Terminator: Dark Fate rant, breakdown and review with Jay, Metal, SmilerAl and JLongBone

[@habes1486]

Retconning established characters to be unlikable while propping up new characters. Where have we seen that before?

[@SilvrSavior]

"YoU jUsT hAtE wOmEn!!1!1!1 YaS qUeEn SlAy"

[@vashviper9346]

The Room?

[@lieutenantnomad9198]

Terminator Genysis

[@FaithfulofUltramar]

Batwhammmmennnnnn

[@regiman222]

@@lieutenantnomad9198 that didn't have new characters to prop up besides 11th Doctor Skynet, everyone else was an established character. They did get retconed to fuck, I'll agree to that

[@screenwolf]

Not only have they crapped on T1 and T2 (and all the Terminators they retconned of course) by killing off John Connor at the start they've also basically created a rule that the AI always wins. There is no reason why Legion wouldn't do what Skynet did and have back up Terminators sent in time to kill off the new saviour. So not only have they made all the previous Terminator movies pointless they just made their own movie and all future movies pointless too. ... and that is how you kill off a franchise. FFS.

[@Umbra_Ursus]

Alien, Predator, Robocop, Star Wars, Nightmare on Elm Street, and now Terminator once again... (Sigh). It's sad that we can't just have nice things.

[@darthsolo8291]

This is intentional. They are burning the old franchises to the ground and in doing so they are making room for new woke levels.

[@RanMouri82]

@@darthsolo8291 Seems they're making sequels nobody asked for to lure the fan base, and then adding wokeness to lure the SJWs, hoping this makes them money and brownie points.

[@feIIas]

One of the things that JC said about Skynet in the Terminator Vault was that skynet felt guilty about what it had done and manipulated the entire events of the future war in order to erase itself from existence. So it actually makes sense for skynet to intentionally not use its whole power to destroy humanity in the past. Even in Terminator: Salvation, it makes sense as to why its created things like the harvesters to capture humans so that t can create the skin needed to destroy itself in the past. I guess they just forgot that and/or didn’t care when making the new series.

[@amanibob1416]

It's sh*t storytelling and the "grandfather paradox" conundrum mixed into one. T1 and T2 made 0 sense in a "let's do science right" way, but it was versimilitude, (maybe I'm schpelling it wrong), that kept it coerent "enough", at least for mine and most people's taste(s). The big robot is sent instantly and there's a delay between the 3 possible "timeline "rectified" endings: 1: it's nonsensical arrival (lol), contrivances, meaning something/someone change something without a butterfly effect erasing the very chance of the incentive for a time-change to be inplemented. 2: Good side get the good ending because nothing is changed that would erase the victory, yet also with the Judgement day being a part of this future, making the *real* timeline a crappy but still viable option for mankind to get. 3: Robot kill ze Connor(s) and that change anything up to the war being lost by the hoomans, yet without the *real* future being a future that isn't the "nukes went kaboom" option. In T2, the future was just fawked sideway and the war was fought without any SkyRey being god-modded, so there's no certainty that the future will be a good un', but the Terminator(s) aren't allowed to be sent back and Sky-Rey isn't given a chance to exist. Dark Fate? 1, 2 and 3 all into one. Robots that aren't built/sent by Sky-Rey. TerminArnold(s) still popping up everywhere, (sent simultaneously with different spawning times for maximum Arrival tism. Finally, Sky-Rey is basically switched for another, like a soda war between: "Qoca Cole" and "Pespi". That's just fawking silly, but that's what happens.

[@Whoknowsuknow]

There's no point in a female reboot of a movie franchise whose central character was a woman. Sarah Connor is the narrator and has the best arc of the first two films.

[@Ramsey276one]

AND THEY SOMEHOW DIDN'T REALIZE THAT!!!

[@oddballskull1941]

Like an all female alien movie?

[@cutemute76]

Exactly right, and this just ruins a whole lot because in reality it’s supposed to be about John and his destiny to lead humanity against the machines and they decide to replace him with this girl. John was told basically day one what his destiny was and Sarah even prepared him for that day until she was taken away from him but John never really forgot his mother’s teachings. And this girl, she just had her whole world turned upside down with all of this crap and we’re expected to believe that she’s the next symbol of hope humanity has?

[@jedibrooks7235]

Perfect point

[@stopthephilosophicalzombie9017]

@@cutemute76 Also it suggests that at any one time there's only one person that can rise into a savior role which is insane on its own.

[@liquidladdy]

As someone who has never invested their time into Terminator my sides were exploding when hearing the """""plot""""" of this cinematic circumcision. You have my condolences Terminator fans.

[@inigmianstudios2771]

Thank you. These are hard times for us T fans. We have to share a spot under the bridge with the Alien fans and the Predator fans

[@liquidladdy]

@@inigmianstudios2771 Oh god, at least you are in good company.

[@mantha6912]

"Cinematic circumcision" . The fact alone that we have to resort to describing films nowadays as stuff like...THAT, should be a painfully large indicator to these producers and directors (and hacks) that they're writing and filming some unbelievably bad shit.

[@agentcarter2219]

Yes they basically did a retroactive abortion of the 2 first and superior films

[@silvergrove8517]

@@mantha6912 well, they clearly don't care about that lol

[@christopherbarker1048]

Wow by killing John Connor, James Cameron took the most important character and made him disposable. Rendering the first 2 films utterly POINTLESS! James Cameron KILLED! Terminator.

[@beardedbjorn5520]

He killed Ripley too.

[@properduction2586]

@@beardedbjorn5520 John Conner was always the Title Character even when he was not on screen like in T-1... Humans and Machines fought till their last breath for his Survival... Sarah would probably be dead if it wasnt Kyle Reese close connection to her Son and Kyle's affection for her... And now you are telling me that all of that was for NOTHING ? Just to include a Mexican Chick ? The 2nd Terminator Film is a Classic MasterPiece with Memorable One-Liners,Great Acting,Great Characters,Great Action ... And the list goes on...Alien,Predator,Terminator,Star Wars,RoboCop,GhostBusters are fucked Franchises nowadays...

[@beardedbjorn5520]

@@Nomolyx1 I was talking about Alien 3 & 4. But now I think of it, I don't think he was actually involved with the production on them.

[@beardedbjorn5520]

@@Nomolyx1 I wonder why she came back for Resurrection? I recently bought the Alien boxset, and just can't bring myself to watch 4 hahaha

[@SolarDragon007]

@@Nomolyx1 I've heard the show was actually good.

