The Horrible Truth About the No Contact Rule

[@MisfitsJOE]

Funny, I use the no contact rule to get away for good, not to get her back.

[@sarahjanes6949]

Don't do no contact! Just give space if you want them back. A light text every few days and a call once a week, if they don't respond, they're not ready. Keep trying, but don't beg or plead! They'll come back. AND respond to them if they reach out! Worked for me in just about two weeks, we're back and more committed than ever.

[@SoberIrishman]

Guys....do not disappear for 30 days. Keep little hints that you are still thinking of her, boost her ego always. Yes, 30 days away may fix it, but DO NOT disappear 100%....ever Women think that means you DONT CARE.

[@Alina-nt1kz]

It is true that us women have always been taught to wait for a man to text or call first. So if a man decides not to talk to us, we feel we must wait for the man to message first and that he must be no longer interested. Like the whole "if a man really wants you, they will talk to you"

[@mountainconstructions]

About time someone on KZbin spoke the TRUTH!!!! Ive got every girl back from communicating with her, letters, emails, texts, whatever feels right.... The No Contact rule for guys is total and utter BS, its a death sentence! I promise you 100% your lady will just vanish if you try it. You are just reinforcing to her that she doesnt matter to you in the slightest

[@timcross11]

This guy is so spot on. I started the no contact rule then saw this video. I last 3 days. When i reached out she said i thought you lost total interest in me. If i left it 30 days she would of naturally started moving on. Mended this and started again!!

[@joshuank7533]

Thanks for being so down to earth and revealing the harsh truth rather than creating false hope.

[@lyonpuia2818]

Dan Bacon my girlfriend said she wanted to break up. I thought she really meant it. So i applied the no contact rule but it didnt make me feel any better. I started realizing that i would never see her again and i really love this girl. After seeing this video i messaged her and she replied telling me she couldnt move on as well and we realized that we still wanted to be together. Your advice in this video saved my relationship and i cant thank you enough, so different from what all these other online coaches are saying but so true!! Thank you Dan Bacon from the bottom of my heart.

[@Weeeelium]

I hope I can help someone out there. The one I love did not reply for 3 weeks. I think a lot during these times. Helpless and all. But I search and find out for myself that I have to be positive and believe that everything is going to be okay no matter the outcome. Although for sure I hope she would reply me. Instead of playing games. I used my heart and think and be genuine. Do what you can, and think from the other person’s perspective. U can’t make her reply you. You can only be a person worthy of her to reply to if she means that much to you. Today she replied me I couldn’t believe it. Stay positive and be honest with yourself if you see a future with her or unfinished business. Be genuine despite all the teachings there are on the internet and KZbin. I wish you all well and you get what you want. Be grateful for all the things u already have. And remember being grateful does not mean you will not feel sad and other emotions. Have a great day everyone.

[@lelanievanheerden1744]

I am a woman. What this guy is saying..is WORD! He clearly understands the mind of a woman. Listen and LEARN.

[@maeuschen22]

As a woman this is so true! Whether she dumped you or you dumped her shes likely to do the no contact rule, so if the guy does it too obviously there's very little chance of you getting back together cos she's wanting you to contact her (the whole reason she does no contact)! If you go no contact as well then we just think the guy doesn't care and so what else is there to do but move on. Also even if she dumped you cos she wanted you to treat her better (spend more time with her, put more effort into the relationship, be more attentive, etc), you going no contact is just reinforcing her belief that you don't give a crap about her.

[@rontonimo1135]

I was doing no contact, and thank God I saw this video I called to leave my wife a message, and she answered to my surprise, we had a light conversation. Talked for 15 mins, and even made her laugh a few times. Great insight thanks.

[@whywazzup]

This video is very accurate. I am doing no contact right now with my ex boyfriend and its been almost a month. I was completely devastated and did not expect the break up but as soon as I started creating the distance, I was able to reflect and realize why the break up happened. I started the no contact rule to get him back but now I realize its a way to start no contact and the intent can change over time. Im doing no contact now because I want to move on and build my confidence. The distance and no contact pushed me to move on even when I wanted him back !

