot of conflicts with guys who eat meat. She might even end up back on reddit asking if she's the AH for allowing her vegetarian/vegan (most likely) daughter to throw away the husband's meat and costing him hundreds of dollars. Or she'll be back asking if she's the AH for trying to force her SO into becoming a vegetarian or she won't marry him or something.

[@DarkCrystalSage]

Crochet artist here; NTA, I've had people try worming free things from me even if some of my smaller stuff are around 5 USDs because of the material of the yarn and how long it takes me to make it. This shit happens when people find out you're starting as a baker and they're like "Can you make this thing for us for free" To me that's commissioning me and it's just "My Ingredients and Time aren't cheap, pay up, according to google it's [insert reasonable price]." A former co-worker from my previous job tried the 'I'll pay you with smiles' SMILES DON'T COVER MATERIALS

[@gmun2248]

I design & make jewellery and have made lots of custom pieces for friends' weddings. I am up front with the rough cost of the materials to get an idea of their budget - but then I tell them I won't charge anything for my time, that's my wedding gift to them. It works out for me. I'm not out of pocket for materials; I can't really afford a nice gift (I live with chronic health issues) & this way, I get to give something unique that I know they want. If my health was better, I would like to be able to make the entire thing a gift, but luckily I have decent friends and nobody has made any assumptions I'm making freebies before! (Except my sister... that's an entirely different story.)

[@abelink9229]

Story 2: I wonder if the entire birthday situation was set up precisely to pressure OP into breaking her boundary by paying for meat, and a huge amount at that. OP is NTA.

[@BNezzy]

I am gogin to go out on a limb and say you are insane for jumping to this conclusion lol

[@prtfdc2]

9:23 That dress looks more purple to me

[@GabrielBadwolf]

OP if you ever see this, that yellow spite dress is wonderful. You do undersell your skills. Still don’t blame you for not wanting to do the dress.

[@StephBer1]

"It's just a couple more stitches." That statement proves that the bride knows nothing about sewing. Nothing. And is an ungrateful brat.

[@Kayenne54]

I'd have searched YT for a "how to sew your own princess gown/wedding dress from start to finish" video and forwarded to Her High and Mightiness. With the caption "Just a few stitches; you can do it!!"

[@Miss_Dante]

With the birthday story, he can still fix the fuax pa if he wants to go to his favorite restaurant. Take money and a generous tip ASAP to the restaurant and ask to speak to the management. "Hi, I was here on such and such a date and my girl and I got into a fight that lead me to skipping my bill. I am truly sorry looking back on this and would like to pay and top the waiter a good tip as compensation. I know you'll all be side eyeing me for a while but I promise I usually don't walk out on my bill." However he won't. He wants you to pay and doesn't want to admit he has some fault. Honestly I think everyone sucks in the story as I don't think if you're that opposed to meat that you won't buy meat, you should absolutely not be with someone who eats meat, period. As a commenter said it causes issues for less casual dating and partnership and a blow up was bound to happen. You can certainly be "agree to disagree" with friends. Not partners. He on the other hand is a turd for taking himself out and ordering a large fucking meal and then expecting you to pay for it in general, doubling down and storming out like a piss baby. He is also at fault for the same reason you are! He knows her rule and yet he decides "I am going to stay with this woman and try to rangle her into buying me meat." I don't care how good the d is nothing is worth being with someone who just isn't compatible with you and this right here is exhibit A.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Dresses like what the FSIL want can cost like $5k-10k or more. I've seen similar on Say Yes To The Dress. It's so funny they brought up expectation vs reality because I was thinking about that.

[@catandrobbyflores]

Same! That show is so helpful to figure out expectations vs reality.

[@joshmcatee689]

If she didn't disapprove before, she sure as shootin' does now! The utter audacity.

[@malayshamorgan3918]

Story 1: This marriage ain’t gonna last..

[@VesnaVK]

Vegetarian story: It's incredibly rude to order something that you know your host has an ethical position against, and then insist that they pay for it. OP is not TA. Boyfriend should have been polite enough to order something vegetarian. But he wasn't. He doubled down. Then he tripled down. Then he went even further. That tells me this is about trying to establish coercive control. It's not about vegetarianism.

