Conan Asks The Property Brothers To Renovate Jordan Schlansky's Office | CONAN on TBS

CONAN Highlight: Just prior to quarantine, Conan called on Jonathan Scott and Drew Scott to help renovate Jordan Schlansky’s infamously filthy office.
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ABOUT CONAN ON TBS
Airing weeknights since 2010, CONAN on TBS is home to topical monologues, remote segments, celebrity interviews, musical performances and stand-up from the top comedians in the world. Watch highlights, outtakes and behind the scenes footage of Conan palling around with sidekick Andy Richter, tormenting Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky and playing the latest video games on Clueless Gamer.
ABOUT TEAM COCO
Team Coco is the KZbin home for all things Conan O’Brien and the Team Coco Podcast Network. Team Coco features over 25 years of comedy sketches, celebrity interviews and stand-up comedy sets from CONAN on TBS and Late Night with Conan O’Brien, as well as exclusive videos from podcasts like Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend, Literally! with Rob Lowe, Why Won’t You Date Me? with Nicole Byer, The Three Questions with Andy Richter, May I Elaborate? with JB Smoove and Scam Goddess with Laci Mosley.
Conan Asks The Property Brothers To Renovate Jordan Schlansky's Office | CONAN on TBS
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[@_Maxten]

i love how they always show the exact same picture of jordan whenever they introduce him

[@garrettpandow2041]

It’s jay leno

[@matth5734]

We wouldn't have it any other way!

[@karasushinigami5852]

I can actually hear the cheering

[@incessantdemise6974]

Never gets old

[@JoeYeezy]

except this time conan didnt say “and yes thats really him” ),:

[@MVahag]

- I know Italy very well Jordan: - So you have chosen death.

[@chicago2370]

Lmao

[@chicago2370]

Huh

[@filmnobelpreis]

Jordan is like a toxic fan of Italy.

[@nyamheria]

Lmaooo

[@hardrock7634]

Jordan sounds like Henry winkler in various roles and film titles such as “ night shift “

[@hanieldarrison]

conan looking like he about to teach us the dark arts with that hairstyle

[@gageoberst]

No way, Daniel watches Conan 😳😳

[@Nitromethanification]

Five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award- Conan O'Brien

[@not4coforyou375]

No way he looks just like lockhart

[@OleHopkinsBirdMilk]

It looks like he did a middle part on his hair to have someone slap it crooked

[@gigid9606]

ACTUALLY I LIKE IT BETTER

[@neil9897]

Ive noticed that poop jokes are jordan's kryptonite LMAOO

[@rhetiq9989]

Funny bcs poop jokes are generally believed to be the oldest, most immature and unfunny form of comedy these days. It's like this robot just learned the most basic concept of humor and is still in the process of learning more elaborate forms of it

[@ShermanKyle]

@@rhetiq9989 I think OP meant that poop jokes make Jordan break character in the bit

[@dizzyjosh9036]

@@ShermanKyle woooosh, hear that? thats the joke flying over your head

[@ShermanKyle]

@@dizzyjosh9036 word

[@simondewitt7161]

My first roommate in college was a lot like Jordan, not quite to such an extreme but he definitely shared a similar personality. That dude loved poop jokes and could burst out laughing just hearing a swear word... Weird dude, but not a bad guy, though I couldnt imagine that personality turned all the way up to 10 like Jordan.

[@jordanschlansky2800]

Unlike Conan I don't need external validation to confirm my cleanliness.

[@WAITWHUT-wl2uj]

And unlike conan, we viewers doesn't want to confirm his validation.

[@zomkino]

Stop pretending you are jordan dude..

[@rogerab1792]

never change Jordi, don't listen to these entitled psychos, you're the bravest in the room when you don't follow the sheeple

[@rogerab1792]

@@zomkino yeah, I wasn't sure whether it was him but had to try anyways just in case.

[@SerenityNow9015]

@@zomkino dude, we know it’s not him lmao. Don’t act like you’re intellectually superior just because you noticed he didn’t have a checkmark next to his username.

[@shreysarveshsrivastava8772]

Jordan would survive the brick room because he’s prepared his body in various ways

[@Orestes728]

He experiments with oats and whey

[@filmnobelpreis]

Running out of oxygen only affects... huh! Humans!

