The core of mental health is flexibility!

[@swisscheese2705]

There is a great saying: Those who cannot bend, break.

[@Jennifer-gr7hn]

excellent

[@christinebarone2829]

That is a song lyric, the song is Buildings and Bridges by Ani Difranco.

[@aaronbrutus2654]

Sometimes, if you bend too far, you're already broken.

[@adaley5497]

​@@aaronbrutus2654 all truth.

[@vibinggood22]

That's why most of the coconut trees don't break when there's storm or hurricane

[@janebraun4482]

I think she nails it here. Flexible, adaptable, not taking things too personally or seriously. Not realizing others can misspeak or make a mistake. She means rigid people who can't flex their mind to see that something may not be what it seems. These people won't give a chance, you cannot talk much to them if at all.

[@MsZephyra]

Wow the way you express this really nails it...

[@melliecrann-gaoth4789]

They are very controlling

[@josephcoon5809]

@@MsZephyra What? I’m totally inflexible about child molestation being bad. If you people are flexible about that, you legit have mental issues. There are some morals that we should not be flexible on. You kids need to grow up.

[@sunshinepoppy8459]

She's brilliant

[@lisamarieanzaldua7352]

On point

[@crystallimpert]

I'm a 40 Year Survivor of Human Trafficking. I never thought of this before. Thank you.

[@kikijewell2967]

I'm so sorry you went through that. I hope you're in a better place now.

[@RawBrilliance]

Wow! God bless you! May He heal you in every part of your being.

[@sheilamyers45]

Q❤❤she the best

[@caoimhe95]

I’m so sorry you went through such a thing! I really hope you’re coping and doing better ❤

[@nikkistahr7105]

🫂 ❤ praying for your continued healing🙏🏽🫶🏽🙌🏽👏🏼 proud of you, my beautiful sister.

[@Secretzstolen]

I notice I'm more rigid when I'm not well, when my anxiety & ibs are acting up. But when I'm feeling better I'm more open and flexible. Anxiety does that to the brain

[@TiaEphesians429]

That's true I also noticed when I'm off my meds I tend to hold onto a negative experience longer. I can still get my emotion out and let it go it just needs longer to vent it out 😅

[@PowerRedBullTypology]

SecretStolen. Please try L-Theanine. It's a supplement with a compound found in way lower doses in tea that is calming. However, tea also has caffeine which is what you dont want, so avoid real tea. High dose L-theanine works in 10 mins and anxiety greatly, graetly reduces

[@PowerRedBullTypology]

By the way, you basically described me..i also have IBS (and likely histamine intolerance) ...stiff muscles also cause anxiety so a bath with magnesium chloride is really helpful. Both greatly helped my life. Do your muscles feel tense or relaxed?

[@Tyronehoneybe]

Was thinking the same thing- i have chronic illness. When flaring I’m not nearly as adaptable. But here’s the cool thing with the psyche- PART of flexibility is being able to handle illness with grace, too- and not beat up or guilt yourself for not being at your best.

[@pickupwisdom13]

Great point

[@kd8663]

Flexibility requires humility, humility requires self awareness. That flexibility creates resilience.

[@ulalyons9257]

Yeap!

[@gingergail7849]

Humility is not talked about enough. Good advice to ponder.

[@sthefanimattos654]

not, it requires a neurotypical brain. Unfortunately, not every is born with this type of brain

[@lakshmikrithika2521]

@@sthefanimattos654actually nobody is born with such a brain. We all learn over time. Some faster some slower. Some through self experienced and others through experiences of others.

[@MadFlourish]

but people who promote humility are generally promoting a lack of self confidence rather than actual humility. That's why it becomes problematic - others cannot define your humility for you ie. religious institutions.

[@barkerlandar]

Yep! That’s why you can’t even have a conversation with some people. They are preoccupied with control and are not flexible.

[@sunrise7244]

Well said!

[@Jennifer-gr7hn]

spiritually, that means..humility too :)

[@trafficcontrol2420]

My mother.

[@AF-ke9by]

This happens when people are damaged.

[@masteryoflife5133]

I have had trouble having conversations or interacting the same as a regular person since I was a little kid, I don’t feel like I need to control anything.

[@safamarwa910]

“To self-soothe and self-regulate” speaks volumes. When one is capable of self-soothing, you have accomplished independence & freedom 🎉

[@queenofthebutterflies5212]

Gotta be your own best friend at the end of the day.

[@gingergail7849]

@@queenofthebutterflies5212 I agree. Also, being kind to yourself helps with self acceptance/self confidence, compassion, and being yourself!

