How to unf**k your life (my ultimate guide)

[@daegan_ftw]

For me, the most important lesson about getting out of ruts is realizing that there will always be another rut ahead but if you give yourself enough momentum you'll roll through each one faster than the last. Some ruts will be bigger and may require a restart, some will be smaller and are at most a divot.

[@agata1014]

Thanks! Really needed that now

[@mnmlst1]

Oh my. This is so true, yet I forget about it often. Thank you for your comment for reminding me of that!

[@monsaemon]

I'll say this to myself as like a self-motivator, objects at rest tend to stay at rest while objects in motion tend to stay in motion. (But then there's the whole second part about unless it is acted upon by an unbalanced force, but we can just ignore that. it's fine. everything's fine.) So, momentum for me is huge.

[@Punkrock.Chrysalis]

Mother of all analogies! Like when you’re on roller skates if you’re going super slow the smallest crack will tank you but if your zooming you’ll barely even feel a dip down!

[@funku2527]

Well said. Only experience talks like that.

[@gillianspencer9167]

For those who struggle with seeing all the stuff you have to do/ organizing between mosquito, emergencies, etc: Something I've found that helps short term with the rut and feeling productive/better is to put all the tasks I have to do in a bag and to draw tasks as I go. (I usually include some fun things I want to do in there as well because having fun/relaxing is also important!). Drawing tasks randomly helps take executive decision making away, helps me focus on one task at a time, and watching the bag become more empty helps make me feel like I'm doing something that's actually worth it! I also add the reward of ripping up the slip with the task on it once I'm done said task.

[@flor651]

Thanks! I'm gonna try this. Usually I get overwhelmed when I have a lot of tasks to do and can't decide where to start. I keep jumping from one task to another without finishing anything, so this seems helpful

[@KherryLine]

Thanks! I'm gonna try this out

[@cacciatore_5320]

did you just find a way to hack my brain ?? i love you man

[@sarahroberts7374]

Ohh I am so gonna try this!!!!! I give birth soon and have recently moved house and I'm finding it really hard to work out which out of all the shitty admin I have to do is most important so I end up looking at my list and thinking NOT NOW if I do this it'll hopefully kick start me!

[@spyrodragonsbane3076]

I love this idea. Thank you for sharing, will reply back in a week with my results!

[@kimbechong]

A strategy I’ve been using lately when I don’t feel in tuned with my mind, body, and self, is to view myself as an outsider caretaker. So instead of thinking “I don’t want to work on this task”, I reframe it as “working on this task will help [me] and future self.” I know it’s weird but it helps me push forward when I dissociate.

[@Liliarthan]

Yes, the ol compassion for future self thing helps sometimes. So does going “dammit, past me! Why did I forget to do x!?” as a way to offload shame onto past self 😆😆

[@catalinagalan]

Yep, I get that, doing it for future Cat is a good way to get motivated, it works wonders for going to the gym or avoiding unhealthy habits (moat of the time 😅)

[@shrubbie69]

yesss what helps me with this is to change the normal narrator voice in your head! like you could make it of someone you really care about, or someone you respect. heck it could be this guy. idk its comforting and hearing myself narrate every thought gets boring

[@lynnespinoza4736]

​@lilmissjoodypoody sometimes when I think about not doing something in the moment I imagine hearing future me shaking their fist in the distance going "why past me?! whyyy?!" 😂

[@zacharbison8763]

Thanks for the advice it couldn't come at a better time. I finally got sober and things were going good rebuilding my life and I got really manic and couldn't sleep or slow down for 5 days straight (not even a nap) then hit with the worst flu of my life where I blacked out every time I tried to get up and I ran out of heating fuel. It was literally 26f in my house for 2 days before I got more all the while work calling telling me I'm getting fired if I don't show up. It felt like I was being drowned in wave after wave of awful. During the cold days I knew I was going to die alone because of my complete inability to handle the simplest of situation. But I doggedly keep going, got fuel, the feeling in my feet came back, I slept. And realizing that I was doing my best in a terrible situation makes me feel proud to have gotten through rather than ashamed for fucking my life yet again. The only thing I didn't do that I should have was call someone for help, don't know why I didn't but just felt impossible. My advice is to call for help when you need. People love to help, but they can't help if they don't know what's going on. Anywho, thanks for another video!

[@shaynannigans]

Today I finally glued together my first art sculpture, something I’ve been avoiding for like a year. I even ordered the glue months ago after watching a different Struthless video. So it’s nice to be rewarded with this video today to remind myself I have taken one step towards unfucking my life 🎉

[@MandaPanda254]

🙌 congrats! 🌻

[@nebula1oftheseven488]

Hi , make a video about the sculpture I would watch it ❤

[@brettobaxter2286]

Good on you! I too want to see the sculpture.

[@natashatrump7875]

This is inspiring! Creating is everything. Way to get over that block and on with the next thing.

[@shaynannigans]

Thanks everyone! No video for now and I’m not sure how I can send a photo to anyone who is interested. My next goal is to finish 12 more sculptures by the end of March. 🎉

[@Hi_Im_Akward]

My advice for anyone in a hole in life is to figure out the most basic shit that makes your life hard. I know he said that in his video, but I honestly don't even think about the small 15 minute tasks to gain momentum. Usually I'm so overwhelmed and behind at that point that I need to get the most essential stuff done so i can feel like I can breathe. For me, that is to get the kitchen cleaned and the laundry done. The next thing that follows is making sure I have groceries. Those things not being done will make me not functional. Eating is extremely important for functioning, and being able to eat healthy and not eat out means that I feel better and spend less money. Laundry is extremely important because if it's not done then I basically can't go anywhere inorder to get the things done, I feel incredibly self conscious and shitty if I go out with dirty clothes on. I prioritize clothes over towls and bedding, but clean towls means I'm more likely to take care of myself and shower, and clean bedding means I'm going to sleep better which means I will function better. I can still find myself in a rut even if I accomplish those things, but I will get out of a depression spiral faster and I can also focus on more pressing without it completely fucking me over. I.e. if I have the real basic stuff done and I barely have time to do other responsibilities, I can rebound faster when I do have time because I didn't get so behind the previous days, weeks or months this can happen.

