Smack Talk: The Last Jedi Review

Star Wars The Last Jedi is the latest Star Wars film to thoroughly annoy Professor Tosspot. Enjoy the review folks!
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[@jazeroth322]

I feel sorry for mark. He’s the only one that gets Star Wars and yet he wasn’t listened to at all

[@Ruldolphmaker]

Mark hamil being a raging feminist may be one thing, but you know what? he's still provided a lot with his talents, and this film was a serious redpill to him. Heres hoping he can become James Woods

[@markhenryabello2193]

I agree. I felt his talents were wasted. What if the Joker walked in on the set of Star Wars?

[@HamannGeorg]

Before TLJ he seemed to genuinely care about Star Wars. Sadly he seemd to be the only one und wasn't listend to. He could have made the movie great.

[@80sMoviesRule1]

@Ruldolphmaker no his caracter was flipped to ridiculous extreme but the real mark Hamil would never turn into a forever trumper. God James woods is stupid.

[@I_Cunt_Spell]

@@80sMoviesRule1 James Woods is stupid? Umm, his IQ is 180, you inbred leftard.

[@ToxicDonut]

"Having mistaken the planet's salt for cocaine." Aaaaaaaaaaaand subscribed.

[@carloslugo9062]

hahahahahaha, that got me as well! hahahahahaha

[@danielanderson3286]

Gravemind IV 🤣🤣🤣

[@Shady-Shane]

Aaaand that's a rocket ship....?

[@Davidofthelost]

BLAIR M Schirmer That’s just Daisy’s true acting behind the bland mouth breathing mask.

[@mikesinyaboot5992]

"Is he a hero yet? Nope....gets beaten up my muslims...actually..what? Oh, sorry...sandpeople. What's the difference?" This is just bloody brilliant.

[@jasonfields7058]

I just heard the line and shit had me rolling, LOL. Mad random and out nowhere.

[@red_crayon9771]

Space Muslims

[@mikesinyaboot5992]

@@jasonfields7058..."Carrie Fisher is on the rebel base, having mistaken the planets salt for cocaine.....so now the stakes are high." His quips and one-liners are absolutely amazing.

[@royfernandez3945]

10.48

[@flyingfish5054]

Tusken Raiders are just afghan tribesmen, change my mind

[@Nixonitus]

"Space Columbine" is how I am going to refer to Kylo Ren from now on.

[@fireinourbones6600]

DoktorKebab Kylo-Columbine with ticket sales down 42% and about that many who did see it didn't like it. That is a pretty low approval rating.

[@spiderjeranimo4992]

I like 'Darth Vaper' myself.

[@ignemuton5500]

Kylo's got a quick hand, he'll look around the temple, wont tell you his plan he's got darth vader's mask, place it on the table he's a edgy kid he's got a tri-saber sword...

[@bjorn301]

Emo Ren.

[@nunyabizness9045]

Emo Vader

[@MandaloreGaming]

"melting sugar daddy Snoke" Bless your writing.

[@VoxisProductions]

Thanks buddeh.

[@khamulthewack4732]

MandaloreGaming Bless you for introducing me to this gem of a channel.

[@TheOrangex88]

Mandalore! I didn’t know you were subbed to this channel

[@hammer326]

Fancy seeing you here; longtime and HUGE fan of your stuff. Loved your Planetside 2 and BF2142 reviews.

[@emhu2594]

MandaloreGaming Isn’t it great that they got Hugh Hefner to play Snoke?

[@BaconBotVbeta]

“The Star Wars equivalent of Columbine” is the best thing i’ve heard all week.

[@inverted_real_it_y]

As in a scripted event 😘

[@atomicsquid9836]

"raped in a ditch by Ryan Johnson" The most succinct and accurate summation of this dumpster fire as I have seen.

[@Raximus3000]

Let's hack every stream version of TLJ and give the roundhead all the credit he deserves.

[@porkflaps4717]

The only thing to add to it would be 'a salt ditch'

[@Lappelduvideify]

Rian. It's even spelled out for you.

[@BrettonFerguson]

I would call it Fan Fiction, but I doubt Rian Johnson is a Star Wars fan.

[@mikem4432]

Jar Jar Abrams was the first to rape this franchise with his complete moronic remake of A New Hope, only much much worse.. a complete lack of any fresh idea's, story, character development or just a basic story.. it was Lost in Star Wars, many pointless plot points like a shit thrown into a fan..splat..

[@indoctrinationtheory1468]

Star Wars: The Last Jedi. Not so much a "passing of a torch" as it was the "raping of a corpse"

[@Treyworld]

I applaud you.

[@dryridley208]

Indoctrination Theory kek

[@ravenwhiteduck2982]

Lol

[@Smoking_Tiger]

The other director was "let go" or "replaced" for "creative differences" TRANSLATION: The other director was fired because Kathleen Kennedy wasn't getting her way.

[@762rk95tp]

I'm almost certain Colin Trevorrow left by his own initiative after he realized how badly Rian had ruined the lore and any sort of semi coherent plans they had for the new trilogy. Kathleen just said that let go for creative differences part to appear to be in control of things.

[@Ciborium]

Lord and Miller were fired because they folded their socks incorrectly, according to Darth Kennedy.

[@KM-dk5gn]

Pretty much every single director who has worked on Disney Star Wars under Kathleen Kennedy has been fired or quit due to artistic differences. So obviously KK is the real problem, not everyone else since she's the only constant in the equation.

[@philingrouille7198]

And at the end of the day, Kennedy's way was to completely shit on the fans and legacy of the franchise, and leave their 4 billion investment in the shitter. Seriously why hasn't she been fired yet?

[@Xehanort10]

Kennedy: What? You want to make an actual Star Wars film and not space Twilight where I- I mean Rey gets turned on by seeing Kylo shirtless? How dare you. Fired.

[@dove2156]

The quality of your content is way beyond your subscriber count.