[@owenfautley]

Op should just date a vegetarian or vegan then because their attitudes to each others dietary preferences will never be accepted by the other.

[@Nathan_Bookwurm]

Those dresses, especially the Elven one, are gorgeous 😍 We all know why SIL wanted it to be gifted for free... 🤑

[@wrenpeach6707]

Mark, you just have such a sweet nature and loveable personality that even just hearing you uncertainly trying to describe the dresses brought a smile to my face. I hope this doesn't sound unhealthily parasocial, but listening to your videos makes me feel like I'm chatting over tea with a friend.

[@joshuapierce3085]

For the dress description of what OP can actually make with her skills, I'd say a "gold hemmed dress of the color and style Megara in Disney's Hercules" would be a good description. As for actual judgement, OP is not the AH and I paused the video to give the dress description before the first update. lol Edit: For the last story, I have a friend who is vegetarian and he has no problem with others eating meat and even cooks it for his husbands at time. The problem with the boyfriend is he seems to be the type that doesn't tolerate differences in lifestyle and will try to force others to compromise their morals and values all so that way he gets more comfort in his own life. OP is not the AH but her boyfriend definitely is.

[@tallyp.7643]

I got the same vibe on the 2nd story. Trying to push boundaries. Good thing OP has a helluva spine, because she's gonna need it to get rid of him and never consider taking him back. He would never stop pushing and accept her boundaries.

[@slytherinlibrarian3501]

Yeah, Mark struggled to describe it and I went, "Just say it looks like a cosplay of Meg from Hercules."

[@tabytha7636]

I think they know how complicated or expensive it is and that is exactly why they are saying If you can't make it then you should buy it for us

[@TheMimiSard]

Story 1 - I sympathise about a sewing project being outside one's skill. If I put my mind to it, I could make elastic waisted trousers or a simple shirt, and I have (way back in 8th grade) made shorts and a hooded sweater, but I would have issues with much more complex, and complicated details like plackets, collars, and cuffs - things I have been taught but the sewing class I learned it in was 26 years ago - I would baulk hard on it.

[@TheMimiSard]

I think the red dress pictured looks some Greco-Roman inspired, and OP probably used the gold ribbon-braid to cover any minor problems. The picture does not do it fully justice, as it's on a hanger, but it probably looks great when worn. ETA: That is a very bright dress, and I did think Belle at first, but "King In Yellow" is a great vengeful inspiration. (If anyone doesn't know, "The King In Yellow" is a story that helped inspire HP Lovecraft.)

[@tallyp.7643]

I considered making my own work clothes for a while, simple skirts for the like when I got into teaching (didn't care for the few floor-length ones I found and others felt far too short to me). But I had to stop because I had the hardest bloody time trying to sew darts. I just couldn't get the hang of what the pattern was telling me to do or even the sewing books I had (this was before everybody who could sew was posting on KZbin really good vids that didn't cover what I needed to see with their hands). Now I don't even have a machine anymore and gave my fabric away to those who could use it. Just didn't get very far at all. think the most complicated thing I ever sewed successfully was an apron with pockets, and that was super basic.

[@leeway3739]

Story 1: I am a professional in the fashion design industry and even *I* wouldn't feel comfortable sewing someone's wedding dress from scratch. It is in my skill level but wedding dresses are particularly complicated and there is a lot of emotional attachment that goes along with it, so even though I made my own wedding dress I would never take on making one for someone else (unless it was something simple like the original wedding dress was supposed to be).

[@tacooflove6175]

🎶 it cost that much 🎶 by whoa dude fits that first story so well about people wanting people’s talent for free.

[@CrimHawkins]

OP is a fan of "The King in Yellow" Hell yes.

[@yaqbulyakkerbat4190]

Brother should have set sail with all those red flags

[@parkerabbott2189]

Morning from Austin, TX Mark! Thanks for the video ❤

[@notconvincedgranny6573]

I stopped making wedding dresses when my last bride lost weight - so I had to take the dress apart and re-embroider/bead the lace (it had already been a six-month project. Then at the last fitting it was obvious she had gained weight. She and her mother thought I'd be able to remove the beading and embroidery, add fabric, add lace, re-embroider/bead WHILE SHE WAITED. Edit: you have one chance in your life to call my mom something other than her name, in. her. house. There will be no wedding and one funeral; bro would be pre-widowed.

