The beautiful reality of autism | Guy Shahar | TEDxWandsworth

In this talk, Guy uses the experiences and insights that he has gathered in his years as the father of an autistic boy to propose a radically different perspective on autism. Far from being a disability characterised by a set of accepted difficulties, he suggests that the underlying condition that gives rise to what we call autism is in fact one to be cherished.
Guy Shahar is an author and autism consultant. His Transforming Autism project raises awareness of the positive aspects of the condition and empowers other parents to understand and value their autistic children, and to dramatically improve their experience of life by creating an environment of trust and love around them.
For more information visit transformingautism.co.uk/
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx

[@shinybee1263]

When we're in a comfortable environment with an acceptance of us being somewhat different, we function much more comfortably

[@fummyelle7160]

Research Suramin

[@reubination]

But the trick is to find people willing to accept you for you rather than your potential. Especially financially.

[@heryzo-prdk]

@@reubination indeed. And that's the hardest part

[@heryzo-prdk]

always appreciate those insight from those who know. thank you

[@godrocksmyworld2001]

the hard part is to find a comfortable environment in which we are able to function much more comfortably

[@TheHeartofStillness]

As an autistic adult I've never NEVER heard anyone enunciate so clearly and accurately who we are. This man does it perfectly. I wept through this entire video...spot on sir, spot on. Spot on, I'm still in tears. You have it right!

[@favs323]

I cried too. My 21-year-old daughter is autistic & this is so brilliant! ❤️

[@Bozewani]

I had to escape institutional ableism from the healthcare and educational system healing from that is like South Africa healing from apartheid everytime I visited one of these 'experts" I heard the same drivel YOU CANNOT DO ANYTHING YOU ARE BROKEN YOU ARE DEFECTIVE YOU ARE WRONG healing from that

[@moodybassist]

I’m speechless, he said it perfectly. It was impossible for me to articulate how I felt but he did it.

[@Alienami]

Me too, Joseph... which is also my name, so ditto x2!

[@christinlgoff]

I agree wholeheartedly with this presenter. How perfect was his explanation and his call to action. I have always felt that autistic people have so much to share and show and feel. The world needs to shed some of its harshness and foster bridges of understanding.... this way we allow connections and relationships between all people to germinate and grow. Thanks so much to him.

[@euanelliott3613]

Born autistic, and also schizophrenic since age 18. To this day, no addictions and no criminal behaviour. I am a very strong character and I live my life alone. I need no relationship to validate my worth. I care about people who do not care about me, as I don't expect any return. I am proud to be part of this community. God bless you all XX.

[@mislavkrznaric1635]

I'm proud of you

[@danielmoore4024]

@@oliver8459 Be glad to be Autistic, research shows the ones with the problem are neurotypical people. Concerning social researchers have flipped the question over and began testing how good are neurotypical people at reading autistic people, and the results are they're apporling. It's clear to the researchers that neurotypical people rejecting diversity is the problem.

[@believeraakifah720]

The world needs autistic and schizophrenic people.

[@123Mathzak]

@@oliver8459 You’re part of the human race, aren’t you? And isn’t it great? 😁

[@robincrowflies]

@Mary Joseph Why not try emailing this man, at Transforming Autism? Also, wherever you live there should be help. You can start by asking at the library. They can connect you with information and services.

[@NothingByHalves]

I'm 52 and learned that I was autistic less than a year ago. When I was five years old and playing with other kids on our street, I clearly remember thinking "why can't everyone just be NICE to each other?" and if you don't like someone, that's fine, just leave them alone. This presentation totally burst my heart open - bless you for your understanding. I am still seeking an environment that fits.

[@edwinhill413]

I want to share about a herbal recommendations I got about Dr Oyalo on KZbin and his herbal remedy which work perfectly on my sons improvements and social skill till now. He now speakers in sentences, responds to name and instructions, no more aggressiveness and many more unlike him before

[@Sonnypuss]

I'm exactly the same age as you and also autistic. I'm that super sensitive soul that hurts for everyone I see upset. Thank you for this beautiful talk.

[@turtleanton6539]

Yes

[@squidward6187]

The biggest misconception about aspies is that we lack empathy. That is the neurotypical perception of us because they want to have their egos stroked constantly and we don't do that. I won't stroke someone's ego just because they want me to - it's not because I lack empathy it's because I don't like narcissism. Neurotypicals worship narcissism. We don't. We prefer humility.

[@sharonjensen3016]

Neurotypicals prefer to make assumptions instead of improvements. It's a blessing to meet one who knows how to ask instead of just guess.

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@lioncat79]

As an autistic person, I now see it as a gift, rather than a curse.