[@YasharelYahawadah]

Smh, i'd go to the movies to see his content, instead of that crud the last jedi

[@GamingPenis]

this

[@williamw2529]

The quality of the review is way beyond what this train wreck of a film deserves.

[@juanesmit8417]

Indeed, I just subbed at the end of the video, great and objective work.

[@PlayStation360Gamer]

So it's over 9000

[@2LucasKane3]

I hereby declare Disney's Star Wars non canon.

[@Brakiri]

Lucas Kane: Agreed!

[@ravenwhiteduck3158]

Here here

[@yl1974]

Seconded!

[@sicko115]

Aye!

[@ericward8459]

Star Wars EU Forever!!!

[@son_of_caesar8908]

"Nope, gets beaten up by muslims." LMFAO! Damn dude you got some great lines!

[@John-X]

"Carrie Fisher is on the planet, having mistaken the salt for cocaine" omg this guy is a genius XD

[@nickmitsialis]

Since they 'indigenous' wouldn't it be more proper to say he was beaten up by 'Injuns'?

[@916hayabusa]

Best line 😂😂😂

[@mushitori123123]

I'm middle eastern, ex-muslim, and even I and my friends found this line funny, especially when he says its the same thing as sand people LMAO, its not insulting if its actually funny

[@serengede]

A decade later, people won't care about these new movies. The originals are still loved, and even the prequels are still popular.

[@tommy1138]

A training montage with Luke and Rey would have really helped The Last Jedi. Luke didn't train Rey at all, because she was born perfect. Rey was a full fledged Jedi when she came out of the womb, because..... GIRL POWER!!!!!

[@74kross]

Yeah sjw BS. She even got the better of Luke in that little tussle. Im surprised they didn't have her training Luke

[@bahamutkod]

Ken R - they more or less did. Had her beat him up and tell him off... then he decides to project himself and die because of her inspirational words

[@softwhiteund3rarm0r]

Why have Luke die when Rey lifted the rocks anyways? One dies, one does NOT. So idiotic story wise. Awful use of Luke. Who cares what Rey does when the real skywalker dies. (Not a palpatine by blood either so SIT DOWN MA-REY SUE)

[@natecw4164]

In anything if you want to go From just a beginner to a pro You need a montage (montage) Even Rocky had a montage (montage)

[@morbidone88]

Mary sue for all its worth

[@naveedclifton]

"And already, Disney have planned the next trilogy, because cocaine isn't cheap. Isn't that right, Daisy?"

[@TheChugg11]

"Disney are already planning another trilogy because cocaine isn't cheap"- actually made me lol

[@muznick]

Isn't that right, Daisy?

[@TheNefastor]

LOL I'd say they are just throwing good money after bad, but that works too 😁

[@aygwm]

This movie is a sign of the times.

[@Wayoutthere]

Transformers is dead, Star Trek is dead, Star Wars is dead, Aliens is dead, Ghostbusters is dead... What the fuck did I miss?

[@copyorange]

@Wouter Terminator.

[@SuperLloyd84]

@ Wouter d.B. Doctor Who.

[@MKUltra3]

Justice League.

[@SuperLloyd84]

Dale ANC Puppet for PM. The movement starts here.

[@LukeLovesRose]

Poor Mark Hamill. You can actually see his soul getting sucked out of his eyeballs

[@meggrotte4760]

I think that's because he and Carrie Fisher were the only ones who really cared about Star wars. Freaking Harrison Ford wanted his character to die in the second movie douchebag. Star wars basically what made his damn career.

[@frauleinhohenzollern]

@@meggrotte4760 I met Harrison once. He struck me as a total loser. He comes off like a fucking airhead, he just kinda grunts and struggles to string together a sentence like Joe Biden. He also looked homeless like he didn't give a shit about his personal appearance. Granted, I met him one time for 15 minutes so perhaps he isn't always like that. But from what I've seen in interviews and whatnot he's not a very cool guy.

[@meggrotte4760]

@@frauleinhohenzollern well it certainly wouldn't surprise me Hollywood is pretty screwed up. He doesn't really seem to enjoy or respect his fans. Keanu Reeves does he's quite kind of people.

[@CollyDoo]

Yeah man I felt bad for him having to be involved in this steamy pile of crap trilogy.

[@insensitive919]

George screwed him. He could have warned him before selling out to Disney.

[@Mindcrime80]

"having mistaken the planet'salt for cocaine" ...ahahaha

[@NextGen_Pants]

Mindcrime80 my sides passed on from this world into the next

[@VK-by1vz]

that was brutal...naturally I laughed

[@evanbelisle8464]

She would’ve laughed at that line.

[@starsiegeplayer]

​@@evanbelisle8464she absolutely would have 😁

[@samuelbekele3601]

Did Kathleen Kennedy just assume the gender if the Force?!

[@Seadog7981]

samuel bekele the force is an attack helicopter.

[@Jericko427]

Kathy is a control freak, and a fucking moron. Fitting that Lucas would put her in charge.

[@meggrotte4760]

Yes

[@aarons1811]

Could you imagine if George Lucas wore a T-Shirt saying 'The force is male'? Hypocrisy at it's most small mindedness. I can't help but think that in ten years, people will look back on this whole SJW episode and cringe...

[@Hirnlego999]

@@aarons1811 But, it's not about SJW, it's because they want women to watch SW too. It's just marketing. Quite amazing that this goes over so many heads.

[@marcallard5100]

feel kind of sad for Mark Hamill the way he look at the end :(

[@carlosdelfino3589]

it is the inteview after the premiere.. Mark didnt know, that the roundheaded StarWars-Saboteur that sits at his side, vanished him into nothingness in the editing room... Roundhead thougtht that would be a good idea.

[@KneelB4Bacon]

@@carlosdelfino3589 Yeah, that clip is from just after the premiere of "The Last Jedi." Actors know a lot about the individual scenes they were in, but they have no idea what the overall movie will look like until they see it at the premiere. In post-production, scenes can be added or dropped, lengthened or shortened or re-edited in ways that can completely change the way the actor thinks the movie will go. Poor Mark looks shell-shocked, there.