[@wcw2793]

“Terminator Dark Fate is about some diabetic lesbian being more powerful than a robotic bodybuilder.” That needs to be in GDELB. 😂

[@amanibob1416]

wcw2793 "Because knowing is half the battle." Bigideas

[@Thunder_Bird0]

wcw2793 *LMAO*

[@LieutenantSilver]

That line is so good and it reminded me of something important: *Hollywood writers are mostly NPCs.* Their response to criticism of their protagonists being shallow Mary-Sues is to make their ladies more vulnerable. By giving them a stamina bar. Are you for real??

[@atomicdancer]

"Terminator: Damp Fart" (2019) is the greatest Terminator movie since "Terminator: Gynocologyst" (2015)

[@aTalkingKoala8294]

I agree

[@outriderjuno9371]

I concur

[@herrikudo]

Whats truly depressing about 2015 Terminator: you can see the potentially good movie that was there... but got edited to absolute SHIT. Plot points that go nowhere, jumps that make ZERO sense with nothing to show a jump in time other than change in light... movie blows

[@USMValor-jc5xu]

herrikudo even Salvation had the potential to be a great movie too.

[@zeeteepippi275]

Don't forget "The Sperminator" or "TerminaTOR: The Dark World"

[@casbyness]

Sarah saying "I'll be back" is so odd. That line isn't a Terminator thing, it's an Arnold thing. It's Armie's meta-line that effectively breaks the fourth wall, standing as his acting 'signature' across his movie appearances. It's not a character or movie line, it's more like the Wilhelm scream than a franchise trope. Sarah might as well have said "Here's Johnny!", it would have made about as much sense.

[@MikeTall88]

It was an Terminator thing 5hst Arnold took with him and it became a reference. Don't put the cart before the horse.

[@casbyness]

​ MikeTall88 He said it first in The Terminator, but when he did that it wasn't a thing at all. The only reason it was notable in that movie was because Arnold struggled a lot with delivering the line (due to his accent and imperfect command of English at the time) and asked it to be changed. Arnold then moved on from that movie and adopted the line as his acting catchphrase. Giving the line to Sarah is effectively giving it to Linda Hamilton, since it's a meta thing that has recognition because of what Arnold did with it outside the franchise, not a movie thing.

[@darthsonic4135]

@@casbyness Dude, the film is bad enough that you don't have to go digging for straws. Most consider "I'll be back" as a Terminator thing first, and an Arnie thing second.

[@jonskinner5664]

Then most are wrong, Arnold said it in at least 8 movies that I can think of, he absolutely made it his 'thing'.

[@Belzediel]

@@jonskinner5664 I concur. The Terminator line is 'Come with me if you want to live.' No question.

[@Lieutenant_Dude]

So I’m summary, dark fate literally kills off John so they can literally replace him with a girl. Nothing else of significance happens.

[@neropunkt]

hi summary, i'm dad

[@neropunkt]

but yes

[@samarium1934]

@@neropunkt top tier joke 👌

[@neropunkt]

@@samarium1934 you know it. only top quality jokes from me

[@TheSlammurai]

@@neropunkt I'm glad he never changed it. Otherwise people would be lost by the joke.

[@TyrDrum]

1:49:42 - Wait, Arnold terminator saves a wife/girlfriend from an abusive relationship and then raises the son? *Lol, that's a Robot Chicken skit.*

[@dragonknightleader1]

Drunk T-800 was best T-800. "I am DRUNK!"

[@SteveSmith-ty8ko]

Jesus Christ, it literally is!

[@MatheusSM1000]

Funny thing is, I started seeing piece after piece saying how amazing this movie was. Like, not on KZbin, but on "entertainment websites". It was then that I became sure that this movie wasn't very good lol

[@pezdispencer113]

General rule of thumb nowadays is: if critics say movie/show/game is bad, then it's really good. If they say it's good then it's really fuckin terrible.

[@321cheeseman]

@@pezdispencer113 How exactly did we reach this point?

[@sammydray5919]

@@321cheeseman Because "critics" now value agenda over integrity

[@pezdispencer113]

@@sammydray5919 some critics, not all. Places like IGN will value money over integrity instead.

[@Soridan]

It was a mistake letting bloggers rename themselves as "journalists" and "critics".

[@Shockguey]

HAHAHAHA IT WAS WORSE THAN GENISYS HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE

[@RogueFox2185]

Leave it to Hollywood hacks on finding a way to one up themselves on making garbage and calling it a masterpiece.

[@silvergrove8517]

The fact that they were so smug about erasing the "shit" movies out of the continuity and being the continuation of the good ones is really disturbing when you see the end product...

[@dragonknightleader1]

My brain literally can't comprehend that level of shit.

[@AL-ud2is]

because Dark Fate has no good redeeming parts in the whole film, but while Genisys isn't very good the young/old arnie fighting scene was quite cool and Emilia Clarke was quite nice to look at imo of course

[@feIIas]

"Life, uh... finds a way." - jurassic park man

[@chazfu]

"Old woman yells at toaster" the movie.

[@chazfu]

As much as Alien 3 was a disappointment, at least Ripley is dead canonically, and can't be destroyed like Luke, and now Sarah Conner have been. Ripley died a hero, and that can't be taken away from her.

[@M0ndi]

@@chazfu They'll find a way.

[@Aredein]

@@chazfu I admit it as alternative story continuation. Although, I want different sequel to aliens where Newt,Hicks and Ripley are alive. But movie actor's appearance and performance is so rooted to very movie characters, I can't imagine any new Actress who would play Ripley with similar appearance and performance.

[@peposo7]

''Woman yells at a cat'' the series.

[@wcw2793]

James Cameron, the guy that got pissed at David Fincher and Fox for killing off Newt and Hicks in Alien 3, helps Tim Miller kill off the most important character in the Terminator series: John Connor. What a freaking hypocrite.... 😑😡🤬

[@ivanthemadvandal8435]

What do you expect from a Hollywierd champagne socialist

[@விஷ்ணு_கார்த்திக்]

​@@ivanthemadvandal8435And a Male Feminist

[@Zero_2500]

Watch the South Park episode about him. Fairly accurate in my mind lol. I actually think Wandavision stole the “they will never know what you did for them” line from that episode. It’s definitely in there

[@xentiment6581]

He had very little input after the main plot was already constructed.