[@jbrock8129]

What’s helped me a lot is self-compassion. This started out as compassion for how I was feeling, but it’s evolved over time to being more nurturing toward myself (rather than beating myself up all the time and feeling defeated). When I look at the things I need to do as a kindness I’m doing for myself, it doesn’t feel as hard. Life feels a bit sweeter and less burdensome. Also dividing up jobs into smaller steps can help with feeling overwhelmed. Like I usually divide rooms into imaginary zones to clean them. It makes it go faster and I feel more successful when I get through a small goal. (Or I’ll clean up one thing in the room each day, like clear the coffee table, pick up the stuff in the chair, or pick up the things on the floor in the family room. One small job each day is WAY less overwhelming than cleaning a whole room.) But it works for things like laundry too. (Gather the clothes. Take the clothes downstairs. Put clothes in washer and turn on. Take clothes out and put in dryer. Take out of dryer. Take upstairs. Fold/hang.) I don’t HAVE to do it all at once. I can do it on my own time. Little successes add up. And music helps a lot too. 🎵 If I listen to music I like, it helps me get through jobs I feel resistant toward. ❤

[@hotguava]

It don’t really matter where the quote came from but specifically the part “hope is not a strategy” is really powerful. It’s natural to hope and maybe hoping is just part of the preceding process but, at the end of the day its the night. And hope is not a strategy.

[@inkaliciousable]

Yah, this was a good episode, dude. My daughter died 4 years ago on the 17th. Plus COVID and all the other BS - it's been rough. Got rid of a useless man last month, I want to unf@#$ life, but health problems interfering. I'm sitting in a disaster zone for a house when I used to be totally OCD. I feel like I am ready to make changes, but this health stuff is not helping. So, I will watch this again tomorrow morning and take notes and try to at least do the mosquitoes. Thanks for sharing your struggles, it makes it easier to not feel like a POS. Hopefully, you understand what I mean lol.

[@CailieStar]

I hope you will find perhaps some help with the house, to make it feel like your house again because for me disaster zone of a house happens during the toughest times in my life and ends up being a bottleneck for so many other things. When clothes can be found everywhere except in the closet, when the recycling is all ovet the house but not organised, when all the dishes are on the counter but no strength to empty or fill the dishwasher. Somehow everything I own seems to have climbed out of their place and filled every surface in the house. My motivator recently was a friend coming for a visit and I did the bare minimum of a hoover and tidy but afterwards I realised how much more easily my thoughts could flow with less visual clutter around. Health issues can be a huge barrier for starting but perhaps it is possible to ask or hire help ❤ sending lots of strength!

[@clarewillison9379]

❤❤❤

[@dio8636]

Good morning, I wish you the best of luck

[@emilytetreault2516]

Good luck fam. I also have had my ass kicked by chronic pain and illness. Flare ups knock me out, everything comes to a grinding halt, and all my responsibilities turn into a 45 car pileup behind me that I have to clear with only elbow grease. It's rough. Solidarity. Let's do it together.

[@wkt2506]

Being in grief is a big deal and un-fucking things in that context is a whole other level. I hope your plans include time and activities to grieve and just be a human, or celebrate/mark your daughter's life 🦌

[@carollennon3522]

When completely overwhelmed even the smallest thing feels impossible but Ive come to realise that this feeling usually stems from one task that has completely stalled me (like the camera for Cameron) once there is something lurking in the back of your mind making you feel worried, guilty, lazy it seems to have a snowball effect on everything else. Sometimes, definitely not always, if I can recognise whats going on and make myself do the thing it suddenly releases all the stress and anxiety that not doing it has created.

[@33goodwitch]

Thank you 💙

[@NorthernLightsLeather-Design]

Thank you! This is it! I've got something burning a hole in the back of my head and I bet it's a mosquito to slap. Thank you!

[@33goodwitch]

This popped back up at the perfect time, thank you again 💜

[@carollennon3522]

@@33goodwitch I'm so glad it's helped 💓

[@TheSpiralLab]

I think a lot of what gets in our way, what causes us to get in a self-perpetuating toxic loop, is SHAME. A few things that help me disrupt shame are 1) paying attention to how it feels in my body and recognizing it sooner in the toxic loop cycle, and 2) speaking about it to someone I really trust.

[@diondredunigan5282]

Do you have any tips on starting those conversations with the people you trust? 🤔 I find it awkward to initiate sometimes 😅

[@mearaclaigh1681]

I had no idea you were giving yourself a 26 documentary challenge! Even if you can't meet your deadlines, remember that they're self- imposed and viewers like myself have absolutely loved the content you put out so far, even if i have to wait to see it. Don't give up!

[@freakespionage]

I dropped everything to watch this video and I don't regret it, this is EXACTLY what I need right now. Plus the fact that Cam hasn't pulled off the AS perfectly makes me feel better about being behind and probably is the main reason I haven't given up (like I have for other challenges in the past). I actually feel more fired up than ever about it (also going back to read my week 1 and 2 stuff has helped). Thank you!!

[@captainkacke1651]

Same here!

[@zellafae]

Same October has been set back after set back. And i have fallen several weeks behind on the challenge but knowing that struthless has also fallen behind and is still going makes me realise that i can keep going on as well despite being behind. ❤

[@maddalenasegato]

Sometimes we freeze when we fall behind on whatever we have to make or do because it feels like the world will know we've missed the deadline and anything we do now is just us trying to cover up a failure, but the key here is that what one does is never about the world's expectations, it's about the kind of person that pushing through and completing our goals despite our setbacks will turn us into. The product is not what we make, it's what the 'making' makes of us.