[@Maverick-7508]

He honestly looked like he wanted to strangle the little round headed hack next to him.

[@ScreamerProductionss]

"Gets beaten up by Muslims" I spit out my drink and almost pissed myself at that line.

[@bogusmogus9551]

I thought he was talking about Tommy Robinson

[@Justdisco2]

Maple_Hobbit I nearly chocked on my pie, when I heard it, I’m with you brother, absolutely hilarious

[@rali1638]

Wasn't funny

[@ciaranbyrne5729]

Yeah me too =]

[@philingrouille7198]

@@rali1638 Good for you

[@DeathBringer769]

I think it's hilarious that Daisy Ridley has resorted to saying it's sexist to call Rey a "Mary Sue"... lmao. When all other bullshit defenses have failed you, resort to the victim card, of course... Even if her character was a boy it'd still be the same criticism, the same problems, regardless of whatever the male term for it would be, "Gary Sue" or whatever you prefer.

[@JeithKarrett]

What pisses me off is that The Last Jedi proved that Rey was a Mary Sue.

[@ashadowskull]

It was already proven in Force Awakens. Last Jedi had the opportunity to fix that by giving Rey but actual training. But they decided not to.

[@JeithKarrett]

Oh yeah, she's still a Mary Sue in TFA. It's just that they reinforced that in TLJ.

[@TitanFind]

Gary Stu.

[@angrypandable]

Swixen i think why people were hesitant to call her a Mary Sue in TFA is because we didn’t know her backstory and she could have had Jedi training and then had her memory wiped or something. But now in TLJ they basically say she is no one with shitty parents which proves how much of a Mary Sue she is in TLJ and compounds her Mary Sue-ness in TFA

[@ninetalesxyo8842]

Disney botched Star Wars - They literally places a 4 billion dollar check in the toilet and violently shat all over it - then flushed it away

[@mrjones29]

Thing is they can afford it. Their feminist message is more important and will last longer than inflation of $4B dollars over the next 15 years.

[@pikachuneoncat6480]

Ugh, yeah. The Force Awakens was okay, but then all that okayness died when they fucked over Luke's character, made Rey Palpatine's granddaughter (which doesn't even make fucking sense), made Reylo an actual thing (because showing toxic relationships love was something we always did to audiences of impressionable girls), and worst of all, _Rey Skywalker?!_ That doesn't even make sense in the fucked up and convoluted narrative they made about Rey! She's a fucking Palpatine!

[@harvestcanada]

Star Wars has always bern about money, Hollywood is the mo ey maker. Everyone knows this. What irritates is everyone thinks their an art critique, try watching Repo man. No?!!!!, flakes. The puppet is pissing the industry for taking cherished story that had a cult following and then coke sniffing execs stu k a price tag on it undermining the artform of film making.. Iam frustrated with good stories being sabotaged by bruski boys and execs with no artistic sense or directors passed their sell by date. I either watch cult classics or simply watch independent movies from around the world

[@alt-centristintellectualfe3621]

*"PROPERTY OF HARVEY WEINSTEIN. DO NOT REPLICATE"* 10/10 Couldn't have asked for more.

[@bonzodog67lizardking15]

Does that mean Daisy pleasured him??

[@tyty8484]

@@bonzodog67lizardking15 Diddling a Dollup of Daisy

[@metalmugen]

That footage is fucking hot tbh

[@stevevanderslice2244]

@@bonzodog67lizardking15 That would explain all the crying.

[@implicaverse]

Mary Sue is a projection of a heroism that could only come from lazy cowards. The hero's journey is not some artifice of writing, it's the way anything is done in life. You find a problem, you try to solve it, and you keep on failing and getting back up until you get good enough to solve it. That's how everything in life works, whether it's a career or parenting or trying to figure out why your computer is acting weird. And it's especially how things work when you're in a life or death situation with high stakes. Disney's Star Wars executives and Kennedy have no conception of what real courage or what even real struggle is. That's why a hero's journey doesn't even occur to them.

[@TheNefastor]

So many good comments on this video, but yours is among the very best. Mary Sues can only appeal to the "participation trophy" crowd.

[@DomR1997]

That's why the first born is the damaged one usually, ya make your mistakes with the first batch and hope to get the recipe down for the second one.

[@TheNefastor]

@@DomR1997 yeah except all of Disney's Star Wars movies are horrific abortions.

[@DomR1997]

@@TheNefastor That's a fetish online. A triplet abortion would fetch a hefty price...

[@TheNefastor]

@K Ren wow, you're a moron ! Also, I'm French, I hate both Bush and trump, and I also think Disney Star Wars is total garbage. So does my girlfriend. So does her woke-ass brother. How do you explain _that_ ? Stop acting as if this character went through an arc : it went through an incoherent trilogy that even retcons itself. There was no plan for any of the characters throughout those 3 movies and you know it.

[@Xehanort10]

The worst thing about the Kylo and Snoke bits is that Kylo went from respecting Snoke and calling him wise in The Force Awakens to killing him in Last Jedi just because Snoke made fun of his mask.

[@VoxisProductions]

Hey everyone! Thanks for the likes and comments. If you didn't like this review but still watched it, thanks anyway! This took me ages to make and I've had horrendous health problems, but I figured you guys could do with some content for Christmas. As you know I don't monetise these videos or do patreon or any of that stuff. I just hope you are entertained and if you feel it's worth sharing then please do. MERRY CHRISTMAS! UPDATE: I spent my Christmas back in hospital ;_; but your kind comments kept my spirits up. Thanks you lovely lot =)

[@Slurms19]

Thanks Prof. Tosspot!

[@c.a.t4607]

Voxis Productions thank you.. This was a perfect review of a really bad star wars movie... May the force be with you... And if that doesn't work there's always the Schwartz too... Lol.. Great vid!!!

