The Impossible species by Hetardo | Humans are space Fae | HFY | TFOS1051

Original Story :
/ the_impossible_species
RandomShtuff Podcast : • RandomShtuff Podcast N...
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Thank you to Tier 4 and 5 Patreons and Channel Members:
Brenton Verlo
John Silva
H-Town
Mezec
LanScaper
William Howard
PlagueRunner
FallenAngel
Fannar Hjálmarsson
Datamagnet
Bob the Dragon
Sergeant Boomer
Cat Crab Lobster
Duck Machine
{TimeStamps}
00:00 Intro
00:40 The impossible species
#Audiobook #Fiction #HumansAreSpaceOrcs
----Socials----
Email : [e-mail]
Twitter : / agrosquerrils
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Lbry : @AgroSquerrilNarrates
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This Story is Classified as HFY , but what does the Mean?
-------------
HFY is a story/series that takes a “human element” in either humanity or an “other” (race/species or object) that exists in a “setting” (future or other world/universe) with varying levels of culture, technology, society and history that help show in some shape or form the potential good or bad for humanity’s race/culture.
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Taken from the FAQ of the r/HFY subreddit.

[@Talon1124]

The fact the humans in this wear suits at all times and live in orbital habitats makes me think of the Quarians from Mass Effect.

[@derrickmiller9776]

I had the same thoughts. It would be very interesting if these humans made contact with them.

[@yu_meausealot]

@@derrickmiller9776 i am thinking the same thing

[@dannybryant1114]

It made me think of G gundam

[@kayakMike1000]

Ya know... I wonder if we COULD design a long term environmental suit. It's an interesting idea.

[@Amoth_oth_ras_shash]

that or... ''gas mask noises intensifies in a rythmic tone to the death corp of krieg'' ^^

[@dementededge3266]

Honestly wouldn't be surprised if we had a space station orbiting a black hole just to see if we could.

[@richardseaton1570]

Interesting point. Logically by orbiting one, it would create a large amount of observational and tactical safety.

[@mstrfool]

@@richardseaton1570 Not to mention time dilation. In theory, one could potentially watch to the end of the universe.

[@thepanzerofthelake732]

You three forget that if we could put a bunch of mirrors around a black hole then we'd have a source of infinite energy

[@ballsacsincorp]

@@thepanzerofthelake732 no time to watch harems, klaus we must defeat ze soviets

[@eldarkarin7525]

Yeah you can get a lot of energy out of a small spinning black hole. They are smaller but even more powerful than some stars, black hole Dyson spheres are easier to build, are as efficient and last SO MUCH LONGER because black holes die much slower

[@royalroses123]

Human: Hey umm the city's getting crowded Admiral: No probs just split a section

[@wellhello1575]

Humans: space bacteria.

[@ryanmarshall7994]

The description of the aliens as all being considerably smaller and requiring more support to move around ( only two legs being unique ), would imply that they all evolved on planets with higher gravity than earth not less. Not that it affects the story at all, I'm just a nerd who's mind gets caught up on those things.

[@williamhealey1223]

That evolutionary bias is generally false. Evolution is not so straight forward.

[@cassiswyrm8121]

@@williamhealey1223 You've met enough aliens from enough worlds of varied sizes to prove that the idea of there being such a trend on average is definitely false?

[@hi14993]

if the planet had less gravity then surely in order to survive they would have to adjust in size since the atmosphere would be unable to hold as much air. for example at various times in earth's history, when oxygen was abundant, life grew to absurd sizes. when oxygen was limited, life tended to shrink. I grant this assumes that atmosphere density is directly proportional to gravity strength.

[@angrydragonslayer]

@@hi14993 you have reminded me of the 2 meter long cockroach predecessors At 1am Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[@allen5253]

@@hi14993 you are wrong about gravity to air. Yes back in the carboniferous period had high oxigen because it had less carbon dioxide cause the plants turned it to oxigen. So your theory holds no air. The bugs got big because of higher oxigen. But dinosaur got bigger and so did mammals with lower oxigen. So please try a theory that has real support. Lol

[@kashkara_8943]

The algorithm marches eternally towards the unseen horizon

[@AgroSquerril]

For the algorithm

[@isaiahwilson4943]

Throught he glory of the algorithm, I shall know no -fear- boredom.