[@janrock2462]

Thank you for this important message. I am raising my autistic grand daughter. She cries if she hears a baby crying, she gets over whelmed when shopping in a crowd. She has her feelings hurt when class mates say hurtful statements to her, then told by the adults to grow up. No one at her school is educated in autism. She's alone . I fight for her every day. She depends on me alone. I want to home school her the last three years of her education. During this lockdown I have been teaching her about government, science, religion, her systems in her body and what each does. She is so excited about learning everything at her level and ability. She is 15 now and is still a little girl. Who believes in santa, the Easter bunny, in magical places and you know that's ok. She is my darling child who was given up by both parents. By her maternal grandparents. Aunts and uncles all out of her life. She will be a strong person when I pass you know why she is determined to live on her own. We have the best bank manager ever. He is willing to continue to take care of her money

[@KELLYCASBOLT]

My daughter is nearly 15 and sounds very similar to your granddaughter. We have homeschooled her for 5 years, best thing I ever did for her. Sounds like she has an amazing advocate in you

[@waheednazir9384]

How you do

[@screwloose18]

You are amazing!

[@Dasckolar]

Taking care of your granddaughter when no one else would because of a so called “disability” is the definition of a saint.

[@wolfiethehedgehog3900]

By heaven almighty; you're such a fighter. Bless your heart for taking good care of such a wonderful young girl! I myself am a female diagnosed with Asperger's, and can relate to a few of those things; like being emotionally sensitive-- wanting to cry when a baby/someone I care about is crying-- and loving to learn new things, especially in science. I am currently 18, and have had great support from friends, family, and teachers. I am sure she will thrive thanks to you and your hard efforts. Bless your kindhearted soul.

[@krisherrick4261]

I'm 28 and just learned I'm autistic. This video tells our story with so much kindness and insight and captures the critical difference between the medical and social models of disability--people are dialed by society and can emerge from it with the right support. We do not need a cure, we need compassion and acceptance!

[@brucewayne3074]

Don't nobody want it, we hella hot at the moment! We're comin' for all opponents, it feel incredible don't it? It really ain't a thang, who get 'em crazy goin' orangutan! It's been a wreck, been a debt! When a head-on collision is in effect from a Tech! The other side is accursed! They have a lot of 'regerts'! My creation is shaking the planet Earth!

[@GreyPunkWolf]

@Odette Mariposa You just didn't find yet good people to bind with, but you will eventually. And then they, as you, will understand how gifted you really are. I used to think like you all childhood, now I really feel sorry for unempathic people as they probably won't ever understand the world the way I do. And I think overempathic people such as ourselves should definately be taken more seriously when it comes to taking big decisions that may impact others. You may not see it yet but you will. Just create yourself a better social environnement if you don't have a good enough one. I don't mean "just create it" like it's easy btw, I just think you need to set preliminary goals before trying to reach your other greater goals whatever they might be.

[@benthomas1741]

I think we need cure, my friend, as a professional researcher agent. We need it, you as saying we dont need cure you dont know nothing whats going on the world.

[@PixelaGames2000]

I agree compassion and acceptance is what we need from the world right now

[@darlinspaces]

I am not ASD but I agree with you. I feel like I know a bit how it feels because when I had PTSD a MD wrote it off as a multiple personality disorder, they didnt want to ask me anything, just push me into a box. It took me about 8 long hard years to adjust but I dont ask anyone change the world for me or ask too much, just acceptance that sometimes, we learn a bit slower and need patience.

[@armadilloalien854]

This is the most correct video on this site that I have seen a parent explain how they saw the autism spectrum.

[@racheltam1458]

The only thing about this entire video that wasn't absolutely pitch perfect - and truly it was pitch perfect from start to finish within the parameters they set out - is everyone seems to forget that autistic children become, if they're able to withstand the environment they're so often drowning in, autistic adults. These needs, these experiences, these attributes don't vanish as we get older. If anything they get more intense, the world around us gets less accommodating of them, and the night-and-day difference it makes to our level of functioning and ability to cope - let alone thrive - is even more devastating. But he describes the condition so perfectly and so beautifully. For many of us, it is a gift, no matter how high a price the rest of society makes us pay for it.

[@derksenjenny]

You are very correct as an adult on the autism spectrum, I can't assure you that feelings emotions positive and negative are extremely overwhelming, everything enters our brain unfiltered, if i see someone in pain I feel it intensely, but also emotional music hits me , the sadness of others etc , my husband is also autistic and when we watch a movie we have to skip the sad parts , for example we don't watch the end of the movie King Kong where he get killed , it does to much with our emotions , I'm glad you could help your son

[@tashlan4164]

I can't watch animal rescue shows because they may say something like "poor Spot didn't make it" and this can upset me for days, making me cry just at the thought of it. I didn't realise that I shut down a lot and not because I don't care but because I care too much and it overwhelms me. It is so true about the 'too much information' too. I avoid crowds of people because to me, they are like a wall of colour, sounds and emotions stampeding towards me. I have been called anti-social, but actually I am not, I just can't deal with a lot of people all at once or even a few people over a long period of time.

[@elizabethbennet4791]

@@tashlan4164 Ong then definitely never watch a dog's life with dennis quaid, that movie is about a dog that reincarnates and dies several times and reunites with his owner at the end.

[@canndydrivegaming9831]

Jenny Derksen I taught I was the only one who suffer from emotions and sad stuff in public I just try to set my emotions under pressure

[@nitefox4411]

@@tashlan4164 Excellent. "Poor spot didn't make it." Crying and LMAO at the truth of it. Authentic we are.