[@Sannidor]

Entertainment for some, for me it's a catharsis. Thank you.

[@breckharrison]

pretty sure showing all this content is illegal... I dont give af, you rock!

[@Morosythblxxd]

Voxis Productions buetiful video I will share this good sir

[@rodster6campingprepper]

I agree about Rey. Such a boring character due to there being no development with her, no where for her to go as she's already perfect. As for Finn, even the writers don't seem to know what to do with him. Yet they then add yet another pointless character in Rose. The utter idiot who crashes her ship into Finn, potentially killing him in an attempt to stop him killing himself. I guess if she saw a guy about to jump off a bridge she'd shoot him to stop him killing himself.

[@stryyker9]

I thought there was a chance if they had the balls to have her actually go dark especially since she has chemistry with Kylo, but NOPE - Mary Sue all the way.

[@intoxovision3121]

www.nytimes.com/2017/12/22/movies/star-wars-last-jedi-women-run-universe.html

[@mikespearwood3914]

Intoxovision exactly what is wrong with StarWars now: too busy pushing anti white male cutural marxism instead of concentrating on making good movies!!!

[@esteevius]

Finn should've been put in a coma again. At least the story would be consistent that he's prone to comas. Instead, we get someone else in a coma. The next movie Rose will tell Finn that they have at least one thing in common, they've both been in comas.

[@die1mayer]

Finn flying into the siege cannon and sacrificing himself to save the day would have been a beautiful ending to his character, giving him an actual purpose instead of being comic relief. But NO, we can't have that, the asian chick has to save him, so MaRey Sue can appear just in time and recue the Resistance effortlessly. Can't dilute the feminist narrative..

[@erikduchamp512]

"Property of Harvey Weinstein." Hahahaahahahaha !!!

[@Sweetness71775]

Getting ready for the painal about to come her way.

[@BryonLape]

The toys are not selling and TLJ toys were on clearance before the movie hit. The empire is crumbing.

[@pollywaffle79]

I'm buying them all because they will be worth a fortune in 20 years because the film is so infamously shit

[@AvengerII]

@@pollywaffle79 That is such fucking INSANE thinking. People's opinions will NOT change on these films 20 years from because they're shit. You STILL wasted your money because nobody will want to buy those toys from you! They're badly designed on top of being reminders of films people DIDN'T want to be reminded of. That's why they didn't sell in the first place!

[@BrettonFerguson]

The Rose Toys were on sale for $5. I bet they dropped the price to $1 by now. Just checked, you can get them for $3, some places charge $4.50. I wonder how many years it will take to sell them all.

[@ryanbarker5217]

as a collector, part of the problem is fucktards in charge of distribution. you can't buy what's not on the shelf, and not everyone is too hep shopping online.

[@FoxUnitNell]

Since the force is now female, they should have known to release Last Jedi toys which vibrate.

[@taker610]

Kathleen Kennedy seems like a real egomaniac, every time you see her it's just like she wants to use Star Wars for own self-aggrandizement.

[@TheChugg11]

taker610 Similar sitch to the CEO currently killing KZbin (can't remember her first name and can't spell the last!)

[@Muck006]

You misunderstand the problem: feminism is a RELIGION and Kennedy is just one of the zealous extremists who spread it in society.

[@davidguymon1673]

This is what happens when you give children trophies for being failures.

[@TheNefastor]

My sentiment exactly. Kids need to taste failure, it's the only way we progress. Like Musk said : fail early, fail often. That got him Tesla, SpaceX, etc... only morons fear failure because they don't know it's a learning opportunity.

[@vaevictus4637]

That definitely started long after Rian Johnson's childhood. Talk about an idiotic comment.

[@khamulthewack4732]

... What? What does that even mean? Are you blaming the failures of this movie on Rian Johnson's upbringing? On how people raise their children? On *society?*

[@dreadtolivewithoutChrist]

K Ren Out of curiosity, are you by chance a “professional”?

[@bigshmitty169]

These people ragging on kids down here are the same people who bitch about the 2008-9 recession affecting the housing prices of 2019

[@TheBoxingNinja]

And people complained about the prequels, at least they made sense. I'm sorry, but why would a character that refused to kill his evil father but try to kill his nephew because he may turn bad.

[@SalvLav]

The prequels made sense? The fuck? kzbin.info/www/bejne/fKmupY2jhsyrqKs&t

[@TheBoxingNinja]

SalvLav I painfully listened to that entire video. He never once said a reason they don't make sense. If you expect me to watch all 7 Parts you're crazy if you have one short video that you know will show your point well enough, send that link to me.

[@SalvLav]

Really? You're willing to make false statements but aren't willing to watch a carefully made autopsy series showing all the reasons why what you said wasn't true? You're a real treasure aren't ya.

[@TheBoxingNinja]

SalvLav I'd rather watch episode 8 again than watch 7 episodes with his voice being that way.

[@Spiiiderrr]

The prequels had so much less logic errors than 7 and 8 It's really headscratching how the characters act like completely removed from all of their motivations Especially in 7 there is in almost every scene someone doing something really strange

[@OldCyrilTheGamingGrandpa]

As an old fart puppet who complains about Star Wars, I approve of this review! Subbed.

[@VoxisProductions]

Lovely to meet a fellow fart.

[@reverendrico5631]

I remember when they killed the EU. I instantly said “and nope”.

[@TallBob1962]

I bow to those who predicted this when the sale of Lucasfilm was announced. You were right. Sadly, you were right.

[@gigachud666]

TallBob1962 sorry about it. I'd hoped I was wrong.

[@mmaGambit]

TallBob1962 thank u thank u. I am more sad that i saw it coming. R.I.P star wars ......😢

[@Calbrea]

Disney creates nothing of value itself so this was predictable, I am so sorry to be correct.