[@Silence-1170]

Hi waffles hope you are all doing well today. stay positive and stay safe waffles!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

You too m8🤗🤗💜💜

[@jakemarie828]

I like your dress descriptions. 😊 And yeah the Elven thing might involve metalwork? Certainly Intimidating.

[@Iflie]

How is it an expectation that the birthday boy always gets their meal paid for? I don't think that's even true for the U.S. especially when you may have ordered the wagyu or whatever giant prime aged beef. Even if she wasn't a vegan who never paid for meat that would only be if someone took you out. And he did dine and dash, he could still go back and pay. If he gets banned it's his own fault, she's not his mommy.

[@ynmonroe]

Right? Especially when she isn't the one that suggested going out to dinner. And the fact that he didn't make sure she was paying and what her budget was clearly tells me he is entitled.

[@Iflie]

@@ynmonroe Yeah, she already gave him gifts, spoiled people think they are so special on their birthday, even as adults. Parents who spoil their kids just make them unhappy the rest of their lives instead.

[@kayvon5926]

Because I have friends with money problems I always pay for everybody on my birthday if I want to go to a restaurant. It was a tradition started in college.

[@faeb.9618]

right i heard that esh and i immediately went no it fucking isn't?? you discuss it beforehand no matter who's birthday it is. i've been paying for my own birthday meals and cakes for years because i know that if i don't i can't expect to get a nice meal or what i want to eat

[@Iflie]

@@kayvon5926 I'm dutch and when it's your birthday even as a little kid you are the one bringing snacks for the class and the teachers. At work you bring treats too. If you invite people to a restaurant you pay or discuss what's good for everyone. Or if someone invites you out they will probably say they will pay. Even Sinterklaas gives everyone gifts for his birthday, haha. At the end of a child's party you even give the kids who came a bag of candy to take home. So yeah if you are dutch the only thing you can expect is yours is a gift with your name on it.

[@tracey5324]

I bet you the bride knew the dress was too hard, but she hoped if she browbeat her into agreeing to make it, she could then manipulate her into buying a dress to 'replace the one she promised'.

[@maurer3d]

Story 1: NTA, if your skills are not up to the level needed (or you don't think they are) for what she wants, you had to step away.

[@rowan5335]

I don't think I would have anything to say other than> That's not what we agreed on.

[@lina9535]

Ngl, the "big wedding as compensation" had me in tears from laughing.

[@MorganaCrow]

Story 2: I dont get how everyone thinks OP is an A. She literally has one hard boundary. "I wont spend my money on meat." And for a vegan or vegetarian thats an understandable line to draw. Itd be the same as if trying to get someone who doesnt drink because they dont agree with it to buy their drinks. Its not gonna happen. She had a pretty simple and respectable boundary, and he tried to cross it. NTA

[@robertx8020]

I agree Plus that he ordered the MOST EXPENSIVE meal because he thought "who cares, I don't have to pay" that is an AH move !!! The normal thing to do is to ask "can I order anything I like"? But no ..he knew damn well that she didn't expect to pay so he could guilt trip her

[@PuffyRedCloud]

I was looking for this comment! 100% agree!

[@Kayenne54]

Someone once asked me to knit them something, and I replied "No can do; beyond my skill level" and they looked at me like I was some kind of lazy liar, cheat, scam artist and fraud, or all of the above. It was a weird reaction, in my opinion. Especially if they wanted me to spend hours on it. And apparently provide the fibre and they'd "pay me back later". Just for the fibre. And I'm not a great knitter, very basic. Fair Isle is way beyond my level. Their reaction ensured that I'd nothing for them, ever.

[@areformingamadon]

I watched a video by a cosplayer explaining how expensive custom work is, and why. People have no idea of the work that goes into handcrafting anything. I'm knitting a blanket right now, and while the yarn isn't that expensive, there are a lot of hours required.

[@DerekScottBland]

Story 1- my answer when people tell me "oh, you can just do (this)," is to say "fine, if it's so easy, you do it." They always answer back "but I don't know how to do it!" I say "EXACTLY. You don't know what the fuck you're doing and what is involved with this, so stop trying to tell me how to do it and how easy it is."