[@stackels97]

I used to try to apply this kind if advice to expand myself on my healing journey and it caused me more trauma until I learned that I was Neurodiverse and realised that in order for me to have flexibility around others, I NEED a good amount of rigidity for myself in my personal space. Just wanted to throw this out there because this advice is wonderful for Neurotypical people but not necessarily for ND people.

[@strangeaslife]

Fantastic point

[@alwaysforeverme3841]

Thank you. I was looking for something like this. I'm ND also, only recently discovered (in my 30s).

[@Mary-ew8vu]

Maybe just firm boundaries and routines, but an awareness of the need for flexibility when things don’t go as expected. I need a lot of down time to process in order to offer that flexibility to others.

[@saraalanhank]

My son, whom I adopted over 10 years ago, is the most resilient, enthusiastic, mentally flexible person I know. He is almost always ready to travel, try new food, enjoy new experiences and games. He can solve certain problems in a fresh way. He's very autistic and has learning challenges, so academically he has had to be held back quite a bit. He's such a great kid, but not many people get to see him that way.

[@TheodoreBakes]

Autistic children are some of the most pure precious souls on this planet.

[@susanlisak9018]

Seems to me that autistic children have a broader type of thinking, never fitting one mold and alwa.ys thinking outside of the box. Very sweet and cool!

[@katee8147]

Wonderful

[@BevLockhart-zo8lh]

You're blessed and so is he coz he's got you!

[@meenakothari7841]

Hugs to Your son for being the most genuine and lovable person . God bless him always ❤️ Read dr Eric Berg on Autism and other videos .on Gut Bacteria and poop test to detect the microbiome in the gut.. My son has ocd and adhd . M.reading on the videos on the topics myself . Vit B1 Benfotiamine the fat soluble version of vit B1 and NOT water soluble vit B1 Vit B2 Vit B6 Vit B9 ..(folate NOT folic acid ) Vit B12. Magensium,BUTYRATE from clarified butter as brain needs fat for fuel, Vit D . Also increase the good Gut bacteria. Reduce/ clear the glutamate in the brain. Increase the glycine thro foods Exercise .

[@lorim2000]

That is so well put. As I get older and have help in my life I realize how inflexible I am mentally - I have to challenge myself, be aware, and adapt when my instincts are to be rigid. It’s a struggle.

[@eatnplaytoday]

I think your awareness demonstrates that you are flexibility tbh. Most people aren’t even aware that they have an issue 😅

[@Catalina-Winemixer]

@@eatnplaytoday Being self-aware and mentally ill simultaneously is honestly brutal. I wish I could be screaming at pigeons in the park, but I’m painfully aware of my shortcomings. I just don’t know how to fix them. I feel too flexible some days.

[@QuirkyGirl10]

You are working on it, and that’s something!

[@jules8029]

I’ve noticed this in my father as well… the older her gets the less flexible he is.

[@Uvvibes]

And to never stop learning about yourself or others! It’s been an on going journey for me

[@marcystorck7977]

Yes absolutely

[@cindyyy768]

I'm easily stressed and always amazed when I witness others go with the flow and just maintain a healthy composure.

[@Summer20032]

I’ve been through severe trauma. I was sexually abused growing up, I lost my both parents at age of 11, at 12 I was given to a stranger family to be their housekeeper and look after the children who were my age. I have survived and I’m doing well in life, I have an amazing life that I create for myself. Don’t ever feel like you are a victim.

[@stefance1]

Wow, you are strong and special! You got this! 💪🏼❤️

[@pilarq7886]

What helped you overcome

[@rupaltyagi4121]

U r really very strong dear. May goddess Kaali protect u & bless u always🙏🙏

[@sydneytoday2265]

You’re brave & a role model. Blessings🙏🏻

[@GldnClaw]

I am reminded of D&C 121: My [daughter], peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high.

[@Brooke-zq7se]

The BEST explanation of mental health I’ve ever heard. Really glad to know this, it helps me put things into perspective.

[@charlee302]

I totally agree! For some unknown reason I have always felt like the ability to be flexible was such an important life skill. I tried to raise my kids with flexibility over rigid rules, carved in stone. I never connected it with mental health but looking at past relationships I can see it so clearly.

[@strawverymilktae1280]

same gosh so glad it popped up

[@i.k.7938]

I agree, especially comparing to physical health, it makes so much sense.

[@user-qg1dp3fm3j]

You are totally on the mark. Broadcast it some more and give people their soul parts back. They need to be whole again. Let them sing.