[@TheDastard]

TallBob1962 The concept of Disney owning Star Wars is entirely anti-thetical to the very soul of the Star Wars franchise. Most people forget, but George Lucas FIERCELY resisted studio ownership of Star Wars from the very beginning. There's a famous story about hiw, during the production of The Empire Strikes Back, they literally ran out of money, & Lucas had to take out a loan or something like that to be able to pay for the production costs, ie, the paychecks of the people making the movie.

[@CaptainMyCaptain33]

Never been bowed to before. Feels weird. Get up.

[@jamesjames3005]

This is by far the best review i have seen for the last Jedi, accurate, cohesive, funny and it lasted the correct amount of time almost the antithesis of the film itself. This was almost like a mini condensed Plinkett review, the view count is way below what it deserves.

[@yobolion20]

James james it's way better than Red Letter Media's recent rambling criticisms of the film!

[@StillAtMyMoms]

Plinkett is overrated AF. Mainstream bullshit. The AVGN of movies.

[@Hirnlego999]

Plinkett is king.

[@cahg3871]

I enjoy these critique posts more then the actual movies.That is telling and indicative of just how lousy movies are now. If it’s Disney,it sucks.

[@yusefendure]

Fuckleberry Finn. That is just hilarious.

[@yusefendure]

Thanks. Very funny.

[@DeathBringer769]

The reference was clearly to Huckleberry Finn... so no, I DO think Fuckleberry Finn was the proper interpretation, lol.

[@Totalfreedomliving]

“Dangerously high intake of soy and avocados.” 😂😂😂👍🏻

[@MegaThrasher95]

Anubis22774 I spit out my coffee during that part 😂😂

[@nicholsjoshua15]

Avacodoes are tasty, just add some garlic; hot pepper sauce; lime juice; and serve with corn chips. Soy on the other hand, does indeed taste like shit.

[@eccentricthinker142]

@@nicholsjoshua15 Soy is perfectly fine, you just need to defat, pressure extrude, and rehydrate in a glutamate bath and broth and you have tasty chili. Or you can ferment and deep fry... Don't forget the deep frying

[@TheNefastor]

@@nicholsjoshua15 the only good soy is black soy, but I guess it's too strong for the casual soyboy. You don't find it everywhere but if you do, try it. It's the difference between decaf and italian espresso. It actually has a taste, too... other than the taste of wet napkin.

[@martind5653]

Mark Hamill was Luke Skywalker for 40 years and they completely destroyed his legacy in like... 15 minutes of screen time?

[@zoltanz288]

No. jizzneeee did that.

[@TheMedievalNerd]

Luke fades away like a hot fart. LOL! So accurate!

[@lucapeyrefitte6899]

The Medieval Nerd 😂 😂

[@Jericko427]

"...and can use her overbite to open beer bottles." I'm dying.

[@DeathBringer769]

I'm glad someone had the balls to point it out instead of yet another comment like "Oh my god, she's so cute! Let me turn my brain off and judge her solely on looks and not on merit, and then not even realize that's what I'm doing!"

[@Jericko427]

She's got that fishmouth, feminist sneer. I'd still hit it, but id paper bag the lower half of her face.

[@Legionzzzz1]

To add insult to injury multiple things were directly ripped off of EU legends and Rian said he came up with them himself even though they had been around for decades before in books and comics. They destroyed several iconic characters along the way. And they had the Gaul to call us sexist and racists for not liking the movie even though many of us loved the female characters in the EU such as Mara Jade who fans have been begging to be made canon and Lando a smooth as silk black smuggler is one of the most franchises most beloved characters.

[@micalzoncillo249]

to be fair, lando is the only black character with actual "character" in the entire franchise.

[@leonrobinson8180]

@@micalzoncillo249 Mace is pretty cool. He doesn't have the depth of Lando, but neither does Boba Fett.

[@fr2331]

I'm glad I'm not the only one that sees that the real problem here is Kathleen Kennedy.

[@ordinarydevin]

Kathberg Kennestien. Every. Single. Time.

[@JasonMatsoukas]

Nepotism wins

[@brantinghamjohn]

The end shot with Mark Hamill pretty much sums it up... I feel bad for the guy. He hates this movie as much as we do...

[@mattdavis7224]

Poor Mark, the one chance to come back to something he obviously loved and embraced only to have his character and it’s lore ‘raped in a ditch’ by Rian Johnson and Cathleen Kennedy. I really feel for him but at least he had the balls to tell the world this movie was fucked and the fans still come out respecting and loving Mark Hamill and the character Luke Skywalker, not that imposter he was forced to portray in this movie.

[@sailorbychoice1]

@@mattdavis7224 Of course, if he really disagreed with what they were doing to his character he could have said, "No!" turned down the money and told them to find another actor~~~ Granted, it's a shxt-ton of money, but I don't think Mark is exactly poor anymore; doesn't look like he's had to skip too many meals. A major actor walking away from production just might have awakened another kind of force...

[@commanderosis435]

@@sailorbychoice1 he signed a contract and Disney was not going to let him get out of it. Their corporate lawyers would have fucked him so hard. He signed on before Disney owned the IP

[@sailorbychoice1]

@@commanderosis435 Do you really think _Disney_ would want the kind of public relations associated with suing a major actor when his legal stance would be the script was written so badly the character they want him to portray is no longer the character he signed up to play?

[@commanderosis435]

@@sailorbychoice1 they have more money than he does and way better lawyers. I'd have to see the contract but I'm guessing it wasn't worth the hassle to him.

[@brav0wing]

Ruin Jonhson to Mark Hammil: Ha ha, what a story Mark!

[@starcrafter13terran]

"I did not write her into a corner! I DID NOT!" "Oh hi mark!"

[@niriusbosc7973]

Mark's face at the end says it all.

[@projectzoogunner8474]

Nicolas046 Absolutely

[@Sacrilege83]

It breaks my heart.

[@jlang2845]

His look summarizes exactly how I felt walking out of the theater.

[@morscoronam3779]

First time I saw that clip, I was legit worried that Hamil was suffering a heart attack or planning to murder Rian Johnson. His expression is so dead, then he turns to look at Rian... I would give a winning lottery ticket to know what Mark was thinking right there.