[@Cazlouisa123]

Happy Friday mark and everyone! Have an excellent weekend 🎉

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

You too m8💜💜🤗🤗

[@FlamesofJagger]

Have a great weekend 🎉🎉🎉

[@alyzu4755]

FSIL is 28? She's acting like a spoiled child. Stress is one thing, entitlement is very different. And Brother is behaving like a jerk, as well.

[@lorifiedler13]

It's illegal to marry an 8yo.

[@FriedaMMartin]

Good morning from Texas! I made a few dragonfly earrings for fun!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Cool have a good day m8🤗🤗💜💜

[@carolroberts4614]

They sound lovely, I have a necklace with a dragonfly on it!

[@LordBison98]

As someone who is obsessed with King in Yellow I saw the dress and was like "I wonder if it's inspired" and omg YES SLAY.

[@susanbuckler-vardakis9177]

I made my own wedding dress but then I used to teach arts and crafts. It was a simple medieval style dress with beading and braiding sewn onto it.

[@rhylla_864]

Seeing op's red dress pic vs brides wish dress I CACKLED. I dabble with hand sewing and I've had to have similar come to cheezus meetings with people. And that yellow dress is very pretty.

[@cloudsanddoubt]

Love your stories, Mark

[@eddavanleemputten9232]

Wedding dress story: Yay on the Spite dress! I’m a lace knitter and a scrapbooker (mostly frames as gifts for the scrapbooking). I also love to make sugarpaste flowers for cake decorations and have a little airbrush to make them look as realistic as possible. I also make my own mead (honey wine for those who are unfamiliar with mead) and dabble with calligraphy. I do this because my autism causes me to need to ‘dive’ into something at times in order to decompress and avoid a shut-down. Building skill was never my goal, but when you’ve been doing something on a regular basis for over 20-30 years, you get at least average at it if not better. This led people to ask me to make stuff for them and I learned to never, EVER give entitlement even a fraction of an inch. If something is above my skillset, they have to accept that. If something is too expensive, they have to accept that. If they change their minds halfway through a project they have to accept it’s too late for changes. When the agreement is that people pay for the raw materials, the cost get quoted and they have to pay before the project is started. As soon as the raw materials are bought, that deposit is non-refundable. When the project is a gift of my time, skill and the cost of raw materials it means there are no changes involving extra monetary cost and I get to nix the project if it.s above my skill set. If at that point I’ve already bought the raw materials and they decide they want changes above my skill set, I’m not obliged to give another gift (happened twice, I gave a smaller, cheaper present anyway as I could repurpose the raw materials but explained why I could). Making sure all parties are in complete agreement is important because there’ll always be people underestimating your skill, the time it takes to make something, and how much raw materials cost. I might come across as very cold and calculating with all of this but it’s saved me a lot of stress and aggravation over the years. And the many people who’ve either received gifts from me or paid me for my work have always been happy about the end result. There’s been a fair amount of “free exposure”, “but it’s only a little…” (insert yarn, paper & glue, sugar, ink…) and “can’t be that hard” people, but they’re not worth your time or energy. If it’s that cheap they can go buy elsewhere. If it’s that easy they can learn to do it themselves. Vegetarian story: I get where the OP is coming from. She’s been very clear from the beginning. The only thing I’d have done in her place is reming BF that I’m not paying for the meat even if it’s his birthday as he was ordering. To me it feels as if BF was trying to force an opening towards the OP paying for his meat in the future: “But you were okay with paying for it on my birthday!” Nope. And BF is an AH for trying to force her into paying by sneaking out by way of the bathroom. He can always go back, say there was a misunderstanding, lie that he hadn’t spoken with OP for a while and just found out… and pay. He has no reason to be angry at the OP for the fact that HE walked out. He could have immediately reacted when the OP told the restaurant staff to split the bill but he didn’t. As according to the OP she’s often shelling out more money on outings etc whereas he’ll then ‘treat’ with the lesser cost of the meal, BF strikes me as a mooch and a gaslighter. OP’s stance on not having a problem with others eating meat but refusing out of principle to pay for meat seems very similar to friends of mine not having issues with me consuming pork in front of them when they will not touch for it or pay for it. Or people refusing to spend their money on lottery tickets/alcohol/gambling but not having issues with others doing so. A colleague of mine is vegan. She’s very clear on her stance and it’s almost identical to the OP’s. No one at the office has EVER had an issue with it. If one of us wants something containing meat/diary/eggs/honey, she’s fine with it but it comes out of our own pocket. When she’s paying it’s 100% plant-based. BF needs to take responsibility for his actions and the OP needs to seriously consider if she wants an AH and a mooching gaslighter in her life because this won’t be the only time he’ll try this brand of AH-ery. It’s only going to escalate from here on out. And it’s NOT a norm to pay when it’s someone.s birthday. In certain circles/cultures it’s the birthday boy/girl who is expected to pay.

