The Link Between Trauma and Hypervigilance

[@hearttalkscoach]

Anyone else gotten really good at "reading people" because they've spent 30+ years hypervigilant to facial expressions and body tension?

[@sizzles48]

Yes. Me…this is me exactly

[@anigemini3958]

Same here, it's my superpower😉 I was trained my whole childhood 24/7

[@hearttalkscoach]

@@sizzles48 Silver linings right :)

[@hearttalkscoach]

@@anigemini3958 I like the reframe of training 😆 even if it was involuntary training its definitely a skill / superpower

[@houndmother2398]

I can tell how people respond to something I've said without them saying anything.

[@kaymoorehead8920]

As I've gotten older, I find myself isolating to avoid situations that dysregulate me. I feel less hypervigilant alone.

[@ablanccanvas]

That’s true because you don’t have ‘to gauge’ the situation. 👍🏽

[@earthrooster1969]

Exactly where I am..

[@kristianascharrenberg9958]

SAME👏👏

[@threefreaksonaleash6619]

Same here.

[@surfrby8876]

I’m the same

[@1metuka]

I resonate with hypervigilance and I have done years of therapy. I'm in my late 60's and sudden loud noises still make me jump and that definitely comes from my childhood.

[@lyndkent-cl2oe]

Sending huge hug. x

[@larsstougaard7097]

True

[@houndmother2398]

same here.

[@alexandrys]

EMDR or Brainspotting can help guys

[@christinemorgan5278]

At 77 I am still hyper vigilant after living for 16 years with an abusive husband whom I escaped from 39 years ago!

[@anigemini3958]

But I'm very proud of you, that you did!!!

[@Live1959-y7b]

Same here. All my bad stuff from years ago have long stopped but the affects are still going on to a lesser degree. I'll never trust anything 💯 it's become me. I can't even enjoy a shower because it's blocking me from listening out for my cat or myself.

[@ablanccanvas]

Hoping for a speedy journey to peacefulness. Much love ♥️

[@threefreaksonaleash6619]

I hope you have found as much peace as possible and are proud of yourself for escaping that nightmare. 🦅

[@chippychick6261]

Just retired and am now realizing just how much I’ve been living in surviving mode. Yes hypervigilance. The relief at letting it go is enormous.

[@Sci-lives]

I hope you enjoy your retirement

[@chippychick6261]

@@Sci-lives yes , I am. A year of decompressing.

[@houndmother2398]

I used to have a huge problem with hypervigilance. Grew up in an alcoholic home and all that comes with that. I was always, always, on guard. It's gotten better with age but it was hard.

[@saraafshar-md8ic]

I feel this on daily basis 😢

[@MoonSpinners]

Can’t stop crying. I’ve been hyper vigilant my whole life because of childhood trauma. NONE of the therapists I’ve seen has recognised this or even attempted to consider it.

[@ablanccanvas]

You are allowed to cry… 😌

[@MoonSpinners]

@@ablanccanvas …thank you, I seem to have opened the flood gates, just having you say I’m allowed to cry started me off again 😂😭

[@JustDontMove111]

You could wake up and realise your true nature? Much love to you❤

[@MoonSpinners]

@@JustDontMove111 ..thank you 🥰

[@ablanccanvas]

@@MoonSpinners| Much love ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@TracyNewton-q3b]

My hypervigilence seeks out trouble in public, if people need help, helping others in shops, etc. Learning to look after myself is so hard😢

[@AliseL22]

Hypervigilance is just so exhausting. After a serious traumatic event I'm slowly getting back to myself but it is a struggle. EMDR therapy has been very beneficial in my recovery. I have put in an order for your book - thank you.

[@lorettanericcio-bohlman567]

I’m hoping after Nov 5th my anxiety goes way down. 💙💙💙💙

[@meatwax]

Growing up as a gentle soul among Narccicissts,Ive self isolated for decades. Concuding that most people are selfish, stupid, and untrustworthy. The rise of social media only (something im not even on) has all but reinforced that position. I love kids and animals, they bring me peace...all of my hobbies are solo endeavors. I have a few very close friends. My interest in socializing has declined rapidly since 2016.

[@deanwitt7903]

I’m 51 . I was raised in a house that was like a war zone . Parents who fought like cat and dogs , emotional and physical abuse from parents . Then I went on to a relationship where my ex was a total nut case narcissist who took her pants off for any guy who smiled at her . Not recognising the red flags because I’d grown up with so many that were normalised , I had two kids with her . We separated and her abuse continued by trying to control my visitation of my children . I met someone else and 15 years latter we are still going strong but for the majority of my life I have learnt to be hypersensitive and hyper vigilant . One good thing it has taught me is to read people very fast and pretty well .

[@CheetahSnowLeopard]

Yes, controlling how I feel, controlling my environment, controlling everything. And going at a fast pace.