[@agata1014]

After reading some comments I realized I've never done a to-do list for this year, because I knew it won't happen. And here I am, having a new job, a raise (first time ever!), stopped avoiding doctors and dentists, take care of myself and my dogs, even doing pretty well with family. So what helps me get better is: - to do list. I'm a person who lives with a lists, no list - no action; - planning. Always starts with my calendar and things I need to do today. Then I slowly plan other actions and things; - starting simple. There are some small things that annoys me and makes me feel so awful, like laundry or dirty dishes. If I can get this done, then I can get to work; - breaks! Never forget about small break for movement (and dogs if you have them). I always have some piece of paper to write anything I forgot before and to schedule them after work, so I don't panic in the middle of working.

[@flugm0dus]

Never stop making this content please

[@TeriHargraveartist]

With you there...:)

[@kate_lizzerd]

Timing couldn't be better! Im here trying to unfuck my life, moved to a new city, dropped the university and relationships, floating like a miserable bubble... I planned to do some brain dump and planning this weekend and here come YOU with a precise instruction! Thank you struthless, you are the most chill and friendly motivational blogger I've ever seen, it is very nice to get such information not from some dude in business suit, but from a person who clearly feels the way we all do.

[@londongael414]

I love the way you break it down into specific, doable steps. One thing I find helpful is to remind myself of other times I have got out of a rut, or done things that I didn't want to do, but that needed to be done etc. Turns out, for me, feeling "overwhelmed" is more a *fear* of being overwhelmed. So remembering scary things that actually didn't overwhelm me, because I dealt with them, helps. Good luck to everyone in this situation!

[@Nightshade463__]

Goddamn dude as a self proclaimed day one-er. I cannot thank you enough for everything you have done for our silly little community we call humanity. Love from Sydney bro hope all is well ❤

[@oliviahns]

My step 1 for unf**king my life: watch a Struthless video (I know, it’s not good to rely on motivational videos to get things done, but your videos have saved me from the depths of self-loathing so many times. Thank you Campbell!)

[@BelIa42]

I really like the name of your tags. Dealing with mosquitos, emergencies and bottlenecks seems a) more manageable than a lot of other approaches b) a lot less disgusting than thinking about eating frogs... I understand the principle behind the eating the frog first thing in the morning... but that image... it really does not help. Also, I am amazed again how easy it is to forget things/insights/... I knew. That's where your image of unburying myself from the shit and putting it to good use in form of a thriving garden comes in... There could actually be some sense, some meaning to the current struggles. It might not all be in vain... While this is so trivial, it does feel liberating and I feel more energy and drive than in the last half a year. Thank you for sharing your experiences. They help me a lot.

[@junshum2412]

Thanks for sharing your 'cringe' pep talk! Wasn't cringe at all to me and very motivating! How you face your embarassment and just shoot it out there for your viewers hoping it helps is inspiring. Also, to share what helps me the most when it feels like everything is fucked is to take a step back. Slow, deep breaths for a couple of small moments to relax and cut off the overwhelming stress. From there is when I can take control again.

[@highsol222]

So I've never actually watched any "how to un F- your life" video, but this one was the best ever. And I'm not just saying that. I had a few aha! moments and even came up with insights of my own while watching this. Ultimately what helps me most is, don't think just do. Because thinking about doing the hard thing is far more difficult than actually doing the hard thing. My problem solving skills only really turn on when I'm drowning in work. If its easy then all I'm doing is ruminating instead of strategizing. Also priming aka "micro pep-talks" have always worked for me too. Like "if you don't take this cold shower right now you suck, and if you do you're a super saiyan!"

[@krissywhiskiart]

I’ve been slowly crawling out of a rut since mid August due of lack of sleep, literally frying my physical and mental health. Sleep is SOOO important. Working out can and will actually improve your mental health. The perspective of momentum, goals and plans and reframing really helps. Also highly recommend celebrating small wins or goals you set for yourself, it’s easy to forget sometimes, especially when we work for ourselves. 🎉

[@solocasting22]

I have been in a rut for a couple of years and just recently started pushing out of it. Being honest with ones self and just saying if I don't do it! It's not gonna get done has helped kick my ass back into gear! Look forward to your next VDO! PEACE!!!

[@Brads-strung-out]

The weight of misery on one's shoulders is so much that it requires a huge amount of energy to hold it and we virtually can't move in life because of it. Can that energy shift? is it getting tiring? Do I expect someone else to lift some of it? am I the only person around to lessen the weight? Can I become stronger to manage the weight? It must start within.

[@captainkacke1651]

The fact that life has gotten into your way during the AS is just the exact thing I, and probably many joining you in this challenge, needed. The overachievers don't, I follow some that are already done with letter "i", who don't even honour the rest weeks. It's making me feel worse instead of motivated. In my case, life also just got into the way and I'm struggling to keep going. But seeing you being now done with the same letter I am at is just way more motivating to go and pick up the next letter. Even if it might feel like failure to you, for all the chaotic peeps doing your challenge, it's exactly the best thing. It makes us not feel left behind. So good on you! :D

[@victoriasbtt8235]

At the end of the day if you think the challenge is for you and meant for you to be kept in motion, ending it would be opposite to that. So do it at your own pace, but just don't quit. I'd say do it in a way you're proud of what you're producing. And if you do want to leave it, still be happy with having done a chunk of it.

[@JoanOfArgghh]

Years ago an old preacher friend described a rut as, "a grave with the ends kicked out." He talked about a car driving in a rut, and what it takes to get out of that rut: "You gotta make a surprisingly violent motion on the steering wheel." I think I like your approach better. I have done the strong-arm motion of pulling everything off-center, but it's a bumpy ride that way. Better to swat mosquitoes first.