[@justaperson4656]

"that of course I'm paying in materials for." And time, and skill, and labour, and an entire embroidery machine if you don't have one

[@wildblue0]

Story 1: That would be the end of me sewing anything for bro's family. Niece wants to be a princess? Party store is that way👉. Story 2: I don't understand people calling her TA. She's held the same stance throughout the relationship. Even if he could assume she'd pay, he KNEW she wouldn't pay for the meat. His immediate reaction to not having enough money was to ditch her. I'd dump him just for that.

[@naturalPaths]

OP has the best dad ever! Love the ‘you go wild girl dress!!!’

[@Lady_Blade_WarAngel]

Oh sweet baby Tree Jesus, that first story. Like seriously, my grandmother was a seamstress. She did EVERYTHING but never once did she do anyone’s wedding dress. Why? It’s beyond complex. She taught me to embroider, and it takes LITERALLY HOURS of time and concentration, beading takes even more. Just to do flowers on a handkerchief can take days. Let alone a dress bodice, sleeves, beading and such. Also that French phrase, I believe, is “Wishing on a shooting star” the moon is la luna

[@xellosmakuzo2586]

Awww yeah! King in Yellow!! What a great source of inspiration!

[@CarinaCoffee]

Story 2 comments: a lot of people keep separate finances after marriage, sheesh!

[@TheVeggiekat]

I’m in my 50’s and never had someone treat me to dinner for my birthday. Well, maybe when I was a child and too young to cook but my birthday has always involved me cooking and even making my own cake. Where is it a thing that you automatically get treated for your birthday?

[@n0ham]

As a follow french, I can attest that the explanation -and vulgarisation- that was made for our slurs was perfect.

[@Nerdbookworm]

I love to crochet when I listen to you or workout. Your positive vibes always rub off on me

[@tammypearce7491]

Story 2, everyone one sucks - OP, especially.

[@LoveableNiki]

Story 1: NTA. Bridezilla and her enabling Fiancé can get F__KED!!!!! Glad OP didn't hesitate to agree to not attend the wedding.

[@faeangel7649]

I adore the queen in yellow spite dress, absolutely perfect

[@amethystanne4586]

I looked up McCall’s pattern # 2041. The OP must be a wizard at dress design.

[@magiv4205]

I'm a relative beginner sewist though I've made several really nice things for myself, but embroidery is a whole different kind of beast. It is not only exact work, but INCREDIBLY time consuming, even if you're really good at it. There's good reason real hand embroidery is so expensive and was historically a status symbol.

[@lorrainemontagnon1537]

Just waiting for my son and family...going blueberry picking. We Stat off having breakfast, a huge blueberry waffle with whip cream...yummy!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Ooooo yum

[@carolroberts4614]

Sounds nice! We have a p.y.o. fruit farm near us, and you've inspired me to go there this weekend. Strawberries, raspberries and freshly dug new potatoes. And they have a cafe!

[@lorrainemontagnon1537]

@@carolroberts4614 try boiling up those new small potatoes with fresh green beans and peas, drain then add milk and a bit of flour to thicken, salt and pepper. They are super delicious!

[@Tijggie82]

That's red with gold bands? Why did it look purple with silver bands to me? Also HOLY FLIP that train in the first picture! A-mazing 😍

[@TheRisky9]

1st Story: OP took the only reasonable option she was given. People really underestimate what it takes to make something by hand. And it doesn't help that those pintrest type planning websites constantly make stupid suggestions that you "find a friend who can do it" or "see if they're looking for exposure" as viable advise. Shame on them to even suggest creatives would work for free for exposure. Sorry! I'm a little salty because I'm a professional calligrapher and I've had friends wanting me to handwrite their invitations for free. 200 names and addresses at $2 a piece? Girl, that's a lot of "free." Go talk to your high school girlfriend who just bought a pen last week and is "pretty good". I've been doing this for decades.