[@muchadoaboutnothingg]

@@Orestes728 Oxygen to him is irrelevant.

[@SJSU_Spartan]

Facts 🙌

[@chrisofstars]

The carbon dioxide would leave the room out of the sheer force of Jordan's contempt for it alone.

[@rushcap2761]

no, he's not short. he is in a room full of giants

[@6abhisekbackup9]

yeah, conan is 6'4 and so are the brothers

[@siyukiito3312]

Oh dear, if I am in the room with them, I may look like a toy doll because of my height 🤣

[@loudtaste1046]

@@siyukiito3312 5’5 it’s sucks

[@AllisonChains64]

Seriously! I never knew TPB were that tall! They're even a bit taller than Conan and that's crazy to think about lol

[@frigginirishloons]

It's true. He is probably of average height.

[@divefraggle]

I love Jordan calling him out for "knowing Italy very well" because he got married there. No way he's going to let that slide. 😂

[@dim9907]

As an Italian that’s actually the first thing I thought

[@HoneyMike]

When Conan makes Jordan laugh, that's like Joker making Batman laugh

[@bakerfresh]

I always like when he kind of breaks character and laughs, giggles or smirks. Is there anywhere with a normal interview of him. Is that really his job or is he just a character. With all the goofiness of the show, I wonder what he's really like. He's getting pretty gray. They really need to have the possible real Jordan come out.

[@whitestoneandy797]

That's legit the perfect analogy 👏👏

[@jrf9735]

bakerfresh the espresso machine episode is the one that he really struggles not to break character... I think it might’ve actually been either the first one he’s appeared in or one of the very first episodes.

[@ericc2530]

Can anyone confirm if it ever happened

[@whitestoneandy797]

Imagine one of your job duties is being around Conan when he is going all out and not laughing. He deserves his pay just for being able to do that alone. That's s a job few people could accomplish. But yeah Conan did make him brake a couple of times but that's still insanely good. Like inhumanely good

[@DannyKlimt]

It feels like a national holiday when a new Schlansky clip is uploaded. Or even better ...

[@SimplyApollo]

True bro

[@Dan17890]

Yes!

[@pedrosaresarces8381]

Hes loosing his skills, he broke a lot more this time.

[@tobiteam9685]

Better my friend. Way better

[@nithinrajan3877]

its an international event buddy😂

[@leedsdrumacademy]

It's official: Jordan's kryptonite is toilet humour.

[@michaelyang3910]

A man of culture I see.

[@cypresscitycomics1185]

Bro: "I got married in Italy, so I know Italy very well!" Jordan: "You say you got married in Italy, therefore you know Italy very well....are those two things necessarily connected?" Me: Oh Snap!?! 😂😂😂😂

[@Ianuarius]

He's got a point!

[@TRACKMAN810]

Thats like me saying "i watch Japanese anime i know japan really well"

[@nino0057]

He's right

[@mikays7059]

Jordan's right lol, what he said isn't related at all to the other

[@baloog8]

It's all relative but that guy said it out of a nervous energy. It wouldve been more agreeable to say I was married there so I'm familiar with Italy or I feel like I have some idea of the themes we can use here.

[@deejayxcrypt]

The thing is. Everything that comes out of Jordan’s mouth is, kind of, always true.

[@spaghettioverlord3247]

Not where karate kid 2 was shot.

[@deejayxcrypt]

Spaghetti overlord Aye. Well. He obviously wanted to keep it as a childhood memory; as it has no real other value. That was a real d*** move from Conan in that vid [and this time actually felt like it when there was no laughs :-( ]

[@BrianLopez-gz8ux]

​@@deejayxcrypt also when he tried to relate espresso with express ! IGNORANTE!

[@BrianLopez-gz8ux]

oil lekd this is what I get for believing everything on tv

[@Katya_Lastochka]

For the most part he's right. It's just things nobody cares about.

[@poppybell8217]

The combination of Jordan’s personality and his sloppiness is pretty rare.

[@mirrortoyourweakness9769]

Yeah, I know right? I paused the video to take a moment to try and understand it. Though, it doesn't matter to me.