[@georgechapman9688]

I was kinda glad John Connor died. It was like the character could rest in peace after how many different shit versions

[@Adorni]

So, there’s a lot I could say, here. But instead, I’m going to make a comparison: While I can’t find it, I remember a quote from Cameron about why the T-1000 persisted as a cop was because he liked the idea of “danger behind the face of trust.” When being threatened, especially as a child, the first person you’re supposed to look for is someone in Uniform. Cameron said “If I were a predator trying to catch and kill my prey, this is how I’d do it.” The underlying statement being that it was commonly accepted among the left and the right that you were *supposed* to be able to trust a Policeman. Contrast this to the Rev-9, which disguises itself as a Border Patrol Agent. No one likes them. Especially not Hollywood and the Radical Left. They’re often unfairly regarded as something of Trump’s attack dogs, grabbing poor, innocent people and separating them from their families. BP are held in contempt, so naturally it makes sense to make your “Hunter Killer Robot” who’s after the poor little illegal immigrant girl into a Border Patrol Agent. If you have Trump Derangement Syndrome or are trying to make a political statement, anyway. These two approaches are fundamentally different to one another: One is an interesting diegetic decision for story purposes, and the other feels like a way to “stick it to the man.”

[@regiman222]

One has the bad guy making a smart decision, the other is a political middle finger, all I can say is a border patrol guy chasing an illegal immigrant isn't as dumb as chasing anyone else

[@Lupirio23]

@Goat Pretty sure they were referring to the leftist/Hollywood types there as well.

[@RanMouri82]

Quite similar to the decision to randomly kill off John fricking Connor to bring in a young wahman of color. (And *I'm* a Hispanic woman! Thanks, movie, I hate it!)

[@Adorni]

@Goat My sentiment was more expressing the minor annoyance people who travel have getting waylaid at the border and having to deal with waiting in line and having your paperwork ready. Like dealing with the DMV, it's a necessity, but most people who've experienced this tend to find it grating. This tends to paint the picture of "Oh, well it's JUST Border Patrol, so no one will care if we smear them." The almost vitriolic dislike the Radical Left have of BP these days is like dumping gasoline onto a lit match, as a result. So instead of, say, experiencing some minor schadenfreude (I can't believe I spelled that right on my first try, lol) when a Bureaucratic Border Patrol Agent who's giving the protagonist a hassle slips on a banana peel or rips his pants or whatever, we're shown the Rev-9 killing a whole slew of them in what feels like a "let's root for the killer" scene, followed by him assuming the identity of one because they're SUCH awful people that a deranged sociopathic murder machine would fit right into their ranks no problem, right? To be very clear, I find this concept not only offensive, but kind of disturbing. The Border Patrol are not fascists, or thugs, or the KGB. They're law enforcement tasked with keeping very dangerous people from crossing our borders, and sometimes that also means they have to go and apprehend people who's only crime was quietly crossing the border *illegally* because they just needed to get here _now._ But they can also be an annoyance for people who are legally trying to cross the border, too, which is why some people think it's "okay" to mock them or have a disparaging opinion of them. That was my point, and I supposed I could have construed that a little better.

[@Adorni]

Goat Believe me, I understand. Like I said, the way the Border Patrol scenes seem depicted really bother me, and while it’s possible I’m reading too much into The Director’s intent, I don’t think I am. I mean, between the “cages” line, the “detainees” line, the impression that I’m supposed to be smirking and saying to myself “yeah, go get ‘em Rev...” Miller doesn’t seem to think highly of the Border Patrol right now, and he wants to make sure the people watching his film know this. It’s kind of disgusting, really.

[@TLouie2]

Even Jay's internet knows it should kick Jay.

[@bbriggs7409]

Terminator: Please, Just let the Franchise Die 😢

[@pezdispencer113]

DW they are working on it.

[@bbriggs7409]

@@pezdispencer113 😭😭🤣🤣

[@Sizzox]

They should have just quit after salvation..

[@pezdispencer113]

@@Sizzox They should have quit after judgement day.

[@georgechapman9688]

@@pezdispencer113 yup. Film is still and will always be amazing

[@nick_4972]

Honestly I feel more insulted by this film than Genisys.

[@BirdsElopeWithTheSun09]

I think Genisys makes this movie look good by comparison.

[@wcw2793]

Same.

[@FunkMastaMegaFlex]

Right. Terminator Gen was just shit an awful so at least it was sorta funny. This was even worse because it wasn't even a film just some political bantering and bullshit. They should have made a sequel to salvation and called it done for this!

[@Arphemius]

Why are you all calling it "Genisys" by the way?

[@nick_4972]

@@Arphemius That's the title?

[@krennicsaspirations4883]

Terminator: Rise of John Conner....wait....Oh.....oh.....ohhh noooo.

[@bbriggs7409]

Nice profile name 😅😃😃

[@butthz8850]

Yep. Killing kids is ok now.

[@elwootador]

@@bbriggs7409 Beat me to the punch.

[@dakkahead517]

I read this in Mikes voice, from RLM...

[@vaeringjar1387]

(Commenting around the 1:10:00 mark) A lot of the things you're suggesting have been explored in the print media - the novelization of T2 had Skynet using mobile bombs called silverfish that would slither underneath human targets and then explode in the first chapter, which took place just before John Connor sends Kyle Reese back. There was at least one comic series that had Skynet send plasma weapons back by surgically implanting them inside human prisoners. They went back to the 1980s alongside a terminator squad, which then ripped the guns out of the humans. I guess the point is that they used to hire better writers for this sort of thing. Problem with the terminator series is they keep ignoring the established idea that Skynet was acting without much time to prepare when they sent the terminator back to kill Sarah Connor. It was a last-minute tactic, motivated by desperation. This many films in, they've pretty much just forgotten about that. Apparently there's a neverending stream of FutureAIBots that can send murder machines back in time. It's practically a Power Rangers spinoff at this point.

[@Hjtrne]

Any explanation as to why the T-1000 only needed to visually resemble a naked human (while still consisting entirely of inorganic, metal alloy) to be able to use the time machine?