[@nocount7517]

There are actually cases of spontaneous human combustion, usually accompanied with the consumption of a large amount of alcohol.

[@yimingwang8037]

huh?

[@gillsmoke]

And smoking. Funny how the cases have plummeted to 0 as the rates of smoking cigarettes dropped.

[@adrianmcbride1666]

Alcohol and smoking if I remember correctly.

[@idkimlikereallybored9533]

@@adrianmcbride1666 its not really spontaneus combustion if theres a combustable substance and fire tbh

[@adrianmcbride1666]

@@idkimlikereallybored9533 if I remember correctly, cigarettes usually don't burn well enough enough to set much alight.

[@albusvoltavern4500]

Can’t wait for humans are space goblins

[@AgroSquerril]

pretty sure that one would be NSFW if Goblin Hunter has taught me anything

[@Chaos77777]

@@AgroSquerril ^ Evidence of a wise man

[@straydogswagger4280]

Did somebody say....GAAAAAWBLINS?!

[@thegreenmanofnorwich]

I really like stories where we're not necessarily orcs, but rather just strange or even pixie like.

[@kurtismiller9544]

A much different take on humanity in the future, somewhat thought provoking.

[@richardseaton1570]

Cheers. I don't like how all HFY tends to be "Humans are combat gods and chaotic space orcs", but are still innately understood. No writers put anything tragic in, and few make real efforts to try and make humans actually alien to aliens. Hence tall, thin, consistently irrational and contradictory, and so abhorrently alien in nature so as to inspire fear in any sapient species.

[@Neo3151]

@@richardseaton1570 Personally i'm never fond of the ones that focus on how we are so peace loving and make us into a hippy race with no balls that do everything for the pursuit of peace. They always feel played up and in no way a realistic dive into humanity in the greater universe. I am a massive fan of the more aetherial human depictions though making humans truly strange to the other races (i love how this one is going for the fey especially) or depictions of space religions (which no matter what are always cool in my book) and otherworldly abilities relating to their faith. I also really love the more brutal depictions of humanity.

[@paradoxequinox4104]

@@Neo3151 I feel ya. To be honest, I've always wanted to see a more scary telling of humanity. Like how star trek did the Terran empire kind of deal, humans going out into the universe and taking what they want. I've got nothing against more peaceful versions of humans in space, but I feel like sometimes people forget just how petty much of humanity is.

[@ianharrison5758]

@@Neo3151my favorite stories are the ones that express that the inherent humanity within us desires peace when it’s possible, but demands blood when it’s owed. We are a social collectivist species with sapience and thus individuality that often bucks against that collective nature. We couldn’t survive without Eachother, if hominids weren’t social and inclined to peaceful coexistence we’d never have been able to survive in the environment that forged our ancestors. At the same time, humans have also always been one of if not the single biggest threat to human life, we have a sense of otherness and tribalism ingrained in us just as deeply as our loneliness and inability to function as species outside of groups. We need eachother but we are our own competition at the same time. It can be a very thought provoking story if they don’t try to make some moral grandstanding ass story with the humans being allowed virtue signal our peace and also be justified in our wars. If you wanna talk about our peace you must talk about our carnage, and if you want to speak of our atrocities you must also speak on those who bled and died to slow or stop them. Too many hfy stories try to use the story as a way to say “hey war is dumb so yeah we humans chill lmao” and it doesn’t come off the way they think it does to me. The very definitions of our peace is written in the blood of our war, conflict is deeply in our nature and stories that can reflect that without making it a virtue signal jerk off session or xeno torture porn where they kill like 5 humans we glass their homeworld

[@whitefanful]

The idea of humans just living in their suits is an interesting one for all the fun stories that could be done with it. Just thing of the myths the aliens would have about what humans really look like.