[@georgina4193]

Really? He reminds me so much of my father 😅

[@carlosmccormick6544]

I expected someone like that to be a neat freak

[@mirrortoyourweakness9769]

@@carlosmccormick6544 Definitely. But he seems to be on the spectrum somewhere. I feel kind of bad for him. I'm not sure he's having the greatest time right now with everyone making fun of him. Though, Conan has shown he comes in late for work, doesn't do work etc. Maybe that's why he's messing with him like this. I don't know.

[@evaphoenix]

@@mirrortoyourweakness9769 I am pretty sure the dude plays a character. He is just so odd, I would be suprised if he was nearly as crazy as he comes across in these bits. Also if he truly objected to being the butt of Conans pranks he would have quit years ago. They have such a weird chemistry toghether, I love it when they do these scenes.

[@ChronoKatie]

I absolutely love that Jordan has gotten much sassier in recent years. When he talks back at Conan it's amazing.

[@Tensho_C]

It's called machine learning, and it's been making waves throughout the AI industry

[@Maraien]

I don't believe he is homosexual

[@bennypit4411]

The man looks to have aged 25 years in 6 years, dang.

[@jacksquat4140]

@@bennypit4411: The shots can be devastating.

[@acez6756]

@@Maraiendawg what😂 where did that come from 😂

[@yourfriendlyneighborhoodpi6655]

They think Jordan is weird for not pooping at work. But that's exactly what I do at school. My body has just designed itself to make sure I can't poop in our terrible bathrooms

[@jeanjacqueslundi3502]

I was always like that. I need to feel confortable.

[@candy2325]

Same here. I hate public restrooms and will wait when I get home.

[@mohammadabdelrahman786]

Saaaaame

[@rakuencallisto]

Worst name for a weak pooper.

[@2thomask]

I leave the stall door open to assert dominance

[@bl1896]

Lol. I never noticed Jordan’s door say “One cranky fake Italian.”

[@luxo199]

It’s been there a long while now, I found out about it last year 😂

[@K-A5]

He needs a Bless This Mess sign too

[@YooAreGreat]

Just saw it 😂

[@KlueTran]

can you give a time stamp?

[@zeusj5985]

Clueless_K 1:23

[@_Maxten]

Me: Reads "The Property Brothers" in the title: meh... Also Me: Reads "Jordan Schlansky" in the title: (Clicks)

[@bobbyboucher4101]

Crap! you were faster by 12 minutes. Almost exactly what i wanted to say!! Fack

[@amadeus4491]

Literally everybody

[@Cerebrosity]

You read my mind!

[@markmower6507]

Who are the property brothers, I have never heard of them? ! Hahahahahahahaha!

[@markmower6507]

@@bobbyboucher4101 think faster next time, or you may feel a "slight" electric shock, Hahahahahahahaha!

[@tasnimbari4012]

1:23 "One Cranky Fake Italian". best hidden gag i have seen in my life

[@kelcieox]

“i’m a deep thinker” *conan busts out laughing* got me 😂😂😂

[@ScammerPayback]

FINALLY.. Give the people what they want.. More Jordan Schlansky.

[@walnuthead]

Huh, didnt expect to see you here lol.

[@josephlittlefield2313]

For two hours anyway. He’s succumbed to hypoxia by now.

[@JaysonT975]

Next we need more of his assistant Mona!

[@walnuthead]

@@JaysonT975 lol mona

[@link0587]

YES!!!

[@LittleHieuy]

The animated CGI Jordan has more life in it's eyes than the real Jordan.

[@Gravydog316]

actually that was him

[@ArthurKnight1899]

Looks like Julius Caesar lol

[@AleksandarIvanov69]

2:55 - the tall guy got offended 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@10buffster]

6:54 Conan's mind is ingenious. So many things he spews out are so quick and often unnoticed.

[@ShermanKyle]

His wit is so sharp. Really a cut above the other late night hosts

[@thecheetos5785]

Lol

[@The-Rest-of-Us]

This video should have been 3 times as long. We were robbed.