[@nikihutnik]

Exactly. Being ignored by someone who is supposed to love you only brings up fears of abadonment and triggers a brain response of physical pain. Was the worst thing I ever had to go through..considering I had grown up in an abusive home and a 16 year abusive relationship. Was absolutely terrible. Will never forget the feelings it brought up that I wanted to go away for so long. No contact made me move on to someone who cared...not someone who ignored me. This is the absolute truth.

[@ivyloly5254]

I agree. A month is too long!!!!!!!!!!! In a week, we have more than enough time to reconsider.

[@AM-yj5jx]

If my man will disappear for a month, it means, he gave up on me, and he so much doesn't care about me, that he puts me trough such long and deep hurt. And such pain for that long will surely kill love I had for him.

[@omar6903]

You’re absolutely mastering WOMEN!!!!! Im impressed!!! This is 100% truth!!! If a guy apply no contact on us women, we just simply move on.. coz we just assumed Men just being asshole..

[@arshiaalexander]

No Contact rule is bs Start fresh like friends Look back and realize what did you do that attracted her in the begining and what type of person you were before she gets cold. Be her friend but do not be her best friend. Keep contact minimal and try to flirt here and there with her. Re attract her by working on your self and getting to the good old you and make her falling in love with you again by even being a better version that she has ever seen of you. P.s. our relationship was filled with honesty respect and no fighting for almost two years. Every story is different. One tip i learned from by breakup: I ended up living for love instead of living with love Wheb she met me i was super outgoing with pattion and then life changed i lost confidence and got too needy. I watched every single video from most good coaching channels and selected the tips that were actually matched with my type of situation. Learn to love yourself first so they can love you Im being more productive now and things are actually slowly changing for me in a good way. Soon i will fully have her back

[@nikokaapa]

No contact is to walk away and NEVER look back. If things start to heat up again: fine. If not: fine.

[@blackharpy7468]

Now, this really counterdicts what most trainers say. Dan Bacon, I salute you!

[@sallykoyier499]

This information is soo true.. No one could have said it better.. In the no contact rule, a woman learns to forget you. It doesn't work for men.. It favors the woman more

[@nhayohmee]

Wow this is so true, i been on a binge watching these videos and this one of the more accurate ones!

[@smooy1000]

very well said. thank you, and youre right women wont usually go back if the guy never contacted them.

[@jao9443]

Wow, i was trying the NC rule and im on my 6th day of giving her space!!!! im so depressed and paranoid these past few days overthinking that she has a new guy now. I really feel lucky that i found your video man. now i feel like she really is for me. thank you so much! ill go get her back!!!!!! It's time. She's my Woman!

[@jamesrodriguez114]

I watched this vid and the long distance one just last night and I made contact first and now I’m meeting up with her this weekend! I worked on controlling my emotions, my health, and I got my dream job Ive been chasing for seven years. Im excited to get her back and put the puzzle back. Thank you Dan, I was a firm believer in No Contact and I was doing it until I saw this. Be sure to feel good about YOUR progress, boys!

[@girltalkbyliv3047]

Very sensible. Glad im a woman 😁 Before a woman walks away it means she has done everything she could to save the relationship. Most of the time when she agrees to the break up easily or she breaks up with you, it means she's fed up. A man better move fast or else she will reach the point of no return. I'm currently doing the NC cause he broke up with me the other night. After I said my piece, i told him maybe he's right that he's breakin up with me. I didn't say that just to hurt him or play mind games, I meant it. After all that I put up with in the relationship, I'm not even sure I want the relationship back. If he doesnt contact me in the next few days, I'm done. My mindset right now is that I don't think he deserves me and unless he will initiate in the next few days and is willing to make MAJOR changes, i know i need to just move forward. I'm just tired. He would have to move heaven and earth for me to believe him again. It's about time I think of myself.

[@carolb3869]

If you use the no contact rule to get someone back you’re playing a very risky game. It smacks of abusive control. Treat your partners well - respect first & always. As a woman, being ignored is not pleasant or appealing. Authentic respectful communication is best.

[@colin8302]

seriously, no contact rules is just like gambling...

[@sallyjo7119]

Thank you! No contact is dangerous, relationships need communication, the opposite of no contact.

