a poem. MY BOOK: goo.gl/jysTna Free copy: goo.gl/pGnEpf Also find me here: Twitter: / ashhardell Insta: / ashhardell Tumblr: / ashhardell Second Channel: / ashleymardell
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@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
Im tired of straight people pretending they might be gay like it's nothing. I poem about it a little above :)
@rhysclarke14758 жыл бұрын
Ashley Mardell it's one of the best slam poems I've heard!
@justintuttle60928 жыл бұрын
Is this a joke? What if an individual isn't sure of themselves yet? Is it no longer okay to be confused by your own sexuality? You have previously posted videos on how complex gender and sexual identity are. I really want this to be a response to another youtuber's questionable videos and not a general statement. I'm not a fan of the angry, non-inclusive tone.
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
I think you misunderstood the piece. It explicitly says Im addressing people who can "unquestionably say they are NOT gay." Thus, if you were questioning this poem is not about you. It's about appropriation which is 100% different than people who are genuinely curious and exploring. And Im not a fan of you're tone-policing tone.
@Luchabul8 жыл бұрын
I have struggled for with my sexuality while being raised in a staunchly pro-conservative house. Out of fear for repulsion for what I feel, for sake of ideals in which I no longer hold any zeal. Spending years of my life trying to hide what is real. Five years of my life trying to conform to their ideals. Finally being able to be out on my own, yet still only half an hour from home. In college I can better represent the feeling of which I no longer wish to
@AtlanticGiantPumpkin8 жыл бұрын
Ashley Mardell I seriously want to see you featured on Button Poetry one day. Please. That would be AMAZING. YOU ARE SO FREAKING GOOD.
@Clisare8 жыл бұрын
Great poem, great point. Fed up of seeing people using 'coming out' to get clicks when that's not what they are doing. Coming out is not something to use to get views, it's a big deal for those who have to actually do it for real. I thought about doing a parody and then I didn't because I realised I didn't want to criticise the problem by adding to it.
@aces5thalternateaccount4645 жыл бұрын
Truth, 2 years late though.
@jazmynbloomfield-nishimura76408 жыл бұрын
my stepdad(he's a straight, white cis man) always jokes about "identifying with a lamppost" its that you don't get the stress about whether or not you will be accepted because you are in a majority. instead, there are people like us, who might not even in our own community because we are that little bit different
@mr_beezlebub39858 жыл бұрын
Don't oppress those who identify as lamp posts. It's racist and ableist
@skylarclark90258 жыл бұрын
That's really shitty, my step dad is the same way. I think you just learn to ignore it (though not something that I'm great at).
@FushiguroMegumi798 жыл бұрын
I feel like people like that are making fun of the various "kin's" of the world. Like trash-kin. and cinnamon-bun-kin. Those people who identify as things they simply cannot be, because they're inanimate objects.
@sydney36568 жыл бұрын
Cry me a river
@skylarclark90258 жыл бұрын
Sydney Owens Are you here just to be an instigator?
@ZachEvan8 жыл бұрын
a little louder for those in the back please.
@ZachEvan8 жыл бұрын
ps loved this.
@rosebean59338 жыл бұрын
Zach & Evan what about the ones in the front? Our ears hurt
@chxwee8 жыл бұрын
Zach & Evan Can I like this comment more than once? lol
@gstar91096 жыл бұрын
Zach & Evan there is something called TURNING THE VOLUME UP 😎
@ant.2426 жыл бұрын
Amen
@ReadHeadPat8 жыл бұрын
YO THIS. THIS!!!!!! My mom even asked me, "can I come out as a parent of a gay kid?" and I was like mom I know you have good intentions but THIS. IS. NOT. ABOUT. YOU. Coming out takes SO much courage and energy and DOES NOT BELONG TO STRAIGHT CIS PEOPLE. Also the whole aesthetic of this video is A+++
@ReadHeadPat8 жыл бұрын
I don't doubt that calling oneself an ally takes guts, trust me I've done it before. But NCOD is not the time to do it. That's like me announcing to the world that I'm an ally of Black people on #Blackout days. Blackout was created to empower and spread visibility of Black people, not their white allies, who don't need that visibility. These days are created specifically for people in those marginalized groups. Coming out as an ally on that day (not really as an ally to the LGBTQ+ community as a whole either) is basically saying "this is hard for me too." which yeah, obviously allyship is hard, but it will never compare to being a part of the actual group being marginalized. It's not like she regularly talks about being an ally either, she chose this day specifically to announce to the world that she's a decent human instead of literally any other day of the year.
@evag-s51778 жыл бұрын
It's awesome that you didn't have to worry about that! I know people who are in very different situations. I have friends who were raised in an environment where their parents openly talked about how homosexuality is a mental illness and a perversion. When you're raised in that kind of environment, you're going to have anxiety. Even for me, I have a supportive family, but I have a high level of anxiety in general. Any time I have conversations about myself with people, I fear they will judge me. That's just who I am. So it's not always easy.
@heytherespookyface8 жыл бұрын
Just because you had a chill experience doesn't mean it's always so for everyone. I came out as bi to my family and they were like 'yeah, we know... moving on", however, some LGBT youth get kicked out, beaten up and disowned. They come out because they are tired of hiding and tired of living in fear of what will happen when they do, or if someone finds out before they are ready...