[@julesjules5439]

My son is autistic. He used to watch the movie Planes. There’s a part where Dusty is about to crash and every time my son would get upset and cry. Autistic people do have empathy an abundance of empathy

[@alsonngambom09]

As an autistic parents this brings hope. My son is 4 and half. He didn't speak, he had frequent meltdown, he dont respond to his name. I am really really worried that this will last in his lifelong. But now i have some hope

[@samuelmaina4729]

There is hope my dear, he will respond to his name in time..my daughter is 4 too and until 2months ago, she could not even show signs of recognizing her name..now its different..she will not answer when you call but she will show awareness...she has even learnt to perform a few tasks...its a matter of patience and showing them love..dont let him notice your worry..he will be okay

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@Maria-up2yv]

he has such a friendly voice, he would make an amazing teacher

[@bodebo69]

At 63 I finally heard the story of my life! Thank you very much!

[@gauravbajpayee1628]

Happy for u💓

[@nickwijker1990]

The story of the dog eating the cat food.. it resonated with me. When I was about 6 or 7, i went to see the hunchback of the notredame in the theatre with my dad. During the break we went home because of my uncontrollable crying. I couldnt stand watching that poor guy getting bullied by the entire town.

[@MsSharon2011]

As the parent of a child with exactly the same sensitivities as your son I cannot tell you how much this has touched my heart . We follow PACT therapy through an amazing team in Manchester and cannot believe the results we have had in our sons confidence and communication. And indeed mine as a parent ....... I just take things at my sons pace . Our children do not need to change so we can communicate with them , we need to change so they can communicate with us !!.

[@brucewayne3074]

I'm friends with the monster that's under my bed! I get along with the voices inside of my head! You're trying to chase me, stop holding your breath! You think I'm crazy, yeah you think I'm crazy! Well that's not fair! Whoah! Whoah!

[@annabethgrace5432]

I want more parents in the world like you, who put their children's well-being and ability to thrive above preconceived assumptions of what they should be.

[@xxbouncer19xx]

I didn't speak until I was 5 now by the age of 24 I achieved to master 3 different languages don't loose hope and God bless you and your kid

[@Hadikhan78678]

My son he is also autistic. I live in Manchester can I have a address please for pact therapy thank you.

[@heryzo-prdk]

indeed. This also requires work on our side, as parents

[@donovinmatthews1827]

I love my autistic daughter with all my heart and soul. This video made me cry.

[@gnomesukno]

Great talk. It is amazing how much has changed with my son after changing our environment to better suite him. Autism is not a disease, it is simply characteristics of a person.

[@heryzo-prdk]

love to hear those positive changes. Hope thinks are going well your side

[@PixelaGames2000]

Yes exactly as an autistic person I can say That we are not defective we are not broken And we do not need a cure We are just different and we need compassion and acceptance There are ways to help people with autism function in the world but you’ve got to do it carefully

[@cvmslvt420]

It’s not a disease, it’s a condition, and all conditions especially mental ones are characteristics

[@jennyhughes4474]

Those of us with acquired brain injury (ABI) have so much in common with those diagnosed as autistic, I wish more people understood - for all of us!

[@melanieberlier8487]

🙏💗 Thank you. We are left so vulnerable in this harsh world and greatly misunderstood.

[@moondust1979]

Genius speech. I’ve always thought my son as highly sensitive. He picks up on too much info, he covers his ears from fire drills, he used to cry when i used to play a lullaby saying it makes him sad. A lot of lullabys actually do have a sad undertone in their music being slow and sleepy. Even though he struggles to talk to make friends i know my boy is a genius.

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@YennyFD]

This vídeo should be translated in other languages. This is the best perception of autism from a natural and humanizing view that I have ever watched. Thanks!.

[@jacks2222]

"so deeply connected to the surroundings it's overwhelming".. Yes! That's exactly how it feels! And from 13mins onwards.. We came to change the world, to teach another way. Gosh, thank you for understanding all this and voicing it from the neuro "typical" perspective.

[@guyshahar]

I'm actually autistic myself, but didn't know this when I did the talk....

[@jacks2222]

@@guyshahar ahh that explains your authentic understanding. 😊

[@Dasckolar]

I’m 20 years old and I just learned that I am autistic, I used to think differently about myself because of my disability because it makes so much sense of what was wrong with me, but watching this video gives me a little bit of hope because I do love people and I do want the best for everybody because in hindsight everybody does and that’s what I like to believe. Humanity itself it’s a whole mess, but we have the capacity to do such good and that’s what we need to aim for, and we all know we need to do it together and we need to respect and love each other do that. The time of savage human civilizations are over and now we must evolve to a more brighter more united future together

[@little_flitter]

I was half listening to this whilst tidying, as soon as he said about the nature being one of extreme sensitivity, I stopped. So well said. I love this so much. I'm high functioning asd 👌

[@AmirKhan-uk2ml]

We can understand as a parent of that child. 😭 How the world is cruel to these kids..