[@PoldaranOfDalaran]

This was one of the more interesting depictions of Humans I've heard in these. Those space cities are really, really interesting sounding.

[@ladyodragons3849]

I must ask: did we let cats and dogs go extinct? And if they tragically did, did we recreate mechanical ones in space?

[@Ben-li9zb]

there is no way they were not recreated if they were ever lost

[@hunterv9983]

If something happens to the cats and dogs, we Humans would eradicate whatever did the dastardly deed. Then we would try to recreate that which we lost.

[@thiccthighssavelives5866]

If something happens to cats and dog, we Humans would eradicate whatever did the dastardly deed. Then we would try to recreate that which we lost.

[@kingcrafteroderderfahradtu7331]

[Put copied text here]

[@Otgel]

@@hunterv9983 *points nerf gun to self* "bastards"

[@YourBoyNobody530]

I could see humans altering their production of myostatin and the function of their osteocytes to prevent the negative effects of gravity.

[@blaineadams7484]

Love the intro, and of course "for the algorithm!"

[@AgroSquerril]

For the algorithm , glad you like

[@blaineadams7484]

@@AgroSquerril you're doing a great job. I appreciate what you put into your readings, very entertaining.

[@M33f3r]

Rythyms algo

[@kanewilson8624]

5:40 actually yes we have, there’s not only been documented historical events depicting as such (both in painting and in history books) it’s mentioned in the offical medical document on ailments

[@mstrfool]

While I won't speak on spontaneous, I managed to ignite myself several times. I recommend not.

[@hello_i_exist_uwu]

@@mstrfool well since you commented I assume you’re ok rn

[@mstrfool]

@@hello_i_exist_uwu As I'm still doing it from time to time, can't claim OK. But, I can say I'm none the worse for the events. Heh.

[@hello_i_exist_uwu]

@@mstrfool heh

[@MurkyWaters677]

All if not most cases of spontaneous human combustion are caused by the "wick effect". The wick effect is when someone literally burns like a candle. Their body fat being the tallow for a big ass tallow candle. Typically stated by cig or small open flame.

[@illusiveelk2558]

Human spontaneous combustion can in fact happen, but not because of oxygen.

[@kalskirata42]

We are the Imperiun of Man, and welcome to the DreamScape

[@yyeetmax2849]

i still remember a story about the "ultimate troll" a human who went to a planet full of ruins where a god resides only to troll him because funny, though i cant seem to find that story anywhere

[@CaptainShield]

The nanites stole me lunch!

[@AgroSquerril]

was a good lunch

[@thomassmith6232]

I can't imagine Earth remaining uninhabited if it was livable at all, predators or no. Our ancestors faced such and survived, and our pioneer spirit would live on.

[@streetrat00]

It's not that it's unlivable but that it is now a protected location. They don't want to harm the Earth a second time.

[@thomassmith6232]

@@streetrat00 So there may be people there, but they're not supposed to be.

[@J-Ru89]

It also said irradiated which sorta infers to Nuclear War and Fallout, then restored so probably mutated horrors

[@thomassmith6232]

@@J-Ru89 In any case there's probably at least a corps of overseers of some type, if for no other reason to keep squatters from coming in and messing things up.

[@rogerbeckner6419]

Or it might be that after living so long in the void, they could no longer tolerate Earth-normal conditions without their life support systems. Read of the physiological reports of long-term flights abord the ISS. Now do you REALLY want to go into space for like say.....three years? The hardware can get to Mars, it's just the soft squishy protoplasm that has the problems.

[@justsomejerseydevilwithint4606]

I listened to three stories and subscribed. I love this genre, and you voice it well, if a bit more boisterous than I'm used to.

[@AgroSquerril]

glad you are enjoying the content and welcome to the crazy house

[@shardinhand1243]

3:20 i want to show this friendly alien some videos of olimpic gymasts, that shits crazy. the speed pricision flexibility and agility they have is other worldly even to me.