[@PinkLady54]

Yes I think this has always been me. Always driven to keep constant activity with ppl, with tv on, always going, in relationships... Never alone, never quiet. I had an extremely bad autoimmune flare 26 yrs ago that disabled much of my life. 70 now & with Jesus' help, changing my Way Of Eating to very low carb which included grain & dairy free & lately using THC free CBG & CBD plus always growing in my faith - I am finally feeling a lil like my old self without the agitation & drive to GO. I can be alone & very peaceful, music & tv are off most of the time, I enjoy being inside my own head & heart, I can look in mirror with peace & tranquility, just want to do what needs done & rest when appropriate. I still have ADD but not all that other stuff so I am busy with lots of irons in the fire but not driven manically to GO & find someone to be with or noise. Thank You Jesus for taking that load off my back, giving me wisdom to know I'm safe in Your hands & what I can change & how to change it through ppl like The Crappy Childhood Fairy & Alex Howard. Continue to bless them & prosper them in all their ways for all they do to help us straighten out our minds & hearts. 🤗😍🙏🏼🗝️💎

[@ablanccanvas]

Sounds like you are on a good path! Keep going. ♥️😌

[@PinkLady54]

@@ablanccanvas Thank You for the encouragement Christine. I must keep on the road; I look back & am sad, horrified & disheartened by what I see & lived. No going backward. 😰😱🤯 Light, Love & Life ahead!! 😍🎉😎🙏🏼🗝️💎🖖🏼

[@ablanccanvas]

@@PinkLady54| Much love ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@missylay3189]

Yes this is me for sure!

[@melissabeckham6917]

Thank you for a well spoken, clearly explained video.

[@lyndkent-cl2oe]

Thank you...💯more understanding.....I try to remind myself "life" is about learning...Leaning that being our pure authentic conscious self...Lots of tears on this journey....🙏

[@ablanccanvas]

You’re right about the “learning” part… good way to frame it. 👍🏽♥️😌

[@audioartisan]

I spent the entire pandemic being overprotective, because my son is immunocompromised. This has caused me to become constantly hypervigilant. I had no idea until I watched this, just how bad it was. Thank you for helping us all become aware!

[@kelleyrogers8107]

My entire life I’ve been on high alert I’m just now learning what to do this is amazing thank you I do feel broken but I don’t feel hopeless anymore

[@suzanneayer4177]

Wow! Thank you so very much for this insight - it explains me to the letter. Such a relief to finally put my finger on it…bought the book and registered for course xx❤

[@dianemalpass6855]

Ive come to the conclusion that i am like this because of several traumas and other.negative experiences. I am constantly waiting for something else to happen and feel i have to be ready for it. Its so awful and wearing. . I am 71 now and it seems to be getting worse.😢

[@ablanccanvas]

I think that you’re even talking/thinking about it is a good thing. Keep working at it… you’re on the path to healing. ✨♥️✨

[@Kunard144]

I find you become Empathic and very good at spotting narcissists straight away. I tend to read people from their heart now.

[@lisettem1891]

I always thought that my ability to read people was a special power I had. It was devastating to discover it was actually hypervigilance.

[@amandasymon4363]

Totally resonates with me. I need to buy your book 🙏

[@salravioli]

I’ve always wondered why I love doing boxing classes for years. I think my hyper vigilance made me aggressive and it’s a good outlet.

[@jermumyllyharju8826]

Very good explanation of the topic. Been working with my trauma of shame, which is in my core causing this hypervegilance reaction. Shame identity more detailly explained. Will definetly look at your book about the topic 👍

[@meldavies5556]

There are sooo many of us that feel this! I can't control this! Alex please help I've got your book as you mentioned but cannot read it as I am too stressed out and traumatised that go back more than 60 years, with generational trauma that goes back for decades. 😢

[@robynparkinson9347]

Agree, but there are limits to what a traumatised person can do for themselves if the trauma was developmental. Some at least of the healing comes through interaction with other human beings - for some of us, a therapist as well as family and friends

[@wittymystic7361]

This is true. It's also the case that if one is disabled from the trauma and finds themselves living in dangerous environments because of a low income, they will be forced to remain hypervigilant for their own safety.

[@robynparkinson9347]

Yes, very sadly most don't have the safe relationships needed just because of the results of trauma and probably can't afford therapy either.... Or can afford, but struggle to find safe therapeutic help....I recently read that 90+% of the homeless in one country were found to have PTSD or C-PTSD...

[@PinkLady54]

Why ask us to write here when from what I can tell You don't comment to us about our struggles. Do You read them? Have I just missed Your comments? Thank You for all You do & for using Your gifts for good for all of us. 🤗😍🙏🏼🗝️💎

[@JayJamsSpams]

He wants you to buy his book, not give you free advice or support 😢 A lot of content creators on KZbin are like this unfortunately.