[@alfonsomedina1609]

You just didn’t prepare you body in various ways

[@LavagreatThegreatnerdity_rocks]

Blame winnie the pooh

[@s10dlka]

Damn pandemic! When will the casualties end!

[@NandiCollector]

Jordan is the main reason I watch Conan clips.

[@hellterminator]

Above all, we were robbed, by the renovation not being done. I would _love_ to see Jordan in a tacky, over the top, fake Italian office.

[@benreider1982]

Jordan: opens his mouth Property Bro: you’re weird

[@rahmanhakim1]

That is not comedy, that is just straight up rude

[@courtneycombs5399]

It's pretty good comedy

[@gamingwithrsn]

@@rahmanhakim1 It's all a bit. Get your head out of your ass. Now that's rude.

[@11dubs30]

It's Bad comedy. If it was funny, it would have been worth the insult

[@anthonythudium5279]

1 for not funny

[@yellowhammer3]

The brothers did not want to laugh at the molestation joke 😂

[@Akira-jq6nj]

This is the second time that people came to clean his office 😂

[@dweeebles]

There are 3 giants towering Jordan 😂.

[@ricardobjj24]

How tall is Conan?

[@tunnaufal]

@@ricardobjj24 6'4

[@marcusb.7412]

Ricardo Masvidal he’s like 6’3-4

[@marcusb.7412]

They are all very tall though so it’s expected

[@MontyBurns21]

I love how the sign on the door reads. "One cranky fake Italian" bahahahahahaha

[@wyss85]

1:23 for the lazy ones

[@IWantsACoffee]

I love when Jordan breaks character! I can't believe he's able to stay in character for as long as he does in these skits.

[@RandysDirtyBurger]

Conan looking to the property brothers when he says celebrities don’t poop is one of the purest forms of gold I’ve ever seen 💀💀💀

[@liferiot]

"I'm a deep thinker-" (Conan bursts out laughing)

[@ricco5951]

Yes, I saw that too

[@BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n]

Yeah, they asked him What his hobbies are he says he is a deep thinker😂

[@nyamheria]

It’s because they where asking about his hobbies for the design lmao

[@fatihkaya7870]

I think that was the appropriate reaction

[@Dayvit78]

Even better laugh at 5:17 when Jordan says his body is on a natural rythm.

[@evanrobinson9807]

Jordan: Hardest man to break Also Jordan: Always breaks when poop/gas is brought up

[@matth5734]

Yes, remember him losing it in the train video.

[@KyleLe]

Matt H the human feces...

[@rayh.8456]

I was just listening to the Inside Conan episode the other day where they mentioned the only thing that consistently makes him break is poop jokes. So naturally they pull out the squatty potties for this remote lol

[@_Maxten]

@@matth5734 or when they went to the toilet showcase in japan

[@Vuusteri]

Human soil, if you will.

[@TheMargearet]

It’s interesting that he promotes his love of everything beautiful, but this office is an example that he doesn’t really live it.

[@kritimathur8005]

Jordan was trying so hard not to break character lol

[@yongwei5]

I think it's official. Whatever jokes with feces will make him break character lmao

[@anonymousreviewer169]

break*

[@yongwei5]

@@anonymousreviewer169 Thanks man

[@jakubkrizan]

You mean human soil, right?

[@yongwei5]

@@jakubkrizan That yes

[@tessmarsh5898]

I think these are the reasons I love Conan so much. The man went to Harvard and he’s still brought to tears by a poop joke.

[@balanzar61]

I've noticed that Jordan break's character when they bring up the topic of poop lol

[@stephanies3246]

I noticed that too at 5:26.

[@nebulousisgod]

And farts. He definitely has an immature sense of humor deep down, otherwise I doubt he could work on Conan this many years.

[@Moggetslittlesister]

He always makes the excuse that he's laughing at the fact that Conan finds poop and fart humor funny, but that's gotta be only half true.

[@Pacific_Norfweest]

He's definitely trying so hard not to laugh the entire time.

[@grapesofwraith1066]

In the Italy special, there’s a few clips of Jordan laughing when Conan plays fart sounds on his phone, and some outtakes where Jordan can’t stop laughing when he and Conan talk about poop and bidets!