[@MrChristoferoful]

Great analogy. Thank you.

[@dave0754]

I always start by cleaning my environment. Just picking up the junk lying around, washing dishes. No need for a plan, just keep going and do whatever quick cleaning is accessible.

[@mogwilde9069]

For real as far as attending to the physical environment goes sometimes standing up is the first step, just that activation. Once you've moved you see the things that are out of place and you can start pottering and fixing.

[@meganjohnson9540]

That may be the best pro talk I have ever heard. Thank you so much for sharing that. You’re an inspiration. Respect.

[@ZonymaUnltd.]

A comment won’t do justice to how much I appreciate your content and your authenticity. It’s weird to feel like I can relate so heavily to somebody through a screen across the world. Your videos seriously challenge me to be *real* with _myself_ … thank you and cheers to growth and change!

[@localevilpotato5954]

I am so grateful for your videos, you always explain things so well and you’re so kind and realistic. One thing that helps me is to treat yourself like a person. I notice a lot of people don’t view themselves as someone who deserves love and kindness or even patience. You wouldn’t tell a stranger to “get over it” or “you should be better by now” so why would you tell yourself that? A little thing but it helps me. Love your videos! ❤️

[@katrinajordan6708]

Hi, 10 yrs ago I went through a traumatic event that ruined the person I was- mentally, emotionally & physically. For the last 9 years I've been telling myself to "get over it" & that I "should be better by now." I'm not great with self-compassion lol. Reading in print those exact phrases & how you wouldn't say it to a stranger has just changed my perception, so much more than 10 years of therapy has! Thank you. One person's words can change another's life xx

[@localevilpotato5954]

@@katrinajordan6708 It’s hard to be kind to yourself, we aren’t ever taught it. But baby steps towards self love are huge accomplishments ❤️ You deserve patience, understanding, love, and compassion just as much as you would give it to someone else. I’m happy my words helped you. I hope you see, you are worth so much more then that little voice in your head says you are. ❤️

[@Flatteryfox]

My mom recently died… and she was my number 1 fan in life. Everything has been crumbling all around me ever since and I can’t get out of it. I feel indescribably fucked and everything is harder now …. I know that I need to move forward and pull myself out of it, but it feels hopeless.

[@zkay1546]

I know this was a few months ago, but I just wanted to say I hope you come back and watch this video again if you need to. I know things are probably really hard right now, but I believe in you, internet stranger. You've got this. Sending warm vibes

[@noevulpes6802]

I hope your life is much better now. ❤ So sorry about your mom

[@Flatteryfox]

@@noevulpes6802 it’s better than it was nine months ago. Thank you. 💕

[@janetbetz2790]

Cam, you speak to my soul dude. Like, you could seriously be making your content specifically and directly for me. Its astonishing. Thank you for helping me! You are a a person I truly respect and I value what you say.

[@crystaleaston3008]

I'm in the depths of personal study, in the hopes of finally being able to make art a career. One thing I often despair about is not getting there fast enough, which impacts my mental health, making it harder to do the work. I find Struthless' story so inspiring, (not only this video) and it reminds me that every single step I take toward that goal, no matter how slowly, is still progress.

[@victoriasbtt8235]

I would add that in your case time matters less than in other careers. How so? For an artist anything can fuel inspiration right? So by doing things at your pace, the right pace, you allow yourself to fully take in what you're doing and connecting more with the what and how than with the when. Basically by taking longer you are gathering more experience (like general life experience) and therefore your art will be fuller, stronger, more real, more intense, more intentional, basically better than it would be if you breezed through life. Just think, every "extra" time this take (who decided how much time it should take anyway) its getting more seasoned and richer 😏

[@YOHOMEGIRL]

what you said at 14:22 brought tears to my eyes, I needed to hear that. Thank you 💕

[@andriytaranishyn1361]

This October has not been kind to me. I was overwhelmed with studies, work, and I also had to move because of a crazy landlady evicting me for the stuff I hadn’t done. Also, I’m Ukrainian, and on my birthday I found out that one guy I knew from school was KIA. Yesterday I teared up when my friends invited me for lunch because I finally have time for that - have time for myself and to meet up with friends. So now, after successfully moving, I found myself with fucked up eating habits and sleep schedule, around 4 kilos heavier than a month ago, boxes of stuff in the new room, having no clue what to do and where to start. But the thought that helped me a lot when I put down my thoughts on the paper yesterday, is “You’re one choice away from your ideal life”. And it is true. This is about “mosquitoes”, just in different words. If you make just one right choice, really, just one, let’s say cook a salad instead of ordering a burger, you’ll feel better physically, you’ll respect yourself more, and this will boost your confidence. Isn’ t that what you want? A healthier body, a more disciplined mind, more responsible and capable you. And all it took was ONE small choice. You’ll then notice that it’s easier to make another right decision, and harder to make the wrong one. Before you know it, your life’s unfucked!

[@darco1991]

For me... This came yesterday. Accepting that not every day is going to be productive is so important. And sometimes you have to go through one or two unproductive days to have a really good day

[@JaRyCu]

Having a Struthless video appear on a Friday night in my time zone was amazing. I don't even have to mention that it's helpful (which it was) or high quality (because duh, it's Struthless). You're amazing dude and thank you for sharing your time with us.

[@1marya.]

Mosquitoes, emergencies, bottlenecks. Like the Eisenhower Matrix, but actually helpful and doesn't result in you spending all your time putting out fires. I am definitely going to try this. Thanks!

[@docmnc8010]

I find the most helpful step for has always been awareness of my own worst habits. I know I tend to go from no awareness of stress to overstressed and completely shutdown. So cataloguing my own behaviours to give myself an external indicator on how i'm doing is, i've found, the number 1 thing that helps me put everything else into action to keep things unfucked.