[@mystarkiller1]

I think that's one the most realistic mature advice of dating I heard on KZbin 4 a while

[@ssjlkrillin]

Your videos should be getting more views. I as a man instinctively knew the no contact rule was ineffective (women desire contact) but so many "experts" are on here giving this bad advice mostly to men. You need to become more or the man you were when you both met; it doesn't matter of she is in a rebound relationship or not, she will reach out to you because that's what she wanted from you in the first place. I wonder how many of these "experts" have healthy relationships.

[@STFU255]

This is true She told me Let's Just Be Friends Told her I was not interested She only wanted to be friends Haven't heard from her in over 4 months If they lose attraction it is OVER

[@feleashiadenbeste4131]

So true my ex and I broke up and because he hasn't contacted me, it makes me want to move on because I feel like he doesn't care about me and the relationship. No contact is a turn off. We could have worked things out by talking but now I just don't feel like I matter to him.

[@jakk323able]

Thank God, I stepped up to this vid. Today was my seventh day of no contact. She dumped me, and I just initiated to text her. It's going well.

[@EpicDIZ]

Guys listen to this dude. Write it down. Follow it. Live it. I did and I went from being blocked on everything to having her text me last night and ask me to come over once she put her daughter to bed. It works. I don’t have her back yet but I’m well on the way. Thank you Dan. Your steps are amazing. I don’t know how to ever thank you.

[@jayc342009]

You probably won't see this, I was going to apply the no contact rule for 30 or more days. Now seeing this video, I will NOT do that. I will reach out and make her feel wanted, which I failed to do at the end of the relationship.

[@generichigh5770]

Guys. This is the truth. Trust me. After trying the no contact rule for over a week. I felt her pull away even more. And i truly almost lost her forever. I went and saw someone for guidance. And they told me I have to pursue her. I already gave her the space. And was working on improving myself. I just had to show her and not just tell her. And I got her back soon after.

[@djRichyRichh]

So true. U r the only one Who is saying the truth.

[@DanBacon_]

Thanks for your support Davor! Much appreciated.

[@truthiseverything9511]

Being separated for over thirty days has only served to make his neglect, emotional and financial (taker) abuse all that much clearer. I remember EXACTLY why I broke up with him. If he had come back within the first week or two I may have taken him back, so I'm grateful to have had the space to heal and re-calibrate my boundaries for my next relationship. Level up!

[@Rachel-mh1jn]

This is so true I'm a woman and if a guy didn't get in touch for 30 days iv moved on by then!! Over it bye!! And il end up hating him

[@milesmatulionis]

This info is 100% correct, I tried going no contact and my ex got engaged and married to another guy 🤦‍♂️

[@Troy12-fitnessmodel]

This guy is spot on. Ive been NC with my ex for 4 months now and nothing. If shes dumped or finished with you...move on and work on you. Its likely as this coach says..shes done with you The only thing from this video is how can a guy level up in 3 to 7 days though?

[@DanBacon_]

Level up within 7 days by becoming more emotionally attractive. How? I provide the quick, step-by-step training in my program: store.themodernman.com/get_your_ex_back_super_system.html For most guys, it takes watching the 10 hours of the program before they are ready. Most guys need the help. It's not something you can usually do on your own within 3 to 7 days. If you try to do it on your own, it can take months or years. I've heard back from countless men who've gone through the training, contacted their ex and gotten her back within 3 to 7 days and for some it takes 2 to 3 weeks. Cheers, Dan

[@raziyababayeva]

Its right. I will never want a man to use no contact. Its like he does not care. Women do not need men who dont care

[@winterandchaos]

I watched a lot of "No contact rule" videos but this one is truly realistic. It has perspectives for both men and women. I truly love her but if i will follow the 30 days ncr, she might think that i already forgot her. When we are still together, she usually got mad if i didn't reply immediately or no contact for a whole day. She broke up with me because of personal problems. She got tired of me emotionally drained. We broke up this april 17, and today is may 19 it's been a month already. We still had some conversations that time but more on begging, sadness, and sometimes normal convo. But now she literally deactivated her account. I guess she's still not okay. I'm sad but I'm not giving up on her. We had a promise next month. I hope she will notice me that time. I'm not gonna talk to her for a week i guess to give her some space. This is too much pressure 😔

[@magusbernie8161]

100% right. I did this on my own and spent the week working on myself and it is really looking promising. I am going in slow and am not giving her the edge as I am not showing her emotions and being vague about my daily life. I guess mystery is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

[@Ribney1]

No contact really only works if you do the breaking up.