[@amkow89]

Conan and the property brothers are so tall that jordan looks so little lol

[@Ryanfern99]

I feel like Conan would lace Jordan's biscotto with laxatives at the office just to prove a point 😂

[@Lydia-dd9bo]

Anyone notice Jordan's name plaque by his door says "One cranky fake italian" at 1:20 lol.

[@alexchan617]

Found you! Up you go

[@coltongnat]

That’s fantastic

[@juanjacobo8517]

Good eye 👁

[@anonym58063]

Its been there for years

[@puniopenetrante]

It've been there after the expresso machine episode.

[@badgerbandit9070]

"Their fame is of no importance to me" -Jordan Schlansky

[@J-IFWBR]

Jordan Schlansky just like the only human beeing oin the world

[@x2eXu50x]

when does he say that

[@chrislawrence6609]

@@x2eXu50x in the video above

[@Ahmed-Interrupted]

timestamp?

[@tabithiajones2511]

absolute chad

[@plansforus]

Every time Jordan breaks and angel gets it’s wings. I love the running relationship with him and Conan, it never gets old.

[@eighteen-naked-cowboys]

6:30 im glad they didn’t use cheap sound effects just silence and conan’s dead eye stare sells it so well

[@jema587]

I missed Jordan so much, lol. Seeing Jordan breaks character is the best.

[@miguelfabiao5318]

We all love him

[@vibsh625]

Always on the poop jokes.

[@JFinnerud]

Seems like he cracks up on toilet humor. Very evident in the Italian clips

[@BreakingJon]

@@vibsh625 I was thinking the exact same thing.

[@alx5192]

I missed the background laughs

[@ShellShocked398]

I’m sure Jordan prepared his body in various ways before this

[@ZombiEDDudE]

God how original

[@TheRedstonedeluxe]

I thought it was my turn to say that on any Jordan video

[@joaquin5028]

@@ZombiEDDudE imagine being a youtube comments cynic lmao what a loser

[@CoolPandaTheMovieNerd]

@@ZombiEDDudE Still funny. Go watch Kimmel, baby.

[@ZombiEDDudE]

Pandas are cool lmao ive been binging jordan and conan videos. And in every single one of em you get 15 guys commenting the same thing on every video. It was funny the first time but the 1000th? This is clearly a comment to gain likes. I dont even watch kimmel and fallon. Annoying ass fake laughs and rudeness to guests.

[@pvlkmrv]

Jordan nearly called the plastic squatty potty "lower class". He quickly corrects himself to say "lower quality".

[@thefirstguyjaek255]

I love how sophisticated Jordan tries to be when his office looks like it’s from an episode of Hoarders

[@SarAnna2195]

"What are your interests?" "I'm a deep thinker" 😂😂😂😂

[@LocoFaux]

Jordan cracks up whenever the topic of "Human soil" is brought up.

[@johnnyaxon_]

HUMAN SOIL

[@crh18]

apparently it's with the way Conan face does a certain look that breaks Jordan's cool stance

[@Otivitov]

Yes! I thought the same hahahah

[@marcosboero6881]

That train travel trough Italy was hilarious. Human soil.

[@DonDon-fs2tl]

666 likes ummmmmm nope

[@KhoaLe-jm4sv]

Jordan's laugh wrinkles show that he's laughed a lot. Makes it more amazing that he keeps such a poker face on camera!

[@Ilovemyfriends3]

It’s been years and I still can’t believe this is a real person unscripted and not filtered.

[@krrisss]

I love how views just booms whenever there's "Jordan Schlansky" in the title

[@getpumped87]

Or Sona

[@paige4886]

Or Andy

[@kyles8524]

its cause everyone wants to see him fired lol

[@turki9972]

a genuine character

[@whyFreezer]

Conan and Jordan is a hilarious combination.

[@TheWonderfulBlake]

Jordan: “You men clearly have an agenda. I’m going to remain passive in the situation. Why don’t you do as you intend?” Conan: “Oh my god, is that what you say before you’re molested?” Hilarious.