[@vaeringjar1387]

@@Hjtrne Actually, if I remember right (I read it a long time ago and I'm going strictly from memory), the T-1000 didn't appear human when it first arrived; it was covered in a bio-membrane or something. It didn't take human form until it killed the cop who investigated its arrival and copied him. I read the novelization before seeing the movie and remember being disappointed that the cop who was killed was played by a different actor than Robert Patrick. As for "why didn't they cover everything in bio-membrane and send guns/HKs/whatever back?" I don't know. Again, it seemed it was all one-shot stuff they didn't have time to mass produce. I'm pretty sure the T-1000 was unique at that time.

[@CanadianTehGamer]

Well, considering those two movies, like you said, were out of desperation. John Conner was leading the resistance successfully against Skynet and the Humans were slowly starting regain their footing, the AI needed to the Terminator back as fast as possible so as to not lose.

[@auto_mata]

You know, when hearing how they stressed that it was Dani who was the resistance leader and definitely not her offspring, my thought was "So the previous sacrifice didn't even buy a full generation of peace."

[@RogueFox2185]

I honestly wish we got a sequel to Terminator Salvation instead of this garbage, Dark Fate almost makes me want to apologize for every bad that I’ve said about Terminator Genesis.

[@SolarDragon007]

I've heard Sarah Conor Chronicles was great. Too bad that show got canceled for Salvation.

[@RogueFox2185]

I loved that show back in the day, it’s sad that it was canceled on a cliffhanger like that.

[@silvergrove8517]

I wouldn't go as far as apologizing to Genesis, but this abortion of a movie definitely made me change my perspective on Genesis...

[@BirdsElopeWithTheSun09]

Then you need rewatch Genisys, cause it is much worse than this film. You can at least follow what's happening in Dark Fate.

[@diegodankquixote-wry3242]

Life after terminators would have been interesting

[@mymic208]

Mauler: "No Film is perfect right? Maybe" Jay: "I can think of a perfect film.." Mauler: "Name it! Is it Shrek?" Had me laughing so hard it hurt.

[@mymic208]

@The Rotten💯 I think you're thinking too much about a meme.

[@gotherella3963]

The little corner ghostie is adorable and Im going to miss it when it goes away...

[@lekhaclam87]

If only we know where Mauler found it...

[@ianhines2302]

It’s not he ghost of Good Writing

[@Rionecnirp]

Ghosty the ghost of Good Writing is only visible around October because it's the time of year where some undead becomes visible for the human eye. When this time will come to an end, Ghosty won't dissapear, he will just be invisible and always by our side.

[@dusky5535]

Rionecnirp Yes

[@yetanotherspuart3993]

Bestest happy Ghost

[@amandaliberty08]

Shove it into a badger! My new favorite line.

[@amandaliberty08]

@Dog House Oh The Don, I hope so.

[@joth6745]

“I guess we’ll speed through this shit” *proceeds to talk for 3 hours*

[@deathsdoor07]

Hey, that is speed. A normal discussion is eight hours.

[@Maddog3060]

That is speedy for EFAP.

[@johnboko7110]

Put it at 2x speed then if you find it to be long to sit through.

[@darthtyler100]

To efap standards, that is fast.

[@ToriHiragana]

Screen print this comment and come back in 3 years and tell me if I’m not incorrect: • The new Matrix film will feature a new female “One” which the OC cast will train and then be killed off • The Avatar Netflix show will gender swap either Zuko or Iro and the creators will justify it saying the original performance were so great no male actor could compete or some crap • When Keanu is too old to play John Wick it will make way for a more skilled female assassin who kills a whole room with a pencil and saves ALL the dogs and scoffs that he was a has been • They’ll bring back Predator but with an all female solider team in a jungle and who rescue a group of terrified cowering men the Predator is hunting. All the woman will survive and the men will be killed off one by one • They’re going to remake Back the Future call it a sequel and it will star Doc’s daughter who builds her own time machine AND has the adventure • Jaws 5 will star Quint’s daughter or a female equivalent and she will kill the shark on a smaller boat completely by herself In a few years there be no mainstream Hollywood “blockbusters” with male MCs and instead they are going to Invasion of the Body Snatchers them and replace them with politically correct emotionless husks. I’m a straight woman and know what? I prefer to watch strong, tough, capable man on screen because I find it sexy as heck. But that won’t be an option anymore because Hollywood has been thinking for me and has decided I, a successful business owner, can only sympathize with MCs that are my reflection in the mirror because I can’t possibly connect with other people I think they’re projecting Screw them

[@hyponautical1908]

I hope this gets more likes.

[@TheCrimsonFacker]

you have a twitter muh dude?

[@BannedPhotoshop]

Oh God.....The all female "Predator" cast......thats gunna fucking happen

[@samarium1934]

.

[@mothmanofaustraliaradio8888]

not going to lie, id lovre the daughter of doc brown idea

[@heliophobia5279]

at least we have Joker

[@vashviper9346]

Thank the Don we have Joker..

[@SilvrSavior]

This movie is spawned from the droppings of Goliath.

[@woodwyrm]

Don bless!

[@shawklan27]

Yeah that scene about dani being revealed to be the resistance leader definitely sounded braggy to me when I watched it. IT FELT FORCCCEDDDD

[@deadrock1678]

This movie is nothing but "WOMAN POWER" .

[@Soridan]

@chaoszieg Robots can't reproduce through sex. Ergo they represent the neutered feminist ally "men".

[@RanMouri82]

@@Soridan Yup, even to the point of fake-marrying an abused woman. Carl is a robotic white knight.

[@HateshWarkio]

It's kinda weird considering how tiny she is

[@rynuzuri9578]

The best Terminator movie will be the one that is so bad that these movies finally stop making money.

[@Trollificusv2]

That would be this one, then. And while Tim Miller has run Blur Studios for years, as a competent-to-excellent graphics/animation/design firm, hopefully this will end his directorial aspirations. If not his assholial direction.

[@chazfu]

"Shove it in a badger!" - Bigideas in his refutation of Aristotle's "On the Generation of Animals"

[@KorporalNoobs]

That's not what Freudian died for.

[@Ramsey276one]

Timestamp please???

[@nightbreed9305]

Another bad Terminator sequel? I'm shocked.

[@christianguerrero70]

Let's not get distracted by the fact that Arnold said he was glad he wasnt in salvation cause it "sucked".. yet he did genesis and this lol.

[@turtleanton6539]

@@christianguerrero70 loooool

[@silvergrove8517]

@@christianguerrero70 or Linda Hamilton avoiding T3 because she didn't like the plot nor the writing of her character and believed that Sarah Connor had a perfect conclusion in T2 but jumped pretty quickly on the Dark Fate train...