[@edwinhill413]

My child has improved full and acting up right with his social skill since taking dr Oyalo herbal remedy. He has no major signs of autism like he was since I got the herbs. Doc herbs work perfectly

[@sbsman4998]

This video is right on Guy! At age 72 and living independently my parents must have done something right. Embarrassed they were, but they were autistic too and who knew anything back then when conformity ruled the day--as now!! My saving grace was a mother that allowed me private space, quiet study times of my choosing and plenty of Italian food :) My father directed my perfectionism, giving me a fine craft to work my hands (directed stimming) and a method to know people gaining status making bucks. Autistics are natural tradesmen/warriors and indeed were breed for it! Our state of mind is a wonderful gift when your NOT constantly surrounded by misunderstandings from others. My conclusion after over 7 decades of daily struggle living well with it is ~~~> "best cultivate the art of solitude early without guilt". Good luck with the lad, he is lucky lovely boy.

[@ironturkey]

I love you

[@sbsman4998]

Hi Beraud , whole family ended up being Machinists.

[@Rippenhengst]

You're one of the lucky ones, that don't suffering from severe autism. I grew up with five siblings, our eldest brother was/is severely autistic. He beat our parents into a lump, before our eyes. I don't know how many times we were in hospital, because of uncountable attacks. He' s living in a closed institution now. No group home could handle him. It's a terrible condition, i wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

[@Samantha1lady2gotic]

@@Rippenhengst that's not autism fault, that's the point of the video

[@nitefox4411]

Right with you SBS man. My early developmental years looked just like a Mifne video. Conceived in early boot camp as dad headed for Vietnam. Only child, only grand child, only neice/nephew, "I" was the living legacy of my dad...and my family did whatever it took to encourage engagement instead of just staring at Christmas lights all the time. I was played with like a puppy. Please tell us your craft. Mine was leading exercises with individuals... 27 years. Fired after I needed to multi task more and speed up productivity. Had a melt down at work. 1st psychiatrist diagnosed ASD after 4 years...he died unexpectedly so new psychiatrist says ASD MUST be diagnosed before 18. He claims I am lazy and writes I am crazy. It was a good run. Heading for homelessness now that all family is dead. Just part of it though. Very happy to hear so many more autistics are being diagnosed today. I lived over half a century and was never "diagnosed" formally because unless someone was severe low functioning, they didn't get a diagnosis. Best to you and way to go to you and your family to make ASD your gift not a handicap.

[@hexdiana7566]

I cried with this video as you described my little one, she feels deeply the suffering of others and also the joy ! She is such emphatic and sweet soul.

[@danielmoore4024]

Diana Erika Reyes, I feel this sensitivity whenever I'm unoccupied, thinking about all the people around me struggling, I find it so sad people say "it's acceptable" when I can see what they call acceptable will make people suffer in the long run. Consuming unhealthy addictive substances for example. I see the consumer is already getting hurt and is the cause of making others suffer. When they become sick and unfit to work they'll be put on benefits, as more people get put on benefits the suffering expands. Since there's more on the benefit system they're going to require more money, then the Department of Work and Pensions will get that money through job cuts, redundancy, wage reductions, increased council taxes, more exhaustion for people covering the time the redundant people were fulfilling. Then these have such a negative impact on the lives of people who are trying to do good for others.

[@heryzo-prdk]

wishing for the best foe your daughter

[@eva-lottakastilanezer7112]

I agree completely. I have felt that sensitivity was the real reason for what we call autism. My child got her diagnoses at 13 yo and I am waiting for mine. It is time for to dream forward a world that works for sensitives. All people would thrive.

[@rosetteramos4148]

i don’t want to cry but I did. thank you so much for this talk.

[@treemoth]

Wow amazing , thankyou so much. My son is 37 and as yet undiagnosed. Once when he and I were at a festival someone said to me your son has what all these other people are seeking. She said that he had approached her when she arrived and put his hand on his heart when he greeted her. He plays so well with children and animals but in much of his life he becomes overwhelmed. You have made it clearer to me what diagnosis he should pursue because I recognise the picture.

[@edwinhill413]

I want to share about a herbal recommendations I got about Dr Oyalo on KZbin and his herbal remedy which work perfectly on my sons improvements and social skill till now. He now speakers in sentences, responds to name and instructions, no more aggressiveness and many more unlike him before

[@dalilasilva8384]

This is one of the most beautiful and precious videos about autism. This clarify so much of the spectrum, explain a lot about the overwhelming autistics feels about feelings, images, emotions, stories... this helps a lot parents that are clueless about their behavior like fear without explanation, sadness, meltdowns that seems to be not linked to anything perceivable by them, but that can be triggered by something too sutil to be noticed. One of the best videos I´ve ever seem. Congrats for this brilliant father for his conclusions and by sharing this with everybody else.

[@maringarcia2503]

One of the great things the internet and KZbin has done is getting all this great content and education across the world.

[@anitastinson6268]

This is one of the best videos on Autism I have ever seen. I totally agree with what you say ....especially at the end of it!!!! I am autistic. I pray the more and more people come to your way of thinking.

[@MrMjdc]

WOW! I have a brother with autism, and this really moved me. In fact I still remember when the head boy at our school who has a brother with special needs did a similar assembly, I was in year 8, I couldn't stop crying.