[@Onlymelan8e]

CONAN IS TRYING TO GROW HIS HAIR OUT LIKE BLAKE STACKHOUSE. THAT IS COOL BUT I AM STILL NOT VOTING FOR DEMONCRATS

[@Onlymelan8e]

IF YOU EVER ROPE A KITTEN, YOUR SOUL WILL DIMINISH. YOUR SOUL DIMINISHING DOESNT FEEL GOOD

[@hasaniwu]

@@Onlymelan8e i lost braincells reading your comment. Please educate yourself.

[@JG-no4qr]

Rope Kittens - Hilarious!

[@CrazyStupidGamers]

And people say rape jokes can't be hilarious!

[@venkateshpotter1685]

Like many mysteries in the world the question " why jordan office does not consistent with his idealogy" remains mystery since Conan retired.

[@asarsealex]

I'm with Jordan on that one. "I got married in Italy and therefore I know Italy really well". Ridiculous thing to say

[@Acridobject]

yeah lol he wasnt ready for jordans response.

[@bootykingnadal]

Right?! The man traveled there more than 25 times lol

[@Naegimaggu]

100% agree. It seems that for Americans the standard for knowing something about the world outside US is pretty low. I mean there are people who seem to think they're normal who can't even name the continents from a map, nevermind the countries.

[@wn8022]

The brothers are actually Canadian. Still, a stupid thing to say. One trip and he’s an expert. Lol

[@oceanpunch4723]

Still unnecessary to call him out like that while he's trying to connect lol

[@wilthomas]

Conan and Jordan are absolute geniuses with their sense of timing.

[@robinsonbalbuena9958]

This had me laughing, in tears. Conan and Jordan need to make a movie

[@zorilaz]

True like a vacation somewhere and they find trouble somewhere and break stuff by accident and run

[@theirishman9182]

2:50 Jordan is definitely right here

[@Naruto-rv1tu]

Therapist: Animated Schlansky isn't real, he can't hurt you Animated Schlansky: 8:22

[@Snoy_Fly]

Jordan has to be the most sophisticated “slob” in the world.

[@JohnnyWestMagic]

He's got to be a Virgo; highly intelligent but exhibiting so many of the sign's negative traits.

[@nanabanana0743]

Johnny West Magician He’s an Aries actually.

[@JohnnyWestMagic]

@@nanabanana0743 Wow, you know your Shclanskys!

[@brendantaylor3570]

Johnny West Magician Virgo Ascendant perhaps?

[@JohnnyWestMagic]

@@brendantaylor3570 Could be-just know it's the funniest spots Conan does. I put them at the end of my "Agelina" vid-the restaurant scene.

[@CesarDaSalad]

It's so nice to see that after all these years Jordan Schlansky is still... well, Jordan Schlansky.

[@TheKeebster1]

"One cranky fake italian" is his door sign 🤣 1:20

[@fakecharity]

They make Conan look like he's regular/average height.

[@moozinho8667]

Seriously they’re giants

[@purplesaori]

I was walking one day on the street and noticed a very tall red hair guy, it was none other than Conan himself. I’m just 164 cm tall, it was like passing by a super tall tower 🤣 (I know, I know, but seriously, the man is reaaaally tall!)

[@zaidtayeh5899]

꧁Saori ꧂ m

[@largomentatoreeloquente165]

@@purplesaori Yeah Red dudes are cool asf

[@muhammadputera6593]

@james avery *Conan

[@karakuri002]

He's not weird, infact he is 100% correct, the fact you got married in Italy doesn't back up you know the place very well.

[@papagena1]

Yeah, but you don’t say it out loud unless you’re a sociopath.

[@yesloow]

I agree. And I'm on the side of you don't say you know Italy well just because you got married there out loud. I'm with Schlansky on this one.

[@dimitrisathanasiou1521]

It's the cheap salesman talk. Like saying i know italy coz i eat alot of pizza

[@joakimkarlsson8392]

I don't know if you are sarcastic but he said it as a joke

[@donnamariedemaio]

Knowing Italy very well is probably the reason he wanted to get married there. He just expressed it incorrectly. To know Italy is to love Italy, particularly the foot of the boot! Ciao! 🇮🇹

[@juweriajaweed6044]

"one cranky fake italian" 205, only conan could carry this joke so far loll

[@ahmad_serendipity]

How did I miss this one !!! It's funny this is the 1st time the guests actively joins Conan in trolling Jordan ! 😂

[@Pacific_Norfweest]

I love that someone on staff was told "Find a clip during one of Conan's interviews where it looks like he's taking a dump." Cue Sean Penn explaining anything.