[@scooble]

I noticed that meditation and mindfulness made me more aware of other people's emotional states, such as their tone of voice and body language. However, I also became more aware of my own emotional reaction to their reaction. Bringing consciousness to this awareness helped.

[@LAStars-sratS]

We became hyper vigilant because when young we were in dangerous situations and looked for any clues that could prepare us that danger was coming. Self protection because no one was there to keep us safe. As an adult I became exceptional at reading the micro ‘tells’ that ppl unknowingly express.

[@jenniferpeeso7172]

Thank you for educating on this topic. I have your book and this video is a reminder to keep reading it.

[@melliecrann-gaoth4789]

Thinking. Ruminating. Reading. Watching videos trying to fix. Solve. = hyper vigilance

[@dommccaffry3802]

Exactly. Who has got the bandwidth for all this in depth education when you are dysregulated ??

[@ioanacristinabratescumusca7412]

Good to be aware! Thank you! Could hypervigilance trigger a freeze response, over time?!

[@parisaforpeace]

The freeze response can be a sign that our nervous system is in overdrive. The polyvagal theory explains this.

[@Pinkyandthebrain290]

Well I learnt something new today about my mood. So I need to understand this more and look towards healthier coping strategies. ❤

[@JohnSmith-ks5xw]

Brilliant. Thank you. Very enlightening.

[@octajon]

So helpful! Thank you!

[@Jigolpets]

Helpful, thank you

[@SewHealthy8]

a small technique, spending a few moments on waking & just before sleep to say to myself inwardly , I am safe, over & over a few times, because I am in fact now physically living in a safe environment & my nervous system is stuck on high alert from many years when I wasn’t. It seems to be helping. Physical pain has reduced

[@deborahburrows3282]

Great video

[@justmadeit2]

I never feel relaxed. I’m 49 this has been most of my life since childhood

[@morningdevotionswithnickpe436]

Great presentation.

[@joanlarson1283]

thank you for this.

[@jilldickson4352]

It totally resonates with me sadly. 😢

[@XiangliYaooo]

Great information. 👍🏼🙏

[@surfrby8876]

All of this resonates with me ,It’s how I’ve lived my adult life , and it’s made it a very difficult and painful existence , but I it’s up to me ( each of us) to make the change and manifest a happy life, no one can do it for me , what we think we become ,,thank you for this video , lI’l. Get the book and subscribed !

[@chococat3028]

This totally resonates with me.

[@stevensings2023]

Can u get this from losing a parent? I also had an abusive father growing up.

[@Guidedsteps17]

Abandonment wound and attachment trauma, damage nervous system and vagus nerve

[@janjordan]

nice plug for ur book. no help with hypervigilance here.

[@janepollock8525]

Just bought the book.

[@mirasolmoya630]

Chinese face reading and non verbal body languange, I am obsessed with that

[@HydroDiver]

It's the absolute worst when you experience this without knowing that it's even happening.

[@Beautiful_Farm]

I was born into violence. Then married into violence and mental torture. I've been free for 3 years now. I turned my life over to God and He's been healing my spirit, mind and heart. Currently I live an isolated life- just work and go home. Finally, the constant feeling of impending doom is gone. Healing takes time. Go slow. Don't push yourself too fast. God bless you all.

[@drsalsa01]

OMG. This soooo me!

[@socratese5]

These techniques for healing would be great but what do you do when the world is becoming a dysregulated and traumatic environment itself

[@ElizabethLovegrove-cm1bb]

Definitely me

[@elisabethwyndaele5912]

Problem because off that I cannot walk anymore . I am isolated myself 😢

[@tinaw6111]

Please find someone to say Hello to. Anyone. You are not alone, not really. It feels so terribly like it, though.

[@rubychurch3466]

It’s awful living with this. 60 years in, and exhausted from it

[@ElizabethHurtado-py8ur]

No, not always...only when it's necessary.

[@lunaazul3000]

I'm the only person I know that can't relax with a professional massage, thanks to years of abuse as a child and teen.

[@emiliavicquery1342]

Me either. Never had one because there are very few people I can bear to touch me. Even manicures, hairdressers.

[@kirstinline]

essential to comprehend before you self diagnose adhd. i genuinely think the 'trauma' is modern life. its in the wrong gear.

[@heatherwiner2883]

100 percent.

[@frankslade33]

👍

[@grumblekin]

Hypervigilant to both external and internal factors. For decades. There is no joy in life

[@magentaangel5531]

I jump at any sudden noise or anyone creeping up on me.

[@DoreenWeed]

Are insomnia and anxiety related to hypervigilance?

[@katiemillward1690]

100 %

[@claudiamanta1943]

Yes, of course. I did try to let my guard down and kinda trust again. Guess what? I got hit again. Because why not? How not to get paranoid? I can’t fucking stand people anymore.

[@robertjames4953]

Who the hell got all their emotional needs met as a child? Just askin' for a friend.🥸