@csharpmajor48108 жыл бұрын
+Mark Donald I can't speak for other people, but I can use myself as an example. I want to come out because people assuming I'm straight grates a lot. Because of small stuff - like just assuming I'll end up with a guy - and for bigger stuff, like straight friends talking about the lgbtq+ community as 'those people,' or deliberately excluding myself from spaces with my queer friends because I'm not supposed to be there. Also just the stress of appearing straight when you're not, particularly if you're not a fan of straight up (puns, sorry) lying. As for the anxiety around coming out - again for me personally - I grew up in a very homophobic household, so even though I know that it's not a big deal, it's been ingrained in me that it's /wrong/ and /bad/ and that telling anyone is a bad idea. And also, like, just the fear of judgement, from people and the world at large. Trying to reconcile these two thought processes - wanting to be open, and never telling - can cause a lot of anxiety. I hope that made some sort of sense? Also I'm glad that your coming out went so chill - good things :)
@gracec68716 жыл бұрын
Mark Donald being LGBTQ+ is a huge part of some people’s lives, and for others it isn’t. for me, it was incredibly difficult to come out to my friends since many of them were super religious and had said things before that were outwardly homophobic. even now, I’m still not out to my family because it’s terrifying to come out. that’s good that it wasn’t bad for you but that’s not necessarily the same for everyone else.
@redacted63068 жыл бұрын
After two years of remaining in the closet and trying to run from my gender, I finally not only accepted myself, but also worked up the courage to come out to most of my family last Tuesday. I was exatatic. I returned to school with a new wardrobe to fit my androgeneous nonbinary soul and an ace ring to proudly show on my middle finger. No longer was I scared, let others see me for what I was. I didn't care. But... that's easier said than done. I spent my day in confidence, until somebody, who I thought was a good aquaintence, asked me, "Did you know, they added a Q+ to LGBT? Why not just LGBT+?" I tried to explain that it's different to each individual, to which he responded, "My problem isn't with them," (oh goody), "it's with the complexity. Why not just YDY: you do you? Who cares?" "Well," I said trying to make conversation, "some people add an A you know" I add an A. This lead to questions. Which lead to weird looks. Which lead to, "Asexuals? Don't you think that's rediculous? Why take a word that's already in use? Why not unsexuals? Are they amoebas?" I stayed quiet, nervously twisting my ring, as he continued to laugh and talk about it. Shame it. Then he turned to me and said, "I feel like you're judging me." I left the classroom with a knot in my stomach. When it came time to change for cross country, I slipped out of my boxer briefs to put on the more acceptable pair of panties I'd packed just in case. When I got home, I slipped my ring from my finger, no longer proud. The emotion in your poem, although for different reasons, stirred up emotion in me that I tried to ignore. I wish I could go back and do things differently. I wish I'd had the nerve to tell him the truth about me: "You ask why not YDY? Perhaps such an acronym would work for somebody who is accepted by the society around them, but the rest of us have to cling desparately to the labels that give us a place to belong when people like you were too busy to do so yourselves. Have we gone to far? Maybe. Probably, if going too far means goings as far as it takes for me to be comfortable with the life I've been given. Even if that means I've long since stepped over the edge and am now plummeting towards the ground even though I'm afraid of heights, but I'm surrounded by people just like me. So it's okay. They have also gone too far, and together we learn that we don't need to fall. It's people like you who tell us otherwise. Without your "universal philosophy", telling us the labels we claim as our own are weighing us down, we could learn to fly. Because those labels are our life line, our comfort, our wings. You say I'm quiet because I'm judging you, but I'm quiet because you're judging me." I know this is already long and drawn out, but I just wanted to say thank you, Ash. Your videos not only helped me identify my gender, but they also made me over all the more comfortable with being me. I wouldn't have accepted myself or come out had it not been for you, and I am forever greatful. Even though I don't quite know how, your video today allowed me to cast aside the insecurities placed by someone else. Thank you.
@oliverhogan55748 жыл бұрын
Makayla Nance this is really good and I know you probably didn't mean for this to be poetry, but can I use this at my schools poetry slam? I'm also Ace/genderqueer and I'd love for other people to hear this. I'll definitely credit you.
@redacted63068 жыл бұрын
Elizabeth Hogan, yes I'd love for others to hear that, and it means a lot that you would want to share it with others. I would love to here how the poetry slam turns, if you have time to send a reply afterwards.
@redacted63068 жыл бұрын
Elizabeth Hogan also, there was another part to my "response" but I ended up leaving it out because I thought it might offend somebody. I don't know if you'd want to use it as well, though.
@redacted63068 жыл бұрын
Elizabeth Hogan sure, that sounds great ^_^
@elliothennessy83608 жыл бұрын
That was really powerful. Thank you for sharing.
@annachiara25158 жыл бұрын
I am crying. This is sooo good Thank you ash.
@annachiara25158 жыл бұрын
Also you look so good w/ glasses
@staticpalms678 жыл бұрын
|-/
@corin75718 жыл бұрын
Annachiara , |-/
@aliciatysick64078 жыл бұрын
+
@Thegreatestmagicfish8 жыл бұрын
+
@CindyyBoofiveohh7 жыл бұрын
I just can't wait till no one has to come out
@Nico-Callahan5 жыл бұрын
Cindy Damron I know right!!
@meganblackwood47835 жыл бұрын
Same here !!
@jadastevens47394 жыл бұрын
Never going to happen
@jadastevens47394 жыл бұрын
Keep waiting
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
ALSO, if you like the music, it was a custom score by the AMAZINGLY TALENTED: t.co/SAbmejT073
@ErinFlatFingers8 жыл бұрын
Ashley Mardell AWWWWW thank you so much!!!! You are amazing!!! ☺️
@Nnmnnncchnb8 жыл бұрын
Ashley Mardell ERIN IS AMAZING
@Sentariana8 жыл бұрын
Ashley Mardell I did really like the music!
@izzyturner80278 жыл бұрын
I LOVE ERIN! Also, this was truly amazing!!
@theheartyaerie8 жыл бұрын
So you don't want straight people to come out? Isn't that just kind of adding to hetero normatives?