[@gigikent3358]

@@silvergrove8517 bills aren't going to be payed by themselves .

[@davenathan2002]

The Androgynator: Men Can Have Periods Day was a tour de force of modern filmaking.

[@tanookigt]

History will vindicate Salvation as not that bad. Just had a few mistakes that soured us a little. But goddamn, so much better than all the other sequels, and it had the balls to take place in the future.

[@BirdsElopeWithTheSun09]

Salvation starts of really good.

[@GenericGooner]

Salvation’s biggest crimes was being generally meh and having sam worthington as a lead... can’t remember it making too many clanging errors

[@raam726]

I watched salvation last night and noticed that the title appears twice in the beginning credits

[@TheEldritchGod]

I liked it.

[@CruelestChris]

With how bad films are constantly getting, history will eventually vindicate _everything_ as not being that bad. We'll be saying "Compared to _Captain Marvel 35: Strong Females of Wahmen Defeat The Stupid Mens Again While Complaining About It_ , that first one was pretty awesome."

[@leonardodavi2695]

Dark fate is worse than Genesys. Genesys undid T1 and T2. Dark fate made them utterly pointless. R.I.P. Terminator franchise.

[@cleanserofnoobs4162]

So I saw an interview from Jacksepticeye where apparently she had to do the "I'll be back." line multiple times because "it sounded too much like Arnold"

[@zenhaelcero8481]

It's really too bad that Linda Hamilton was brought back, just so they could do *this* with the franchise. It hurts almost as much as Star Wars not bringing Han, Luke, and Leia together again.

[@Cross3061980]

lol, as soon as Jay said "my internet might cut out at any poi-" my video started buffering. Couldn't time that any better

[@OutsideTheTargetDemographic]

"Shove it into a badger" -MauLer 2019

[@Ramsey276one]

Timestamp please??

[@yetanotherspuart3993]

The best line in this whole EFAP

[@paulkielty8385]

Kyle Reece was mansplaning when he explained how to make the pipebombs.

[@SiriusSphynx]

That's when you let the girl boss make her own pipebomb and quietly back away.

[@paulkielty8385]

@@SiriusSphynx fingers in ears, wait around the corner.

[@nerdancer422]

Another sci-fi action entrance in a franchise which should be horror. The first movie is literally Halloween 1 & 2 with robots and time travel as background decoration. until the filmmakers realize that, they won't be able to make a good Terminator movie.

[@MarcTheCyborg]

Watching this and then following it up with IGN’s “best since T2! 8/10!” review was a hilarious experience 😂

[@properduction2586]

Fuck IGN...Fuck Rotten Tomatoes...

[@MarcTheCyborg]

Proper Duction they’re a joke these days

[@anthonywarren9885]

40 million opening weekend isn't good enough to get it's money back.

[@SilvrSavior]

May The Don guide and protect the lost soul of John Conner.

[@orenalbertmeisel3127]

Would be lovely if these short three hour rants became a regular occurrence, if it doesn’t affect the normal efap schedule

[@turtleanton6539]

100% agreed

[@StubbornBullet]

Don't worry guys John will be back in a later film because the dark side of the fate is a pathway to abilities that many deem unnatural

[@annthompson7064]

What can render the first 2 movies pointless.... This movie

[@pezdispencer113]

Star wars beats that, it made 6 movies pointless.

[@annthompson7064]

So true

[@TheSlammurai]

Mauler's Arnie impression is amazing. It actually sounds real as opposed to the over-the-top way most people do it.

[@r.e.z9428]

Can’t wait for Bob’s defense of this movie.

[@r.e.z9428]

chaoszieg More power to ya.

[@ianhines2302]

chaoszieg Not much competition for that 3rd place spot.

[@Grobut81]

Blob review: "9/10, could have used a pinch of eugenics."

[@PassportBrosBusinessClass]

THE LGBT-1000 🏳️‍🌈

[@turtleanton6539]

Lol

[@FaithfulofUltramar]

Start your day with maximum gay

[@kasaibouF29]

better than the T-JEB

[@SumDumGy]

Whoa. 1000? That’s like, binary. Don’t be mis-model numbering.

[@-MrFozzy-]

Well said haha. I liked this!

[@leonardodavi2695]

I find it interesting that the metal rod that REV9 throws, gets deflected by Grace and pierces Miguel's body was aimed for Dany and later they couldn't remove him from the car in time, so they had to leave him to die. They could've adressed that fact later in the story. Dany could've gotten mad with Grace for that, you know... "you failed! you got my brother dead"! or something like that. And Grace could respond: "I'm sorry about your brother, but he died so that you could live. He sacrificed himself for someone he loved. I don't se a more honorable death than that. With his dying words he asked me to protect you and I intend to do just that." This would make me like the movie a little more. Also, Kyle Reese in never even mentioned in this movie, despite the fact that he practically dragged Sarah across the entire first movie, dying for her in the end. But NOOOOOOOOO, we can't aknowledge man's sacrifices anymore...

[@ehcmier]

Back to the Future. The DeLorean goes back in time leaving fire tire trails, and travels forward leaving the car body encrusted with ice (well, the one time in the Mall parking lot).

[@cosmoconkerjames]

Skynet would had won if they just sent back a badger stuffed full of guns with The Terminator.

[@Horvath_Gabor]

The joke is, I have found a Terminator book in our local library that came out way before Terminator 3, and it was a story about how, after the defeat of Skynet, John Connor and company went through the records and realized that Skynet, during its experimentation with time travel, accidentally sent a T-800 to the wrong place and time. As in, medieval France wrong. So, in order to stop if from mucking up the timeline, they send back the only person among them who could speak french, but since she was a non-combatant, they needed a way to ensure she could actually take out the T-800. So, what did they do? They took a plasma pistol, sewed it up inside a piece of beef, and she took it back with her to the past. Mind you, this wasn't some fanfiction, but an officially branded, canon (for whatever value the word has after all these movies) paperback book. So yeah, badgers should work too. :P

[@cosmoconkerjames]

@@Horvath_Gabor I see... Why didn't they make that into a movie. It would had been better then the piece of crap that is Dark fate. haha

[@Horvath_Gabor]

@blackrave404 It also doesn't actually apply for later movies, as a lot of the advanced terminators have no flesh covering whatsoever, and some of them are just straight up made up of living metal or nanites.