[@lost_boy]

This was a beautiful speech ❤️ I’ve always just thought I was weak for letting the world hurt me so much, and my father used to say “stop being so sensitive!” all the time. I wish I could’ve shown him this video before he passed.

[@edwinhill413]

I want to share about a herbal recommendations I got about Dr Oyalo on KZbin and his herbal remedy which work perfectly on my sons improvements and social skill till now. He now speakers in sentences, responds to name and instructions, no more aggressiveness and many more unlike him before

[@grandimations7309]

This is just beautiful. This perfectly captures my life and most likely, a lot of others lives' as well.

[@IVTMOFFICIAL]

Yeah man me to

[@Gydjulind]

Thank you so much Mr. Shahar, for giving back our self worth to people with autism. It’s almost incredible how you have been able to put exactly into words how difficult it is for autistic people like myself (diagnosed with ASD at 57) to live in this what I call ‘upside down world’. I can only thrive among people who are authentic about their own emotions, since my antennas catch any incongruity in this respect, which instantly turns my brain into chaos.

[@danielmoore4024]

Gydjulind, Where you mention "authentic" connects to both a theory of mine and the father saying the nature is misunderstood. I've read about both autistic and nonautistic brains and authenticity is a characteristic. I've listened to lots of autistic people sharing their experiences and authenticity is a common factor. In the brain of people without autism that differs is "conformity", autistic people including myself really frown on people pretending to be someone they're not, nonautistic people have a fear of being different. I have another theory that Autism is a condition that affects personality, out of all the autistic people I've listened to there's more common character with personality. What if things like hypersensitivity is not a symptom of Autism, but a coping mechanism of a neurodiverse brain?

[@shadeedahmad6542]

The path to awareness is often a focus on empathy. This is a very interesting, practical, compassionate and empathetic approach to appreciating autism.

[@danielmoore4024]

Shadeed Ahmad, Reading facial expressions and someone's emotions is not to do with autism, this is just a false assumption. By an autistic individual having an alternative way to neurodevelop some parts of the brain function differently. Some people with autism have the part of the brain that helps recognise emotions is affected, difficulties reading emotions is a separate condition known as "emotional agnosia". Once technology advanced at the start of the 21st century neurologists came to see so much about autism before hand were flawed assumptions.

[@shadeedahmad6542]

@@danielmoore4024 With all due respect, I value your opinion as much as you value mine. Peace.

[@matthewtetley7048]

Yeah I learnt that recently and is going to be one of my focuses shortly outside of work

[@JasmineHoltze]

I have two young children who are Autistic and I thank you for this talk.

[@edwinhill413]

My child has improved full and acting up right with his social skill since taking dr Oyalo herbal remedy. He has no major signs of autism like he was since I got the herbs. Doc herbs work perfectly

[@TheTishy44]

My daughter is on the spectrum, and We were lucky, we lived in a area were they had early intervention and crazy support. She no longer needed a IEP in 10th grade. So she made the choice to stop. She graduates high school this year, and is accepted to college. She struggles in social interaction, so no friends since middle school. I hope that changes in college. Having a child with autism breaks your heart sometimes, since most people don’t see how awesome they really are. But know you are not alone and it’s getting so much better for people with autism out there.

[@valentinabestani3089]

Amazing parent. Amazing child. I wish the very best for your family!!!!!! Great talk !!!!!!

[@shilpahanda6637]

Much respect to you! Regards from India

[@cjudy1103]

Well said! After trying to understand and taking care of my autistic daughter for years, I can't help feeling the same. Why don't we change the world to a better place to deserve them!

[@nancynunke9783]

Why don't we just stop vaccinating chikdren which causes this.

[@heryzo-prdk]

indeed

[@jewelslove2200]

I CAN'T EXPRESS HOW BEAUTIFUL THIS TALK IS. THANK YOU MR GUY. YOU ARE A HERO FOR ALL AUTISTIC PEOPLE. THANK YOU FOR CHANGING THE NARRATIVE. THANK YOU FOR SEEING THE TRUTH. WHO DECIDES WHAT IS NORMAL AND WHAT IS DIFFERENT. FOR ALL I KNOW I FIND AUTISTIC PEOPLE MORE HUMAN, KIND, REAL AND LOVABLE THAN OTHERS.

[@ivanlimzg]

Thanks for being empathetic and personal to share this

[@britp480]

Love this. I work with kids with autism in a public school and this is bang on. Makes me think of the quote "it is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society". It's North American culture that's the issue, not the sensitivity of these kids. It's much easier to say that people have a disorder, rather than to change our culture. Our environments have a huge impact on us. I've seen it with my own eyes, kids being in classrooms that are not healthy for them and classrooms that are and they are completely different kids. It's amazing. Of course it's easier to blame the individual than to change a system that's not working for so many. To any parents of kids with autism who may be reading this: advocate for your child. Advocate for simple changes in the classroom and in the mindset of school staff that would have a lasting positive impact on your child. There are very simple things that can be done in classrooms that would be life changing for your kid. Be persistent with your school. On another note, I think the reason so many kids and teens struggle with depression and anxiety these days is also largely due to the environment. In order to curb the suicide epidemic, our society needs to change.