[@Alex_1729]

Also Sean Penn is a bit of an idiot, he even wrote a letter to Matt Stone and Tray Parker and complained about Team America, the only dude that complained about that movie. And have you read his book? His book is the most ridiculous stuff ever put on paper or digital, and not for humour... Here are a few quotes from Sean Penn's book "Bob Honey Who Just Do Stuff": "Hence, his life remains incessantly infused with her indentity-infidelity, and her abhorrent ascensions to those constant salacious sessions of sexual solitaire she'd seen as self-regard." - page 11 "Whenever he felt these collisions of incubus and succubus, he punched his way out of the proletariat with the purposeful inputting of covert codes, thereby drawing distraction through Scottsdale deployments, dodging the ambush of innocents astray, evading the viscount vogue of Viagratic assaults on virtual vaginas, or worse, falling passively into prosaic passtimes." - page 36 "Behind decorative gabion walls, an elderly neighbor sits centurion on his porch watching Bob with surreptitious soupçon." - page 71

[@executioner_ecgbert884]

Not everybody handles fame and attention very well. He's just a human, but some of his roles were pretty good.

[@Alex_1729]

@@executioner_ecgbert884 nobody forced him to be an actor. Nobody forced him to write a letter to South Park guys and complain. Nobody forced him to write that stupid book. He's hilarious

[@saeedvazirian]

@@Alex_1729 huh, that team america was garbage made for right wing nut. it literally argued that middle eastern don't deserve to live. You read and remembered the exact pages, lmao you're salty.

[@georgekirby7150]

Sean Penn is insufferable... The way he used that Mexican actress to meet El Chapo showed me how he might actually be evil...

[@chovue2363]

"Im surprise you are caught unaware so often" is a line i would have never thought was linked to taking a dump. 🤣🤣🤣

[@Aaackermann]

Jordans burn of this tool was just brilliant! He absolutely got a point there.

[@Rayan-jd9sc]

5:36 homelander is that you!!?😂

[@tinaaneke]

One thing I know that will stay constant in life: is whenever Jordan has a segment they will use that one headshot/photo of him from like the writers strike.

[@robbieclark7828]

The year 2034: Old man Conan brings Jordan out on the show on the day of his retirement from the position of associate producer. Jordan looks the same as he does in the headshot they use to introduce him.

[@jimmyhilley6706]

@@robbieclark7828 YES PLEASE!!!

[@HeresJohnnyYT]

YESSSS MORE JORDAN!!!!

[@etapoopoo2946]

HOW

[@lutchdomanengroomupadiachy2743]

Jordan for street pranks ???

[@rcrichard8969]

i don't like jordan

[@arkanix4900]

@@rcrichard8969 no one ask you

[@amirmoezz]

I love Jordan, always wanted to see more of him. 💕 He always made my day.

[@lilsyevasifuentes7628]

7:26 "Actually, I'd be happy with that" 😆

[@Tdore01]

Conan will never not make me laugh. Such a funny dude even the stuff he says that in society now adays is considered to far to joke about he makes it sound harmless and that’s a hard thing to do

[@deekay3251]

Poop humor does seem to be the one thing that makes Jordan laugh.

[@serbonkers4130]

He secretly love south park.

[@anonym58063]

Human soil.

[@fixtureorbit1825]

2:55 when the guy said "you're weird " to jordan's face , ngl i got offended.

[@bens0nbernard]

“This human body we have all been given” what an Alien lol

[@markportuondo2483]

In his case the human host body he invaded against the owners will : D

[@piddlesmcgee]

1:23 his nameplate just says “One Cranky Fake Italian” I just noticed that

[@aguy6641]

I think they could do an amazing extended version of all these Schlansky videos they're great.

[@gumpcard]

"You say you got married in Italy therefore you know Italy very well. Are those two things necessarily connected?" So much yes on the shade, Jordan! :D All the beard dude could do was reply with an ad hominem.

