Removing Negative Self Talk | Abria Joseph | TEDxYouth@NIST

[@femininefeline2659]

"If you have voices in your mind that say you cannot paint, by all means paint and that voice will be silenced." That brought me to tears.

[@Malitubee]

Loved it

[@Love-sr3nk]

This video moved me to tears. Why am I so down on myself? Why are we our worst critics? Why do we care what others think or say? Especially when it comes to our passion and dreams. Thank you for sharing this video with the world. I send my love, respect, and joy to you all! 1♡

[@bronxlords]

HeatherG 3003. Looking at you makes me peaceful Heather.

[@RaingamLuikham]

Its 2019. Any improvements on your thought process?

[@GudduKumar-hr9kk]

@@bronxlords gd00

[@mikeythomas1681]

To Suzy well said, you are right on point.

[@sarangkim6373]

A logical approach is actually meaningless, especially when you feel anxiety. search youtube 'paradox of I can do it'...

[@PhysicalMath]

I pump so much positivity into my mind every day through listening to motivational videos that there is no time let for negativity. The words we hear, especially the ones we hear repeatedly, whether from others, or ourselves, can absolutely make or break us in life.

[@rva]

calculuscoaches awesome outlook

[@erickaz3787]

Really believe this too

[@FahadAyoub]

If you are on social media and you share your positive thoughts 💭 and share your positive videos... Can i join the circle? I'm desperate to have someone positive in my life other than myself Thanks either ways and good luck 🍀 🐰 +1

[@derrickagonzales]

Yes!

[@axeld.santacruz4659]

Are you equal to minus 1?

[@lessonsin30s]

Hard to be positive when you're surrounded by toxic people and can't leave because you have nowhere to go.

[@vishaloc8092]

💯

[@alanamurray422]

Right. Time to make a plan.

[@iamzulkaif]

The number of pauses he took in his entire presentation were not unintentional. He did it deliberately which made his whole speech calm, composed, and collected. Easy to digest and easy to understand. Smooth like I am floating and water is slowly gliding over me.

[@improvewithsoo-selfdevelop1219]

What an amazing talk. Just want to share the great takeaways I got from this: -Our mind is like an instrument. It has its thoughts and can be tuned. -Shift negative voice and stories to positive ones. -A lot of people won't believe in your dreams even maybe close family and friends - "Wow, that's a great idea but here's a long list of why that won't work." Three questions to ask: 1) Is it the truth? 2) Is it necessary? 3) Does is improve upon the silence? -Subconscious and unconscious mind don't know the difference between negative or positive energy. -Question the stories in your mind. -Live your dream!! -Just acknowledge the thoughts that appear like clouds in the sky.

[@jananathbanuka4994]

What does "Does is improve upon the silence? " mean?

[@nicolejttmom6061]

Excellent summary♥️.

[@mdz1009]

Thank you very much 👍🏼!! You just saved me a lot of time going back over his talk 😁!

[@norrainebaby]

If you're reading this, Smile because you owe yourself that much love ! 🤷🏽‍♀️😊

[@pateastwood]

you got that right sugar

[@ervingpena3538]

Norraine wow. Who would of thought I needed to read that

[@aliceworthy7130]

Nice, I receive that. A word in due season.

[@cinnamonrolls6027]

☺️thx

[@BlindassassinMGTOW]

It can actually change your immune system.

[@anukhati3706]

who else is on a "TED X" marathon?

[@rva]

anu khati always

[@RebeccahKahn]

for days!

[@natacouture]

always!!!!!

[@lilithrogers1]

MEEEEE TOO!!!

[@haneesk53]

anu khati lol me rnn

[@yodelissosa7791]

14mins. + Vincent Van Gogh said: " If you have voices in your mind that say that you cannot paint, by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced. "

[@CS-pl1re]

i loved what he said about the fact that you dont have to believe any. you can agree with that person at the moment, but in your mind you can be aware and stop that thought! if u can controle yourself and put away those voices your become your own hero!