[@siramirez7]

What's the name of the song playing at the end? It fits so well with Mark's face!

[@JorraneRei]

“The movie is bollocks” Glad to see someone call it like it is.

[@galaxysurfer1122]

How did I miss this hilarious (and brilliant) review?! Subscribed! Please do more when possible! Thank you.

[@Adino1]

This review crushed every argument I've heard from the fanboy defenders. This was the most brutal savaging of a movie that I've ever seen.

[@maliciousbugman]

Not even RedLetterMedia's review did TLJ justice, especially claiming that Ray wasn't a Mary Sue (though to be fair this was a Half in the Bag).

[@Adino1]

@@maliciousbugman And all these years later they give Kenobi a glowing review. Yeah, funny guys but I can't take them seriously anymore

[@justforever96]

Fair enough, Despot didn't exist when you made this comment. But no one is as savage as Despot. In my humble opinion.

[@twistwrzd]

I wish I had paid to see this instead of The Last Jedi.

[@morscoronam3779]

Wzrd Well, too bad. Voxxis Productions has a strict no ads/monetization and no Patreon policy... Why aren't there more channels like this? 😞

[@peterjohnson1332]

Yep. Me too.

[@habeebdurdana3196]

Hope you are doing well professor! Don’t worry about regular uploads. Quality of your videos are phenomenal. Waiting for your videos is worth it’s weight in gold! Take care of your health. Hope you do more live streams. Loved them too.

[@brandondavis1232]

The best damn review on the internet!!!! I am laughing so hard my sides hurt. You nailed it!! OMG!!! Using her her overbite to open beer bottles!!! I thought it was just me! You just got my sub!

[@ZeroHxC07]

Rip and tear, until it is done.

[@crazyrabbits]

Kathleen Kennedy: "I'm willing to take full responsibility for the events of the last two years, but you must understand - our interest in the franchise was purely for the betterment of the fanboys." (George Lucas looks down at the corpse of Han Solo, then looks back up, hands shaking with rage) Kennedy: "Everything has clearly gotten out of hand now, yes... but it was worth the risk. I assure you." (Lucas smashes everything around him)

[@ZeroHxC07]

Epic E1M1 plays in the background

[@generic_sauce]

*The Star Wars Equivalent of Columbine* This made me laugh harder than it should have, subscribed!

[@Sweetness71775]

School shooting jokes are like school shooting victims: They never get old.

[@initforthestory7405]

#NOTMYLUKE

[@bschlude]

Does anyone find the irony in an anti-capitalist message existing in a movie produced by DISNEY?

[@mercurialsilver5688]

bschlude It kind of IS worth bringing up that the Land of the Free sells weapons to over 70% of our planet’s dictators.

[@davidjames579]

I think they're subtly encouraging you to pirate their movies

[@browngirlinaclownworld2077]

After years of seeing Che Guevara™ t-shirts sell like hotcakes, it really doesn't phase me.

[@nunchuckfilms]

@@mercurialsilver5688 what does that have to do with capitalism? Asking for a friend.

[@Jessica-el5yx]

Yeah... Isn't that sort of like Heckler & Koch having an anti-war message?

[@sammywhite5127]

13:50 actually no Han's estranged wife is from the new Disney stuff, also while the Luke clone thing sounds silly it's actually part of a really good story

[@AnonimusWho]

R.I.P STAR WARS

[@paulelliott8062]

"Beaten up by Muslims" I mean Sand People - what's the difference?" poop my pants funny

[@ptaylor5014]

He He it sounds so fucking funny :) love it

[@theheadshotstudio9254]

"Mannequin Skywalker" I love this channel

[@GraveMistake1]

It’s because Disney has a political agenda and I am moving on. Star Wars is dead.

[@Terminalsanity]

I don't give two shits about their political agenda, George Lucas had one of those too most film makers invariably do if for no other reason than most people in general invariably have their own political agenda. None of them entirely sync up with my own politics because I form my own political opinions on my own and I do not watch films to be validated I go to them to be entertained and that's the real problem with The Last Jedi the story is crap to the point of detracting from experience. I'm fine with watching a film with a political message I don't agree with so long as it serves a good story. I could 100% agree with Disney's politics in The Last Jedi and I'd still be rolling my eyes at every overt plot hole, dropped storyline and complete failure to move the story and the characters forward. I thought the bit with Yoda saying failure is the ultimate teacher was ironic because by not letting Rey fail and grow from the experience she's not a very compelling character and so will never endure as a character the way Luke has. Seriously Wonder Woman was a strait up demi God in the Wonder Woman and even she comes off as more relatable than Rey because she not depicted as flawless doesn't know everything and makes mistakes.

[@Terminalsanity]

Well I still don't care and I think its silly that you're complaining about people telling other people how and what to think on the one hand while telling how and what I should think and feel on the other. I can think for myself, thank you very much. You want to be pissed at hamfisted politic messaging in a film that's your prerogative and I'll leave you to it.

[@TheBetabox]

Terminalsanity you're comparing poisonous identity politics and feminism to anti-authoritarianism and libertarianism? The former is what these new Star Wars movies push...the latter was what Lucas injected into the original and prequel trilogies subtly. I think you're an idiot, but your heart seems to be in the right place. Just stop trying to be so centrist, it's ultimately fatalistic.

[@Terminalsanity]

No I'm comparing two different films with political content worked into their stories one did so in a fashion that those political elements served the story and another that did the opposite resulting in a poor film. I don't give too shits about you think of me and I don't conform to any -isms or -ists I am a free thinker and its abundantly clearly you can't even imagine or entertain such a notion.

[@TheBetabox]

Terminalsanity sure, take the imaginary "High road"...although your point is speciously about 'political viewpoints' the clear distinction that one is positive and the other is negative is being totally ignored. Critical theory isn't a noble cause or objectively reasonable...it's a borderline nihilistic removal of oneself from issues which should be of utmost importance to oneself.