@dualitysDownfall8 жыл бұрын
Your poetry fascinates me in a way I can't understand, but I love it and it always leaves me wanting more. The regularly irregular patterns of rhyme and alliteration are some of my favorite aspects, but I especially find that all your ideas, all the emotion and opinion that you share in it, I wholeheartedly agree with. Guys I think she's a poetry magician.
@halabaster22516 жыл бұрын
*they :)
@natashadawson17666 жыл бұрын
*they 😊
@claragulick1206 жыл бұрын
Actually, Ash specifically said that there was no pronoun preference, in the video All About Pronouns
@FlyKiwi8 жыл бұрын
That was beautiful, Ash. I'm glad you did share that with the world. I get particularly angry about queerbaiting and girls/guys saying "well maybe I'm bi!" because my first relationships with women were with people who basically took me for a joy ride to get the attention they wanted then turned around and "realised they were straight". Speaking purely from the perspective of a bisexual woman; I struggle so much to feel accepted in queer spaces for straight people to then turn around and wear my identity like a costume for a weekend. My sexuality is not a tourist attraction, it's not an episode of Star in Their Eyes "Tonight Brenda, I'm going to be Bisexual!" It is an ever losing battle to be fetishized by one community, demonized by another, and accepted by neither. When straight people 'play gay' or decide "I'm bi today!" they invalidate my place in the queer community and prove I'm just a sideshow character in theirs.
@ardenchaplin3498 жыл бұрын
LilaRose89 you explain being bi in such an incredible way What a perspective I'm sorry for the majority of the minority (lesbians & gays) treating you badly You are one of us and you should be welcomed as one but not everyone gets that
@merekoayee77998 жыл бұрын
honestly I'm I'm questioning but isn't that part of exploring my sexuality. like I think I may be bi due to being attracted to females but I dont know. I don't get it... I guess. well I like the comment nonetheless
@FlyKiwi8 жыл бұрын
Mereko ayee Being questioning is a part of discovering who you are, it's not pretending or queerbating. It's really tricky not knowing where you belong. My comment is about people who KNOW they are straight and still chose to play with someone else's identities.
@stephaniemariehanson17388 жыл бұрын
I feel you for I really do. I'm sorry you feel taken advantage of. It's not okay and it's hurtful. But people who are questioning and have not come out, (like myself) are afraid to come out for the fear of being labelled as "not gay enough", "just faking", or "it's just a phase". We aren't yet "confidently clearly queer" yet. People also have the right to realize maybe they weren't actually bi, but were only feeling attracted to the same gender (maybe it truly was a phase which is entirely possible #ragingteenagehormones) but couldn't see themselves in a long term relationship. I'm terrified because, what if I'm not actually bi and I come out and it feels like the right thing to do at the time? But in the long run I turn out to be truly straight? I love Ashley and I've followed her for a long time, but I don't agree with the way the video was made. It wasn't inclusive. I do agree with most points she makes
@LittleChaoticMonsta8 жыл бұрын
LilaRose89 it's hurtful I know, BUT it's maybe not intentional if they don't know what it means to you. Like I had a sexual relationship with my best friend and she would constantly say things like "I wish you were a boy than we'd be together" and even though I hadn't come to term with my own sexuality and I wouldn't admit I was in love with her, it hurt me. But she didn't know that. I could have been like her. Or I could have not been in love with her and just have taken advantage of her experimenting. I don't actually know if she is bi (and was just way further in the closet) or straight, but it doesn't matter anymore. It was painful but also fun. It opened some doors and it closed some. I just feel like it's better to ban anger from thing that happened in the past and focus on not letting those things happen again in the future.
@lucicorinne2978 жыл бұрын
I am 11 year olds. I am not 6. I am not 9. I am not 4. I am 11. And most people would say, you don't know yourself yet. I know enough about myself and what I feel, that I have confidentially come out to myself as bisexual. Now I know the whole comment section is literally going to rip me apart, go head idc at all tbh. I have liked my bestfriend for the past 3 months, and she's a girl a FEMALE, and so am I. And there is nothing wrong with that situation at a young age. I love this poem. People who are straight pretend to come out all the time. My school is K-8, so I know people in 7th and 8th grade who have come out. I am in 5th grade. A lot of people have told me I tell people I'm bisexual for "attention." I have only told one person. And that person is one of my bestfriends. (Not the girl I like.) People in my grade, pretty much always think being gay, being bisexual, being a lesbian, being pansexual (they don't even know what that is lol), being attracted to your own gender, is wrong
@lucicorinne2978 жыл бұрын
And I obviously disagree, but my bestfriend sticks up for me, because she's the only one that knows. I have come out to myself. I have done that and I'm proud of that. That opinion I know for a fact was built inside of me. However, I'm a normal fifth grader, Going to school everyday, Doing homework every night, Practicing for a play everyday after school, And keeping these things to myself, for the time being, Until I'm confident ENOUGH; to share it with other people instead of just one person.
@lucicorinne2978 жыл бұрын
ALSO I HAVE CHILLS BECSUSE OF THIS OM G
@emilyheller768 жыл бұрын
props to you girl! I didn't figure myself out until last year
@lucicorinne2977 жыл бұрын
Emmeroo it just depends on what you know when you know it. has nothing to do with age
@kitteridgesimpson81447 жыл бұрын
Emma Wingo I'm 11 and heavily identify as ace. I'm panromantic
@JeffAMiller178 жыл бұрын
Nailed it. Thanks for calling these things out.
@MichaelRizzi8 жыл бұрын
THIS WAS SO GOOD! I enjoyed this and related to the emotions so much. Thank you for making this.