[@edmissonmassingue6140]

Who liked this because he know's what ad hominem is? 😏

[@123Crew123]

He didnt use ad hominem, he just said that he did his research(about Italy). It was pretty sufficent reply.

[@adamrado]

“I will not eat green eggs and ham I will not defecate Sam I Am.” Lmaooo

[@nikonikic1676]

Conan and Jordan interaction is the best of the show ever. Id watch them travel the world more than any show ever made. Id pay money for it

[@1SUPERNAUT1]

He almost laughed, for an instant there i thought he was gonna break but he pulled it back in, my respects to you Jordan, holding in ones laugh near Conan is a testament of your self control

[@ahmarsaeed6085]

When he said “I’m a deep thinker” I burst out laughing just as Conan did! 😂

[@benb6527]

This really showcases the delicacy of Conan's mockery of Jordan, vs. the property brother's clumsy quips.

[@jetnut89]

Its the difference between roasting and insulting. You only roast the ones you love and clearly the property brothers are just being mean to him.

[@urbanmari]

They're intelligent guys who react without meanness but with natural disdain. The guy is clearly detached and not socially well-adapted. There is probably some underlying cause. For the context of him working for the comedian, Conan, Jordan serves his purpose.

[@nathantseng8513]

daisy jordan isn’t actually like this in real life, he’s playing a very over-exaggerated version of himself. if you look into it a little more you’ll find videos of him laughing and talking and acting like you would expect a normal person would. there was this video where conan and jordan were in italy on a train having a conversation and in it jordan was laughing and talking, which is super unlike his character on coco.

[@duarteolebreiro]

1:22 “One cranky fake italian” on his door… 🤣🤣

[@toricarlini4474]

I feel like this is most fun these two brothers had in a while with this skit.

[@fullduck97]

Jordan is secretly a Simpsons character Conan made and wished to life

[@Gravydog316]

secretly?

[@playasadonejoe]

There's some cryptozoological term for a monster that is brought into being through sheer power of belief.

[@juliecheeseberg7100]

@@playasadonejoe a tulpa

[@jamesliu8101]

Every. Time. Poop-related talk breaks Jordan every time.

[@amandacrook9673]

I love Conan! These short videos are so fun!

[@ep6507]

So glad I found this video!

[@santus07]

"I've prepared my body in various ways" Jordan back in the day. "My body is on a natural Rhythm" Jordan 2020

[@stevethea5250]

Stamp

[@synchronicitystudios8217]

🤣

[@JacksonDreyer]

It’s in a real circadian rythym

[@DreistStudios]

@1:23 “one cranky fake Italian “ 😆

[@jepjep216]

😂😂

[@dr.debajyotibose2928]

Good catch

[@foggyfrogy]

omg it's still there XD ahahaha

[@nazzan3801]

😂 😂 amazing observation

[@nickhadzaman3848]

@@foggyfrogy when did they put it in

[@almondcris0182]

i love how conans hair it’s like Johnny bravo

[@marvincool3744]

They all have a great group chemistry

[@fakir69]

Here is a contradiction: the man who keeps two squatty potties in his office never poops at work.

[@thomasthemenace]

That's why they are still unpacked, duh.

[@x-12x-361]

i dunno, maybe he wanted to give one to a friend

[@drednal1558]

I wonder if he gets packages sent to his office instead of his house.

[@adamdavenport8009]

He doesn't evacuate his body in various locations.

[@Mr1031964]

Great Profile pic. 👍

[@hellochely687]

Saw this on FB and ran over here to make sure I’d seen this 😂 I have, and will rewatch now 🤣🤣😍 🍿

[@dc1397]

It is amazing how quickly a conversation will devolve.

[@jordonschlansky]

You gentleman clearly have an agenda, I am gonna remain passive in this situation.

[@justinp2546]

🤣😂🤣😂

[@S1D3_1]

YOU BROKE CHARACTER LOL

[@MichaelP0418]

Is that what you say before you're molested!? 🤣😂

[@triplefresh3339]

@@MichaelP0418 oh god why no

[@robm.8946]

He will remain passive like the catcher he is