[@dhanaissimo]

Shift the negative self-talk and stories into positive ones (8:04) question yourself 3 main questions: 1. Is it the truth? Is whatever I'm sharing with someone or what you are hearing from someone thats giving you feedback about your life; true? 2. Is it necessary? Is what I'm saying to myself in my head, is necessary in the exact moment in what I'm doing with my life right then 3. Does it improve upon the silence?

[@nourkhedri8228]

What does it mean does it improuve upon the silence

[@sunshinenOJ]

@@nourkhedri8228 Is what someone said, better than just if they sat in silence? Like if they said, "I hate ...", then if people feel bad as a result of hearing it, then it would have been better if they had just sat in silence.

[@sunshinenOJ]

12 step programs use question 1 and 2 and instead of his 3, they use "Is it kind?" They use that as a test as to whether to say what you're thinking of saying.

[@jacobstevenson6180]

Like mom always used to say "if you dont have anything good to say then dont say anything."

[@underdogunchained]

That music is so soothing.

[@zeehuss7275]

5llllle Its lovely music

[@tylertyler82]

I find it energizing and mesmerizing

[@tamara3782]

One of my students told me that when he discussed his anxieties with someone close to him, like his wife or a close friend, then he found that the moment he started opening up to them, the anxiety decreased-even before he received any advice or support. Togetherness definitely decreases anxiety. There is a saying in the wisdom of Kabbalah that “a sorrow shared is a sorrow halved,” i.e. when we share a sensation, we divide it up, and in turn it becomes more manageable. Since it is quite easy to see how sharing our experiences lessens our negative feelings, the question is why do we not use this ability more? Why is it so hard for us to share our fears and anxieties with others? We are indeed afraid of opening our hearts, letting everyone see that we have certain fears and anxieties. That is, in addition to whatever fears and anxieties we hold within, we usually have additional anxieties about sharing them with others, that it might cause others to perceive us as weak. Since society in general values stronger, smarter, wealthier and fitter individuals, opening up our anxieties to such a society makes us vulnerable to exploitation. We thus need to seek a social environment that would not exploit us for opening up, but would rather give us a sense of faith and confidence that it can help us cope with any negative feelings. A social setting that can guarantee faith and confidence in its members is one that actively draws itself to the upper good and benevolent force-the force of love, bestowal and connection. It is this very same force that awakens negative feelings in us, whether they be fears, anxieties or several other painful sensations, in order for us to draw closer to that force, and we do so by drawing closer to each other. If we wish to connect with the upper force and let its perfect quality of love, bestowal and connection fill our lives with a sensation of faith and confidence, then we need to emulate such a quality toward other people-giving them a sense of faith and confidence, and for them to do the same toward us. By wanting to positively connect with others, we then start awakening the positive force dwelling in nature into the connections we create, and we then feel a new sense of faith and confidence wash away any anxieties that we might be holding within.

[@ms_smorris5750]

I was instantly drawn to the music and told myself - just listen, don't think. It's as if the music made me become more aware of my thoughts and invited me into meditation. Kind of spooky to continue listening to the talk and learn he had that same experience, is a yoga/meditation teacher and is from where I grew up. So glad to have stumbled upon this talk!

[@sandydhillon115]

This is the first ted talk that has ever made an impact on me. Thank you Abria Joseph. I'm grateful

[@chestiancrowley5999]

Sandy Dhillon... Wow you are truly gorgeous!! That's all.

[@vikneshmaniam5618]

@@chestiancrowley5999 simp

[@SuperSecundos]

Problem with me is that I know that those thoughts are not true, necessary etc. But they still come back 2-3 seconds later.

[@atester42]

You need to respond to those thoughts in your head and say, "No that's not right" and such. You will weaken their strength.