[@novabrilliant4510]

Listening while I enjoy an adult beverage. Just got back from the beach. Swam for thirty minutes. Perfect evening. Hope everyone is having a peaceful day.

[@paperkay]

Sounds like the princess bride goes ballistic every time anyone says no to her. Best of luck to her husband.

[@rangerdrakeson]

Story 1: 'The King in Yellow'? Hastor! Hastor! Hastor! Long live the Queen!

[@naturalPaths]

The dress pictured is far better than I could ever do; I’ve trouble sewing on a button. It’s a kind of ‘Grecian goddess’ theme, I think. That’s being observed, with a SIL like that? …she’d’ve been lucky to get a Roman toga style wrapped sheet. Seriously, I got an A on it in 9th grad Latin. 😂

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

Story 2: OP is NTA as she has had this rule from the beginning and her hopefully STBX was taking the piss. He KNEW she was against buying any meat related item and he ordered the most expensive steak on the menu without even asking. He ASSUMED she'd pay for him because he's been using her for money for AGES. I mean, she pays 150 for concert tickets while he pitches in 50 for the meal. This is just him been a spiteful and ungrateful asshole. OP is good for standing up to his trifling nature and she needs to reconsider their relationship. Even though I personally don't see her "moral" side to not buying meat, I would respect her boundaries simply because those are her boundaries. The STBX obviously has no respect for her and is just using her as an ATM.

[@jedimasters1462]

That depends on how often they go to dinner compared to the concerts. If they go to a concert once a month while going to dinner once a week, that would possibly be his $200 to her $150 a month. One big cost doesn't always mean that it will cost more than a bunch of little costs during the same time frame. Saying that he's using her for an ATM is only seeing her once-in-a- while purchases as more than his more often little purchases where he could be spending far more on her than she on him.

[@cuzican1902]

Just because it's my birthday, I don't expect anyone to pay for me unless they told me they are taking me out to dinner for my birthday. My bestfriend and I treat each other on our birthdays instead of buying gifts but that is only something I do for her and one other friend. If I am being treated, I am not going to be a pos and order expensive food. I will be reasonable because I am aware that I am not spending my money. If my bestfriend was against buying meat, then I would respect that wish and not order it. Or, if I really wanted meat I would either decline the invite or buy it myself like a grown a$$ adult.

[@ekjamesable]

If any of my children or their significant others called me a connasse, she would never be welcome in our home again, that’s a fighting word. The OP was actually downplaying the insult. It's more along the lines of, a female dog in heat so dumb that she will let everything lay on her without question.

[@Kayenne54]

Wow. SIL is lucky OP's father didn't do anything worse. What a nasty person SIL is. Brother is trapped, may even be abused (stuck during pandemic lockdown status). Men can suffer abuse too, but are even less likely to admit to it, I'd suspect.

[@AryonaSamoto]

Story 1: Future sis is just showing her true colours and OP's Bro should take notice or he will have real trouble in the future. I really hope OP and her family keep their distance and the OP's brother sees how toxic and manipulative his fiancee is. Story 2: He's a major AH for his action and attitude. It also feels like he is trying to change OP to suite him. Major red flag. OP really needs to find someone who has the same morals because her unusual moral boundary would be an unreasonable position to put on a husband in the future. This relationship is over.

[@kaitlynhall2112]

That cape dress looked like something Padme Amidala would wear

[@shells500tutubo]

Opin story 1 needs to learn that if you are sewing something for someone that what you do for free is the LABOR, not the materials.

[@ToeBeanCozy]

That yellow princess dress, do iiittttt. It's gorgeous and do it 😂😂

[@drea4195]

Bravo to OP for her spite dress! I love that.

[@terramarini6880]

I have been sewing for decades, I own 3 sewing machines, and those dresses were beyond my ken. I bought the fabric, notions and 3 different patterns to design (Frankenstein) my wedding dress together but a professional seamstress did the real work. What in the world are these people thinking? Ah! they thought Wish/Aliexpress was the go to reference, explains a lot. Should have watched say yes to the dress, would have been more accurate, price wise at least.