[@medorakea7327]

during my worst rut (approximately ten years of actively being depressed & suicidal & dealing with disordered eating & mild psychosis), my main tactic was to be so lazy that killing myself sounded like too much work. as long as i could stay alive until the end of the day, go to bed, and wake up the next day and do it all over again, i kind of just assumed that i’d figure it out eventually. and i did.

[@highsol222]

As a topic that gains traction easily, I hope YOUR video becomes extremely viral and takes off like crazy.

[@moonlight28_]

I'm a brazilian who lives in Japan and I just woke up and I'm still sleepy so I'm saving this gold to watch later ❤ you always rock with your content. thanks for this chanel

[@jarrbones]

I'm excited, I'm scared, I'm optimistic, I'm fucked. This sums up my life at this given point. Thank you for the video and thanks to everyone for their comments. I needed this ❤

[@DIRTYLILT0ASTER]

Honestly a good self help book title

[@eden3141]

i absolutely needed this today. the timing was impeccable and MAN, every word you said hit what i have been feeling for months now on the nail. keep being you, struthless. you've helped me and so many others out more times than i can count. :D

[@borhagan9057]

I've indulged in self help videos and books for like a decade now. I never expected the person to resonate with me the most to be the guy that drew sexy Thomas the tank 😅 this is good stuff

[@shrubbie69]

aye i really appreciate this video, and have been incorporating the tags (mosquitoes, emergencies, and bottlenecks) into my everyday life :) ive noticed it to work much better for me than the Eisenhower matrix or any other task sorting methods. thanks so much man

[@StillOnTrack]

I've mapped out my thoughts and attempted to organize and prioritize them in the past and it felt good, and I started to follow-through, but lost momentum at some point. I feel like not only is my life fucked but so is my country and the world and no matter how I unfuck my life, the rest will still weigh heavy on my soul. They say not to stress over things you can't control or change, but I can't just turn off my empathy and sorrow for the world around me. But admittedly I haven't unfucked my life yet, so I don't know, maybe it'll help. So THANK YOU for this and for all that you do. I'm taking notes on this video and intend to attempt to apply it to my own fucked life. I've tried before and not followed through, or only half-heartedly followed through, but I'll try again, and again, and again. And I really, truly, SERIOUSLY do appreciate you doing your best to help others like me.

[@lihann_]

haven't been able to find a job, stuck in a such a fucked period in my life, but this video came and reminded me it's going to get better

[@spillfish4327]

Something I really appreciate about your videos is that you’re clearly not faking it. So much self-help is just grifters saying “break projects up into smaller tasks” and running away with bags of money, but you actually show us the shit you’re digging through. Like, I’ve ALSO kept someone’s camera for a year and felt ridiculous when I finally returned it. It’s great pairing up these experiences and going “well struthless did it, so can I!”

[@SaltyBeachGirl]

I’m so glad I found your channel. I’ve been spiraling with anxiety and depression after a serious illness, and although I’m much better- I’m at a loss of how to get things turned around. Your smile is contagious- and you break things down to manageable steps! New sub- off to watch everything!! Thank you!

[@HappyNesquik]

Realising what has changed to mess with your routine is super helpful for me; holidays, something particularly triggering, moving, too much social activity, a hangover, new baby, or whatever big life event. When you realise it's not your system but this 'change or interruption' which is wrecking havoc in your system -- it really helps to take some of the guilt and self-criticism away, which in turn makes it easier to get back on track and take it a bit easier on yourself! For instance, I now know that every time I return from a trip abroad, I will have to work extra hard to get back on track and I'll have some sort of exhaustion burnout too (woop being an introvert!) -- or that if a new and big life thing is messing with my head, I need to be extra gentle and kind to myself. Put your state of mind into perspective!

[@alyciagibson]

Bless you for the transparency of your own shortcomings and sharing of such valuable tips. As someone who has struggled with chronic depression and trauma since I was a child (now 30), here are the things that have helped me tremendously with becoming a better version of myself: -When I feel like there is nothing I can control in my life due to just periods of waiting for things to get un-fucked with time (along with the obvious effort and reflections), I try to clean my surroundings. I go about by beginning small and try to work towards decluttering and/or re-organizing spaces to be more functional to who I wish to be in the newer version I'd like to be. -I actively pat myself and give myself hugs (even if it feels silly) because it gives me the comfort and reassurance that I might need to be self-compassionate to overcome whatever the rut is I'm facing. -I remember that historically I've been through times that I didn't think I'd survive through so that alone is proof I'm capable and strong enough to overcome even more.

[@Rawi888]

Man... I don't know how to say this, but I have been having an enantiodromia of mine watching you all this time. I see so much of myself in you and sometimes that hurts a bit as I'm seeing what type of growing I would have to do. You tend to tell interesting stories in the way I that really clicks with me. You give me hope to find purpose of my own. (Congrats on the growth bro I've been here since your 100k days)

[@KennyArmand]

Thanks for the rec on 4000 weeks. Read it this week. Really good.

[@linda9581]

I have one! First of all I have always struggled with anxiety/regulating my emotions and it always gives me such a hard time. BUT the other day I actually managed to feel better! So I was stuck in a bad mood and I was just sinking into it because of my anxiety. At one point I started thinking that "okay I'm sad but there is nothing wrong with being sad about (stuff that happened)" and it might sound dumb but adding that to trying to concentrate on my breath, ACTUALLY HELPED! Not feeling guilty about what I was experiencing really made it a 1000 times better. Bonus point if you are not alone while doing this (it's reassuring to have someone to help you through your emotions) Hope this helps someone❤ Also huge thanks to struthless for always helping and reuniting people!