[@momtonat]

"She can use her overbite to open beer bottles" made my day.

[@greeneye5977]

You can’t tell me that “Luke drinking green breastmilk” scene wasn’t RJ trying to sh*t on Luke Skywalker because he hates the character. And props to Mark Hamill for being a true professional and doing everything this awful script asked him to do. He must’ve read that scene and nearly had a stroke.

[@meggrotte4760]

You know honestly I wouldn't be surprised if he was repulsed by it. that was one of the most disrespectful things that I could think of in that movie among many.

[@irulan9161]

13:27 Of course Disney would decide the expanded universe wasn't canon. If they incorporated these writer's ideas, then they would have to PAY them. Disney's not having that.

[@Akm72]

To be fair, most of the EU was a bit crap. None the less, if they're going to scrap it, they do need to do better. It's not as if they lack the time and budget to do better.

[@7adrianb]

To the maker of this video: You Sir, are a legend. You articulated precisely the debacle that is Disney Star Wars. If you ever happen to be in the Whitney Bay area, I will buy you a pint.

[@thepenultimateninja5797]

I'm at work listening to this on my headphones. I was eating peanuts, and at 10:45 I sort of snorted and choked, and half a peanut went up the back of my nose. My coworkers must have thought I was dying.

[@VoxisProductions]

Bless you.

[@thepenultimateninja5797]

@Nate Jones I'm not sure I understand the question. Is eating peanuts at work an unusual thing to do?

[@SkraggsCyclevlog]

"Star Wars equivalent of Columbine"... 😂😂😂

[@RRRRRRRRR33]

That was the best line, lol his writing is pretty fucking great

[@helmutstein1178]

I lost my whole shit when i heard that line

[@scottski02]

I didn't even realize until you said it that R2D2 does fuck all in this film. I SHOULD be mad about that, but seeing how horribly the other OT characters were treated in this film, maybe it's for the best that he was completely off the radar.

[@PiousMoltar]

R2 and C3PO both do fuck all and barely even appear. Weird.

[@DeathBringer769]

Basically they want to kill off or minimize the role of all the old characters solely in favor of the new, it seems. I get the plan "focus on the new generation!" but they didn't have to screw over the old so hard in the process to accomplish that. There's actually other ways but they don't want to see that, lol.

[@khamulthewack4732]

That's why he's my favorite character in the movie...

[@khamulthewack4732]

Nathan Holstrom it's all she's good for at this point. Certainly wasn't worth shit in the film. Carrie Fisher ought to be rolling in her grave.

[@joshfatal]

Want to get even more depressed? Think about how CHEWBACCA did fuck all in this film. He straight up shot Kilo Ren in the last movie. It's any wonder they didn't straight up blow the Falcon up with him in it in this movie.

[@henrikschmidt3964]

I have such respect for Mark Hamill for speaking out and not 'working' us. The Luke Skywalker character development was about as bad as it could have been.

[@SonnyAli1973]

"Beaten up by Muslims." As a Muslim, let me just say this...Bahahaahahaa!!! That's the funniest thing I've heard all year. Good one, mate.

[@ingikratzer9043]

LOLOLOLOLOL

[@Xeranx]

It was so unexpected. lol

[@ThrawnSr]

"Raped in a Ditch by Rian Johnson" I lost it.

[@FatalistCatalist]

It perfectly represents feminism. They want everything now and free.

[@KM-dk5gn]

They also want to think that they are better than men but don't want to do the work to become good themselves so they just steal every franchise created by a man, gender swap the main character and make mediocre hard or soft reboots of classic movies that were way better. Also, in Rise of Skywalker, Rey also steals a mans name too after stealing his legacy.

[@JoshuaKevinPerry]

@G Ren Obama was successful at tossing 10 million people from their homes and ensuring the elitely wealthy were saved from the Recession.

[@ShadowGaming-ft4fh]

@G Ren Hello again you fool, even if the characters were all male, people would say that it was a horrible movie that needed to be burned, and the biggest plot hole Rey is created as feminist propaganda as evident by Kathleens over the top advertising of the force as female which it isn't. The force doesn't care about gender, true some species are more receptive of the force but not genders and even if despite that and Rey was a man but the same in every way the force capabilities are still too broken and as such are detrimental to the story. Also the Last Jedi was a horrible movie where nothing made sense, the plot was a wreck and don't get me started on Rey in that film, even dear old Palpy was a wreck in that film and people used to like Palpy no one liked Rey so this was her last chance to actually try to get somebody, anybody to like her. Obama was Almost useless as a president and as far as I can tell Trump and Bush did better jobs, I'm not an American but from what I've seen that's the case. Also I think you had an editing error in saying feminist derangement syndrome in place of deranged feminists, the world isn't black and white and both sexes/genders have issues that until they are addressed together no one will support gender equality movement. Picture this a kid is lost in a crowd separated from there mother so a woman notices the kid's distress and tries to help the kid find the mother. Replace that with a man and their will be scrutiny placed upon him. Replacing that with teachers and how the male ones are suspected more when a parent first meets them, talk to male teachers if you don't believe some random chap on the internet. These are some base social problems to touch upon that can be noticed just by looking, dig more and you'll find much more issues.

[@starcrafter13terran]

special treatment along with equal treatment, so that things are NOT equal.

[@meggrotte4760]

@G Ren I'm sorry but these movies were terrible. It's not about their gender it's about the fact that these movies had no character Arc. It's like they're taking the originals and giving them a new look. These movies were supposed to be the conclusion to something that was started 30 years ago. John boyega who plays Finn he's a very good actor but his character was poorly written. Daisy Ridley can't act worth a damn. And the guy who plays Poe kept sexually harassing John boyega because he's gay

[@robertodelacruz7237]

HAHAHA That last line "Luke fades away like a hot fart...." makes me LOL

[@one8hundred1]

Nice Job. You speak exactly what I feel.