@RileyJayDennis8 жыл бұрын
yassssssss call them out girl 👏👏👏👏
@Probably.Prosperity8 жыл бұрын
I'm straight, and I agree with you. People should stop putting "coming out" in their title if they aren't actually coming out
@jason-anthonycurtis23968 жыл бұрын
Whoa. Always blown away. Your poetry is incredible.
@itsKaityCat8 жыл бұрын
Ah! I have been on a train with no internet for about the last 24 hours. This is the first thing I used my phone signal for. WORTH IT. This is Amazing Ash. I don't think you seemed too angry. It was a proper amount of anger in my honest opinion. Good job. Seriously.
@vofenn8 жыл бұрын
My coming out ended up a huge fight and me homeless at 15 haha.
@niftylimabean55938 жыл бұрын
vofenn Jeez, that sucks man. You're better off somewhere with people who will accept you. I hope everything works out for you, and I hope you're doing okay.
@linky00648 жыл бұрын
vofenn holy shit! That's... wow, I can't relate. I'm normally pretty empathetic, but I just can't imagine what that's like. I know this probably sounds dumb, but, like, are you okay at this current time? As in, are you still homeless/moving from place to place? Or are you like 40 something and this is just a stupid question out of nowhere?
@imperfectlife99188 жыл бұрын
vofenn I'm actually younger than 15 and I think my parents will kick me out by the time I'm 16… they've found out I was transgender and pansexual twice. Both times didn't end up well… I'm rlly worried. Did everything work out for you?
@airohtheenby8 жыл бұрын
That really sucks mate. I hope you know that you are awesome and that the community has your back.
@KnightofGascogne8 жыл бұрын
Call Trevor project, seek for some lgbt+ association near you, or any ngo that could help just in case. Don't wait.
@monkeyluvr8 жыл бұрын
I live in a small town, and my school is INSANELY homophobic. I myself am gay, and genderqueer. And on the bus I constantly hear the horrible shit the students around me have to say, (they actively harass students). And I fear that they might find out. I know it sounds dumb, but I can't help it. Anyways, the point of me saying this is that I very much appreciate this video :')
@elliothennessy83608 жыл бұрын
Long Gone I don't think it sounds dumb. I totally understand. People are horrible, so your feelings are entirely justified.
@monkeyluvr8 жыл бұрын
Meghan Hennessy ah, thanks^_^ And yeah, people do suck.
@katie63848 жыл бұрын
I know this is really cliché and you've probably heard this a thousand times but please know it really does get better. As you get older people generally become more open minded and it's easier to cut people out of your life who are negative and hateful. One day you will be surrounded by people who bring you up, not push you down, but in the meantime stay strong
@monkeyluvr8 жыл бұрын
Katie xox aw, I actually teared up (that doesn't happen a lot xD) And, uh, thank you? I'm not sure how to reply to these sort of things:'3
@monkeyluvr7 жыл бұрын
***** You actually made me smile, thank you ^_^ And yes, I fully agree.
@sagezahnd31428 жыл бұрын
This poem really is wonderful, and I'm glad you decided to post it. Sometimes sharing anger is good. That's something wonderful about spoken word, it can be an outlet for whatever you're feeling. I've seen too many cishets trying to silence the lgbt+ community whenever we feel something negative. Too many people call themselves allies when we're waving rainbow flags, but get uncomfortable when we talk about our frustrations. Coming out is ours, we are allowed to be angry. Straight people "coming out" really does minimize the true struggle of coming out that lgbt+ people face.
@randomripoff1238 жыл бұрын
+
@adameve94388 жыл бұрын
Omg this is so true. I'm living in a Southeast Asian country where people are still misled by ignorance and fear of LGBTQIA. When I came out to my reverend parent, I was shaking, incredibly afraid that she will kick me out of the house (thankfully she didn't). I was living in constant fear back then, so it angers me when straight people are doing this. It's not something to joke about. Thanks for making this, Ash. Love it.
@GeeaRCee8 жыл бұрын
Hello. Which country from SEA are you? You're so brave for coming out! I still haven't gotten to come out yet, I also live in the SEA. I still have some judgemental immediate relatives that's why I am still hesitant about it.
@adameve94388 жыл бұрын
GeeCee Hi! I'm from Indonesia. Which country are you from? (You don't have to answer if you don't want to for safety reasons :)) Thank you. My parent was the type who avoids talking about it, so when there was a chance to bring it up, I thought I wouldn't get the chance anymore, so yeah. Idk why people here have just included LGBTQIA to DSM while the whole world is pulling it out of the DSM. Well I really hope one day you can come out in a safe environment over there. Do the people in your country use religion as an excuse (because that's what happens here)? Or is it only the social norms?
@GeeaRCee7 жыл бұрын
Adam Eve Sorry, just googled DSM and I am still not sure what DSM means. What does it mean? Both! I am scared of coming out because of both religion, and our social norm. Thanks! I do hope I could find that safe and right timing for me to come out to family.
@GeeaRCee7 жыл бұрын
Adam Eve Oh so that's what it is. Thank you for sharing your knowledge. There were lots of results on Google so I wasn't sure which one it was. Now I understand. Thank you, I won't lose hope.
@DeeDreamcatcher8 жыл бұрын
I'm absolutely jealous over your glasses. You pull them off so well! Also I envy your poem talents. 10/10 would poem again.