[@SarahPerkins-xg3gf]

She is describing EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

[@Purpurschnecke]

Totally true. It is because mentally healthy people feel safe within themselves, which then results in a wider comfort zone. And that is what leads to flexibility.

[@dwlsn93]

Thank you for explaining how I’m not in a mental institution after growing up with an extremely narcissistic, physically and emotionally abusive, alcoholic mother. I overcame my childhood, my own drug and alcohol abuse, and fringe mental illness to recover from it all, go to college and excel in my chosen field. It took many years of perseverance - but I made it! I’m happy, healthy and living a good life now, by God’s grace! ❤

[@talithajane8155]

Hey I’m on the exact same path, same backstory everything, bent but not broken - very adaptable and can talk to every person I meet

[@dwlsn93]

@@talithajane8155 I love that! Bent, but not broken ❤️🙏🏼

[@charlotte5671]

Like bamboo. You won't see it grow for the first few years and then it shoots up, It's incredibly resilient, flexible & beautiful. I'm on a very similar path - It wasn't easy for sure... By all statistics I should have been a stripper or worse but I had other plans & I'm grateful everyday for the life that I'm living ❤❤❤ blessing on blessings friends

[@sandrahcaustrita3471]

❤

[@shellbellhealing]

Amen sister 🙏 me too. Went through absolute hell as a child and then developed a very scary systematic disease that literally took me to hell but I healed by healing my trauma and being so freaking determined to live a good life and give my kids a better life. ❤ We do recover ❤

[@andreeailie9053]

She knows what she is talking about . So True 💯💯💯💯

[@PassionateFlower]

This is the best visual I've ever heard of I've struggled with mental illness my entire life and have searched everywhere for what seamlessly illustrates mental healthiness the best in summary and this is hands down the single best simplistic explanation of understanding. It makes complete sense! Now I actually have a tangible goal for what to go after in treatment. The more flexible my mentality is and the more adapted I am to various environments and responding with accountability and multiple solutions and not rigid or fixed the healthier ill know I am in a measurable way! I'm sick of people using income level or weight management as the be all end all signs of mental health because there are extremely hard working and in shape people who are seriously mentally unstable out there! American Psycho anyone?!

[@s13283]

I agree with this in so many levels. I had been living in an abusive situation for 6 years, came out with MULTIPLE health issues, now 2 years out, I’m so much healthier then I was and I’m only getting older (and better)

[@danielle-miu]

I have seen some interviews with her and I think she is so knowledgeable, but Jay really is good here. He asks the right questions at the right time to allow her to shine and share her wisdom. Great pairing!

[@kimberlyhonig8030]

I agree with you. He’s an excellent interviewer, right? He allows his guests to speak freely & he asks insightful questions at the appropriate time. It’s a hard trait to master!

[@bleedinketchup]

Yeah he is learning everything he can so he can put it in his courses and pretend that he thought of it himself . The man has nothing if he doesn't have an amazing attention span and the ability to adapt and steal .

[@estherclark820]

Non-flexible person = difficult person. Emotional agility is a worthy goal to set. Love ❤ to Dr. Romani for succinctly spoken insight!

[@BenRobson123]

When we’re depressed and anxious, we become so fixed and rigid. Something I’ve noticed over the years, she is spot on here. Happy people just naturally flow with life pretty effortlessly. The main thing is their self-identity is flexible. They are comfortable, willing and able to have a flowing identity which ultimately serves them

[@cloudslady3400]

This woman is beyond wise…this so true and real I wish I heard it when I was a new born….many of my life problems happened cause I lacked flexibility….flexibility with my own desires and mistakes…flexibility with others identities and choices…the more I heal the more adaptive I get the harder it gets to shake me from within…

[@lizzywilliams9880]

Yes!!! When I'm locked into the problem I know that I'm in freeze mode, my go-to trauma response. It so helps listening to you 🥰

[@michaelvickery5547]

“Freeze mode“. I like that phrase.

[@jeverett1769]

This made a light bulb go off in my head about my own problem I'm stuck on & I was able to find the trauma behind it. Thanks so much for this comment

[@Godsgrace222]

She’s so wise

[@Jennifer-gr7hn]

experience + passion + her personal experience with narcissism, with a purpose to help others understand it.

[@TangerineHorizons]

The trouble is she thinks everyone around her is a narcissist. She’s smart but not wise.

[@giosandoval5626]

Who is she?