[@TheHardestCombatter]

don't resist, just observe the thoughts :)

[@WieseCoaching]

Thats okay, don't judge yourself for it. And don't take on more than you can. Just stop the thoughts for as long as you can and replace them with positive thoughts. If you can stop them for only 5 seconds for now, thats okay. Maybe tomorrow its 10 seconds. Always remember long term consistency beats short term intensity. So work on this every day and only focus on positive thoughts. Disclaimer: while you should "stop" thinking negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones, you should never "stop" feeling or suppressing negative emotions. If negative emotions are attached, feel them, observe them, just let them come up and don't judge yourself for them. If you do this they will be gone eventually.

[@s.aura.h8084]

Be kind to yourself, forgive yourself. The habits of a lifetime can take a while to change. Mindfulness and self love is a practise, the more time you give it the clearer things will become

[@ScottSwalwell]

I allow the thoughts to come and then write them down so I have alist of the negative thoughts. I then write out the positive replacements and affirm them all the time. This eventually will overpower them

[@wingsumlo7170]

I have been searching my whole life how to stop the negative talk. This really helps

[@pamg9405]

What an AMAZING talk. I struggle w/depression & this talk is so pertinent to where I am. That instrument is Fabulous!! Thanks so much for sharing

[@simpletrading20]

Think about nice things every single day, have something to learn, eliminate negative self talk in your mind. This speech actually impact me, i will change

[@btappin12]

My daughter's name is Abria 🥰15 years ago, I thought I created that name just for her. I even gave it my own meaning, 'Sunshine'! She grew up curious about her name and only found a corporation with the same name. She will be pleased to know someone else shares her name!

[@pavasite4278]

Him playing that instrument actually brought joy to me and happiness. Just something about the noise that’s beautiful and improves my mood

[@ScottSwalwell]

We all need to talk to ourselves with as much love, support and encouragement as we do to our loved ones. Do this and you will be happier, achieve more success and be a much more effective person

[@yodelissosa7791]

What if our loved ones don't give us any?? What if they're the reason we treat ourselves the same?? Because it's the onmy thing we know of?? They give no positivity or appreciation so how can I know how to do that to myself when I no none??

[@dianeibsen5994]

Beautiful. Beautiful sound of the instrument and you kindness. Thank you for being me peace today.

[@NewOldObsession]

3 questions to ask yourself about your inner dialogue or what others say about you/your dreams: 1. is it true? 2. is it necessary to think this in this exact moment? 3. does it improve the silence? you don't have to believe other people because they have different experiences, beliefs, values, ideas, etc.

[@thepochade5992]

I had the very same experience when I first heard the hung drum back in 2010. I was wondering through a very large market when I heard a sound that was so familiar but i didn't know what it was. I was drawn as if on a fishing line weaving in and out of the crowds. I rounded a corner and there sat a man playing this amazing instrument. As I got closer to him everyone else peeled away and I was left transfixed and alone with him in the space of the music. He stopped playing and looked up at me when without thought or conscious mind, the words " That isn't from this planet" shot out of my mouth. Without a blink of the eye or hesitation he replied " That's right, have you heard of Pleiades ?" I stood there shocked at what I'd said but had a deep knowing, it felt very true. I knew within, that I had felt those sounds before ❤

[@racqueltarlit-alejolpt2154]

Watching from Mozambique, Africa... my son James and I are watching this video enjoyably. The musical instrument is wonderful and the speaker is brilliant. We need to stay optimistic.

[@WieseCoaching]

Great talk. It's so important to realise that your negative thoughts are not real most of the time and often just projecting into the future. If you want to quit these thoughts you have to first identify them. Pay attention to your thinking, to your mind for a few days and write down all of your negative thought patterns. Now you know what to pay attention to and if the negative thoughts kick you can stop them. And then replace them with positive thoughts. For example if you think "I will fail anyway" stop that and replace it with "it will be a total success". Also start focusing on positive things and on the positive in everything instead of negative things. The key as in everything is long term consistency. Don't expect to change your whole thinking in one week. It will take a while but pay attention to your mind on a daily basis and eventually your thinking will shift and you will start to attract more positivity into your life.