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
I LIKE YOUR PROFILE PIC :D
@shnugglebugs55243 жыл бұрын
God, I love you so much. This was beautiful. I got goosebumps when you said, “No one shudders at pictures of you and your partners wedding plans.” That was so beautiful
@kkilco8 жыл бұрын
i know this is off topic but damn those glasses look great on you
@froggyqueen14355 жыл бұрын
The who time I watched this, I kept screaming things like "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!" and "EXACTLY!!!!!!!!" Then my parents came in to see what I was watching... I wasn't really ready to come out... But it worked out! Thanks for this Ash!❤️❤️❤️ Luv you!❤️❤️❤️😊
@amberdavison45728 жыл бұрын
see, I'm scared to come out because I feel people will think I am making it up. anyways love ya ash ♥
@miscoo228 жыл бұрын
Exactly how I feel
@amberdavison45728 жыл бұрын
+lara_Weasley I'm pansexual agender and it's just so hard to explain to people sometimes!
@skylarclark90258 жыл бұрын
I feel the same way. I can't say how many times I've been called a special snowflake.
@JamieAshleyWoods8 жыл бұрын
Same! I’m genderfluid and polysexual, so no one would understand me either
@Sentariana8 жыл бұрын
Amber Davison, I have found that some people think I'm making it up. I'm Asexual, and the amount of times I've had to explain to people what that even is! Is ridiculous. But! Sometimes you are just accepted as you are. My mum, well, she doesn't fully accept me as Ace but she's stopped trying to argue against it. There is no pressure to come out. Test the waters a bit first. Talk to people about sexualities in general, explain what they are and feel out their opinions. Then, if you feel ready, you come out, and only to who you choose. *many hugs*
@larilaa8 жыл бұрын
I quite liked it. I like your poems a lot. Since this is not a KZbin only thing - it exists in pop culture and other human interactions - I felt like you could have taken the poem even further and give it a bit wider perspective. But that's just where my brain took me. You made very it precise and personal and that's cool too. You moved me. God. "If I could taste the convenience..."
@doggie15rat8 жыл бұрын
This. Really important.
@michel_chartier998 жыл бұрын
i think the anger is totally justified. Great poem!
@adrianamorix27778 жыл бұрын
How dare you remind me that the world needs to be a better place, you SJW. That was bitter sarcasm. I'm mocking the people who follow that kind of logic. I know that seems obvious to some of you, but I've gotten shit from people who didn't realize that in the past. I know tone of voice doesn't translate well over the net, but I think my word choice should've made it fairly obvious.
@elliothennessy83608 жыл бұрын
Amorix and your profile picture should help make it obvious, too
@DeathmetalPersian7 жыл бұрын
SJW's don't use logic. People who can't control their emotions try to control peoples behavior. Any doctor that finds a cancer will have it removed immediately. This is no different. Degenerate pseudo-intellectuals should be publicly mocked and purged from society. Wake the fuck up.
@adrianamorix27777 жыл бұрын
I lost track of what you were saying after the second sentence. What exactly was your reply directed at? The video? My comment? Both? Neither?
@anna-px2rw8 жыл бұрын
When I did come out as gay months and months ago (this was after I came out to my family) I was so scared of someone judging me and disowning me. All my childhood "friends" were making posts such as "I'm coming out as a Madagascar Lemur" and other ridiculous things like that. So I did what I thought would make me feel better. I knocked off all the people off my friends list who I knew would make my sexuality (and possible gender) a joke. I came out and everyone was accepting. I did get a bit of rudeness. but not hate.
@hexfloo8 жыл бұрын
I always love Ashley's poetry slam.
@theodawson94658 жыл бұрын
Would it be okay to recite this poem at a school function? With credit. I think it's really moving and could certainly change some people's minds
@saffodils8 жыл бұрын
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@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
yup :)
@maggiec19006 жыл бұрын
Ash Hardell hi Ash I just wanted to say you are the most adorable person ever also your channel is so incredibly amazing and you're the one that has made me understand that there are more genderfluids than me ily
@anieluong2698 жыл бұрын
thank you for this really strong peace it really puts my thoughts into words
@emmilytheengineer6 жыл бұрын
I used to think that coming out no big deal, there's no real reason for me to shove my sexuality in other people's faces. I ended up coming out to my sister who then came out to me. My mom is pretty open and accepting for the better part so my sister isn't really all that scared of what my mom might think but it's terrified what Dad might think she's bi. I'm just slightly nervous of what others might think because I'm Ace; then while having a conversation with my mom she talked about how much she hated Aces and I'm terrified. I almost feel bad for saying it. I feel like other orientations get a lot more hatred than aces do. My half-sister is pan she's terrified of what both of her parents would think, what her brother would think. The three of us sit bearing the burden together wondering if will ever be accepted by those we care about and I almost feel like my fear is illegitimate. Nonetheless I still fear.
@ayajune20886 жыл бұрын
Remember Emmily, you are never obliged to came out to anyone.
@QuinnRiley3608 жыл бұрын
This resonates with me a lot. I've been dealing with the whole "I'm coming out as straight" thing for years and it's really grating on every last nerve I have.
@dykerights42638 жыл бұрын
this poem gave me chills omg your writing and message are both so amazing
@ErinFlatFingers8 жыл бұрын
This turned out incredible! I'm so thankful that you thought of me to make music for this video. I had a lot of fun with that. This message of this video is so so so important and you did a phenomenal job of conveying it. :)
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
YOU NAILED IT!
@ClipsByLaura8 жыл бұрын
Erin Flat Fingers Your music is amazing and it flows so beautifully with the words. Chapeau!
@ErinFlatFingers8 жыл бұрын
Ashley Mardell Thank you sososo much!! :)
@ayeletdrago8 жыл бұрын
This is so beautiful and so so important. Thank you for this.
@paulhutze28608 жыл бұрын
oh my god if had to record that i'd start over so many times xD
@JD-eu5bp8 жыл бұрын
I used to watch you at speech competitions in high school. I adore the things you do on your channel, it's so beautiful to see the work you've written since then. much love ❤
@sarah55258 жыл бұрын
OMG Ash you look exceptionally cute today ;) Also great video, you never fail to make great content.