[@camphalsell9232]

You can only use no contact if you are in the right. If your not in the right it won't work

[@intuitiveself-love9513]

I broke up with a guy because he was breadcrumbing me and I told him to not contact me now! I will only take him back if he asks and really starts treating me as he treated me when we met. Otherwise I am not interested. No man is worth the headache lol

[@imbonnie]

This is much more realistic than most vids about no contact.

[@kyle_OT]

So my ex and I have been texting but she refuses to get on the phone with me or meet up with me. She short texts me all day and tells me that she just feels it better for us to be apart. We were each other’s first with EVERYTHING. I took her for granted the last 4 months and now I’m stuck dan.

[@jellymedina]

I know this is geared to men but it's 💯 true. My ex left me and had he made a move within the first 30 days I probably would came back but now I'm over him. If he wants me to chase him even though he dumped me he's got it twisted

[@socalguy97]

I agree. It doesn’t always work. Any “expert” who says it does is looking for your money, your subscription, or a like on their page. There are variables to be considered. I’ve had it work for me; I’ve also had it fail. I’ve had it fail more than I’ve had it work, to be honest. And it’s by and large because of what’s been said here in this video.

[@aysj5711]

Thank you for the 3-7 days it worked

[@queenzfineschic]

Very true this rule will make a woman leave a man for good

[@halfanonymous1385]

I was listening to this out of curiosity of what the difference is for guys going no contact on a woman instead of a woman initiating no contact on the guy. I have to say that the gentleman speaking on this video is pretty spot on from a woman’s point of view. Looking back on my past relationships, what he’s saying would be true...for me at least. I’m on week 3 of nc with my ex and even though I have my moments where I miss him, I feel more disgust now then love. Three weeks ago I felt like I was dying and was totally caught off guard about what happened. Now, I keep busy and do things that I enjoy to preoccupy my mind. My ex did reach out with a stupid and lame text earlier in the week and I replied back with one sentence just to not be a jerk and now for the past few days I am really debating if I even want him back. Once I get past the debate in my head, then it’s done. Always done. Usually takes a month or two but when I push myself to do what I need to do for me mentally, you’re done. This is when they ALWAYS come back but sorry, you made me strong and made me not want you back. I feel disgust for what you did to me and then disgusted by the thought of ever having you back as a boyfriend. Hope this helps give you guys that are hurting and want to be better and are sorry for whatever mistakes you made and just a few days space and then an apology and some improvement will go a long way MOST of the time. We are all human and we all make mistakes...both men and woman but if it was on your end, don’t do the 30 days. You’re giving her everything she needs to walk away.

[@rosemariecooksey6574]

im crying my husband left me one month ago 😔😔😔

[@jacksonscully9260]

This makes a lot of sense. Corey Wayne always says go no contact but that never sat well with me.

[@jasminemendez2214]

This is so true. I've had so many guys try to come back after months of no contact, but I've had enough time to realize that a man that pushes me away for so long isn't someone that values me so therefore I lose attraction for this person completely. We fall for effort and consistency, not indecision and coldness for months!

[@mahdavimail]

Completely agree no contact doesn't work in these days for many reasons

[@jasonsong6743]

So on point! No contact rule works differently for men and women!

[@naufalrahmanA25]

I agree with you, me too everywhere all i found was no contact rules and all when it comes to how to get back with your ex gf. i don't really like that approach. that's just doesn't make any sense. ok maybe it worked on some ex'es but i don't think it would work on my case. cause just like he said when the woman doesn't feel it anymore you just make it more easier for her to forget you. I really like this video he confronting this method. The reason why i broke up is one of many was i rarely contact her and now when we broke up everyone suggest me to do no contact approach. i'd be damned.