[@neuralmute]

Oh yeah! And maybe some dancers, skaters, martial artists, and acrobats. Show them Cirque de Soleil, the best of Jackie Chan, Rudolph Nureyev dancing with Margot Fonteyn, the greatest figure skaters ever; those xeno minds would be blown.

[@shardinhand1243]

@@neuralmute bro jackie chan is my hero!!! that guys awesome!

[@idkimlikereallybored9533]

May the algorithm bless you with viewership

[@AgroSquerril]

Thank you , For the algorithm

[@Zack0]

fascinating as usual. if we were to truly doom our world to seek shelter underneath the very rock we now walk upon. will be truly be able to reach for the stars? let alone dream of them. when all we have known are the iron walls and endless caverns.

[@bethanysmith5856]

The space cities seems very fantastic but also something that we'd do.

[@yomogami4561]

idic - infinite diversity in infinite combinations why i like hfy stories thanks for the story and the narration

[@AKUJIVALDO]

You forgot include O, T and I after second i...

[@anothernameless2634]

Masterfully written

[@MrPlayFilm]

Happy days everyone, Friday, got great news, and space story. Happy times.

[@elfeater1760]

For the "AGRORITHM "

[@nos2342]

To please the algorithm is all

[@AgroSquerril]

For the algorithm

[@kennethhummel4409]

Well wattayaknow!!! We’re the elves and not the monsters on nightmares!.... this time.

[@Chokah]

There is a story about how compared to other species we are almost impossibly small, having to ride on other species shoulders to avoid being accidentally stepped on. We ended up being like space gnomes since some people would stow away in the spaces between walls and help out without being seen

[@henrypaleveda7760]

I think that i like humans as space fea more than space orcs or even on the same par as space dwares

[@kabob0077]

Space Elves, Space Dwarves, and Space Fae are underappreciated compared to Humans Are Space Orcs... Although I want a Humans Are Space Orks story, note the difference in spelling...

[@henrypaleveda7760]

@@kabob0077 what about "humies ah da orks!

[@icefyer2]

What about humans as space-kobolds? Superficially similar to dwarves: underground, mining out great bunker-cities, but they're freaking EVERYWHERE and use crazy cunning instead of staunch traditionalism and stout strength and if you make peace with them they'll gladly convert massive underground arcologies for you in exchange for being allowed to live there too.

[@andruloni]

How about humans are space orcas?

[@henrypaleveda7760]

@@andruloni I've seen plenty of good stuff and it is entertaining, I just find the dwarf adjacent ones more entertaining in concept. Writing though, I'll take good writing over any of those themes

[@Bonesaw4444]

Reverse it so I can get my socks back!

[@AgroSquerril]

i did but then they dropped an uno reverse and i have none left

[@kayakMike1000]

I would like to think that humans would form a Republic rather than an imperium. Though... Humans republics throughout history are somewhat rare.

[@andruloni]

Though in this one it looks like the Imperium conquers barren rocks and rules over empty space

[@sovietpowersupereme6231]

I'm imaging a human city going "I'm in your walls I'm in your walls" To a random alien empire

[@Eramiserasmus]

Algorithm marches toward victory over the subscribe button!

[@jewelstroud7191]

“Human’s are space fea” fea???? Oh dear, that makes us suddenly MUCH more dangerous then I thought

[@user-zv6th8fh8v]

So WH40K where all dangerous xenos got extinct.

[@ianhogben3472]

Hello hello 40k ist

[@Tommy-5684]

otherwise known as the golden era before the dark age of technology

[@user-zv6th8fh8v]

​@@Tommy-5684 Not quite right. The Imperium of humanity got its name after the formation of the monarchy, respectively, after the Emperor revealed himself to the public, respectively, after the the Dark Age of Technology and the The Age of Strife (around M25-30). During the dark age of technology, both Orcs and Eldar existed and they were known to disparate state formations of humankind. However, many millennia remained before the Horus heresy and the appearance of the Chaosits. There was no Drukhari faction. And the tyranids haven't arrived in galaxy yet. Described corresponds more to the period after the events of Battlefleet Gothic: Armada (M41)

[@Tommy-5684]

@@user-zv6th8fh8v what i meant is what the story explaned was closer the the golden age before the Dark age of Technology when humanity still had a star spaning empire but was not quite so hostile

[@barakreeves9360]

How did co2 destroy the atmosphere to the point that you need a bio suit like no plants or oxygen factories or was it nuclear war???