[@jeverett1769]

​@@TangerineHorizonsTruthfully, I think modern society is full of narcissistic personalities & everyone has some traits. Hopefully she's able to see those qualities in everyone, without labeling them each a narcissist

[@somethingcreativeprobably5160]

​@@TangerineHorizons She has an entire interview where she mentions multiple times how narcissistic personality disorder is rare

[@kabel7985]

This statement is so true! When I was a young girl I hated change, bc that was what my life was every day - never knowing from one minute to the next what would happen. In order to create a safe space I worried about everything which led to isolation. One summer, as an adult, it was storming - a tornado touched down less than a quarter mile from my home. I was mesmerized - realizing that if it was my time I would not make it through. After that experience, I knew that I could deal with whatever comes my way. As I grew older, I was able to handle change by reframing it as a challenge. Also, age/time has a way of giving one grace to handle obstacles. Love your KZbin channel ❤️

[@aleanajones2050]

Oh SNAP! This makes total sense to me now. When I get stuck/upset/anxious, I HAVE to move my body to feel better. Literally, movement and sunshine help tremendously. Wowza

[@Allyg1741]

I agree and disagree with her sentiment. I agree with flexibility in the sense of exploring personal growth, willingness to take accountability rejecting bad habits, and willingness to take tiny steps to heal. Flexibility can at the same time be misguided and can then turn into being too agreeable, a people pleaser. Too much causes a dangerous imbalance, there needs to be healthy boundaries established otherwise it can lead people through abusive, traumatic, unhealthy environments. Too much flexibility can cause someone to lose sight also of their identity believing a lie that they need to be someone they're not in order to be loved, and rather explore a balance between flexibility, boundaries, and even self-love. All of which are so vital!!

[@lisawilliamson2742]

Well said

[@Monochromatification]

A "people-pleaser" is not flexible. They do one thing, which is let other people's desires predominate, and this is because they lack the capacity to handle conflict. People-pleasing is still a "singular solution" to a difference in desires/perspective. They are only seen as flexible and agreeable to others, yet their lack of self-acceptance and inability to hold boundaries and come to an honest dialogue with others means what they are actually doing is similar to those who cannot accommodate other people's perspective - they just refuse to accommodate their own.

[@AckeeandSaltfish]

Where u disagreed with her had nothing to do with what she said. With most things in life there needs to be balance anyway so someone being too agreeable or being a “people pleaser” is on the extreme and opposite end of flexibility, which is still inflexible.

[@christerjakobsen8107]

A people-pleaser has no ability to self-regulate, meaning they are not flexible.

[@julietteferrars3097]

I was wondering this same thing. Thank you to all the people who replied, it's very helpful.

[@JoAnnaAndHorses]

Ive been working on my mental health for years, and in lots of ways, I've gotten much better. I have a long way to go. My flexibility for changing situations has gotten much better, however, for objects, not so much. Today, i lost a scrunchy (at the hospital, I think, so probably not getting it back), and i cried for about 30 minutes.

[@michellelam5268]

100% true. i have anxiety and one thing ive learned is to just surrender control. let go of attaching urself to a person, result, or expectation. it’s hard but once u do it, u realize that the reality is not as bad as the thought if that makes sense lol

[@sunrise7244]

Wow!!! This is so powerful!!! Put it to the test! The more flexible someone is in its communication without wanting to control or criticize everything you do or say it’s more healthy to have any type of relationship with-if it’s the contrary -> there is the red flag! Move on to those who are flexible, have healthy boundaries and are responsible without being critical and antagonistic in every situation 👍🏻

[@ifnotnowthenwhen9063]

That’s fine ,what if you are flexible enough to take people criticism but the same people are not flexible enough to take it back from you. Then they will call you horrible person forgetting that they did the same to you the only difference is you managed to deal with it

[@nancywells5626]

A fair question to ask them is would they enjoy others treating them the way they set their own examples of treating others? @@ifnotnowthenwhen9063

[@michelleward1173]

❤❤ I'm learning so much!! I just hope they are patient with me.😊

[@kierlak]

In other words: resilience

[@Jennifer-gr7hn]

yes, but I think a "short" falls short. Many may APPEAR, resilient, as I did.....until I crashed and burned physically due to my 3 healing professional jobs, chronic stress in my family, after decades of abuse - I was constantly praised for my resilience..until I fell...a...part. So, I don't think it's all that simple.

[@thecrimsoncreates]

In other words : flexibility

[@PetterssonRobin]

Resilience isn't the same thing as flexibility, although they are partly congruent

[@glittermob9155]

It's adaptation. It started as a survival mechanism. Humans are primed to adapt if they're healthy and smart enough to survive.

[@nonniperkl6273]

Reliance can be just stubbornness

[@Venus-gn5oi]

That’s exactly who I’m. I’ve always known that I’m mentally healthy 🙌🙌

[@ulalyons9257]

Me too!