[@ScottSwalwell]

Well put. I also add to this process a upload of the new replaced positive thoughts daily. I make it a habit so I'm feeding my mind what I want

[@simrangupta4666]

I could relate to what he said and was already about to give the video a thumbs up, later he called Sai Baba his Guru, n thn ended with a namaste n now I cannot resist commenting! Love from India.

[@rachnap4564]

This sound played on this instrument is so soothing. It is so important to remove the negative self talk that keeps on going in our heads. Very nice!

[@annie_ma13]

I really enjoyed his parallel with an instrument and our inner voices…

[@jorguzman3490]

The problem with me is i come straight to the comments

[@Seeker0fTruth]

jorge guzman SAME! 🤦‍♀️

[@esk8jaimes]

Same here.

[@frustratedchild]

couldn't blame u

[@freakyboy742]

Bursting laughing out loud

[@deerbeats9379]

This is EXACTLY what I was supposed to hear at this time.

[@geraldfrank1630]

Complaining is the #1 addiction in the world. It destroys everything. 99% of it is unconscious, which keeps it going ad infinitum until you make them conscious by paying attention to them. Like magic they disappear until you have freed yourself from your own mental prison that you learned from all the complaint addicts before you. All it takes is a commitment to focus for true freedom! Nothing better. 👊👌🙏👍

[@rva]

This was brilliant. Thank you

[@abelardosandoval6671]

6

[@abriajoseph9710]

Aloha Rebecca thank you 🙏🏽

[@Thrustlift]

@@abriajoseph9710 that’s uesful abria. Thanks

[@abriajoseph9710]

@@Thrustlift blessings for exploring practices to go within🙏🏽

[@1fren363]

Go ahead and skip to 8:04

[@devanshigulati3487]

thanku

[@ChequeWriter]

Hunter Sheffield cheers

[@SCooldudeS]

You are a hero

[@DeadlyV1RU5]

You da real MVP :')

[@aminaleila836]

You're dope!

[@norcalirishman9413]

Wow I haven’t related to anything more than this as of late. I feel this guy is really trying to share his experiences to help others with zero malevolence. I just jotted his name down because I know this is what I should be teaching myself. Thank you sir 🙏💪

[@barbaragould500]

WHEN I WOKE UP THIS MORNING I THOUGHT TO MY MIND.."MIND I WANT YOU TO SERVD ME LOVE...SERVE ME FAITH..SERVE ME A GREAT DAY...AND WALA-NO DARK THOUGHTS "-🙂

[@InSync3912]

Best ted talk ive seen so far! with not just empty, 'go-get it! words, but with clear and concise guide, with sound even...beautiful one

[@jeremymejia323]

Very-Powerful..I came across this video and it inspired me to question all the negative thoughts that scrambles my head from time to time. #peace #blessedup

[@lousypoetry4207]

Dear Abria Joseph, Thank you for this talk and your hang playing. Beautiful sound, beautiful mind. Now both made my mind silent, pure joy.

[@LourdesAB]

His approach is essentially the Work of Byron Katie, The Four agreements of Manuel Ruiz, and others. He has has a very clear and well paced explanation of what affects our experiences, our living.

[@janeygregory7112]

Beautiful music, beautiful mind! I was lifted to a higher place. Thank you.

[@leahpash2906]

What I have found helps to change negative thoughts is movement, start to walk with your body and shift the energy in your body creating these thoughts, change your posture, move more gently with your body, you will surprised what a difference this makes.

[@Hannabananacanas]

Live your best life doing what you love ; be passionate in everything and silence anyone voice who tries to change it ; keep the positivity 🔥👌🏽

[@nachofroyo6493]

Manifesting everything good after i watch this video. Thanks for this talk.

[@rashmigawade2011]

That was gooood!♥️🌹♥️.....And mention of Sai Baba in the end the sweetest surprise.🙂👍💕💕💕

[@kailashsingha4073]

wow the musical instrument is so soothing! music can really heal people!

[@nanadee106]

"Does it improve upon the silence?" Gonna need to hold onto that one...