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@paskalletje]

What changes should I be considering? Could you give me some examples?

[@britp480]

In terms of classroom changes you can advocate for your kids?@@paskalletje

[@britp480]

@@paskalletje sometimes kids with autism just need consistent breaks from the classroom in order to feel regulated... And if they have that time to be in a quieter space they won't feel as overwhelmed and their emotional well-being will improve as well as their productivity in class. Classrooms can be an extremely chaotic place sometimes so if the child knows they can go to a quieter space like the office or library for a period of time (maybe just 15-20 mins) when they are feeling dysregulated, this can really help! Or perhaps this can be set up on a regular, daily basis, where the child knows it's in their schedule that each day at 10 am and 1 pm for example, they can go for a break. Also, classrooms where the teacher promotes a calm space through more minimal decor, a calm voice and a regular routine can be super helpful too! So either letting the teacher know that this would be very helpful for your child or advocating for your child with the principal that this is the type of teacher you would prefer for your child, if there's an option, can also be highly beneficial. Hope this was helpful!!

[@helixaether872]

As an autistic person with both headphones on I just sat through the “too much information” video and Jesus that felt awful.

[@jowilson5581]

yeah I really couldn't handle that part either lol. I had to take a minute afterwards

[@MyASDJourney]

This may be a older video but it the first time I 've seen it. It is so true what he is saying about how when we are so young, we're just trying to cope with basic mind and body regulation. Children who are autistic can be so traumatized by what appears to be the normal environmental and social situations. Guy explained this so well. I've tried to find the words to explain how those who are not autistic see the world in such a different way. It makes us feel like we don't belong here it seems so contrary to our perspective of life. This video explains such an important concept about autism, to understand.

[@conwaynewton]

As a High Functioning Austic person, I stand with this parent. My parents never once led me to believe that my struggles and obistcsls were concrete and eventually some of them would become great gifts. I feel proud and hopeful when people who are not on the spectrum start trying to change the view of Autism and have a view for the future where people will care for one another.

[@claudiusraphaelpaeth5689]

Someone started to see .. the sheer simplicity behind it. Yes, the "normal" world is a "warzone", in which people teach baby-people that bad is good, cold is hot ... so loud that most fail to realize that keeping quiet - even just a sec - is an absolute necessity. Thanks for sharing.

[@macribastos6810]

This is a way to explain autism in a graceful and very wise way. Thank you so much for sharing with us the experience with your son, shading light to a complex human behavior.

[@abigailmcewan]

I believe we as individuals and as a society are definitely the problem. We have a lot to learn from autism.

[@ahansaogren]

I just discovered this for myself at age 39 and am also in tears at how deeply perceptive this is at a time when almost no one in my immediate life (including myself! internalized ableism is a huge part of this issue) has been able to even come close to seeing this bigger picture. It is so essential that diagnosis is improved and everyday awareness is increased amongst the general population, and especially for afab/women who I now know often fly completely under the radar until much later in life because of the ways in which we are socialized into manners and deferring communication. I'm in the US and am struggling so much to even get access to diagnosis and (through that) to the help I need. I have put myself through so much in silence, and have suffered the consequences of failing over and over in public beneath the calm of a socially acceptable mask, to get to the point of functionality I managed to achieve in my life before it was swept away by the pandemic. Seeing this thinking in the world about who I actually am has been one of the only solid threads I've been able to hold onto in the midst of it all, and while it's been the most challenging thing I've had to it is truly transformative to see yourself reflected in a positive light. Thank you.

[@gaynorhennessy9954]

I'm.age 50 and recently diagnosed and this is me! Thank you ❤️it's so hard being so caring in this world .

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@limitlesslearning8039]

Just wondering why you need to get it diagnosed for Autiam at age of 50 ? I mean what difficulty u faced in ur life which force u to go for diagnosis ? As parent of autistic kid, it's a curious question. My son is 3.8 yrs old. He lacks response, social connections, poor eye contact, poor understanding, many repetitive activities, sudden meltdown, sometime self harm.

[@gaynorhennessy9954]

@@limitlesslearning8039 my son is also autistic ,he's 27 now and was diagnosed very young. Firstly I always had an idea I was ( there's a huge hereditary link) as I got older the struggle was different but no less .not being rude but people assume too much if our struggles aren't apparent straight away they aren't there but don't be fooled. Masking can cause horrendous burn out , as a young person I attempted suicide ,had eating disorder, had lots of other issues but masked and masked . In a burnout the doctor explained he felt an assessment would be beneficial so I went ,it was two years in the waiting list and three very thorough assessments . I'm a great believer in self help ,you can't get the appropriate help at times so I thought if I am I can learn more about it in women ( it can present differently) it was no surprise when it was a yes BUT it has helped me start to be kinder to and about myself ,to not feel a failed " normal person" to advocate and explain my needs a little more . It's a journey to try to get through life on my own side . I have gone through this long not liking myself , wondering why I do this or don't do that ,I've found my tribe now and I'm glad ,I don't feel so alone. I hope that explains

[@gaynorhennessy9954]

@@limitlesslearning8039 oh and no one forced me ,that's a very weird word to use 😕🤔

[@SecondChances06]

Wow this really hit me. Thank you for this it’s like actually being seen. Really brought me to tears. ❤

[@andrewskinner8560]

This describes my life.