[@AR-pk3md]

Just started watching and had to pause because the casual sponsor mentioning right after the sequence of F-bombs made me laugh so hard that it brought tears to my eyes 😂

[@under_world0848]

"Things will get worse before they get better" - yes man! totally agree (: I started therapy a few months ago and at the beginning i was unsure if its normal, that everything gets worse, but my therapist said, that she thinks that i'm actually starting to feel more consciously what was here before and therefore it feels like i do steps backward, yeah, she was right (:

[@evelynspaghetti4978]

I needed this so, so much.. I could actually cry at how greatful I am you've handed me a process on a platter. I have been floundering and my usual strats aren't working. For anyone interested in tips, I use the 30 sec rule. Take any action towards the goal and sustain for 30 seconds. Then if you can, stretch it out for two minutes, then you then get over the motivation hump. The other thing is change the feeling. Think of how I'll feel when the task is done, then take one motivating action that aligns with the feeling, for example.. putting on music or a podcast, changing my clothes (eg, exercise...put on excercise clothes or to make hard phone calls I put on make up and put my hair up to feel put together) I hope that helps someone. They're just two of my most used, but really, really needed this video today. Just scrounging for a pen so I can make the lists

[@evelynspaghetti4978]

I'm also a fan of the "yeah well you just have to woman up eve. Someone has to do it, off you trot" hard line self talk also. It's got me through alot, being very real with myself and being able to call out my own behaviours.

[@halloweendancing]

Also, I'd love to hear your lessons on relationships. I'm recovering from a difficult relationship with someone I deeply cared for but who was unable to give me what I needed. He cheated and lied. We were together 5 years. And I would love some advice on romantic relationships, how to recover from betrayal, and also upkeeping relationships in general! Your perspective is always so insightful.

[@ImJustTryingToSurvive]

I think the channel "The crappy childhood fairy" might be good for that. She talks about a wide range of things ranging from childhood problems to narcissistic relationships.

[@meshavillar]

@@ImJustTryingToSurvive I love crappy childhood fairy!

[@stillremain.artwork]

for me it was acceptance, I used to have panic attacks and anxiety problems, also not being able to connect to the real world. So through therapy and meditation (with a diazepam treatment for over a month to treat my panic attacks) I discovered that acceptance of my true self was going to be what would allow me to change what I don't like about myself and be a better version. Because if we don't accept our issues and we deny them, how are we going to be able to change them for the better? Accept who we are and start working on that, also watch all of the struthless videos because each one is a gem from the heart

[@nannywhumpers5702]

My mate of 30+ years recently passed. I wasn't sure if this video would help, but it oddly did. I watched just the first part before bed and thought about it. I'm watching the rest now, it's such good advice. Thank you for helping me find a way forward, the grief counseling just spiraled me.

[@sarapa52]

Fellow creative with Crohn's, you mentioned flaring in the start of your video. Truly this illness has taught me to reframe my productivity and how to manage a to-do list overall. Best you can do is be kind to yourself 💖 Huge fan of all your insights and each time you are sharing your journey these past few years!!

[@zana427]

This strategy is genius, I always find your videos so inspiring and motivating, thank you so much for existing and doing this work. It helped me to get out of ruts before and no doubt it will this time too. My best suggestion for getting out of a rut is doing a daily routine for at least three days, good sleep, moving and nutritious food, keeping your space clutter free and brain dump. I do that for a few days religiously and then everything seems easier. Great video, I'm a huge fan. P.s. your "cringe" insert was not that cringy, so don't beat yourself up to much💪

[@manu892009]

A thing that really helped me was knowing that I dont have to do something everyday. Everybody was telling that I should draw (in this case) everyday to improve, but taking a day or two off makes me progress further and faster when I get back. Just find a way to enjoy something as long as possible

[@KitSixx]

As another commenter said, bad moods of being unproductive and just in a fucked headspace, I come to your videos. Your life and your excitement, while telling us all this, really helps bolster the energy. And I am someone who rewatches stuff, for ease of comfort. Sometimes something said just hits differently than it did the first time watching a video. Hope you're doing well,

[@theaccidentalmonster]

Wow, this is jam packed with helpful techniques and perspective shifts! Glad I clicked on this, thank you for sharing all these. 💕 One tool I'm using right now to unfuck my life is letting go of "consistency." It's all well and fine for people that can show up every day at the same time, but after 40 years of trying I have to admit I'm just not capable of that. What I AM capable of, though, is showing up in a moment for long stretches of time here and there- so if I use that and break down what I do into bite sized pieces, I can spend 5 hours making several articles or episodes to be published over time. Then all I need to be consistent with is showing up to hit the publish button and share the links. Even then, I can schedule things for more stability on the front end while I do my chaotic thing in the background. Sometimes it's not about forcing ourselves to fit into a method, but changing the method to fit what we're already doing. 😉

[@JaneNewAuthor]

That's me. 40 years of showing up, now for some weird reason it can be hard to do anything. Those mosquitoes are dead!

[@Liliarthan]

Yep. As an almost 40yo who only got diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year, I realised (and since have been learning to accept) that all those strategies that work for other people but I can’t ever seem to become even remotely competent at, no matter how hard I try, is because it’s just not how my brain operates. I’ve been an iOS app trying to run on a Windows PC.

[@coloripple]

I'm a very positie person that's been lucky that a lot of things haven't been that hard for me. This has led me to double down on my "things wil be fine" mindset though, and since the end of my bachelors I haven't had the right motivation (or rather discippline) to actually get things done myself. I just made a plan for the last months of the year, and hopefully I'll be more unfucked soon as well. Also, amazing to see you and anthpo together!

[@rowenadelrosario4209]

I really really appreciate this video. I was in a not-so-nice mental state these past few weeks. I had made a lot of progress with myself for two months but within a span of a few days, seems like all of that progress got f**ked and I'm back to square one. This video somehow served as a trigger for me to get out of the rut that I'm in right now and continue with my life again. Get that good progress rolling again. So again, thank you!