[@pickupwisdom13]

This is so insightful. Self-awareness is so important to live in peace with yourself and to make peace with others.

[@leebeyou992]

I totally love the analogy of the psyche being flexible the healthier the mind❤

[@Tarotbyaseer]

She, her videos, her books!!! Everything she explains has a deep touch of internal strength and the struggles she has faced! The understanding she holds is brilliant! She saved me from a very dark situation Love you ❤

[@Roothedog]

I found this by learning forgiveness. True forgiveness. For myself, for others, for situations and almost anything else.

[@cathygould]

Definitely part of it ❣️ Holding grudges, holding on to insults and slights, uses up a LOT of energy... Forgive and move on. We're not likely to change people who hurt us physically and emotionally, and they surely don't care about us. Make room in our lives for good things.

[@tikahaake]

This is SO true!! We are catering to individual needs so much that people are not able to build flexibility.

[@msborn2fly]

Adaptability is the core of everything ❤

[@gregdee9085]

a key tenant of "IQ" imo...

[@carlmullerlane]

This is the very basis of Darwin's "Survival of the Fittest" theory. It wasn't necessarily about being the fastest, strongest or most lethal. The core tenant of his work was that, it is the most ADAPTABLE that go on to survive & thrive. 👍

[@carlmullerlane]

​@@gregdee9085 No, not necessarily. In fact, sometimes it can be quite the opposite. I have a Behavioural Science (Psychology) degree, so I'm not being a troll or anything like that, I swear. Whilst yes, IQ can indeed be a useful tool with creative problem solving (a measure of adaptability), this is not ALWAYS the case. Many people with Aspergers Syndrome (or similar high-masking ASD traits) for example, can be quite intelligent, but yet EXTREMELY rigid & inflexible. Same goes with OCPD too. The thing about rigidity is, that it can often have multiple origins, irrespective of intelligence levels. Two notable example of this are a highly critical parental style & a prolonged history of trauma. This can result in pathologically rigid perfectionism, for example, as a maladaptive overcompensating coping strategy. Trust me. Not only is there plenty of clinical & empirical data in support of this, but I can attest to this personally. I was raised by a mother with undiagnosed OCPD with comorbid moderate grandiose narcissistic traits, plus I meet several specifically defined ACEs (adverse childhood experiences) & suffer from CPTSD as a byproduct of many highly traumatic events. Despite always been regarded as being highly intelligent by my peers & superiors, I am crippled by pathologically rigid perfectionism, social anxiety & depression, as I overcompensate for a highly critical, devaluing mother, with unattainably high rigid standards, & a strong belief that there is only ONE correct way of doing things. And even when you get that right, she will gaslight you & say you didn't or then lie about what her requirements were in the 1st place. Thing is, she's not evil or anything like that. It's just that she's carrying around the demons of her own childhood (intergenerational trauma), but lacks the self-reflective capacity (due to the underlying narcissism) to recognize & do anything about this. So trust me when I say, rigidity can override intelligence (as a trauma response) when a challenging childhood results in distorted negative perceptions of self, or alternatively, when some other underlying condition is at play (such as ASD). BTW, sorry about the long rant, must just be one of those days, I guess.

[@Ec-gl5ix]

Resilience and adaptability is a neuropsych skill that is naturally developed, but then honed by epigenetics. Higher Hippocampal levels seem to dictate one’s ability to adapt, cope, preserve, problem solve.

[@rpmmoth712]

Sometimes it gets tiring though. Especially if you are used to these situations then you subconsciously find comfort in attracting more of these situations and it gets tiring.

[@jeanannedupratt7075]

@@rpmmoth712 Surrender it up. It'll be taken care of. You'll see. 🙏❤️

[@rpmmoth712]

@@jeanannedupratt7075 thank you for your kindness. Appreciate you

[@CephalopodsArePeople]

@@rpmmoth712boundaries my friend, that doesn’t make you inflexible or less resilient but it helps you break the cycle of toxic relationships. Coming from someone in trauma recovery, it gets less exhausting the more you heal and move through it and get solid foundations for your boundaries. Tell yourself “I love you” every day, you deserve it.

[@conceptsmorose]

Well said

[@cherylmcpherson8383]

I can be flexible when people are not toxic and not trying to manipulate me and others.💯💝

[@deyonnedee2818]

I love this! Further, mentally healthy people... create boundaries and look after yourselves.