[@chriskb2495]

If no contact for the dumpee helps him get over the relationship, imagine how easily the dumper will move on

[@joshuaamoncio5148]

NC is for moving on, Even if I still had this lingering feelings for my ex, I just don't want her back. She broke up with me (*Its not you, its me cliché*) And i ventured NC right after. NC is a Tool for Moving on, not trying to get your ex back. Using NC for manipulation is bad and often perceive as a greedy move. Focus on yourself and ignore those who DGAF.

[@ninikhan1956]

Hell yes, we girls break up once we're really done and if the guy doesn't come to us right after a little time, we totally dissociate and detach with him. Because we're only attracted to a man when we feel he belongs to us, once he goes cold turkey, we begin to consider him no more than just a stranger and 30 days are just enough to form a new habit. A new habit of living without him, moving on and working on ourselves and our future.

[@rulantpalupy]

Believe me, im a woman, and this is so true.

[@mrkeitt]

Realizing how I messed things up and expecting NC to be the solution is actually pretty crazy. I was 5 days NC when I saw one of Dan's videos and I text her saying I was reminded of her when I was at The mall. Although she took 1.5 hr to reply , she was friendly asking what I saw and said she misses me too. I replied like an hr later describing what I saw that reminded me of her and told her I was just reaching out because she crossed my mind. She didn't say anything else. But I passed the anxiety text because she INTENTIONALLY took long to reply as well as stopped texting to see if I'd revert to my old ways. I'll wait a few more days and reach out. Meanwhile exhibiting self control is hopefully a good way of reattracting her gradually. NC isn't for my situation.

[@WhereToFind]

I wish I saw this. Smh I did no contact and my ex moved on.

[@lilyhkan3733]

Yes ita true.. my ex is used no connect rule about 2 months and , i did not any sms and call and i was really upset and i was relly moved on. After 3 months he connect me but even i love him i dont go back to him because of his was the one ignoring me. And after 6 months i saw he is with someone i dont suprise and sad for that. I was doing right way. When i saw them its make me win because he look really not happy with that women and i was smiled myself why he is that woman because of she is not really his type. :)

[@bitcoincallao1499]

Started no contact 14 days ago to get her back, now I find it's too late... oh well.

[@martinnlaudico1494]

The love of my life does not desire me anymore. She keeps saying im "spent". what do I do? Everybody deserves a second chance.

[@annoncoding3395]

2 weeks ago she has said that she has caught herself many times thinking about me. She then said that she grew that feeling again. That she still loves me. When we broke up she had told me that she wasn’t in love with me nor loved me. But now all of a sudden she tells me that she loves me. What now???

[@victorwan2426]

in my case, he losts interest in me. He found a prettier girl, and I was left in the cold. He's happy now and I'm heartbroken 😞 trying to cope through this situation every day of my life...

[@adventureexpedition4693]

I found this video and I’m in 17th day of NC. I don’t know what to do I’m confused

[@edwardkan3489]

Thanks you teach me “attraction is love” though it is literally confusing ,but it is truth.

[@cosmospray]

This guy tells the truth i can tell as a woman...

[@tonycastro6386]

Thank you. This truth hurt but was seriously needed

[@patriciasantizo1392]

When a woman make an action like no contact rule,it means she wants to move on frm the guy for good..And no comeback ever😉😁😑Thanks for the video Regards Frm Philippines....

[@mpawl1524]

Dan i broke up because she closed off 6 months ago and stopped saying I love you, I told her I wasn't happy and ended it, I then of course regretted it a few days later and pleaded, but she said we should stay apart, she starting dating another guy very soon after, he met her mom within a month of our bu, and she took him on the trip I was supposed to go on! I started a 45 day NC that was suggested, I feel like I missed my opportunity!

[@SoulfulVeg]

My ex from 5 years ago tried that. When he tried to communicate again, I had already reflected on the relationship and thought it was a good thing we broke up. He pops up every few months since then, but never tried to make things right. So I just blocked him last year.

[@reverietapes]

Today as I'm typing this is my first day of no contact and I'm already feeling paranoid and imagining scenarios idk if I should wait a month or a week or indefinitely

[@oceanz2174]

This is the real truth. No contact rule just widens the gap and spoils even the little chance of having her back. It just shows she made the right decision to let you go especially now that you don’t even try to fix things up.