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
THANKS I GOT NEW GLASSES B)
@larajane15818 жыл бұрын
I wanted to come out 2 years ago. I'm still waiting for the right people.
@KnightofGascogne8 жыл бұрын
There's a little misunderstanding in the comments, so let's get this straight (pun intended) about what, IMHO, this video meant: 1 - QUEER BAITING SUCKS. Ash calls out queer baiting on KZbin by some a$$holes, but there's also TV shows. Tricking a community for cash sucks. It's using people's struggles for financial benefit, which is the opposite of what most lgbt+ youtubers do. No dirty tricks. 2 - COMING OUT AS LGBT+ IS NOT A JOKE. It's a huge part of someone's life, and let's be honest, It's rarely cool and casual. Most of the time, for the average person, It's an ordeal and It doesn't go well, at least with some friends and family, sometimes all of them. Turning this pinpoint in life into some youtube prank / joke is more than disrespectful. It's damaging. It confuses and shame into ridicule young queer ppl who then might stay in the closet. As for "coming out as straight"... come on, you know It's as wrong and as insulting as a white guy putting a "blackface" in front of real black people. That's brutal and not poetic, but at least I hope It was clear. Now, I may be wrong about Ash's intent. Ash, feel free to correct me if that's the case.
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
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@Ace-ht9dj8 жыл бұрын
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@Fruity_Cutie8 жыл бұрын
Wow. This is great. Your anger is just as valid as your more 'positive' emotions, so it's totally OK to put this out there.
@CoryTheSmurf8 жыл бұрын
Reading the comments on this video makes me think a lot of people missed the point of this video/poem.
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
ME TOO.
@rooqbranwen83058 жыл бұрын
Me three. Sadly.
@jiggydeki38228 жыл бұрын
Your poems get MY HEART RACING and my inner LGBTQ+ pride swelling, which is huge because I can never seem to relate to the amazing personalities and backstories of other LGBTQ+ members, often feeling completely detached from the community as a whole. But works of art and forms of representation like THIS that resonate so deeply within me truly remind me of the fact that Im painted all sorts of colors inside, AND I FEEL IT, AM A PART OF IT, AND HAVE STRUGGLED with the prejudice of others so much that Im positive in my heart of hearts I belong to a community such as this. I could only hope to EVER be able to string words together in such a way that leaves others feeling EXHILARATED, just as you do. WOW you're incredible! Thank you so much for this!!
@enderwiggins82488 жыл бұрын
That was incredible, it resonated with me in a way poetry rarely does
@LaxLune8 жыл бұрын
I've been trying for about 5 videos now to try and come up with a comment that encompasses all the feelings I have about you. Grace, your content, the effort you put into your beautiful videos and every time I try and write something it seems to come up short. So this is me just trying to say how appreciative I am of you and everything you do. Thank you.
@rachelcasteel0922108 жыл бұрын
I wish I could like this a thousand times!
@Souleater7877 жыл бұрын
I was inches away from hating this, because the title mislead me to the content, but I thought I'd watch it out of spite. Probably the best thing I've done out of spite so far. I am completely blown away by the content. Thank you for making this. It's something that needs to be said, and now it's in cool poetry form. Again, thank you.
@Dee-jp7ek8 жыл бұрын
Thank you for writing this n_n I waited until highschool to come out as (possibly) a gay male (I hadn't dated a guy yet so I although I was pretty sure I didn't want to jump to assumptions) because there was this 'fad' going around my middle school where they were all 'bi' and they'd just hold hands but never really date. I didn't feel comfortable coming out in fear that my sexuallity wouldn't be taken seriously, seeing it as 'me trying to be cool'. Pretending to be LGBTQ is not ok. Not for veiws, not to be trendy. Ever.
@catarinabakker84058 жыл бұрын
1:35 Oh how I love poetry..
@catarinabakker84058 жыл бұрын
and also 1:59 goddamn
@stellajobe5656 жыл бұрын
Catarina Bakker I'm a year late but also 2:16
@Luchabul8 жыл бұрын
Hey Ashley, I tried posting this in the replies of your comment, but I want to see if this will post in full I have struggled for with my sexuality while being raised in a staunchly pro-conservative house. Out of fear for repulsion for what I feel, for sake of ideals in which I no longer hold any zeal. Spending years of my life trying to hide what is real. Five years of my life trying to conform to their ideals. Finally being able to be out on my own, yet still only half an hour from home. In college I can better represent the feeling of which I no longer wish to object and reject. I just want some respect. Knowing I'm not straight for years of my life, a year and a half ago sitting down to face head on the emotions I feel, being told they're reactions, that they are not real. Accepting that viewpoint because in real life, I didn't quite feel a desire for a husband or wife. Aromantic, a word that very well describes me. I was frantic trying to be who they wanted me to be. Saying I'm asexual to hide from the shame. At the time that held some validity. But I no longer want to search out for pity. Whether Ace or Gay I'm still LGBT+, so why not bury my feelings inside with out confronting, I must. Asexual is a word I used to identify with, to keep from sinking down with a ship. Even now, accepting that identity leaves me feeling lost, afraid of the eventual cost. I don't want to be without a home to go to during the breaks, just for things about me that they see as mistakes. Panic attacks writhing me with every word I type and years of fear every day and night. "Gay-ce" by myself. Any response would be appreciated. You are quite an amazing human and I am quite fond of your videos. DFTBA
@lilthrall8 жыл бұрын
you do many amazing things, but what enthralled me years ago to subscribe was your poetry. you weave words together and perform them in a way that no other person can imitate. thank you for sharing it :)
@northcub8 жыл бұрын
I said this on your vlog channel and I'll say it here too. I don't care if it's a joke, but when people just use it as clickbait, it pisses me off. So much.