[@alexanderklepp]

I’ve been getting into self-help videos for the last couple of years and they’ve been helping me a lot.

[@thesimplicitylifestyle]

Simplicity is the key to living a life that is joyful and free!

[@martyallen6931]

Phenomenal video ❤️ my tip that I've been trying to apply to my life is "if you know you will be mad at yourself for doing it, don't" the goal here isn't to shame yourself but more so to better hold yourself accountable by considering the weight of a decision before acting it out. It's pretty common knowledge but it works pretty well

[@matthewkrumlauf9990]

The parallel in your life to mine give me hope for myself (we are very different as well so do not worry to much about the parasocial elements) But I just started writing out my thoughts today. And it was a relief and then I see this title and the advice lines up so perfectly. I have ADHD and I am finally understanding how to learn and destress in ways that are healthy. I managed to get through college and all the expectations just continued to beat me down. I completed my masters and felt like I couldn’t do anything and I wasn’t worth anything. Even typing this out is scary, but I have taken steps to finally learn subjects that bring me joy. I am taking challenges that everyone told me were beyond me. I will not let myself get buried. One major element I find helpful is realizing that a routine can help but failing to do it once or having a cheat day is important. I need a sense of shaking things up or my brain will not relieve stress. Also if you have ADHD, it is super important to find moments to listen to nothing to rest your mind from all the constant stimulus around you. Find something calming to do for 15 minutes.

[@morebaileyskim]

This was incredible thank you. One thing that has been helping me get out of a current rut has been paying attention to when I am telling myself a story. "you won't be good at that don't try" or "what is even the point in trying to clean this mess" etc. when I catch it, and pay attention, I am realizing more and more how much thinking those thoughts has just become... a habit? and if I think about it a little more in a more kind of questioning frame of mind it makes me snap out of it a little.

[@Mandy._.Monday]

Relatable! Thanks for taking the time🖤

[@kosfury]

Thank you Cam, this video is on point. It's easy to get stuck in the shit of life. This video is a great reminder that there is a way out and it offers a practical way to do so. Love your videos. Keep em' coming!

[@kendraharris523]

I’ve related to Sisyphus since high school.. life is hard. When you think too much it can feel insurmountable… especially with children! They’re the best but also so time consuming. “Hope is not a strategy” is a mantra I live by. It has forced me to apply my professional management skills and tactics to my personal life, which has been helpful (most times). Life is work sometimes.. might as well slip on that persona for myself every once in a while 😅 If it makes you feel better Cam, I haven’t done any of the letters yet for AS. I’ve already told myself I’ll backload because life just happens sometimes, and learning to go with the flow of things is as valuable as the original goal itself. Side quests are a part of every epic. Take care of your health and fill your cup, we ain’t goin anywhere! ❤

[@FreddotheWheelchairGuy]

Congrats on 1M subs !!! Well deserved. ❤

[@RobbVance]

Getting a new perspective always helps me, whether that’s hiking a mountain to get a birdseye view, talking to a friend, or changing my physical location for a bit

[@BlackBirdFactories]

Truth be told, I just needed to hear your pep talk. Accepting that life is f**** right now, and it will get worse, but in the long run it will get better. It always did

[@Loretta_C]

Doing anything hard always boosts my confidence. I recently had the LASIK vision correction surgery and I was so scared and reluctant. After I went through with the procedure I felt so brave and accomplished. Doing the hard things that you know will benefit you in the end, is important.

[@ABrown9312]

I’ve been fired twice this year and dealing with the regret of failed opportunities has been hard. It’s my fault and I take full responsibility for things going south. I’m taking steps to fix things (webinars, upskilling courses) etc. Some days, I’m okay and moving forward, other days my thoughts attack and I feel hopeless. Cheers to unfucking our lives ladies, gents and other persons.

[@JustAGuyWithThoughts]

At about 13 mins in you spoke about acceptance. Should check out the stoic principle of "Amor Fati". Essentially, "I love this". Not just acceptance of the struggles, but embracing them. Having a tough time at the gym? Amor fati, I love this struggle. Having a bad mental health day? Amor fati, I love this pain because it lets me feel, and the good things are sweeter for this suffering. It's a powerful reframing of negatives and makes you look for the beneficial aspects which can come from it.

[@Kyattsu]

"Sucking at something is the first step towards being sorta good at something." - Jake from Adventure Time -- one of my favorite quotes and is what you reminded me about at 13:15. Also, grats on 1 million subs!!!!! Been watching for almost 3 years and am thrilled to see how much your channel has grown, and how you've grown as a person, too! Keep it up, man!

[@claudiafinelle7252]

your videos are so extremely helpful and relatable. Thank you so much for making them and sharing yourself with us

[@JeanPhilippeBoucher]

There's definitely a lot of power to the moskito-first approach! I've found that even things that are seemingly positive (like watching a movie I've been meaning to watch for a while.) can count as moskitos and give you a meaningful boost!

[@spicycaco2061]

As someone that genuinely goes through bad depressive periods the best thing I find that helps me start that climb back up is showering as simple as that sounds. Give yourself time first, let yourself accept that yeah shit sucks right now but then get up, go shower, put on fresh clothes, and suddenly you'll feel a little less bad. It doesn't fix your problems but it makes you feel that little bit more ready to face them

[@radhikadhaipule3297]

I am in the middle of a UC flare amongst many other things that could go wrong (still privileged) and I clicked on your video coz I needed some comfort and your videos bring me comfort. But as soon as I heard Crohn's flare, I wanted to comfort you. This comment is a small attempt at that. I hope that the positive impact your videos have on me trickle down to you and bring you some comfort. Big hugs!