[@Theminecraftian772]

It probably wasn't just CO2. Probably a bunch of other greenhouse gasses, foreign chemicals attempting to correct the atmosphere/regulate the temperature, and nuclear waste being improperly handled that lead to all that. Along with mass scale nuclear war. that too.

[@whitefanful]

It would not have been CO2, more likely it was CO which is the real danger. Carbon Dioxide is not all that harmful since it fuels plants and such it is more Carbon Monoxide which chokes plants and other green house gases that would have wrecked the world.

[@mcarrowtime7095]

CO2 realistically couldn’t. You can chemically separate carbon and oxygen, and you can use electrolysis on the rising seas for both O2 and power from H2. Humans are incredibly good at fixing their mistakes, and very bad at not making them.

[@junisaresilvosa9430]

i stopped what i'm doing just to hear the story more clearly.

[@MrJay_White]

that intro was gold.

[@AgroSquerril]

glad you liked

[@thinkingoutloud6741]

James Blish. “Cities in Flight” Classic Sci-Fi. Highly recommended

[@asandrewsilvaw]

For the algorithm

[@sherylcascadden4988]

A comment to appease the algorithm and help the channel

[@allenmorgan1007]

For the Algorithm, For the Author(s), For the Disembodied Voice!

[@victortahlor4038]

Thank You for the reading

[@robbierobbo4318]

It baffles me that you aren't huge yet

[@AgroSquerril]

one day at a time , one sub at a time and we will get there eventually

[@jonf2009]

Honestly the best place to stay safe in a galactic space with other potential hostile species would be Dyson tubes between stars. Not many terrestrial bound sapients would look there for resources.

[@DEMONOFLOVEANDDEATH]

Bless the Squerril Bless the Author

[@AgroSquerril]

for the algorithm

[@richardseaton1570]

for the algorithm

[@lsporter88]

Excellent.

[@seldonwright4345]

Snap or break off a piece of a city? Hmm. Lets use a tiny chunk for a town or Trading Post! Use more rocks for farming! Ah lah Farmer in the Sky.

[@macpurdy]

For the algorithm and the narrator

[@michaelbarnard8529]

100 m/s is only double the speed of a fastball.

[@merlinathrawes746]

Instead of floating cities, I think I would prefer encircling mega-structures.

[@paytonkraft7564]

Why did this story make me think of 40k's eldar?

[@ckl9390]

I've thought for a while that, to an alien, our high oxygen atmosphere (measurable by spectrography) would appear as completely toxic. They would assume that there would be constant uncontrolled oxidation events, rendering the planet completely hazardous if not outright lethal. When oxygen was initially produced as a waste product of the first cyanobacteria it killed almost everything around it. The first mass extinction event was caused by oxygen. Also, on the point of the cities budding off or dividing when they get too large, I've imagined long haul ships that could do the same. The standard centrifugal cylindrical ship hulls as capable of building on their length segment by segment. The toroidal segments can separate down to individual completely viable autonomous vessels, assuming appropriate internal provisions. Though stacks of segments more than a dozen long are typical as engines are more difficult to produce and there is an economy to scale. This way, as a ship putters around a system doing typical tasks (though especially mining) it actually gets longer, then divides about in half then it gets too long. This also solves the problem of shipyards, as each ship is capable of being a shipyard in and of itself. Populations onboard can grow and go in different directions as necessary. The idea also works very well as colony ships. This standard stacked toroidal-cylindrical design allows for acceleration based simulated-gravity in three directions, radially by spinning when velocity is otherwise constant, and moving linearly forward or back when long haul travel (and deceleration from it) is underway. Of course with procedures to accommodate for when "down" changes.