[@lovingme6896]

This is true. The guys I left were because I didn’t have any attraction towards them anymore

[@oceanz2174]

Imma subscribe right away. You speaking real truth not just making people excited and remain empty at the end of the day.

[@anastasiashatalina1219]

Finally, somebody telling the real truth.

[@fionam3735]

I went no contact and my husband went off with someone else go figure!!

[@greghammond7416]

Amen to that!! She’ll never forget what I did to her, that I was an asshole!!

[@imchentoshi1526]

I wish i have seen this earlier. My ex girlfriend call me during no contact and i ignored her. After completing no contact, i contacted her but she cold than ever😢😢😢

[@michaelhawthorne4586]

Im in a ldr and just after a trip she’s gone home said she doesn’t feel the same anymore doesn’t love me the same way anymore. She says she doesn’t know what she wants and wants to prioritise herself vs the relationship she’s given up so much for . I’ve made huge changes and it took the break up before for me to go into therapy. I’m trying but it’s not good enough . We’ve agreed on space and no contact but I don’t know what it is i can do to win or bring any feelings back apart from space. I have flights in 5 weeks but I’m now worried if I go it would be a huge mistake and she already would of moved on if I don’t contact for the next 3-4 weeks . Very confused on what to do . All I know is that she doesn’t feel the same way anymore and hasn’t for a while and wants space.

[@JustinDAMusic]

I'm so pissed off that I didn't watch this video sooner. No contact rule is BS.

[@0starberry0]

He left me bc I don’t think he loves me anymore but uses school as a excuse to leave me. He told me to move on.... I miss him

[@JEROMEGELB]

Women have always wanted power in relationships with men, the smart ones able to maintain power whilst not appearing to desire it. Whilst some may describe this as manipulation, others may consider the benefits of covert power worth the strategy. Relationships that succeed long term are able to resolve the universal "power struggle" embedded in almost every relationship, primarily by acknowledging its existence & finding ways together to share power by negotiation.Women who use the no contact rule for 30-60 days are almost certainly NOT women with whom a successful relationship is possible, as it flags the likelihood of future manipulation, emotional blackmail and being treated with contempt and for concrete gain rather than for love.

[@notstonkss9417]

Man this opened my eyes...

[@relaxmarg4074]

Wow it's one of the best vedio I have ever seen on no contact rule.

[@nelsondewaard9267]

Great... I was at Day 29. Thanks Dan :-(

[@Unknown-kn4vx]

Breaking NC at day 64... Here goes nothing

[@junelee5975]

But women breaks up like fake break up to see whether the bf really loves her. So please show more love instead of going cold on her. Or lose her forever

[@UrNemesis_]

Yea I feel like I needed to see this.

[@ozzybrooks5316]

isn't it best not talk for day a month if you were needy in the relationship? caught between sending a message and doing no contact

[@SoberIrishman]

Glad u brought this up

[@HeisenBerg255]

Dan, I've been applying what I learn by getting the EX back super system. My wife even said that I becoming everything she wanted from me, my wife canceled our meetup because she says it was to difficult to see me because she didn't want to get back together and I could tell she was about to start crying. I didn't let it phase me, I was cool and confident and said I understand in a cool and upbeat way. The thing is she moved in with her parents and I know they are pushing for a divorce and discouraging her from seeing me. Any tips for me?

[@DanBacon_]

Great to hear of your progress so far. You need to push her into action by using Plan A from the system (i.e. make sure that you are doing a great job of Step 3. That's what makes all the difference). You might worry that her parents won't like the effects of Step 3, but don't worry about that. What matters most is how SHE feels about you. If she is feeling drawn to you again and worried about losing YOU, that's when things will change quickly. BTW: Here are some additional tips for you: www.themodernman.com/blog/8-things-that-will-make-your-ex-begin-to-see-you-in-a-more-positive-light.html

[@HeisenBerg255]

Dan Bacon thank you Dan. Your system works great, my wife and I are very close to reunion.

[@Shedlyhikey]

The fact that your picture is from breaking bad makes comment this more interesting to read because Walter had horrible problems with his wife himself lol

[@Groglor]

I wish I knew these steps im messing up with my messages after the breakup and shes not replying after I said something that pissed her off. Im really worried and heartbroken.