[@tadpolegaming4510]

@@Horvath_Gabor which book is that?

[@Horvath_Gabor]

@@tadpolegaming4510 Full disclosure: originally I wanted to be cheeky and just give you a google search link, but then I actually searched for it, only to realize the books doesn't seem to exist on any of the common book databases. So, I searched for it in my native language, and.... bingo! It's a trilogy of proper, fully licensed books that apparently exists only in Hungarian. The book I read, called "Démon a Jövőből" (literally "A Demon from the Future") came out in 1994, written by someone running under the pen name Mark F. Wilson, and it was apparently never translated to other languages. How or why this book only exists in Hungarian is a straight up mystery.

[@imp360]

so no matter what humans do the machines will rise and no matter what the machines do the human resistance will form and defeat them. makes the whole franchise pointless

[@properduction2586]

Logically...The Machines can easily defeat them if the Franchise didnt use Plot Armour...

[@domehammer]

Entire franchise is just about a AI named Skynet raging against destiny so hard it shatters time into a infinite number of alternate timelines where Skynet loses except when it wins in Genisys. The T-5000 from Genisys was Skynet. Making another movie was just pointless. In one timeline Skynet won and nothing matters anymore. Skynet defeated its own destiny to be defeated.

[@sammydray5919]

Someone was paid to write this........ That makes me sad

[@agentcarter2219]

Being from Wisconsin I enjoyed the Badger discussion...

[@lordofthepizzapie9319]

First I thought Mauler was gonna suggest a badger terminator.

[@gwell66v2AnimeReviews]

"how does it feel to have lived long enough to see all your favorite franchises go down in flames?"

[@doubtfulhenry]

Feels great * *is visibly dead inside* *

[@R.J.Godzilla81]

When I saw the first picture of the cast, I thought the augmented human was John Conner. Shortly after I found out no, that was a woman. I just laughed and immediately lost all interest in Re:T3 or T6, LOL; and lost all hope that there'll be a good Terminator sequel, ever.

[@R.J.Godzilla81]

@chaoszieg OMG Yes. Thank you.

[@HerohammerStudios]

Why?

[@khaosanimagoddessofthevoid1023]

( 1:47:11 ) In T2 it was literally a major plot point that the Terminator had to be physically reprogrammed in order to learn human behavior like that. Wow.

[@onegoldengraham]

When will it stop...Hollywood wants to destroy the past rather than try to come up with new and interesting things...

[@sillygoose9791]

These movies are the sort of stuff they'd watch in Fahrenheit 451

[@yetanotherspuart3993]

Still ongoing. Only getting worse.

[@NotQuiteFirst]

It was a bold move to give Dylann Roof a starring role

[@MicahDarkFantasy]

They should’ve renamed this Movie Terminator: The Strong Female Edition!

[@HEARTHLINGjoel]

You go girl!

[@bbriggs7409]

Bestest EVAAAAAA!!!!!!

[@darkmanelboludo]

It’s funny that you have in your profile a genuine strong female protagonist

[@cryw1092]

@@darkmanelboludo I remember her. She's pretty raw.

[@SeiferTV]

Whamenator

[@scampoli25]

Thank you for the prompt upload. I think my expectations were so low from Genysis and the trailer for this that at the end of the day I don't hate it. I thought the final scene at the playground was a great ending to the franchise but I have a bad feeling they will not stop here. Why go out on a good note when there is more monies to make.

[@silvergrove8517]

Damn, who redpilled and based Jay that hard and fast ? #KeepJay

[@zeche8477]

He’s changed a lot since he became aware of the fact that he is the spitting image of Heinrich Himmler

[@scottski02]

@@zeche8477 damn it I can't unseen that

[@milkster213]

Holy shit it's his reincarnation!

[@TheAdarkerglow]

"Sarah, having gone off and started my own business, gotten married, and raising a beautiful young boy, I understand why you cry, and did so at my Son's wedding. You see, Sarah, I can see now, having lived the American Dream, what I stole from you and your son. I know your pain, thinking of how I'd feel if my son, Carlito, came to harm. I hope we can move passed our differences." - I just think this movie had amazing potential as a comedy.... I mean, I'd see it, *Terminator: Borked Fate*, an R rated Action Comedy from an Alternate Universe, where a buggy terminator *eventually* killed John Connor after getting lost for several years, but develops a personality and emotions as he goes.

[@IshanDeston]

Can you imagine how sharp that knife would have to be to cut a fly in midair, with nothing to resist it being just pushed to the side? The mass and force of the blade, along with the width of the blade, should be rather swatting the fly than cutting it. The Fly's mass simply isn't enough to resist the force of the cut for it to cut... you would need some mono-molecular edge or something to do this.

[@pieminator6969]

So... the terminator franchise is limited ONLY to John / Sarah Conor and the T-800? How about a complete different small-scale story, about a few resistance warriors fighting against Skynet post Judgement Day, More like Saving Private Ryan / Full Metal Jacket, less like Terminator Salvation.

[@Adorni]

One of the problems with a "Terminator Expanded Universe" is that it's kind of like Highlander: There's not as much you can do with it that you didn't do elsewhere. Terminator 1 works as a standalone film. Terminator 2 works in a "this is Skynet's literal last resort, a safety measure if the T-800 didn't manage it." After that, any film that involves sending a robot back in time becomes very derivative, very quickly. This is aside from the fact that you have to contrive the idea that "Judgment Day is Inevitable," in order to keep having Terminators come back to the past. Salvation has a similar problem in that there's only so much you can do with the "Humans fighting Skynet" angle, since the canon establishes that Skynet decimates 80% of the Population in almost a single stroke. Doing A movie might work, doing TWO movies might work, but anything more than that is just kind of spinning its wheels. It might be interesting to see something post Judgment Day, that might be something similar to "The Last of Us," where an adult John Conner, pre-resistance, finds a survivor and helps him or her out reluctantly... Or something like that, anyway. A character study, rather than a Blockbuster. But outside of that... eh? What WOULD be interesting is actually examining what would happen if John WAS killed. Would that really spell the end of the Human Resistance, or - as cliche as it sounds - would life still find a way? This would have to involve going into the Future again, like in Salvation, but this time there is no John Conner. You could still have Sarah Conner, the only person who might have an idea that "This is wrong." Maybe have John's wife, from T3? Maybe even have an alternate Kyle Reese, who isn't sent back to the past, now. That could really have some potential, if done right... But I doubt these people could ever be that creative.