[@MF18-hb7ux]

Thanks for posting this. I'm an artist that went back for my MA by moving continents. I'm still trying to figure out how I fit so that I don't go back to grinding away and being a workaholic in fields that I'm good at but don't enrich me as a person, friend, artist etc. Life is hard, but it's much harder without reminders that all of us can go somewhere and do something better. It's also one of those times where a few important people to me are also going through some lows and I get waves of guilt for pursuing my dreams because I physically can't be there. That's hard for me, harder than the rest because I feel like I'm letting people down, even though rationally I know I'm not. I genuinely love your dominos and mosquitoes analogies. Have to remember to start small and chip away consistently to get to where we want to go. Thank you

[@thestorygirl2818]

this is such a beautiful video.. every time you show up with so much transparency and honesty.. we all feel so seen. The story of the friends camera.. UGH hit me so hard. I've totally been there where I spiral down and the longer I don't do something the bigger the amount of guilt I feel and its incredibly paralyzing. I have ADHD and getting admin done is my worst. Thanks again for your honesty and encouragement to all of us struggling out there!

[@ameba9918]

I have had this video on my watch later playlist since it got out, and didn't find the time to watch it. Don't know why but i started watching it just as background noise for cleaning and while on it i realized that maybe this was the exact video i needed for this period in my life. Thank you for this video, and well, for every other one. I find again and again that, even tho our circumstances are so different, i can apply so much of your learning to my life. What you do is so valuable !!!

[@neoenkida]

My own life is a continual work in progress, but one thing to add here from my end is to accept that sleep is a big part of your list of to-dos, and not doing "SLEEP" in order to get more other stuff done will actually fuck your life up even more than it already is. Hard to accept sometimes when the "emergency" task list seems mountainous, but that whole airline "put the mask on yourself before your children" mentality is so true. Getting down regular sleep as a part of the daily rountine (I know, easier said than done) is, I think, actually more important than getting down exercise as a part of the daily routine.

[@treshaqareen8396]

Honestly thanks to this channel I started using a 2 min rule, which is pretty much "push the smallest Domino first". Sometimes its hard for me to start something when there's endless list of things to do today, so I start with things which would take 2-5 min to do and build up my day from there. Works wonders (in my case). Thanks, Struthless!

[@cryzzal2737]

First thing: Thank you. Since about 2 years you and your videos are that motivational podcast to me and make me feel like I am not alone with my problems. My Girlfriend was in a bad mental state and absolute denial that life is any good lately. And after I felt like I was out of options I bought her a book. Your book (another tip that we received from you: “if you want someone to read a book don’t just recommend it buy it” (or sth in that sense)). To be honest I have to read it myself yet, but from her reaction and state it seems to be good and helpful. For me, the thing I do first, is hygiene. If my body is itchy and dirty I am not drowning in that pile of shit I AM that pile of shit. So I might shower, shave, do some skincare, brush my teeth, whatever feels necessary. You can’t clean with dirty hands. At the moment I was feeling overwhelmed by tasks. And now I went into hiding for a few days to catch a breath. Problem with that is, my tasks didn’t get less but more. But I now think I can get up and back to working on them again.

[@spennny1000]

I have literally been waiting for a video like this for like 2 years lol hi from england 🇬🇧

[@bloodorangemoon]

For me personally I’ve realized that I need to take myself out of my usual environment and do something different. I need that spark to jolt me out of a rut. Suddenly I’m invigorated even if I had been miserably stuck just before. Whether it’s visiting a new park or a day trip, weekend trip, hanging with a friend doing something new or out of my norm really helps me

[@LyndseyMacPherson]

SOOO much beauty in this film. That you've opened your heart and vulnerability in order to teach is astonishingly beautiful. Truth is beautiful, and there's so much hard truth in here we all need. To merely thank you feels completely inadequate. But also, this feels like one-third of what would be a handbook for being a human. Saving the link for this front and centre. (btw, gratz on surviving a move-those are always rough)

[@RaLunara]

A good analogy for the first response; just because someone's probably happier than you out there in the world, doesn't mean you shouldn't be happy for what you have. Likewise for sadness 🙌🏻

[@tincanowl3735]

I’m someone who struggles a lot with executive dysfunction, procrastination and focus. Your sorting tasks into bottle necks and mosquitos is a very good way of thinking sbout it, I’ve been doing a simplified version in my mind which helps and idk, might be helpful for anyone who needs even more simplicity but ye, my mantra; easiest first. Once you do the easy stuff, the hard stuff feels easier

[@nemsy8295]

thank you so much for your content! I'm in my 20s right now and your guidelines & tricks are so f*cking helpful. I feel kind of relieved every time after watching your videos. Lovely, take care

[@i-love-comountains3850]

The phrases "If this is the worst thing that happens, it's a good day." and "I've done worse for less and still showed up." and "I have a 100% success rate at surviving the absolute worst days of my life." have been really helpful. I struggle a lot with untreated ADHD, anxiety, and depression, so those phrases are running out of gas, and I just cannot seem to get out of my own way. Also trying and failing to stop drinking which is ruining my ability to sleep (for now) and driving my anxiety and depression up, and it just feels like I'm stuck in several feedback loops all connected together. Idk where I was going with this, but thank you for the video, struthless.❤

[@DavidLee-tz1sc]

I'm in one hell of a Rut! It's a cycle for me to go in and out of these things. In times of success I don't quite even know what I did but right now I need to dig out of this as it's becoming rather overwhelming and my emotional state is not great. It's my birthday tomorrow and I want to give myself this gift. I have a lot to do and a ton to live for! I want to look back on this day in a year and be proud of what I did. I really think the alternative is bleak to say the least. I'm sitting in my car listening to this video and I think it's really helpful. I'm book marking this as my moment to move up and out of this shit forever. Thanks for sharing your ideas I feel blessed to live in a time where we can access one another like this. Time to get to the hardest part and start taking the very first step. Good luck everyone 👍