[@brittripudio]

Im filled with doubts, negativity and anxious about life and success Achievements and accomplishments So i came here despite all my cynicism. Hoping this will destroy my negativity

[@nicolejttmom6061]

Sound changes the geometric patterns in the energy around you. Happy New Year😻🥳!

[@fivebigideas9553]

I'm inspired by how Abria seems like a very grounded person, and I found his talk about removing negative self talk inspiring! Thanks for sharing :)

[@bhushandhatingan8384]

Josef sir I am from Nasik Maharashtra India near to Shirdi By watching &lisning to your video I notice that it is really really very much informative & useful. Lots of thanks for a useful wonderful & informative Tedx talk.

[@novalynnleilashea]

That was beautiful. I love that sound. He's so soothing.

[@saikiran1967]

I judged myself about those negative thoughts and always tried to give an explanation for them like this all my happiness gone and I went into depression

[@s.aura.h8084]

Wow one of the best ted talks I’ve listened to. Namaste!

[@badbytch1756]

I was about to shut KZbin off cause I fed my mind enough to get unstuck but this video played and you're playing that drum piano thing. I love that sound and first time i saw one was on the cruise ship in Mexico where I won a major lip sync battle. Guess this is destiny cause now I can't turn this video off. Hand Pan. Love it

[@badbytch1756]

Omg I got the picture of if. I was so fascinated watching the musician play it. I have chills all over again.

[@KH-tx6lg]

An 18 minute talk that boils down to "you don't have to believe your own negative thoughts"

[@advotecacy]

I love the Vincent van Gogh reference and the suggestion of self connection. Great video!

[@aswincmohan1926]

pause 4 8 get lost

[@theconciousentreprenure]

Aswin C Mohan why?

[@rva]

Simply me beautiful

[@judybritton8134]

Ady P the

[@leahpash2906]

Thoughts are only energy entering our body, the more we make movements that attract these thoughts, the more we will believe we are them. Start to move in a different way with presence, and it will make a difference.

[@АнастасияКулагина-ш3у]

His voice and accent OMG! I like the way he talk

[@mugonin593139]

Wow, I couldn't believe it. I found myself actually dancing. I love this video, and thanks.

[@ScottSwalwell]

Such a powerful video

[@jerrywestin3447]

I am 61 and very stubborn & hardheaded! Good luck on this brain!

[@jeaninelanza981]

Is what negative emotion or thoughts we are thinking about true? NO! We must believe that we can achieve anything and reach our goals. I have faith in all of you

[@markhammond2532]

Any TED Talk that starts of withal kettle drum, I'm so up for that! I wish more positive Ted Talks started with kettle drums! X.

[@markhammond2532]

Ps I cracked my nose bridge and ears earlier, and it made me happy :)

[@wellbodisalone]

One of the very first steps to take is to be aware of the moments when you have that negative self-talk. Notice when that happens and write it in a journal. And one way to try to start changing things is by surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people who can lift you up and help you feel good about yourself.

[@almaarmenta2995]

I just love how to sound that instrument.

[@RameshKandikonda]

Great story. First time, I have observed one Westerner recognizing India / Indian origin and learning.

[@weili1963]

Once I start to believe you, that can shift the whole chemistry in my mind (bonded or connected)

[@MichaelAlexander1967]

Wow. That was an incredibly catchy & funky piece!!! That's a club beat that invokes an incredibly spiritual feeling. Dude!

[@scorpion777silvermoon3]

I didn't know you could play a spaceship as a musical instrument. That is amazing. OKAY joking..but wow that's really nice

[@pso777atlantika]

Its called a 'hang drum'. KZbin it and you'll find some great music and street jams with it. :D

[@cornelialewis5909]

scorpio777 scorpio777 abdee biracialcuple

[@behlulqedir9280]

pso777atlantika the UK

[@thinkingaloud6957]

oooh I want one...it is amazing

[@rimafatima8634]

scorpio777 scorpio777

[@juliaskagfjord6207]

I was irritated I could barely find my comment so I am posting it at the top now. Lately I am choosing to be far more conscious of how I spend my mental energy and what I focus on each day. I came across the info that you just focus on positive words, or positive affirmations, and basically it will eventually replace the negative thoughts. Yes you are right you cannot push it away, pushing away and grasping are both two sides of the same coin...it is holding energy or (possibly creating some sort of karmic rebound energy) as opposed to the releasing of energy so it can flow through you. We human's know a lot intuitively already. Just a matter of opening up to our own hearts, and following the truth there in in a devoted way.