[@dragonknightleader1]

The difference between Saving Private Ryan/Full Metal Jacket/Dunkirk and Terminator Salvation is execution.

[@PassportBrosBusinessClass]

Without AHHHHNULD this movie would be a flop.

[@aTalkingKoala8294]

It would flop just as hard as arnolds flappy skin when he runs.

[@b.o.j.1442]

Grapthar's Hebrew Hammer yeah but at least with AHHHHHHNULD it at least has some fun parts

[@codyw1]

Genisys was a good dumb fun bit of cinematic fan-fic. I'm not even seeing this trainwreck.

[@wrayday7149]

Sooooooo, If she needs food every 5 minutes to fight .... shouldn't they of planned their endgame battle at a buffet? I mean, it's not like we don't have those every 5ft in Murica. I will say it now... I kind of liked Genisys.... I just lost all hope on the franchise at that point sooo maybe it was more of Stockholm syndrome.

[@tanookigt]

I think one of the core issues they ran into with this and Genisys, is they are writing the story around the fact that Arnold is old now. So they have to keep working that in somehow, by having a T-800 timewarp in early, then stay in the world to age. If they don't get rid of Arnold then all future films will keep doing this.

[@dragonknightleader1]

Good point and it is definitely retarded since T2 set the precedent that new Terminators don't look like Arnold. They should be casting new flavor of the month bodybuilder or pro-wrestlers or supermodels for Terminators. What if Dave Bautista was a T-9000?

[@ND62511]

@@dragonknightleader1 you don’t even have make it a T-9000 or something like that; you just have a T-800-314 where the first number is the level of advancement and the second denotes who it’s modeled after. Then it wouldn’t cause any issues with the T-1000 because if it an change appearance to any person, there’s no need to model it after a specific person.

[@AllardRT]

@@dragonknightleader1 T2 set the precedent? Make it T1. In Kyle's flashback/nightmare sequence, the Terminator that attacks the human hideout is played by Franco Columbo, Arnie's friend and fellow bodybuilder. There's literally no reason to cast Arnie as the Terminator other than nostalgia and brand association.

[@wopjohn]

It would have been funny if rev9 showed up at car factory and got stuck putting in a full shift waiting for Dani to show up

[@alicesheep6394]

Oh boy lads, the wheel of dark fate is turning, let's rock!

[@rollforrupees6479]

The wheel of fate is turning! Rebel One, ACTION!

[@Sue_Me_Too]

Shooting a pistol accurately is more difficult than shooting a shotgun accurately, but it isn't exactly *easy* either.

[@Laxhoop]

Well in my opinion, T3, out of all of the sequels after T2, COULD have worked. You know, if Judgement Day never happens, then Kyle Reese never has a reason to get sent back. And if Kyle Reese isn’t sent back, then John will never be born, meaning the entire timeline will get rebooted, essentially sending us to the OG timeline, where there was no time Travel, and John Conner had a father who was in his 20s, in the 1980s, and just thinking about how the hell that would work, just messes with my brain. That would have been a massive plot hole for the series. So T3 COULD have worked, if it didn’t completely destroy the message of T2. What they could have done, was focus on the fact that they DID change fate. Some things are inevitable, but humans are able to change fate, and, with enough willpower and determination, also overcome it. If that had been the message of T3, rather than it just being a stupid slapstick take on the terminator, then it might have had a fondly remembered place in the series. The rest of the sequels would still suck, though.

[@RogueFox2185]

I actually like T3 because of what it tried to do, honestly after Salvation they should have moved on from there.

[@BirdsElopeWithTheSun09]

The biggest problem with T3 is it's tone.

[@papershadow]

The thing I would have gone with for T3 myself is, weirdly enough, a little bit like where they try to start Sarah Connor in this movie on the most superficial of levels (fighting Terminators from the remnant of an otherwise averted future). They averted Judgement Day as it originally happened, but whether or not through future Terminators, Judgement Day still has the possibility (not the inevitability) to happen with technology advancing and humans constantly being at each other's throats. So John and whatever supporting cast he has in that film take it upon themselves to try and change things for the better, both with machines and trying to better the world such that such war machines are never needed or created to rebel against humans (the former could be John's role having grown up outside the law, the latter left to people with connections or more "civil" places in the world). I think this would fit better with T2's optimistic-but-not-certain future and Sarah's closing narration, the way she touches on the marvel of a Terminator learning the value of life, some of the introspective moments of T2 like "It is in your nature to destroy yourselves," and the weight of what they accomplished by destroying the roots of Skynet. It could also carry its own aesop about how just because you did one great thing, that alone isn't going to fix everything forever: you and everyone have to continue to act as you learned about the value of human life and being better than killing machines. Rather than undoing T2's ending message, you continue it as something so important it has to be honored even after the climax.

[@michaelplowman8674]

Wouldn't an intelligent attack method for the Robots be to send a large Terminator back that contains a nuke that is simply programmed to get near the person and then blow up? Even if the explosion doesn't get them, fall out should mess them up. The robot could be very simple. Just enough to walk around, know the person they are targeting, and the detonate.

[@matthiuskoenig3378]

you can desise it as a fat man or a little boy

[@dragonknightleader1]

It's possible that too many nuclear explosions in the past will adversely effect Skynet/Legion/whatever in ways it doesn't want. Remember that in T1, the T-800 had to look through the phonebook and killed every woman who had Sarah Conner's name. What if a nuke went off in T2 when Sarah was close to Miles Dyson? Skynet would immediately cease to exist by its own actions.

[@SteveSmith-ty8ko]

@@dragonknightleader1 Using a terminator like a precision knife is much more efficient and safe then using a nuclear explosion.

[@dragonknightleader1]

@@SteveSmith-ty8ko Yes, that was my point.

[@jonthulhu]

I’ve maintained that Terminator needs the Split treatment: make a movie that seems as if it can stand alone on its own as it’s own thing, then reveal it near the end to be a Terminator movie, a la what Split was to Unbreakable.

[@solarsailer4166]

Thank you for watching this crap so the rest of us don't have to. I watched The Terminator last night. (sigh) Such a great film. They just can't or won't make films like that anymore.