[@intrinsic.mystic]

Its because of Dr. Ramani that I finally escaped my brainwashing and finally left. Bless this woman. Protect her at all costs. ❤️‍🔥

[@Thatonechick778]

Me too. I wonder how many thousands of people she has helped escape and heal ❤

[@sandrahcaustrita3471]

Facts!❤ I learned as a child going through family trauma and losses to the last one standing How many times I bend and sway to flow with the wind / life. I been told many times how easy I can Blind in and adjust to many environments And situations. That’s life! You get lemons you make lemons aid 😊 I am grateful and bless .

[@evasiminbierwirth2380]

This makes so much sense ! I have often been told, that I need to be strict towards one direction. But my inner wisdom always told me to be flexible and understand all behaviours but build my boundaries within that system. I think that mixture is key ❤

[@___GoneBoy]

This woman is such a gem during these new times.

[@blaackberry]

This makes me feel better about what Ive been through. Ive endured tremendous trauma and yet, Im still here as hopeful and bubbly as ever. A little more reserved but still kickin lol

[@MA-RI-A999COSMIC.DRAGON.TEMPLE]

I love how she puts it, very intelligent perspective

[@liana2136]

I am a substitute teacher, and many kids have trouble if the routine goes a bit differently when their regular teacher is absent. I have often suggested that they learn to be flexible and consider it a life skill. I didn't realize how significant my advice was.

[@Richard_AKL]

It's not being stressed because you're confident in your ability to navigate whatever life throws at you.

[@FIONA21ful]

Yes. I, the supposedly "crazy one" in the family because I went out into the world & had experiences, have truly proven myself in middle age to be a most understanding & empathetic person . Our flexibility of mind & life attitude is despised at times until we are needed & it is we whom they turn to for understanding.

[@jeanannedupratt7075]

Yes, you are the one chosen to break the generational curse in your family. It requires strength, empath, being unconditional and even forgiving. I am sure you are doing a great job. Of course you left. You had to. But when they cannot cope, you come back to help them out, don't you ? Are they grateful ? Of course not. The poor things live on a lower vibe. Just continue to have faith in your passage on this earth and surrender up what is too heavy to bear. Keep occupied in your progression. You are loved. And protected. 🙏❤️

[@FIONA21ful]

@@jeanannedupratt7075 Thank you Jeananne , you summed it up beautifully. I see you too have lived to develop wisdom & compassion, I appreciate your kind words, its lovely of you to take the time. Greetings 💚☘

[@jeanannedupratt7075]

​@@FIONA21fulLife is so precious Fiona. We go through it committing to learn as eternal students of this Universe. Leading with the heart is good. As is knowing when to walk away, no matter how hard it feels. I am grateful for what I am today at 71, for what I have by way of health, three grown children, memories of my two husbands who did their best as partners and I am especially grateful that I find other people like you over Facebook who are not afraid nor ashamed to reach out and say their piece. Be Blessed. Trust your gut, Love. It guides us well.

[@rroman2752]

Agree!!!! I wanted to do many things in a day and felt there was no way because I was dependent on other people also and I thought whats the worst that could happen? Well maybe ill have to do things the next weekend, others monday maybe tuesday and I relaxed and guess what I did them all. I felt that because I released control I was able to let in the solutions. Felt wonderful!!!! Even did other things.

[@sanji546]

She is so right whenever we don’t adapt whats goin on the more we prone to get depressed We can see from people of palestine how accepting they of their situatiom

[@NanaBanana-bb9wc]

Absolutely the truth and best explanation of how I feel about it myself and I have adapted and grown with every trauma and learned that can be able to get through anything and see various ways to solve a situation

[@MsRaquelD]

wow I have never heard this before; flexibility! adaptability, self-awareness, awareness of others, the ability problem solvinig; to self-soothe, self-regulate!! SO good. Coping mechanisms...

[@rroman2752]

I have overcome so many challenges and I think this is precise what has helped me. I am solution oriented. In every situation I immediately think what's the remedy? and don't dwell on the "problem". Like Wayne Dyer said, problems are an illusion and I stick to that. Carl Jung famously said, “The only way out is through” so its in those situations where you stand like a palm tree in the midst of adversity. Having that heart/brain coherence where you feel you've done the right thing and still things apparently aren't going as you wanted I remind myself of Neville,s wise words, "What I have done I have done, do nothing" and remain trusting my intuition through the whole process until I get to the other side. I remember times saying, I don't understand, I don't see anything working out or any possible solution, but I trust you God/Universe and its wonderful when you reep from what you've sown.

[@kklking2013]

This is the Best advice to describe mental health OMG I love this woman she helps you to understand how to deal with these demon possessed narcs behaviors!!!