@northcub8 жыл бұрын
And I forgot to write this just like I did on the vlog channel: if people do it to mock people (coughonisioncough) then they can just get off the fucking internet.
@pandaar51498 жыл бұрын
JMG787 what did onision do?
@northcub8 жыл бұрын
Panda Ar Make a fake coming out video mocking Shane Dawson and other people for coming out.
@Zoeeps7 жыл бұрын
Wow, all your poems are so amazing and powerful, really making people think (which is what they should do). I hope you have a wonderful life, inspiring others and motivating them to speak up!
@cadenjoan54568 жыл бұрын
Wow... Ash, I have never been so proud to be a fan of yours. This video was incredible, putting all the thoughts I've harbored silently for years... Into words. Thank you so much.
@iamtpphanbvbandemotrinityt728 жыл бұрын
I've only been a fan for a month, but I must say, I am blown away by this poem. The mockery of coming out scares me too much to actually come out to anyone but someone who I know will be okay with me. How little coming out is taken seriously makes me mad. Do you know how long I've wanted to tell my transphobic and (somewhat) homophobic Christian mother that I'm bi? Do you understand the pain I've been and the anxiety I've had while keeping this secret? No, you don't. So shut the fuck up about coming out.
@octoberrose2432 жыл бұрын
This took my breath away in the best way possible.
@danandphiledits63298 жыл бұрын
you're so pretty omg (sorry if you'd prefer other compliments, I'm not sure of your gender)
@jamparker9698 жыл бұрын
DanandPhil Edits she, her, they, them are all fine by Ash
@danandphiledits63298 жыл бұрын
Jam Parker okay, thank you, I appreciate it :)
@jamparker9698 жыл бұрын
Yea no problem. She gets that question a lot
@plantmom89128 жыл бұрын
PHANDOM!! heyyyy
@rooqbranwen83058 жыл бұрын
If in doubt, tell her she is smart or witty, that should fit about every gender. ;)
@esmeevanthof998 жыл бұрын
Your poems always touch me, I love it when you repeat parts of words in other words. The part where you said: "maybe losing everything" made shivers run through my spine. You also make a good point, I really hate it when it's just clickbait or even worse, people pranking their friends with saying that they're gay and providing a pile of homophobia after 'coming out'. Such as: "Haha no I'm not f*cking gay, I'm normal" and more of those remarks. I hope you'll be making more poems, Ash!
@brandonjoaquin1948 жыл бұрын
Yes read them to the ground girl
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
**twirls**
@hazelbell10216 жыл бұрын
This made me cry. Very well said and expressed. Thank you for sharing. ♥
@kurtbonisteel60988 жыл бұрын
Do other youtubers do this? I'm not surprised, I just haven't seen it happening before.
@LittleMissSparklexxo8 жыл бұрын
I've seen a couple people pretend irl once ut not on the internet, same as you lol I would love some examples if anyone knows of internet people doing this.
@amyg.75958 жыл бұрын
Simply Nailogical coined the term "holosexual," and has been using it to make merch and stuff, and all her fans call themselves holosexuals... A lot of times in her videos she says things like "this is how you know you're holosexual!"
@LittleMissSparklexxo8 жыл бұрын
amy g. Thats the worst omg there are so many things wrong with that
@dannystevenson90058 жыл бұрын
Onision, a cis guy, made a fake coming out video saying he was a trans guy. Also Jacksfilms came out as straight
@charlisabeth8 жыл бұрын
I watch Simply Nailogical sometimes and I don't really understand why the term is bad. Could you explain it please?
@sophiepotter18516 жыл бұрын
Your videos give me courage. Maybe someday all of the panic attacks will be worthwhile. Thanks for posting and being yourself.
@jeonjungkook64785 жыл бұрын
I'm a demi-girl Girl name : Jessica Male: Jackson 🙃 I've not come out as demi yet but I have came out of pan
@torimfhughes7 жыл бұрын
This made me cry because all the emotions I feel were finally put into words by someone. thank you.
@randomripoff1238 жыл бұрын
at this point, ash, it might be worth it just to put the following as a ~disclaimer~ at the start of the video: "THIS POEM IS NOT ABOUT CLOSETED OR QUESTIONING PEOPLE. THIS POEM IS ABOUT PEOPLE WHO ARE DEFINITIVELY CIS AND STRAIGHT, BY THEIR OWN CLAIMS AND IDENTITY, WHO WILLINGLY TAKE OUR LANGUAGE AND IDENTITIES AND EXPLOIT THEM FOR CLICKS AND MONETARY GAIN. THIS IS NOT AIMED AT CLOSETED OR QUESTIONING PEOPLE." then maybe people will stop willfully or accidentally completely misinterpreting your entire point and poem. (obviously you don't actually have to, this is more of a frustrated/facetious [on your behalf, and on my own] suggestion than anything)
@allesundmehr8 жыл бұрын
I agree with the message. I don't agree with that title, it's not the message you want to send
@saffodils8 жыл бұрын
I mean, there is something to be said for the idea that you don't have to come out, and don't have to continuously come out, if it will end up being harmful emotionally or physically. People tend to focus on coming out as the be-all, end-all of "living your truth" and "loving yourself" while glossing over the real effects it can have on people's lives to the point where it sometimes is better to stay closeted.
@pillbugmilk6 жыл бұрын
Aninja yeah it's misleading
@abriannasartistry87996 жыл бұрын
Dear straight people... stop coming out
@jampoots53678 жыл бұрын
This is all the reasons I avoided social media on coming out day. I couldn't stand seeing people out of the community "coming out" like it's some fun, trendy, new holiday to participate in. While others struggle to even reveal half of their truths, some like to just create silly white lies. Just... please don't. This isn't a joke.