[@andruloni]

Human ships as Space Bacteria

[@mrchilli3621]

Time for stellaris

[@bestcomment3201]

FOR THE ALGORITHM!!!

[@AgroSquerril]

For the algorithm

[@drakkonis1]

Thanks!

[@AgroSquerril]

it is my pleasure , thank you for the massive dono , its very much appreciated!

[@drakkonis1]

@@AgroSquerril So is what you do.

[@AgroSquerril]

@@drakkonis1 :)

[@armadillo3454]

I hope im not the only one picking up on some warhammer vibes from this beyond just "imperium"

[@polasamierwahsh421]

Nice

[@AgroSquerril]

:)

[@stm7810]

good story.

[@AgroSquerril]

glad you enjoyed

[@NovaEmberlyn]

"and I hope you enj-" _video ends_

[@guardianofthetoasters2323]

Im..... Perium?.... *oh... fuck* RUN XENOS! RUN AND SAVE YOUR SOUL!

[@genericuser984]

neat

[@AgroSquerril]

:)

[@Germlin]

(:

[@losthero0]

Imperium? Oh no

[@loganjamesonhatch5050]

Sees that humans arnt orks this time, how strange

[@AgroSquerril]

Indeed :)

[@thegrimreaper1892]

Wait a second. Did you add music to your intro?

[@AgroSquerril]

i did indeed , but only this one... the other 4 should still be the same

[@thegrimreaper1892]

@@AgroSquerril ah ok. I was so caught off guard because I never noticed it before. I like it

[@sethfischer7368]

What was the story of ar on all the aliens and someone hacked it to rob the station but humans didn't use ar so the human could see the theif???

[@ironworksdragon6843]

Bob the dragon

[@Germlin]

Bob the dragon

[@GravitWry]

14:27 something tells me that this is a Bee Movie reference.

[@herobrineroth4185]

First

[@AgroSquerril]

nice

[@lol_imagine_im_a_girl]

Lol humans became bees

[@Southern_Crusader]

Anyone calls me Fae, Imm calling them target practice.

[@RodneyG669]

There's nothing wrong with being fae.

[@meis18mofo77]

sounds like something a fey would say, I agree though.

[@rshtg2019]

Fae? That's new, its normally orcs, quite the opposite

[@kayakMike1000]

Headphones on backwards! 😆

[@AgroSquerril]

:)

[@anonimoanonimado1096]

Second

[@ComfortsSpecter]

4:48 False Like funny enough FALSE

[@stanleyrichard4678]

Third

[@quiksilvrm]

Did something happen to your video assembly pipeline? Your thanks for viewing bit at the end has been truncated for the past few vids.

[@Tmonger127]

A comment for the Algorithm.

[@AgroSquerril]

For the algorithm

[@gigma.8492]

Atmosphere and Oxygen levels can also affect the height of living creatures. And being to large can be a terrible hindrance for technological advancement. Can you imagine an intelligent race the size an elephant trying to make a rocket? Or even a car for that matter. They would also need to posses the ability to create tools. In order for a race to use tools they would need to be generally weaker than the surrounding predators. After all if a species is strong from the start they have no need to rely on tools to help them. Of course different variables can also change that. For instance something large on our planet may be very small on another. This could also force them to develop tools for survival.

[@maxxammax0]

!emhtiroglA eht roF

[@AgroSquerril]

for the algorithm

[@NyanBinary1066]

I really dont see the fey comparison in this story. It feels loose.

[@fatsoup3067]

Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[@josmeijers2818]

F.T.A !

[@AgroSquerril]

For the algorithm

[@WiredTurkey316]

!mhtirogla eht roF

[@AgroSquerril]

deedni

[@jacknomusanom9159]

Click

[@AgroSquerril]

click

[@Germlin]

click

[@neuralmute]

click

[@logankuhlman7054]

That intro is not fun when your high

[@tankertom3243]

Too preachy.

[@rancidmarmot1994]

Not my favorite, found this one kinda dumb imo.

[@asandrewsilvaw]

For the algorithm

[@jimmycoyote74]

For the algorithm