[@MrAlysavielma]

This is how I’ve live for a while. Anytime anything happens that I can’t control I remember that I am adaptable and I can work with what I have.

[@incognito595]

I thank God that I am not a narcissist. Thank God for small favors. They don't know what Love is.

[@shelbyspellman3046]

I know this was about mental flexibility but this clip told me to go stretch my body physically because baby it’s stiff !

[@MostBoringNameEver]

Ugh, SAME...

[@shelbyspellman3046]

@@MostBoringNameEver I do “Yoga with Adrienne” on here . She’s good !

[@achtube85]

It goes both ways 😊 The more flexible our body is, the more flexible our mind becomes. And viceversa. They are both in constant communication. When I am meeting someone I know I will have a difficult conversation with, I take some time to do some stretching, mobility training, dance, animal moves (Animal Flow)...

[@shelbyspellman3046]

@@achtube85 wise !

[@everlyting7587]

Brilliant, another part is being able to accept when something isn’t going as you wish it was. Though I do have some mental differences that can make me a bit rigid and I’ve worked on to let me be more flexible and regulate myself so small things don’t feel so disastrous, I’d venture to guess this applies to most people: You may be accepting bad things in your relationships/life because you are able to be ‘flexible’ (perhaps you learned to be so when there was no other choice). So you may be accepting loss of boundaries and stuff like that. But understanding the healthy ways to be flexible made me realize that I was being rigid in the sense that I thought a relationship or job HAD TO workout even though it wasn’t working for me and was in fact hurting me. It’s easy to one day find yourself in that situation and be in denial. Being able to recognize something isn’t working for you and leaving rather than doing everything to make it work is part of this too from what I understand. Part of why you may not leave is because you can’t handle change, even if it’s change for the better.

[@UNTOPPD]

that was a great answer for the definition of mental flexibility.

[@TheALLYISLAME]

shes so well spoken! i love dr ramani ❤

[@user-dr6vj8ez9q]

Wise words & makes sense! ❤

[@deec411]

so true it's amazing how I come across these things that are so pertinent in my journey. Thank you again.

[@cathygould]

Yes‼️ If we are resilliant, we can recover from extreme trouble and tragedy. It's difficult, but not impossible .

[@CaptainAMAZINGGG]

Something that helped me with this, aside from journalling and answering questions/prompts like what IS that version of me, what thoughts or feelings does the version of me that is x,y,z have etc.. was handstands, and cartwheels. I was terrified of being upside down and also just being in that type of motion. When i was able to comfortably put myself in a handstand against the wall, with my back towards the wall, i swear it accelerated a major shift in consciousness. I felt the leveling up, acutely. Before then, i was in what i remember to seem like a darkness, a fog, and yes very rigid. I may be neurodivergent but never saw anyone and i have gone through my life accumulating traumas tbh. When i was able to shift, i felt a whole other level of awareness and i was capable of so much more clarity, i was able to do regular things i never could do that others seem to have no problem with (general life or outside things).. it was very interesting to experience. Something else that has always helped was yoga. When we are flexible or rigid in one way, we tend to be so in the other. Either physical leads to mental/emotional, or vice versa. I noticed a huge decline in my life and inner self in many ways, when i stopped doing yoga. It didn't occur to me for a while but when i look back, i noticed that issues (including general flow of life, self, creativity, abundance etc) did coincide with that. Again, very interesting indeeeed. ❤

[@beabeauty]

Very interesting, thank you

[@marfractal8653]

Omg!! This is a golden nugget 🙏

[@Alicia-vq8jg]

I find just doing affirmations helps me so much I got stuck on Mike’s stupid stuff like feeling like a loser but I literally just change my thoughts doing one thing at a time is so helpful

[@christinav3383]

Exactly self care and self nurture is the ultimate. I did it after decades of narcissistic abuse by no contact. It’s been 4 years now and I feel born again.

[@ana-maria6443]

I've never thought about this but she is spot on!

[@leeluvslife]

One thing mental illness often takes away is your ability to be flexible and adapt. I have panic disorder, and I think about this all the time, how inflexible it's made me in life.

[@breathebeloved]

Me, an AuDHD person with CPTSD who has spent my entire life learning to mask and adapt myself to situations and others, to be hyper-aware of and accommodating to others, and to problem-solve in novel and creative ways: "Well gee, I must be the pinnacle of mental health!"