[@PaulWady]

Profound sensitivity. Yes, simple as that. Very well done. This is great. Binary minded awareness. All or nothing engagement with everything.

[@trainersebastian361]

Oh my goodness, this guy is incredible, I've got goose bumps listening.

[@carmensadler8403]

This was the most beautiful and truest talk I've ever seen and heard. You are a beautiful person and Father who is so connected and understanding of his son and people with autism.

[@heryzo-prdk]

indeed. we need more of these

[@edwinhill413]

My child has improved full and acting up right with his social skill since taking dr Oyalo herbal remedy. He has no major signs of autism like he was since I got the herbs. Doc herbs work perfectly

[@chrisgates8891]

What a brilliant video and talk. I wish that there was more people like this in the world who are looking to change the world to understand us who are Autistic. I heard a brilliant line from another TED Talk, from an Autistic person which sums it up perfectly 'I am not disabled. The world I live in is disabled.'

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@heryzo-prdk]

from a father of an autist to another father of an autist: thank you for sharing. I love the positive approach you have (and share)..thank you do much

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@triciawoolfrey6803]

A sensitive and insightful look into autism and the two videos show both the reality of the autistic experience and the hope that is there.

[@brucewayne3074]

I'm holding on a rope, got me ten feet off the ground...and I'm hearing what you say, but I just can't make a sound...

[@staceyforbes7230]

Children's brain's change when you use relationship based therapies. This method sounds much like DIR/Floortime developed by Dr. Alan Greenspan. You focus on meeting the child's emotional needs while developing a trusting relationship with them.

[@seedplanter7173]

Vaccines and the smart phone are the elephant in the room. I wonder who owns big pharma and phone service?

[@basicpolygon5065]

@@seedplanter7173 ል̂ዪቿ̂ ሃ̈ዐ̀ሁ̄ ር̧ዐ̃ጠጎ̈ክ́ኗ ፕዐ̈ ዕል̊ ፕዪቿ̂🌳🌲

[@donnyrosart8714]

@@seedplanter7173 Just like elephants, they don't cause autism.

[@seedplanter7173]

@@donnyrosart8714 How do you know Elephants don't cause autism? Because you found out for yourself or because someone told you? Whatever you do don't look where they told you not to look. You can look everywhere else. When you can't figure it out blame it on heredity (mathematically impossible)

[@gabeangel8104]

Thank you. A couple of years ago I heard about the phenomenon of ‘naive creatures’, which is the technical term for an animal that has been moved to an environment (like a different country) that it is not evolved to thrive in. There is nothing wrong with this animal and it would thrive perfectly well in the environment it is suited for, but it will struggle to survive in the new place simply because conditions are very different from what it’s species has evolved to handle. Naive is one of the things people have always called me and I know this is not what they mean but I connect with this ‘naive creature’ idea when I heard the term because it was a way to hold onto a belief that I am not inherently broken and wrong. What you have said here does the same. You understand more than anyone I have ever heard before and it was so healing listening to your talk.

[@Meowymeowmeow]

I am in tears. Thank you so much Guy Shahar

[@angelab3617]

The purest of people

[@knowledgepower4808]

I view Autistic people as being born to give and experience love, and nothing but love, understanding, prosperity, and unity for all. We are the ones who are growing up with the wrong mindset, wrong view on life. Autism is a world of pure love. And that's what true family is.

[@nancynunke9783]

Really? Watch the videos of autistics on the other end of the scale and see how all suffer, the parents, siblings and the person with autism. The breakdown of love to frusttration, sadness, no where to turn, violence, divorce and yes, even hate, is what happens to most of the families going through this with an autistic child. Suicide is 9 times as high. It is neither normal nor beautiful.

[@juicyparsons]

my brother is autistic and a lot of our friends growing up were. I would be pretty upset if we didn't have our ASD family in society. of course there are disordered parts that make life uncomfortable and really trying at times but that's also true for all if us in ways. we can do our best to love each other and work with them and support them imo

[@edwinhill413]

I got the herbs from Dr Oyalo and use the remedy on my son as he instructed. As I speak my child is speaking well and his social skill has improved. It a good thing to tell this and his herbs is the best for autism kids than any therapy. Thanks

[@lisagarza7285]

I hope we can learn to live in openness for NT and ASD alike. Wonderful talk!

[@tm13tube]

This is a beautiful way to explain autism. My one thought is to consider Baby Sign. This is my personal observation as a grandmother of eight, one with autism and another borderline autism but never a diagnosis, did not talk until three, but strong sensory issues and anxiety.

[@emmarose4234]

Signing rocks!

[@margicates553]

There is no such thing as “ borderline autism “ there is a child that has been taught that there way of experiencing the world is wrong, and has abandoned themselves in favor of relationships. Otherwise known as masking.

[@davspa6]

I don't have the extreme aversion to sounds like you were talking about in the mall video,, but definitely have what you said about the concern for others. It bothers me greatly when I see people being selfish, like on the highway. I don't understand why people like reality shows, where you try to be deceptive. I have Asperger's, so not as severe maybe as your child, but I will try to think about my life the way you explained it here...