[@johnrodriguez5277]

Omg, I had to stop this several times cause I was laughing my ass off!!! Fades away like a hot fart?! 😂😂😂 I'm Rollin!!! Keep up the fantastic work!!! I'm gonna try and finish listening to this review!!! 2 freakin funny!

[@MDM-ej7tr]

I just hate how politics seeps into everything. You can't criticize Mary Sue Rey without being called a misogynist and a sexist.

[@TheDruidKing]

This is the SJW modus operandi. When logic fails, they resort to personal attacks. Fortunately, they also end up attacking each other. Time will tell, KK will go. Decent, reasonable, egalitarian human beings will prevail.

[@rodney2x48]

The way The Last Jedi handles politics and social commentary makes the political and social stuff in the prequels seem fucking subtle, and the prequels had entire scenes dedicated to senate debates between alien politicians.

[@emhu2594]

That’s not what politics means. Get a dictionary. I agree Rey should have gotten training. The last Jedi was moronic. Disney wants to make money on it anyways, which is why they paid off all the critics and are calling all the disappointed fans bots.

[@KutWrite]

I just have to find out where the "Mary Sue' moniker came from. I figured out what it means. I'm just curious where it's from and how it caught on instantly.

[@ConfusedRainbow1]

It came from one of the earliest fandoms--a Star Trek fanfiction. Mary Sue was perfect at everything. Smarter than Spock, etc. edit: It wasn't a serious fanfic.

[@tribacioustee2846]

"Ah yes, spoilers!" You are the best

[@MrWeedCat7070]

No wonder they made the expanded universe "non-canon". They could only DREAM to make something so unique and creative.

[@MattMusicianX]

PROPERTY OF HARVEY WEINSTEIN DO NOT REPLICATE roflmao

[@TroyTempest63]

Congratulations on over 100,000 views, Professor.

[@privatevoidkeeper3775]

all those creative differences probably could've made a better movie.

[@jaharv111]

The "difference" is the actual creativity vs KK's complete lack thereof

[@Debicus]

Maybe. Maybe not. Disney refuses to show the filming making process as it is, and goes "Everything was fun and happy go lucky!"

[@superitgel1]

At the end, Mark Hamill's expression reminds me of sad Ben Affleck.

[@CeroAshura]

superitgel I felt bad. Mark likely thought nothing could further damage his beloved trilogy after the catastrophic prequel run. You can actually see contempt in his eyes when he looks at that hack.

[@DanielDiCenso]

(Singing) "Hello darkness my old friend...."

[@baburik]

more like Vietnam Flashbacks Dog

[@honestred7600]

Have I ever told you the story of Darth Porgus the Marketable? So mediocre was he in the dark arts that he could even keep a franchise from dying.

[@cheevosmith892]

You know, this is actually a great review.

[@dsc4061]

They killed Star Wars. In fact they killed it then took a shit on it.

[@GrandMasterAbe]

Whoever wrote that screenplay, spent way too much time on Tumblr and erotic fanfic.

[@VaderPopsVicodin10]

Dude, I just found your channel, and it's friggin hilarious.. sharp wit and biting jokes! Awesome, man.. awesome. Subbed.

[@VoxisProductions]

Thanks Vader! Welcome to Smack Talk.

[@VaderPopsVicodin10]

​@@VoxisProductionsRight on, man thanks. Great work and keep on keepin on! 💯

[@chuppisensei6324]

"Nope, not yet; gets beaten up by muslims." Great line, great delivery!!

[@kevinhill8193]

The are Sand People, racist!

[@louisbabycos106]

Thanks for confirming my suspicions on Kathleen Kennedy, "the force is female". This explains a lot on why the character Luke Skywalker was treated the way he was. They had to sacrifice his character like a metaphorical "virgin princes " or a "Mayan corn king " upon the alter of political correctness and misandry.

[@mister_john]

“With 120% more nihilism” 😂

[@capitans12]

lol 9:40 “Property of Harvey Weinstein”

[@Bosanovadude1]

capitans12 we know how daisy got the part

[@collegerebel]

"Carrie Fisher is on the rebel base, having mistaken the planets' salt for cocaine, so now the stakes are high." I had to stop the video to laugh at that😂

[@jaredticer6255]

This is the funniest rip on new SW saga i’ve seen so far. Not sure why it took so long to show up in my feed...

[@Sweetness71775]

The Critical Drinker has some funny shit as well.

[@SottMediaChannel]

Some hilarious comments in this one. Thanks!

[@shanosummesteros9563]

Star Wars equivalent of Columbine :D You have a new sub.

[@igorivanov299]

Shanos Ummesteros What columbine?

[@lanesteele240]

Yep. I hit the button directly after that

[@mikespearwood3914]

Igor Ivanov an infamous American high school massacre.

[@garver5833]

And now 2 years later the next movie is set to be even shittier than this garbage was

[@DuelTubeChannel]

And you still gonna pay for it

[@garver5833]

@@DuelTubeChannel I'm gonna stay home and check out the Netflix Witcher show

[@DuelTubeChannel]

@@garver5833 good boy. Enjoy it before sjw put their hands on that either

[@Sweetness71775]

I'm just waiting the The Boys season 2.

[@soulrebel6309]

I'm from the future...you were right. Its shit👍

[@danielclark-hughes692]

"You ever heard of 'show don't tell', you hack?" 😄

[@AAhmou]

The same thing was said to georges lucas and the prequels.

[@craigmanning2439]

Yea, but not my favorite RUSH song. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gGWUcounaJKAmZI

[@danielclark-hughes692]

Craig Manning I always preferred Tom Sawyer. Or YYZ depending on my mood...

[@craigmanning2439]

YYZ for sure. Tired of hearing Tom Sawyer. Good song but played too much. Xanadu is my favorite. Then of courses temple of Syrinx. Ready player one. Thumbs up for knowing what I am talking about.

[@ENIGMVTIK]

Craig Manning But what about... The Analog Kid?!