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
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@zeinebchaabouni19418 жыл бұрын
Much love and support for what you're doing from tunisia ! Very powerful meaning to every word you said !
@girlfriends8 жыл бұрын
brilliant
@myrandarose51518 жыл бұрын
That was amazing and beautiful, Ash! I really enjoyed listening to your poem.
@sashagurieva31148 жыл бұрын
I just wanted to say your poem is beautiful, you are a role model for me, you helped me discover myself! You are the best and please continue to do what you do! 🤗🤗🤗 PS: These glasses are beautiful on you😍
@im_a_woolf25068 жыл бұрын
ugh I can't explain how amazing your videos are. You're so professional in everything you do. thank you
@siobhan_73868 жыл бұрын
Watched you practice this on you now - I'm very proud of the end result !!! Well done!
@heyitsdani138 жыл бұрын
You are so bloody talented Ashley. I'm glad you put this out there because it made me feel so many things. Thank you!!!
@sylphofvoid13818 жыл бұрын
Im Gay and got Oct 11th birthday this is my luck and fate
@iarealmerfreak018 жыл бұрын
I haven't watched your videos in forever. I forgot how much you moved me. Thank you for this.
@justicemos99438 жыл бұрын
This is beautiful! I couldn't help be play it over and over again, understanding each moment and loving you even more. Thank you for reclaiming October 11th, because that is our one day.
@MimsieSky8 жыл бұрын
Ashley...Thank you for putting this out there. As a straight person, I roll my eyes at things like this, but never really thought about how it would affect me if I were gay. You speak so eloquently and clearly that there's no question how you feel. I love your poems. They offer so much.
@firingflares75568 жыл бұрын
yeah i totally agree, it annoys me when completly straight youtubers pretend to kiss just for views, yeah some people like it- some people don't but it's just so annoying, it also annoys me that some times people aren't taken seriously when they do come out, people just don't believe them. What have our community that we call youtube become. But anways, i love your glasses
@Lizard148 жыл бұрын
Just wanna say that I LOVE your poems. I'd love to see more of them here~
@marrinf3328 жыл бұрын
ever thought of going to poetry slams? your poems would definitely do well there
@xmusixmadeaddiktx8 жыл бұрын
This is absolutely fantastic Ashley! Love love love it!
@DemianDs7 жыл бұрын
i loved your video...
@NachtCaraticus8 жыл бұрын
Your poetry always makes me feel like I need to yell and cry, but for all the good reasons instead of the bad ones. Also, those glasses look SO cute on you, you always look so good !! You're in inspiration, Ash!
@Danny-he1vc8 жыл бұрын
I love your poem video's, they're always so great and thought out. Also thank you for calling queerbaiting out. I've never really seen it happen on yt (mostly because I dont subscribe to people who would do that), but I've seen queerbaiting in tv shows/books (which happens in a different way than yt queerbaiting but still), and it is infuriating.Thank you for the poems ^_^
@ninasinkovic49355 жыл бұрын
This is one of many parts of how talented a person can be, love your work 🎈
@TheConfuzzledCat8 жыл бұрын
This is beautiful. I don't think it's angry- I think it's sensical. I am going to listen to this over and over again. Thank you so much. (Also, I love your glasses. And your haircut. I wish I could do it like that.)
@depressedvampire97348 жыл бұрын
I love you so much Ashley and thank you for making this video, I hate every year when I see people on social media post things about "coming out as straight" since I am so locked in the closet at the moment it'll be a couple of years before I can even think of coming out while thinking about my safety. Thank you so much, this means the world to me and a lot of other people to see our favourite KZbinr talk about this
@oatesnmilk6 жыл бұрын
I told my friend I was pan and he said “what’s that” and when I tried to explain it he said “that’s just bi right” and I explained more and he said “well just look at what’s in your pants”
@ayajune20886 жыл бұрын
Mildly upset chicken FUCK HIM.
@ayajune20886 жыл бұрын
I'm supporting you! (P. S. Love your name!XD)
@Astra.68896 жыл бұрын
Mildly upset chicken thats horrible. Forget what he said just be you!
@annileta65416 жыл бұрын
Coming out isn’t easy and they treat it like a little joke or video idea.
@AllenTax8 жыл бұрын
Very cool. Sitting on a comfy stool. Making all the others like a fool. Your just cool.
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
I am actually on the floor. Sorry if you think that's a bore.
@AllenTax8 жыл бұрын
No not at all. Didn't know you were. Just assumed chair or of some sort.
@mattylasusa24687 жыл бұрын
This is beauty. This shows how we don't ask for the insults and hatred and judgment, we didn't choose to be like this. We've been like this since BIRTH, and people should just ACCEPT us. So, all I want to say, is Thank You, for being you.
@jdawgrrrrrr8 жыл бұрын
I'm so in love with this
@TobiasBalk8 жыл бұрын
talk about "silencing others"
@KnightofGascogne8 жыл бұрын
more like "calling out a$$holes" ^^
@HeyThere0058 жыл бұрын
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@thefairydream8 жыл бұрын
maybe a little bit off topic but on your thumbnail you looks so different. it's incredible how much your appearance changed over the course of one year and It really suits you and somehow you do seem a lot more confident and like your mind is at easier (not at complete ease since there are so many issues the LGBT+ community has to face and therefore you also have to face). but seeing how something small within you changed for the better, for the more being truly you is really nice :)
@xariert6866 жыл бұрын
I completely agree with this video. Also... MAKE MORE POETRY. It is amazing.