[@margieacarrell1687]

Soooooo soooooothing....I could listen to that allllllll day!!!! Love it!!

[@Shawn-jg2ul]

This is one of the best I can ever said really is awesome compared to many TED talks i had viewed and seen

[@hasancanozturk5408]

Teşekkürler. Harika bir konuşmaydı, bakış açımızı değiştirdiniz :)

[@mariaraines5145]

Incredible and powerful questions- thank you for this life changing presentation! I felt the same way when I first heard the hung being played on Saltspring Island- but sadly did not pursue it, and today is the first reminder that I have had of the otherworldly feelings it generates for me- thank you so much for that!❤️🙏

[@hetalsumara0805]

It was amazing... Andrea you have shared really very useful and necessary information to the world.. I am really very thankful to you.. and you play hyung very well ..👏👏👏👏👏

[@anthonyramirez2576]

Do what you gotta do, add ingredients and slow cook like grandmas stew, question the voices make good choices. Find passion and live it. Mo Betta

[@mistycelt1100]

Your hair and talk is lovely! Felt Peace.

[@anjalirai5984]

this was awsome...made me feel very good when i was feeling low...🙏

[@lu8201]

Soothing steel drum 💛🙌🏽

[@LovingAtlanta]

👍 Beautiful talk. Beautiful person. Thank you. 💞

[@samarhattar9569]

Abria!!! I just discovered this! I didn’t you know did this amazing talk. LOVED IT!!! 💕🙏

[@teetime9361]

Very profound speech...I thoroughly enjoyed it!!!

[@ginabonina6427]

Wonderful words of wisdom from a young sage. More please.

[@vicki1540]

Interesting talk. I love that musical instrument. Thank you

[@maddmaxx9077]

This is amazing! WOW! ♥️♥️♥️so grateful I made it to this video..🙌🏽

[@biaedwards4025]

Excellent, deeply simple.The three questions are so helpful

[@amituniyal3412]

The hardest walk is walking alone it also makes you strongest... go on

[@danimoura8402]

In my case when people doubt I can do something I use this as fuel to prove them wrong. But maybe because I am aware that most people project their own limitations on others. They don’t want you to take risks and eventually succeed because they know they can’t do themselves.

[@leahperrson3067]

As much I want to stop self hatred and negativity I just cant stop. I grew up with it.its second nature. Automatic. I feel like drowning almost every day.

[@BessieKaine]

17:41 Is what we speak the truth Is it necessary Does it improve upon the silence ~ Adapted from Sathya Sai Baba

[@noirdecat2286]

The tone of his voice is charming 😍

[@nicoco4974]

My favuorite ted talk so far. I watch this often. Thank you

[@sandrabates6919]

Thank you, I needed to get out of my own head today. Words of wisdom, my friend!

[@lavenderblue4093]

Nice talk, and that music is beautiful. I wouldn't necessarily associate this with negative thoughts in my mind though; I think this is more suited towards "How to take criticism."

[@na8730]

it's very similar in design also to a steel pan with its hollows and material just turned outward so it can be played with the hands while the steel pan useds playing sticks

[@thefam3079]

Our Mind Can Be Our Greatest Weapons Or Worse Enemy, It's Our Mental Choices That Decides That 💞 We Have Been So Normalized To War And Violence We Corrupt Our Conscious & Sub-Conscious By Putting Them At War Instead Of Letting Them Lead Us Positively

[@thebeautyandfood1719]

Amazing speech and music!!!!!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[@afroking9716]

i want one of these..wow.. beautiful sound.

[@rajeshkumarsingh4462]

very motivational & Powerful. ..