[@GenericGooner]

The problem terminator as a franchise has always had (beyond the 2nd movie being the perfect end to the story) is the T1000 was such a perfect enemy they struggled to top it. But dark fate came up with a terminator that on paper should and could have been the best yet, but they never took advantage enough of the separation of the liquid from the skeleton, and they didn’t offer up the additional advantage of the skeleton being part of it in the first place. Had they showed even a hint that the skeleton provides a stronger frame for the terminator, making it even harder to stop when it’s fully together (unlike the t1000 which did seem to be slowed by its liquid frame being punctured) so part of the way they have to kill the terminator is to force it to be separated. Maybe the skeleton is vulnerable without the liquid and the liquid is meltable when not able to hold onto the skeleton. SOMETHING, not just the same but with a new feature to show off

[@JoeSyxpack]

Why does Skynot kill John if he poses no real threat to the future?

[@Galvatronover]

@Oliver Mercer that’s just a theory though

[@coldfusionwaffles]

What's with all these movies using ranged weapons up close, and throwing melee weapons?

[@Loxsas21]

So Arny is raising his wife's son? =(

[@ProxyDoug]

Well, the time travel doesn't freezes things but usually the sand underneath the spot they arrive turns into glass due to the heat.

[@cecilofchristmaspast4186]

Its sitting at 6.6/10 and 67% That's more shocking than finding out its complete shite. From Empire: "Easily the third-best Terminator film, which is more of a compliment than it sounds. It’s great to have Hamilton back in this role, but she’s ably matched by Reyes and Davis." And "For the first time in a long time, we can look to the future of Terminator with hope." *insert J.J.Jameson laugh*

[@Film0Graphic]

I still remember a scene where Grace basically had to spell out to Dani that her dad was dead, to me it just made Dani look so stupid because she saw the Rev-9 disguised as her dad, any rational person would assume the original person that’s now a copy would be dead, due to the copy wanting to cause as little suspicion as possible, if I remember correctly Grace had to explain it multiple times (I may be wrong about that but I remember Grace saying that he was dead a couple times)

[@Galvatronover]

God dammit that was annoying

[@AstartesEz8]

To address Mauler's point about shoving into your badger In the TV show a Terminator posing as a teacher has confirmation John Connor is in the classroom it immediately cuts a hole in its thigh and pulls out a pistol.

[@ProjeKtWEREWOLF]

Flesh holster

[@phangkuanhoong7967]

actually, the whole "only organic things can be sent" is pretty well explained in T1 and T2: Skynet made the Terminator BEFORE it made a time machine. the Terminator is an infiltration unit, remember? and Skynet only send the Terminator back to kill Sarah and John Connor when it was losing the war. So yeah.

[@rockerknight25]

I think Jay hit the nail in the head. The augmented humans probably don't overclock their systems all the time, but fighting the Rev-9 or whatever requires more. An augmented human would probably use their augments to better handle weaponry, or use heavy machinery.

[@99IronDuke]

I will NOT be wasting any of my money on The Herminator crap.

[@Hashbrown1682]

*Expects upload tomorrow Uploads later the same day *IRONIC*

[@IowanLawman]

Omfg tentacle terminators........here comes the Rule 34 crowd......

[@anthonykeller1957]

Please even they wouldn't touch this turd

[@Bad_At_Parties]

Can we finally admit that Cameron has lost his way?

[@Galvatronover]

Did avatar not clue anyone in ??

[@Bad_At_Parties]

@@Galvatronover Oh, believe me, I agree with you. But something about Cameron still gives people the benefit of the doubt. They'll say, "Yeah, he's not as great now, but he made Terminator" and blah, blah, blah. And when Avatar came out people were so dazzled by the effects at the time nothing else really seemed to matter, and the weaker elements of the entire presentation were just ignored. So Cameron just seems to be coasting off old glories while also being excused for making "cool" looking movies regardless of if the story and casting is dogshit. It's incredibly depressing too, because Cameron now seems to just be devoting the rest of his career to more fucking Avatar movies when the original was so much of its own time and a novelty that is no longer relevant in this day and age. I think he'll be sorely disappointed when his Avatar films fall short and don't have the legs the original did, and only could have in that original timeframe.

[@Kernwadi]

A foolish man complains about his torn pocket. A wise man uses it to scratch his nuts.

[@geddyflea6645]

“It’s about family, and that’s what makes it so powerful.” Sarah Conner

[@cleanserofnoobs4162]

Angrey Joe needs to be on efap and discuss with mauler why Joe thinks DF is good and why Mauler thinks it's shit. It'll never happen, but I'd pay money to see it.

[@alexhayden219]

Mauler: There's a storm coming. Wolf: I know.

[@sherlockholmes539]

I have a theory... The production company makes enough from kowtowing to China. That they can afford to preach politics with the english language version.

[@timothydelacy9571]

This is correct.

[@InsolentCrow]

Man, remember when the bad terminator sequels were 3 and salvation? I really miss those days.

[@hecute4932]

F for John Connor... #FurlongManGood

[@dragonknightleader1]

F

[@RanMouri82]

F

[@chrissawyer1484]

F

[@grayski3324]

F

[@delta_dellas2839]

Long Man classify this film as An Unbridled Meh?

[@ScottE-2]

Three things kill the movie: Sarah's change in voice and script makes me believe she's Hillary Clinton but more sexist toward men for NO reason. Why does Danny look like John?? It doesn't make any damn sense as to why she replaced him in the first place. Grace... I have several issues with her that, while not as bad as Marcus, she isn't as interesting as him. Only saving aspect: Arnold is there and the idea of him living life as a human is more interesting to think about than the rest of the film.

[@deadrock1678]

> while not as bad as Marcus She's 100x worse than marcus lmfao, shes a woman that looks like a man. Marcus is way better.

[@ScottE-2]

@@deadrock1678 Definitely true with the big difference being that Marcus actually did shit to warrant him being the main character with a backstory at the start while introducing John Connor.

[@BirdsElopeWithTheSun09]

@@deadrock1678 Mackenzie Davis does not look like a man, she was very pretty in Blade Runner 2049.

[@RanMouri82]

Humanizing Arnold's terminator was terrible. At least in T2, his demeanor made sense. This version had him act way too much like a guy dude.

[@ScottE-2]

@@RanMouri82 As mentioned in the podcast, it didn't make much sense that Arnold became as human as he did nor self-learning. In T2 there is a scene that shows how he became self-aware no longer limited by the read-only function Skynet placed. Here he simply finishes the one task he was went to do and is left with nothing else? The more you look into the film, the faster it crumbles than its CGI performance.