[@Nebulous1225]

Im sorry. Go for the least resistance. Don't bend over backwards for others. Become flexible to fit yourself in a way that doesn't use all your vitality masking + putting them first. She said self soothing and self regulating ,meaning do what you must to work with others, then develop an ability to bounce back in a way that isn't so hard on you. That would be peak mental health

[@PricklePrice]

True, true & friendships are best for human relating, acceptance & affirmation of who we are 🙇‍♀️❤ Capacity to grow & in severe stress to survive without damage to our core is important.

[@Just-do-it-zr]

She is soo intelligent and then some! ❤

[@ettahiang9928]

I have never really understood this, finally someone who explains it really well!! A sound mental health is being flexible and adaptable. Thank you so much for the clarity!!

[@Dorythefish13]

This is so true. I call my rigidity 'rock brain'. This can be worked on, like most things, but its tough to change. Its rooted in shame, and conversely, in pride.

[@cataleyaayabombe8403]

makes sooo much sense.

[@MizzNee796]

I think I'm healthy! When I was going through my divorce, I remember telling my self, " I will bend, but zinc won't break!"

[@mediocresunshine]

AMEN. I may be traumatized and mentally ill but I am FLEXIBLE which makes me appear healthy, and appearances are all that matter. Ask anyone who’s around me

[@maddieb.4282]

This is incredibly articulate and valuable

[@jenninemorel7693]

Hmmmm...and physical exercise is good for mental health too ❤

[@sharonkachel]

Omg! Yes! Thanks for saying this!!! Brilliant

[@MNIU_]

I can’t believe KZbin videos are speaking more positively and affirming me more than people in real life 🫠

[@pierm5]

Her voice is SO CALMING!!❤️🩷💙

[@vibrationoftheone]

What a great point. I think people realize if you have many different kinds of friends with many different personalities perhaps thusly you have a flexibility.

[@vickibazter3446]

Good point

[@vickibazter3446]

Dr. Ramani is excellent

[@yasminhales9894]

The core of mental health is flexibility. So physical flexibility is adaptability which becomes metaphorically represented mentally. The less healthy the personality the less flexible the person. If a tree is flexible it can bend in the wind. Remember those wise, intelligent words ❤

[@DavidBruceChadington]

Never thought about it like that. It was important even back then, when people needed to survive in the wilderness so we can be here today.

[@wildphoenix7861]

Experiencing this right now, but working thru it and coming out the other side, healed. 🙏😌🙌🏼

[@izziebon]

Emotional intelligence

[@shesaid8494]

Our couples therapist used the word rigid among many others to describe my husbands personality. This just clicked 🤯

[@cameronjournal]

Do you have a real problem with him or are you just having an issue with him knowing what he wants and doing it?

[@shesaid8494]

@@cameronjournal do you actually know me or are you just trolling bc you have no life?

[@user-vi3re9wr3o]

Beautifully said.

[@sunnyydee]

Aw i feel a lot better knowing this. Especially dealing with a coparent. Im always ready to accept whatever comes my way. Never any excuse 🤗

[@ElizabethMohr]

This is beautifully succinct and truthful. Really helpful, thank you. ♡

[@thewayteacher]

Where I started “self soothing” as a child I have used it so much in life. And have almost automatic peace in some storms of life. I believe honestly, with the way God has shaped my life that Holy Spirit was the one who whispered it to me and my spirit held onto that wisdom…. I would be terrified to do something wrong as a child and await the consequences…. The terror that would run through me… one day I heard in my mind, “this will only last for a short time and then be over.” Those words are not much from a human mouth, but with the revelation of God it brings strength to the bones and peace as if being led by a gentle stream… I later heard this again when I was an adult going through abuse from several people I loved very much. But new worlds came, “there is always someone who has it worse…” seemingly so cliche because it is said so much but so deeply true and it saw me through… those words by themselves are not much but the peace Holy Spirit brings with it sees you through things others might would crumble dealing with…. I pray all who desire His presence and peace be granted it in full. ❤

[@lovethisday6511]

Darwin even said that the most intelligent will not survive, the strongest will not survive, but the ones that are most adaptable to change.

[@QuirkyGirl10]

When I was much younger, I struggled with flexibility. I realized early enough in life that this was going to be a problem, so I slowly started changing my mindset, and now I’m much happier. I’m definitely far from perfect and still need to work on being more flexible, but one thing that really has helped is seeing my parents who struggled with adaptability (esp my dad) grow old. That has been even greater motivation for me to continue working on myself.

[@CrystalNoibat]

...or it's a trauma response where we mirror other people's personalities.

[@Sheperdsdaughter]

Wow, I've never heard anyone define mental health so precisely. 🎉😊👏 👏 bravo! She is actually very correct!