[@warriorprincessharmony]

It's more advanced species of human. It's not a disorder. The way NeuroTypicals expect people to be is totally maladaptive.

[@victoriagabriella1103]

Beautiful speech. He didn't miss a beat. Thank you for bringing awareness and what a great angle to take. Incredible sir. Keep it up.

[@jimmiller1334]

I believe you are right. I engage my nonverbal charge the way you describe, I see such improvements in self esteem and confidence.

[@paulomoura8487]

INCREDIBLE! I just didn't become autistic (I used to feel exactly like the shopping centre scene, but even worse) because of my life experience with A LOT of people demanding my attention (not saying it was good). I'm going to look for Guy to talk to

[@GorgoReptilicus]

Sir you speak magic. Thank you for this.

[@Satan666Official]

Aw, that boy is so adorable!

[@aneesmughal2949]

That short video made me cry 😭😭

[@nataliesirota2611]

This is none of the BEST explanations I have ever heard about autism and how we respond to the world!

[@edwinhill413]

I want to share about a herbal recommendations I got about Dr Oyalo on KZbin and his herbal remedy which work perfectly on my sons improvements and social skill till now. He now speakers in sentences, responds to name and instructions, no more aggressiveness and many more unlike him before

[@TiNoir123]

what a nice guy

[@aileenvargas8913]

He did a great job!

[@mistyb4987]

Great video. Your son is adorable

[@HappyHoney41]

Thank you so much for this.

[@XiaoliangZhao2014]

Thank you for bringing the awareness and understanding of autisim to others.

[@kimchiman1000]

This man has gained a lot of insight. It's like he can unde5dtand what it is like.

[@fairclothconcrete9125]

ABSOLUTLEY ENLIGHTENING !!

[@sebacea7839]

omg I'm crying...

[@lolavilardell03]

That was beautiful. I felt amazingly understood. Thank you!

[@Tom-mc9ts]

Wow this is so powerful

[@charlottefrank2677]

Thank you! Makes totally sense to me and matches to what i already thought before! 👍💞

[@slipa9]

Thank you. Thank you.

[@bob.ross330]

Thank you. That is all. Just thanks. ❤️

[@corsicanlulu]

amazing, thank you.

[@monicahernandez6607]

Very well put! Thank you so much for your words 💕

[@MootElm]

Thank you for such a special talk, your son is very lucky, God Bless

[@edwinhill413]

I want to share about a herbal recommendations I got about Dr Oyalo on KZbin and his herbal remedy which work perfectly on my sons improvements and social skill till now. He now speakers in sentences, responds to name and instructions, no more aggressiveness and many more unlike him before

[@shelbygale3270]

Wow. Truly powerful from a mom of a 3 year old who is every good thing ❤

[@edwinhill413]

I want to share about a herbal recommendations I got about Dr Oyalo on KZbin and his herbal remedy which work perfectly on my sons improvements and social skill till now. He now speakers in sentences, responds to name and instructions, no more aggressiveness and many more unlike him before

[@starlashao9347]

great mind and talk

[@Rem1Gnova]

This really is beautiful

[@canndydrivegaming9831]

Nothing is really silent every where is sound even water can use in so many different ways

[@brucolerba]

Great Absolutely Great Video ! ! ! ! Thank you for sharing this !!

[@arashazaad8458]

My daughter is 12.5 years old and has this condition but extremely shy extremely low social skills , she has never had a friend in school and there are times she cries from loneliness and that breaks my heart because I can’t do anything about it.

[@andymilstenmusic8520]

I’ve been there many times!! I’m a senior in high school this year, but last year I felt so unloved and I felt as if the whole school hated me and wanted me to die!! I absolutely hated myself. Continuously making threats against myself, contemplating suicide, self-deprecating, and everything!! I’m still like that, even though I don’t want to be!! I feel as if I don’t belong at all!! I don’t have all the things that other people my age have such as a drivers license (a goal I’ve been wanting to make sure I achieved before the end of my senior year for a long time now), a whole bunch of friends, or any of the main things most kids my age have!! Living like that and facing that reality is one of the hardest things ever. I still from time to time suffer from anxiety and depression and want to kill myself even though I know it’s not possible. I just want to say to a mother such as you, thank you for being an understanding soul and caring human being for us!!! Living with autism is not fun, but there are great things about it too. I don’t think I’d be the musician I am if I was a typical person!! I won the concerto competition with my youth orchestra on piano and performed it with the orchestra past November becoming one of my top achievements….Not everyone can do something like that (not to sound self-centered or anything), but it’s just a gift!! I would love to get over my autism and be a happier person, but it will take a lot of time and effort to get there!!! Thank you very much💕💕💕❤️❤️❤️💞💞💞

[@andymilstenmusic8520]

Here’s the link to my performance, hope you enjoy it!!

[@edwinhill413]

My child has improved full and acting up right with his social skill since taking dr Oyalo herbal remedy. He has no major signs of autism like he was since I got the herbs. Doc herbs work perfectly